Who's Watching (2024) Movie Script
1
- Hey, everyone!
I'm Krista Healy.
I'm the new kid in
town, so thought
I'd just introduce myself.
From what I understand,
I'll be supervising
a small team, some
of whom I've already
had the pleasure of meeting.
My hope is that I'll
be able to teach you
a few tricks of the trade
I've picked up over the years,
and I am sure you'll be able to
teach me a thing or two as well.
What else?
I have my degree in art
history, which I have yet
to figure out how to apply
in any way whatsoever
to search engine optimization.
- Where did you graduate from?
- U of M. University of Montana.
- Montana?
That's where I'm from.
- Oh, nice.
Yes, as I mentioned,
I was transferred here
from the Billings office.
So are you--
- Uh, Caleb.
- Stop recording, you nimrod.
You're making her uncomfortable.
- Shut up.
I'm making a documentary.
- No, really.
It's fine.
You're Mr. Hanson's nephew.
I believe you're
on my team as well.
So, very nice to meet you.
- Brought this for you.
You inspired me.
Ah, this is where I live now.
When Mama passed away,
they sent me out here.
This is my-- my Nana, I guess.
She's my dad's mom.
I never even knew
my fucking dad.
Here's an old movie of him,
one of the only ones I got.
He's the one getting
all satanic and shit.
Hell yeah.
I think he's what made
my ma so religious.
She turned her life
around after him.
That scumbag was,
like, twice her age.
Well, there's Mr. Hansen.
Just a kid.
He's the reason I'm
a Hansen-Stanley now
and the reason I'm living here.
And he thinks he's
doing me a favor,
hooking me up with work
and a place to stay.
But really, he's
just too cheap to put
Nana in an old folks home.
So now I got to look after her.
Nana.
Nana, You want to
say hi to the camera?
Here's Uncle Larry, Mr. Hansen.
He's fishing for whatever the
heck is in this little pond.
Bluegill.
He's letting my band
shoot this video
at the crazy container
house thing his business
partner built.
- And you kids better
put everything back
exactly where you found it.
- I thought you said
he was moving to Peru.
- Yeah, what of that?
- Well, why would he give a
crap if anything's out of place?
- I hope you're not pulling
that camera out at the office.
- We are all the walking,
talking embodiment of our own--
- Hey, what do you
think you're doing--
- --unique experience.
- --Scorsese?
- Huh?
- What do you think
you're doing, Scorsese?
- 1, 2.
- Hey, Caleb.
Doc stuff again?
- Yeah.
Hey, Kris.
I was hoping I could conduct
a short interview with you.
- Oh, God, I don't know.
I'm seriously such
a dork on camera.
- Are you kidding?
You're-- you're fantastic.
And, hey, don't-- don't worry.
This this camera does
not add 10 pounds.
- Is it, um, work-related?
- Well, my Uncle
wants to make sure I
get a lot of good footage, so--
- Well, yeah, sure.
But don't you think we
should do this another time?
We really need to finish that.
- Sure, yeah.
This was my first camera.
Got it cheap at a pawn shop.
- Caleb?
Caleb, is that you?
Caleb!
Depraved, depraved,
filthy, disgusting boy!
Was your penis shown?
Ashamed of yourself?
Open the door.
Open the door!
- Is that, like, one of
those fake Japanese hats
where you turn it sideways and
it says something naughty like,
go F yourself?
- No.
That sounds cool, though.
- What does it say?
Anything?
- Can't-- can't you read it?
- So I know your uncle said
that this is OK, but, um,
I'm afraid if this turns out to
not actually be work-related,
we'll need to--
you know what?
Let's just keep it
quick, you know?
- It's work-related.
I mean, my uncle, your
boss, wants me to do it.
I'm taking this film class, and
that "Bowling for Columbine"
guy, he's--
he's giving an award
for best doc, so--
- Well, that sounds pretty cool.
- OK, let's get started.
Where do you live now?
What part of town?
- I'm on, um, just
the west side.
- Wait, are you--
are you married or something?
- Well, yes.
Yes and no, I guess.
Um, I'm separated,
uh, not by choice.
- So are you-- are
you dating anyone.
I mean, OK, come on.
It's not like I'm
asking you out.
And-- unless you want me to.
- Um, sorry.
What did you say this
doc was about again?
- It's-- Did I not
tell you that yet?
Oh, well, I didn't want to
let the cat out of the bag,
but it's--
OK, it's about transplants,
you know, how-- how lonely
it can feel when you
move to a new place.
I mean, I just moved here too,
you know, like, a year ago,
and I always felt kind of--
It's been kind of hard, so--
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So then, I guess, are you
interviewing other people
in the office?
Because I think Rebecca's
from Des Moines.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I am.
That's-- Rebecca?
That's a great idea.
Re-bec-ca.
- So--
- So--
- What?
- Are you dating anyone?
- Oh, um, I'm sorry,
Caleb, but that's actually
none of your business.
- I'm going to find
out one way or another.
Why don't you just tell me?
- No, I'm not dating anyone.
- What's your favorite movie?
- Oh, uh, I guess I want to
say when "Harry Met Sally."
But, no, I'm going to officially
say "The Sound of Music."
I watch it every Christmas.
- Wait, that's my-- that was
my mama's favorite movie?
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, she had-- she had
shitty taste in movies, but--
- Um, sorry.
Was your-- I mean,
is your mom, um--
- Yeah, yep, she croaked.
- Gosh, I'm-- I'm sorry.
Sorry, Caleb.
That's--
- So, do you, uh--
do you like other musicals or--
- So was it recent?
- Do you have any hobbies?
- I wouldn't exactly call it a
hobby, but I do play the cello.
- Wait a minute.
What do you play, the cello?
Are you-- you own on?
- Yeah, yeah.
No, I own one.
I've been playing
since I was six.
- You play the cello?
- Yeah.
- Oh, I play the bass.
I'm in a band even.
- Oh, Caleb, that's so cool?
What are you called?
- Toxic Cock Syndrome.
That's what my hat says.
- That's-- yeah.
Wait, so I just--
I just want to-- you--
you named your band
after a tampon infection.
- But cock.
Toxic Shock Syndrome.
It's metal, so you
have the metal name.
- You wouldn't happen to have
any, uh, female fans, would you?
- Oh, we haven't
played any shows yet,
so I don't really know.
But probably.
We probably will.
Probably even some groupies.
I mean-- so is it-- is
it hard to-- to play?
Cello?
- It-- it is hard to play.
But no, you catch
on after a while.
It becomes intuitive.
I'll have to show you
some pointers sometime.
- Really?
- Yeah!
Us musicians got
to stick together.
So what is this
going to be called?
Like, do you have a title?
- Yeah, I think so.
I was thinking I would call
it "I Have to Have You."
Just kidding.
That's not-- that's
not what it's called.
It's going to be called
"The Places You'll Go."
- Isn't that already
a Doctor Seuss book?
- Is it?
- Yeah.
- I don't know.
I'm still working on the name.
[screaming]
[heavy metal music playing]
- Look, there's like little
cat tails over there.
- Are they?
- Yeah, right there.
What's up, Pervo?
- Get out of the way.
I'm-- I'm filming the horizon?
- Yeah, you like these horizons?
- Oh my God.
- These are my bandmates,
Chris and Tony.
They rip.
Hey, you're going
to go swimming?
Jump in.
- Why don't you
jump in, freak show?
- Aren't we supposed
to be filming
a metal video or something?
- We are.
We-- we-- we will.
- OK, so then why are
you filming us instead?
- Why does anyone film anything.
I'm-- I'm documenting
the moment.
- Yo, Chris.
Beer me.
- Sure thing.
What are you doing?
Cut it out.
- Gotta quit being a skank.
Let him do his thing.
- Skank?
Jesus, Tawnia.
Who are these fucking tools?
I mean, who even
says skank anymore.
- I do when I'm making sweet,
sensual love to your mommy.
- You've been trying to fuck
my mom since the third grade.
- Shut up.
- You don't like this being
pointed at you, do you?
- No it's just it-- it's stupid.
I mean, what's the point of two
cameras staring at each other?
- Turn away, then.
I'm not stopping you.
I've got my subject
right where I want him.
I like watching you squirm.
- I hate fucking robot dancing.
[chatter]
- What did you ever
see in this twat?
Are you-- uh, is-- is
that your boyfriend now?
- Just Mike.
- But did you two go
to lunch together?
- Come on.
Dude, you're skeeving
everyone out.
- Are you going to
turn this thing off,
or are we going to
have to have words?
- Hey, Larry.
You know what?
It's-- it's-- it's fine, really.
- You asked me to come in today.
- And I'm-- I'm sure.
Hey, Caleb.
You're almost done
filming, right?
You're almost done?
- Is he your boyfriend
- Caleb?
- It's off.
It's off.
It's off.
What?
What the hell?
What the hell are
you all staring at?
This is just a normal morning.
Having breakfast
with my Nana here.
- Who are you talking to?
- The camera.
I'm talking to the camera.
- Why?
Where's Michael?
- Nana, he's dead.
- Then where's Larry?
- He's an asshole.
See?
Just a normal morning at Nana's.
- Who are you talking?
- I'm making a movie!
- You're talking to a movie.
- I'm talking to
my girlfriend, OK?
I'm talking to my girlfriend.
- Then I'm talking to Michael.
- OK, I'm Michael.
That's my good boy.
- OK, let me get you a reminder.
- Working hard or
hardly working?
- Gosh, Caleb, you scared me.
Why is your camera out again?
- I can't help it.
It was like, take
me to a pretty girl.
More pretty girl.
- Caleb, gross.
Stop it.
Seriously.
- Come on.
Can't you take a compliment?
Can you take a compliment?
- Do you want to get--
- It's getting harder and
harder to shoot at the office.
I guess it's time
for a new approach.
[music playing]
She stood amongst the
charred felled trees
The remains of a fruitful
wilderness now fruitless
She placed her
hand on my shoulder
As I downed upon one
knee, she christened me
In River Styx warrior
Mother, may I
Play with fire, fire
Mother may I
Played with death,
play with death
Mother, may I
Play with the bow
- We're at the
window of my house.
I looked out through my lattice.
And behold, a woman comes to
meet him dressed as a harlot
and cunning of heart.
[arguing]
- Fuck.
[chatter]
- Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Holy shit.
I've been working on
this, like, day and night.
Is anyone ever going
to see this even?
I guess you're
watching, aren't you?
I got some cool-ass fucking
gadgets in the mail today.
Yes.
Check this out.
Spy glass and night vision.
Oh, fuck.
Yeah.
OK.
Oh, fuck yes.
Nice.
OK.
Oh, fuck yeah Hey, Nana.
What are you doing today?
Oh, you're rollerblading?
Yeah, that's cool.
I wonder if I can get
prescriptions in here.
Fuck yeah!
- Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
[phone ringing]
- Oh!
Hey.
OK, yeah, yeah.
No, I'm-- I'm on my way out.
You realize how easy it is
to make a copy of a key?
You should keep a closer
eye on your purse.
[music playing]
- In the darkness,
I shall dwell well
until thou stir the bats of hell
from brimstone and mortar shell,
borne am I with
this tale to tell.
A maiden high up in
her tower, and I,
the beast of unknown power,
awaiting for that witching hour
to gnash and slash and claw.
[growls]
Fuck yeah!
- Did the power just go out?
- Yeah
- Shit, Nana, it reeks in here.
I guess I've been
shirking on my chores.
Nana, you need a bath, OK?
Get thyself clean, woman.
Hey, wake up.
Wake up.
It's breakfast time.
We got to do our bit.
Nana, come on.
[flies buzzing]
Nana.
Nana.
How was I supposed
to know she croaked?
I was at the container house.
I feel like I should say
some words or something.
Hardly knew her.
The lord is close
to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed.
- Nana?
How's it going today?
What is that smell?
You got mice again?
Mama?
Mama?
The heck?
Caleb!
Caleb, where the hell are you?
How did I let this--
Mom, I am so sorry.
What the heck?
Caleb?
Caleb?
Caleb!
Caleb!
[heavy metal music playing]
Dude.
Caleb, what the hell
were you thinking?
God damnit, Caleb,
where the hell were you?
Ah!
God damn it, you're as
worthless as your father.
Get out of my house!
(SINGING) Into your bed
You can't be greedy
- Fuck.
My keys!
(SINGING) Rats in the walls
- What?
- Where are you going?
- What do you mean?
What are you doing here?
- I thought you
were editing today.
- OK come on.
Get me-- get me out of here.
- What-- what happened to you?
- Just go.
Just get me out of here.
Go, go, go, go, go.
Come on!
How's the video looking?
- It's-- are you really
doing this again?
What can I say.
You guys look like a
bunch of sexist dipshits.
So, mission accomplished.
- Nice.
- So how's your creepshow going?
So you're like a total
incel, aren't you?
Come on, stop being revolting
for, like, one minute, OK?
- Come on.
You love it.
- You're going to get
what's coming to you.
You realize that, right?
- Absolutely.
[heavy metal music playing]
[karaoke music playing]
I lost control
My body's moving on its own
I watch myself walk away
A foreign spirit took my place
I'll
I'll disappear
I'll disappear
I'll disappear
[heavy metal music playing]
- (SINGING) In your basement
With all your toys
For girls and boys
Do they hurt
You work the streets
As the world sleeps
Hunting your brain
Will it hurt
Will it hurt
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Bite your scraps
Lest you're caught like a rat
One piece of cheese
Can't be so bad
Just one small thing
It can't hurt
Your poison spills
Across the land
The land
Does it hurt
Does it hurt
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Mind your traps
Lest you're caught like a rat
In the dark
Reap of night
He watches
Your every move
Take your time
For what's left
Oh, he does
What he does best
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Mind your traps
Lest you're caught like a rat
[indistinct voices]
- I was reading this
article about frogging.
You ever heard of that?
It's like when you have a
hider in your house, someone
living in your attic or
literally in your walls.
I love to-- to just touch your
things, to dwell in your space
when you're not around.
It makes me-- it makes it feel
like it's our place, you know?
[playing the cello poorly]
- You're so dumb.
We should have gotten
tickets beforehand.
- I don't know how
to do that shit.
- Did I leave that
light on when we left?
- Um, one second.
It's off now.
- I just-- I never
leave the lights on.
Like, that's so strange
- Oh, I bet I did.
- You're on my hair
- Oh, sorry, sorry,
sorry, sorry, sorry.
- Here, I'll get on that.
It's just-- OK, the other
night when I was leaving here,
I heard, like, a big
noise up here, and I--
it was the weirdest thing.
Like, you know when you
feel like you're not alone?
- Yeah.
- There's condoms
in the nightstand.
- You sure they're in here?
- Well, there were definitely
condoms in there at some point,
and I guess he was like, so much
as like, packed that as, like,
taped it up and threw
it in the U-Haul.
- Now what?
- We don't have a condom.
- OK.
Pull out.
- Like, no.
- Come on.
I won't even cum.
Promise.
- Mike, stop.
Seriously.
- What?
What's wrong?
- I am not worried
about getting pregnant.
- Oh.
- I'm going to take that shower.
- Oh.
- You can still stay
over if you want to.
- I'll take you up on that.
Fuck.
[indistinct music playing]
- Hey, what are you
doing out there?
Moping?
- Yeah, kinda.
- Wash my back?
Keep me company?
- Babe?
- Hey, are you just
going to film us,
or are you going
to actually help?
- Yeah, I'll help in a minute.
- You're the one that
wants to go camping so bad.
- What do you call a drummer who
breaks up with his girlfriend?
- Homeless?
- Dude, don't ruin them!
- OK.
How do you know when a
drummer is at the front door?
- He doesn't know
when to come in.
- No, he says pizza's here.
- OK.
Tabby, this one's for you.
What's the difference
between groupie and a roadie?
- What is fuck off, Caleb?
- At least the roadie
gets paid after getting
fucked by the band!
- Oh, God.
- That's funny.
- You gotta do it.
You gotta do it.
[chatter]
- Uh-uh.
Mm-mm.
- Going to eat that stick?
- Yeah.
- Don't--
- Let me see that.
- That better not pass over.
- Come on.
- Better not pass--
- Give me the camera.
So, Caleb.
How did a Montana boy end
up in Nebraska, anyway?
- My dad grew up here.
- Yeah?
- Your dad was, like, a
total asshole, wasn't he?
- Yeah, I guess.
He was a cokehead and he, like,
ripped off a lot of people.
Paid child care.
Sent me a $100 bill on
my birthday every year.
- Aw.
So you like your daddy, Caleb?
- I don't know I never met him.
- Hey.
Up here, buddy.
- I can't help myself.
It's got a mind of its own.
- Haven't you seen
enough, horndog?
- Oh, pretty girl.
Oh, monster wants
to see more of you.
- All boys are
such peeping toms.
- Congratulations.
I decided to make a
movie about you now too.
- You will rue the day you ever
start that shit with me, Caleb.
- Oh, yeah?
I think maybe you want me
to start shooting you too.
- Yeah.
Yeah, that's it.
I'm just-- just really jealous.
- Hey, you want to come
to my tent with me?
- What, so we can
make a porno in there?
You really have, like, zero
radar for this shit, don't you?
- Well, then why don't
you just go to bed, then?
- Have you ever
heard of the phrase
men are afraid women
will laugh at them,
women are afraid
men will kill them?
- It's so cool.
- Yeah.
Yeah, that's you, dude.
- As you now know, I
had an ulterior motive
for this camping trip.
- What are you doing, freak?
Making your fucking movie?
- no, no.
- Get out of the car!
- No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
Hey, hey, no!
No, no, no!
- We knew it was you in
the woods that night,
you little piece of shit.
- Mike, stop it!
That's enough!
- What?
You think you pile of
shit deserves mercy?
- No, no, stop it!
Stop it, I said!
Get away from me.
Both of you get away from me.
- He's a pervert.
I'm only trying to protect you.
- I never asked
you to protect me.
Leave me alone!
[heavy metal music playing]
- For jealousy is
the rage of a man.
Therefore, he will not spare
in the day of vengeance.
[screaming]
- Please, I'm begging you.
Help me!
Please.
[distant screaming]
- How did you like my movie?
Lunchtime.
OK, come on.
Come on.
You gotta eat.
Krista you gotta eat.
Come on, it-- it's good.
Come on.
Mmm, mmm, it's good.
Come on.
Krista, you gotta eat.
Don't you have anything to say?
Not even a film re-- review?
Thumbs up?
Down?
How many stars?
Hey.
I am a nice guy, you know?
I made this movie for you.
For us.
I never wanted any
of this to happen.
I didn't plan on this.
But you know, it
started to dawn on me
that you were never going to
watch this thing unless, you
know, you were forced.
- Help, help!
- Quiet.
- Stop it!
Stop it!
- Shut up!
[screaming]
- Hey, you.
[barking]
Come here.
I didn't know we
had neighbors, bud.
Where's your owner?
Go home.
Go home.
Go, go, go.
[screaming intensifies]
- Hey, false alarm.
False alarm.
No worries, no worries.
There's no one for miles around.
You don't have to worry, though.
You're not going to be
here very long anyway.
- Are you going to kill me?
- God, no!
I am not going to kill you.
You're the star of my movie.
Quiet.
Just relax.
[heavy metal music playing]
- Sorry.
I'm, uh-- I'm late.
- Well, here it is.
If you're looking for
something turnkey,
this is the place with a
soundproof recording studio
that's Not even listed yet.
Here we go.
- Oh, this-- this interior
is incredibly solid.
- They don't build them
like they used to, do they?
- Spacious.
You could have a
whole setup in here.
Like, the bed over here and--
- Now you're seeing--
- --en suite bathroom over here.
- Now you're seeing
the big picture.
- A band could make a real
racket in here, you know?
- Yeah, and not a
soul would hear.
Well, except for the
lord above, that is.
- Amen to that.
[screaming]
- Hey, uh, Caleb.
Um, you haven't-- you haven't
seen Krista, have you?
- What?
Uh, um, no.
Why?
- Well, she's supposed to go
to my sister's baby shower
this morning, and
she didn't show up,
and she's not at her apartment,
and no one's heard from her.
- Oh, well-- well,
good luck with that.
- Uh, what are you up to?
- Groceries.
What does it look
like I'm up to?
- It's like you really-- you
really don't know where she is?
Because you-- you've been
stalking her, right I mean,
Mike caught you parked
outside of her apartment.
- You mean when
he did this to me?
That guy is a fucking monster.
Maybe you should ask
Mike where your pal is.
- Look, we know it was you
at Two Rivers last weekend.
- What?
Look.
Look, I-- I know things got
weird between Krista and me,
but--
but I've moved on.
Yeah, I've moved on.
You should too.
Don't worry about her.
Bye.
Krista?
Fuck!
Stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop!
Ah!
Fuck.
God damn it!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Where are you?
You bitch!
You fucking bitch!
Fuck!
[knocking]
- Shit, shit, shit.
[knocking]
- Hey, Caleb.
- Hold on.
Hold on.
I'll be right there.
- Caleb!
- Just-- just give me a second.
- Hey, you haven't been
responding to my texts.
What's going on?
- Um, I need a ride into town.
Can you give me a ride?
- Um, yeah, sure.
But what's up with
the itty bitty knife?
Are you OK? 'Cause you're
acting really weird.
- Uh-huh.
- OK, well, there was this
guy that came by my apartment
today asking me if I
knew anything about you
and some chick named Krista?
That's your girlfriend
or whatever--
- Wait, what?
- Yeah.
- No.
Um, who was he?
- Hey, Caleb!
Caleb, you're like,
completely unhinged.
What is going on?
Are you in trouble?
What, do you think
I'm recording you?
That's your perv shit, dude.
- OK, I really need your car.
I need your car right now.
- How did you get here?
Where's your car?
How did you get up--
- Give me your fucking keys!
- Caleb--
- What are you doing?
Cut it out.
- You gotta quit being a skank.
Let him do his thing.
- Skank?
Gang, Tawnia.
Who are these fucking tools?
I mean, who even
says skank anymore?
- I do when I'm making sweet,
sensual love to your mommy.
- You've been trying to fuck
my moms since the third grade.
Shut up.
- You don't like this being
pointed at you, do you?
- No, it's just--
it's stupid.
I mean, what's the point of two
cameras staring at each other?
- Well, turn away, then.
I'm not stopping you.
I've got my subject
right where I want him.
I like watching you squirm.
So Tony says that you're
making a movie for some mystery
girlfriend of yours?
- Yeah, I'm--
I'm documenting our courtship.
- Your courtship?
OK, Grandpa.
So, what's it about?
You're just making a
porno, aren't you, Caleb?
- Tawnia--
- --Tawnia.
- What?
No I-- she's-- we're--
we're not really dating yet.
- Oh!
- So what, you're
just stalking her?
Cool.
- No, it's not a documentary.
It's a horror.
It's about this guy
who's trying to make
this really beautiful film.
Then this skank he hardly
knows shows up and ruins it.
- Dude, I'd see that.
- Oh, so that's--
that's not a horror.
Something horrific
has to happen.
Like, the dude's nuts get
chopped off or something.
So what happens?
Does the girl get
her nuts chopped off?
- I guess you'll
have to wait and see.
[music playing]
(SINGING) The sky
lights up once again
Like some morning is for
- I could tell there was
something off about you
since that first day we met.
Tony's friends are
usually skeeves, but you?
You were different.
Skeevier, if that's a word.
You were too cocky about the
so-called doc you were making,
and you were hiding
something, but you
wanted us to know you
were hiding something.
Hubris is a salty
sardine, my friend.
- I thought you said
he was moving to Peru.
- Yeah, what of that?
- Well, why would he give a
crap if anything's out of place?
- OK, OK.
Cool your jets.
Don't get in a tizzy.
- What the hell?
What-- I didn't say
you could shoot me.
- Hey, hey.
Is this one of those tizzies?
- This is my movie, not yours.
Turn that shit off?
- Hey, man.
Relax.
She's not doing anything wrong.
- And if you must know, I'm
making a documentary for my film
class.
Michael Moore is supposed
to be coming and giving
a guest lecture, and he's
going to critique our movies.
- Did you say you're
making it about me?
- No, I'd like to
actually get a good grade.
- With this, I see everything.
I am like God and
the fucking devil.
- Um, You're delusional,
is what you are.
Hey, Caleb.
I've got a camera.
What's that make me?
I've been looking for something
more provocative to work on,
you know, other than
that usual film school
dreck like how my grandparents
met or, hey, look.
My cat's in heat.
So I decided, what the heck?
I'll follow this
dweeb around and see
what's really going on behind
this girlfriend documentary
bullshit.
- Fuck!
- Oh, what the fuck?
- Fuck.
- Well, clearly, I
had no fucking clue
what I was getting myself into.
So I figured that I would
share a little bit about myself
since we still don't really
know each other too well.
And that's what you did
in your little movie.
So-- but then it occurred to me
that you freaking disgust me.
I have zero interest
in you liking me
and zero plans on kidnapping
you and turning you
into my Hollywood
Barbie plaything
or whatever your
fucked up plan was.
OK, I guess technically, that
last part isn't entirely true.
Roll the tape.
I like movies and making movies.
I still live with my mom and her
weird, good-looking boyfriend,
which frickin' blows.
But I can't afford my
own apartment 'Cause--
- Mom, you're
supposed to ignore it.
- --I'm taking classes
pretty much full time.
And yes, one of them's
my documentary class.
And most importantly--
- Depraved!
Depraved!
Filthy, disgusting boy!
- I mean, seriously.
Were you trying to blame
your dead mom on all
that fucked up shit you pulled?
That's on you, Caleb.
You're the piece of shit.
(SINGING) Not used to this inn
20s and teens
Grabbing on the handrail
for everyone to see
Do you catch
yourself smiling now
When you find that
you do love whatever
Everything whenever you say so
Love used to inn
20s and teens
Grab it on the handrail
for everyone to see
Do you catch
yourself smiling now
When you find that
you love whatever
Everything whenever you say so
Hold your little hands up
Hold up, hold hands up
To your mouth, you will be far
To lay you down
Hey you lay down
- I really wish I
could unsee this.
(SINGING) Gonna lay down
Lay down
Hey, you're gonna lay down
You lay down
Hey, you gonna lay down
- And yeah, that was me.
[yelling]
- Just give it to
me on the inside.
Stalking a stalker is
weird and sometimes scary.
Shit, I think he sees me Hey!
What are you--
- What?
- What are you doing?
Where are you going?
- What are you-- what
are you doing here?
- I thought we
were editing today.
- My nerves are shot.
I gotta take a dump.
- Real nice, Caleb.
[toilet flushing]
- Don't worry.
False alarm.
- Oh thank God.
- How's the video looking?
- It's-- are you really
doing this again?
What can I say?
You guys look like a
bunch of sexist dipshits.
So, mission accomplished.
- Nice.
- So how's your creepshow going?
- Fuck you.
- What's the difference between
a bass player and a savings
bond?
One will eventually
mature and make money.
OK, what do you call someone
who hangs out with musicians?
- I don't know.
Maybe we should ask the chicks.
What do you prefer
to be called--
groupies or sluts?
- A bass player, dipshit.
Recognize a pattern?
- Sluts.
- Oh, OK.
What do you call a beautiful
woman on a bass player's arm?
A tattoo, bitch!
- I love, love
catching these moments
you choose not to include
in your little pervo piece.
- What the fuck?
- Guys.
- Kill it.
- It was a joke.
It was a joke.
- Give me the fucking book, man!
- I was starting to feel like
my little Doc was petering out.
I thought I'd try to put an
end to it once and for all.
Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
- Caleb!
What the fuck?
What did you do?
- Nothing.
It's just-- there's
just friends from work,
and I was going to
surprise them, but--
- Wait, is that why you
insisted on this spot.
- Please, if they come
here, you don't know me.
- The incident in the
woods made me realize
this shit was just heating up.
Something seriously
fucked up is happening.
Caleb is definitely going
to the container house,
and he's definitely not
supposed to be there anymore.
I felt terrible leaving
Krista tied up like this.
I tried calling the cops, but of
course, my freaking phone died.
I needed to plot my
next moves carefully.
Hey!
Hey, Doc!
Go away!
- Why are you--
Stop it!
Stop it!
- Shut up!
[screaming]
- Krista!
Krista, My name is Tawnia.
It's going to be OK.
I'm going to get you out.
All right, there
has to be a key.
There must-- Yes!
OK, can I just--
[sobbing]
- It's OK.
[sobbing]
- It's OK, it's OK.
[heavy metal music playing]
- Yep, this is your
surveillance camera I set up.
How's it feel, fucko?
- Fuck!
(SINGING) You stabbed
me in the chest
Over again, you
expect me to clean up
- Hey, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop, stop!
Fuck!
Fuck!
[yelling]
You bitch!
Fucking bitch!
[screaming]
- Jesus H, pull
yourself together, dude.
(SINGING) The sky
lights up once again
Like sun rays more than it's for
You know there
- Ah!
You bitch!
(SINGING) You saw me
It's that time once again
- Shit, shit, shit, shit.
Hold on.
Hold on.
I'll be right there.
Give me a second.
- You haven't been
responding to my texts.
What's going on?
- Um, um, I need
a ride into town.
Can you give me a ride?
- What's up with the
itty bitty knife?
OK, well, there was this guy
that came by my apartment
today asking me if I
knew anything about you
and some chick named Krista.
- Who was he?
- Hey, Caleb.
Caleb, you're, like,
completely unhinged.
What is going on?
Are you in trouble?
What, do you think
I'm recording?
- Car right now.
I need your car, please.
- Where are your keys.
How did you get up here?
- Give me your fucking keys!
- Caleb!
- What the fuck?
Fuck!
- Ah!
- You fucking bitch.
Let me out!
- Fuck you!
Fuck you!
Why?
You can't do this!
You can't do this!
No.
Somebody help me!
Somebody help me.
Krista!
Krista!
- You always said--
Whoever slays Cain, vengeance
will be taken sevenfold!
- Just shut up with
your scripture bullshit.
- Tawnia, please.
Come on, please.
What did I ever do to you?
- I knew that you
were up to no good.
I could just fucking tell.
But-- but you are
one depraved fuck.
- What is that?
What is that for?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You can't do this.
- Obviously, it's
a work in progress.
- Don't.
Come on, come on, come on.
Please I-- I like you.
I really do.
I like you.
- You like me?
- Yeah.
- You too?
- Please help me.
- These ought to help.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
- One for the money.
- No.
- Two for the show.
- No!
No.
- Three to get ready.
- No, no, no.
- Go!
[screaming]
- You're pathetic.
- Fuck you.
- Depraved!
Depraved!
- Krista, please, please.
Please, I love you.
- Filthy, disgusting boy.
Was your penis swollen?
Were you touching yourself?
- Mama, please.
I'll be good.
I'll be good.
- Do you know what happens
to filthy, disgusting boys
like you, Caleb?
- No, no.
- They rot.
That's what happens.
They rot and they rot until
their insides are just
puss and bile.
You disgust me, Caleb.
- No, no.
I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
Please, please.
I'll be a good boy.
I'll be good.
I'll be good, please.
I'll be good.
Please.
- How do you like
that fucking movie?
[music playing]
(SINGING) Curled up in a den
Who's left you for dead
A spot of blood on your wool
Wounded animal
Who got hold of you
Who knocked your thoughts loose
Always baring your teeth
Wounded animal.
Limping to your grave
Longing to be saved
You know I would if I could
Wounded animal
Wait a second, I'm a little off
Wait a minute, I'm a little lost
Would you reboot me, please
- Hey, everyone!
I'm Krista Healy.
I'm the new kid in
town, so thought
I'd just introduce myself.
From what I understand,
I'll be supervising
a small team, some
of whom I've already
had the pleasure of meeting.
My hope is that I'll
be able to teach you
a few tricks of the trade
I've picked up over the years,
and I am sure you'll be able to
teach me a thing or two as well.
What else?
I have my degree in art
history, which I have yet
to figure out how to apply
in any way whatsoever
to search engine optimization.
- Where did you graduate from?
- U of M. University of Montana.
- Montana?
That's where I'm from.
- Oh, nice.
Yes, as I mentioned,
I was transferred here
from the Billings office.
So are you--
- Uh, Caleb.
- Stop recording, you nimrod.
You're making her uncomfortable.
- Shut up.
I'm making a documentary.
- No, really.
It's fine.
You're Mr. Hanson's nephew.
I believe you're
on my team as well.
So, very nice to meet you.
- Brought this for you.
You inspired me.
Ah, this is where I live now.
When Mama passed away,
they sent me out here.
This is my-- my Nana, I guess.
She's my dad's mom.
I never even knew
my fucking dad.
Here's an old movie of him,
one of the only ones I got.
He's the one getting
all satanic and shit.
Hell yeah.
I think he's what made
my ma so religious.
She turned her life
around after him.
That scumbag was,
like, twice her age.
Well, there's Mr. Hansen.
Just a kid.
He's the reason I'm
a Hansen-Stanley now
and the reason I'm living here.
And he thinks he's
doing me a favor,
hooking me up with work
and a place to stay.
But really, he's
just too cheap to put
Nana in an old folks home.
So now I got to look after her.
Nana.
Nana, You want to
say hi to the camera?
Here's Uncle Larry, Mr. Hansen.
He's fishing for whatever the
heck is in this little pond.
Bluegill.
He's letting my band
shoot this video
at the crazy container
house thing his business
partner built.
- And you kids better
put everything back
exactly where you found it.
- I thought you said
he was moving to Peru.
- Yeah, what of that?
- Well, why would he give a
crap if anything's out of place?
- I hope you're not pulling
that camera out at the office.
- We are all the walking,
talking embodiment of our own--
- Hey, what do you
think you're doing--
- --unique experience.
- --Scorsese?
- Huh?
- What do you think
you're doing, Scorsese?
- 1, 2.
- Hey, Caleb.
Doc stuff again?
- Yeah.
Hey, Kris.
I was hoping I could conduct
a short interview with you.
- Oh, God, I don't know.
I'm seriously such
a dork on camera.
- Are you kidding?
You're-- you're fantastic.
And, hey, don't-- don't worry.
This this camera does
not add 10 pounds.
- Is it, um, work-related?
- Well, my Uncle
wants to make sure I
get a lot of good footage, so--
- Well, yeah, sure.
But don't you think we
should do this another time?
We really need to finish that.
- Sure, yeah.
This was my first camera.
Got it cheap at a pawn shop.
- Caleb?
Caleb, is that you?
Caleb!
Depraved, depraved,
filthy, disgusting boy!
Was your penis shown?
Ashamed of yourself?
Open the door.
Open the door!
- Is that, like, one of
those fake Japanese hats
where you turn it sideways and
it says something naughty like,
go F yourself?
- No.
That sounds cool, though.
- What does it say?
Anything?
- Can't-- can't you read it?
- So I know your uncle said
that this is OK, but, um,
I'm afraid if this turns out to
not actually be work-related,
we'll need to--
you know what?
Let's just keep it
quick, you know?
- It's work-related.
I mean, my uncle, your
boss, wants me to do it.
I'm taking this film class, and
that "Bowling for Columbine"
guy, he's--
he's giving an award
for best doc, so--
- Well, that sounds pretty cool.
- OK, let's get started.
Where do you live now?
What part of town?
- I'm on, um, just
the west side.
- Wait, are you--
are you married or something?
- Well, yes.
Yes and no, I guess.
Um, I'm separated,
uh, not by choice.
- So are you-- are
you dating anyone.
I mean, OK, come on.
It's not like I'm
asking you out.
And-- unless you want me to.
- Um, sorry.
What did you say this
doc was about again?
- It's-- Did I not
tell you that yet?
Oh, well, I didn't want to
let the cat out of the bag,
but it's--
OK, it's about transplants,
you know, how-- how lonely
it can feel when you
move to a new place.
I mean, I just moved here too,
you know, like, a year ago,
and I always felt kind of--
It's been kind of hard, so--
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So then, I guess, are you
interviewing other people
in the office?
Because I think Rebecca's
from Des Moines.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I am.
That's-- Rebecca?
That's a great idea.
Re-bec-ca.
- So--
- So--
- What?
- Are you dating anyone?
- Oh, um, I'm sorry,
Caleb, but that's actually
none of your business.
- I'm going to find
out one way or another.
Why don't you just tell me?
- No, I'm not dating anyone.
- What's your favorite movie?
- Oh, uh, I guess I want to
say when "Harry Met Sally."
But, no, I'm going to officially
say "The Sound of Music."
I watch it every Christmas.
- Wait, that's my-- that was
my mama's favorite movie?
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, she had-- she had
shitty taste in movies, but--
- Um, sorry.
Was your-- I mean,
is your mom, um--
- Yeah, yep, she croaked.
- Gosh, I'm-- I'm sorry.
Sorry, Caleb.
That's--
- So, do you, uh--
do you like other musicals or--
- So was it recent?
- Do you have any hobbies?
- I wouldn't exactly call it a
hobby, but I do play the cello.
- Wait a minute.
What do you play, the cello?
Are you-- you own on?
- Yeah, yeah.
No, I own one.
I've been playing
since I was six.
- You play the cello?
- Yeah.
- Oh, I play the bass.
I'm in a band even.
- Oh, Caleb, that's so cool?
What are you called?
- Toxic Cock Syndrome.
That's what my hat says.
- That's-- yeah.
Wait, so I just--
I just want to-- you--
you named your band
after a tampon infection.
- But cock.
Toxic Shock Syndrome.
It's metal, so you
have the metal name.
- You wouldn't happen to have
any, uh, female fans, would you?
- Oh, we haven't
played any shows yet,
so I don't really know.
But probably.
We probably will.
Probably even some groupies.
I mean-- so is it-- is
it hard to-- to play?
Cello?
- It-- it is hard to play.
But no, you catch
on after a while.
It becomes intuitive.
I'll have to show you
some pointers sometime.
- Really?
- Yeah!
Us musicians got
to stick together.
So what is this
going to be called?
Like, do you have a title?
- Yeah, I think so.
I was thinking I would call
it "I Have to Have You."
Just kidding.
That's not-- that's
not what it's called.
It's going to be called
"The Places You'll Go."
- Isn't that already
a Doctor Seuss book?
- Is it?
- Yeah.
- I don't know.
I'm still working on the name.
[screaming]
[heavy metal music playing]
- Look, there's like little
cat tails over there.
- Are they?
- Yeah, right there.
What's up, Pervo?
- Get out of the way.
I'm-- I'm filming the horizon?
- Yeah, you like these horizons?
- Oh my God.
- These are my bandmates,
Chris and Tony.
They rip.
Hey, you're going
to go swimming?
Jump in.
- Why don't you
jump in, freak show?
- Aren't we supposed
to be filming
a metal video or something?
- We are.
We-- we-- we will.
- OK, so then why are
you filming us instead?
- Why does anyone film anything.
I'm-- I'm documenting
the moment.
- Yo, Chris.
Beer me.
- Sure thing.
What are you doing?
Cut it out.
- Gotta quit being a skank.
Let him do his thing.
- Skank?
Jesus, Tawnia.
Who are these fucking tools?
I mean, who even
says skank anymore.
- I do when I'm making sweet,
sensual love to your mommy.
- You've been trying to fuck
my mom since the third grade.
- Shut up.
- You don't like this being
pointed at you, do you?
- No it's just it-- it's stupid.
I mean, what's the point of two
cameras staring at each other?
- Turn away, then.
I'm not stopping you.
I've got my subject
right where I want him.
I like watching you squirm.
- I hate fucking robot dancing.
[chatter]
- What did you ever
see in this twat?
Are you-- uh, is-- is
that your boyfriend now?
- Just Mike.
- But did you two go
to lunch together?
- Come on.
Dude, you're skeeving
everyone out.
- Are you going to
turn this thing off,
or are we going to
have to have words?
- Hey, Larry.
You know what?
It's-- it's-- it's fine, really.
- You asked me to come in today.
- And I'm-- I'm sure.
Hey, Caleb.
You're almost done
filming, right?
You're almost done?
- Is he your boyfriend
- Caleb?
- It's off.
It's off.
It's off.
What?
What the hell?
What the hell are
you all staring at?
This is just a normal morning.
Having breakfast
with my Nana here.
- Who are you talking to?
- The camera.
I'm talking to the camera.
- Why?
Where's Michael?
- Nana, he's dead.
- Then where's Larry?
- He's an asshole.
See?
Just a normal morning at Nana's.
- Who are you talking?
- I'm making a movie!
- You're talking to a movie.
- I'm talking to
my girlfriend, OK?
I'm talking to my girlfriend.
- Then I'm talking to Michael.
- OK, I'm Michael.
That's my good boy.
- OK, let me get you a reminder.
- Working hard or
hardly working?
- Gosh, Caleb, you scared me.
Why is your camera out again?
- I can't help it.
It was like, take
me to a pretty girl.
More pretty girl.
- Caleb, gross.
Stop it.
Seriously.
- Come on.
Can't you take a compliment?
Can you take a compliment?
- Do you want to get--
- It's getting harder and
harder to shoot at the office.
I guess it's time
for a new approach.
[music playing]
She stood amongst the
charred felled trees
The remains of a fruitful
wilderness now fruitless
She placed her
hand on my shoulder
As I downed upon one
knee, she christened me
In River Styx warrior
Mother, may I
Play with fire, fire
Mother may I
Played with death,
play with death
Mother, may I
Play with the bow
- We're at the
window of my house.
I looked out through my lattice.
And behold, a woman comes to
meet him dressed as a harlot
and cunning of heart.
[arguing]
- Fuck.
[chatter]
- Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Holy shit.
I've been working on
this, like, day and night.
Is anyone ever going
to see this even?
I guess you're
watching, aren't you?
I got some cool-ass fucking
gadgets in the mail today.
Yes.
Check this out.
Spy glass and night vision.
Oh, fuck.
Yeah.
OK.
Oh, fuck yes.
Nice.
OK.
Oh, fuck yeah Hey, Nana.
What are you doing today?
Oh, you're rollerblading?
Yeah, that's cool.
I wonder if I can get
prescriptions in here.
Fuck yeah!
- Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
[phone ringing]
- Oh!
Hey.
OK, yeah, yeah.
No, I'm-- I'm on my way out.
You realize how easy it is
to make a copy of a key?
You should keep a closer
eye on your purse.
[music playing]
- In the darkness,
I shall dwell well
until thou stir the bats of hell
from brimstone and mortar shell,
borne am I with
this tale to tell.
A maiden high up in
her tower, and I,
the beast of unknown power,
awaiting for that witching hour
to gnash and slash and claw.
[growls]
Fuck yeah!
- Did the power just go out?
- Yeah
- Shit, Nana, it reeks in here.
I guess I've been
shirking on my chores.
Nana, you need a bath, OK?
Get thyself clean, woman.
Hey, wake up.
Wake up.
It's breakfast time.
We got to do our bit.
Nana, come on.
[flies buzzing]
Nana.
Nana.
How was I supposed
to know she croaked?
I was at the container house.
I feel like I should say
some words or something.
Hardly knew her.
The lord is close
to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed.
- Nana?
How's it going today?
What is that smell?
You got mice again?
Mama?
Mama?
The heck?
Caleb!
Caleb, where the hell are you?
How did I let this--
Mom, I am so sorry.
What the heck?
Caleb?
Caleb?
Caleb!
Caleb!
[heavy metal music playing]
Dude.
Caleb, what the hell
were you thinking?
God damnit, Caleb,
where the hell were you?
Ah!
God damn it, you're as
worthless as your father.
Get out of my house!
(SINGING) Into your bed
You can't be greedy
- Fuck.
My keys!
(SINGING) Rats in the walls
- What?
- Where are you going?
- What do you mean?
What are you doing here?
- I thought you
were editing today.
- OK come on.
Get me-- get me out of here.
- What-- what happened to you?
- Just go.
Just get me out of here.
Go, go, go, go, go.
Come on!
How's the video looking?
- It's-- are you really
doing this again?
What can I say.
You guys look like a
bunch of sexist dipshits.
So, mission accomplished.
- Nice.
- So how's your creepshow going?
So you're like a total
incel, aren't you?
Come on, stop being revolting
for, like, one minute, OK?
- Come on.
You love it.
- You're going to get
what's coming to you.
You realize that, right?
- Absolutely.
[heavy metal music playing]
[karaoke music playing]
I lost control
My body's moving on its own
I watch myself walk away
A foreign spirit took my place
I'll
I'll disappear
I'll disappear
I'll disappear
[heavy metal music playing]
- (SINGING) In your basement
With all your toys
For girls and boys
Do they hurt
You work the streets
As the world sleeps
Hunting your brain
Will it hurt
Will it hurt
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Bite your scraps
Lest you're caught like a rat
One piece of cheese
Can't be so bad
Just one small thing
It can't hurt
Your poison spills
Across the land
The land
Does it hurt
Does it hurt
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Mind your traps
Lest you're caught like a rat
In the dark
Reap of night
He watches
Your every move
Take your time
For what's left
Oh, he does
What he does best
Rat catcher
Watch your step
Rat catcher
Mind your traps
Lest you're caught like a rat
[indistinct voices]
- I was reading this
article about frogging.
You ever heard of that?
It's like when you have a
hider in your house, someone
living in your attic or
literally in your walls.
I love to-- to just touch your
things, to dwell in your space
when you're not around.
It makes me-- it makes it feel
like it's our place, you know?
[playing the cello poorly]
- You're so dumb.
We should have gotten
tickets beforehand.
- I don't know how
to do that shit.
- Did I leave that
light on when we left?
- Um, one second.
It's off now.
- I just-- I never
leave the lights on.
Like, that's so strange
- Oh, I bet I did.
- You're on my hair
- Oh, sorry, sorry,
sorry, sorry, sorry.
- Here, I'll get on that.
It's just-- OK, the other
night when I was leaving here,
I heard, like, a big
noise up here, and I--
it was the weirdest thing.
Like, you know when you
feel like you're not alone?
- Yeah.
- There's condoms
in the nightstand.
- You sure they're in here?
- Well, there were definitely
condoms in there at some point,
and I guess he was like, so much
as like, packed that as, like,
taped it up and threw
it in the U-Haul.
- Now what?
- We don't have a condom.
- OK.
Pull out.
- Like, no.
- Come on.
I won't even cum.
Promise.
- Mike, stop.
Seriously.
- What?
What's wrong?
- I am not worried
about getting pregnant.
- Oh.
- I'm going to take that shower.
- Oh.
- You can still stay
over if you want to.
- I'll take you up on that.
Fuck.
[indistinct music playing]
- Hey, what are you
doing out there?
Moping?
- Yeah, kinda.
- Wash my back?
Keep me company?
- Babe?
- Hey, are you just
going to film us,
or are you going
to actually help?
- Yeah, I'll help in a minute.
- You're the one that
wants to go camping so bad.
- What do you call a drummer who
breaks up with his girlfriend?
- Homeless?
- Dude, don't ruin them!
- OK.
How do you know when a
drummer is at the front door?
- He doesn't know
when to come in.
- No, he says pizza's here.
- OK.
Tabby, this one's for you.
What's the difference
between groupie and a roadie?
- What is fuck off, Caleb?
- At least the roadie
gets paid after getting
fucked by the band!
- Oh, God.
- That's funny.
- You gotta do it.
You gotta do it.
[chatter]
- Uh-uh.
Mm-mm.
- Going to eat that stick?
- Yeah.
- Don't--
- Let me see that.
- That better not pass over.
- Come on.
- Better not pass--
- Give me the camera.
So, Caleb.
How did a Montana boy end
up in Nebraska, anyway?
- My dad grew up here.
- Yeah?
- Your dad was, like, a
total asshole, wasn't he?
- Yeah, I guess.
He was a cokehead and he, like,
ripped off a lot of people.
Paid child care.
Sent me a $100 bill on
my birthday every year.
- Aw.
So you like your daddy, Caleb?
- I don't know I never met him.
- Hey.
Up here, buddy.
- I can't help myself.
It's got a mind of its own.
- Haven't you seen
enough, horndog?
- Oh, pretty girl.
Oh, monster wants
to see more of you.
- All boys are
such peeping toms.
- Congratulations.
I decided to make a
movie about you now too.
- You will rue the day you ever
start that shit with me, Caleb.
- Oh, yeah?
I think maybe you want me
to start shooting you too.
- Yeah.
Yeah, that's it.
I'm just-- just really jealous.
- Hey, you want to come
to my tent with me?
- What, so we can
make a porno in there?
You really have, like, zero
radar for this shit, don't you?
- Well, then why don't
you just go to bed, then?
- Have you ever
heard of the phrase
men are afraid women
will laugh at them,
women are afraid
men will kill them?
- It's so cool.
- Yeah.
Yeah, that's you, dude.
- As you now know, I
had an ulterior motive
for this camping trip.
- What are you doing, freak?
Making your fucking movie?
- no, no.
- Get out of the car!
- No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
Hey, hey, no!
No, no, no!
- We knew it was you in
the woods that night,
you little piece of shit.
- Mike, stop it!
That's enough!
- What?
You think you pile of
shit deserves mercy?
- No, no, stop it!
Stop it, I said!
Get away from me.
Both of you get away from me.
- He's a pervert.
I'm only trying to protect you.
- I never asked
you to protect me.
Leave me alone!
[heavy metal music playing]
- For jealousy is
the rage of a man.
Therefore, he will not spare
in the day of vengeance.
[screaming]
- Please, I'm begging you.
Help me!
Please.
[distant screaming]
- How did you like my movie?
Lunchtime.
OK, come on.
Come on.
You gotta eat.
Krista you gotta eat.
Come on, it-- it's good.
Come on.
Mmm, mmm, it's good.
Come on.
Krista, you gotta eat.
Don't you have anything to say?
Not even a film re-- review?
Thumbs up?
Down?
How many stars?
Hey.
I am a nice guy, you know?
I made this movie for you.
For us.
I never wanted any
of this to happen.
I didn't plan on this.
But you know, it
started to dawn on me
that you were never going to
watch this thing unless, you
know, you were forced.
- Help, help!
- Quiet.
- Stop it!
Stop it!
- Shut up!
[screaming]
- Hey, you.
[barking]
Come here.
I didn't know we
had neighbors, bud.
Where's your owner?
Go home.
Go home.
Go, go, go.
[screaming intensifies]
- Hey, false alarm.
False alarm.
No worries, no worries.
There's no one for miles around.
You don't have to worry, though.
You're not going to be
here very long anyway.
- Are you going to kill me?
- God, no!
I am not going to kill you.
You're the star of my movie.
Quiet.
Just relax.
[heavy metal music playing]
- Sorry.
I'm, uh-- I'm late.
- Well, here it is.
If you're looking for
something turnkey,
this is the place with a
soundproof recording studio
that's Not even listed yet.
Here we go.
- Oh, this-- this interior
is incredibly solid.
- They don't build them
like they used to, do they?
- Spacious.
You could have a
whole setup in here.
Like, the bed over here and--
- Now you're seeing--
- --en suite bathroom over here.
- Now you're seeing
the big picture.
- A band could make a real
racket in here, you know?
- Yeah, and not a
soul would hear.
Well, except for the
lord above, that is.
- Amen to that.
[screaming]
- Hey, uh, Caleb.
Um, you haven't-- you haven't
seen Krista, have you?
- What?
Uh, um, no.
Why?
- Well, she's supposed to go
to my sister's baby shower
this morning, and
she didn't show up,
and she's not at her apartment,
and no one's heard from her.
- Oh, well-- well,
good luck with that.
- Uh, what are you up to?
- Groceries.
What does it look
like I'm up to?
- It's like you really-- you
really don't know where she is?
Because you-- you've been
stalking her, right I mean,
Mike caught you parked
outside of her apartment.
- You mean when
he did this to me?
That guy is a fucking monster.
Maybe you should ask
Mike where your pal is.
- Look, we know it was you
at Two Rivers last weekend.
- What?
Look.
Look, I-- I know things got
weird between Krista and me,
but--
but I've moved on.
Yeah, I've moved on.
You should too.
Don't worry about her.
Bye.
Krista?
Fuck!
Stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop!
Ah!
Fuck.
God damn it!
Fuck!
Fuck!
Where are you?
You bitch!
You fucking bitch!
Fuck!
[knocking]
- Shit, shit, shit.
[knocking]
- Hey, Caleb.
- Hold on.
Hold on.
I'll be right there.
- Caleb!
- Just-- just give me a second.
- Hey, you haven't been
responding to my texts.
What's going on?
- Um, I need a ride into town.
Can you give me a ride?
- Um, yeah, sure.
But what's up with
the itty bitty knife?
Are you OK? 'Cause you're
acting really weird.
- Uh-huh.
- OK, well, there was this
guy that came by my apartment
today asking me if I
knew anything about you
and some chick named Krista?
That's your girlfriend
or whatever--
- Wait, what?
- Yeah.
- No.
Um, who was he?
- Hey, Caleb!
Caleb, you're like,
completely unhinged.
What is going on?
Are you in trouble?
What, do you think
I'm recording you?
That's your perv shit, dude.
- OK, I really need your car.
I need your car right now.
- How did you get here?
Where's your car?
How did you get up--
- Give me your fucking keys!
- Caleb--
- What are you doing?
Cut it out.
- You gotta quit being a skank.
Let him do his thing.
- Skank?
Gang, Tawnia.
Who are these fucking tools?
I mean, who even
says skank anymore?
- I do when I'm making sweet,
sensual love to your mommy.
- You've been trying to fuck
my moms since the third grade.
Shut up.
- You don't like this being
pointed at you, do you?
- No, it's just--
it's stupid.
I mean, what's the point of two
cameras staring at each other?
- Well, turn away, then.
I'm not stopping you.
I've got my subject
right where I want him.
I like watching you squirm.
So Tony says that you're
making a movie for some mystery
girlfriend of yours?
- Yeah, I'm--
I'm documenting our courtship.
- Your courtship?
OK, Grandpa.
So, what's it about?
You're just making a
porno, aren't you, Caleb?
- Tawnia--
- --Tawnia.
- What?
No I-- she's-- we're--
we're not really dating yet.
- Oh!
- So what, you're
just stalking her?
Cool.
- No, it's not a documentary.
It's a horror.
It's about this guy
who's trying to make
this really beautiful film.
Then this skank he hardly
knows shows up and ruins it.
- Dude, I'd see that.
- Oh, so that's--
that's not a horror.
Something horrific
has to happen.
Like, the dude's nuts get
chopped off or something.
So what happens?
Does the girl get
her nuts chopped off?
- I guess you'll
have to wait and see.
[music playing]
(SINGING) The sky
lights up once again
Like some morning is for
- I could tell there was
something off about you
since that first day we met.
Tony's friends are
usually skeeves, but you?
You were different.
Skeevier, if that's a word.
You were too cocky about the
so-called doc you were making,
and you were hiding
something, but you
wanted us to know you
were hiding something.
Hubris is a salty
sardine, my friend.
- I thought you said
he was moving to Peru.
- Yeah, what of that?
- Well, why would he give a
crap if anything's out of place?
- OK, OK.
Cool your jets.
Don't get in a tizzy.
- What the hell?
What-- I didn't say
you could shoot me.
- Hey, hey.
Is this one of those tizzies?
- This is my movie, not yours.
Turn that shit off?
- Hey, man.
Relax.
She's not doing anything wrong.
- And if you must know, I'm
making a documentary for my film
class.
Michael Moore is supposed
to be coming and giving
a guest lecture, and he's
going to critique our movies.
- Did you say you're
making it about me?
- No, I'd like to
actually get a good grade.
- With this, I see everything.
I am like God and
the fucking devil.
- Um, You're delusional,
is what you are.
Hey, Caleb.
I've got a camera.
What's that make me?
I've been looking for something
more provocative to work on,
you know, other than
that usual film school
dreck like how my grandparents
met or, hey, look.
My cat's in heat.
So I decided, what the heck?
I'll follow this
dweeb around and see
what's really going on behind
this girlfriend documentary
bullshit.
- Fuck!
- Oh, what the fuck?
- Fuck.
- Well, clearly, I
had no fucking clue
what I was getting myself into.
So I figured that I would
share a little bit about myself
since we still don't really
know each other too well.
And that's what you did
in your little movie.
So-- but then it occurred to me
that you freaking disgust me.
I have zero interest
in you liking me
and zero plans on kidnapping
you and turning you
into my Hollywood
Barbie plaything
or whatever your
fucked up plan was.
OK, I guess technically, that
last part isn't entirely true.
Roll the tape.
I like movies and making movies.
I still live with my mom and her
weird, good-looking boyfriend,
which frickin' blows.
But I can't afford my
own apartment 'Cause--
- Mom, you're
supposed to ignore it.
- --I'm taking classes
pretty much full time.
And yes, one of them's
my documentary class.
And most importantly--
- Depraved!
Depraved!
Filthy, disgusting boy!
- I mean, seriously.
Were you trying to blame
your dead mom on all
that fucked up shit you pulled?
That's on you, Caleb.
You're the piece of shit.
(SINGING) Not used to this inn
20s and teens
Grabbing on the handrail
for everyone to see
Do you catch
yourself smiling now
When you find that
you do love whatever
Everything whenever you say so
Love used to inn
20s and teens
Grab it on the handrail
for everyone to see
Do you catch
yourself smiling now
When you find that
you love whatever
Everything whenever you say so
Hold your little hands up
Hold up, hold hands up
To your mouth, you will be far
To lay you down
Hey you lay down
- I really wish I
could unsee this.
(SINGING) Gonna lay down
Lay down
Hey, you're gonna lay down
You lay down
Hey, you gonna lay down
- And yeah, that was me.
[yelling]
- Just give it to
me on the inside.
Stalking a stalker is
weird and sometimes scary.
Shit, I think he sees me Hey!
What are you--
- What?
- What are you doing?
Where are you going?
- What are you-- what
are you doing here?
- I thought we
were editing today.
- My nerves are shot.
I gotta take a dump.
- Real nice, Caleb.
[toilet flushing]
- Don't worry.
False alarm.
- Oh thank God.
- How's the video looking?
- It's-- are you really
doing this again?
What can I say?
You guys look like a
bunch of sexist dipshits.
So, mission accomplished.
- Nice.
- So how's your creepshow going?
- Fuck you.
- What's the difference between
a bass player and a savings
bond?
One will eventually
mature and make money.
OK, what do you call someone
who hangs out with musicians?
- I don't know.
Maybe we should ask the chicks.
What do you prefer
to be called--
groupies or sluts?
- A bass player, dipshit.
Recognize a pattern?
- Sluts.
- Oh, OK.
What do you call a beautiful
woman on a bass player's arm?
A tattoo, bitch!
- I love, love
catching these moments
you choose not to include
in your little pervo piece.
- What the fuck?
- Guys.
- Kill it.
- It was a joke.
It was a joke.
- Give me the fucking book, man!
- I was starting to feel like
my little Doc was petering out.
I thought I'd try to put an
end to it once and for all.
Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
- Caleb!
What the fuck?
What did you do?
- Nothing.
It's just-- there's
just friends from work,
and I was going to
surprise them, but--
- Wait, is that why you
insisted on this spot.
- Please, if they come
here, you don't know me.
- The incident in the
woods made me realize
this shit was just heating up.
Something seriously
fucked up is happening.
Caleb is definitely going
to the container house,
and he's definitely not
supposed to be there anymore.
I felt terrible leaving
Krista tied up like this.
I tried calling the cops, but of
course, my freaking phone died.
I needed to plot my
next moves carefully.
Hey!
Hey, Doc!
Go away!
- Why are you--
Stop it!
Stop it!
- Shut up!
[screaming]
- Krista!
Krista, My name is Tawnia.
It's going to be OK.
I'm going to get you out.
All right, there
has to be a key.
There must-- Yes!
OK, can I just--
[sobbing]
- It's OK.
[sobbing]
- It's OK, it's OK.
[heavy metal music playing]
- Yep, this is your
surveillance camera I set up.
How's it feel, fucko?
- Fuck!
(SINGING) You stabbed
me in the chest
Over again, you
expect me to clean up
- Hey, stop, stop,
stop, stop, stop, stop!
Fuck!
Fuck!
[yelling]
You bitch!
Fucking bitch!
[screaming]
- Jesus H, pull
yourself together, dude.
(SINGING) The sky
lights up once again
Like sun rays more than it's for
You know there
- Ah!
You bitch!
(SINGING) You saw me
It's that time once again
- Shit, shit, shit, shit.
Hold on.
Hold on.
I'll be right there.
Give me a second.
- You haven't been
responding to my texts.
What's going on?
- Um, um, I need
a ride into town.
Can you give me a ride?
- What's up with the
itty bitty knife?
OK, well, there was this guy
that came by my apartment
today asking me if I
knew anything about you
and some chick named Krista.
- Who was he?
- Hey, Caleb.
Caleb, you're, like,
completely unhinged.
What is going on?
Are you in trouble?
What, do you think
I'm recording?
- Car right now.
I need your car, please.
- Where are your keys.
How did you get up here?
- Give me your fucking keys!
- Caleb!
- What the fuck?
Fuck!
- Ah!
- You fucking bitch.
Let me out!
- Fuck you!
Fuck you!
Why?
You can't do this!
You can't do this!
No.
Somebody help me!
Somebody help me.
Krista!
Krista!
- You always said--
Whoever slays Cain, vengeance
will be taken sevenfold!
- Just shut up with
your scripture bullshit.
- Tawnia, please.
Come on, please.
What did I ever do to you?
- I knew that you
were up to no good.
I could just fucking tell.
But-- but you are
one depraved fuck.
- What is that?
What is that for?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You can't do this.
- Obviously, it's
a work in progress.
- Don't.
Come on, come on, come on.
Please I-- I like you.
I really do.
I like you.
- You like me?
- Yeah.
- You too?
- Please help me.
- These ought to help.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
- One for the money.
- No.
- Two for the show.
- No!
No.
- Three to get ready.
- No, no, no.
- Go!
[screaming]
- You're pathetic.
- Fuck you.
- Depraved!
Depraved!
- Krista, please, please.
Please, I love you.
- Filthy, disgusting boy.
Was your penis swollen?
Were you touching yourself?
- Mama, please.
I'll be good.
I'll be good.
- Do you know what happens
to filthy, disgusting boys
like you, Caleb?
- No, no.
- They rot.
That's what happens.
They rot and they rot until
their insides are just
puss and bile.
You disgust me, Caleb.
- No, no.
I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
Please, please.
I'll be a good boy.
I'll be good.
I'll be good, please.
I'll be good.
Please.
- How do you like
that fucking movie?
[music playing]
(SINGING) Curled up in a den
Who's left you for dead
A spot of blood on your wool
Wounded animal
Who got hold of you
Who knocked your thoughts loose
Always baring your teeth
Wounded animal.
Limping to your grave
Longing to be saved
You know I would if I could
Wounded animal
Wait a second, I'm a little off
Wait a minute, I'm a little lost
Would you reboot me, please