Waarom Wettelen (2024) Movie Script
1
Well...
You are love,
Deep as the sea...
ready as a grain gin,
stronger than death.
Don't let go of one human child.
You who don't forget a name...
No matter how hard to
spell or modern that may be.
You, who don't despise anyone.
Don't leave death, who
separates everything and hurts...
just be forever.
Give us the liberation
of that second death.
You who spoke to us...
For those who are defenseless...
And for their namesakes
in our midst, to say...
The refugees, the strangers...
The lactose sensors.
Don't let us go empty
and lost and without insight.
We know, the bottle near...
The easy sinking.
Do us like a willing
mussel open...
For the vision of peace that has
been calling us since time immemorial.
But...
Can I sit down?
- Naturally.
I didn't expect you here.
Man, that's a long time ago.
You were a source of
joy for me, Christine...
And you will always stay that way.
All I have to do for that...
Is thinking about you.
Remember things.
Like that time when we
were together in Tunisia...
And you claimed to
reincarnate later in a camel.
By the way, I have to get
used to that, Christine...
To the idea that
you are now a camel.
During that trip you received
a legendary attack of diarrhea.
None of the two knew then...
That you could get
the diarrhea so hard.
The couscous rang
out like a waterfall.
But it was with a
meter -wide smile...
And a positive attitude...
That you spent that entire
journey on the toilet bowl.
She has another.
A gynecologist.
That is completely
the opposite...
from a funeral director.
Well...
I put it on a drink tonight.
I fell asleep on the couch.
I haven't heard my alarm clock.
A gynecologist, damn it.
That's intense shit, man.
And I just believe that
she had to check so often.
Yes... the cervix.
She had the age for it.
To have a neck?
Very, isn't it?
We will stay
together here forever.
Who do you mean by us?
We.
All of us.
The whole family.
There is also room for the partners and...
The children if they might come.
The grandchildren.
Pets.
And we are not allowed to
decide on our last resting place?
A dead person has never
been able to decide anything.
Mama didn't really
want to be buried at all.
She wanted to be flamboyed.
In Cognac.
She always said that to me.
If she had drunk something.
Then she said that.
Dad, Antoine is here.
Is Antoine here?
- Yes.
Can I ask something?
Is it still possible to
put her right, please?
In bed she always
wanted to lie on the right.
That may be unusual.
I know.
It seems that most
women are left.
Apologies...
Notary Vercammen.
Can I talk to you?
What is the problem?
Yes... my sincere apologies...
That I come to disturb
you at this difficult moment.
Dieltje Christine
was my client...
Wait, should that be now?
Yes, I fear so.
This is her last will.
And it was her wish...
that she would not
be buried here...
But in law.
Pardon?
Where?
In law.
Can I see that for a moment?
Would she not have meant Wetteren?
She had some problems
with the 'r' sometimes, right?
What are you saying?
Mama had no problems
with the 'r' at all?
Where do you suddenly get that from?
Can I see it?
And where is that?
- Below.
And that certainly can't be a typo?
- No.
Well.
It is also typical mom.
Always think of an excuse for...
To not have to sleep yet.
No, I don't think it's on the map.
- Nothing?
Also not on the internet.
And I get all the time:
"Do you mean Wetteren?"
Maybe a strange question.
Does anyone happen
to know where Legal is?
Legal?
Yes.
- With an 'l'?
Yes.
- Naturally.
So legal exists?
Otherwise I wouldn't
know where it is.
How do you know where
Legal is, But not the GPS?
You will have to ask the GPS.
I used to be a taxi driver.
Customers are much
friendlier when they are dead.
That's why I switched.
And is that far?
Legal?
- Yes.
Is not too bad.
Walking, I mean.
Walking or by bike,
It stays just as far.
Don't I get a kiss?
Hey.
- Hey.
You look good.
What is the case with you?
Great.
I have just seen the grave
where I will someday be located.
It looks good.
Big.
There is a piece of land around it.
No WiFi for the children,
So that becomes difficult.
I didn't know you already had children.
No, but they already have a grave.
So I will have to make it now.
Yes.
Legal exists.
Okay.
- Yes.
The driver knows where it is
he says.
Are we going to
bring Mama to Legal?
Yes, if that was her last wish,
I think we should respect it...
And then we have to do that on foot.
How long are we going to do about that?
That is not neat to ask.
Unless you have to bring in
an important contract tomorrow.
According to that funeral
it is a few days of walking.
He can't estimate it properly
Because he is not a walker, he says.
We really go for several days...
Walk in the exhaust
gases of that hearse?
Yes...
Christine apparently wanted
to be buried there, so...
Don't ask me why,
I just hear it, but...
I loved her...
So I'm going to guide
her there. If necessary.
Everyone must determine for
themselves whether he wants to come.
Or can come along.
- Or can, yes.
And that in that wheelchair.
Have you ever looked well?
She doesn't look
really fresh anymore.
That is a customer that we have lost.
By you.
What you have lost Is
your empathy for the living.
And something else: it is not possible.
That car has to go to the
inspection this afternoon.
Bunch of failed garage owners,
Goddamn.
Completely rejected.
They can kiss our balls.
Shall I take it over for a while?
- Yes, is good. Thank you.
Have you actually talked to Dad?
That is difficult.
Why did you suddenly
have to leave our family then?
Do you know that?
I have many problems
with my health...
and I have to go from the
doctor Take 7,000 steps a day.
Hence...
She wasn't just my client...
Of course I also knew
Christine very well.
Personally, I mean, right?
Yes?
We sat together on wheelchair basketball.
So right?
Played Christine wheelchair basketball?
Yes, fifteen years.
Just like her sister.
Christine wasn't in
a wheelchair, is it?
Surely a bobsleigh does not
go to the baker in his bobsleigh?
Isn't that something completely different?
You don't have to be disabled
for wheelchair basketball.
That is not mandatory.
And if you tackle it smart...
Arrange a disabled
parking card in this way.
Christine did not have
a disabled parking card.
Because she has
not cleverly tackled it.
Wheelchair basketball.
I always thought that
was a stupid excuse...
To be able to do other things.
You're sure Kaat?
- Yes.
You don't really look like
your father But on Christine.
And you are?
I am Herman, I am a
childhood friend of your mother.
Ever since kindergarten actually.
I once caught in my pants.
And Christine smelled that right away.
She had a good nose, your mother.
- That's true, yes.
She could smell it at home if the
neighbors were
draining their cauliflower.
Really a very good nose.
But that was an incident...
I was bullied with it
That day at school.
Children are cruel against each other.
But Christine said to
me, "Herman," she said...
"You have packed in your
pants, isn't it?" I remember well.
I must have been about
five years old, I think.
'You have packed in your pants
and do you know what I'm going to do?
I'm also going to poke in my pants.
Then you are not the only one."
And then I knew: that
girl stays in my life forever.
Sounds in love.
Five years.
Yes?
- Yes.
Today we certainly don't save anymore?
I don't think so, no.
No.
Any idea where we can stay here
somewhere in the neighborhood?
I know something.
It's a two -hour walk.
Two hours walk...
Something cheap.
An adultery hotel.
Otherwise we should see
if we are welcome here.
HM?
- Yes.
Yes.
Yes...
It is a strict order.
I think they would rather
see candles than people...
But they understand
our exceptional situation.
So we can spend the
night here if we want.
There are fathers who have not
seen a woman for 50 years, so...
Keep that in mind please.
It is a resort of reflection...
But maybe that's good today.
Do they have a Trappist?
- Pardon?
Do they have a Trappist?
- You will have to ask them yourself.
Do they have sherry?
Let it go.
I don't really want to spend
the night here with pedophiles.
It is true: A Trappist
would now go into it.
I will stay with Auntie.
And where are you going to sleep?
They can go in the car if they want.
It is made to lie in.
I thought today.
It was a good
move from Christine.
My sister always
said what it was on.
I think so.
- And not Bas.
But she loved him.
But that silence from
him, That was on her.
She had a hard time with that.
The children.
Of course he has always known...
That he was not the
causative agent of his children.
It is not.
It is that his
children don't know.
And that he doesn't want them to know.
I have to stretch my legs.
Enough situated and sat today.
You have not changed anything yet, you.
Sorry I am disturbed in
your moment of reflection...
But can I ask you something?
Of course, my sheep.
Do you happen to have
those discreet wipes here?
You know
For the lost drops of puddles.
You have to pray, my child.
Prayer is always the right way.
I should have grabbed you in the house.
I looked away and kept silent.
I did that.
Sorry for that.
I understand those fathers, actually.
We allow too little
silence in our lives.
I don't know what it was
But I have deeper last night...
And being able to think more clearly
than ever about my life with Christine.
It was like...
I was able to merge all those years...
could trace an essence.
Yes.
That was a lot of sorrow...
But much more joy.
Yes.
Christine is no longer
there. It doesn't come back.
But I keep love.
I understand you.
Did you be able to sleep?
No, not really, actually.
That was disappointing.
A lot of noise came out of the coffin.
I've heard...
That you should not be near
a dissolution before the break.
I put it in perspective.
She used to snore.
When I thought about that
suddenly got something familiar.
Nice.
You haven't told much yet.
I don't talk so easily.
Unless I drank
Then I don't stop.
Or do I say the same four times.
I recognize that.
I recognize that.
So you are Mrs.'s notary?
Madam?
I never knew the deceased.
Maybe I will get to know
her. That cannot be excluded.
That is what everyone
is doing now, I think.
Do you also have a pedometer?
Or...
I am my belief in
those dating things...
And those apps lost.
I always swipe
to the wrong side.
Loneliness is
becoming harder for me.
So on my older day.
The cold in bed.
Sadly eating out alone...
And then everyone is looked at.
So...
I am looking for funeral
advertisements in the newspaper...
From ladies my age.
I'm going for the widowers.
Nobody has to be alone, right?
So I foam funerals.
Much more efficient than relationship
agencies. At least I hope so.
In any case, it is cheaper.
Do you have a woman?
I have two. Not easy
either, I can tell you that.
You probably don't do this often,
right? Spend the night for your work?
Since yesterday.
Yes, you have a point there.
Betty.
Frido.
Frido?
Frido Lesage.
11,430 steps today.
That is just as much as
mowing my grass seven times.
11,430 is not divisible by seven.
Everything is divisible
by seven. Even the love.
I hope they have a
guarded parking space here.
Those guests of the Vleeshenmafia...
are crazy about remains.
Trade in intestines.
Fat by hand soap.
You don't want to know
what they do in Frikandellen.
You won't be the first...
Who without knowing
it your father ate.
Sorry it took so long.
But it's like this: there
are enough rooms for all of us.
The thing is that there
is a party room below.
And there is a wedding party tonight.
So yes, we will probably
hear that music in our room.
The bridal couple said that
we are welcome at their party.
Those who feel
like it, Naturally.
And there is food, so yes...
You didn't have to
say Christine twice.
He had already been
on that dance floor.
I think so too.
- Is there a Trappist?
Is there sherry?
A Trappist would now go into it.
Is there a secure
parking space here?
I don't know.
I will ask that.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I sometimes think it's time...
That you tell where you
suddenly come from, Antoine.
From the veranda.
From the porch?
From the veranda.
We will never see you again...
Mama dies and you are suddenly there.
While I don't think anyone
has sent a death notice.
We didn't have your address.
Thank you.
Hey.
Do you have a minibar?
Good idea.
It's already a drink time.
Sit down.
- Yes.
The favorite cocktail of your mommy.
The multi-cult.
Everything that contains alcohol.
Even aftershave.
Only, one golden
rule: never fruit in it.
Too healthy.
Mama could do that much better, but yes.
Like this.
Cheers.
- Cheers.
On Mama.
On Mama.
Dad, what's this all?
Your mother's funeral.
Yes, a funeral of a few days.
And Antoine who suddenly
comes to the surface.
All unknown people
who walk along...
Like that woman with that glasses.
Who is that?
- Don't know.
He didn't say
anything to me at all.
Yes, your mother was a...
A good director...
Don't know.
Maybe she wants to tell us something...
And is this her encore.
Don't know.
A gigantic, thick, Warm
placard in my pants.
So that scent, that autumn scent,
It spread throughout the class.
Everyone smelled it.
I was about to be
humiliated totally public...
And at that moment Christine
herself farted in her pants.
Out of solidarity.
And that is something
I will never forget.
Frikandellen.
When Christine and I got married...
there were veal sweetbreads.
Grilled in an Argentinian way.
Do you want my frikandel?
I just went to ask if
you want my frikandel.
Shall we exchange?
Is good.
He will put things up.
And from Dad he
used to be on balletles.
Why not actually?
You get tendinitis from that.
And kapsones, of course.
Mama had been on the
dance floor for a long time.
And her clothes have taken off.
She always ended in her underwear.
- If you were lucky.
No, you don't get me
sober on the dance floor.
Waiter, five multi-culti's,
Please.
He was tasty, your frikandel.
Is it not possible?
Is it going?
I don't want them to make
my mother Frikandellen.
Let it go.
That betty said something like that.
Have you already seen that
they have a swimming pool here?
I usually don't take my
swimwear to a funeral.
Swimwear.
Can you explain to me the
usefulness of wet clothes?
You were right.
Even that bathing cap is mandatory.
Then you might as
well say that I have lice.
From above and from below.
You are now going to tell
me what you have to say.
Or I squeeze your balls off.
Your parents loved each other.
But Bas...
It has a problem.
Always had.
He is asexual.
Is he impotent?
He has a body...
But that only serves
to digest his food.
Do you just tell me that
my father is not my father?
It's like that.
Christine wanted sex.
And she wanted children.
And she wanted to keep Bas in her life.
But after two children
from another...
Bas wanted a kind of
symbolic child of their together.
Say it is not true.
It's not true.
It should not be true too.
You couldn't.
I should not be allowed too.
I couldn't.
Oh no, say it's not true.
It's not true.
It is because of those
multi-culti's, of course.
You don't have to
justify yourself, estimate.
It is your wife's funeral.
Then some things are more
difficult. I understand that, estimate.
It is nothing to be ashamed of.
Treasure? Do you say treasure to me?
- It's okay.
Forget it.
But I have nothing to forget
Because nothing has happened.
Shit, that's intense.
My mother is dead and
my father is not my father.
Come, we have to go.
They are probably already
waiting for us outside.
Betty.
You could say Betty so beautifully.
Up, get ready, Betty.
Come on.
Otherwise we are too late.
He's there.
Then we will go again.
Please blow, please?
That's good, thank you.
Positive. When
did you last drink?
Yesterday.
- Yesterday?
Multi-culti's.
- Multi-culti's?
Grab your papers,
Then you can come along.
Just sign here, please.
Can anyone drive you again?
I spent my driver's
license for a few hours.
You smell like sex.
I have to buy sports
shoes somewhere.
You cannot bury your
mother in law in heels.
I wish I also smelled of sex.
At least if legal already exists.
I wish I also smelled of sex.
What is the plan?
- Well.
You get hungry from all that walking.
I don't understand that members of
a walking club are not much thicker.
And that's the first thing you
say? After more than two days.
I was not good enough
for you as a foster child.
Too stupid, too rude.
Unacceptable.
So you just glued me out.
Do you know how that feels?
To be thrown out
of a foster family?
You are just a dog that is
saved from the shelter...
Through a nice and sweet family.
And the following summer
the family will travel...
And they tie you to a tree.
That's what you did, Bas.
And all those years later you see me again.
And what do you ask me?
And what do you tell me?
That you don't understand why
members of a walking club are not thicker?
You managed to pull
yourself off from that tree.
That is very handsome of you.
There was only one
way to pull me loose.
That was with Boom and all.
I still carry it with me, that tree.
That's heavy.
What about your
parents' heroin addiction?
Good.
They have both been
successfully kicked off.
In the cemetery.
Do you know which
dog would suit me well?
A Maltese, I think.
Why?
You have people who
process their grief by eating.
Not me.
I am not like that.
I am not hungry when I am alone.
I am more of a party eater.
I am a party person.
Twice the mussels.
- Thank you.
Please.
- Thank you.
Lord, open us like
a willing mussel...
For the vision of peace that has
been calling us since time immemorial.
Enjoy your meal.
- Enjoy your meal.
I knew you would take mussels.
- Is that so?
I sat around a bit this morning.
I thought very deeply
and I think I understand.
I am the only one in the
family who likes mussels.
Didn't I have that from someone?
'You don't really look like your father
But on Christine."
Are there things I need to know?
Hereditary diseases or something,
What I have to be vaccinated against?
Perhaps the bacon disease.
Bacon spit disease?
- Yes, that's nothing bad.
Our rochels are a bit thicker,
A bit fatter than normal.
But you can live with
that and tongues with that.
But it is very hereditary.
That is.
I don't know if you realize it
But I have packed in my pants.
I smell it, yes.
As a father you have
never done anything for me.
You will not succeed
anyway, but...
I would like it if you
supported me a little more.
Please.
But...
The thing is...
- What?
What is the thing?
Is there something that is
more important than paternity?
No, of course not, but...
It shouldn't be.
Italian quality.
First pressing.
Does Bas know you know?
No.
And I would like to keep it that way.
He is my father and
he remains my father.
Does he know that you have conceived me?
How's the intestines?
- They already simmer.
Come on.
Does everyone have their passport?
Passport?
Is law abroad then?
Legal is abroad.
Not deep.
Not far.
But abroad.
Why have you not said that before?
I am rather insensitive to boundaries.
Insensitive?
Borders are arbitrary.
A hold for narrow -minded spirits.
I think, huh.
Passport?
Kolo Padere US Differron Me Oplikegert
Bastorde Klomp Sausst Yukelelelele.
Anyone?
He says that the contents
of the box must be checked.
But... that is not possible.
He can't mean that?
Jordelo Moportuti Holkerdu Brol.
Daftirde Brilkiko.
Letterer Azerzo chicken headmilk...
Hus Hot Prot Derstuk Jupjup.
Jupjup?
It can contain drugs.
And you can also
smuggle people in it.
He says that criminals
are very creative.
Stolk Frit Berga
Wollewulle Greta Verre Grto.
Zwrelle Zwolle Polka Paai
Pluk Redidded Watteeuw.
He understands that it can be
annoying and sympathizes with us...
But everyone has
their task and this is his.
And what about Schengen's treaties?
Do they suddenly mean nothing anymore?
I have not been able to
say goodbye to her yet.
Would you do that?
They say that is important
For the grieving process?
It must be long and
lonely days for you.
You actually mean that you
don't like to walk in the rain?
I don't mind.
I like it
A little company.
But...
I've been thinking all
the time: your face...
I know that about something.
That is possible. I regularly
come to funerals lately.
Do you like breasts?
It's not what you think.
It is for the crossword.
I still have my own breasts.
Without silicone or
insulation material.
Bio-breasts actually.
Do you like Bio?
It is for the crossword.
That dryer takes 40
minutes. That is not so bad.
Thank you for the hospitality.
It is something else again.
Gelo Berdompung Vergaziris Fiscus.
Bollobom Discus Pertangkuns
Kluns Wuns Circus.
The last visitor was
the tax inspector.
That immediately meant
the end of the circus.
Nice stew.
Mopsi Tio Poessie.
Gripok Mulderta Vispit.
"It's tiger. I had to
do something with it.
Those are difficult
verb elections, I think.
Dropole Peuzot Ballatum Argenti.
Glasses Kil Fax.
He could cycle and dance
Tango. It was a top animal.
Fril Dulk Hillebulle Versu...
Pilko Lolde Derwus.
Kol Berankankentit Slurfik climbs.
If you want, you can
take some meat home.
My freezer is full of elephant.
Sex Pompo Kilo.
Kedu Jojo Floflu.
About 600 kilos.
I just don't get that.
Artificial insemination was
not an option for your mother.
She didn't want children
from a preserving jar.
I don't know who of the two
I should feel the most sorry.
I think it's all so pathetic.
You see it much too gloomy.
That's how it goes. Love.
That is easier than friendship.
And it is still
difficult to repair.
I think it is cunt that Kaat knows by
whom she is conceived and not me.
Fathers, you really have
to know it, Do you think?
Too crazy.
As long as you don't think...
That you will get the house.
Go live with him.
Get tied up...
In his gynecologist's chair.
And in the meantime
let him fuck well by him.
Hopefully...
you get a thousand...
ten...
Hopefully you will get a hundred
thousand stillborn children from his.
Which I will all refuse to bury.
You can...
drop by the wheelbarrow
in the cemetery.
And you know...
Do you know what I'm going to do?
Nothing.
I'm going to... Let it
rot above ground...
Until the whole earth stinks...
To your deception.
Whore.
Trut.
Slut box.
Cats... cunt... cli...
Skew -sagged garage holderalmanak.
Very good.
Yes, that's really good.
Doing.
- Yes?
Yes, do.
Oh dear.
Everything okay?
Not actually, no.
The animal does not want to start anymore.
That was to be expected.
Poorly maintained...
Totally worn out...
And rejected.
My boss doesn't want
to invest in it anymore.
I called him this morning with
Pipo de Clown's phone, but...
That car cannot
save him Lalali Lalala.
That is typical for
funeral directors.
They live on when something breaks.
And what now?
There is already someone on
the way to help us out of trouble.
That will probably take a long time.
No panic, bass.
We are in West Wettelen
within more than an hour.
And then it's not that far anymore.
I almost had peace
with it that it didn't exist.
He said he had to
fire the magician too.
Due to disappointing income.
Blablabla.
So... that clown doesn't know either...
How to get to each other
back in two sawn people.
Are it going, a Tantetje?
Not too much pain?
If I didn't take him...
he would also end up in the
freezer, Next to that elephant.
But maybe you should
take him with you?
I think he is more for you.
For you only then.
Incidentally...
That is useful for the
maintenance of your lawn.
You will be happy with it.
Does he have a name?
Christine.
And does he eat grass?
Yes, what else do you think?
Camel chunks?
There is no grass
in the desert, is it?
How would you think that?
The camels have
eaten all of that.
Hello there.
Yes.
So this is it?
Legal.
This is it.
Weird.
And do you know where a cemetery is here?
Legal has no cemetery.
Legal has no cemetery?
Legal has no cemetery.
And you say that now?
Every cemetery once
started with a first grave.
Yes.
That's true, yes.
I have to piss.
Wait, I'll help you.
Well...
You are love,
Deep as the sea...
ready as a grain gin,
stronger than death.
Don't let go of one human child.
You who don't forget a name...
No matter how hard to
spell or modern that may be.
You, who don't despise anyone.
Don't leave death, who
separates everything and hurts...
just be forever.
Give us the liberation
of that second death.
You who spoke to us...
For those who are defenseless...
And for their namesakes
in our midst, to say...
The refugees, the strangers...
The lactose sensors.
Don't let us go empty
and lost and without insight.
We know, the bottle near...
The easy sinking.
Do us like a willing
mussel open...
For the vision of peace that has
been calling us since time immemorial.
But...
Can I sit down?
- Naturally.
I didn't expect you here.
Man, that's a long time ago.
You were a source of
joy for me, Christine...
And you will always stay that way.
All I have to do for that...
Is thinking about you.
Remember things.
Like that time when we
were together in Tunisia...
And you claimed to
reincarnate later in a camel.
By the way, I have to get
used to that, Christine...
To the idea that
you are now a camel.
During that trip you received
a legendary attack of diarrhea.
None of the two knew then...
That you could get
the diarrhea so hard.
The couscous rang
out like a waterfall.
But it was with a
meter -wide smile...
And a positive attitude...
That you spent that entire
journey on the toilet bowl.
She has another.
A gynecologist.
That is completely
the opposite...
from a funeral director.
Well...
I put it on a drink tonight.
I fell asleep on the couch.
I haven't heard my alarm clock.
A gynecologist, damn it.
That's intense shit, man.
And I just believe that
she had to check so often.
Yes... the cervix.
She had the age for it.
To have a neck?
Very, isn't it?
We will stay
together here forever.
Who do you mean by us?
We.
All of us.
The whole family.
There is also room for the partners and...
The children if they might come.
The grandchildren.
Pets.
And we are not allowed to
decide on our last resting place?
A dead person has never
been able to decide anything.
Mama didn't really
want to be buried at all.
She wanted to be flamboyed.
In Cognac.
She always said that to me.
If she had drunk something.
Then she said that.
Dad, Antoine is here.
Is Antoine here?
- Yes.
Can I ask something?
Is it still possible to
put her right, please?
In bed she always
wanted to lie on the right.
That may be unusual.
I know.
It seems that most
women are left.
Apologies...
Notary Vercammen.
Can I talk to you?
What is the problem?
Yes... my sincere apologies...
That I come to disturb
you at this difficult moment.
Dieltje Christine
was my client...
Wait, should that be now?
Yes, I fear so.
This is her last will.
And it was her wish...
that she would not
be buried here...
But in law.
Pardon?
Where?
In law.
Can I see that for a moment?
Would she not have meant Wetteren?
She had some problems
with the 'r' sometimes, right?
What are you saying?
Mama had no problems
with the 'r' at all?
Where do you suddenly get that from?
Can I see it?
And where is that?
- Below.
And that certainly can't be a typo?
- No.
Well.
It is also typical mom.
Always think of an excuse for...
To not have to sleep yet.
No, I don't think it's on the map.
- Nothing?
Also not on the internet.
And I get all the time:
"Do you mean Wetteren?"
Maybe a strange question.
Does anyone happen
to know where Legal is?
Legal?
Yes.
- With an 'l'?
Yes.
- Naturally.
So legal exists?
Otherwise I wouldn't
know where it is.
How do you know where
Legal is, But not the GPS?
You will have to ask the GPS.
I used to be a taxi driver.
Customers are much
friendlier when they are dead.
That's why I switched.
And is that far?
Legal?
- Yes.
Is not too bad.
Walking, I mean.
Walking or by bike,
It stays just as far.
Don't I get a kiss?
Hey.
- Hey.
You look good.
What is the case with you?
Great.
I have just seen the grave
where I will someday be located.
It looks good.
Big.
There is a piece of land around it.
No WiFi for the children,
So that becomes difficult.
I didn't know you already had children.
No, but they already have a grave.
So I will have to make it now.
Yes.
Legal exists.
Okay.
- Yes.
The driver knows where it is
he says.
Are we going to
bring Mama to Legal?
Yes, if that was her last wish,
I think we should respect it...
And then we have to do that on foot.
How long are we going to do about that?
That is not neat to ask.
Unless you have to bring in
an important contract tomorrow.
According to that funeral
it is a few days of walking.
He can't estimate it properly
Because he is not a walker, he says.
We really go for several days...
Walk in the exhaust
gases of that hearse?
Yes...
Christine apparently wanted
to be buried there, so...
Don't ask me why,
I just hear it, but...
I loved her...
So I'm going to guide
her there. If necessary.
Everyone must determine for
themselves whether he wants to come.
Or can come along.
- Or can, yes.
And that in that wheelchair.
Have you ever looked well?
She doesn't look
really fresh anymore.
That is a customer that we have lost.
By you.
What you have lost Is
your empathy for the living.
And something else: it is not possible.
That car has to go to the
inspection this afternoon.
Bunch of failed garage owners,
Goddamn.
Completely rejected.
They can kiss our balls.
Shall I take it over for a while?
- Yes, is good. Thank you.
Have you actually talked to Dad?
That is difficult.
Why did you suddenly
have to leave our family then?
Do you know that?
I have many problems
with my health...
and I have to go from the
doctor Take 7,000 steps a day.
Hence...
She wasn't just my client...
Of course I also knew
Christine very well.
Personally, I mean, right?
Yes?
We sat together on wheelchair basketball.
So right?
Played Christine wheelchair basketball?
Yes, fifteen years.
Just like her sister.
Christine wasn't in
a wheelchair, is it?
Surely a bobsleigh does not
go to the baker in his bobsleigh?
Isn't that something completely different?
You don't have to be disabled
for wheelchair basketball.
That is not mandatory.
And if you tackle it smart...
Arrange a disabled
parking card in this way.
Christine did not have
a disabled parking card.
Because she has
not cleverly tackled it.
Wheelchair basketball.
I always thought that
was a stupid excuse...
To be able to do other things.
You're sure Kaat?
- Yes.
You don't really look like
your father But on Christine.
And you are?
I am Herman, I am a
childhood friend of your mother.
Ever since kindergarten actually.
I once caught in my pants.
And Christine smelled that right away.
She had a good nose, your mother.
- That's true, yes.
She could smell it at home if the
neighbors were
draining their cauliflower.
Really a very good nose.
But that was an incident...
I was bullied with it
That day at school.
Children are cruel against each other.
But Christine said to
me, "Herman," she said...
"You have packed in your
pants, isn't it?" I remember well.
I must have been about
five years old, I think.
'You have packed in your pants
and do you know what I'm going to do?
I'm also going to poke in my pants.
Then you are not the only one."
And then I knew: that
girl stays in my life forever.
Sounds in love.
Five years.
Yes?
- Yes.
Today we certainly don't save anymore?
I don't think so, no.
No.
Any idea where we can stay here
somewhere in the neighborhood?
I know something.
It's a two -hour walk.
Two hours walk...
Something cheap.
An adultery hotel.
Otherwise we should see
if we are welcome here.
HM?
- Yes.
Yes.
Yes...
It is a strict order.
I think they would rather
see candles than people...
But they understand
our exceptional situation.
So we can spend the
night here if we want.
There are fathers who have not
seen a woman for 50 years, so...
Keep that in mind please.
It is a resort of reflection...
But maybe that's good today.
Do they have a Trappist?
- Pardon?
Do they have a Trappist?
- You will have to ask them yourself.
Do they have sherry?
Let it go.
I don't really want to spend
the night here with pedophiles.
It is true: A Trappist
would now go into it.
I will stay with Auntie.
And where are you going to sleep?
They can go in the car if they want.
It is made to lie in.
I thought today.
It was a good
move from Christine.
My sister always
said what it was on.
I think so.
- And not Bas.
But she loved him.
But that silence from
him, That was on her.
She had a hard time with that.
The children.
Of course he has always known...
That he was not the
causative agent of his children.
It is not.
It is that his
children don't know.
And that he doesn't want them to know.
I have to stretch my legs.
Enough situated and sat today.
You have not changed anything yet, you.
Sorry I am disturbed in
your moment of reflection...
But can I ask you something?
Of course, my sheep.
Do you happen to have
those discreet wipes here?
You know
For the lost drops of puddles.
You have to pray, my child.
Prayer is always the right way.
I should have grabbed you in the house.
I looked away and kept silent.
I did that.
Sorry for that.
I understand those fathers, actually.
We allow too little
silence in our lives.
I don't know what it was
But I have deeper last night...
And being able to think more clearly
than ever about my life with Christine.
It was like...
I was able to merge all those years...
could trace an essence.
Yes.
That was a lot of sorrow...
But much more joy.
Yes.
Christine is no longer
there. It doesn't come back.
But I keep love.
I understand you.
Did you be able to sleep?
No, not really, actually.
That was disappointing.
A lot of noise came out of the coffin.
I've heard...
That you should not be near
a dissolution before the break.
I put it in perspective.
She used to snore.
When I thought about that
suddenly got something familiar.
Nice.
You haven't told much yet.
I don't talk so easily.
Unless I drank
Then I don't stop.
Or do I say the same four times.
I recognize that.
I recognize that.
So you are Mrs.'s notary?
Madam?
I never knew the deceased.
Maybe I will get to know
her. That cannot be excluded.
That is what everyone
is doing now, I think.
Do you also have a pedometer?
Or...
I am my belief in
those dating things...
And those apps lost.
I always swipe
to the wrong side.
Loneliness is
becoming harder for me.
So on my older day.
The cold in bed.
Sadly eating out alone...
And then everyone is looked at.
So...
I am looking for funeral
advertisements in the newspaper...
From ladies my age.
I'm going for the widowers.
Nobody has to be alone, right?
So I foam funerals.
Much more efficient than relationship
agencies. At least I hope so.
In any case, it is cheaper.
Do you have a woman?
I have two. Not easy
either, I can tell you that.
You probably don't do this often,
right? Spend the night for your work?
Since yesterday.
Yes, you have a point there.
Betty.
Frido.
Frido?
Frido Lesage.
11,430 steps today.
That is just as much as
mowing my grass seven times.
11,430 is not divisible by seven.
Everything is divisible
by seven. Even the love.
I hope they have a
guarded parking space here.
Those guests of the Vleeshenmafia...
are crazy about remains.
Trade in intestines.
Fat by hand soap.
You don't want to know
what they do in Frikandellen.
You won't be the first...
Who without knowing
it your father ate.
Sorry it took so long.
But it's like this: there
are enough rooms for all of us.
The thing is that there
is a party room below.
And there is a wedding party tonight.
So yes, we will probably
hear that music in our room.
The bridal couple said that
we are welcome at their party.
Those who feel
like it, Naturally.
And there is food, so yes...
You didn't have to
say Christine twice.
He had already been
on that dance floor.
I think so too.
- Is there a Trappist?
Is there sherry?
A Trappist would now go into it.
Is there a secure
parking space here?
I don't know.
I will ask that.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I sometimes think it's time...
That you tell where you
suddenly come from, Antoine.
From the veranda.
From the porch?
From the veranda.
We will never see you again...
Mama dies and you are suddenly there.
While I don't think anyone
has sent a death notice.
We didn't have your address.
Thank you.
Hey.
Do you have a minibar?
Good idea.
It's already a drink time.
Sit down.
- Yes.
The favorite cocktail of your mommy.
The multi-cult.
Everything that contains alcohol.
Even aftershave.
Only, one golden
rule: never fruit in it.
Too healthy.
Mama could do that much better, but yes.
Like this.
Cheers.
- Cheers.
On Mama.
On Mama.
Dad, what's this all?
Your mother's funeral.
Yes, a funeral of a few days.
And Antoine who suddenly
comes to the surface.
All unknown people
who walk along...
Like that woman with that glasses.
Who is that?
- Don't know.
He didn't say
anything to me at all.
Yes, your mother was a...
A good director...
Don't know.
Maybe she wants to tell us something...
And is this her encore.
Don't know.
A gigantic, thick, Warm
placard in my pants.
So that scent, that autumn scent,
It spread throughout the class.
Everyone smelled it.
I was about to be
humiliated totally public...
And at that moment Christine
herself farted in her pants.
Out of solidarity.
And that is something
I will never forget.
Frikandellen.
When Christine and I got married...
there were veal sweetbreads.
Grilled in an Argentinian way.
Do you want my frikandel?
I just went to ask if
you want my frikandel.
Shall we exchange?
Is good.
He will put things up.
And from Dad he
used to be on balletles.
Why not actually?
You get tendinitis from that.
And kapsones, of course.
Mama had been on the
dance floor for a long time.
And her clothes have taken off.
She always ended in her underwear.
- If you were lucky.
No, you don't get me
sober on the dance floor.
Waiter, five multi-culti's,
Please.
He was tasty, your frikandel.
Is it not possible?
Is it going?
I don't want them to make
my mother Frikandellen.
Let it go.
That betty said something like that.
Have you already seen that
they have a swimming pool here?
I usually don't take my
swimwear to a funeral.
Swimwear.
Can you explain to me the
usefulness of wet clothes?
You were right.
Even that bathing cap is mandatory.
Then you might as
well say that I have lice.
From above and from below.
You are now going to tell
me what you have to say.
Or I squeeze your balls off.
Your parents loved each other.
But Bas...
It has a problem.
Always had.
He is asexual.
Is he impotent?
He has a body...
But that only serves
to digest his food.
Do you just tell me that
my father is not my father?
It's like that.
Christine wanted sex.
And she wanted children.
And she wanted to keep Bas in her life.
But after two children
from another...
Bas wanted a kind of
symbolic child of their together.
Say it is not true.
It's not true.
It should not be true too.
You couldn't.
I should not be allowed too.
I couldn't.
Oh no, say it's not true.
It's not true.
It is because of those
multi-culti's, of course.
You don't have to
justify yourself, estimate.
It is your wife's funeral.
Then some things are more
difficult. I understand that, estimate.
It is nothing to be ashamed of.
Treasure? Do you say treasure to me?
- It's okay.
Forget it.
But I have nothing to forget
Because nothing has happened.
Shit, that's intense.
My mother is dead and
my father is not my father.
Come, we have to go.
They are probably already
waiting for us outside.
Betty.
You could say Betty so beautifully.
Up, get ready, Betty.
Come on.
Otherwise we are too late.
He's there.
Then we will go again.
Please blow, please?
That's good, thank you.
Positive. When
did you last drink?
Yesterday.
- Yesterday?
Multi-culti's.
- Multi-culti's?
Grab your papers,
Then you can come along.
Just sign here, please.
Can anyone drive you again?
I spent my driver's
license for a few hours.
You smell like sex.
I have to buy sports
shoes somewhere.
You cannot bury your
mother in law in heels.
I wish I also smelled of sex.
At least if legal already exists.
I wish I also smelled of sex.
What is the plan?
- Well.
You get hungry from all that walking.
I don't understand that members of
a walking club are not much thicker.
And that's the first thing you
say? After more than two days.
I was not good enough
for you as a foster child.
Too stupid, too rude.
Unacceptable.
So you just glued me out.
Do you know how that feels?
To be thrown out
of a foster family?
You are just a dog that is
saved from the shelter...
Through a nice and sweet family.
And the following summer
the family will travel...
And they tie you to a tree.
That's what you did, Bas.
And all those years later you see me again.
And what do you ask me?
And what do you tell me?
That you don't understand why
members of a walking club are not thicker?
You managed to pull
yourself off from that tree.
That is very handsome of you.
There was only one
way to pull me loose.
That was with Boom and all.
I still carry it with me, that tree.
That's heavy.
What about your
parents' heroin addiction?
Good.
They have both been
successfully kicked off.
In the cemetery.
Do you know which
dog would suit me well?
A Maltese, I think.
Why?
You have people who
process their grief by eating.
Not me.
I am not like that.
I am not hungry when I am alone.
I am more of a party eater.
I am a party person.
Twice the mussels.
- Thank you.
Please.
- Thank you.
Lord, open us like
a willing mussel...
For the vision of peace that has
been calling us since time immemorial.
Enjoy your meal.
- Enjoy your meal.
I knew you would take mussels.
- Is that so?
I sat around a bit this morning.
I thought very deeply
and I think I understand.
I am the only one in the
family who likes mussels.
Didn't I have that from someone?
'You don't really look like your father
But on Christine."
Are there things I need to know?
Hereditary diseases or something,
What I have to be vaccinated against?
Perhaps the bacon disease.
Bacon spit disease?
- Yes, that's nothing bad.
Our rochels are a bit thicker,
A bit fatter than normal.
But you can live with
that and tongues with that.
But it is very hereditary.
That is.
I don't know if you realize it
But I have packed in my pants.
I smell it, yes.
As a father you have
never done anything for me.
You will not succeed
anyway, but...
I would like it if you
supported me a little more.
Please.
But...
The thing is...
- What?
What is the thing?
Is there something that is
more important than paternity?
No, of course not, but...
It shouldn't be.
Italian quality.
First pressing.
Does Bas know you know?
No.
And I would like to keep it that way.
He is my father and
he remains my father.
Does he know that you have conceived me?
How's the intestines?
- They already simmer.
Come on.
Does everyone have their passport?
Passport?
Is law abroad then?
Legal is abroad.
Not deep.
Not far.
But abroad.
Why have you not said that before?
I am rather insensitive to boundaries.
Insensitive?
Borders are arbitrary.
A hold for narrow -minded spirits.
I think, huh.
Passport?
Kolo Padere US Differron Me Oplikegert
Bastorde Klomp Sausst Yukelelelele.
Anyone?
He says that the contents
of the box must be checked.
But... that is not possible.
He can't mean that?
Jordelo Moportuti Holkerdu Brol.
Daftirde Brilkiko.
Letterer Azerzo chicken headmilk...
Hus Hot Prot Derstuk Jupjup.
Jupjup?
It can contain drugs.
And you can also
smuggle people in it.
He says that criminals
are very creative.
Stolk Frit Berga
Wollewulle Greta Verre Grto.
Zwrelle Zwolle Polka Paai
Pluk Redidded Watteeuw.
He understands that it can be
annoying and sympathizes with us...
But everyone has
their task and this is his.
And what about Schengen's treaties?
Do they suddenly mean nothing anymore?
I have not been able to
say goodbye to her yet.
Would you do that?
They say that is important
For the grieving process?
It must be long and
lonely days for you.
You actually mean that you
don't like to walk in the rain?
I don't mind.
I like it
A little company.
But...
I've been thinking all
the time: your face...
I know that about something.
That is possible. I regularly
come to funerals lately.
Do you like breasts?
It's not what you think.
It is for the crossword.
I still have my own breasts.
Without silicone or
insulation material.
Bio-breasts actually.
Do you like Bio?
It is for the crossword.
That dryer takes 40
minutes. That is not so bad.
Thank you for the hospitality.
It is something else again.
Gelo Berdompung Vergaziris Fiscus.
Bollobom Discus Pertangkuns
Kluns Wuns Circus.
The last visitor was
the tax inspector.
That immediately meant
the end of the circus.
Nice stew.
Mopsi Tio Poessie.
Gripok Mulderta Vispit.
"It's tiger. I had to
do something with it.
Those are difficult
verb elections, I think.
Dropole Peuzot Ballatum Argenti.
Glasses Kil Fax.
He could cycle and dance
Tango. It was a top animal.
Fril Dulk Hillebulle Versu...
Pilko Lolde Derwus.
Kol Berankankentit Slurfik climbs.
If you want, you can
take some meat home.
My freezer is full of elephant.
Sex Pompo Kilo.
Kedu Jojo Floflu.
About 600 kilos.
I just don't get that.
Artificial insemination was
not an option for your mother.
She didn't want children
from a preserving jar.
I don't know who of the two
I should feel the most sorry.
I think it's all so pathetic.
You see it much too gloomy.
That's how it goes. Love.
That is easier than friendship.
And it is still
difficult to repair.
I think it is cunt that Kaat knows by
whom she is conceived and not me.
Fathers, you really have
to know it, Do you think?
Too crazy.
As long as you don't think...
That you will get the house.
Go live with him.
Get tied up...
In his gynecologist's chair.
And in the meantime
let him fuck well by him.
Hopefully...
you get a thousand...
ten...
Hopefully you will get a hundred
thousand stillborn children from his.
Which I will all refuse to bury.
You can...
drop by the wheelbarrow
in the cemetery.
And you know...
Do you know what I'm going to do?
Nothing.
I'm going to... Let it
rot above ground...
Until the whole earth stinks...
To your deception.
Whore.
Trut.
Slut box.
Cats... cunt... cli...
Skew -sagged garage holderalmanak.
Very good.
Yes, that's really good.
Doing.
- Yes?
Yes, do.
Oh dear.
Everything okay?
Not actually, no.
The animal does not want to start anymore.
That was to be expected.
Poorly maintained...
Totally worn out...
And rejected.
My boss doesn't want
to invest in it anymore.
I called him this morning with
Pipo de Clown's phone, but...
That car cannot
save him Lalali Lalala.
That is typical for
funeral directors.
They live on when something breaks.
And what now?
There is already someone on
the way to help us out of trouble.
That will probably take a long time.
No panic, bass.
We are in West Wettelen
within more than an hour.
And then it's not that far anymore.
I almost had peace
with it that it didn't exist.
He said he had to
fire the magician too.
Due to disappointing income.
Blablabla.
So... that clown doesn't know either...
How to get to each other
back in two sawn people.
Are it going, a Tantetje?
Not too much pain?
If I didn't take him...
he would also end up in the
freezer, Next to that elephant.
But maybe you should
take him with you?
I think he is more for you.
For you only then.
Incidentally...
That is useful for the
maintenance of your lawn.
You will be happy with it.
Does he have a name?
Christine.
And does he eat grass?
Yes, what else do you think?
Camel chunks?
There is no grass
in the desert, is it?
How would you think that?
The camels have
eaten all of that.
Hello there.
Yes.
So this is it?
Legal.
This is it.
Weird.
And do you know where a cemetery is here?
Legal has no cemetery.
Legal has no cemetery?
Legal has no cemetery.
And you say that now?
Every cemetery once
started with a first grave.
Yes.
That's true, yes.
I have to piss.
Wait, I'll help you.