Upgraded (2024) Movie Script

[woman] Look at that.
I mean, really, look at that.
Painted in 1914
by Hilma af Klint.
She wanted to evoke
the feeling of contradiction.
Some say the vertical line
breaking the canvas
symbolizes where
opposite forces meet,
the union necessary
for creation.
The dualities
of lightness and darkness,
the masculine and feminine,
life and death.
And, you know,
as abstract as it may seem,
this is actually a depiction
of a swan.
But what do you see?
What do you feel?
When my boss sees this work,
she feels envy
because some lucky prick at
Sotheby's sold his collection
for more money
than you could ever imagine.
But, me, when I see it,
I mean, the feeling
is impossible to describe.
When I see it, I feel...
What the fuck
are you talking about?
- What?
- She's talking about the print.
I'm talking to both of you
about the painting.
- I love it. I love the red.
- Hmm.
- It's great.
- The red's nice.
The red, huh?
You know what I feel when I look at it?
I feel, you don't live here.
So, it's a little weird
that you're hanging art
on our walls.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know?
I hear you. It's just that, you
know, since I'm sleeping here,
I thought I'd bring a little
culture into your home.
- Culture? That's a circle.
- Ronnie, it's nice.
It's not nice and I'm concerned
that your sister's trying
to fully move in.
See, this is exactly
what I'm saying.
What a unique experience
you're having with the painting.
- Thank you for sharing.
- Today's a big day for Ana, OK?
They're doing one
of those big auctions.
OK. Good luck
selling your shapes.
Those shapes, Ronnie,
are worth millions of dollars.
Tens of millions, in fact.
And today, some of the biggest
private art collectors
in all the world
are gonna be there,
and I'm gonna be there with them
in the middle of it all.
That is so great. Are you
gonna get a piece of the action?
Because that would be wonderful.
No, I'm not, because
only brokers collect commission,
which is why I'm on your futon.
But if I wanna work
at a top art gallery,
I gotta get
a good recommendation,
and there's no better
than Claire Dupont, trust me.
I don't think you guys understand
how lucky I am
just to be in
Erwins's training program.
I don't think you understand how lucky you
- to be living in this house.
- [sister] Ronnie!
What? She can stay here
but I can't get a dog?
She's not a dog, she's
my sister. There's a difference.
Yeah. You can have sex
in front of a dog.
You can't have sex in front
of a dog. Shut your mouth!
It's been three months.
My nutsack looks like a...
Your nutsack looks fine.
Ana, listen, I hate to agree
with him at all,
but he's got a little bit
of a point.
We just have to come up
with a plan,
because this just feels
like it's not sustainable.
I hear that. It's just that,
you know, New York is expensive,
and my credit is shit.
- I'll be out of here soon.
- Yeah.
We were talking.
It might be a good idea
if you go back to Florida
and join the navy.
- Ronnie, not again!
- I'm not moving back to Florida.
It's great. You get to travel,
they have dental, Maverick.
They'll even pay for you
to go back to school.
I went to school, twice.
I have a master's degree
in art history.
And I have a master's
in kung fu movies,
- but it doesn't pay the bills.
- What bills?
Your apartment's
been rent-controlled
since your grandma moved in
in, like, 1957 or some shit.
My grandma died here.
My mom died here.
And, by God, your sister and I
are gonna die here.
You know who's not
gonna die here? You.
Cause it's not your house.
- It's our house.
- Oh, babe.
"Oh, babe"?
Did you hear what he said?
It was romantic.
He's a romantic guy.
- Jesus Christ!
- [laughs]
For the record,
a degree in art history
is actually very useful.
Useful? For what?
You're sleeping on a couch.
First of all, that is not
a couch, it's a futon.
This is not a house,
it's a room.
And that is not a circle,
it's a swan.
["Chaise Longue" by Wet Leg]
Do you see a swan?
- No, I don't see a swan.
- Thank God.
Mummy, Daddy, look at me
I went to school
and I got a degree
All my friends call it
the big D
I went to school
and I got the big D
I got the big D
I got the big D
I got the big D
I went to school
and I got the big D
On the chaise longue,
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue
All day long
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue,
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue
All day long
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue
On the chaise longue,
on the chaise longue
All day long
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue,
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue
All day long
on the chaise longue
All day long, all day long
on the chaise longue
All day long, all day long
on the chaise longue
All day long, all day long
on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue
All day long
on the chaise longue
[gasps] Ana.
You look so, so good.
- You look so, so good.
- I know, know, know.
Today's the day, Amy.
It's auction day.
It's time to get noticed.
- It's time to...
- [gasps]
- What?
- [gasps]
- What are you looking at?
- It's not good.
[Ana] What's back there? What?
It's nothing, right? Right?
It's not like we work for
a sociopathic perfectionist.
- Oh, God.
- It's gonna be OK.
It's gonna be OK.
[Claire] Good morning, everyone.
Mm-hmm. Auction day.
Erwins's clients are about
to walk through that door,
spend millions of dollars
on a collection
that I found, I curated
and I brought under this roof.
When they enter,
I will not allow them to see
anything less than perfection.
That includes your appearances.
You, you, you.
Back of the house. Now go hide
before anyone sees you.
For the rest of you,
in the auction room.
- Let's get to work.
- Yes.
You. What's your name?
Me? Um, Ana. Ana Santos.
What's that massive oil spill
on the back of your shirt?
It's nothing.
Are you implying
I'm hallucinating?
No! No, sorry.
Um, it must've happened
on the train.
Which department are you in?
Uh, I just finished up
my rotation in cataloguing,
and I've been moved up
to auctions,
so you're my new boss.
We'll see how long that lasts.
Oh, you, short, weird girl,
give her your jacket.
The stain's depressing me.
Just cover it up.
There you go.
Why would you put that
on your body permanently?
- I just love art.
- Give her the jacket back.
You two will be in charge
of something
where you're less visible.
[woman] All right, let's go.
You heard her.
Today was gonna be
my first day in there.
Becoming indispensable,
forging a future,
making a name for myself.
Sorry. Catalogue?
Have a great day.
Let us know
if you need anything.
This is so sad.
I mean, Claire's right.
She just couldn't,
in good faith,
let you in there
covered in whatever that is.
Come on, Suzette. Covered?
It's barely a spot.
You can't even notice it.
Just keep your mouth shut
and your eyes open.
Although, I'm sure you're both
used to doing more the opposite.
- Bye.
- Did she just...
Yes. She just implied
that we suck a lot of...
Back at your desks.
Oh. We're not staying
for the auction?
Oh, yes, you are.
Just, ta-ta-ta.
- [man] Welcome, ladies and gentlemen.
- Back at your desks.
I just don't understand
how you can become
a respected artist
and still be alive, you know?
[Ana] I don't understand
how I'm gonna start a gallery.
Even the smallest space I looked
at is, like, ten grand a month.
And you don't have diddly-squat
to your name
apart from a great personality
and a bucket full of dreams,
my friend.
Wonder if Claire was ever broke.
Don't let the fancy accent
fool you.
I heard that she's from
Minnetonka, Minnesota.
- What, wait?
- [Amy] I know. Crazy.
Anyway, if all the greatest
artists are dead and in museums,
then what does that make me?
- Wait, am I a ghost?
- [Ana] Amy.
- [gasps]
- Look.
Amarillo is acrylic.
It says "oil on wood."
It should say "acrylic on wood."
- You sure?
- It's a Carmen Herrera.
I think I know
what I'm talking about.
I think I need to go in there.
Claire should know about this.
Hmm, I feel like you're trying
to get into a place
that you've specifically
been told not to.
I think I'm gonna do it.
- I don't think you should.
- I'm gonna.
- I think it's a really bad idea.
- I'm going in.
- Don't leave.
- This is how I get in.
When Claire kills you,
I will tell your story.
And continuing on, ladies and
gentlemen, we're at $2,400,000.
At 2,400,000, 2,500,000,
2,600,000 with the gentleman.
the lady's bid near me.
- Any advance above...?
- What do you think you're doing?
I need to talk to Claire.
- There's been a mistake.
- Are you insane?
If you don't turn around
right now,
the next person
you'll be talking to is an EMT.
Why is this shit-covered maniac
- in Claire's auction room?
- Jesus.
- Can't help you now.
- There's been a mistake.
That's impossible. Which item?
No time. Let me talk to Claire.
[indistinct whispering]
What the fuck is going on?
There's been a mistake
in the catalogue.
Item number 17 is mislabelled.
It should say "acrylic on wood."
[exhales deeply]
If you're wrong,
you're finished.
- I'm not.
- Leave quietly, now.
- Cover that up. Go.
- OK.
Amarillo "Dos",
painted in 1971, oil on wood.
Excuse me, Reggie.
Excuse me.
[whispering] Acrylic on wood.
Uh, small typo.
It's acrylic on wood, not oil.
And, with that,
we can start the bidding...
Your coffee, sir.
Hmm. A little typo.
A little typo?
There are no little typos.
There are only
huge fucking mistakes.
Has everyone
recently dropped acid?
How long have we had
these catalogues? Six days.
Reginald, the finest auctioneer
in New York, he can't speak.
He's so deeply embarrassed.
This could have ruined
his reputation,
Erwins's reputation
and my reputation.
Who is responsible?
It's inevitable. Who did it?
Come on.
What's your name?
Uh, Buh... Buh...
- Uh, Buh...
- Bobby? Bronson?
Blake? Blair?
Basil? Benedict?
Billy. Yeah. Billy.
Oh, it is so perfect.
Because nothing
says sophistication
quite like the name Billy.
So, Billy, you understand
that Carmen Herrera's "Dos"
was valued at one million dollars?
[Billy] Uh-huh.
If you wanted to spend
a million dollars on a painting,
and the person selling it to you
didn't even know
what kind of paint was used,
how would you feel?
You'd feel a little bit like
Erwins Auction House doesn't
know what the fuck it's doing.
So, Billy, today's the day
for you to lay down
in the grave
that was your career,
and just dissolve.
There's not an auction house
on this planet
that will hire you
after the emails
I'm about to send out.
So, it's your retirement party.
OK, hooray.
Get him some champagne.
Happy retirement.
Drink it.
- Good.
- [gulps]
Done. Please, go. Go. Done. Now.
Ana Santos.
Ana. Thank you
for doing the bare minimum
that this job requires,
which is more than most today.
Well done.
Well done! Well done!
Well done! Well done!
Here's to the bare minimum!
- Go on, Ana!
- [cheering]
What's wrong?
Impressing Claire earlier
was the biggest triumph.
So what?
Instead of pay cheques,
I got a "well done."
I can't pay rent
with "well done."
No, you can't.
You have to pay rent with money.
Amy, if... If this program
doesn't work out,
that's it. I'm gonna have
to go back to Tampa.
Sell paintings
of boats to senior citizens.
Can I crash at your place later?
Oh, honey, I have company later.
[keys rattle]
[door squeaks]
[door closes loudly]
[Ronnie] Son of a bitch. Again!
[sister] Shh!
[Ronnie] Why are you
shushing me?
[sister] Because you're being
so loud.
[Ronnie mutters indistinctly]
- [thud]
- [Ronnie] Are you kidding me?
[sister] Shh!
- [Ronnie] I can't do this.
- [sister] Shh!
[sister] Now I'm up.
[Ronnie] Because
she fee-fi-fo-fummed
into the apartment.
- [birds tweet]
- [phone rings]
[Ronnie] Oh, goddamn it!
[Ronnie] What type of baboon
calls at seven in the morning?
Hello, who is this?
[Claire] Hello?
Hello? Is the call dropped?
- Are you there?
- Uh, no. Sorry about that.
Um, hi. May I ask
who's speaking, please?
It's Claire.
- I'm sorry?
- It's your boss.
- Hmm?
- Hi.
Yeah, no.
Um, I know who you are.
Well, I would assume.
- [Ronnie mutters indistinctly]
- Shh!
- Are you busy?
- Shh!
No. Um, no, I'm not.
Sorry. What's up?
- "What's up?"
- No, no. Sorry.
I mean, uh, how can I help?
Something came up last minute
at our London office.
I'm going to be very busy.
I need an extra assistant.
So, you need me
to come to London?
Is your passport valid?
Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yep.
So, you can come to London.
Um, yeah. Yeah, sure.
I mean, of course. Great.
- Uh, when?
- Now.
You should leave
for the airport immediately.
Don't be late. Suzette
is sending you the details.
- Goodbye.
- Uh, bye.
I just got invited to go
to London with Claire Dupont.
This is what you wanted, right?
- Yeah!
- Yes!
[cheering and laughter]
I'm going to London
with Claire Dupont!
Yes, hold on.
I'll help you pack.
I'm going to London
with Claire Dupont!
You need to get all your things
into your bag.
You don't know how long
you'll be there.
I always knew
you were gonna be a big deal.
That's why I let you stay here
for so long. Let me help you.
Thanks, Ronnie. You know
I'm only gone for a few days?
Don't jinx it. Uh, I need you
to remember something.
- London ain't New York. OK?
- Right. Yeah.
I don't want you
going over there
getting seduced by their
big clocks and pirate accents.
Listen here,
you're a New Yorker now,
through and through.
Even if you don't have
a place to stay.
And being a New Yorker means
that you fight every single day,
no matter what comes at you, OK?
And remember, nothing is real,
if you don't believe
in who you are.
That's really sweet, Ronnie.
Rocky Balboa said that.
Isn't he from Philly?
He moved there from Brooklyn.
I love you.
- I love you.
- Yeah.
- I love you, Viv.
- You've got this.
- You got this.
- Ronnie.
Hold on one second, sweetheart.
- There you go. Put that on.
- Thank you.
You're welcome.
- Ah, OK.
- Here you go.
- There you go.
- Bye, guys.
Text us when
you're through security.
- I will, I will, I will.
- Love you. Bye!
- Get out of my house.
- Mwah.
[both laugh]
- Hi.
- Why don't you have a cart?
Cart? A cart! Yes.
So sorry.
I'll meet you guys inside.
Hello. Give me your passport.
We're checking in.
Can you hurry up?
We don't have all day.
There you go.
[snorts] Oh, my God,
this photo's tragic.
- [laughs]
- So cute.
Oh. Not really
a big traveller, hmm?
I've only ever had to use it
once for study abroad.
Aw. This will be so cool
for you, then.
Do you wanna
place your bags up here, please?
- Yep.
- Put the luggage up here.
This is where
they weigh the bags
to make sure
they aren't too heavy.
Thank you, Renee.
Oh, my God.
What is taking so long?
The whole point of gold status
is efficiency. Hmm!
Oh, no, no, no.
You're not on this flight.
I'm not travelling
with you guys?
Our flight was full,
so I put you on one that leaves
in four hours, in economy.
Get some sleep. We're gonna need
you to hit the ground running.
Yeah. Claire doesn't believe
in jet lag.
Um, why did you guys have me
get here so early?
To help with the bags, silly.
Enjoy your flight.
Hmm, thanks.
You're between me
and my first martini.
[laughs] Unwise.
Uh, is there an on switch
for you?
Oh, um, my flight doesn't leave
for another few hours, so...
- Fully booked out.
- Yeah.
Oh, really?
Why are you here so early?
In case you needed help
with bags or holding things.
Oh, OK. Strong choice.
Way to kiss ass. La forza!
Still, I expect you in action
first thing in the morning.
None of this jet-lag bullshit.
I'll create an email account and
call-forwarding to her phone.
Renee, spare me the details.
Let's move.
Welcome to being attached
to your phone 24/7.
London, so exciting.
See you there.
I don't know how you put up
with those three.
I'm going to England
for the first time in my life.
If I have to wait,
that's what I'll do.
- Can I see your passport?
- Yeah.
Least amount of legroom
and next to the toilet?
Oh, someone knows
how to ruin a transatlantic.
You're gonna need your rest.
The best place to wait
is in the first-class lounge.
[laughs] Well, unless
that computer can pay off
years of student loan debt...
You just been upgraded.
What? Why?
I only deal with assholes
a couple of times a day.
Seems like you need to
all the time.
First class?
I've never been in first class.
This is incredible.
Thank you so much.
I don't even know what to say.
Just got upgraded. [laughs]
Told you it wasn't a myth.
- Hi, welcome to the lounge.
- Hi. Thank you.
We're gonna put you in the spa,
get you a nice long massage.
And then afterwards,
maybe some fun treatments.
And then, we will gladly
send you off with a Bloody Mary.
Ooh, yes, please,
to all of that.
- Hey.
- How are you?
The spa's lovely.
Yeah, you should try it.
[phone rings]
[woman] I'm trying to reach
Claire Dupont. Is this Suzette?
No. Uh, sorry,
this is Ana, her third.
Claire's on a flight right now,
um, but how can I help?
I need a London address
for the delivery.
Address? Uh, sorry, one
second. Let me just check...
- Oh!
- Oh.
- [Ana gasps]
- [sighs]
Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God!
- [English accent] Yeah. Uh...
- And they're suede.
- Yeah.
They're suede.
- It's fine. Don't worry.
- Why don't you come with me?
- Can I pay for your dry-cleaning?
- No, it's fine.
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
[woman] Hello?
Are you still there? Hello?
Miss Santos,
lovely to have you on board.
Care for a champagne to start?
I would, thank you.
[camera clicks]
- [man] Hello.
- Hi.
Robes and God knows
how many different facial creams
she had on. One second, sorry.
[gasps] Shit.
Bruv, she was stomping
around the lounge,
not looking where she's going.
She throws her drink all over
me, face is glued to her phone.
Not a care in the world. Yeah,
she's probably an alcoholic.
Hmm. That's a good idea.
OK, bye. Sorry.
Can I offer sir anything?
Wine, beer, Bloody Mary?
If you want a Bloody Mary,
you can wring out my jacket.
You'd probably get
a few glasses out of it.
Um, but, no.
Two glasses of champagne.
Two champagnes? Of course, sir.
Thank you. You didn't want
anything else, did you?
No, I'm good, thank you.
- [man] You sure?
- Mm-hmm.
- Bloody Mary maybe?
- No, never really liked them.
Oh, right.
Well, I apologize then,
because I smell like
I'm wearing a cologne by V8.
I thought that was on purpose.
I'm William, by the way.
Ana. It's a pleasure
to meet you, Ana.
What brings you to London?
Uh, work.
Are you headed back home?
What gave it away?
Sophisticated English charm?
[laughs] Yeah, that must be it.
But, no, I'm actually, uh...
I was at a job interview
in New York.
Now I'm on my way back
to see my mum for her birthday.
OK. You get points back
for that.
Points? I didn't realise
we were playing a game.
- What do I get if I win?
- A Bloody Mary.
Right. Well, in that case,
I'll stop trying to score.
What... What kind of work
brings you over to England then?
I work for an auction house
here in the city,
and our London branch
has called in
the director of the New York
office to save the day.
- The director?
- Mm-hmm.
Wow, that's...
That's impressive.
- Yeah, I guess.
- Forgive me for this.
You seem a bit young
to be the director.
What? Do you get that a lot?
Yeah. Yeah, actually, I do.
Well, it's probably
cause I'm, like,
the youngest director
in company history.
- Wow.
- Yeah.
Jesus, wow.
Lucky you. Good person to know.
I worked very hard for it, Will.
Can I call you Will?
- [William laughs]
- [Ana] Am I wrong though?
- I can't believe you said that.
- You're evil.
Seems like you two
are enjoying yourselves.
Well, that's what you think.
She's been attacking
my livelihood
- for the last half an hour.
- [laughs]
- Shall I get you another round?
- Yeah, go on then.
- Please. Thank you.
- Course, sir.
These are so cute.
Right, no. Look.
The point that
I'm trying to make is,
to do what I do, you have
to interact with art every day.
I'm sorry. How does someone
who works in advertising
- interact with art every day?
- Oh. Don't do this.
Just because you're a swanky
art director from New York,
it doesn't mean you get
to decide what is and isn't art.
Actually, that's exactly
what it means.
Name one meaningful thing
that came from an ad.
- I wouldn't exist without an ad.
- Oh, come on.
OK, well,
I'll just prove it to you.
Um, my mum did a yogurt ad
back in the '90s,
and my dad saw it
and basically chased her down
until she agreed to marry him
and have a kid.
- That's your mom?
- Mm-hmm.
- She's beautiful.
- That's a much nicer description
than what the boys at school
used to say.
So, this is what your
entire existence boils down to?
Your dad getting horny
for raw, Greek yogurt?
If you want to give me an
existential crisis, then, yes,
that's what it comes down to.
- It just goes to show...
- Mm-hmm.
That chance moments can
change the course of your life.
[laughs softly]
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are beginning our descent
into London. The pilot...
Hello. Please put your seat up
for landing.
Yeah. Yeah.
And also, I'm going to need
the salt and pepper shakers
[Ana] What?
The salt and pepper shakers.
- Sorry about that.
- Thank you.
I'm gonna have to have a word
with Immigration when we land.
Do you know where you're going?
Uh, yeah, the Carlson?
- Very swanky.
- Only the best.
- Well, look, if you'd like...
- [woman] Will!
- Will! Will!
- One moment.
Hey! Oh, hello, my darling.
- Hi, Mum.
- Hmm, why are you so smelly?
My goodness.
Look at you. What have you done?
- Yes, can...?
- Why do you look so tired?
- How was the flight?
- Yeah, well, the...
Did you bring
a beautiful woman home
to meet
your rapidly aging mother?
There's hope
for grandchildren yet.
Mum, this is Ana.
She's an American.
It's her first time in London.
She's the one
that spilt Bloody Mary
all over my shoes,
trousers and jacket.
- [Mum] Willy, don't be rude.
- [laughs]
Ana, I would like to introduce
you to my mum, Catherine.
- Pleasure to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
You are gorgeous.
You look like you stepped out
of a Jean Braud painting.
Oh, what a charming thing
to say.
Jean Braud is actually
one of my favourites.
- Mine too.
- Tell me, where are you going?
- Are you waiting for someone?
- Um, no. I'm on my own,
but I'm going to the Carlson.
No, no, no, no, not the Carlson.
That's four streets
from my house.
Do you want a lift?
Oh, no, no, no. I couldn't.
I'll just...
Come with us, please.
That'd be incredibly helpful.
- Grab her bags.
- I... I was going to.
- Hello, sir.
- Hi, Joe, how are you?
I'm all right. Nice to see you.
- This is our new friend Ana.
- Miss Ana.
- Hi.
- Let me get these for you.
Let me just...
I'll take this with me.
Yeah, no worries.
[Catherine] We'll do a stopover
at the Carlson to drop off Ana.
Very nice. You must be doing
very well for yourself.
Actually, what is it
that you do, darling?
God, don't get her started.
I work in the art business.
[Catherine gasps]
That's wonderful.
- [laughs]
- I knew I liked you.
Art business. What a paradox.
Like saying you work
in chocolates or drugs
or phenomenal sex.
Slices of heaven.
But, what specifically?
- Specifically?
- [Catherine] Yes.
Like, like, what I do
- Yes.
- [Ana] God, it's so boring.
Um, I basically source and sell
elite collections
of some of the most exquisite
art from around the world,
to all sorts of...
Oligarchs, warlords,
Clients who think
they understand art
better than I do,
like your charming ad exec
of a son over here.
- What do you do, Catherine?
- You'll never guess.
[chuckles] Well, actually,
I'm a bit of an artist myself.
- An eccentric like you.
- Oh.
Though, in the end, the muses
chose to make me a star
of both stage and screen.
And yogurt ads.
God! Did those
make it stateside?
- I used to love them ads.
- I showed her, Mum.
Oh, you're such a braggart.
So, does that mean
you're famous?
From Dover to the Hebrides,
but my work never translated
to the States, I'm afraid.
I'm too complicated
for their taste.
She's UK famous.
For the best, really.
I wouldn't be comfortable
sharing the same continent
as Florida.
I'm actually from there.
- [laughs]
- Darling, you seem so sane.
Thank you.
OK, so listen, look.
If you're not too busy
being a swanky art director
from New York,
or whatever it is you do,
I would love to take you out.
Show you round the town,
you know?
Only thing is, I might be
really busy with work.
Right, OK.
But we can probably
exchange numbers.
- [Catherine] Ana.
- Oh, for...
You must give me
your phone number.
Sure. Course.
- I want to see her again.
- Nice and subtle.
- Thank you, Mum.
- [chuckles]
There you go.
Now I'll shut up
and let you two sort it.
- Bye, darling.
- Thank you so much for the ride.
[Catherine] Oh, please, darling.
Uh, so I guess I'll just...
You'll get my number
from your mom.
- Yeah, exactly.
- [laughs]
Uh, right, well, I better
get home and get changed.
- I'm so sorry again about the...
- It's all good. I'm joking.
- [laughs]
- All right.
- All right. Bye.
- Bye.
[Claire] OK, let me make myself
very clear.
Has the Brovil collection
been moved and inspected?
I want progress reports.
Ah, finally you're here.
You realise that waiting
makes you all totally worthless.
If I'm going to rearrange
my life to fix your mistake,
then the least you can do
is keep that overly gelled
amphibian away from my office.
Si, ciao.
Don't fall for it.
It's not usually this nice.
Since it's your first time
in London,
please, let me give you
some advice.
Always prepare for rain. Hmm.
Remember that you are here
for work, huh? And not for play.
And, whatever you do, don't try
to outdrink those locals.
Don't sleep with anyone
that looks like Jude Law.
What are you looking at?
- [Ana] Um...
- He comes with the suite.
- Is he, like, a butler?
- He's Percy.
[Percy] Yes, madam?
- No, nothing, Percy.
- Thank you, madam.
Are you moving rooms
or something?
No, going to Rome.
[groans] The Rome office
is just a shitshow.
- Wait, we're going to Rome?
- No, I'm going to Rome.
You and Suzette and Renee,
you will stay here.
You will look after the auction.
I'll be back tomorrow.
- Take notes.
- Yeah, I'll just grab my laptop.
[Claire] At 1pm, there will be
a staff meeting, at Erwins.
[Claire] You will go directly
into the office.
Don't speak to anyone
except Suzette.
She will take you to your desk.
Look. This folder,
it has every piece of art
that I have curated and sold
at Erwins.
- That's a really big folder.
- Is that a problem?
No, no, no, it's incredible.
I want you
to go through every piece
and tell me the current value.
I want hard numbers as leverage.
[Ana] Leverage for what?
Oh, between us,
none of your business.
Right. Totally.
[Claire] OK, go on.
I'm done, I'm done.
Oh, um, should I check in
to the hotel before...?
You're not staying here.
Suzette will have booked you
something more economical.
Also, remind her
about the tickets.
- Tickets. Tickets for what?
- She will know.
Unless you want to be
incredibly late,
I would have left
15 minutes ago.
Yep, leaving.
Shit, shit, shit, shit.
Shit. Excuse me.
Would you happen to have
my laptop bag by any chance?
Let me ask, but I'm quite sure
that's all we had.
Shit. I must've left it
in the car.
- I'm so sorry.
- No, it's OK. Thank you.
- [woman] Thanks.
- Thank you.
- Claire Dupont?
- Upstairs.
I'm here.
I made it.
Wow. Did you navigate
by compass?
I'm not late
for the staff meeting, am I?
OK, this is not something Claire
should ever be associated with.
Clean your shit up. Hide
your suitcase under my desk.
- OK.
- [phone pings]
Let's go.
Remember, no one in there
is your friend other than us.
And we're not even your friends.
Cool. Can't wait.
You all must be wondering
why I've brought you out here
on such short notice.
We have access to a collection
that no one else has,
that only a few people
even had a chance to see.
For God's sakes, Arnold!
Please, what is it?
It's the Brovil collection.
But the Brovil collection has
been locked away for decades.
- What's a Brovil?
- [Arnold] Yes, and now it's not.
Ooh, you must have
talked him round, boss.
No, he's dead.
But his wife has been
spending his fortune
at a rate that frankly
blows my mind.
She needs money
and she needs it now.
This collection will bring the
biggest clients under one roof.
Spread the word discreetly.
I only want whales.
- Should I be taking notes?
- Shh.
Who is the owner?
That will remain on
a need-to-know basis.
To ensure our success,
I've brought in our top brokers.
Gerard, director
of the Paris office,
and Claire Dupont from New York.
Claire is currently on her way
to Rome with another crisis.
But hopefully,
she will be back in time
to celebrate our success,
my friends.
[Arnold] I expect you
to work together as a team.
I expect us to shine.
Now, go for the kill.
Hello. You must be Ana.
Hi. Yeah.
How do you know my name?
Oh, it's a part of my job
to know our up-and-comers.
And I'm told you were
quite a star in New York.
Oh, no. I'm just an assistant.
We all have to start somewhere.
- And I'm sure that you do great.
- Thank you.
But, please, let me know if
you are confused about anything
or if you need a friendly ear,
OK? I know how Claire can be.
- She is a...
- [Suzette] Gerard, hi.
So nice to see you.
Ana, come with us.
We'll show you to your desk.
- [Renee] He's the enemy.
- He's worse than the enemy.
Claire always says, "We compete
with Sotheby's and Christie's,
but we're at war
with Gerard and Paris."
- What did he do?
- What hasn't he done?
He's the guy who sold Van Gogh
to that NFT asshole.
That was him?
He claims he sold art to an
artist who enhanced the piece.
He spray-painted
a smiley face on it.
Exactly. If Gerard ever
steps foot on American soil,
I told my dad
to have him black-bagged
- and sent to Guantanamo.
- What?
[Suzette] So, what's your deal?
Are you hoping to impress Claire
so that she replaces one of us.
If you think that, you've got
another thing coming.
I don't have a deal.
I just wanna graduate
from the training program
- and open a gallery someday.
- A gallery?
All I'm saying is,
I don't wanna steal your jobs.
OK, whatever. When Claire
gets promoted to Arnold's job,
the two of us are going
with her, not you.
Where's Arnold going?
He wants to retire any day now,
and when he does...
Claire will become the first
female chairman of Erwins
and we'll be
right alongside her.
What is this place?
Claire doesn't usually travel
with her third assistant,
so there's not really any space
for you upstairs.
What's that smell?
- Formaldehyde.
- Rotting wood.
England. No offence.
Oh, um, Claire wanted me
to remind you about the tickets.
Oh, God, the Midsummer tickets.
They're sold out for weeks.
It's not gonna happen.
Oh. Lovely.
[Suzette] Mm-hmm.
- So, this is my office?
- Yeah.
- Let me guess. My hotel...
- It's a shithole.
- It's a shithole.
- Enjoy the asbestos.
- [Suzette] Bye.
- Bye.
[phone pings]
Will? Is it recording?
[Will] Yes, Mum, it's recording.
Sweetie, it's Catherine.
I have your laptop.
Listen, sweetheart.
You must come over.
It's quite an impromptu thing,
a few friends.
I'm texting you the address
right now.
See you soon, darling. Kisses.
No. No, no, no, no, no.
[raucous chatter]
[cheering and laughter]
[phone rings]
[Amy] How's it going?
Tell me everything.
OK, so here's my plan.
Go to the party, grab my laptop,
try not to talk to anybody
while I'm there,
grab a cab and come back home
to this shithole.
Or... you drink as many
free drinks as you can.
You hang out with some
fancy British celebrities.
Then you get dicked down by your
own personal Prince William.
Forgetting this laptop
could be the best thing
- that's ever happened to you.
- No, Amy, I lied to him
and his mom
about so many things.
Ah, you lied on an aeroplane.
Besides, do you really think
that she would've given you
her number if she'd known
you were a homeless intern?
No offence.
Personally, I'm jealous of your
Hannah Montana lifestyle.
And plane guy sounds
really, really hot.
What do you think?
You should never be afraid
to put yourself out there.
Bob agrees.
Well, if Bob agrees...
[music playing in distance]
[woman laughs]
No, you're... You're horrible.
You're just horrible.
No, I'm not lying.
Honestly, ask him.
I'll send him home right away.
I love you, Joe.
[gasps] Ana!
- Catherine.
- Ooh.
- [laughs]
- Oh, my God, you look amazing.
- Yes!
- Hi.
- Oh. Come in, come in, come in.
- No, it's fine.
I'll just grab my laptop
and head out.
- I feel really underdressed.
- Oh, you're so pretty.
- So gorgeous. Don't be silly.
- Thank you.
Oh, my God, is it your birthday?
Well, it's not my birthday
till next week.
I just like to start
celebrating early, right?
It's such a shame
to only have the one day.
Yeah, well, happy birthday week.
I wish I brought you something.
But you are my birthday gift.
I'm always having get-togethers.
Last-minute soires help remind
your friends why they adore you.
Thank you. Wow.
This home is incredible.
Please, help yourself
to everything.
I will go
and tell Will you're here.
You made it.
Yeah. Well, didn't wanna
disappoint your mom.
Here I was thinking
you wanted to see me again.
- Why would I wanna see you?
- Dashing good looks.
The fact I've just finished
doing a hundred press-ups
and reading a book
on impressionism.
Press-ups was a nice touch.
Apparently being English
is my only card with you.
Oh, not at all. Free booze,
free food, fancy people.
You've got a full house.
Not sure exactly who's in it
but that's being an actress
for you.
[man] Will! Save me.
This is a disaster.
Michael Faust is holding court
at the bar and I need a refill.
Um, sorry, Ana.
This is Julian Marx.
You're not the Julian Marx,
are you?
The one and only.
Oh, my God. I love your work.
Drunken Wrestlers? I mean, wow.
Erotic and whimsical.
That's really hard to do.
I went to your retrospective
in New York actually.
- Oh, God.
- Oh, wait.
- The retrospective.
- Aren't you supposed to be dead?
This is rather embarrassing,
and you will have to forgive me.
But I thought if I was dead,
I could charge more.
- You did charge more.
- Yes, I did.
And, Ana, you are exactly right.
Most people don't get
the whimsy in my work.
I don't know why. [laughs]
I think it might have something
to do with the erotic aspect.
I think penises
can be very whimsical.
William, my father's dream
has come to life.
I finally love a woman.
- [laughs]
- I love you.
- Let's get drunk.
- Let's get drunk.
Thank you very much.
Leave the fox alone, please.
It's done nothing to you.
I like it
when you're embarrassed.
- [phone rings]
- Imagine this.
- It's really fun for me.
- My whole life, with these two.
- [phone rings]
- And anyone that I...
Excuse me. Sorry.
Hello. Hi, this is Ana Santos.
[Suzette] Yeah, I know who
this is, dipshit. I called you.
- Right, sorry.
- Where are you?
Are you at a party?
Uh, no. Um, I'm not.
I'm at the hotel.
The one you booked at...
The one you booked me at
is, um, right next to a bar.
OK, listen. I've been stuck
for the last 18 hours
trying to get these stupid
"Midsummer Night"
Shakespeare ticket bullshit.
I need you to finish my
other work while I keep trying.
- I'm forwarding the details.
- Oh, I'm kind of busy right now,
dealing with something
for Catherine...
I mean, Claire.
Oh, I'm sorry. Do you not
actually wanna have a job?
You're a third assistant.
Your job is to help me.
No, right. Of course.
Um, happy to help.
What do you need?
I literally just told you.
It's in your inbox.
Now go do it.
- OK. do you wanna...
- [Suzette hangs up]
Ah, there you are.
So, the two of you met
on the plane.
Yeah, we did. Do you
actually know where Will is?
I need him to grab my laptop.
Well, I sent him off
to find absinthe.
A dead painter
can't live without it.
So, are you expecting to do
anything exciting
while you're here?
I don't know. I think
I'll be too busy with work.
That's a shame.
London is such a vibrant city.
Actually, there is something
I wanna do while I'm here.
I'm trying to get tickets
to go see
Midsummer Night's Dream,
but it's completely sold out
and my assistants
have had trouble...
I can just get the tickets
for you myself.
- Catherine!
- Oh.
- Hello.
- Hi.
Oh, good. You've met Ana.
- Oh.
- Isn't she darling?
She is wonderful.
What have we been discussing?
- Well...
- [Will] Julian.
Sorry, but it looks like
we're fresh out of absinthe.
Well, there are now
two problems we have
that I think
you can help us with.
Item number one,
our darling Ana here
can't get tickets to Midsummer
Nighty-Night's Dream.
I'll call Kenneth tomorrow,
dear. It shouldn't be a problem.
I really didn't wanna make
this a thing on your birthday.
Will's office is down the street
from the theatre.
- He can pick them up for you.
- [Will] Oh, can I?
Right, yeah. Of course I will.
No problem at all.
[Julian] Item number two,
I require some absinthe.
[Catherine] I see. Hmm.
I think I may have a bottle
tucked away...
- in the library.
- [laughs]
I'm sorry,
I don't mean to be a buzzkill,
but I have a lot of work
left to do tonight.
- Boo!
- Ooh!
- [laughs] Yeah.
- Oh, and your laptop.
Right, I will grab it and then
I will meet you in the library.
- Yes.
- Oh, I should go with you.
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
- No!
You're staying here
with the fun team,
and we can go together.
Are these originals?
- Uh-huh.
- That's a Renoir.
And they're just hanging in this
room that you never come into?
- [Catherine] Mm.
- Wow.
- That's a Czanne.
- [Catherine] Yeah.
Why don't you ever come in here?
Well, this was Boris's office.
He was my third husband,
and he passed away last year.
Oh, I'm sorry.
He left the paintings to me.
I always felt they were... dark.
No. No, no, no, no, no.
These are not dark at all.
Each one of these paintings
depicts love.
- Love?
- I think it's clear
your husband was a romantic.
He was not. He was Russian.
Well, this collection
tells a story of love.
Really. Like that one,
for example, is unrequited love.
And those three over there,
the nudes, passionate love.
And this woman
by her lover's deathbed,
undying love.
It's all love.
[Catherine] I've never
thought about it that way.
You really know
what you're talking about.
I'd hope so, considering
she does it for a living.
She's a director
of an auction house in New York.
[Julian] The people in charge
just get younger and younger.
- Which house?
- Sorry?
Which house?
Uh, Erwins.
Well, that's incredible.
Really, this is serendipitous.
I recently asked Erwins
to auction these for me.
[Will] Oh, you're selling these?
Oh, that's good. We never
really liked them, did we?
Erwins is auctioning
this collection?
- Yes! Isn't that fun?
- [Julian] So fun!
So, I'm sorry.
Your last name is Brovil?
Cause I just assumed
it was, it was DeLaroche.
Well, technically, it's Brovil.
I just thought DeLaroche
so much more appropriate
to the marquee.
This is the Brovil collection.
I'm confused. You didn't know?
No, I mean...
It's just that I'm...
I'm not exactly the point person
for this collection.
They send me over here
to help with other clients.
It's all a team effort.
Claire Dupont is the one
they've had me working with,
but I'd rather have you.
I'm going to ask Arnold tomorrow
to put you
in charge of my auction.
No! Please, don't.
Please, don't.
It's just that,
Mr Penker, Arnold,
Arnie, as I like to call him,
he's very protective
of this collection at the moment
and, um, I would get
in serious, serious trouble
if anybody over there knew
I was even talking to you.
Oh, yes. That's right.
He explained all that.
It's all very... Shh. Hush-hush.
[Ana] Yes, yes.
Very, very hush-hush.
I promise, Catherine, you are in
very great hands with Claire.
There is no one better suited
to this deal.
To be honest,
she's very old school,
and I'm sort of
the young whippersnapper
stepping on her toes.
I wouldn't want her to think
that I'm poaching
or disrespecting her in any way.
Cause that would be
really bad for me.
- And for the company.
- Oh.
Very bad.
Very cut-throat,
the art business.
[laughs] Yeah.
Ana, if you can't work on
my auction, at the very least,
you must come out with us again
tomorrow night.
There's an event
at the Southbank.
Another artsy party, I'm afraid,
but everyone will be there.
Ana has to see this gallery,
and you must take her.
Or she could get swept off
her feet by some other chap,
and then, where will you be?
- Where will you be?
- In the pub.
This all sounds great
and, despite this
incredible evening,
I'm not really here on holiday.
Oh, well,
if you both don't come,
it will put me off
the whole night. Will.
Relax! You're spectacular
with pressure, I must say.
Either way, I'm so glad
you could make it tonight.
And I will leave tickets
for Midsummer with Will.
And you two can figure it out,
Thank you so much
for everything, Catherine.
And, please,
if you could refrain
from mentioning any of this...
Ana Santos? Never heard of her.
- Never heard of her.
- Exactly.
Goodnight, Catherine.
Happy birthday.
Uh, don't forget this.
How could I?
- All right. Bye.
- Bye.
Lovely meeting you, Julian.
Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.
[phone pings]
[Will laughs]
Off the line! Good save,
good save, good save.
Go on! Oh!
[Will groans]
Well played.
Come in, come in.
OK. Right. Great work today.
OK? Starting to see
some real progress from you all
which is great.
We've got a big game
on the weekend.
It's a must-win
if we want to be champions, OK?
Who's she?
You seem a little old
to be playing with these guys.
I only play at training.
But apart from that,
I am the head coach,
head manager, head cheerleader.
Wow. Seems like
a lot of responsibility.
What are you guys called?
[all] The Lions!
Especially that one.
He actually bites.
Stop staring
at the beautiful American woman
and give me a lap to finish off.
- [all groan]
- Don't moan.
If you wanna be champions,
you have to put the work in, OK?
Right, on my whistle.
- What's this?
- It's a whistle.
- What do I do?
- Blow it.
- [loud whistle]
- That was good.
Is this where one comes
to score some West End tickets?
I had to find time to fit you
in my busy schedule.
You mean when you're not at work
in the middle of the day?
The marketing thing,
that's just for fun.
No, this... This is my real job.
- I know what you're doing.
- What? What am I doing?
Come on, you know.
You know what you're doing.
Having me show up here
when you're all...
What? Coaching an at-risk
youth football team
or looking increasingly like
the Premier League player
of your dreams?
- Not my type.
- [sighs]
Art history degree, remember?
All you nerdy types
love us footballers.
OK. This nerdy type
has to go back to work,
so if you could kindly
give me those tickets,
I'll be on my way.
- Right. About that.
- Oh, no.
No, I have them. I thought
we could get lunch first.
- Lunch?
- Yeah.
I barely had time
to meet you here.
You don't have time for lunch?
Oh. Well, you should've just
sent one of your assistants then.
[laughs] Well, I don't know.
I just wanted to see you.
In that case,
I'll walk you back.
Follow me.
I'll give you the tickets,
but you've gotta promise
to be my date tonight.
Tell your mom I say thank you,
and I will consider
being your date tonight.
It's at the Southbank.
You're the one
that likes that sort of thing.
There'll be nothing there
that I like unless you show.
I will see
if I can get off early.
We're actually really busy
planning the Brovil collection.
Listen, I will get my mum
to cancel the whole bloody thing
if it will free up
your schedule.
Uh, you don't have to do that.
I can probably go.
Then I'll pick you up
at your hotel at eight.
Don't come to the hotel.
If I go, I will meet you there.
- OK.
- Oh, before I forget.
Oh, no, no, no. You can keep it,
you can keep it as a memento.
Every time you blow it,
you'll think of me.
- [Ana] Oh, shut up.
- [laughs]
I finished everything.
- You smell like grass.
- Foul. Claire!
You're here.
Thank you
for stating the obvious.
Have these dresses steamed,
special attention to the hem.
If they ruin them, it's on you.
- [Arnold laughs]
- Suzette, you're up.
Tell me you have those tickets.
Otherwise, stop breathing.
Claire, I'm so sorry. It was
impossible. I called everyone.
- Did you say impossible?
- I'm sorry.
You mean for Midsummer
Night's Dream, right?
Cause I got you two tickets
for this evening.
What are you talking about?
So, the new kid does it again.
And, uh, what about that
special project that I gave you?
I emailed you the spreadsheet
with the final numbers.
Oh, and I confirmed Catherine
DeLaroche for Monday at ten.
Catherine DeLaroche
is coming here?
- She just said that.
- I confirmed the guest list
and I proofed the catalogue and
I did the painting descriptions.
[Suzette gasps]
I cannot thank you enough.
I am so looking forward to this.
And Rome. Fantastic job.
You saved my ass.
- Oh.
- Well done.
Don't sound so surprised,
Arnold. It's what I do.
- I have a surprise for you.
- Uh, what about the dinner?
Skip it.
Job is mine, prick.
Oh, you sound paranoid, Claire.
I am only here to help.
Like you helped yourself
to my clients last year?
Oh, my God.
When can we move past that?
How about when I take over
and move you out of the company?
[phone pings]
[phone pings]
["Tom Menor"
by Luiz de Aquino]
- [gasps]
- Hi.
- So good. Oh, darling.
- You look so good.
- Good grief, you are ravishing.
- [Catherine] Right?
[Ana] Oh, stop. [laughs]
OK, come on, darlings.
- You do look nice.
- Oh, I think this is the night.
I can sense a soulmate here.
How many soulmates
does that make so far?
Oh, I stopped counting long ago.
- Ah, John.
- Catherine.
Hello. Thank you so much
for having us.
[John] It's always a pleasure.
You know Julian and Will.
And this is our guest,
Ana Santos.
- Hi.
- Ana.
I'm worried people are gonna be
looking at you in that dress
and not at my paintings.
Oh, thank you.
Good job,
uh, with the paintings.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
[man] John, there's someone
I'd like you to meet.
If you'll excuse me.
Um, enjoy the evening.
What do you think of it?
- I love it.
- Really?
No. No, I think
it looks like a big blue...
Willy, come fetch some drinks
with me.
[Catherine] Darling.
What you said
at my party last night,
it's been stuck in my head
all day.
Oh, God. What did I say?
- About my collection.
- What about it?
Just how, by looking
at those paintings,
you showed me a soft side
of Boris that I never saw.
Made me miss him, that's all.
And knowing
that I'm parting ways
with those pieces so soon...
It's made me nostalgic.
I understand, but
everything's gonna be OK, right?
Yes, of course.
[photographer] Smile.
Just one more.
- Here you go.
- Ah!
- I think I have to go.
- What?
I just got hit with a wave of
jet lag. I'm feeling so tired,
but thank you so much,
- So good to see you.
- Good to see you. Bye.
- Catalogue?
- No, thanks.
Who's your friend?
Is she also an actress?
No, that's Ana Santos.
She works for Erwins.
She's their New York director.
What's going on?
Nothing, I just feel...
I feel tired.
[laughs] I don't know.
I go to these events
in New York all the time,
and I just thought
maybe we could do
something different tonight.
Take the night off.
I'm sorry. I didn't realise
you took nights off.
Well, I would tonight.
OK. I have an idea.
[loud music]
I'm glad to see your sudden
onset of jet lag has pissed off.
Yeah, turns out
you knew the solution.
What was it back there then?
You allergic to Mayfair?
- What?
- Are you allergic to Mayfair?
Oh, um...
Oh, no, I just...
I didn't wanna be seen with you.
- Ouch.
- Sorry.
Yeah, well, we're not done yet.
- What do you mean? We're not?
- No, come on.
["Angel" by Lava La Rue]
So, should we get a cab?
Yeah, we could. We could.
Wouldn't that be faster?
Yeah, it definitely would be,
but, um, then we wouldn't be
able to walk together.
Here, look, you can take this.
- [Will] Well, here we are.
- [Ana] Yep.
Your beautiful hotel.
My beautiful hotel.
Gonna invite me inside?
Excuse me? Very forward.
What happened to your manners,
Downton Abbey?
I'm more
of a Bridgerton man myself.
Sorry. I gotta go up.
I have a lot of work to do
Oh. Here I was, thinking
you were taking the night off.
- I did.
- OK, fine. Fine.
Well, I guess we'll just have
to wait until date number three.
We'll see.
You know
the last time I was here,
I was meant
to tell you something.
What's that?
You still need to pay me back
for the shoes.
You're done.
OK. I should go up.
Oh, you're killing me.
- [laughs]
- You are.
Goodnight, Will.
[exhales deeply]
[exhales deeply]
- Sorry.
- Not at all.
- It's nothing really.
- OK.
I just made out
with, like, a solid ten.
- Ten?
- Ten.
- Nice.
- Yeah.
Can I get you something?
Oh, no. I'm just waiting
for him to leave.
- Oh. Do you not like him?
- I like him a lot,
but he thinks I'm staying here,
and I'm not.
- Right.
- Yeah.
- Can I get you a cab?
- That'd be great.
Thank you.
- Are you gonna see him again?
- I don't know.
Not sure I'll have time.
["Iceblink Luck"
by Cocteau Twins]
Hi, yeah. I was just wondering
if I could get a reservation
for two sometime this week.
Oh, Wednesday would be perfect.
I'm sorry, two months? Yeah.
- No, that's not gonna work.
- Ana, give me the phone.
- Uh, one second.
- Give me the phone.
Hello. Hi, is that Casey?
Casey, it's Will DeLaroche.
Do you think you might be able
to do me a massive favour?
I got you the reservation.
["Iceblink Luck"
by Cocteau Twins continues]
So, this job in New York.
If I get the offer.
- If you get the offer...
- Mm-hmm.
Is it something
you might actually take?
Well, it's looking
more and more attractive.
Why would you wanna
move to New York
when your life here in London
is so incredible?
I want...
So, my mum's birthday party
the other day...
It's been like that
my whole life.
You know what it's like,
the scene, the people.
They're trying to use you
to get to whatever it is
that they're after.
And, in my case,
it just so happens to be,
embarrassingly enough, my mum.
And that gets old.
And that is why
you are such an anomaly.
What makes me an anomaly?
You're rich, successful.
You're the youngest director
this company has ever had.
And yet, you're still,
like, a real person.
And I've seen money
change people.
I've seen them turn to monsters
like that and..
You're still just real.
And that means a lot.
Right, so here's to hoping
that I get this job.
Here's hoping.
I talked to William DeLaroche
at the Southbank Friday night.
- Catherine's son?
- Mm-hmm. He was all over me.
No one cares who you talked to,
- Ah. Good morning, Ana.
- Morning.
Would you come into my office
and close the door behind you?
Someone's in trouble...
We knew you wouldn't last long.
Anyways, Will and I
would have the hottest babies.
Oh, you lucky cow.
So, how are you?
Life, stuff, what are you into?
Yeah, um... what am I into?
I'm really into... [exhales]
working for you.
- Mm-hmm. Good.
- I'm very happy.
- Very, very grateful to be here.
- Good.
Yeah. Yep...
Hmm. [sighs]
Why are you looking at me
like that?
Um... I'm just... I'm just...
I'm confused.
Um, what are we...
what are we doing?
We're having a chat.
And the chocolate!
Oh. OK, great...
I know what you've been doing.
What do you mean?
Did you think I wouldn't notice?
I see how hard
you've been working.
I notice it every day.
I want you to know
it's appreciated
and then, when I take over,
it will be rewarded.
Wow. Thank you, Claire.
That's... That's...
That's incredible.
- I know.
- [knocking at door]
- Yes?
- It's Catherine DeLaroche.
- Send her in.
- Oh, no, um... she's not here.
She's on the phone.
- I'll let you take that.
- What?
[door closes]
It's Claire.
DeLaroche just cancelled
the auction.
What? What did she say?
[Claire] She got very
sentimental about the paintings.
Something about
the "love hidden within."
Some fucking hippie bullshit!
But what I do know...
is no one gives up millions
of dollars for no reason.
- Someone got in her ear.
- Sotheby's.
It could be another collector
trying to swoop in
and buy everything from her,
but without us.
All it takes is one idiot
with one stupid comment
to make her
lose confidence in us.
You! You said that
you saw her son William
at the gallery the other night.
Did he say anything
about a cancellation?
I actually, um...
I didn't talk to him.
I made that up.
- What's wrong with you?
- So many things.
Everybody's one and only job
is to find out
who's behind this cancellation.
[Arnold] These paintings have
been off the market for decades.
If Sotheby's took this from us,
they'll laugh all the way
to the bank.
Now, you
tell me you can fix this.
I can fix this.
I always do.
[door opens, closes]
[loud chatter]
[woman] Ana?
Sorry, um, there's a Willy
at the front desk for ya.
- Who's that?
- Thing for Claire. Don't worry.
Thought I'd make a bold gesture.
Come here.
- Hang on a minute.
- Just keep walking.
What are you doing here?
Just thought I'd surprise you
for lunch.
You can't just show up here
- What? I don't understand.
- You don't understand?
You don't understand
how inappropriate it is
to show up here
the day that your mom
pulls her collection
from our auction?
Ana, that has nothing
to do with me.
I have no idea
what she's doing with all that.
Nothing to do with you?
You're her son.
I work for Erwins.
This was such a bad idea to
begin with. I'm such an idiot!
Let's not get hyperbolic.
So she pulled a few pieces,
or whatever...
It's not the end of the world.
I mean, you do these
all the time anyway.
Just because you don't
give a shit, Will,
doesn't mean it doesn't matter.
This shit matters to me. I give
a shit. I give a lot of shits.
This was the biggest auction
of my career.
And I put it at risk
because I thought
you and your mom
understood that.
I'm sorry. I didn't know that it
meant that much to you, Ana.
It does.
I came here to tell you
that I got the job offer
from the firm in New York.
[laughs] That's great.
That's really great, um...
I wish I could be happier
for you,
but while you get an offer
for a job
that you've literally never
needed, now mine is at risk.
Never needed?
[Ana] This was such a mistake.
No, I think the only mistake
here was me not realising
that this entire relationship
was based on whether or not
you were getting something
in return.
Tickets, invitations, attention.
- Will.
- Good luck to you.
[loud chatter]
[phone pings]
[Arnold] Ms Santos!
A word, please.
- Quite the photo.
- Claire, I can explain.
No, I'll explain. In this photo,
you're wearing my dress.
You're the director
of Erwins New York
having such a wonderful time
with our client.
It's so strange because I'm the
director of Erwins New York.
But I'm so glad that
it's you in this photo.
Since Catherine
pulled the collection,
you're really doing
an incredibly shit job.
I know that I probably
look crazy right now,
but I promise I never intended
for any of this to happen.
I met Catherine's son
on the plane
and he misinterpreted something
I said. It was an accident.
It's not an accident. You lied.
You lied your way
into Catherine's confidence.
You pretended to have my job.
You shimmied your way
into my couture.
It's a shame you couldn't have
something like my competence.
Catherine is not responding.
Let me deal with Catherine.
I can fix this, trust me.
"Trust" is not the word
that comes to mind, darling.
Suzette, I want her on a plane.
I want her out of here now.
- My pleasure.
- Call security.
[Gerard] Excuse me, Claire,
but you really had no idea
she was masquerading as you?
You fuck off, Gerard.
A lot of people want to be me.
How can that be possible
with you, Claire?
I was called to Rome.
Oh, you're suggesting
I'm to blame?
- Well, it certainly didn't help.
- [Arnold] Excuse me.
I've got to start
cleaning up your mess.
Gerard is taking point in the
auction until I figure this out.
You're making this too easy.
Bravo, Gerard. Remove her.
She no longer works at Erwins.
I'm so unbelievably sorry.
You're a terrible waste
of potential.
I'm so sorry, bud. I wish
I could be there to help.
I know, Viv.
I wish you were here too.
- [squealing]
- What was that?
Listen, I hate to tell you this
on the worst day of your life,
but... Ronnie and I
got a Great Dane!
- Wait, what?
- [squeals]
This is Mario! He lives here
instead of you now.
Mario is our baby, and you know
how little space we have.
So why would you get
a Great Dane?
But it's OK.
I'm gonna take all your stuff
and put it in a crate
and put it out in the hallway.
She's having a hard time.
It's OK.
I've literally just been
thrown out on the street
and I'm being replaced
by a Great Dane.
- Aw...
- There's always the navy.
- [hangs up]
- [sighs]
[phone pings]
[man] The best decision
I ever made? That's easy.
I joined the US Navy.
No, they didn't fire me because
I was hanging out with a client
I wasn't supposed to know.
No, they fired me because...
because I was
impersonating my boss.
I'm not a director at Erwins.
[chuckles] I'm not even close
to being a director at Erwins.
Before I came to London,
I was handing out catalogues
and paddles
and folding chairs.
They fired me because I lied.
I'm realising that pretending
to be more than I am
got me further in a week
than being myself did in a year.
I lied, Catherine,
because I wanted to live
somebody else's life for once
because I am so insecure
of my own.
I'm really surprised
by all of this, Ana.
I thought I knew you.
For all we know, she even
made up the name Ana Santos.
No. Ana's my name, Ana Santos.
Oh, well, thank God for that.
We've got something real
to work with.
I really don't know what to say,
to be honest.
What do you think, Julian?
[Catherine] Wildly shocked, yes.
- Unbelievably shocked.
- Incredibly shocked.
[Julian] Hmm!
- [clapping continues]
- Bravo! Well done.
Pretending to be other people
is supposed to be
what I do for a living.
[Julian chuckles]
You're not mad?
Well, some people
have called me mad.
- Do you think I'm mad?
- Barking.
I'm just an admirer
of a good performance.
You should be in the theatre.
You would still be poor but
you'd get in a lot less trouble.
Darling, you should know,
none of this is your fault.
That's very nice, Catherine,
I'm not being nice.
I was using you.
- Using me?
- Mm-hmm.
- It was all a sales strategy.
- [Catherine laughs]
A what?
[Catherine] When I was a young,
I found myself in Casablanca.
- Great movie.
- Shut up, Julian.
I lived in Morocco.
And I learned how to bargain
at the Grand Bazaar.
One of the most
important things:
right before concluding a deal,
try to walk away.
If they're convinced
that you will actually leave,
they might just make
a better offer.
What about Boris? I thought this
was all because of what I said.
I knew Boris a bit better
than you, darling.
I mean, I was married to him,
for God's sake.
The only thing that man
cared about and loved was money.
It wasn't like I thought
anyone would get hurt.
So none of this is my fault?
You're talented.
But it takes a bit more than
some soft words about paintings
to make me turn down
85 million.
I've decided
I want a beach house.
- [laughs]
- In Spain. I do.
So... what are you saying?
I think it's time
we go down there
and get this auction on track.
- For less commission.
- Of course.
I can't go back to Erwins.
I just got escorted out
by security.
You're absolutely right.
You cannot go back to Erwins
with paint all over your bottom.
Um, permission to raid
the closet?
Permission granted.
- [gasps]
- Security!
So nice of you to make it.
Julian, old boy.
You look splendid.
- I heard you were dead.
- Not as dead as this deal was
before young Ana here
talked me round.
- What's she doing here?
- Ana's with me.
- What can I do for you?
- Well...
I would like to go ahead
with the auction...
with one minor change.
I'm too... personally attached.
I'm appointing someone to manage
the auction on my behalf.
Someone I trust.
Whomever you choose.
Ana Santos will manage
the auction for me.
Wow! [laughs]
I expect you to treat her
like you would treat me.
If I hear otherwise, I'll move
my collection to Sotheby's.
Are you kidding? We are...
thrilled to work with Ana.
She's an amazing young woman
from our training program.
- Do we have a problem?
- Nope. Absolutely not.
Is there, Claire?
- Welcome back, Ana.
- Welcome back, Ana.
- Love you.
- Love you. Thank you.
And, uh,
thank you for trusting us.
Ana, would you like to grab
Suzette's desk?
- What?
- We want Ana to be comfortable.
Drink? Water? Champagne?
That won't be necessary,
Arnold, but thank you.
Now before we start,
there is one person I can safely
say I'd like off the team.
What? No, no, darling.
You can't do that.
Yes, I can, darling.
Claire was horrible to you.
Don't you want revenge?
No. I don't want revenge.
I want Claire.
She's done more for this company
than anybody else in this room
and grossed
twice as much as you.
Well, Gerard, it appears
no one wants you. Let's go.
- Uh, excuse me. Claire stays?
- Claire stays, yeah.
Come on.
- What the fuck is going on?
- I told them the truth.
Do tell.
I told them you were the single
best person for the auction,
and that you will ruin anybody
who crosses you or the company.
You've had to fight
for your spot here...
and so have I.
Go on.
I'd like to start
with the opening bids.
I think we could be
undervaluing some pieces.
What do you think?
Actually, I do agree.
I knew there was a reason
I liked you. I'm never wrong.
Shall we get to work?
[indistinct chatter]
[clears throat]
I just wanted to say,
as a fellow woman of colour,
you are such an inspiration.
Oh, my God, Renee. She just
has an olive complexion.
What? She's from Guatemala.
[scoffs] You really need
to educate yourself.
I'm from Florida.
- [clicks fingers]
- Chairs. Chairs.
Floridian, you got them working.
That's impressive.
[gasps] You! The bizarre socks!
Can I have a word?
- [loud chatter]
- [gavel bangs]
[auctioneer] Final piece
for the Brovil collection.
Starting at 75 million.
Looking for 85.
At 90 million. Thank you, madam.
One hundred I'm bid.
With the lady here
at 100 million.
Any advance on 100?
All done at 100?
I have 110
with the gentleman here
at 110 million. 120, well done.
Would you like to go 130?
We do. 130.
We have 130 million on my right
with the gentleman.
- Deep breath. 140!
- [crowd gasps]
A record for the artist, 140.
We're selling.
Not yours quite yet, sir. 140.
No more for you, sir?
No more on the telephones.
With the lady. Are you sure?
- [bangs gavel]
- Sold! Final sale.
- [cheering]
- [auctioneer] 250 million.
Biggest auction
in Erwins's history.
- When are you leaving?
- Tonight.
I have some clients in New York
I'd like to see.
- You don't stop, do you?
- Hmm.
Exactly how Erwins's
future chairwoman should be.
Thank you, Arnold.
[Arnold] Let's talk about it.
Come on.
Long time coming.
Oh. Be ready to leave
at seven o'clock tonight
and you won't need
an upgrade either.
You're going to be up front
where you belong.
- Wasn't that exciting?
- Ana, congratulations.
That wasn't
a low commission after all.
No, it wasn't. Did Will make it?
- No, of course not.
- Right.
- Men and their football.
- Oh! That's right.
I've got 20 quid on it.
I just really wanted to
explain to him that...
Wait, what?
The Lions are in
the Championship game
and seven-year-olds
can't coach themselves.
[Julian laughs]
You lied. I put up
with a lot of things in my life,
but lying I don't have time for.
The world is hard enough
without me having
to look over my shoulder.
I suppose that means
nothing to you.
And that breaks my heart.
You made me believe
that you wanted to win,
that you wanted to be champions.
Their best player has asthma.
You lot are drawing to a team
whose best player needs
an inhaler to get on the pitch.
I wasn't gonna say this now,
but since we are where we are,
I will, OK?
After the game, I'm treating
you all to Pizza Express.
You've worked hard this season
and you deserve it.
But if you win,
I personally guarantee you all
unlimited ice cream.
What if I want six scoops?
- Unlimited.
- [children gasp]
Now, I want you to go out there
and play your hearts out
for these final minutes.
Not just for yourselves,
not even for me.
Not for your mums and dads,
whoever has come down
to watch you today,
but for chocolate,
vanilla, pistachio,
that weird flavour
that Zayn likes.
- Gooseberry.
- Exactly.
Now, hands in. Come on.
- One, two, three!
- [all] Lions!
- Come on!
- [child] Let's do this!
[whistle blows]
[whistle blows]
I thought bribes
weren't allowed in sports.
[scoffs] Now is really
not a good time.
Yeah. It's just that, uh...
my plane leaves in,
like, three hours
and I really can't leave
without talking to you.
With all due respect,
we're in the final minutes here.
- Got it.
- Defence, Tommy, defence!
[children chatter and shout]
I was hoping to talk to you
after the auction,
- but then you never showed.
- Yeah. I heard it went well.
I heard about my mum's
strategy with the deal.
I heard about your big
confessional as well.
Yeah. Turns out we were
both lying about something.
Uh, acting.
My mum's a lot of things,
but she's not a liar, OK?
Right, well, neither am I.
Not most of the time, anyway.
Look, Will, I'm really sorry
for lying to you,
but I need you to know that even
though I lied about what I do,
I wasn't lying about who I am
and how I feel.
I couldn't make that up
even if I tried.
I would love it
if we could start fresh
with nothing but reality
this time.
Look, I appreciate that, but
if we're talking about reality,
you are literally about to fly
a thousand miles out of my life.
What? What happened to
the job in New York?
- I turned it down.
- You turned it down? Why?
Ryan, you're not moving!
Come on, wake up!
Look, Ana. I am glad
that it's all working out for
you now, that you won
and that my mum's getting
her beach house in Spain.
It's great that you're
being nice to me again
now you've gotten everything
you wanted,
but you were awful to me
when it looked like things
weren't going to go your way.
That is pretty hard to see
any differently.
I was going to tell you
the truth eventually, I swear.
I was trying to find a way to
do it without coming off insane,
which feels impossible now.
I was in over my head
and it snowballed.
But, honestly, Will,
I don't think you would've
kept talking to me
if you knew the truth.
The truth being that...
I'm not like you. I don't
have any family connections,
I have no savings, I've been
in credit card debt for years.
I still live in a
one-bedroom apartment
with my sister and her fianc.
I wake up every morning on their
futon as an unwelcome guest
hoping that if I got the shot to
impress my boss even a little,
I'd get the chance
to impress somebody like you.
And then nobody would have
to know that I have nothing
and I'm... I'm nobody.
Well, then I'm clearly not the
person who you thought I was,
and whoever it was
you were trying to impress
sounds like a right prick.
- [football net rattles]
- [children cheer]
- [whistle blows]
- [Will cheers] Oh, my God!
Yes! Ryan, you little beauty!
Yes! Yes! Yes! Brilliant stuff.
OK, hold on one second.
Look, Ana. You are somebody.
Probably someone great too.
I just never had a chance
to find out.
I wish I'd gotten the chance
to meet the real you,
futon and all.
Have a safe flight back, OK?
- Right, come on. Let's go!
- [children cheer]
I'm so proud of you lot.
Yes. As promised,
ice cream and pizza.
[chuckles quietly]
[indistinct announcement]
- [attendant] Champagne?
- Oh, thank you.
[sirens and traffic sounds]
- [dog pants]
- [background chatter]
- Hey.
- Hi.
You know, I think I get it now.
I would've been a millionaire
in kindergarten.
- Ronnie!
- What?
- It's nice.
- It's a square, Viv.
There's free food and drink
over there.
- How do you know it's free?
- It's my gallery.
- Hmm.
- That is class, Ana.
Knock yourself out.
[Ronnie] I told you she could
do it, didn't I, Viv?
If I got that
kind of commission,
I'm flying with Maverick.
How does it feel
to run a gallery?
Feels pretty good, Amy.
- You've got money.
- Yeah.
- You've got your health.
- Yup.
You could probably get on Raya.
Claire's network goes
a long way.
Look, she's here.
I didn't think she'd make it.
Too busy ruling the world.
Well, I'm sorry you know who
didn't show up.
No, it's fine.
Pretty dumb of me
to get my hopes up.
Let's go out tonight.
I know that there are thousands
of people in this city
who would love to fu...
talk to you.
And he had his chance.
Maybe another time.
I gotta stay and lock up.
[woman] Congrats. It's really
wonderful. Fantastic job.
- [Ana] Oh, thank you.
- [man] Thank you so much.
[Ana] I really appreciate
you guys coming. Thank you.
- [woman] Really great, Ana.
- [Ana] Thanks, guys.
[suitcase clatters]
Do you know how hard it was
to swipe those?
Will. [laughs]
What are you doing here?
Did you accept the job
in New York?
[Will] Yeah,
but that's not why I'm here.
Why are you here?
You still owe me for the suedes.
I will buy you new suedes
if you admit that you missed me.
Ooh, that's a hard bargain.
Is this the part when you
walk away from a bad deal?
I don't think
I can do that again.
What do we do now?
Let's start by dropping off
your bags at my place.
Nice futon.