WTF! (2017) Movie Script

What the fuck?!
Oh, fuck...
Die, motherfucker! Die!
You have to be brave.
I am being brave.
I know you are.
Your mom would be
so proud of you.
I wanna go see.
I wanna go see him.
I don't know if that's...
I need to go see him.
Jesus Christ.
Heh. Yep.
Pretty much sums it up.
I'll tell you this much.
I've always considered myself
to be a pragmatic man...
But this?
You think she's jinxed?
I don't know.
What do you think? I...
I mean, going through
what she's gone through...
I just..
What does that do to a person?
Spring-fucking-break, pussies!
- Hey, how you doin'?
- How you doin'?
Oh, do you want...
- Yeah, I do, actually.
That's nice. That's good.
I rolled it!
Jacob, by the way. Hey.
One... two... three!
Hey, Bonnie!
Hi, Donnie. Oh!
You look
fan-fucking-tastic tonight!
You are so sweet.
And thanks so much
for throwing this party.
No, you know what would
be really sweet?
Tell me.
I want to lose
my straight-fucking-v card
to you tonight!
Like right now!
Okay, so I don't think
we should do that tonight.
No, no, like,
let's do it right now.
Okay, I think you're
a little drunk, babe,
and also gay.
I'm ready for this...
Oh, my God,
Bonnie, you smell so good!
What the fuck?
What's with him?
Tell me you finally dumped him.
I don't even know.
Sam is wasted.
I anticipated you wanted this.
Yeah, but not
with this much ice.
God, he probably
rufied this shit, anyway.
Any who, you should
seriously dump him.
Do you want me
to do this for you?
I don't know...
- Okay.
- No, no.
Okay, listen, Rachel.
The second you let men
have control,
Your relationship is over.
You just need
to stick up for yourself
and you'll be fine.
Let's go shopping tomorrow.
Hi, I'm broke.
Hello, I'm not.
Are you fucking serious?!
Oh, my God.
Lisa, I am so sorry.
Here. Let me get that for you.
- Yeah, okay. It's fine.
So good to see you.
I'm gonna miss times like these
when we graduate.
Oh, my God.
I know.
I can't believe
we're about to graduate.
It's, like,
almost time for Botox.
I know.
Those bags of yours, they're
really starting to set in.
Go to hell, Lisa.
Only two more months
'til graduation!
Who else is excited?
- Oh, my God. Don't remind me.
My dad's been pestering me
to find a job.
Financial independence.
Shit like that.
Mine too,
but then I reminded him
about the time I caught him
face-fucking my babysitter,
so, yep, no work for me.
But seriously, girls,
this is our last
spring break together.
We should definitely
do something fun,
Like maybe a girls' spa day
or something.
Or we could go to Maui.
We could stay
at the Four Seasons.
Hmm, Cancun?
Cabo's nicer.
More like Ca-boring.
Yeah, I guess you're right.
Why don't we talk to the guys?
I'm sure that they'll have
some good ideas
Which might not
put me into debt.
Okay, Rachel, come on.
The guys?
Seriously? Is she still
having separation anxiety
from that thing
that she follows everywhere?
Sure, he can be a jerk,
but he has his moments.
- Right.
- Okay, Rachel.
Well, anyway, since you spilled
most of my drink,
I need a refill.
I guess I'll come.
Come on, let's go.
Can somebody clean this?
Rachel who?
It's spring break, brohemians.
Can't fucking wait.
So are you and Rachel Who
doing something special
for spring break?
I dunno...
Maybe anal?
Gross, dude.
Dude, that's fucked up.
You guys still
haven't done anal?
That's Jesus' favorite hole,
by the way.
She's fuckin' weird
about that shit.
You know what you should do?
You should just, just, just
slip it in gently, you know,
While you guys
are fucking normally.
She'll never be able to tell.
I swear.
Even if that made sense,
it's a moot point,
'cause Sam doesn't fuck her,
at all.
Fuck you!
I do just fine.
What's that supposed to mean?
Like jacking off.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Oh.
You guys want some?
Oh, my God, Bonnie,
I wanna be transgendered
and look like you!
Hell, yeah, it is!
Bonnie, I
wanna date you sexually!
- Bonnie!
- Dah, Bonnie!
You know you would not
say a word to that girl
If you weren't drunk!
But I am, and I did,
and I'm probably
gonna do it again
after I get blackout drunk!
You're not gonna say a thing.
You have the smallest balls
in the world!
Hey, look at that guy!
That is inaccurate!
It is inaccurate!
As small as those are, your
balls are smaller than that!
Hi, guys.
Hey, Bonnie.
So, you guys got in
without me, huh?
You can sit-you can
sit next to me, Bonnie.
Nice, nice.
- Rufies and tonic?
- Yes, please.
Getting in, Rach?
- I'm waiting for Sam.
Ugh, lame.
What are you doing here?
You know, I'm just here alone.
You didn't come with anyone?
Rachel, keep your eye on him.
He's literally disgusting.
He's not that bad.
He's a flirt.
I can be a flirt, too.
- Who's a flirt?
- You, bad boy.
You are, babe.
Do you have any mints?
Is that a joke?
Dude. Motherfucker, dude.
What? Oh, the hair.
Okay, Sam.
If you can stop obsessing
over your hair
for a sec,
I wanna talk to you guys
about going somewhere
for spring break.
I'm in, as long as
it's on the cheap.
My parents aren't in
overwhelming generosity mode
after hearing about my grades
Last semester.
It must suck to be poor
and stupid, doesn't it?
I got it!
Two words.
The... woods.
That's barely tho words.
However many words,
it's a shitty idea.
Camping sucks.
- Yes, it does.
It's not camping.
It's paradise, But in the woods.
Wow, you've officially graduated
from pot to crack.
No, I'm being serious!
Just picture it, right?
It's s secluded cabin,
way far in the woods.
Nearest neighbor
is like a mile away.
Best part about it,
it's got no working
smoke alarms!
- What?
- Doesn't sound very fun.
So, relaxing in Hawaii,
or a creepy old cabin
in Bumblefuck?
It's not creepy, though!
My uncle just refurbished it
right before he died.
God rest his soul.
Glorified camping
equals glorified suck.
Bevan, it's not camping, man!
Camping wishes it was this.
Does it have Wi-fi at least?
And, full disclosure,
It has no cellphone service,
But it has electricity!
It has electricity!
Meet me half way!
Meet me half way!
You okay, Rach?
You do not have to go
if you don't want to.
Aw, Wachel's scawed.
Cweepy cabin in the woods,
all by ouwselves!
It's not creepy!
I keep tellin' you!
It's not creepy!
And if...
If anything creepy
does happen...
I got you.
I'm serious, man!
I must have water in my ears,
because I did not
just hear that.
Well, I've gotta get going
to study for my history test.
Only two more weeks.
See you guys later.
- Bye.
- Bye, Rach.
- Damn, killing the vibe.
- See you, Rach.
Bye, Rachel.
Just to be clear.
Is she in?
Yes, she's in.
She just has some shit
she needs to deal with.
Bonnie, you
can't just say that...
Bonnie, why don't you tell us?
I'd really like to know.
Go on.
Okay, well, I really shouldn't
be saying anything right now,
but she told me,
a few years back,
some crazy guy killed
a bunch of her friends,
and she's the only one
who survived.
- What?!
- I haven't been able
to get her to say
anything about it since.
Wow. That's totally fucked up.
Are you serious?
Swear to God.
My God.
I mean, like,
we've known Rachel for years,
but none of us knew any of this.
Maybe the cabin...
is not such a good idea.
No, no, no.
I'll talk to her.
Okay, no.
I will talk to her drunk ass.
Since the dawn of time,
for better or for worse,
usually for worse,
history is characterized by
a tendency to repeat itself.
Civilizations causing
their own demise,
genocide, violence.
All are catastrophic effects
of this global phenomenon.
Rachel, hey, hey, hey.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Come here.
Come here, come here,
come here, come here.
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
It's okay.
I'm here.
You okay?
Aside from the ultra-meltdown
I just had...
Yeah, totally. I'm good.
It's happening again, isn't it?
I just...
I had a bad moment in class.
I feel much better.
Just need to take
a deep breath, or possibly two.
Is this about the trip
you're going on?
Spring blowout in the woods?
Who told you?
I have my sources.
Bonnie's been blasting it
all over social media,
hasn't she?
- Mm-hmm.
I need to conquer my fear.
I think that this will be
a good first step.
Are you sure?
It's been three years...
I'm 99 percent sure.
What about the ultra-meltdown?
That was more of
a mini ultra-meltdown.
Tell you what...
At the risk of running
a serious social faux pas
by inviting myself...
Are you saying you want
to escort me on my trip
in case I have
a spring breakdown?
Well that...
and to get piss drunk
in the woods.
So, who's ready
for spring break?!
Let's do it!
Someone's in better spirits.
Smells like you've been
into some spirits.
I'll be driving.
I really hope Rachel is okay.
It'd suck so hard
if she had, like, PTSD,
or something like that.
Do you think we can
get, like, a Wi-fi hotspot
for my phone?
Hey, girl.
Hey, Jacob, have
you got those bags?
I got 'em.
All right.
We're good to go, huh?
- Are we there yet?
- We are not there.
- Don't touch her!
- Bye!
- I've got the pot buzz.
- Don't touch her!
- I got my bong...
- Stop talking, Sam.
I got my vaporizer...
I got edibles...
You guys bring any pot?
- Spring break, bitches!
- Spring break, bitches...
- Stop talking, Sam!
We know this isn't
easy Rachel, but right now
you're the only one who could
help us put the pieces together.
Rachel, we need to establish
a timeline for that night.
We need to know
everything that happened,
when it happened,
and how it happened,
once you and your friends
went on your trip.
I beg your pardon?
We drove into
the middle of nowhere,
and that's where it all started.
Oh my God, I can't believe
you just closed the door on me!
Maybe we should
just keep driving.
Shut up.
Hi, ladies.
Seriously? You too?
Wow. That's impressive work.
You should see what I can do
with a dollar.
Drop a 20, and things
could get really interesting.
Here we go.
For you.
It's party time!
I know, seriously.
Here we go.
Ugh! I'm really hungry!
You think
they have Sno Balls there?
Are you guys already high?
What?! Are you serious?
On their shit?!
My 13-year-old brother
has higher quality herb.
You know, what?
Your mouth says my weed sucks,
but your eyes, they're saying
something different.
What do they say?
You guys are paying, right?
This place gives me the creeps.
I gotta piss like a race horse.
Don't worry about me, Sam.
I'll be fine.
What a dickhead.
Have I mentioned lately
that you need to dump him?
Seldom do I say this, but...
Bonnie's right.
This place has, like, nothing.
Hey, hillbilly man...
You take credit card. Right?
You folks gotta be
a long way from home,
thinking I would take
a credit card in this place.
Well, do you take cash?
Guys, whatever you'd like,
it's on me.
Hey, it's like
it's your birthday.
Hey excuse me, sir.
So, we're heading out
to my late uncle's place.
It's at the end
of Linden street,
like, in the thick
of the woods out there.
You got any short cuts
or anything that'll
get us out there quicker?
I lost three good dogs there.
I never even went back
to look for 'em.
Well, I feel, like,
eight pounds lighter.
All right, well,
this should cover everything,
and you can keep the change...
'cause, uh,
I don't wanna touch anything
that's touched your hands.
You folks ought to take heed.
I wouldn't go there
if I were you.
Young, pretty people
like yourselves.
Yeah, muchos gracias
for the directions, bro.
Goddamn dumb chick
forgot her credit card.
Look at him back there. How the
hell do you deal with that?
You don't know him like I do.
He's actually a really
sweet guy behind closed doors.
Okay well, if you're not
gonna dump him,
then maybe you should
turn the tables on him.
Shut him out completely,
and use him for the one thing
he might actually be good for.
Lifting things up
and putting them down?
I assume you're talking
about sex...
Who said anything about sex?
I need to get outta here.
You and me both.
Uh, I'm occupied, obviously.
I could shotgun it
into your mouth if you want.
You do that and I'll put you
in a chokehold.
I know jiu-jitsu, bitch.
Look at this place!
Come on babe,
let's check out the bedrooms.
Uh, why don't we let the guys
get our luggage,
so we can freshen up?
That sounds like
a great idea, Bonnie.
Your pores could certainly
use a once-over!
Wait. How do we get in?
What do you think the chances
are of Bonnie fucking me?
Normally, I'd say no,
But you did somehow get that
chick at the motel to fuck you.
You act like you're surprised.
If anything's surprising,
it's that you got laid
at that motel.
Why is that surprising?
I'm just saying, I've never seen
you with a chick before.
Honestly, I was beginning
to think hat you were gay.
What are you guys talking about?
I've been with tons of chicks!
Your four fingers and your
thumb don't count as a chicks.
Sorry, Bev.
I'm the one in the group
that gets the chicks!
This is fucking bullshit!
Naw, he's definitely gay.
I fucked your mom.
No, you didn't.
Wait, no, you didn't!
Ooh, wait for me.
I think a nice buzz could
even out my high pretty good.
All right, ladies, the name
of the game is chugging.
Are. You in?
- Yes.
- Yes.
Okay, one, two, three!
Ooh, wow.
All this bromance in the air
really makes me wish
I was a lesbian.
Lookin' good, girls!
Damn, never mind. I was way
too stoned for that game...
But I'm not too stoned
for some lovin'.
Hey, you wanna make out?
Okay. What are you thinking?
Here or the bedroom?
Wait. For real?
Oh, shit.
Okay. Here.
Here. Okay.
In your stoneriffic dreams!
I was close. I was close.
I was close. I was close!
That was never gonna happen.
This is.
Rachel! Really?!
- Come on, Rachel.
Come on, babe.
That'd be so hot.
Come on, Rach, stop being
such a fucking square!
- Good one, Bev.
- This is not happening.
That might not be happening,
but... this is.
- Oh, shit.
- Hey, can I join?
This is the best
spring break ever.
Um, no.
Down, dog.
I'm right here, Sam.
Don't be so fuckin' uptight.
I wasn't gonna actually do it.
We can leave right now.
Just say the word.
No, I'm staying.
Well, in that case,
grab us some beers.
If my dick wasn't so stoned,
I'd totally fuck you silly.
Right, 'cause that's
the only reason
that's not happening.
- I'd like to make a toast.
- Ugh!
Oh, my God, so boring!
Let's just get shitoxicated!
- Seriously.
- Aren't you already drunk?
Aren't you supposed to
toast with champaign?
Hey, everyone! Focus.
I just wanted to say...
thank you guys so much for
being so awesome on this trip.
I know I've been
a bit weird lately,
But I appreciate you all
bearing with me.
Show us your tits...
And, of course,
thank you, to my mature...
All right, guys!
What's with everybody
always getting my shirt wet?!
For the real chug toast.
Damn it.
So, what do you guys think?
My uncle's place
is pretty tight, right?
Yo, I thought
your uncle was dead.
Who's keeping these fish alive?
My uncle didn't
die that long ago.
Plus, he's got all types
of automatic feeders hooked up
to keep these fellas kickin'.
Fish feeders
don't last that long.
Your uncle must have died
pretty recently.
Dude, are you, like,
still in mourning?
I hope those fishies don't mind
if I whip this bad boy out!
- What?!
- Oh, shit!
Oh, dude!
It's a bongasaurus!
Whoa! It's Bongzilla.
How'd I not see it
sitting right there?
Because you're a Stoner.
Yes, I am.
- He's got you there.
- I am.
Do you wanna do the honors?
Don't mind if I do.
Thank you, sir.
- Yeah.
Oh, God.
Oh, my God, that's gorgeous.
- Oh, yeah.
Thank you.
Oh, shit.
Yo, blow some of that shit
my way.
I'm better with the tech stuff
when blazed.
Ooh, yeah.
Can you feel that?
- Yeah.
Yeah, this shit is dope.
What are you doing
over there anyways,
Nerd-o-Rama 5000?
I'm settin' up a video game.
You've got my attention.
So, this system actually
just plays classic video games.
- Lame.
- Double lame.
Yeah, I figured you guys
would say something like that,
and I totally understand.
Something vintage like this
requires a certain level
of sophistication
that I would not expect
from either of you two.
Oh, I get what you're doing.
I get what he's doing.
I get what you're doing.
You're trying to make
your lame game seem less shitty
by calling us unsophisticated.
Is that what I'm doing?
and I don't appreciate it, man.
Video cord must be in the car.
I'll be back!
- Oh, no, the video cord's in the car!
Don't fuck with
the set while I'm gone!
Don't fuck with
the set while I'm gone!
Wait, how does that make us
more unsophisticated
if we like more cooler, better,
newer, less shitty games?
Yo, fuck Bevan, dude.
Let's fuck with this shit.
Yeah, let's fuck with his shit.
Fuck Bevan. Fuck Bevan!
And I'm the gay one.
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck, dude!
Where have you ladies been?
Lady stuff.
Come here.
Ew. Perv.
Check it. I'll give you
a better view, too.
There's nothing to see.
Yes! I will fucking end you!
I will end you!
You're such a loser.
Come closer and
say that to my twat.
Hey, Bonnie, you motorboat me,
I'll motorboat you?
You okay?
- Hey, what's up, babe?
- What's goin' on?
You guys need
some help over there?
I-I'll be okay.
I'm just a little dizzy.
Okay, good, 'cause I'm
crushin' it right now,
and I don't want
to fuck up my flow.
She'll be fine.
This isn't the first time
I've made a girl dizzy
at the sight of my body.
Please. If I had to choose
between seeing that
or doing what she just did,
I'd definitely do
what she just did.
I certainly understand.
Must be hard for you to look
without touching.
All right, babe, let's
leave the boys to it.
You look like
you could use some rest.
Thank you.
Hey you're coming back after
you put her to bed, right?
If by put her to bed,
you mean puttin' those balls
into dat ass!
That's not a thing.
Jacob, that's not actually
a thing.
Told ya.
Such a child.
I think I'm gonna
take a little nap.
Bonnie, you wanna come...
hit the sack?
Kinda like how Rachel's hitting
Sam's nutsack, right now?
Yes, yes,
now I am certainly ready.
Excuse me.
- What? I'm on fire!
I'm on fire.
I think you're making
some headway with Bonnie.
I think soon I'll be getting
some head from Bonnie.
I heard that!
You were meant to!
I got this in the bag.
I thought that... you were
just putting me to sleep.
I will when I'm finished.
Ugh, stop!
- What?
- I'm sorry, I can't!
Rachel, are you serious
right now?
I-I'm sorry.
Rachel, fuck! Come on!
My-my balls are like
fuckin' Smurfs right now!
This is fuckin' bullshit, man!
Okay, so, your friends are a
bunch of perverted degenerates,
is that it?
You've painted
a pretty vivid picture here.
I get it. We get it.
Fast forward a
little bit for us, Rachel.
When did things
start to go wrong?
Yes, and be as precise
and as detailed as possible.
We need to put together
an intimate understanding
of how all of this went down.
The only way we could help you
is you offer us as much
information as possible.
Yo, yo!
Got a special delivery!
Are you seriously telling me
that none of
you able-bodied men
are gonna help Rach out
with this?
There is nothing able-bodied
about me right now.
I'm pretty thoroughly fucked up.
You guys are useless.
And you, you're her boyfriend,
you're just gonna
let her do this?
Nobody told her to do it.
I don't mind swimming
with a few leaves.
Why don't you help
if you care so much?
Chivalry is so fucking dead.
I'm good.
Hey, why did your uncle
even live out here?
It's so boring.
And there are
mosquitoes everywhere.
This may sound clich,
but he really loved
the great outdoors.
His house is practically
a mansion.
Hey, how did he die?
Like, what happened?
Nah, they actually
never found him.
What? Like he just,
like, disappeared?
Yeah, something like that.
I don't know.
My theory is that...
he's still out here,
lost in the woods,
along with his mind...
and a machete.
I'm going for a swim.
Anyone else?
Spring break, bitches!
Come on, boys.
- Get off my Kool Aid,
before I sick Uncle Travis
on you.
So tiny!
Come on, babe!
Live a little!
I don't know.
Don't you wanna make this
a spring break to remember?
All right, children,
no photos or videos,
or I will end all of you!
I have no interest.
Yeah, this is weird.
I agree.
We're gonna pass!
- Oh, my God.
- Aw, boo!
- Come on!
- No!
I showed you mine!
Come on!
- Debbie Downer!
- Seriously!
- Oh, no!
- Bonnie, no!
I'm gonna check on her!
Bonnie, come on!
It's just you and me, boys.
Bonnie, I got this.
I promise, okay?
I'm gonna count to three, okay?
All right.
One, two, three.
Someone give me
a fucking painkiller!
I got you, babe.
How did this happen?
What do you think happened,
Somebody put this there
to hurt me! Fuck!
You guys, should I seriously
go to the hospital right now?
Okay, the doctor
will see you now.
Obviously I need something
stronger than alcohol, Sam!
The fuck...
It's a nail, Bonnie. I'm sure it was
just laying around or something.
I didn't see it there
when I went there earlier.
You guys,
should I literally go get,
like, a technical shot
or something?
Okay, really? Nothing?
Good friends, guys.
Fucking assholes.
- Technical shot?
Yeah, I don't know.
Anyone need a beer?
I'm good.
Okay, guys. I
think I need some rest.
Sam, you comin'?
I'm not going anywhere.
Full house, baby!
He's such a sweetie.
I can see why you're with him.
I'm out of here.
There she goes,
killin' the vibe again.
Every fucking time, dude.
You are so disgusting, Sam.
You are like
the centipedes here.
Yeah, but unlike the centipedes,
I'm not gonna crawl into your
mouth when you're sleeping...
Unless you want me to.
That is so gross, you cockroach!
Okay, I need...
a shower every time
I hear your slimy voice.
Well, at least
you'll be really clean!
Need any company
for those showers?
Um, no!
God, why are my friends
such perverts?!
Who's there?
Late Uncle Travis?
- Die motherfucker!
- Aah!
Oh, Jesus, Sam!
You scared the shit
outta me, man!
Why do you have that
stupid fucking skeleton mask
anyway, man?!
Chill, mi amigo.
I've come for another cerveza.
What are you doin'
in here alone, anyways, bro?
You gettin' jerked off by
the ghost of your dead uncle?
Shut up!
Excuse me.
I'm commandeering Bongzilla.
What? No!
Come here!
Hi. I'm going to
rip your skull out!
Not if I slice you in half
with me my ultra razor,
It's kinda cold here.
Ready to lose your skull?
Are you ready to see me in hell?
Sam, do you think
you could help me
with getting some firewood
from the storage closet?
I think it'll definitely
make this place warmer.
Uh, yeah.
I'll be right there.
Don't let that girl
get to you, Sammy.
She's Exorcist evil!
If you'll excuse me.
- Whoa.
- It's kinda creepy down here.
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
Let there be light.
I guess there's no firewood
after all, huh?
You're so fucking hot.
What the fuck am I doing?
Is someone there?!
Bevan, if that's you,
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
Come on!
Come on!
Die, motherfucker! Die!
Did you-did you hear that?
It sounds like someone else
is gettin' some.
Go, Bev.
Wait, wait, did you hear that?
- No!
- It sounded like it was Bonnie!
Dude! Dude!
We need to go help her!
- Just let me finish.
- No, really!
- Just let me finish!
- It's Bonnie!
We need to help her!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
- What's wrong?!
He's dead.
He's fucking dead!
- Who?!
- Jacob's uncle Travis?
Bevan. Bevan is dead.
Bevan is dead.
- What the fuck are you...
- Aah!
- Bevan is fucking dead.
- What are you talking about?
No, no. We need to
get the fuck out of here.
Are you-are you sure?!
Are you sure he's dead?!
- Wait here!
- Did you check his pulse?
We need to leave
right now, Lisa.
W-we need to call the police.
Poor Bevan.
All he wanted to do was fuck me!
I should've just
let him fuck me.
I can't believe he's dead, Lisa.
Fucking call the police!
Has your phone worked
since we've been here?!
Mine hasn't!
Yeah, exactly!
I didn't think so!
Now, are you fucking sure
that he's dead?!
Oh, my God.
Bevan! Rachel!
I heard a scream,
and I ran in here,
And there's-
there's just blood everywhere!
Come on, come on, come, on.
Let's go.
This is fucked up.
Dude, what the fuck?
What the hell is going on?
I don't know, man.
I think Bevin's playing, like,
some sort of fucked up trick!
That's really fucked up, man.
He wouldn't do that!
It's way too fucked up!
Bonnie came out of the shower
and said that
she saw Bevan dead.
Did you see Bevan?
Bev man's dead?
Now would be a good time for
you to show yourself, Bevan!
We heard you
from the storage room!
Who were-who were you with
in the storage room?
We were just...
We were getting firewood
From the storage room.
Lisa and I.
Didn't you say
the firewood was outside?
Wait, I told everyone
the firewood was outside.
You fuckin' liar.
Whatever, man!
That's not important right now!
We need to figure out
what the hell is going on!
How are we supposed
to trust you?
You can't even
get your story straight!
What were you doing in there?
Fuck! As always, you're stoned
and paranoid,
and you can accuse me later,
but not now!
- What if I accuse you right now, then, huh?
- What the fuck?
What, are you gonna slice
and dice us like you did Bevan?
- Relax!
- Stop it!
- What the fuck's going on?
- Stop it!
What's going on?
What's wrong with you, man?!
Where were you?!
I just fucking told you!
I was in the storage closet!
What the fuck
were you and Lisa doing
in my dead uncle's
storage closet?!
We were fucking!
All right?!
All right?!
Look, babe.
I'm sorry, but, like...
You... go to hell.
You better back the fuck off.
- Thanks.
- Dude, that's fucked up, man.
What the fuck?
- Don't.
Guys, what happened?
Don't even look at me, whore!
All right, I get it.
Everybody hates me.
Fine. Whatever.
Hate me on the way home.
Can we just get the fuck
out of here?
- Yes, please.
- Give me the keys.
Rachel, fuck these people.
I can't believe Sam would
cheat on me with Lisa...
You were right all along, Toby.
Look, just keep it together.
We'll be home soon and you'll
never have to see them again.
We're gonna die in here!
We're not gonna die!
Fuck! Why aren't you starting?!
Oh, my God, oh, my God!
We're gonna fucking die here!
Chill out, Lisa!
Nobody else is dying!
Fucking try!
Just turn it harder!
Shut the fuck up!
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Yo, my steering wheel's fucked!
Ours, too.
What the fuck's going on?
Hey, you guys.
What the hell are you doin'
out here?
Back the fuck up, old man!
What the hell are you
doing here, Old Man River?
I heard screamin'.
Are you guys okay?
Are you now, or have you ever
held a knife?
Well, of course I have.
I ain't got one right now...
You think you can just come here
and go on some sort of
fucked up killing spree?
You misunderstood me.
Her credit... card.
Oh, my God.
I had no choice.
Is he dead?
Did you have no choice
with Bevan, too?
You always have a choice!
I was trying to protect us!
He was just tryin' to deliver
Lisa's credit card, man!
Oh, my God.
He was just tryin'
to do something nice...
and now he's dead!
He was a creepy old man
who followed us!
He probably would have killed
us and raped Lisa and Rachel!
Just because he
brought the credit card,
doesn't make him innocent!
Hold on! Wait! Why wouldn't
he have raped me, too?
Oh, fuck!
I told him our address
when I asked for directions.
Oh, my God.
Now we're all
goin' to hell, man!
No, we're not!
We're not goin' to hell, Jacob!
You're especially
goin' to hell, man!
I mean, I was here
for this atrocity,
so yeah, I'm going to hell,
but you,
you're going
to the darkest fucking part!
Look I'm serious Jacob.
Shut the fuck up!
Man, Dante didn't even explore
the parts you're going to!
All right! We get it!
We're all going to hell!
Let's just move on.
God damnit, Sam!
Holy shit.
Sure you don't
have any more bags...
in the room or something?
Yeah, as sure as I am
that Lisa's not riding the
psychopath's sausage right now.
You wanna fight, bitch?
I will Jiu Jitsu your tits off!
Now's not the time, Lisa!
- Yeah, well...
- Jiu Titsu!
Now's not the fucking time!
- He's gone!
- The old man is gone!
- What?!
- Dude, I thought you said he was fucking dead, man!
I thought he was!
I'm not a fucking doctor!
Fuck, dude!
We have to go look for him!
We have to go fucking look for him!
- Are you kidding me?!
I'm going to stay the hell
away from there!
We-we should all hide
until things settle down!
We need to stick together
right now, Rachel!
So then come with me!
Fuck it!
I'll protect you if these idiots can't
see what the right thing to do is!
- I'm outta here!
- Rachel!
No, fuck!
We'll get her after, man.
Me and you have to go look
for the old man! Let's go.
Don't leave me!
I am not gonna die here.
You guys fucking wait!
Are you joking me right now?!
We need to paint a picture.
An image in our minds
so we can understand
what happened.
We want to protect you, Rachel.
I got you cornered now,
fuck face!
Fuck this shit.
No. No, no, no, no!
No, no, no, no!
Ah, not my dick!
No, no, not my fucking
tip of my dick!
Any luck?
How's it going?
Not good.
This car is fucked.
I can't wait around for this
any longer.
I'm gonna go in
and check in on Sam.
Oh, no. Don't
go in there by yourself.
Sam, come on out!
Sam, come on, this isn't funny!
Stop dicking around!
Sam, is that you?
Sam, if you scare me...
I swear to God
I will cut your balls off.
Oh, my God!
Oh, fuck.
Fuck! Lisa! Are you okay?
No, I-I'm fine.
Look, we gotta get outta here.
No, come here, come here,
come here.
We have to get out of here!
We can't stay here.
Who did this to you?
I don't know.
I can't remember.
No, you need to tell us
what happened!
I don't know! We have to
get out of here, though!
What's going on?
Rachel, did you do this to Lisa?
- What?
- She fucked my boyfriend!
I'm allowed to hate her,
I'm not gonna hurt her.
You look pretty fucked up.
Sam is dead!
Sam is dead!
- What?
- What?
You're not going anywhere,
- Okay.
- Fuck!
Are you fucking crazy?!
You heard me!
For all we know, you killed Sam!
We know you fucked him!
Oh yeah?! And what would
my fucking motive be?!
He didn't make me fucking cum
hard enough?!
Maybe it finally occurred
to you that Sam loves me
and he was just using you
to get off!
This needs to stop right now!
Great fucking reassurance party!
All right?
You know what?
This is the last time
I'm gonna fuckin' tell you
I know Jiu Jitsu, bitch!
Wanna fuckin' push me?
You guys need to chill out!
- Why'd you do it?!
- Do what? Murder him?
Or have him stick his eight and-a-half
inch cock inside my fucking vagina?!
I will end you
in a fucking heartbeat!
Oh, yeah?!
- Get off me, you motherfucker!
- Oh, yeah?!
Hey, Lisa, can we talk?
Now's not really the time
to be mad at each other.
Look. Sam is dead.
All right?
Frankly, I care more
about my life right now
than whether or not
you're mad at me.
that old guy,
from down at the shop,
he made the hike up here,
and he's like 90 years old.
I mean, I could probably
do the opposite.
Maybe there's a land line
down there, or something!
He didn't really do it.
He's dead.
How many times
do I have to tell you?
My foot is crippled!
I can't fucking go anywhere.
Gimp, I'm not asking for you
to come with me.
Honestly I don't trust
any of you.
I'm outta here.
- Good luck.
- This is bullshit.
You're scared.
It's understandable.
Sometimes when you're scared...
it can be therapeutic
to draw what's scaring us.
Can you draw what's scaring you?
Where the fuck did everyone go?
I can't let what happened
to Sam happen to anyone else.
I'm goin' out there
to find Lisa and Rachel.
How many times
do I have to tell you?
My fucking foot is crippled.
I can't walk, Jacob!
Just hang tight
for five minutes, okay?
We've been safe so far
in the kitchen.
They couldn't have gone far!
Are you crazy?
Don't leave me!
Sounds travels in these woods.
The old man said it himself.
If anything happens,
If you see anything,
just scream and I'll hear you.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Please, please don't leave me.
I'll show you my boobs.
No. That's tempting, but no.
I have to do this..
If you're not gonna do
what I say,
then fuck off.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Come here. Come here.
I'm gonna find them.
I'm gonna find them,
and I'm gonna bring them back,
and I'm gonna get us all
out of here.
All right? I'll carry you
on my back if I have to!
Okay? Look at me.
Look at me.
I promise. I promise.
Come back quick. Okay?
I will. I will.
All right, when I leave,
lock the door behind me. Okay?
When I come back,
I'm gonna knock three times
so you know it's me. Okay?
I'm coming back for you.
I promise. All right?
Oh, fuck! Come on!
God, Lisa!
God damnit!
Thank God it's just you.
Wait, you're not gonna
fucking kill me, are you?
Are you serious?!
Rachel, is that you?
It's a labyrinth out here!
Okay, whatever. Listen.
My flashlight died.
We gotta find Rachel,
we gotta get Bonnie,
and we need
to get the fuck outta here.
No, you find Rachel.
I'm gonna go get a flashlight.
- No, we stick together!
- Dude!
She needs you more than I do!
I just need
to be away from you guys.
I'll get a flashlight
and I'll be on my way.
The f...
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!
What did I ever do?
Please don't hurt me!
Help me.
Please don't hurt me.
I'm so disgusting!
Oh, my God!
I'm hideous.
Bonnie! Bonnie!
Come on! Hang in there, Bonnie!
Come on!
Bonnie, I'm coming!
It's done.
Rachel, Rachel, let me see what's going on.
I don't wanna be by myself
right now.
No! No!
What the fuck, man?!
Oh, my God. How did this...
How did this happen? I thought
that you were with her!
Should've never left her!
Oh, my God.
Where were you?
I was lookin' for Lisa!
I was lookin' for you!
- I was here!
- I was hiding!
Oh, my God!
I just wanted us
to stick together!
Where's Lisa?
Is she okay?
I can't believe this shit!
Come on.
What are you doing?
We're not splitting up anymore.
We're sticking together,
we're grabbing Lisa,
and we're getting out of here.
No one leaves my sight
until we're in a safe place.
Why are you even crying?
These people are assholes!
You know that!
What are you talking about?
These people are my friends!
They're human beings,
for God's sake.
Who consistently walk
all over you!
No, they don't!
What the fuck, Rachel?
What's wrong with you, Rachel?!
What-what are you
talking about?
Jacob, we have to get
out of here now!
Why would we do
a thing like that?
The fun's just gettin' started.
Jacob, no!
Shh. Shh, shh. Shh.
What's wrong?
It's nothing.
I'm fine.
Did I do something
to make you mad?
It's not you.
Is there anything
I can do to help?
I just need you to know
that I will always be here.
What do you mean,
always be here, Toby?
Oh, it's just you.
Ready to die?
I know Jiu Jitsu, bitch!
Get the fuck off of me!
Crazy bitch!
Fucking psycho!
Get the fuck off of me!
Get off of me!
What is your emergency?
Psycho killer! In my house!
Please send help!
Please send help!
I can't
understand what you're saying.
I said psycho killer!
What don't you understand!
Fuck! No!
Lisa? Lisa!
Lisa, come here!
Kill... kill the bitch.
Come out and show yourself!
Jacob, thank God you're safe.
Don't you fucking come
any closer!
Easy, Jacob.
I had nothing to do
with any of this.
You hit me in the fucking head!
- It wasn't me.
- Then who was it?!
Rachel, what are you saying?
Toby is the killer!
Am I supposed to know
who that is?!
Toby, my brother
who came with us.
Rachel, what the fuck?!
- Who is Toby?!
You are completely insane,
just like him.
I think you've lost it.
Stop acting stoned!
We have to get out of here
before he gets the both of us!
Don't you understand?
He's going to kill us!
There he is.
There he is!
Run, Jacob! Run!
Rachel, put that down.
Rachel, out that down or
I'm gonna have to fight back.
You need help!
I can get you help!
I don't need help.
Snap out of it, Rachel!
I'm not Rachel.
I'm Toby!
Jesus, you're really
startin' to scare me.
And you're really
starting to piss me off.
I love you.
I love you, too.
The girls would kill me
for recommending it, but...
we should go to your
uncle's house for spring break.
Act like it's your idea, though.
So she's under the
impression that her dead brother
killed all of her friends.
She's clearly insane.
No concrete evidence points her
to these murders,
or the last batch.
You're right.
What she is... is dangerous.
So now what?
This girl enters an entirely
new realm of fucked up.
I need some coffee.
You want?
Black as night.
What are you thinking...
you crazy fuckin' bitch.