West and Soda (1965) Movie Script

I've been not in a cot cat and damned
have they being looked scared...
ehi you moviesh girl are all come along
or you're nervous, are you?
I'll kill the first move living guy who talks.
- Ah! Gear, me too! Ah ah.
Gosh see something, oh...
we are just kidding fellows good boy,
have a good time and don't mind us...
- Worms
- worms
Ehi you whisky! Give a couple of
others so we can drink
at the only guy who's better
than we are the big boss.
Yes, the big boss, too pity it's pink.
- Get your hats off!
- Worms
- Cheers
- Cheers
- Cheers
- Worms
Go down coward, which you...
finally fool.
Chicken soft music to the ears:
The voice and his world.
She is a pure real sunlighter in this
miserable place of eat and drink.
See how she struggles for her bread...
You are cute abelard... so masculine,
you bring up strange emotions in me.
- Ich! Ich! Ich!
- You bring up the poetry in me...
all I ask is a little kiss...
Someday you may over my heart but not too
fast or you humh mhm... may think I'm a fast.
Well who would know it... is a poet ehi
now I get it I guess I'm really with it
come Esmeralda don't be meak
plant a slurp on my cheek...
- Go, change yourself, fatty...
- Urgh!
Ich! Ich! Ich!
Well, I'm sure you, a big and strong man
want to talk about whatever
it is that big strong men usually talk about
and I know is nothing that will be fit
for my delicate ears. I'll be back later boys...
you creeps and if you think there's any of...
...be sure to give him my best.
Ehi... pianoplayer, silence ain't golden,
is dangerous,
I feel like hearing something real gay and
happy to match may gay and happy mood
- I want to hear lively tunes
- Healthy...
to go with a laughter and the
joiy of this joint, get it?
Mh... mhh... Come on, get the key...
now we're listening eh, eh, eh.
But I warn you, no clinkers,
I can't stand clinkers.
I warned him I'm a very sensitive fellow,
it's just the way I am something like clinkers
get on my nervs, anyway he did it on purpose.
Buy five foots boots, small box, probably
broke, so no oak playing time not line,
pattern and frighten charges can
be sent to the nearest relatives.
Ich ich ich
Out lorsh marshall, out lorsh we want it
dead or alive and you'll be dead.
- Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
- Ich ich ich
Whoever you are listen to me...
you shit, fire, murder...
everybody always wants advice...
It's four o'clock, assistants police
aren't back yet.
I might as well murder a fly...
...get up and fly!
Get out of my eye and fly, "fly"...
eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh... I'm the best gun
in the west and that's no chest.
Yeah! I'm known as the velvet finger.
Bright Broth G. Lie and Murder!
Oh! It's you marshall, well,
nice of you to decide to give me
your land eh, eh, eh, eh,
I'm almost sorry that I had
your house burnt down...
what's that another pianoplayer,
oh those noughty boys
Lands more precious than gold...
I want to own it all...
y lands, is mine as far as I can see,
except forthat small farm
and that's the only fertile piece
in the whole valley
but it belongs to darling Clementine
but soon it'll be mine,
now that I'm the only decent bachelor
in these parts she can't refuse to marry me,
I'll have her, her cosy house,
and watt's more eh, eh, eh...
that rich green, good land.
Simmer down, this is a disonest man,
I give you my word!
I promise that by tomorrow
you'll have that juicy pasture!
Good, Bravo,
long live our boss!
That's enough, knock it off...
thanks, I deserve it.
Here's... to new land,
have a drink boss.
What's that... whisky! We might as
well try it! GOD!!! God...
cubes! They reopened the hunting
season on stage coaches...
pull up your pants you sloba
and follow me.
It's time to keep our regular appointment
with darling Clementine.
My milk improves enormously with
Chaicosky's sex walzy music.
With my crop of cream will be the cream of
the crop as long as we don't have to put up
up with any more of that dreadfull rock and
roll, it just brings out the butter in me.
This music puts me to sleep, gives me
something with a hot rhythm,
something with a afrocuban beat,
something to make my troops...
How uddly-cuddly!!!
Ci, ci, ci, ci, ciici...
Socrate don't scare the chicky
and don't drink so much
you're getting to be a regular
Here comes Clementine...
it's that time a day. Milking time girls!
Clementine is such a good girl she
deserves the very best we can give.
Go ahead, I'll stay here ask for
her land and her hand,
if she refuses scare her and I'll gallop
to the rescue, she'll find me insistable...
- You must be in love! Ich ich ich...
- Aaaahh
Shut up, do what I say,
I'm the big boss.
When I was only a calf, I saw a rodeo once
and they had a marvelous way
of catching a bull;
twirled a rope and zum...
he has the bull by the horns.
You girls, if you ask me that's no way
to pick a husband they say
they not pick up bulls that way
they throw them down.
I wonder if Clementine
can catch a man that way!
But she's trying to scare the man away!
No, just bad men, that's not
a scare crow she is making...
that's a scare bandit. Frankly I'm worried
about Clementine if any of this group
wants her land but claimes after hand.
Well, he is ugly.
But being a man makes...!
Look girls! Here comes the assistants is...
Don't just stand there Dolly,
I'll be along, turn the allarm!
Oh ooh oh...
Are they coming to ask for my hand again?
Hello darling Clementine, our boss who's
hiding behind some rocks out there,
said us to ask you for your hand and
your lovely lace green patch of land...
You know this property is all he can think
of poor men he is going loco
with desire for it, he is dying for it...
He wants it so much that its killing him
and everybody else... bang, bang...
Kill your gruesome boys, gruesome...
any too quick for me...
Well, Slim the boss says to scare her
if she refuses, so lets start the show.
Ich ich ich
How can I stop them, what'll I do?
Hey, ol Bessy... away...
two... one... two... three!
Ich ich ich
Ehi, here, have a good cigar!
Those noughty bandits now, what did I do
with that gun, oh trey're making
me so nervous now where's the powder?
Come on, sister!
Yaaaaa... Yaaaaa... Yaaaaa...
Pull... pull, till it blows up.
- Ich ich ich ich ich
- Ah ah ah...
I certainly hope this is the right way to
load it... if it is I have to shoot that.
Give that back to me, give it back so...
I can shoot you...
You bully...
That's enough! Dear, gentle lady
forgive these repulsive children,
they're just loaded with hot spirits...
...get out of here! I'll take care of you later.
I'm the only one strong enough to
control them... but... deep down,
they are really not so bad,
they just need a kind hand
and maybe you also need a kind hand?
Or... you learn what could happen to you
and house if you turn me down.
made me your love will be a lot safer...
I love you darling Clementine
and I love your land, I have tremendous
plans forthe future of this valley,
tremendous spectacular plans,
and ljust happen to have one with me.
Look at that!
All of it will be ours.
What do you think of me now?
- May I speak frankly?
- Oh, I'm waiting anxiously for your answer.
You make me sick.
Hey Slim, the boss got a
little dizzy, take a look!
- It must be love!!!
- Maybe it was a lady's boot.
- Yeah, looks like he got a kick out of it.
- Right...
He, funny, his face is stamped
with soulful love.
Ich ich ich... It's made a
deep impression on him.
Ich ich ich...
Her attitude has left it's mark in
our minds and on my face...
...people of the valley today
Clementine turned me down,
forthe last time she has refused me her
sweet and love and her valuable land.
He did it! Hip, hip, urrah,
hip, hip the boss...
no one... a piece of land but
my patience has run out finally.
I don't like the way the boss shout,
we're in for more trouble than usual.
People you know my reputation as a
great lover of land among otherthings.
Cattivissimo... You are all of us!
You set them out forthe boss and you...
through tick and ticker.
All right, let me ask you something.
I want to know how deep is your loyalty.
Are you willing to be hit in the
face with a lady's boot?
Before you answer let me
put it to you differently,
are you willing to let your boss
be hit in his face with a lady's boot?
Now tell me, do you want me to be hit
in the face with a lady's boot?
- Nooooo!
- I didn't think you would
and so now we'll handle that little lady
the way we've handled the whole valley.
We change the last cinema in the stand
in the way of progress that your
Clementine does not outlook... up to know
but from tonight on she's got to find out
and is up to you to get up for find out to guess
this new entire valley orto get that little lady.
For he's a jolly good fellow,
for he's a jolly good fellow, for...
he's a jolly good fellow and so
said all of us, and so said all of us.
- The music of nature.
- The rain is very good forthe fields.
Some of you have a cigar?
I start liking cigars.
Dolly, please...
Oh, you are nothing but a worm, a snake,
coyote cat, get out of here, get out,
don't let me see you ever again!
Lh ih ih... Bye.
I wonder why the light didn't roasted you!
La la la m m m mmm la la la
Oh stranger, this place is busy
as an hotel, sing the alarm...
This time is loaded...
go away or I shoot,
two and a half...
two and three quarter...
two and seven eight...
is he dead already?
Darling, put on an appropriate record,
there is someone dead there.
Who is he? I've never seen him before,
he looks dead but,
if he is dead why does he feel smoking
and if he is not dead maybe he's alive,
that means he's not dead yet...
- Ehi stranger are you dead?
- Alive girl... only tired!
Why are you lying there?
- I fell off my horse!
- So I noticed!
Ljust rode 1381 miles...
I've got to get out, I can't stay here.
You can stay here, what's more
you need is rest and vitamins,
meantime tell me who you are, where you
come from, where're you going and why.
Do you really want to know all about me?
Well, don't think that
I'm interested in you.
Noooo... then why you're asking all those
questions, if you are not interested in me.
Anyway, my name is Johnny.
Oh... the more I look at him,
the more I want to look at him.
- Ssssssstt
- The more I want to look at him...
he's beautiful!
- It was an accident.
- I'm sorry, I shoot without thinking.
Mhhh... what a coincidence right now
I could use a fast gun like you.
No...! Anything but that don't ask me to
shoot that man I couldn't do it ever again.
- Why not Johnny?
- Complexxes! My past is chasing me!
Johnny why did you leave your guns at home?
Don't you feel unprotected without them?
Well to tell the truth,
I do feel a little naked.
I'm going to do a little shopping, but please
Johnny try not to get into any trouble
without your gun is going to be very hard.
Welcome stranger... oh, oh, ah, ah,
glad to see felling for us, down.
But watch yourself down, if we're
around you could get afraid. Lh ih ih
Yehhhh! Ehi you...
you down the bar with the hat,
ye I'm talking to you,
you're new round these parts...
am I right, tell me you fellow, where are
you from, uhm what do you know,
which way you end up, we're interested,
and now tell me something else you wouldn't
by any chance be a dirty government agent
would you? You know something Slim?
He must be a mushroom
that pops out last night.
A fresh little mushroom from...
nowhere, ah, ah, ah, ah,
I don't like strongsider strangers!!!!!!!
- They're fighting, eh?
- I fell so.
- Dirty fighting.
- It's their work.
Business looks good.
- Is he a stranger? Never saw him before!
I wonder how he likes the town.
It's mighty quiet...
they must have done someone in.
Sorrow, over six feet, long box, probably
broke sell an oak, best brest, first class
a packing freightining planting
charges to grease digger relatives.
Coward scandalous, shame on you picking
on a handsome honoured man.
Oh... you'll pay forthat.
Come on Johnny, lets go get your gun
and show those two horribles
drunkers they can't do this to you...
and I'm shocked at you Esmeralda...
giving such company.
But, I didn't pay the bill for
the juice I didn't drink.
You should have paid
those two bills instead!
When you're angry like that you seem to me
even more beautiful. Ah ah ah.
Lh ih ih...
Look at that, look what the stranger got.
Gold, shiny gold, it's a fantastic
nugget, you two found!
You mean, that I found,
I won't credible find again.
That idiot of Slim has
nothing to do with it.
Aaahhh! Do you think I'm nothing but an
idiot? I'll review a part, piece my face,
then I'll put upir fath hang up in the sun
and swink and fly in your...
bunk and nobody calls me an idiot.
Shut up idiots, put your brains to work
if either of you have got any! Ah...
I want him to tell us the way
to find the shiny gold nugget...
there must be many more where
he found this gorges little beauty.
I always had a weakness
for shiny gold nuggets.
I love them even more than I love land
and land is gold... Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah...
Oh! What a lovely silence.
Silence is more than anything
else a sysmatic phenomenon.
Ehi Johnny, what does it mean?
I don't know. Very often I don't have the
slighest idea what I'm talking about.
- I'm very curious about you Johnny!
- You think it!
I got that message when you started
cross-examined me, so...
face my slightest phisical imperfection...
I've got... as you can see.
Tell me. Why are you complexed?
Did you kill someone?
- Euh... I shoot.
- Did you really?
Crazy, you don't look like a killer.
Who did you shoot?
Oh, well, my best friend.
He was going to kill me.
Did you ever consider going
to an analyst?
Sure I did, it was my analist that I shoot.
The moment I killed him I destroyed
all my feelings of violence...
from then on I never shot another man,
- I only shoot at tin cans.
- Only at cans?
Cans. Bang, bang, you see, full sight.
It's too bad Johnny,
because you shoot so well.
I never miss.
Look at this shot, bang, bang and
watch this one, bang, bang, see?
With a little practice any one
can learn to shoot without a gun.
You're strange, you're
even a little luny.
You think so? You are the first woman who
understands me. That's why I feel at home.
How long have you know your
analyst before you did it Johnny?
Five years it was and then I've shot him.
Long time, what made you wait so long?
What a domestic scene as he will whisper
sweet nothing listen to your ears.
Well Clementine?
May ask one question?
No, I've already told you...
I rather die than marry you.
So long, this question is for
the brain thincancelor.
Will you be so kind to honour us
with your company,
so we can have a little time to talk. Well!
Time is wasted are you coming?
Oh chiven!
...You know, your name sure fits,
you are a gruesome!
Ahh... Ah! Ah! Ah! I get to control myself...
I want him to die. Grr grr grr.
Lh ih ih.
Ah ah ah.
Patapim patapam...
Ah ah ah.
There you are... knocking
is confortable... ah ah ah.
Ah!! Ah!!
- And what if I don't talk?
- You're dead meat.
All right come on, hold the prey away,
lets go!
Well... we've particularly waited 7 days
for you to answer, have you changed
your mind and decided to talk?
Where did you find this nugget...
Anyone who shoots to an unarmed
isn't wortherto be talked to!
I'm not interested in your opinions,
I want you to tell me
where you found this gold.
Ehi boss, I've got a groovy idea...
why don't you let this massacre
to Government's agents?
We've done such a good job we can get
an incent credit for it. Ah ah ah.
Your groovy idea is square, forget it...
There are other way to kill him
that are very interesting
let me show you the way they work,
- I guarantee he will be dead for good.
- No,
I'm trying to make to you coward talk
and to do that he's got to be alive
but I don't think we'll have to
waste much more time on him,
I'll turn the jof overthe real experts,
there are some busy ants around here
that can make a stone talk.
All right girls, go to him
have a good meal.
Now listen to me horse face,
it wan't do you any good to try to stop...
those ants with your fancy cigar...
they only get madder or angrier.
Just tell me where you found that gold nugger
and you can sleep in a better bed tonight.
Look stop trying to make like a hero,
you don't impress me at all. TALK!!!
Frankly ljust feel very causy down
here whenever I've gone to the beach
I've enjoyed been embared to the sand.
Ehi... look Slim
the coward has some courage.
Well, but it won't last... they ask already
for another charge. Lh ih ih
Come on, spit out the name of the mine,
ah ah. You only have a few seconds left.
- Now what they are going to do now...
- Hush!
Did he escape?
It's true... take a look.
- There's no long gone.
- He's gone. You let him slip, you...
He's gone away... forthis... I should hang
you forthe rest of your miserable life.
Oh, I've got to know where to find
that nugget I can't stand not knowing...
he's got to be made to talk,
rack your brains!
What would we do now.
I've just a groovy idea.
Well, let's hear it!
Why don't we go to town and
ask the help of beautiful Esmeralda.
Esmeralda, how come you thought of her?
It's natural isn't it?
I'm sure you know women
have special ways for make
a man to talk. Lh ih ih...
Johnny, hallo handsome cowboy, yes...
you come on Johnny I've something
important to tell you, come on...
- That was the ghost! He's still living!
- But let's keep crackebly,
our part of the job is for later.
Ehmm, ehmm...
Come in.
- It's allrights to come in?
- Oh, yes, come in, come on in Johnny,
be careful of the veils, they worth a
fortune, come in, here I'm, back to you...
uhmm, this arm is mine, so is the pendant...
now close the door...
you better shut the doorJohnny,
the lock is rusty for not being used,
youuu... pick a buu... mhmm!
I've a few things to ask,
a few questions about yourself and
one question about the gold nugget.
Come here Johnny,
come closer,
you won't be afraid of
Esmeralda won't you?
Come closerJohnny,
just a little step of...
and now talk to me about the mine. I'll
get a small fortune, never mind where!!!
- Which mine?
Go on! You certainly know what
I'm talking about, don't you?
Of course! The mine in which you've found
that big gold nugget you had around your neck
and that you shamefully let get stolen.
God knows how worth it must have been!
I didn't steal it's wrong,
I'm honest, I've got it for...
Oh, I can't hear you when
you are so far away...
No mine is involved.
I don't know what to do, he won't talk,
there'll go my reputation...
see what a gorges woman I'm Johnny...
now tell me where the gold mine is...
come on Johnny tell me
your little secret.
If somebody knows where Johnny is,
should tell me right away.
Johnny, Johnny, come with me
to the window hurry...
oh... dearJohnny was so toughtful to
come and see Esmeralda today... oh...
you make me so... with the
noughty things you're saying oh...
Johnny you're so sweet to me...
oh... don't say things like that?
You make me tremble with joy...
no no I can't get get away with you
don't ask me I can't... yes I know you
got me... you have to consider you haven't
told me where the gold mine is...
come on Johnny don't leave me like this...
Johnny, gruesome is
waiting forthe information
he's going to be mad at me.
The guys will beat me up...
And I thought you been kidnapped,
that you was waiting
to know that kind of danger but... all alone
you were in the cottage of that... that hoty,
and I thought you were honourable and decent...!
- Clementine, please let me explain...
- I get you up when you fell from your horse
after riding 1381miles
and then you treat me like this...?
- It's not true, listen...
- No, Johnny don't give me excuses,
they'Iljust be lie,
and I couldn't stand if you lie to me
on top of everything else
you're not betterthan other men...!
You are just a charger.
She is going too far,
she should never call him that?
The way she is treating that cowboy so badly,
I think whe must have a cosh on him...
Take yourthings and go away,
I never want to see you again Johnny...
I... I be better off myself...
Here you're...
you miserable... you Esmeralda
what kind of a woman you are
to let a man escape throught your window...
and you fool...
to let him run away right under your nose
I don't know what I should do to you
but it should be something very bad.
You don't know how to figure it.
I'll do it. The gold that man was keeping
is so worthy... I will be rich.
Land is gold but... gold is gold...
go ahead shoot him on the nose
you'll save me the trouble, shoot!!!
!!! Then I'll shoot you on the nose next!
Some indians just kidnapped Esmeralda.
They get what they deserves.
Now listen to me
Johnny is the man who escaped...
but Clementine hasn't... and by tomorrow
that rich green land will be mine...
I'll be in person the commander
of that operation
to make sure that this time the job is
done right... and I'm going to be rudeness...
Johnny... Help!
I shoot him down like a dog
...ih ih ih.
One doesn't shoot dogs I told him that...
get the pants...
my boots, my shirts,
gloves then the hat...
my two guns,
my powder...
Ah ah ah...
Clementina... so sorry and angry about
that small unfortunate incident,
courage my darling Clementine
I'm not going to divore you.
There is nothing to be breath of
ljust want to marry you... That's all!
You're ipocrit as well as gruesome!
Clementina, Clementina don't you think
you are exagerating?
Anyway you might as well agree to marry me,
you have no choice
you are not leaving this house
unless you do what I say.
Look what you get for husband... me.
Am I mostruously fascinating?
You are mostruously gruesome!
Gruesome you have the face
and manners of an ugly talk.
- Johnny!!
- Huhu!!
Now is our side turn.
Johnny, we are ready when you are!
You want us to bring them there for you
or should we wait out there.
Johnny, I'm so happy you
come back to me!
- He's running away!
- Sorry, I have to go.
Ehi, don't leave me out here
I want to see what's going on too...
Bang bang...
Those two are goig so hot and heavy
we better get ready for anything
like may be two customers.
- Now you can't see me.
- Shoot at me!
- They don't see you.
- I suggest you to light a match.
Oh, good idea!
Oh no! From 15 yards up.
You're supposed to feel it
when ljump like that.
Well, not if I can see you come just
because you are stupid on the job,
just enough stupid to catch him.
It's about time he get
not only what he just
deserves but the rest of his
last dinner as well.
There's our customer!!!
Go on he was here, I'm sure he was
right behind that light spot.
I think he wasn't, so you better leave out
the light spot and take a look under it.
Even without picking under it
I know what happen right here.
That body, by all legal and illegal rights
belong to us, and was not by some devel.
- What's that?
nothing we were just going the way back to
town, we'll see you later... much later...
Please give our regards to your
wife and kids, we've got urgent business.
Hurry up... away from here!
Well Slim, look who's
coming back to town,
our handsome cowboy all done
on a basic black like a crow!
Cra cra...
Another gun...
He's a regular clown.
Candy, peannuts, soda pop,
popcorn and gun robe.
I feel bad, I didn't realize my gun
after loaded kills after a fire.
Give me a tranquilizer!
But where that nugget come from?
From a delicious Company...
I found it into a soap box.