Xterminator and the AI Apocalypse (2023) Movie Script

1
(eerie electronic music)
(upbeat music)
(muffled voices on police radio)
- XT, where are you?
- I'm headed for the
Grant Street exit.
- Grant Street?
What about the roof?
- Change of plans,
are you in position?
- I'm on my way, I got
hung up in a meteor storm.
- I don't care what hung you up.
If you are not where
you're supposed to be
when that door opens,
I'll be up shit creek,
as you humans say.
- I'm in turbo drive, XT.
A light year out and closing.
- Push it, mortal.
I'm 10 yards from the door,
and I'm not slowing
down for anything.
- 10-4 butt brain,
I'll be there.
- You'd better be, or else.
- [Voice On Police Radio]
Yes ma'am, we'll be clear,
and G33 will be clear on four.
(upbeat music)
- I'm breaching Earth's
carmen line now.
See you soon.
What the, what is that?
It's the biggest
vessel I've ever seen.
Practically its
own dwarf planet.
Who the hell are they?
(upbeat music)
Whoa.
(alarm sounding)
(astronaut screaming)
(alarm sounding)
(upbeat music)
(muffled police radio)
(astronaut screaming)
(astronaut splatting)
- Attention criminal,
this is Captain Krull of
the automated police force.
You are completely
surrounded, there is no hope.
Option one, give up your
weapons and come out peacefully
and we'll allow you to exist.
Option two, resist and be
cremated on the premises.
- How old school.
The automated police force is
ready to take me into custody,
or destroy me where I stand.
Bet they'll get medals for that.
Planet Earth loves trinkets.
(upbeat music)
- Surrender, enemy.
- On your knees, droid.
(swatting)
- There it is. Hold
your fire troops.
We'll let it decide.
- Greetings, soldiers.
I've considered your proposal
and I've made my decision.
I like option two.
- Have it your way, robot.
Fire!
(guns firing)
(guns firing)
(guns firing)
(guns firing)
(bright music)
- That ought to provide the
ground distraction I need
to get to the roof.
That filthy human had better
be where he's supposed to be.
- The cyborg's taken
cover, fall back troops.
This isn't over by a long shot.
Activate option three,
unleash the X Goliath.
(bright music)
(bright music)
(muffled police radio)
(metallic footsteps)
- Human, where are you?
Human.
Human?
(muffled police radio)
You've got to be kidding.
Show me the way to go home.
I'm tired and I
want to go to bed
I had a little drink
about an hour ago
And it got right to my head
Wherever I may roam
By land or sea or
- [Speaker] Mr. Premier,
the Circular Chiefs
have gathered in the
octagonal office.
They're waiting on your arrival.
- What did I tell you
about interrupting
me, General Sherwood?
- [Sherwood] My apologies sir,
but the chiefs request
your counsel at once.
The situation in
Ananaki has destabilized
to the point of war.
- War?
Yes well, I'm
taking a solo flight
to clear my head.
- A flight? Now?
Sir, I strongly suggest.
- You can suggest
all you like Grace,
Premiers need a break too.
Consider this a little me time.
After all, I've maintained
peace in this mercurial galaxy
since taking office.
Have I not?
- [Sherwood] Well, yes.
- It's settled then.
Tell the chiefs I'll return
before the next sun rotation.
- [Sherwood] And what
shall I tell the rebels
fighting on Ananaki?
- Tell them to handle
their business.
Were they not so hotheaded
we wouldn't be in this mess.
(explosion)
(Premier grunting)
- [Sherwood] Premier Sylus?
Premier Sylus?
- I'm hit, and I'm going down.
I'm gonna crash!
- Mr. Premier, are you there?
Can you hear me?
(ominous music)
- I don't suppose there's
a repair shop around here.
(dark music)
Uh, oh.
- He what?
Crashed where? Is he alive?
- We don't know.
The tracking device in his
cruiser came to a sudden stop
on the western rim of Mars.
It's still active
but hasn't moved.
- What are we waiting for?
He could be injured
in the wreckage.
We need to get out
there right now.
- You read my mind, Guy.
I'm routing us to
the location now.
- No you're not, General.
If the Premier's dead,
the last thing we need to
do is put you in harm's way.
You're his successor,
and this galaxy could
erupt in war at any minute.
It needs a voice of reason.
- I'm going with
you. It's my call.
- It's a bad one.
I'm going alone, and
I'll take the Beetle.
- I could court martial you
for dereliction of duty.
- Wouldn't be the first time.
I'll radio when I'm onsite.
Keep the home fire
burning till we get back.
- Watch your back
out there, Guy.
- Always.
(upbeat electronic music)
I'm at the ship, General.
I don't think Sylus made
it but I don't see a body.
- [Grace] Keep looking
till you're sure.
I don't care if all you find
is a finger, we have to know.
- Copy.
This ground is
like Swiss cheese,
but that, that
looks like a cave.
Good thing I brought
my spelunking gear.
(upbeat electronic music)
Premier?
Premier Sylus,
are you down here?
Damn it.
No body, no blood.
Where are you?
Bad news and good news, Grace.
- Give me the bad news.
- I didn't find him.
- And the good news?
- I didn't find him.
- Fair enough. We'll
keep searching.
- Not far and wide.
I don't think he made it
off that rock, General.
The surface is
porous and riddled
with subterranean catacombs.
He could be anywhere
but I think he is there.
- What do you suggest?
- The sun's just
rotated away from Mars.
That gives us close to
10 hours of darkness.
I want permission
to try a rescue.
- You got it.
How many men do you need?
- Just one.
- One?
Who is it?
- Thanks for joining
us today, Foot.
Your muscle's appreciated.
This prison might be the
highest security facility
in the star system,
but this robot is no
ordinary prisoner.
- Sergeant Fox is
right, Bigfoot.
The cyborg's dangerous and
that's putting it lightly.
- We'll be all right.
Danger's my middle name.
I got your backs.
- Stay alert, men.
That door up ahead is our
last security checkpoint
before we enter
the holding cells.
After that we're on our own.
- You mean I can't count
on all these little dudes
with their pea shooters?
- No.
- Good.
- Hmm.
- [Grace] Don't try
anything, stupid Cyborg.
- Call me X.
Why are we talking?
- We have a deal to offer you.
About an hour ago,
small spacecraft went down
on the surface of Mars.
The Premier was on board.
- So, reschedule the Premier.
- [Grace] That's
not funny, Cyborg.
- Premier Sylus has been almost
single-handedly responsible
for keeping the balance of peace
since the Great
Intergalactic War.
His loss is a huge
blow to the stability
of the Ananaki region.
- [Cyborg] So what
do you want me to do?
Scrape up his remains and
give him a proper burial?
- Smart mouth on
this here metal head.
- [Cyborg] Who's the Muppet?
- Muppet? Tin man,
I'll break your ass.
- [Cyborg] I'm right here.
- Enough, both of you.
- I've already visited
the crash site.
There was no body.
We believe the Premier
is alive, somewhere.
- [Cyborg] Somewhere, huh?
What's in it for me?
- Simply put, survival.
You're set to be
crushed for your crimes.
You've reached the
end of the line.
- Go to Mars, find the Premier.
Bring him back in 24
hours and you're free bot.
What do you say?
- Get a new Premier.
- Our galaxy's on the brink
of another war, Cyborg.
A peace summit was
scheduled to take place
with rebel forces in
the Ananaki system.
- But the ceasefire
expires in 24 hours.
The fighting will intensify,
and almost certainly
spread like wildfire
throughout the cosmos.
- [Cyborg] Mass destruction?
I like it.
- Let me at let this chill.
I'll crush him myself.
- Bring it on, neanderthal.
- Why you son of a-
- Listen, our survival
depends on this.
We nearly went extinct once.
We don't wanna play
with that fire again.
- There are nuclear
weapons in play.
If we don't locate the Premier
so that he can calm down
the chaos in Ananaki,
we fear a space detonation
could open a black hole
and swallow all
life as we know it.
- [Guy] You perish
one way or the other.
Take the deal, you survive.
What's it gonna be, Robot?
- Call me X.
- I'm known as quantum.
I'm here to brief you before
you take off, Xterminator.
- Call me X.
- Very well, X.
You can track and
locate the Premier
through his vital signs,
using a special heat
sensitive device
our lab has created for the job.
Premier Sylus is reptilian
so his body temperature
changes constantly to
match his surroundings,
making traditional methods
of tracking quite difficult.
- I always knew
politicians were snakes.
- That's funny.
I'll relay it to the General.
She may laugh.
- You do that, Quantum.
Where am I landing?
- Not on the planet's
surface directly, I'm afraid.
Forces there may
anticipate another visit,
rendering such a direct
approach perilous.
I'm told this is our
best and last chance
to recover the Premier,
and General Sherwood wishes
to minimize the risk.
Instead, you'll fly
to our space station
near the Mars orbit.
From there you'll
board a motorless pod
and make quiet entry.
- What about radar, camera
surveillance, surface missiles?
- The pod's invisible
to radar detection,
and once in motion,
travels one half second faster
than the speed of light,
effectively evading all known
visual surveillance technology.
As for weaponry,
the pod boasts built in
projectile detection.
If fired upon by most
traditional methods,
it can automatically redirect
its own trajectory, twice.
- What if it's fired
on three times?
- Three times,
you're on your own.
- Comforting.
- Once you land,
you'll find a surface
rover for your use only.
Use the retina scanner
to start its engine.
The mission room is next.
Come see the rest of your gear.
- Who are the butt brains?
- Security.
With the weaponized technology
housed in this wing,
no one has clearance to be
here alone, not even me.
- Hmm, humans and
their trust issues.
- You might say that,
but General Sherwood's
methods have minimized errors
to a negligible percentile.
The surface of Mars
receives precipitation.
Consequently, there are
scattered bodies of water
resulting in thriving
subterranean cavern systems,
as reported by Sergeant Fawkes
following his
initial exploration.
There's also a power
source underground,
but no generators in sight.
We suspect the creators have
harnessed natural energy
by tapping the planet's core.
- Sounds like the humans
could learn a thing or two.
- Indeed, X.
They're already experimenting
with sustainable methods,
should war ensue, and once
again, destabilize the galaxy.
Our last stop is the lab, come.
Just step up on the platform X,
and our briefing will conclude.
- Why do I have to
step on a platform?
- Formality.
I'm going to inject you
with a system stabilizer
that staves off malicious
virus contraction for 24 hours.
- I don't like needles.
- Hmm. Yes.
Whether mortal or AI, few do.
Up you go.
- Make it quick.
- [Quantum] That's it.
- Feels glitchy.
- Merely the upload, it'll
pass before your departure.
- It had better or else.
- I see why Sergeant
Fawkes enlisted you.
Your spaceship is waiting.
(dramatic music)
- [Guy] There it goes.
The Xterminator's lifted off.
You think it'll
stick to the plan?
- It has no choice.
If it doesn't, we'll hit
the button and shut it off.
Why don't we have a little fun
and let it know what those
injections really were.
- Is that smart?
- What are its options?
Turn around and come get us?
The knowledge will
only make that cyborg
work harder and faster
to find Premier Sylus.
You should know how
this works, Guy.
Once the Premier's
safe and sound,
we destroy the cyborg anyway.
Come in, Cyborg.
Cyborg.
Cyborg, what are you doing?
- I'm talking my vessel in
your space station sweetheart.
- Well, quite the vocabulary.
How far out are you?
- In sight, I'll
make entry soon.
- This conversation
feels strange.
- Maybe you should get your mind
out of the proverbial
gutter, General.
- Amusing, for a hunk
of self-actualized AI.
- A hunk, me?
General, if I didn't know
better, I'd say you had a crush.
- You oughta know better.
I want to tell you something
before you reach the station.
- Tell me what?
- That idea you had about
turning the ship
around 180 degrees
and flying off to planet Kerr.
Not gonna happen.
See, we snuck in a
little insurance policy.
The injection you
received in our lab
wasn't to ward off viruses.
It implanted one.
- What?
- That's right, Cyborg.
You're infected with one of our
designer weaponized viruses.
The worm's already multiplying,
bonding to your memory
and all backups.
In 22 hours you'll go into
complete system failure.
Total hard disc erasure.
You'll crash and burn, unless.
- Unless what, you lying swine?
- Unless you return
Premier Sylus to us
on time and in one piece.
Do that and we'll run
the antiviral program
that completely
eradicates the infection.
Try to escape or not
get the job done,
you're back to a death sentence.
- When I get back,
I'm going to kill you.
- See you soon, Cyborg.
- You're not
concerned about that?
- Guy, do you have any
idea how many times
I've been threatened
in my lifetime?
- This is a little bit
different, it's the Xterminator.
- It's all the same.
A threat's a threat, and no
bot's gonna stop me, ever.
- Those no good rotten
conniving disease-riddled humans
think they've outsmarted me.
My AI programming runs circles
around their fully developed
brains at three months.
Let them have their tricks,
their games, and their cons.
When they're soft necks are
in my cold steel grasps,
their laughter will be replaced
by tearful please for mercy,
and there shall be none.
Impressive space station
the humans have built.
When this is over
and my titanium
is drenched in their warm blood,
I'll wash off here,
and then rip their
impressive station apart,
pole by pole.
(light music)
- Well, if it isn't the lovely
and vivacious General Sherwood?
To, what do we owe the
distinct pleasure, hmm?
- Save the flowery
epithets, warden.
You know who I'm here to see,
and you're not doing his
mental health any favors
by keeping him in
complete isolation.
Buzz me in.
(door buzzing)
It's been a long
time, Megalodon.
We meet again.
- We have to stop
running into each other
in places like this, General.
I'd much rather see
you in the open sea
where no electric barriers
can keep us apart.
- I'm sure you would,
but we'll have to
settle for this.
- Bummer.
- I wanted to talk to you.
I have a deal you
may be interested in.
- I'm listening.
- I want you to do
something for me.
A space cruiser crashed on Mars.
We believe it was shot down.
Premier Sylus was on board.
- Am I supposed to
know who that is?
- Just that he's very
important to our galaxy.
He's a peacekeeper, and
they're in short supply
since the great
intergalactic war.
The Premier's missing
and we want him back.
- And you want me to find him?
What will you do for me General?
- Return the Premier to us
safely and I'll set you free.
(Megalodon laughing)
- Who would sign off on that?
- No one in their right mind.
But I can initiate a transfer,
and can have the
guard stand down
while you conveniently escape.
- And when the shark hunt is on,
am I to spend the
rest of my days
looking over my dorsal fin?
- It'll be a dragnet on paper
only, no one will hunt you.
Then I'll transport
you to Planet Shirah,
where you'll live off
the galactic grid.
You can take it
over for all I care.
The only caveat is that
you never show your teeth
in our neck of the cosmos again.
- Hmm.
Why me?
- [Grace] You're the
most destructive creature
I could think of.
And there are perils involved.
The Xterminator is also
looking for Premier Sylus.
- The Xterminator?
Then why do you need me?
- Because I don't like
or trust the cyborg.
His involvement was
my sergeant's idea,
and I think it was a mistake.
I want Xterminator out of
the picture permanently.
- That's a tall order, General.
I want more than exile.
I want my minions back.
- Done.
Your team of science bots
are still in my employ.
Find the Premier,
destroy the Xterminator and
I'll return them to you.
Do we have a deal?
- You're desperate.
- I'm motivated. Are you?
- Yes.
(tense music)
- [Warden] General
Sherwood, can I have a word?
- What is it?
(warden laughing)
- [Warden] You are
aware that conversations
are monitored here, yes?
- What's your point?
- [Warden] Well, did
I hear you correct?
Did you just offer to spring
the Megalodon from prison?
- No, it wasn't an offer.
It was a statement of fact.
I'm borrowing the
Mag for a while,
and if he fulfills his
end of the bargain,
I'm taking him off
your hands, for good.
Your guard staff should
breathe the sigh of relief.
- [Warden] Yes, well
I, I wasn't consulted.
- Because I don't need to.
I know what you do
around here, warden.
And if you want me to continue
looking the other way,
you'll do as I say.
The transfer papers will
be on your desk in an hour.
Have the Mag ready?
- [Warden] Yes ma'am,
don't worry about a thing.
Nothing at all.
- This thing moves fast
for being motorless.
When I murder that
double-talking general,
I'll have to remember
to come back for it.
(craft falling)
This planet's a dust bowl.
I can't see clearly
beyond 10 yards.
The Premier could be
standing right in front of me
and I wouldn't know it.
I see no signs of life anywhere.
Must find an entrance to those
caverns the humans spoke of.
That's got to be where I'll
find him, dead or alive.
(land rover running)
- This is really outta
left field Johnson,
and the break of dawn?
It's early for a move like this.
- The general must want
to keep it a secret.
- Yeah, but why?
What's going on?
- Beats me.
I guess it's need to know
and we don't need to know.
- Chicks.
(both laughing)
- Who has got the call, Behram?
- Holmes and Johnson should
be waiting at the next stop.
- Holmes, I hate that guy.
- You and everybody else.
Good team lead though,
gets the job done.
- Whatever man.
I could use a triple
stacked breakfast sandwich
from Space Jack's.
You in?
- We're on a tight
schedule, Ramirez.
- We're gonna pass right
by at the corner of 53rd.
I'll buy.
- We gotta make it quick.
- Mm-mm.
Space Jack's makes the
best breakfast sandwiches.
- You guys got Space Jack's? Mm.
- Anyone know why we're
moving the Megalodon?
- No clue.
I even reread the
text three times,
thought it had to be a screw up.
- You're not the only one.
I actually checked the calendar
to see if it was
April Fool's day.
- Doesn't matter
why we're doing it.
They have a reason.
We've got to draw.
We gotta keep our heads
on a swivel and work snug.
No room for errors.
- Behram's right.
Any slipups, no
matter how slight,
and the Meg could get loose.
We can hardly afford to blink.
- That's reassuring.
- Good day, gentleman.
- No chit chat Shark.
Turn around and face the wall.
Fins behind your back.
- Are we going somewhere?
- You're in for a transfer,
you're coming with us.
- Wonderful.
I can't wait to
get some fresh air.
- We what?
Why the hell would we do that?
- I'm with Guy.
Has the Meg ever had a move
where he didn't
attempt to escape?
- Attempting and doing
are two different
things, Wrathchild.
The shark's never fled
custody, and never will.
- I don't know, Grace,
it seems mighty risky.
Especially with the
Xterminator on the loose.
- It's not on the loose, Foot.
It's working for us.
It's under our boots
and when it's finished,
we'll stamp it out just like
it's sentencing would call for.
- But why couldn't
we at least wait
until the X came back in?
It's only 24 hours.
- Like I said, we
detected security risks
when we went to talk
to the Xterminator.
I decided we're better
safe than sorry,
so I signed the transfer
papers and sent in the team.
- May I ask who's handling it?
- Holmes, Johnson,
Behram and Ramirez.
- Ramirez?
You've gotta be kidding me.
He was court
martialed last year.
He's dirtier than Foot's toes.
- He watch it now.
- I've kept a close
tab on Ramirez.
He's been squeaky clean.
There's no cause for concern.
- Where's the Meg being taken?
- [Grace] Our new
maximum security facility
in the Devonian realm.
A chartered plane's transporting
him to the launchpad now.
- [Guy] Shackled and
muzzled I presume.
- And at gun point.
- Don't worry, the shark will
have eyes on him every second.
Now, let's get down to business.
Any word from the Xterminator?
- Damn this infernal wasteland.
I must have combed
a hundred miles.
- Xterminator, come in.
- I'm in the rover Fawkes,
but I see no signs
of life anywhere.
- Keep looking. The
Premier's got to be there.
- I think your
man's dead sergeant.
Either he was
obliterated in the crash,
or somebody's had
him for dinner.
- Then find that somebody.
If we can't find Premier Sylus,
we need answers, for
the sake of the galaxy.
- Hang on, I see something
a few yards up ahead.
- Approach with caution, Cyborg.
It could be a trap.
- Thanks.
- [Grace] Talk to us, Cyborg.
What do you see?
Cyborg.
Cyborg.
- It turned you off, General.
- Ha.
- [Grace] It's not funny, Foot.
(Guy laughing)
- Do you come in
peace, traveler?
- If I don't, you'll
live in peaces alien.
- But this is my home.
That makes you the alien.
Whatever you are.
- Who are you?
- My name is Penru, a
member of the Byair tribe.
- Where are the others?
- Around.
They only allow themselves
to be seen when they wish.
- So they're underground.
- What gives you that idea?
- I heard about the caverns.
- Ah, the spelunker.
We monitored him closely.
Our elders deemed
his visit harmless,
more curious than hostile.
So we allowed him
to go on his way.
- Your elders are fools.
Never trust a human.
- I, I thought I knew your face.
Wow, the Xterminator.
I thought they dismantled you.
What are you doing on Mars?
- Looking for somebody.
- Oh. Who?
- The Premier.
- Oh, the crash landing.
- That's right.
Take me to him and
I'll let you live.
- My kind harbor's no ill
will toward you Xterminator.
- Call me X.
I need a guide and I
want to see the caverns,
and I want the Premier.
- I'd show you the catacombs
as you request X but,
you won't find
the Premier there.
- Where then?
- About five miles east of here.
I can provide
coordinates if you like.
- Tell me and beat it.
We have nothing else to discuss.
- I should tell you, there
is a colony base out there.
A single human who came in
peace and won over our elders.
He calls himself Woody.
- [X] Does he
harbor the Premier?
- [Penru] He does not.
He lives off the grid,
avoids other humans.
I suspect he had a bad
time of it on earth.
He will likely try
to befriend you.
- I don't do friends.
I'll collect Premier Sylus
and I'll be on my way.
(tense music)
- Now, you just stay put
right where you are Meg.
We're watching your every move.
There's nowhere to
run and no way out,
so just relax and
enjoy the ride.
- Oh I plan to, baits.
I plan to.
- You know we thought you'd
be more reluctant to fly,
being an aquatic animal and all.
- It's not flying that
concerns me, plankton.
It's crashing.
- Yeah, join the club.
And just to put
your mind at ease,
we are all top tier
engineers and mechanics,
and the flight crew
are decorated veterans.
Our planes don't crash.
Besides, Johnson here set down
a Cessna in his rookie year.
- From 14,000 feet, nose
dive for the last two,
straight down.
- And it doesn't happen twice,
so there's nothing
to worry about.
We'll reach the launch
pad within the hour,
then off you go.
- Sounds fun, chum.
It's been very nice
chatting with you morsels.
Since our time
together is almost up,
I think I'll quite
miss our repartee.
- [Ramirez] Maybe we'll
visit you sometime.
- I doubt it.
I highly doubt it.
- Who's up for shots?
I'm gonna raid the galley.
- [Johnson] See if
we have any crown.
If not, Jack'll do.
- Gotcha.
(explosion)
- What was that?
- Engine two just blew.
Captain, pressure
is dropping fast.
- [Johnson] What?
(Megalodon laughing)
- [Behram] We're going
down, we're gonna crash.
- [Johnson] Is everyone okay?
- [Ramirez] I'm here, and
I snagged a fifth of Crown.
You want a hit Johnson?
- [Johnson] Where's the Meg?
Does anyone see the Meg?
Where's Holmes?
Holmes!
(Holmes groaning)
- Guys, guys, I
can't feel my legs,
can't move.
The water.
Water's rising.
- [Johnson] Outta
the water everyone,
that shark could be loose.
Shit, climb onto the
plane if you can.
- The stashed an escape cruiser,
just like they promised.
Let's see how she handles.
(tense music)
- That bubble-headed alien
better not have sent me
on a wild goose chase.
Lest I return and slaughter
her whole species,
saving her for last.
That rotten alien,
that no good swine.
They killed him and
picked his bones clean.
They killed the Premier.
There goes my last
bargaining chip.
The mortals have no reasons
to keep their word to me now.
The only way out is to get
my hands on their antivirus,
and kill them all.
- General, we just got
a report from the tower.
The plane transporting
the Megalodon
has dropped off the radar.
- What do you mean it's
dropped off the radar?
- They were cruising at
altitude and something happened.
The aircraft dipped 5,000
feet in less than 10 seconds
before radar lost it.
- They crashed?
- We're tapping the area's
surveillance drone now,
we should know shortly.
I told you moving the Meg
was a bad idea, Grace.
- You don't make the
decisions around here, Guy.
- Maybe I should.
- Yeah? And just how do you
plan to do that, Sergeant?
- I think you need
some time off.
Your methods are
becoming unsound.
- My methods are none of
your goddamn business.
- I beg to differ.
- General Sherwood,
drone four is showing
aerial footage from the site.
It doesn't look good.
- They went down in the water.
Do we have communication?
Is anyone alive?
- There's been no
reply, I'm afraid.
I fear the flight
crews in grave danger.
- Damn it all.
They shouldn't be in this mess.
We may have lost a whole crew,
and unleashed the
Megalodon into the cosmos.
- We'll finish this
conversation later, Sergeant.
Send a rescue vessel
right away, Bort.
Round up as many of
our people as possible,
and issue an immediate
intergalactic KBB on the Meg.
Unless he's in pieces
on the ocean floor,
I want that shark found.
(upbeat music)
- To be free.
I nearly forgot what
the galaxy smells like.
I don't know what
I'd rather do more.
Tear the Xterminator
limb from limb,
or return the Premier
with one less leg.
I guess I'll make
up for the lost time
and do both. (laughing)
- Hi there, welcome
to my new Mars colony.
I come in peace with respect
to all species and cultures.
Would you like a hot tamale?
(Woody screaming)
(slashing)
- The humans are
so easy to butcher,
like lambs to the slaughter.
If I had taste buds, I'm
sure they'd be delectable.
This vessel is
quite comfortable.
Those lying pigs expecting
me to sit in the Mars dust,
and call them for pickup
like a ride share.
They won't expect this.
I'll drop the Premier's
bones at their quaking feet,
then send them to join
him in whatever hell
roasts his reptilian soul.
But first, the antivirus.
- [Grace] Lying down
on the job, Guy?
- Just getting a
little chiropractic
adjustment, General.
I hold all my job stress
in my neck and shoulders.
- There's no need to stress.
We're handling our business.
- Is that what you call it?
The Xterminator and the
Megalodon are on the loose.
Premier Sylus is
missing or dead,
and the galaxy's about
to go to war again.
Okay.
- Dr. Moreau, may we
have some privacy?
- I'm not sure I want privacy
with the General, Doc.
- It's not a request
Sergeant, it's an order.
- Fritz is performing
electric stimulation therapy
on Sergeant Fawkes, General.
Interrupting will
negate its benefits.
May he remain to monitor
the Sergeant's vitals?
- Sure.
Fritz's brain is fried
like an egg anyway.
All he hears and sees
is blips and code.
He can continue.
We'll call you when we're
finished, Dr. Moreau.
- As you wish, General.
- I fear we've gotten off track
regarding our duties, Guy.
I wanted to talk about that.
- Do we have to do this now?
Fritz, can I sit up?
- Certainly Sergeant.
You'll be finished in a moment.
- Thanks.
General, I don't know what's
going on with you lately,
but your judgment's
not what it should be.
Moving the Meg was stupid,
and it bit us on the ass
like I said it would.
- You sprung the Xterminator
from decommissioned row.
I sprung the Meg from prison.
Seems like we're even.
- This isn't a contest, Grace.
The survival of the galaxy
hangs in the balance.
- I've been doing this longer
than you have, Sergeant,
and I have rank.
You're welcome to your opinion,
but we do things my way.
- You've made that
abundantly clear.
- Have I?
If you're intent on pulling
in another direction,
we could discuss reassignment.
- [Guy] Or we could go
before the judges tribunal
and see what they think.
- Are you threatening me?
- I'm just saying,
we have options.
- Well, in that
case, try this one.
Fritz?
(beeping)
(Guy grunting)
That looks like it hurts.
What number is that Fritz?
- Number 11, General Sherwood.
- 11?
That can't feel good.
It was set to what, two?
- Yes, madam.
- That'll teach you to
challenge my authority, Guy.
And unfortunately reassignment's
no longer on the table.
Your duty ends here.
Thank you for your service.
Fritz.
(ominous music)
- What have we here?
A launcher coming from Mars?
Who might you be?
Attention pilot.
Identify yourself or prepare
to be blasted from the stars.
- Blast from the stars?
Just try it, space rogue.
You offend a war machine.
- Ah, the Xterminator.
I suspected it was you but
I heard you were dismantled.
- You and everybody else.
Who am I speaking with?
- It's me, Robot.
The one and only Megalodon.
- Meg? I thought your
voice sounded familiar.
I heard you were serving 12
life sentences in a human gulag.
- Yes, but you know the mortals,
always looking to cut a deal.
- Indeed, what did
they promise you?
- [Megalodon] My freedom.
- [X] In exchange for?
- In exchange for
destroying you.
(explosion)
- Damn.
- So in closing,
I'd like to reiterate
that Sergeant Guy Fawkes
exemplified the very best
of what we all strive to be.
His honor, bravery,
and utter selflessness
in combat and duress are
traits we can all learn from.
May he rest in peace.
Bort, if you would,
open the airlock and
send our good Sergeant
to his final frontier.
- As you command,
General Sherwood.
(beeping)
- What in the stars
happened, Fritz?
The sergeant was perfectly
fine when I left.
And now this?
- It's quite
inexplicable, Doctor.
One moment he was
fine and the next
he was no more.
- Did something go
wrong with our systems?
Did he say anything?
Did he suffer.
- Negative.
We concluded the electric
stimulation session
and suddenly he collapsed.
I rushed to his aid but he
flat-lined almost immediately.
And revival proved unsuccessful.
- It makes no sense.
It's fantastic.
- Is it a bad time?
- General Sherwood,
I'm beside myself.
There's no good explanation
for what happened.
- We're all shaken, Doctor.
But if I know one thing,
it's that Guy would want us
to carry on for our own sakes.
- I'd like to conduct a
thorough autopsy myself,
if that is all right.
- That won't be
necessary, Dr. Moreau.
The Sergeant's already
been laid to rest.
- Laid to rest?
- Per his wishes.
We discussed it quite often.
He was adamant that we
not pause in his memory,
but remain vigilant
on all fronts.
- Where is the
body if I may ask?
- Jettisoned into deep space.
The stars are where
Guy was happiest.
It's only fitting that he
spend eternity among them.
- I see, I, I don't
know what to say.
- There's nothing
to say, Doctor.
Just resume your work, for Guy.
Bigfoot, come in.
Are you there?
- I'm here, lady.
I mean, General.
What's up?
- With the unfortunate
passing of Sergeant Fawkes,
I have an offer for you.
- Huh?
Some Sasquatches dream
of a call like this.
Talk to me.
- You've been a
reliable soldier for us
since the day you
joined our team.
How would you like to be ranked?
- Ranked?
You talking about size?
'Cause you know I'm
pretty confident.
- I have no doubt, but I'm
not talking about size.
I want you to do something
for me, right now.
- Damn, well since
you put it like that.
- I've given you
level A clearance,
effective immediately.
I want you to direct
an alpha crash override
on the Rune prison
planet at once.
- An alpha override, but, but,
that'll crash the power grid.
The prison will be unsecured,
wide open like a playground
for the galaxy's
biggest lunatics.
- Are you disobeying
a direct order, Foot?
Because I can just as easily
strip you of your rank
and court martial
your furry ass.
- Well, since you
put it that way.
(prisoners shouting)
(gates opening)
(implements clanging)
(monster roaring)
- Going somewhere? (laughing)
- Oh, this baby's
got some horsepower.
Finders keepers.
It's time to make the
friendly skies spookier.
Come on gang, let's
fly. (laughing)
Woo, what's this button do?
(explosion)
(monster laughing)
I'm free to do what I want
any old time.
- Code red, all
prisoners have escaped.
I repeat, all
prisoners have escaped.
(monster laughing)
- What have we here?
Are you seeing this, Cosgo?
(Cosgo growling)
(explosion)
- Looks like our dance will
have to wait, Xterminator.
Someone's cutting in.
- What?
Who are these clowns?
- Mind your tongue, wind up toy.
And this universe
is full of clowns,
but I'm the baddest. (laughing)
(explosion)
- No time for this.
(explosions)
- Hot damn.
Looks like war's unavoidable.
This whole galaxy
gonna pop like a pinata
with these crackpots in charge.
Why can't we all just get along?
I think it's high time I
got outta here for a while.
Back to nature,
back to my roots,
'sides, a little hibernation
does a Sasquatch good.
Maybe I'll wake
up, maybe I won't.
Maybe I'll just sit there for
a while, see what happens.
(wind blowing)
- Damn it.
I thought a galactic riot
would be good for us,
provide distraction and
cover for the cyborg
to get his titanium
ass back here.
Now it's caught in the
middle of a space melee.
Cyborg, what is
going on out there?
- I'm indisposed at the moment.
Hit me up later.
- Is the Premier with you?
- Yes.
- [Grace] Thank Heavens.
Are you coming back
to headquarters?
- That's the idea.
We'll see how it goes.
- We've got your back Cyborg.
Our laser shields are up,
but we can't help you in the
middle of that dog fight.
You have to get to our
sector eight loading hanger.
- You mean you can't reel me in?
- No.
- Good.
- Just bring the Premier
back in one piece, Cyborg.
- One piece, huh?
You got it.
- General Sherwood,
rebel forces are once again
clashing in the Ananaki system.
Armadas have mobilized
between planet Earth and Mars.
They're in a standoff.
We're moments away
from intergalactic war.
- Listen to me, Bort.
Premier Sylus will
be here shortly.
- The Premier's alive.
That's fantastic news.
- We have to stall.
A few minutes are all we need
for the Premier to
address the fighting.
Gather the news media for a
live broadcast, galaxy wide.
Galaxy wide.
(tense music)
- Going somewhere, X.
- The antivirus.
- Thought you'd never ask.
Right this way.
That's it.
(dramatic music)
The General's ordered
an immediate live
media conference, X.
I understand Premier
Sylus is with you.
- He is.
- Wonderful, he's to
address the galaxy at once.
Where is he?
- Nearby, he's
ready when you are.
But I have one question.
- Of course.
Anything you want, just name it.
- I'd like to
introduce the Premier.
- Introduce the Premier?
Certainly.
Between us, it's a deft move.
It will redraft public
perception of you.
You may even find yourself
with a new press secretary job.
- Hmm.
We'll see.
- We're about to go live.
Is the Premier here?
(beeping)
- We're live in three,
two, one, you're on.
- Greetings.
You all know me,
who I am and what I do.
Recently I found
myself apprehended,
facing this galaxy's
harshest penalty.
I'm sure some of you
would be glad to see me
smelted into a silvery puddle.
Alas, the humans offered
a deal, as humans do.
And having no other
recourse, I accepted.
Now, as I stand here
before the universe,
I fulfilled my end
of the bargain.
And much to my surprise, the
humans have fulfilled theirs.
- Clock's ticking.
Cut to the chase, Cyborg.
- I understand the cosmos now
teeters on the brink of war,
something I know only too well.
I love the screams
of the damned,
and the smell of
charred enemies.
And I especially love the
looks on idealistic faces
when they realize, despite
their naive yearnings,
that there is no hope.
- Jesus Christ.
Bort, tell the
Cyborg to wrap it up,
or cut this live feed and
rejoin when the Premier appears.
- Understood, General.
- Flesh and blood life
is fleeting, meaningless.
You all strive, toil,
suffer, and ultimately die.
And despite it all,
your best efforts are
mocked and forgotten
even before your
rancid corpses rots.
- Time, Xterminator.
Introduce Premier Sylus, please.
- Well, it looks
like our time's up,
as was the Premier's,
as yours soon shall be.
Without further ado,
I give you, your
beloved Premier Sylus.
(eerie music)
- [Grace] Cutaway Bort, cutaway.
(people shouting)
(light jazz music)
- [Voice On Radio] Central,
commencing perimeter search.
- Well, well, if it isn't my
good friend, General Sherwood,
how's your galaxy?
- Better by the minute since
we took you back into custody.
And don't worry,
our Cosmos Commando
Team is busy rounding up
the escaped prisoners
as we speak.
At the rate they're going,
Every one of those monsters
should be apprehended
by sunrise.
- You there, halt.
Do not move, hands
where I can see 'em.
Shut out that light and
get your on the ground,
or I will shoot you
where you stand.
- Shoot me?
What about due process, Officer?
Last I checked,
it wasn't illegal
for a jack-o-lantern
to have a good time. (laughing)
- Well aren't you
special, General.
- Your words, not mine.
That was quite a stunt you
pulled at headquarters, X.
I hope you enjoyed it.
- I did.
Thank you for the opportunity.
- Don't thank me.
You'll never see the light
of day again after that.
- Ultraviolet rays
are overrated.
- I could say the same about AI.
- And yet it won't be long
before my AI replaces your
species in the cosmos, Grace.
- Maybe, maybe not.
Don't forget, we made you.
It's up to us to step aside
and let you take over.
- You will when it counts.
You humans always fail.
- You're one to talk.
You'll be incarcerated
until the next big bang.
- Only because you lying
maggots reneged on your deal.
- It has nothing to do with us.
You overplayed your hand.
Parading the Premier's corpse
in front of the entire
universe was a dumb move,
even for a tin man like you.
- Human compassion.
- You want compassion? Fine.
I have a job for you,
if you choose to accept.
We'd make one hell of a team, X.
- The name's Cyborg.
(wind blowing)
(people hooting and whistling)
- I thought I smelled blood.
- Keen senses Meg,
keep it that way.
- Don't worry, I plan to.
- [Grace] Looks like you're
doing well with your old gang.
- [Meg] Yes, I got the
bots back together.
- [Grace] Planning to
wreak havoc, I presume.
- [Meg] You know me.
- Yes, yes I do.
And that's why I have
another deal for you.
- No one's surfaced
since yesterday.
Safe to say, they're all dead.
Rest in peace, bros.
It's kind of chill out
here all by myself.
Huh.
This is exactly how I
envisioned retirement.
Without all the guys
to chum the water,
maybe I can catch
some of these waves.
Or maybe not.
(dramatic electronic music)
(X breathing heavy)