Three Nights a Week (2022) Movie Script

Which one is it?
I'm not sure.
It's fragile though.
How about backstage on the left?
Maybe we could put this here?
Sure, OK.
That looks perfect. Thanks.
We still have these two,
the neon...
That's staying there.
Maybe one here?
Can we try one of these, please?
Put it up against that corner.
- Like this?
- Yes. That's it.
It doesn't look bad.
But maybe...
I don't know...
Right, thanks!
- Come hold it. I'll...
- They're your photos!
That's better,
I said so all along!
Well?
The other way round.
I'm kidding, I'm kidding!
- Can we move on to the neon?
- Sure.
- Shall we hang it?
- Please.
Gently, gently.
THREE NIGHTS A WEEK
A year earlier
Today, December 1, is World AIDS Day.
Let's make as many people
aware as possible.
I'd like to thank
all the volunteers
who are here tonight.
We work with a number of bars.
Here's the list.
- Sorry.
- Loser.
- Evening.
- Hi.
Come on, young man,
you're in that alcoholic state
where you feel rich!
Five euros won't hurt.
And you two,
don't think I haven't seen you.
Right.
Do you have to give head
to get a coffee?
Here.
Thanks, sweetie.
- Do you have a light?
- Sure.
Not too cold?
No. I've known worse.
And that smile will warm me up.
- Who are you with?
- I'm taking photos for the clinic.
That's nice.
Are you a nurse?
No.
But my girlfriend
is an intern.
The new girl.
Samia, isn't it?
That's it.
Talking safe sex
is the best pickup line!
"Do you use rubbers?
Shall I show you?"
Jerrie.
Ah, sorry.
Baptiste.
Three cents? Fuck!
Talk about lean times!
It's empty.
Can I take your picture?
Sure. So we didn't put
our faces on for nothing!
Getting acquainted?
- Need anything, girls?
- We're good, thanks.
We've gotta go.
It's my show, you know.
Sure.
You're welcome to come.
That's sweet of you,
but we're busy.
Well, thanks for the coffee.
See you later, married man!
Having queens around
keeps the mood upbeat.
A bit like clowns in hospital.
Let's see.
Your nose is running.
Get off!
The area manager's report.
They'd have us auction our organs
to boost sales!
I'm sorry to say
they want 25% more sales.
I know.
But we can do it.
Customer service is key.
Drop everything
and advise customers.
What if they don't want our advice?
Explain with a big smile
that they look tired
and need that new coffeemaker!
All right?
Give it everything.
Thank you, everyone.
Excuse me, I got a shit gift
and I'd like to exchange it.
- Hello, brother.
- Hey, sister.
Wow, those eyebrows!
The girl's a cartoon.
What's her name?
Cookie Kunty.
You're into baking now, huh?
It reminds me of your childhood crush
on Jessica Rabbit.
You watched the VHS on repeat.
Don't!
That's good.
- Which one?
- This.
Oh hi, Cassandre.
I have some work to do.
See you in a bit.
Laters!
Are you two OK?
Yeah, fine.
How long is it now? 112 years?
Eight years now.
Not in old cat years!
Stand in line, girls.
Girls, you have to stand in line.
My co-worker will hand out condoms.
But wait in line for a test.
Wait, like at the post office.
I won't take any. Sorry.
Preparing a great exhibition for us?
I hope so. We'll see.
Aren't the queens coming?
Good evening!
Excuse me.
Stand in line, please.
- Why didn't you use a condom?
- And ruin the mood?
Taking meds for life
will ruin your fucking mood!
If you take risks,
you need PEP within 48 hours.
You show up a week later!
"I was wasted,
he came in my ass."
Maybe he could see a doctor?
That's why he's here!
Go to the truck.
They'll fit you in between hookers.
- Thanks, Jerrie.
- Jerk!
Jerrie?
He pushed my buttons!
You OK?
You've changed!
You didn't go for me in drag,
I figured I'd try as a he.
We only drag up at weekends.
With the Chinese girls,
there's already a language barrier...
See what I mean?
Arnaud.
But everyone calls me Bobel.
Because I'm a beau and a belle!
Here.
Isn't Cookie coming?
She's performing.
Want to come along?
Need your girlfriend's consent?
I know there's a project in this.
When I saw you two collecting,
it was like seeing
a unicorn at a sidewalk cafe.
A unicorn?
So your project's a bestiary?
The Fantastic Beasts!
We always need photos.
Would Cookie be up for it?
Maybe.
Cookie's on her way up, you know.
She hosts several nights,
and we're in the running
for the Drag Olympus.
- The what?
- Drag Olympus.
It's a European contest.
A win means a new you:
20,000 euros each.
The tryouts are soon.
20,000 euros is loads.
What's this then?
Just local talent.
The Drag Olympus
is like the Olympic Games.
Give her five euros.
Hi, handsome!
- Evening.
- Hello.
A euro for a drag dollar.
- What's that?
- The queens' currency.
You can tip your favorite.
Hands off, you!
I saw him first.
She's such a Christmas tart!
Here, I don't like it.
Come on.
Thanks.
Let's hear it for Tabatah Crash!
It was her first time, children.
So shower her with drag dollars!
You were great, honey.
Give her a big hand.
Hey handsome,
can you introduce me?
Give that here.
She's unique, she's intense,
pretty from afar, far from pretty...
Cookie Kunty!
Cookie is up for pics.
Tomorrow at 1?
Can I just...?
Excuse me.
You smell good.
You like it?
It's orange blossom.
Girl, they're just photos!
We're not in Odorama.
Cat got your tongue?
Can we get started?
The lace needs touching up, look.
There? Sure, no problem.
I love that.
Cookie, look.
Yeah, it's nice.
The taxi's on its way.
Are you coming?
I'll pick everything up later, OK?
I was going to buy you a meal.
In a corset,
all I can do is drink, sweetie.
If you change your mind,
say I invited you.
Evening.
You made it!
I'm so pleased.
Help yourself to a drink.
The one you were with earlier?
Hello.
I love this track!
Come on!
Come with me.
Send me the pics?
- Sure.
- What's your Insta?
I'm not on Insta.
Girl! It's about time you were.
Believe me.
Hang on, girl!
Hang on, hang on...
- I'm calling it a night.
- What?
I've got work tomorrow.
- Love you!
- Love you too, girl.
Goodnight. Safe home!
- What does she do?
- She's a pharmacist.
Can you stay a while longer?
I have to be home by 7am.
We can party till closing time, then.
Do you ever pay for drinks?
Wait, you'll ruin my makeup.
It's just padding!
What can you do, then?
That smells good!
I only have 20 minutes.
- Sure you're OK?
- Fine.
You can't keep this up.
It's the final year, I have to.
- Can I borrow a sweater?
- Sure.
Thanks.
What are you doing with this?
Nothing.
- It's Bobel's, it's for a project.
- I feel pretty, oh so pretty.
Samia, please,
don't play around with it.
I should go like this.
- It'll keep me warm.
- Take it off.
What'll you call me?
Samia the Oriental.
I told you to take it off!
Chill out.
I'm sorry, but it's Bobel's,
it's for a project.
It isn't that precious!
It's great you have a project.
That you're doing something.
That was the idea.
Stop implying
I'm doing nothing with my life!
I meant you always find excuses
not to do your own things.
You're cooking for me
rather than sorting your photos.
You're criticizing me for cooking now?
I'm not!
What's your problem?
Chill out.
I'm just saying not to forget yourself.
It's great you're doing your own thing.
I'm happy for you.
Just be careful.
It isn't ours.
Oh, come on!
I'll be home around 4am.
I'm going to be freezing.
Make sure you're hot,
so you can warm me up, OK?
Yes, ma'am.
Good.
Thank you.
And open the window.
Good luck.
Thanks.
What have you forgotten now?
Hey sweetie!
Didn't you get my text?
Bobel couldn't make it.
Cookie?
I love the apron!
Here you go.
Thanks.
It's good to see you.
Your voice isn't different.
No. Why?
You speak the same way.
I'm still me.
Of course, sorry.
Do we have to be wasted to smooch?
Of course not, sorry.
But this is my local bar,
and you work with Samia.
That didn't bother you
when we sucked cock!
Florence, can I have the check?
It's OK, I'll stop.
Another drink, son?
I, er... Yes, same again.
- Same again.
- Yes.
Thanks.
Tell me about your project.
Because I don't know
what I've agreed to.
I'd love to work on the contrast.
It's wonderful to see you
in off-stage situations.
You know, like
when you were smoking in the kitchen.
Would you mind if
I photographed you getting ready?
It's kind of complicated.
If I said yes to everyone,
my place would never be empty.
I understand.
But as it's you,
OK.
I spent all my time here.
The owner took me under her wing.
She'd cook for me.
You can put that down.
Is here OK?
Just a second.
Not bad, eh?
Yeah, it's nice.
And this
is my Alaa frock for the Drag Olympus.
If we make it to the final, that is.
It's silk. It cost a fortune.
Jerrie says you're in the running.
We're off to the tryouts soon.
We've got a warm-up show
before the semi-final in Marseille.
You should come if you're free.
Me?
Yes.
What will I do in Marseille?
Take pictures.
Keep still.
I'm not sure about the clothes.
Spot on, huh?
You OK, Kate Winslet?
Let me look at you.
You're beautiful.
I'm going to go.
It's late.
As you wish, Cinderella.
I'll call you.
About the shoot at your place.
- All right?
- OK.
Hello.
Hi, sweetie.
It's OK, he's with me.
You know the hostel rates.
Seven euros if he sleeps here.
We'll be gone before midnight!
- You big faggot!
- Sorry?
You put your face on too.
- What's your problem?
- Forget it.
I'm not too scary, am I?
You should never accept less
than 100 euros for a show.
The wig costs 70.
10 for the spray to style it.
Then there's the outfits,
makeup, fake nails,
working on your act.
Under 100 euros,
you're working for free.
Then again,
to be honest,
I've done gigs for drink tokens.
How do you manage with work?
It isn't easy.
Sometimes I'm up for 36 hours.
I missed one day.
My feet were killing me.
Haven't you told them?
With big chains,
the less they know, the better.
- I'd get flak for missing targets.
- I know, I'm a manager.
Fuck! No way.
The enemy.
Where do you work?
The electronics store in St. Lazare.
- And you?
- Sephora, thank you very much!
We work ourselves to death
because of you guys.
Hang on,
what makes you think we don't?
That's typical of you minions.
You're not allowed a life!
You're not a nice guy after all,
Mr. Thank you Sorry.
Don't take pictures of the mess.
OK, sorry.
You did it again!
It's a tic.
Hadn't you realized?
Quit apologizing for living.
Self-confidence isn't a state of mind,
it's a physical posture.
When you enter a room,
look straight ahead,
into the distance,
not at your feet.
Hold yourself straight.
Be receptive, relaxed.
The same goes for dancing.
If you don't know what to do,
tell us a story.
What did you just say?
I put a spell on you.
Let's take a photo here.
The lighting's lousy in there.
Queens always seem
to be going somewhere.
We're not. We just like strutting.
Come on, grand dame!
You can't imagine how
these heels crush my toes.
You were beautiful tonight.
Or handsome. I'm not sure...
As you like.
- I have to...
- Wait.
I have to get undressed.
Hang on!
It's like you're peeling a banana.
True.
Give me a hand, will you?
Sure.
Keep still.
Thanks.
Come here.
Hang on, sweetie.
I stink like a nanny goat.
That's OK.
Hang on.
Beware,
if you sleep with a queen,
you wake up with a glittery crotch.
I have to remove my makeup.
Are you OK?
Yeah, fine.
I've got to get used to it.
You could always join your girlfriend
before you get found out.
I still don't have breasts.
Gabriela!
Explain about PEP.
My Spanish is rusty.
OK.
She's a scream!
Never for fellatio.
She does it au naturel.
All right.
Baptiste!
Fetch me a coffee, please.
OK.
Excuse me.
With the trans we get here...
Those with syphilis need a jab
in their buttocks,
but some have silicon.
So? Are you afraid of plastic?
I can't do IM injections
when there's silicon.
It's dangerous for the guys.
For the girls!
When you see a girl,
you say "she".
Hey Jerrie, easy there!
Hugo gives the injections here.
So drop the vocab lesson!
No way! I'm sorry.
Why can't he treat her
if she has silicon in her butt?
Calm down.
He'll learn about silicon,
you'll learn patient relation skills.
What does that mean?
You're kind of fierce sometimes.
For sure!
It isn't easy.
Working with you lot was hard at first.
When I saw you, I thought,
"The circus has come to town!"
The circus?
You're happy for us
to clown around outside
while you sit on your ass
filling in forms!
What's wrong?
I'm sick of this bullshit!
"Don't say "gay", say "MSM"."
But a trans girl is a he?
All to tick your fucking boxes.
It's just the opposite.
We ask people who they sleep with.
They don't have to define themselves
as straight, gay, or whatever.
"Or whatever!"
Like your guy.
He's MSM too.
Hey, that's enough!
Fucking hell.
Shut it, you!
Hang on a minute.
Is it true you sleep with guys now?
No, of course I don't.
Just Cookie, huh?
Think I'm blind?
- Answer me!
- No. I don't know...
- It was the drink talking.
- Yeah, right!
Listen...
Our relationship's on the skids!
It's not surprising.
We're worn out, you never stop...
It's nothing to do with that.
It has been for a while,
and you know it.
Let go, you bastard!
Let go!
Faggot!
Are you OK?
Can you hear me?
I'll help you up.
It's OK.
Cookie, it's OK.
My bag is just full of condoms!
Let's see.
Don't touch me, I'm positive.
It's fine, don't worry.
Didn't you learn anything
in our AIDS education class?
Call a taxi.
It'll be OK.
What is that?
Unbelievable!
Shut it.
What the fuck?
- Here.
- Thanks.
I look a wreck.
This is what I fucking dread
every time we're in drag
ending up in ER.
You're afraid you'll be attacked?
Just look at me.
I feel so ridiculous.
- How much?
- You can't be serious!
Drop it.
What a fucked up world!
Sorry about Jerrie.
Will you be OK?
Please let us win this contest
and get away from all this.
Are you coming with us?
We'll be staying with my uncle.
I don't know.
I've got work.
I really don't know.
You know,
I'm not sure I can wait for you.
The category is:
Joan the Maid back from battle!
Shit. How do you feel, hon?
Stitched up!
The bastards removed my makeup.
We can thank Dr. Quinn here.
- Thanks.
- Don't mention it.
Shall we go?
Where are we at, Baptiste?
Where are we at?
Be honest.
What's going on with Cookie?
I don't know.
We're together by choice
not by obligation, you know.
You seem to have forgotten.
What is it you want?
I know I love you.
Maybe it isn't enough.
Don't say stuff like that.
I'll be around more,
here for you more.
We can...
But you always have been.
You're already here for me.
Try telling me what you want, for once.
Do you think
there are things
you need to experience?
So what's wrong?
I slept with Hugo.
The intern?
How was it?
He was really there.
I'll be gone for three days,
for family reasons.
My sister...
Anyway.
I've revised your schedules.
They're up here.
Stick to the same strategy.
While I'm away,
Nawal is in charge.
Be careful, girl!
Cookie! Here.
Leave it to me,
I'm a pro at Tetris.
Yeah, at fitting big things
into tiny spaces!
What is it, kitten?
Would you rather spend
the night with me?
Recognize the tactful Gueule de Nuit?
Oh yeah, you had paper hair!
Be nice to him,
his girlfriend stitched me up.
His girlfriend?
Good job, Cookie,
another great choice!
Iris, manage the coke
and spare us your remarks.
Right.
This is Kiara Bolt.
You've already met.
They're my favorite.
The Marguerite Duras of drag!
- Always writing.
- Will you tell me their real names?
Those are their real names.
Are you with Quentin?
I'm with the girls.
I'm doing the pictures
for their contest.
Right.
What about work?
It's just for three days.
Fuck off, you weirdos!
Oh yeah?
Shut your mouth!
Hey, sweetie!
Come on!
Security!
Cut your engine.
See you in hell!
You do look smart!
You like it?
I'm going shopping.
Want to come along?
What's that?
Gucci meets hardware store?
If the average is 16cm...
- Too short for me, hon.
- It's an average!
Then I've swallowed 9km of cock
in my life so far.
9km?
That's the diameter of Paris!
You're ready for the NYC marathon!
We need photos of the show, OK?
Sorry.
And your inner camera is
the difference between your self-image
and what you really look like.
It's 4am, and you look
like a girl who's run a triathlon
but your inner voice
calls you Kate Moss!
You take what you find.
Let's be honest,
a drag queen in a gay bar
has no chance of picking up.
Apart from that straight guy
who's either wasted or confused!
So you take him home.
It's risky though.
You're more likely to puke
than to come in his mouth.
If you take Marilyn home
and end up fucking Frankenstein,
you'd better have a few grams
of alcohol in your blood!
Shots all round!
- Kitten, you're in the way.
- Sorry.
It's your sister!
Tuck your cock in!
Do you suck dick?
Cheers, guys!
Baptiste, you OK?
Can you hear me?
- They're just assholes.
- There are assholes everywhere!
Like those guys at your hostel.
It makes me want to...
Knock yourself out
on their elbows too?
Cut that out!
The poor guy stuck up for us.
I'm sorry, kitten.
Right, here's to Martigues!
To Martigues!
And Kiara!
Welcome to the house, honey.
That was some baptism!
It was your first time?
With these girls.
I've written something.
Give them a chance!
"My chameleon sisters,
"ally and enemy."
"Innocent children,
"chosen family,"
"you are witnesses of a dawn,
of a new day for me."
Thanks to those gropers,
it was a baptism of fire!
With your nails and heels,
you're always armed.
Go for the eyes and the balls!
We know the sensitive spots.
You too, Baptiste,
you know the sensitive spots!
She's wasted again.
It's OK, I can handle this.
What do you want to know, darling?
You know you like guys.
- What's your question?
- My question is...
Baptiste, honestly,
how many kilometers of cock?
- Don't answer that.
- Hang on.
22cm.
I'm dead.
I can't even move.
It'll be fine.
Why wouldn't you kiss me
in the hardware store?
I did kiss you.
So
have you and Samia split up?
I don't know.
You know,
I don't have space in my life
for complicated stuff.
Because drag isn't complicated?
Am I really the first?
The first? No way!
I've had loads of guys.
Of course you're the first.
What about you?
Do you often take guys home
when you're in drag?
No.
You're the only one.
I sucked off an Uber driver once,
but that was ages ago.
You make out you're single
in your sketch.
I'm not some wasted guy
you picked up in a bar.
No, but it's funnier that way.
It's a good job
I can still say what I like.
All right.
They do breakfast here.
Maybe we could go around 9.
How about it?
Just the two of us?
OK.
Are you sure you aren't a bit gay?
What is it with you lot?
Who cares!
Give me a break.
This isn't the county road.
We're in St. Mitre.
I'm not the one who grew up here!
Guys, what will you do
if we win 20K each?
Me, I'll get fillers.
Here, here, here, here,
everywhere!
You, Cookie?
I'll quit everything and go far away.
Good riddance!
Sonny!
Uncle. How are you?
He didn't tell us
he had a sugar daddy.
You're just jealous he has a family.
This is Uncle Jean, everyone.
He helped raised me.
Iris, Bobel,
Kiara and Baptiste.
Hello, sir.
Ladies!
Girls!
Quentin told me
you had a bit of set-to.
You can say that again!
I got some arnica,
in case anyone needs it.
Thanks. How kind.
I have a few house calls today
but I'll see you tonight.
OK.
I fixed you some punch.
But don't do anything stupid.
Listen to you!
A beard and a cock,
and you're in love.
And a fucking great garden!
Final position.
Then you pick the bucket.
The bucket?
An audience member
who gets covered in glitter.
Right!
Having a good time?
- What are you up to?
- Going into town.
You can't be late for your comeback!
Hang on!
I'll drive you.
I feel like I'm on Survivor!
Come on!
I've got stage fright.
Stage fright?
Oh, do be quiet!
Good evening!
Isn't this pretty?
Good evening, St. Mitre!
You're not usually this quiet!
They have mulled wine!
Woman of the world!
You're still here?
- Did you see us?
- Yeah, I did.
Come on, let's dance.
Hang on, Quentin.
Who?
I'm Cookie Kunty!
You called three times.
Is everything OK?
Not really, no.
Remember the kid
we saw with Bobel?
Yes.
He came for his results.
He was pleased to see me.
We had a laugh.
Then I had to tell him
he was HIV-positive.
Can you imagine?
72 hours too late for PEP.
I'm sorry, Samia.
Where are you at, Baptiste?
You have to make your mind up.
I have my life to live too.
What the hell did they get up to?
Search me.
Look at Cookie!
That's enough now.
Time for a rinse.
No, time to stop.
OK, what's wrong?
I'm sorry but I left my girlfriend
and my job to be here.
Want a medal?
- What is this?
- What was that performance?
There's no room in your life
for anything but drag.
When I drag up,
I'm totally into it.
- I don't owe you an explanation!
- That was drag?
And worthy of Cookie?
Who are you to say
what's worthy of me?
A guy who's landed himself in it
to spend time with you.
Is it so hard to spend 24 hours
without dragging up?
Hey, Quentin...
Why am I here anyway?
Just to watch you do your show?
Am I only your guy
when you're a boy?
- I don't have time for this!
- You don't?
You're like Bobel.
You drag up to forget
how sordid your life is!
That's better!
Have you only just met?
It's all a bit confusing.
He can be hard.
He was seven when he came to me.
And fatherless.
My sister wasn't able
to look after him properly.
He settled down here.
But he has reasons to be angry.
He scared me earlier.
I know.
Just a sec.
Here.
He did that when he was 15.
All I know is,
he's happier now he has Cookie.
He says...
Cookie and Quentin
are one and the same.
But
he invites me then ignores me.
I just don't get it.
If you want him to say
he needs you, go whistle.
That said,
you're the first boy
he's introduced me to.
Do you care about him?
Voyeur.
Think I didn't hear you
with your camera?
Are you staying a while?
Tomorrow anyway.
I'm glad you're here.
Oh fuck!
The Lyon team has posted a story.
Look, they're gonna slay us.
Plus La Grande Dame is on the jury.
Do many girls do drag?
Of course.
Girls, boys, pharmacists...
And trannies!
Everyone's welcome
in the queendom of drag!
Non-binary folk too.
You thought you'd seen everything?
Not yet, you haven't!
Are you OK?
I bet I won't even get
to wear the frock I made.
Relax!
Cookie puts her life
into every competition.
I'll go get ready.
See you later.
The divas need some peace and quiet.
Want to come for a walk?
Sure. Great idea.
Let's go.
They love getting worked up.
It's how they see the world.
When everything's fine, they panic.
But Cookie has no worries now,
with her Nyx deal.
What?
You know, the makeup brand.
They want a queen
to represent them abroad.
You didn't know?
That's why they stress
about their faces.
Like Iris with her Botox.
A face mask is already
a big deal for me.
So forget the injections!
You two don't talk, huh?
We do.
Do you enjoy being with them?
Yes.
They're good queens.
But sometimes I find them
kind of stuck in their thing.
Drag is cool
but there's more to life.
How old are you?
I'm 20.
You know...
Quentin is the only one.
He's lucky.
I love your eyebrows.
Seriously.
We could fix your hair.
What's wrong with it?
I love doing this!
Has it worked?
You're going to look great.
Fuck!
What if it doesn't suit me?
Who cares!
You can reinvent yourself.
It tickles.
I'll add some glitter.
That way you'll really be one of us.
Bapt!
Come here for a second.
Listen, I wanted to say...
To tell the truth,
I didn't like you at first.
But I know I can be
a bit high maintenance.
And actually, it's cool.
- Really.
- Fuck me, girls!
Jerrie's speaking from the heart.
- It's a miracle!
- Girl, are you on MD?
I'm just happy to be here.
We're happy too, Biboo!
There's too much love in here!
Classy, huh?
What's this?
It's a photo of me as a guy!
You can't post stuff
without asking us first.
Why didn't you tag us?
I didn't want to use you to get views.
That isn't how it works!
The top drag agency liked the photo.
Thought no one would notice?
I don't hide.
You see me with my camera.
You asked me to come.
The idea was to photograph us off stage,
not show us without makeup.
Did you think of Kiara?
Their parents don't know they do drag.
I haven't posted anything about them.
Come on, Baptiste!
It's our livelihood,
and you post that stuff!
I see you like that every day.
You're gorgeous,
the pics are great, end of story!
Are you here for me or your project?
I'm here for both.
Yeah.
Drag is my job and my priority.
Yeah, I got that.
- What?
- Your priority.
You kept quiet about your deal!
And your contest...
If you win, what happens to us,
what happens to me?
Let me know when you're performing,
if it's a show or you're backstage,
if I can take a photo.
In fact, your life is one big act!
Give it up for the House of Utopia!
Good evening, Drag Olympus!
Leave that to me.
What are you doing?
There's loads left.
That's why I want to talk to you
about failure tonight.
To fail massively,
you need to aim high!
Like declare your undying love
and get their name wrong.
For a big fat failure,
you need a beautiful promise.
To illustrate this,
I'll pick one of you.
I need a guy who's a bit lost,
the dregs maybe.
You, for instance!
The cardboard pharaoh.
What's your name? Marcel?
No! His name's Baptiste.
Let's give him a cheer!
With that hair and makeup,
I've picked the perfect person
to talk about failures in life.
Tell me, sweetie,
have you seen the movie Carrie?
No.
Life is like a catwalk.
If you stumble, bounce back!
That's how you turn a walk of shame
into a walk of fame.
Your turn.
Go on!
The category is:
Foal separated from its placenta.
Help the poor boy, girls.
The bottom line is this:
A success is simply a failure
followed by a rebound.
And the rest is glitter!
Ladies and gentlemen, Baptiste!
Baptiste!
Drag backstage?
- That's your Insta, right?
- Yes.
I liked every pic,
even Cookie's ass.
Your work is fabulous.
We never see the girls like that.
And it's obvious from
the way you shoot them
that you love them.
How about photographing the final?
I don't know.
It's a deal!
Write to me.
What's your name?
Javel Habibi.
What happened?
I screwed up.
I really screwed up.
What do we do now?
You were right.
I'll move out.
Baptiste.
May I have a word?
It's willful misconduct.
You were caught on camera.
It isn't stealing.
You're supposed to sell them.
I say your figures are poor,
and you take off for the weekend!
I know.
As for the rest...
Your sister is sick, huh?
Did you give 100 percent?
- No.
- So we agree then?
Sure you don't want them?
What'll I do with them
in a tiny studio?
You have them.
For my skylight?
- How's the thesis going?
- OK.
And you?
I've got my first photo job.
Great.
Do you still see Quentin?
So you're not leaving
for someone else.
Right, it's ridiculous
but...
Don't laugh.
I met you on a Saturday night.
And threw at your silhouette.
A handful of colorful spices.
My aim was clear.
To bewitch you.
While remaining.
Free-me and free-you.
Because the king of love.
No longer needs a slave.
So long, so long, night.
So long, sadness.
So long, tears.
I am not the man you once knew
I'm not the same anymore.
O beautiful child.
Who cried so many tears.
So long, it's over.
So long, tears.
So long, night.
Hello, handsome!
What fucking kept you?
Nice camera!
You're a real photographer.
Come on, let's go in.
It took forever to get here.
You didn't have to come.
I did too!
I know half the Belgian team.
And I couldn't miss your first job.
God, it feels like we're reliving
your high school oral!
- I don't need a chaperone, thanks.
- Yeah, right!
You came?
Is there a scooter out front?
Fuck, I need my wig!
Hello? Yes.
That's Kiara.
Have you made up with Kikoo?
It's Cookie.
No.
You're impossible.
Quit bullshitting around!
Just go talk to her.
Can we go backstage with your pass?
I'm here for work.
It's my big break.
Meeting someone you love
isn't important?
Don't you start!
She's going abroad.
There's nothing I can do.
You can't be serious!
It's a once-in-a-lifetime thing.
Keep it down, OK?
I don't know if I love her.
Oh my, oh my, oh my,
freaky sisters,
what a final!
I don't know about you
but I've been wowed and wooed tonight!
Let's be honest,
we've suffered along the way.
We have been hurt,
insulted and roughed up.
But we've turned that hurt
into strength!
I can't hear you.
Express your joy!
Without further ado,
please give a warm welcome
to tonight's French team:
Gueule de Nuit, Kiara Bolt,
Jerrie FK, and Cookie Kunty!
Good evening, Drag Olympus!
What's her name?
That's Jerrie.
Before we do our first number,
we need a volunteer.
You there?
You? You? You?
No, not you!
Jerrie!
Any of you?
- Jerrie!
- Shut up.
Security!
Baptiste is here!
Let go of me!
Hey, let go of me!
She's desperate!
Jerrie, Baptiste is here.
How about you?
Come on!
Let's give him a cheer!
Come on!
You're Baptiste, are you?
Give Baptiste a big hand!
Without further ado...
Cookie Kunty!
Hello, children!
Baptiste, right?
Have you ever seen Carrie?
Do you remember the ending?
Yes.
Would you like to say more?
Come on, Baptiste!
Allow me to introduce
the most beautiful girl
and the sweetest of boys.
When I discovered drag,
I didn't realize I'd fall
for Ronald McDonald.
It's hard work.
With her and him,
we're three at home.
You have to appeal to
two radically different people.
How can you appeal
to both Scarlett Johansson
and Voldemort?
On your first night out
with a drag queen,
you think, "Fantastic",
"I'm going home with Jessica Rabbit."
And five hours later,
you're still in the smoking room
while she takes selfies
with some random asshole.
While you wait,
you're the Invisible Man.
You hold her bag.
She looks at you.
Her smile vanishes.
"Sweetie, my feet hurt.
Give me a ciggy."
When you finally get home...
"This is it,
we're going to make love."
"Wait, sweetie.
I'll just remove my wig, my nails,"
"my breasts, my pantyhose,
my hips and my life."
Then there are the nights
when you'd like a romantic meal
but your boyfriend has something
really important to do:
Detangle a wig!
Who thinks,
at 5am on a school night,
detangling is more important
than giving head?
But you've no time to get bored.
You fall asleep with a boy
who is the fairest princess.
So anything is possible.
What's fascinating is,
when you're with her,
you miss him.
That's when you realize that she
is just a part of him.
You shot through my life like a comet.
And I miss you.
I miss you too.
Kiss!
Oh no, my coil's in a twist!
Well?
They won.
Oh honey!
That's when you realize that she
is just a part of him.
You shot through my life like a comet.
Where did that come from?
I don't even know what I said.
I felt like breaking out in a song.
I swear.
I came.
- Well done.
- Thanks.
Shall I make coffee?
Come in.
When are you going?
In two weeks.
I had to leave the hostel anyway.
Then again, 20 grand...
We'll try not to spend it all at once.
Jerrie showed me the video.
That was quite a stunt!
You'll become a gif.
I'll go get the croissants.
Thank you.
I really care about you.
I know, sweetie.
I'm not talking to Cookie.
Pain in the ass.
This face isn't waterproof, you know.
Girls, you're stunning.
- Champagne?
- Please!
- Everything OK?
- Yes, fine.
- Congratulations.
- Thanks.
- Want some?
- I'd love some.
- Well done.
- Thanks a lot.
- Everything OK?
- Great.
Cheers!
- All right?
- Fabulous! Thank you.
- Stunning.
- Thanks so much.
Is that for Grindr?
What are you up to?
Changing the music.
Is that OK?
Go ahead.
Jean!
- How are you?
- Fine, thanks.
Champagne?
- Thanks for coming.
- It's superb.
Absolutely superb.
All the same,
that one's still my favorite.
My very first.
You're not in touch anymore?
Not really, no.
- Right.
- That's life.
OK.
- You OK?
- Great. How about you?
I'm OK.
It's a bit overwhelming.
You should be proud of yourself.
Well done!
What's that?
What's that?
Look.