Zara Hatke Zara Bachke (2023) Movie Script

'Everyone in this country,
dreams of having,'
'a little place to call home,'
'where they'll make
the best memories of their lives,'
'and make it their divine abode.'
'We too have the same dream.'
'Today's our second anniversary,'
'and to celebrate we're
visiting our dream home. Rather,'
'We're just living in the moment,'
'and we need your blessings.'
"Look, I've seen a dream."
"Our home is in a
valley of flowers."
"What a nice weather it is."
"Where are you?"
- "I'm coming, coming, coming, coming.
- Do come."
"So beautiful is this dream."
"Our home is in
a valley of flowers."
"What a nice weather it is."
"Where are you?"
- "I'm coming, coming, coming, coming.
- Do come."
- Happy birthday to you!
- Hey, not birthday
it's their anniversary.
You are too much!
it's their wedding birthday.
Come on, get on with it.
- Happy anniversary...
- you!
Cut it up and share
it with everyone.
- Cut big pieces, too.
- Fine.
- That's not fair, Mehjabeen.
- It has been two years.
Can I have some more cake?
It's delicious!
What flavour is it?
Tooti-Fruti, Mom.
- It's good, right?
- Yeah.
Who cares about the flavor!
It's cake, enjoy it!
- Eat some more!
- Sure.
It's just okay, Sister-in-law.
Give me the slice
with the cherry on top!
- Give it to her.
- Give it here.
For you.
Happy wedding anniversary
to the cutest couple in Indore!
This girl remembers everything
about Kapil.
She's been like that
since they were kids.
- Really?
- How could she forget, Uncle?
She's our best friend.
Kapil's and now mine.
Hello! Hello!
Myself Manoj Bhagel B-A-L-L-B - RRB.
The best damn divorce
lawyer in Indore.
Is your husband being a jerk?
Is your wife ruining your life?
Call Manoj.
Call today, divorce tomorrow.
Isn't it good?
Since when did you
start eating eggs, huh?
- Eggs? No!
- Eggs?
- No!
- Don't lie!
I am not lying, Mom.
- See for yourself. It contains eggs.
- He is a kid.
He just blabbers.
They tricked us into eating eggs
and hurt our religious feelings!
Who does that?
God help me!
now we have to purify ourselves
with Holy Ganges water.
Sajjan drank it all yesterday.
You have cow's urine at home,
don't you?
Now don't say that
Sajjan drank that as well.
Mom, I swear I had
ordered an eggless cake.
Of course, you had!
Don't lie, girl.
Don't even bother.
It has the red dot
and even I know what that means.
- Come on, Kapil, you should have checked!
- Aunt.
Trust me,
Dad, we ordered an eggless cake.
- We couldn't park the bike so...
- Shut up.
Oh God, she must've fed you
all kinds of meat by now.
Why are you exaggerating, Mom?
I accept it's my fault, Mom.
Let bygones be bygones now.
Don't eat the cake.
- We'll order another cake.
- Dear.
You Punjabis are all the same!
That's not true, Aunty.
You guys are so forward!
I'm sure your mother loves to drink
with your father.
So now we too should start drinking
with the sun comes up?
- What are you saying, Aunty?
- Calm down.
Just calm down.
Sit with me.
- Why stop there?
- Somya...
Go on and say that
Punjabi girls are crafty.
- When did I say that?
- Sister?
By the way, we start drinking only
after the sun goes down.
Somya, Somya...
They have a problem
with everything I do!
That's not true.
Mom didn't like me teaching
at the coaching center.
And you... you have been causing trouble
since the moment you came here.
Your snarky comments never stop.
What's your problem?
Kapil and I gave you our room
- when you lost your house.
- Somya... stop.
"Aunty's back hurts,
let her sleep on the bed."
It's been six months
and we've been sleeping
in the living room,
but I never complained.
You guys always like to
make a big deal out of nothing.
- Go on!
- It's not so, Somya.
- Don't, Kapil.
- Listen...
You did us a huge favor
by giving us your room!
Come here, let me felicitate you.
Stop it, Aunty.
- Come here.
- Don't bother, Kapil.
We came here in a time of
need thinking you are our family.
Hey but...
Sister, you should have told
us if Somya had a problem with it.
The cake is all yours.
- No one else will eat it.
- Of course.
I'll just throw it away.
Stop it!
I have an early class tomorrow.
Why are you mad at me?
Uncle's family has been
crashing here for six months
and we don't have our own room,
so there's no privacy.
To top it off,
they've been dissing my parents.
But they needed a place to stay,
so what else could we do?
You know how Aunty's nature is.
She's got no filter on her.
She'll act like nothing
happened in the morning.
Hey, don't cry like that or this 5-star
chocolate will be pissed at you.
- Kapil...
- Hmm?
Kapil, you always
think things through.
Tell me straight up,
are we gonna get our
own house in the future?
In the future?
It's as good as done, girl.
We've already scouted out the place.
We'll chat with Mr. Rastogi
to seal the deal tomorrow.
Mrs. Somya, you're gonna have your
own keys to your new house soon enough.
Happy anniversary.
Happy second anniversary!
Hey Sajjan, what's going on?
Can't sleep.
What are you searching
for in the fridge?
Can't sleep.
And what does it have
to do with the fridge?
I said I can't sleep.
We may not own the place,
but we still pay for
the electricity bill,
so close the fridge and come here.
Sale! Sale!
Look Somya,
there's a big sale on shoes.
Kapu, we are going to buy a house.
Please don't act cheap over there.
These high-class societies
have a certain standard.
So now, I'll have to borrow
manners to talk like the rich?
Stop it, Kapu!
- Stop! Stop! Stop!
- What is it?
Let's buy a nameplate.
Hold on, let's buy the house first.
We're already here,
why not just get it now?
We won't need to
search for it later.
- Come with me.
- Somya...
- Let's go.
- But Somya...
Let's go!
How much for this one?
That's crazy! I could get a better
one at Anand Bazaar for just 200.
And this one?
Did you use blood instead
of ink for that one?
I know I could get
it for 350 at Siyaganj.
What about this one?
It's classy, right?
It's for 5000!
- We could get a better deal at--
- Ma'am,
you only buy a house
once in your life.
You should finalize it.
If he could,
he'd put a CNG kit in Mercedes.
Like you have ever
ridden a Mercedes.
- Finalize it.
- Wait, what?
- Somya, let's reconsider.
- What name do you want on it?
Kapil Dubey, Somya Dubey.
Somya Chawla Dubey.
Welcome to Devdutt Builders.
No, thank you.
Come on, take it. It's free.
Thank you.
Take it.
Remember what I said, Kapu?
It's fresh.
- You done?
- Yep. It was delicious.
- Mr. Dubey!
- Mr. Rastogi!
- How are you?
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- Hey!
Did you check out the place?
- Yeah, we did.
- Yeah!
Did you like it?
We loved it!
That's awesome to hear.
Everything looks good
with the documents, Mr. Dubey.
Now we just need to go to
the Royal Bank and apply for a loan.
- Okay.
- Sure thing.
I'm sure the bank will offer easy
payment options for the 5.5 million loan.
We don't want you guys
to be burdened by it.
5.5 million?
Wait, didn't the Radio Ad say it
- was worth 3.5 million?
- Exactly.
You don't get it.
You chose a deluxe
flat worth 4.5 million
that includes a gym, club,
and parking space.
You'll need to pay for those too.
- Parking?!
- Yes.
- But we don't even own a car.
- Right.
He's a yoga instructor,
so we won't need the gym either.
And we aren't really
the clubbing type, so...
Ma'am, do you plan on riding
on the back of a scooter forever?
Don't worry about the amount,
I'll make sure the bank
gives you easy payment options.
Easy payment options?
Who is gonna pay
double installments?!
Mr. Dubey, I think, this
house is a bit over your budget.
Maybe I need to teach
you the Cobra Stretch.
It's the only way you'll get rid
of that twitchy arrogance.
Hey, don't talk like that!
The starting range of
this site is 4.5 million.
You see Mr. Rastogi,
we've already ordered a nameplate,
so we'll have a house
in the main city.
Save my number,
I'll invite you to the housewarming
party. Make sure you do come!
Alright, let's go, Kapu.
- His Chi is misaligned.
- Chi?
Hey man, can I get soda and glass?
And throw in a straw too.
Thanks a lot.
This city is full of crazy.
We went out to buy a house and
it made us realize where we stand.
Don't be stupid.
Who are these no-good people
to tell us our place?
No need to stress,
we'll figure it out.
- You promise?
- Promise.
Crazy girl.
So, the formula is MgO...
Stand up.
I said stand up!
Read what formula
he wrote in his book.
My heart, my soul, you make me whole
but you also smell like a troll
so grab a shower when you get home!
Do you seriously think any girl
is going to dig you for your punky face?
Trim this crazy mane!
Maybe then, your brain will get
enough oxygen to understand something.
Silence, I say!
Thank you, Aunty!
Here dear, grab one.
Did you have another
grandchild, Aunty?
Tell your son to control himself.
Has he ever heard
of family planning?
No ma'am, I didn't become a grandma.
I won a house through the scheme.
What scheme?
The Government Housing Scheme.
My husband had applied for it.
- Can I have a look at it?
- Here you go.
Public Housing Scheme.
Congratulations, Aunty.
I'll take one.
- Sure. Go for it.
- Thank you.
Good afternoon.
Hey, Mrs. Somya!
You in a rush?
Hey, Dimpy Sir.
Just heading home.
Make sure you leave
some time for yourself.
You know one of our students has opened
a big, fancy coffee shop on M.G. Road?
- Hmm?
- Yes.
I am going to inaugurate it.
You should join me.
I'd really like that.
You should get your
mom to find you a wife
who can make tea,
or you'll be stuck going
to coffee shops your whole life.
Okay? Bye.
You know the old lady who
works at the coaching center?
She's getting a new
house through a scheme.
- Really?
- Check this out.
Public Housing Scheme.
That could solve
our housing problems.
So, should we give
up on finding a place
and deal with government
bureaucracy instead?
Maybe we should just rent for now.
How long do you plan on renting for?
Two or three years?
Do you think Uncle
and Aunty will ever leave?
What about our future children
when we decide to have them?
- What about them?
- What about them?
Where will they sleep? In the yard?
Somya, let's just drop
the idea of buying a house.
We already have a nice house.
Let's just add two
new rooms on the terrace.
We'll save on rent,
and stay with our family.
You're always thinking small.
Come on, Kapil!
I just want to leave this area
and get our kids
into a better school.
Yesterday you wanted
to buy a 5.5 million flat,
and today you want to
try for the government scheme.
One moment you are
talking about privacy,
and the next you're talking
about the future of our children.
We need some clarity before
we take such a big decision.
Will you go to the Public
Housing Office or should I?
It's a government scheme,
but we'll still need
to get a bank loan for it.
We'll also have
to grease many palms.
It comes with many
strings attached, Somya.
It's very tough these days.
You can't even look
at me in our own house.
Sajjan has been sleeping
with us for the past three months!
We have to go to a
lodge for some alone time.
That's our reality, Mr. Dubey.
Do you understand,
or should I continue?
I get it.
Put it on the table and leave.
Fine, I'll go there.
You should try doing
the Headstand Pose,
or your brain might explode someday.
Kapil, shall we go?
Yeah, let's head out.
You didn't finish the soda?
Do you have a permanent house?
Yes, sir, but it belongs to my dad.
And it's small.
It's tiny.
Size doesn't matter.
Public Housing Scheme is a government
thing that gets you in a permanent house,
but only if you fit their criteria.
Okay, and how do I check
off those criteria boxes?
You can't. Only the right
people are born into it.
Well, I was born
in the wrong category.
So, how do I go about it?
Stand up.
You can try again in your next life.
I'll be here, at your service.
But seriously, it's tiny...
Just follow my lead
and you'll get there.
- Fine.
- Give it here.
Here you go.
You have the number, right?
Hit me with a missed call.
Later, man.
Hey, dude!
You seem like you know
how to get stuff done.
Tell me about that
Public Housing Scheme.
What's wrong?
You weren't born
into the right category.
You guessed that right.
My dad had no idea
I'd need this someday.
I apologize on his behalf.
You are lucky.
You have come to the right guy.
The darkest night comes
before the brightest day.
Be here after sundown.
And no haggling.
Time to fly away.
Hit me with a missed call.
Come on, Kapu, why do you
never fill the tank all the way up?
Gasoline likes to evaporate.
Forget that, will our family
be cool with you coming with me?
I don't care. I don't give a damn.
Get it?
How do I thank you?
With cash, preferably.
You're a lifesaver.
It's nothing, ma'am.
Just pay the cash
and I'll handle the rest.
Hit me with a missed call.
Hey, dude!
Met you in the morning...
- Come on in. Come on in.
- Let's go.
Come on in.
You wait there.
I'll be with you in a minute.
- Come on in.
- Let's go.
Flat is ahead.
Your place is hard to find.
You got to work hard to
get where you want to be, man.
Come on in.
Be seated.
"Feel nice to meet me."
Bhagwandas Iswardas Sahai.
This is dope, buddy.
So you are an agent as well?
Don't insult me by
calling me an agent.
I'm here to do public service, 24/7.
I listen to people's
problems in the morning,
and come up with
solutions in the evening.
So, how can I help you?
I am Kapil Dubey.
This is my wife, Somya Dubey.
Somya Chawla Dubey.
Somya Chawla Dubey.
You dig it?
Good job.
Can we move on now
from the name game?
Hey man, break down that
Public Housing Scheme math for me.
You got to understand
the science behind it first.
There are two types
of people in this world.
The haves and the have-nots.
Those who have stuff
and those who don't.
So what do they not have?
Let's say a house, for example!
Who doesn't have a house?
Those who don't have the cash,
like laborers, wage earners, guards,
and rickshaw pullers,
cart pullers, and so on.
So the government comes through
with schemes for those people.
They get a cheap house in
a prime location that they can own.
It's so tempting that even
middle-class peeps go for it.
Ladies get first priority.
And most importantly, you
can't have your own permanent house.
We have one,
but it belongs to his dad.
It's small.
Small? It's tiny.
Are you sure it's made
not of mud or some organic crap?
Yeah, we're sure.
Then you don't have the eligibility.
But there's got
to be a way around it.
There are two options,
easy or tough.
First: Your dad disowns you.
That's not going to happen.
So, what's the easy way?
He wants Dad to disown me.
You disown your wife.
Wives have property rights,
so if she isn't your wife she won't
have a house, a shop, or anything
which makes her eligible.
Then the house is yours.
So Mr. Dubey and Mrs. Choli...
Sorry, Mrs. Chawla...
This is how you can take
advantage of this scheme.
What have you been smoking, man?
What are you saying?
- What is he suggesting, huh?
- Hold on, dude.
You have to divorce
but you do not have to split.
A piece of paper doesn't
end a relationship.
We go step by step
Get a legal divorce,
get a house,
then get married again.
Everything is back to normal.
It'll be like a deleted
folder in your life
and no one will be none the wiser.
- You're such a crazy!
- Kapil!
We came here looking for a house and
you want us to break our marriage?
I'm right.
If you want the house,
pony up and make the decision.
What's there to decide?
He calls himself a public servant!
Let's go, Somya.
We are done here. Let's go.
Write it down, kid.
Give me half portion of chili chicken.
Half a portion of Manchurian, too.
a full portion but split in half.
What will you add to the
one-half portion of the noodles?
A soda, spilt into two.
- Hurry it up.
- Hold on.
I'll have a separate soda.
Hey, wait, just get one.
I got gas.
Now scram.
You know why I liked
you before marriage?
You weren't like those
other no-good guys.
You were realistic.
You knew how to be happy,
and how to keep others
happy without spending too much.
You didn't ask too much from life.
You always knew where to draw the line.
And the best thing about you -
you didn't change after we got married.
You never forget to bring me a
5-star chocolate every day since we met.
That was an incredible day.
11th June, Wednesday.
You were wearing a beautiful
white dress with flowers on it.
And those Jaipuri sandals!
You looked amazing.
What was that you had
said while sipping on soda?
"Hey Kapil,
give me a lesson on saving money!"
I had no clue in the beginning,
but by the end of the day,
I knew I got a girl impressed.
Oh, Kapu...
Oh, Somya...
Let's hurry up with
our food order, okay?
- Check that out.
- What?
Idli Fry - 80
Mysore Masala Dosa - 90
Paneer Uttappam - 120
He's got to be making
200K-300K a month.
Looking a little higher won't
make the clouds burst, you know?
Kapil, you never see
what you're supposed to.
Higher? Where?
That bird's nest?
I'll get it removed.
- Yo kid!
- Kapil!
That's someone's home.
Somya, please don't play
the emotional card on me.
We finally got a chance
to get out of the house.
Look, thing happens
when they're supposed to happen.
So wake up, it's time!
Time to do what?
Get a divorce.
You go, we'll figure this out.
I already talked to Manoj.
It'll be done in ten days.
What do you want, Somya?
A house we can call our own.
Our home!
So we should get
a divorce just for that?
63% of women in this country
don't own a house of their own,
but you don't care.
Nevermind about me,
our family will flip if we tell them.
- Do we have to tell them?
- Divorce...
Do we have to get a divorce?
Come on, Kapil!
It's not like we're breaking up.
It's just a paper.
Why the...
Why the hell are you so
afraid to divorce me on paper?
You're crazy, Somya.
You never think big!
Somya, at least eat the noodles.
I asked him to add chicken just for you.
I hate street noodles.
It messes with my stomach.
Did I ever tell you that?
Come on, girl! Somya...
Yo, kid! Come here.
- Pack up the vegetarian stuff.
- Alright.
Hey, bro, you left a buck last time.
That's your tip. Enjoy.
No, bro, I don't need it.
You take it.
- You sure?
- Yeah, man, positive.
Get the parcel and meet me near my bike.
Now where did shego?
You, your mom, your whole family,
you all are cheap as hell!
Total scrooges!
You probably got lice
crawling all over you!
- There he is!
- Good for nothing bum! Move.
Yeah, I'm cheap, but at least
I'm not a conniving cheater like you!
She's got her ex's name tattooed
on her heart right here.
Sunny, you're my bunny!
he isn't an ex, he's a double ex.
If the double ex didn't have
a problem with the "Sunny's Bunny",
why's he so jealous?
Kapu, what's happening here?
I think they sell clothes.
That's enough, now don't
go on telling me how much they make.
Sister, please.
Go away!
Buzz off!
Beat it!
What are you doing?
Brother Manoj, what was that all about?
It's an everyday thing for us.
People these days just
need a small excuse to part ways.
I don't feel good today.
You don't feel good?
Sit down, I'll get you some water.
- No... - Yes, please.
- Sit down, bro.
Who in their right mind would feel
good after hearing that crap all day?
Hey, I'm not feeling too
good about your divorce thing.
What can I say, bro?
It took a lot of convincing
to get me on board.
I'm happy as it makes Somya happy.
So just help us get
this over with cordially.
You can do that, can't you?
You can do that, right?
Don't worry.
Your friend here is the
best divorce lawyer in town.
Which friend?
I am talking about myself!
"Oh, my love, for you alone,"
"I'd trade the world,
without a moan."
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"No need for help, no blessings to call"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"Listen up, girl,"
"My true love,"
"Forever and now
I'll always want you, I vow"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"No need for help, no blessings to call"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"You're the one, You're the one,"
"My love, You're the one,"
"You're mine and I'm yours."
"My sun rises"
"When you wake up."
"My sun doesn't rise without you"
"Dreams are pale, for you are the truth"
"Listen up, girl,"
"My true love,"
"My wounds need no treatment,
your touch cures it all"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"No need for help, no blessings to call"
"With you by my side, I have it all"
"You are the one for me,"
"You are the one for me,"
"You are the one for me,"
"My love, you are the one for me,"
"You are the one for me,"
"Without you, my love,"
"I don't want this world either."
Take it easy, girl.
Don't jump over my legs,
I won't get any taller.
How much taller you want to be, huh?
Be careful.
Puru, what's wrong with Deepa?
Nothing, Sister.
- We went to the Kahjrana Ganesh Temple.
- Okay.
- You know it's a steep climb.
- Yeah.
So she's out of breath.
- You good?
- Yeah.
What are you looking at?
Give it here.
You never do your homework!
Can't read a damn thing.
- You good?
- Hmm.
What's wrong?
Your blood sugar
levels dropped suddenly?
He used to do that, stand
like a statue even when he was a kid.
Sister... these are divorce papers.
- God bless you, dear.
- Pandit, really? Have you lost your mind?
I was just 15 when I married you.
You want to divorce me at this age?
You should've divorced me
while I was still young enough!
He isn't lucky enough to
find another wife at this age.
These divorce papers
are Kapil's and Somya's.
Come here, Brother-in-law.
- Kapu...
- Hmm?
You're losing hair.
Easy there, girl.
I don't want to go bald.
- Kapil...
- Hmm?
Why are they staring at us?
What kind of a joke is this, son?
Speak up!
What are they going to say,
Their silence speaks volumes!
Look at them!
You done with breakfast?
It's all because of these
unlucky friends of his.
He made them get divorced.
Coming, Mom!
He always runs to her
when hits the fan.
You two are smart. What's the deal?
I'm sure this Punjabi girl is to blame.
She wears backless blouses
and saris' below the navel.
She dresses up like that and goes out.
Their marriage was bound to break.
I haven't even seen my grandson yet!
Me neither.
Daughter-in-law, say that it's a lie.
It's true, Mom.
And it isn't your fault.
It's between us.
I don't want to stay with him anymore.
He's made my life a living hell!
He's always thinking in one direction!
What a crazy!
Forget that,
Somya tell me, how'd it get this bad?
Wait, Uncle.
You are no movie star either!
I just pity you sometimes
and take care of your needs.
Hey! All I got to do
is let my hair down in the market
and men like you come crawling!
I'm sick of pretending!
It's do or die now.
But what is the issue, though?
Ask him, go on and ask him.
He goes out with girls
under the guise of teaching yoga.
He's always lying.
Like you always tell the truth!
His Chi is messed up!
Chi? What's that?
Uncle, Chi is an energy vibration.
When we do Bellows Breaths in yoga...
He's jealous because
I make more than him!
It bruised his ego for good.
Hear that!
She's talking ego!
First, learn to
appreciate what you have.
You're taunting me about money?
It's not like
she's making millions, Aunty.
I've got a regular income. I'm stable.
This man is jealous!
Good thing you all found out.
We don't have to pretend anymore!
She's getting uppity
because of an incentive!
I told her to tell everyone
so we could bury this.
But she refused!
"Kapu, let's keep it under wraps."
Tell me, can anyone keep
something like this a secret?
He's a idiot!
He only gets one soda at a time!
He smells and snores like hell!
Do you even know how
to tie your own pajamas?
Watch your tongue or else...
I'll do something bad!
I'm waiting for the court date.
I've had it!
This was bound to happen.
They won't be getting
the 5-star chocolate anymore?
Their stars are misaligned and you're
worried about the 5-star chocolate?
Son, even though marriages
are made in heaven,
it's our job to stay committed to them.
Mistakes happen,
but that doesn't mean you get divorced.
I was 12 years younger than
your father when I married him.
I used to look like Meryl Streep.
Whenever we used to step
outside the house together,
people thought I was his daughter.
But I stayed with him, didn't I?
So, what is the issue here?
Tell me the truth,
are you having an affair?
Is she?
Come on, Mom!
No one's having an affair!
Do you really think
Somya's that kind of girl?
What I think doesn't matter, son.
Come on, Mom!
Dang girl, you can act!
I was the best actress
in my class.
Why were you being extra though?
Well, I'm not used
to being melodramatic.
So I'm melodramatic?
If we keep this up,
I might become one too.
Mr. Melodramatic!
You wanted to hit me, huh?
You can't hit the one you love.
That's it.
Keep up with these
melodramatic dialogues.
I'm giving you an ultimatum!
Touch me one more time
and I'm calling the cops!
Oh, my God!
What's wrong with our kids?
Did you talk to them?
Talking isn't going to do any good.
Somya does what she wants,
once she's made up her mind.
She's got strong willpower.
Don't get me wrong, Kapil's strong too.
Yoga has made him flexible as rubber.
- What?
- I'm just giving her the facts.
I've thought it over.
Despite everything,
their horoscopes say
they should have a happy marriage.
Happy marriage?!
You said the same thing for me!
There have been fights
since the day I moved in.
First, it was your mom,
now it's your son and his wife.
We took out a loan to get her
married and now she's getting divorced!
Why are you airing our dirty laundry?
Sister, marriages done by
taking a loan don't usually last.
That's why!
What does she mean!
- Mom!
- Somu!
Oh Somu, Somu, Somu!
Come here, my baby.
It's okay, my baby.
It's alright, come sit down. Sit.
- Oh, Somu!
- Wait, let me love on her for a bit.
- You wait.
- Wait.
Oh, my poor baby!
Your father-in-law told me on the phone.
I was taken aback.
Your mom's been looking at
the wedding album on the way here.
It's got my pictures too, right?
I was wearing a Chandheri Zari Sari.
- Remember?
- Oh yeah!
They got torn!
Why are you causing her distress?
This is a "girly" matter.
She won't tell you about it.
I always had a doubt.
Keep your doubt to yourself.
What doubts did you have, huh?
- No, no, no!
- No, no, no!
No, my child!
No, no, no! Your daddy's here.
Don't cry. Don't cry.
I'll talk to Kapil, alright?
She's so tough.
Yeah, sure.
Don't! You'll untie it.
Not in front of everyone.
This is messed up.
Really messed up.
Screw Dad!
Dad! Dad!
What Dad? What Dad, huh?
Tell me straight up.
Is there a girl involved in this mess?
No, Dad.
Oh, I get it.
The entire situation has changed.
Do you have a thing for a guy?
What are you talking about, Dad?
I'm not like that!
I know. "I'm not like that!"
One smack and all your
chakras will align in no time.
He's making excuses!
Why won't you believe me?
I... I...
I swear to God, I'm not like that.
Then what's the issue?
What's the problem?
Listen to me.
I was young once too.
With a black beard and the works.
I was young. I know it.
A person tends to get
bored with the same stuff.
So they start looking for something new,
here and there.
I know.
I'm a man too, I know it.
How do I explain our situation?
Your daughter... the house...
She'll learn to run the house, Kapil.
She's just a kid.
She's just a kid, she'll figure it out.
No one learns this stuff in the womb.
she'll figure it out.
You're not listening to me.
No, you listen to me.
Hand me the snacks first.
It's your life.
You have to decide.
Whether you want
to sink in a glass or...
Where's it's mom, huh?
The bottle!
Whether you want to
sink in a glass or a bottle?
You have to decide.
Son, it's hard to fix
a broken kite's string.
I've flown a bunch of kites in my time.
I had a special kite.
One night,
I kept pulling the string...
Dad! You've had too much to drink!
You've had too many. You're...
Sorry, sorry.
Pour me another drink.
Roshni only lets me have three drinks.
You've had eight drinks, Dad.
Let's start over then.
This time,
tell me when I have my third drink.
What's the big deal?
Keep it coming, keep it coming...
Stop, stop, stop!
These two people...
Somya Chawla Dubey and Kapil Dubey...
They want to get a divorce!
Go and spit that out first.
This is a courtroom and not your home
that you can chew tobacco
as and when you please.
Made me spit the whole thing!
Where is your lawyer?
Did you spit it out?
In the corner, I presume?
Yes, just around the corner.
Slap him with a fine.
But Milord, what I was saying...
You will keep quiet.
Okay, I take silence.
What is the problem?
Why don't you two want to stay together?
Have a kid, travel the world.
You're too young to be
dragging this out in court.
What is going on, Milord!
Why are we talking about babies now?
I told you to...
What is the issue?
Sir, this man is a liar!
He didn't keep any of his
pre-marriage promises to me.
I know he's online, but he won't
respond to my WhatsApp messages.
Everyone in India would get
divorced if this were the norm.
Even me!
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Now we're on the right track.
Yes, sir!
Sir, I don't want to
have a kid with this cheater.
- Never!
- No way!
- Not happening!
- Not in a million years!
Your Honour... sir, I teach yoga.
She's accusing me for no reason.
She's got arrogant because
she has started making more than me.
I can only take so much.
She's climbing higher
than a rocket ship!
Very high!
Even higher than inflation!
Son, every divorce has
some ego and blame thrown in.
Come on now...
You two tied the knot
because you were in love, yeah?
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
11th June, Wednesday.
She was wearing a beautiful
white dress with flowers on it.
And those Jaipuri sandals!
What is going on, Milord?
- What the hell is going on!
- Councilor!
Will anyone listen to me in here?
did you check out their faces?
They came here to divorce, but they're
sitting super close to each other.
The wife gave her man her
hanky to wipe off his sweat.
And when I yelled at her,
he held her hand to soothe her.
I mean, there's still
some hope for them.
- But Milord...
- So, I'm giving
them a six-month cooling-off period.
That's it.
Brother Manoj...
Brother Manoj...
Don't even get me started,
Is this some kind of
make-out spot or something?
And you...
what's with the red-yellow-
black-green-blue dress talk?
You guys came here to get divorced,
not make out.
You were even holding
hands in the courtroom!
Manoj, six months is way too long.
It'll be tough to handle
everyone in the house.
Our house will turn into a battlefield.
Should we go meet Bhagwan (God)?
I'm barely okay with you getting divorced,
don't even think about suicide!
- Manoj...
- Nope!
Did you just get your law degree online?
Or did you steal somebody else's
and slap your name on it?
He's pushing it too far, Kapil.
What'd you do in the courtroom, huh?
Stop driving me crazy, you guys!
The first step is to fix
the Chi energy of this place.
My Chi energy is all messed up,
how am I supposed to fix this?
- What needs fixing, huh?
- Hey!
Chi, it's a vibration energy thing.
It's related to yoga.
- Sit down.
- Okay, okay.
We need to pick a direction.
Going around in circles
isn't going to cut it.
Ma'am, we're trying to
turn one circle into a square,
that is, get you a house.
We got a big goal to reach,
so we need big players.
Care to explain?
Or do we need to hire
somebody else to decode it?
I am already easy,
you need to portray him as easy.
Question his character.
Prove he's a pervert.
- Hey!
- There's another option.
Prove that he's medically unfit.
No, no, no.
Come on dude, don't screw me over.
You'll thank me when you're snoring
in your new air-conditioned room.
You know the dough's got to
be pressed hard to make crispy wafers.
Will this speed up the divorce process?
Faster than fast.
What do we need to do?
What do you need to do?
You need to do something
that he stinks of another woman.
Catch him naked...
red-handed at a make-out spot,
then toss the pictures
on the judge's desk.
You'll see this matter
will be over in minutes.
What if that doesn't work, though?
I may cheat, but I'm not a cheater.
I'll sell my shop if your
appeal gets denied, swear to God!
Stay away from plants.
What are you going to
get from these plants anyway?
Come on, let me take
you to a garden or something.
Do you have any other ideas
besides these off-the-wall plans?
I can do a lot,
just need someone to ask me.
Forget it, bro.
Kapil's going to take me out.
"Kapil will take me out."
He doesn't have time to spare.
He already has his hands full.
Look at me, I'm a free bird.
Manoj! Manoj!
Go and get the gas cylinder.
Fly away, free bird.
Hurry up... stop dillydallying.
Come on, Dad.
Can't you just be quiet for two seconds?
Go and get the gas cylinder, he says.
Be careful with that.
Who's in such a hurry?
Can't a guy take a shower in peace?
It's me, Kapu. Open the door, quick.
What's up?
Just open the door.
What happened? What are you doing?
We can't get divorced
if anyone sees us like this.
What'd she do?
You're going to have an affair with her.
You want to ruin the
Dubey family's reputation
so they can't show their
faces around town, don't you?
It'll be a secret affair.
We won't be putting out posters of it.
Don't cut so close, one mistake and
your palace will come crumbling down.
I just need one photo, Kapu.
Then she goes to her place
and you go to yours.
This is the house
I always wanted to live in.
Please, Kapu... please.
What? It's been so long!
- Someone might see us together.
- No one will. I don't care anyway.
Leave me alone!
I'm not a blanket you can use
and toss aside whenever you want.
At least you thought of me.
I don't know what to do or say.
Kapil, you know,
I've always seen you as a strong guy.
All we can see are their backs.
Calm down.
Seeing you sad like
this is really weird.
Turn around, turn around.
Turn around, turn around.
The Chi energy in this place is bad.
It's better over here.
Turn around.
- Yes.
- Right?
It's good.
Take the pic.
You know I... I just feel
so suffocated inside sometimes.
I can't get any decent pics.
I can't talk to anyone
about my feelings.
- Give it here.
- Hmm.
You can talk to me.
You don't need to
feel shy to talk to me.
This is the first time in years
you've brought me to Megdhoot Garden.
This day will always...
It'll always be special for me.
What's so special about it?
We're getting the divorce,
we're getting the house!
Good morning, ma'am.
What are you doing here?
Same thing you're doing.
Should I show you what we're doing?
Should I?
Get out of here!
Give me my shoe back before you leave!
Give it back!
Secret affair!
This man's the king of cheating,
lying, and drama!
Milord, you should
just end this matter now
before they start beating each other up.
Stop with the theatrics!
Come to the point.
Look at the photos in
the file in front of you.
We caught him in the act!
How can my client Somya Chawla stay
with a man like this?
How can any woman put up with cheating?
Just stamp the file and close the case.
Kapil, is this true?
Sir, a thief's never going
to admit they stole something.
Kapil Dubey, do you have
anything to say for yourself?
What? How can he possibly defend this?
That's how the system works, Milord!
Men have been treating women
horribly for thousands of years.
They can do whatever they
want and nothing happens to them.
Women, on the other hand,
even one little doubt
and they're forced
to prove their innocence!
The truth doesn't discriminate, Milord.
I want justice!
Easy, Bhagel. You'll blow up.
Make a note of it.
Considering the evidence against Kapil,
the testimony from his wife,
and Kapil's refusal to speak,
the court...
grants their divorce.
Yes, yes, yes!
- Did you grab all the bags?
- Yes, got them all.
- Her jewelry?
- Got that too!
We went against the society
and got him married to a Punjabi!
Just because our boy insisted.
You didn't check their horoscopes
before setting up the match?
I have lost faith in horoscopes now.
I am so confused.
Kapil, you're welcome to swing
by for a couple of drinks anytime.
- What are you saying?
- Shut up.
Pundits live here.
Calm down.
Sorry, Mom.
It's okay, it's okay.
Oh, Dad!
Get in the car already!
Come on!
I feel suffocated here.
Let's go.
I feel suffocated here.
This is too much.
Let's go.
- Come on kid, say goodbye to her.
- Leave me.
- Move it. Move it, move it.
- Bye.
Get in.
Mom, she just winked at brother!
- Stop! Stop! Stop!
- Hit the brakes! Hit the brakes!
- What?
- What is it?
You coming from Gwalior?
Nope, Pardesi Pura.
The car is registered in Gwalior though.
Any problem?
Driving a Gwalior registered
car in Indore, huh?
Did you steal it or what?
Where're your manners?
Who do you think you are?
I am Daroga (cop).
The in-charge of this place.
License and registration, please.
Yeah, sure thing. Got them right here.
What are you doing?
Getting the wallet out!
What're you doing she says!
Here's my license.
Harcharan Chawla.
Any problem?
Do you have your ID card on you?
ID card?
Since when do we need
an ID Card to drive a car?
Since today.
I didn't see that in the news.
It's breaking news, sir.
Just give it to him.
- He's being a bit much now.
- It's okay. Give it to him.
- Here.
- Here you go.
Harcharan Chawla.
Did you make this card today?
You're wearing the same turban.
Yes, I'm wearing the same turban.
Is it linked to your PAN card?
No, it's not!
Do what you want to!
Calm down, calm down, calm down.
- This is getting ridiculous!
- Calm down.
Listen, I am Somya Chawla Dubey.
Chawla Dubey?
- Two last names, huh?
- Yes.
What does your husband do for a living?
- He's a yoga teacher.
- She's divorced.
Why did they split up?
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Watch it!
Which police station
are you reporting to, huh?
They don't ask these many
questions even at the airport!
I'm not a cop, I'm Daroga.
My name is Daroga Raghuvanshi.
I'm the head of security around here.
There you go!
Listen, we just rented D-304.
Don't bother answering him,
he's just a rent-a-cop.
Buzz off.
And give me my papers back.
Take it easy, sir.
Slow down.
Slow down, hubby.
These snacks are from
the Prakash Namkeen Store. Try some.
It's delicious.
All the paperwork is good to go.
May I say something?
Only the lucky ones get the Lord
and Milord's seal of approval.
Now, there's just one thing left to do.
Slap down 400K on the table
and watch your car take
off to heaven with this pilot.
What have you been smoking, man?
400K cash?
If I had that kind of money,
I'd book a bungalow on Yashwant Road
and not be running circles with you.
You're getting too worked up too fast.
I don't smoke crap and
I don't put up with any nonsense.
Don't try to be slick with me.
I'm not trying to be slick,
just stating the facts.
- Then state them.
- Alright,
the fact is that location matters
when it comes to flats, right?
It sure does.
And you're getting one worth
4.5 million for just 2.4 million,
so you got to grease some palms,
don't you?
The government officer asked for 500K.
I told him you were desperate
and like family to me,
- so he settled for 400K.
- Family?
But we don't have 400K in cash.
Why not take some now
and we'll figure out the rest later?
How are we supposed to come
up with the rest of the money?
We can't just give
him whatever he asks for!
You should have told us sooner!
We could have planned better.
Let me tell you a little story.
When the Reaper came for my soul,
I told him to wait until I was done
so we could go together, full and final.
I don't like to live in installments.
Listen, we got divorced
because you asked us to!
Why did you have to start
this nonsense now?
Let's go, Somya.
- Hold on, let's hear him out, Kapil.
- I've heard enough.
He's cooking up new stories every day.
Let's go.
You're calling me?
He knows me.
So, this is to trick him.
They didn't have bigger teeth available?
They did, but they cost too much.
Don't worry about it.
I've got everything set up.
Let's go.
- Come with me.
- Let's go.
"Be careful..."
"Be careful..."
"Be careful..."
"Be careful..."
Is the application
going to be in your name?
It's a lottery system.
I'm sure you must
have read the whole form.
We know it's a lottery system.
But ultimately,
it's in your hands, right?
Who is he?
My brother.
So, what were you saying, Mr. Brother?
What's in my hands?
Sir, I was just wondering
if we could make a deal or something?
You're trying to grease my palms!
You're bribing me!
It is because of brothers like
you that sisters are in this condition.
You have got our society so messed up!
Ultimately, all the responsibility
falls on government officials like me.
Tell him your contact's name.
Ramakant Chaurasia
told me to come see you.
The one who runs the
Chaurasia Paan Bhandaar?
Get this straight!
If I report you to my higher-ups,
you'll never be able to apply again.
He's shamelessly trying
to bribe a government official.
Don't let him raise
your blood pressure, sir.
You enjoy your tea, I'll handle him.
Let's "fly away".
Follow me.
"Be careful..."
Your contact is just a street vendor?
Enjoy your tea, old man.
Don't take government
officials lightly, bro.
You got divorced over this
and now you're playing dress-up?
There are tons of watchdogs around here
who can smell a fake from a mile away!
You'll get arrested for fraud!
You'll be chomping on prison
bars with those teeth of yours.
"If I go down, I'm taking you with me."
You wouldn't lower your price,
so I had to do something.
He thinks he is Phantom!
Tell me what I need to do, Mr. Bhagwan.
I'll do what needs
to be done from my end.
Did you bring the demand draft with you?
Mr. Dubey, feel free to chow down
on the snacks while we handle this.
Go for it!
You come with me.
Here you go.
We already got the slip.
- Take care of it.
- Sure thing.
- Thank you.
- Let's go.
So, we have submitted the form.
Listen, now you have
to cough up 400K
and your name will
get picked in the lottery.
- Okay.
- Let's go.
One more thing, maintain "social distance"
from your "brother" until then.
- Understood?
- Yes.
This way, please.
Thank you.
Where's this address at?
This one.
Go straight and take a left...
Let Bhagwan do his thing,
don't go trying to find another contact.
We still need to get the cash together.
- What's he doing here?
- Stop.
Don't say a word.
Who is this guy, sis?
My brother.
You didn't mention him before.
Are you a lawyer or something?
Do we have to submit an affidavit
with every detail in it?
I am the security head here.
What's your brother's name?
- Sunny Chawla!
- No,
it's Sunny Dubey Chawla.
Sunny Dubey Chawla
Do you have your ID card on you?
I have a passport
and Ration card too.
You want to see it?
Look, the thing is...
Look at what? Just write down my name.
Dad! Dad! Mom's calling you, let's go!
I have his details.
Let me know next time he comes around.
I will.
You have a very demanding mom, huh?
Let's go.
That dude's a little nuts.
He's just a security guard.
Yeah, he's kind of crazy.
Kapil, we'll have to stay on our toes.
Screw that!
You know how I feel?
Remember when we first
started seeing each other?
We used to sneak off to Chappan...
to grab a bite.
And I used to drop
you back at the hostel?
Whenever you walked in that gate,
I'd stand outside and watch you leave.
My heart used to be racing.
You know why?
Because I always wondered
when I'd see you again.
My heart's racing like that again today.
I'm wondering when I'll see you next.
Somebody's caught the love bug,
am I right?
Making fun of me, huh?
One day, you're going
to be yearning for me too.
You crazy girl!
Over here.
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of stars along too,"
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of stars along too,"
"Request the stars
and moon to wait a while,"
"Request the stars
and moon to wait a while,"
"Until I've swept my girl
off her feet with style,"
"Until I've swept my girl
off her feet with style,"
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of stars along too,"
"If the truth be told,"
"Being with you in this
lifetime makes it complete,"
"your face is like the moon,
shining bright,"
"Your eyes twinkle like stars at night,"
"There is no reason
for me to seek the sky,"
"There is no reason
for me to seek the sky,"
"If you still yearn,
I'll gladly comply,"
"Your every desire, I will supply,"
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of stars along too,"
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of stars along too,"
"A troublemaker mister, you'll see,"
"So be cautious lest
you fall victim to me!"
"A troublemaker mister, you'll see,"
"So be cautious lest
you fall victim to me!"
First, we have to get
our Chi energy aligned.
Chi... aka vibration, energy.
Everything depends on this.
Yoga is nothing
but an exercise without it.
Just like Poha without onions.
Today, we'll learn how to balance
our bodies,
and thoughts.
- By doing the Tree Pose.
- Correct.
So lift your right leg,
and place it on your left thigh.
Now slowly raise your
hands and take a deep breath.
Very good.
What are you doing here?
Taking a deep breath with you.
Stop this drama.
You stop it.
I know why you divorced Somya.
What... what do you know?
The same thing you're too scared to say.
Did Manoj tell you?
Does Manoj know?
He knows everything.
No one else knows.
Okay, so you can tell Manoj but not me?
How could I have told you?
You are such a duh.
We both like each other,
and everyone knows that except us.
- Yo Kapil,
- Yes, Gopi.
are we supposed to meditate or what?
No, relax. Relax.
Brother! Brother!
You're getting a call from Gopi!
Gopi is calling you, Brother!
It's Gopi calling you.
Gopi is calling you, Brother.
Hold on, don't answer it.
I'm coming, I'm coming.
You take forever to answer my calls.
You got another girl
in your life or what?
I was taking a shower.
He got a call from Gopi.
Something is fishy.
Listen, I have good news.
Did Bhagwan call you?
Mom's leaving for Gwalior tonight.
Can you come over this evening?
That's awesome, love!
If I ever say no to that,
you can stab me!
- I told you! She is the one.
- Kapu...
Are you coming or not?
Get ready to do the nasty!
What does "do the nasty" mean?
Shut up!
He's coming this way, let's go.
Why is this thing here?
I can't hear anything.
he's getting ready to meet Gopi.
Don't worry about it.
Gopi is a guy's name.
That's what we're worried about.
You know how guys are,
they've lost their sense of direction!
Guys have lost their
sense of direction, my foot!
Gopi can be a girl's name too.
Remember, my aunt's sister-in-law's
daughter's name is Gopi.
Either he's confused
or he has us confused.
"You are my Coca-Cola!"
"You are my love!"
Whoa! Stop, stop, stop!
Where to?
To... to my sister's place.
Somya Chawla Dubey.
Which one of her brothers are you?
What do you mean?
She has another brother
who keeps coming over.
Something is fishy.
That was me!
I mean that's me!
I was wearing glasses
and had one bucktooth.
Two big buckteeth!
You had two buckteeth.
I took them off.
But I don't see any missing.
These are real, those were fake.
Dude, I work in the theater.
That day I came here straight from
the show, so I was still in the getup.
Oh, so you're a drama guy!
It runs in the family.
I can see that.
You're early for once.
Oh, Mrs. Chawla Dubey!
- You know what?
- What?
- If I stay away from you for long then...
- Then?
Then my whole body
starts hyperventilating.
- Show me.
- Show you what?
Show me how.
I miss you, Somya.
I can't stop thinking about you.
How's everyone at home?
They're good.
They think I'm having an affair.
With a stubborn girl.
Oh really?
She teaches at a coaching center.
Tell me Mr. Dubey,
then why are you secretly meeting your
when you have this stubborn girl?
I feel like I'm back at the lodge.
It's so weird to stay alone, Kapu.
There's no one to mess things up.
Things stay the way I leave them.
There's no dirty laundry on the floor
or used teacups on the table.
The towel never leaves the bathroom.
And don't even ask
how much miss our 5-star chocolates!
- Hmm?
- Hmm.
Man, it's freezing in here!
The water heater is busted.
Why didn't you tell me earlier?
Was the water too cold?
Way too cold.
Really cold.
Really cold.
I'll get late.
I'm going to be late
for the coaching center.
- Come on, girl.
- Let me go.
I'm here from the Public Housing
Scheme office... for verification?
Sure thing. Come on in.
Take a seat.
Somya Chawla Dubey?
Yeah, she lives here.
She's in the shower right now.
- And you are...?
- I'm her...
Just fixing the hot water issue.
How many bathrooms are in this place?
Just one. It's a rental.
Hey, Somya!
A Public Housing Scheme officer
is here for you.
Hurry up! I have to rush.
Somya Chawla Dubey.
Hey! Hi!
You're quite open-minded.
Excuse me?
Abhinav Gupta.
I'm here for verification.
Carry on then.
So, how long has
it been since your divorce?
Around 40 days.
And you applied
for the scheme pretty quickly.
Excuse me?
Just that there's a lot
of fraud going around these days.
Right, right.
I just have to make
sure everything checks out.
Your security guard downstairs
said you live here with your mom?
She went to Gwalior this morning,
but she'll be back soon.
Ask your brother Sunny
to move his motorcycle.
And your dad mentioned
that the water heater's busted.
- I can fix it in a jiffy.
- No!
No need!
I already had cold showers.
It was nice.
You're crazy or what?
I take showers early.
I can fix it in a jiffy.
No need!
I'm done.
You'll catch a cold, sis.
No, I won't.
Your brother stays here with you?
- Sunny!
- Sunny!
He's not here right now.
He went out for a job
interview this morning.
He'll be back soon.
Didn't he work with a theater group?
A theater group?
The coil's fried, ma'am.
You need a new one.
Coil got burnt?
Wait a minute... You look familiar.
I'm the plumber for this area.
You might have seen me around.
Really? Because I usually handle
all the plumbing jobs around here.
- You do?
- Where did he come from?
Then I'm going to file a complaint
with the Indore Plumbing Association.
Let me go.
- When did that happen?
- It's brand new, man.
But I didn't see you come in.
That's not my problem.
You can see me leave.
Hey listen,
did you fix Mr. Sharma's faucet?
- It's leaking again.
- Should I check the water heater?
Nah, just check the paperwork.
Check the paperwork.
This is up to the kids.
We should wait for Kapil to arrive.
Ah, there he is.
What's going on here, huh?
You've only been divorced for 40 days
and already have marriage
offers coming in?
Son, have some respect for us.
What's happening here?
The same thing you're too scared to say.
No, I think there's been some confusion.
You turned down Rashid for this guy?
She turned him down!
Pandit ji, we've respected you.
We trusted you,
and this is how you repay us?
Mr. Khan, give us some time to think.
Let us talk to Kapil.
Mehjabeen is like a daughter to us.
She's grown up here.
I don't know what is going on.
What you are doing is what is going on.
Choose a direction.
Gopi or Gopinath.
Brother-in-law, we'll soon
have Namaz done at a priest's house.
What did Shri Krishna tell
Arjun during the war for righteousness?
Listen, dude,
my wife is staying in a rental.
I have marriage proposals coming in,
and my uncle and aunt
are adding fuel to the fire.
We've already sold our
kidneys and given you 400K.
So spare me the lecture.
We have a lot of
complications in our lives.
The milk is about to boil over,
so when will we get the allotment?
Yeah, tell us that.
Can I tell you a secret?
The allotment list
comes out on the 16th.
Your name will be on the
list and the house will be yours.
Please be patient
for a couple more days.
On the 16th.
- This month?
- Yep.
I swear, on the 16th... of this month.
I swear to God.
- God bless you.
- God helps those who help themselves.
All I need is your blessings.
Oh, Kapu!
- Kapu...
- Hmm?
Thank you.
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
How about a hug, man?
Come here, Brother Manoj!
Oh, Brother Manoj!
- Cheers!
- Cheers!
Cheers! Cheers! Cheers!
Hey, Mr. Daroga!
Is this your family?
Yes, Ms. Somya,
My wife Rashmi,
and my daughter, Sushma.
- Sushma.
- Hi.
What grade are you in?
6th grade.
Do you study hard?
Of course,
how else will I become an engineer?
That's great!
Here, have a piece of cake.
No, thanks, sis.
Let her have it.
Daroga... join us.
Let's have a drink.
We just bought a new house.
Having your own house
is everyone's dream.
When I came to Indore,
I also wanted my own house,
but the high cost
of living makes it hard.
So, we have to scrape by
and live under the open sky.
You live out here?
Yes, bro.
I work as a security guard here,
and my wife works as a housekeeper.
It helps save some money.
But... life in the city is too fast.
Look at the two of you,
brother and sister drinking together.
This is great.
I'll get going, sis.
She's scared I might
have a drink or two.
She knows my limits.
Brother and sister?
When did she become your sister?
So make Mehjabeen your sister too.
No, why?
What are you looking at?
Our dreams coming true.
Look over there.
That's our home!
No, it's not!
Our home is in Kanchan Bhaag.
That's Satya Sai Chouraha.
Stay realistic, Somya.
- I don't want to.
- You don't?
- Nope.
- You don't?
I swear on Goddess Narmada,
looking at you two makes
me want to get married,
get divorced, and play this game too.
- Brother Manoj!
- Brother Manoj!
You should stick to playing
the law and order game.
What's this noise about?
Let's go.
- What's going on with this crowd?
- I have no clue.
Ask them.
Did they post the list?
No, they haven't.
They didn't post the list at all?
What does that even mean?
- Let's go find out.
- Yeah, let's go.
Police! Police!
Move out of the way so she can pass!
- Step back!
- She's a cop!
- Make room! Move!
- Police! Police!
We're cops too! Let us in.
- You can't go in there.
- Why not?
I'm a lawyer.
I'll sue you if you don't let us pass.
Get out of my way!
Don't worry. Let's go and find out.
Come back in a couple of days
and I'll give you an update.
Hey, buddy,
why didn't they post the list outside?
I don't know.
How do you not know?
Call Bhagwan Das.
Bhagwan Das is on leave.
- Come back later to inquire.
- But...
Come with me.
Let's see what we can do.
What's going to happen, Brother Manoj?
Don't worry, we'll figure something out.
Come with me.
Bhagwan Das said
it'll be out on the 16th.
Why didn't they post the list?
Call Kapil.
I'm trying.
What flat number have we been allotted?
Floor? Floor?
Which floor did we get?
They didn't post any list.
No one knows anything.
Bhagwan's on leave.
Calm down. Calm down, everyone.
Listen to me very carefully.
The houses that were to be allotted
through the lottery system
under the Public Housing Scheme,
its allotment has
been delayed indefinitely
due to special circumstances.
We don't know when
the list will come out.
What did I do?
You could've at least
come on time today.
Stop talking nonsense!
My being late didn't stop
them from posting the list.
Let's go talk to Bhagwan.
See what he's been up to.
- Let's go.
- Come on.
Don't spare him.
Thrash him.
Beat him.
I think he's the cause of the delay.
Happy now?
Don't bug me, Kapil.
My wish..
Breaking news from Indore.
The allotment under
the Public Housing Scheme
in Indore has been postponed,
causing trouble for the applicants.
The officials haven't given a statement
and the government
has not cleared its stance.
This delay is just a cover-up.
Everyone from the minister
to the peon wants a piece.
You reap what you sow.
I can't believe people fall
for these schemes. Are they stupid?
You've been coughing all morning!
How many times have I
told you to lay off fried food?
But you never listen to me!
Kapu, why aren't
you picking up my calls?
I'm scared. Like, literally shaking.
We got divorced because of this scheme
and we even invested
400K into it, Somya.
How much longer are
they going to delay this?
Are we supposed to live
apart like this forever?
I'm at my wit's end, Kapil.
I think we should just tell
our family the truth.
Have you lost your mind?
We already have enough going on.
We don't need more drama!
But Kapil, they might be
able to help us find a solution.
And now you want their help?
You had a problem with
them not too long ago, remember?
That's why we worked
so hard for a new home.
Look Somya, I'm not in the
right frame of mind right now.
Just go to sleep and let me think.
Want some cookies?
I made them,
while learning to cook online.
Have a bite and tell me if they're good.
Is your dad still mad at you?
Why does it matter?
What happened that day wasn't right.
Look Kapil,
we've been friends since childhood.
Even your marriage
couldn't come between us.
Just consider it...
as a bad dream.
I swear, one day
I'll explain everything to you.
Somya! What are you doing here?
You keep ignoring my calls!
Because you're being stubborn.
I am being stubborn?
And you're here eating cookies?
- Hello, madam.
- Somya...
Your chapter is closed.
Don't try to get Kapil's attention now.
What are you saying, Somya?
She's been after him since childhood!
Can't you see he's
not interested in you?
Look Somya, it's not as it seems.
Kapil's just a friend of mine.
Sure he is!
You can keep trying, but you're
not going to get anywhere with him.
You have outlived your usefulness.
What's she saying, Kapil?
What's wrong with you, Somya?
Don't you have any manners left?
We had enough drama yesterday.
Bhagwan Das is in jail
and we don't know what's
going to happen next.
Do you have any idea
how long this could go on for?
That's what I've been telling you!
Let's tell our families the truth!
- What do you want to tell them?
- Just wait.
Use your head, Somya.
They're investigating the matter.
If we involve our families,
the situation could get worse.
We'll have to sell
all our family jewelry
if we too end up getting investigated.
- Why are you always so scared, Kapil?
- Yes, I am scared!
We are in this situation
because of your stubbornness!
We need to think before we act.
You don't need to be a
rocket scientist to know that!
This is what you're good at!
Always blaming someone else!
Just drop it!
Sister, she's not your
daughter-in-law anymore.
Looks like a love triangle to me.
Don't be disheartened, Somya.
As a math teacher, I know that addition
and subtraction are part of life.
I loved him.
I trusted him.
I understand your pain,
but when one door closes,
another one opens...
That Mahjabeen...!
How could she take advantage
of someone's broken marriage?
People like her should be put on blast.
You want me to order coffee for you?
I'll take you home.
I'm headed that way and I have a car.
Still sulking, bro?
I'm not in the mood for this.
You need to fix the crack
before they break permanently.
I heard some rumors in court
that the housing scheme matter
could go on for a long time.
Go tell Somya.
She's the one who wants
that house so badly.
I've done 107 divorces.
You were number 108.
From what I've seen,
the foundation of relationships
that lead to divorce is often wrong.
But you and Somya have something pure.
Save it, or you won't even realize
when this fake divorce turns real.
Hey bro!
You're going back and forth
from Gwalior to Indore a lot, huh?
You got a big show
going on or something?
Not today.
Thank you.
What do you want now?
I can only come to you
if I need something or what, Somya?
Seems like it.
What is wrong with you, Somya?
Why are you saying that?
Ms. Somya, is he disturbing you?
What is this "Dimpy Sir" saying, huh?
Are you going to tell
him or should I tell him
what do you really
think about this idiot?
Should I call the cops?
Stay in your lane, weirdo.
I am talking to my wife!
You guys got divorced, Kapil.
She's not your wife anymore.
Want me to do the math
and tell you who's related to who?
Sorry, Dimpy Sir. You should leave.
I don't want you causing
a scene here, got it?
Don't worry, Ms. Somya. I got your back.
What's he doing here?
Feel free to accuse me of anything!
If I wanted to do it,
I would've done it a long time ago.
You wouldn't do jack!
You made false promises and trapped me!
I should be living
in a bungalow in Canada
with my dogs taking
a spin in my Porsche!
You love playing with people, don't you?
We got divorced because of you!
I have to lie to my
parents about everything.
Then why did you divorce me!
You should've had your dad disown you.
That was a choice too, right?
It wasn't a choice, Somya!
You know that.
And getting divorced
was an easy choice, huh?
That's who you are on the inside.
You change as soon as you learn
the situation is not in your favor.
You care about what other people make,
but you don't care about your own wife!
I've been apologizing to people
just to make your dream come true!
Do you have any idea
how much money I've borrowed?
You're not the only
one who borrowed money!
I had to take an advance
from the coaching center.
I sold all my jewelry,
including my wedding ring!
You didn't do that as a favor to me!
You did that because you were
desperate for a house of your own.
Oh Kapil,
your Chi energy is beyond fixing!
Chi... screw the Chi!
Chi can be chickweed for all I care!
Don't make me start
or I'll strip you bare!
What are you going to say, huh?
You are a crazy!
You couldn't even afford
to buy two sodas at once!
You know what, Kapil?
That's only what you're good at.
You want to talk about
what I'm good at, huh?
Listen now.
The day I ride my bike into
the market and leave tire marks,
I'll have girls lining
up to be with me, got it?
You'll ruin their lives too!
I made a mistake marrying you!
I'm the one who got trapped
because of your dream house
that you wanted at any cost!
I did want a house,
Kapil, but I wanted it for us.
For both of us.
But you won't get it.
I won't get it?
I won't get it?!
You're just like your family,
always causing a scene!
So go ahead and make a scene!
I'm done, Mr. Dubey.
I'm so done.
You're done?
- Yeah, Somya?
- Bro.
- Bro, she's pretty upset.
- You're done, huh, Somya?
Listen to me and leave.
Who asked for your advice, huh?
A few more punches and
you might learn a lesson.
You're so fake, bro.
You had a fake wedding, you lie,
and I'm the one who
needs to learn a lesson?
Good going, bro.
If hitting me solves your problem,
go ahead and do it.
"Either leave me with hope"
"That you'll come back,"
"Either leave me with hope"
"That you'll come back,"
"Or set me ablaze"
"As you walk away."
"The bond we share,"
"A love so rare,"
"Soon to be shattered,
it's hard to bear,"
"They search everywhere,"
"My eyes in despair, "
"Oh, my soul mate, how is this fair?"
"You were the one
I left the world behind for,"
"You were the one
I left the world behind for,"
"Hold on to my hand, don't let it go,"
"Together we shared"
"Everything of ours."
"Our days and nights,
together we shared,"
"Together we shared,"
"Everything of ours."
"Our joys and tears,
together we shared,"
'According to our sources,'
'the reason behind postponing the
allotment of the Public House Scheme'
'is that the government is actually
reconsidering the whole plan.'
"Wiping tears behind closed doors,"
"I will not miss you anymore!"
"Life will go on, they say,"
"But it'll never be the same,
not in any way."
"Even without the love of my life,"
"Even without the love of my life,"
"I'll try to move on, try to survive,"
"Together we shared,"
"Everything of ours."
"Our joys and tears,
together we shared,"
That was someone's house!
Chill! They can just build another one.
That was someone's house!
Don't you get it?
"That you'll come back,"
"Or set me ablaze"
"As you walk away."
"As you walk away."
Sign over here.
Somu, who was at the door?
What is it?
The allotment letter for the house.
Which house?
I applied for the Public Housing Scheme.
Has anyone seen my magnifying glass?
Forget the magnifying glass!
She just won the housing lottery.
She got a house!
She won the lottery for the house?
- Oh, my baby!
- Let me have a look.
Public Housing Scheme...
That's great!
This is amazing! You're amazing!
- You won the housing lottery!
- Congratulations, hubby.
Heartiest congratulations, hubby.
Thank you, God.
Look at her photo.
She's looking so beautiful.
Yes, look at her photo.
I knew my kid was smart.
Very smart.
- She's our kid, after all.
- But when did she even apply?
I didn't even know.
This is amazing!
Thank you, God!
Listen, let see the house.
It's beautiful!
Congratulation! Congratulation!
Congratulation, Somu.
We got the keys!
We'll put the L-shaped
couch over here.
And the chandelier light.
That's why I keep
insisting that you rest.
You need to relax
and not work all the time.
Stay blessed. Hello.
Somya, my child...
What do you want now?
Is this the way to talk to your wife?
Well, she's not technically
his wife anymore, Brother-in-law.
Keys to the house.
You had a spare key with you?
No, we don't have extra keys like that.
You have one,
I have one, and Kapil has the other.
She probably has a copy with her.
That's why she's here to give it back.
Uh, these aren't the keys to this house.
There you go!
They went behind their parents'
backs and bought a new house!
Son, you should have let us
know you wanted to live separately.
We wouldn't have had a problem with it.
Sister, what hurts the most is that
they bought the house
after getting divorced.
Don't you see,
that was her plan all along!
She used Kapil's money to buy the house,
then bounced after getting divorced.
Uh, Aunty, please be quiet.
You don't know anything.
Somya has done no such thing.
Wait, so which house
are we talking about?
I had applied for the
Public Housing Scheme.
She won the lottery.
It's golden!
Are we talking about
a house or gold here?
It's a house that's as good as gold.
How much does it weigh?
What house are we talking about?
What's going on here?
Will someone fill me in?
We got divorced for this house
so that Somya would
be eligible for the Scheme.
- Wait, what?
- That's it.
Did you guys even get divorced for real?
Yes Mom, we did get divorced,
but only on paper.
What you saw...
What you saw...
was just an act.
An act?
A fake divorce?
Oh no, my child, what have you done?
Sorry, Dad.
I am so happy!
A fake divorce, huh!
And you got a house too.
That's good.
But not everything that
glitters is gold, you know?
This Punjabi girl shattered
our home to build her own house!
She must be so happy right now!
Sister, she'll only be happy
after she leaves this family.
- Mom, come on!
- Sister...
We can see her true colors now.
So this is what Punjabis
teach their kids?
Stop it, Uncle.
Brother, tell that
guy to watch his manners
- or I'll have to put him in his place.
- Calm down.
You really think you can hit me?
What makes you think I won't stop you?
Stop it.
You're in a priest's house.
Don't be rude
or we will curse you.
Like we care! We've dealt
with tons of priests like him!
Priests like you take our
money and pray in our homes.
- That's enough, Mom. Stop.
- It's all good, dear.
You don't even have a house
to invite a priest to pray in!
Cut it out, Aunty!
I've had enough of your crap.
Somya is right,
you've just caused trouble
since you've gotten here.
What are you saying, Kapil?
- Dad!
- Kapil,
don't talk to your aunt like that.
Dad... Mom!
Deepa! Deepa!
- Open your eyes, Deepa!
- Deepa
Looks like an epilepsy attack.
Make her smell an onion or something.
Shut up!
We need to get her to the hospital.
Does anyone have a car?
- Puru!
- I have a car.
- Puru, there's no need to panic!
- It's parked right outside.
Wake up, Deepa.
- I have a car.
- Be careful.
You don't get it, ma'am.
She's never been on her own.
- She's never been without me.
- Sir...
I'll just sit on
the side and keep quiet.
Sir, please leave the room.
- I'll just sit on the side and keep quiet.
- Sir, please leave the room.
Please don't disturb us.
- It's okay, It's okay.
- We'll call you. Okay.
- Uncle, please come with me.
- I'll just sit on the side and keep quiet.
- Sir, please.
- Uncle, just come with me.
She's not used to being alone.
- She's going to worry.
- It's okay.
She just passed out.
Maybe her sugar or
blood pressure dropped.
When she wakes up and
doesn't see me around...
Just sit with me for a bit.
- He doesn't understand.
- Puru, she's going to be alright.
She will be absolutely fine.
Sit down.
- Sit down and relax.
- Sit.
Sit down, I'll go check on her.
God willing, everything will be fine.
Brother-in-law, you don't get it.
She's going to worry when she wakes up
and doesn't see me around.
She'll get well soon.
- She'll be fine, Puru.
- Uncle...
Mr. Purshottam, did you find
a donor for her liver transplant?
70% of her liver is
damaged due to cirrhosis.
We have to do a transplant,
Mr. Purshottam.
It's the only way to save her life.
Purshottam, what is the doctor saying?
When did this happen?
Uncle, we are not that useless
for you not to keep us
in the loop on her condition.
Purshottam, what's the
point of having family
if they can't help
you out when you need it?
I couldn't...
bring myself to ask anyone for help.
You could've told me at least.
What would have I told you, Sister?
What was I supposed to say?
We had to sell our house for one
and a half years of treatment.
That's why we lied and stayed with you.
Kapil and Somya have their own problems.
What was I supposed to say to anyone?
You sold your ancestral house
to pay for her medical bills?
What's a home, Sister?
A home is not just bricks and walls.
That's just a house.
It's the people who make it a home.
And... she's my home.
If I can't save her,
what's the point of having a home?
- Puru... calm down, Puru.
- She means everything.
She'll be fine, Uncle.
Uncle, go sit with Aunty.
- Come on.
- Come on.
- Come on, let's go see her.
- Come on.
She's been with me
through thick and thin.
Don't cry in front of her, Uncle.
Nothing is going to happen to Aunty.
She'll be fine.
I won't let anything happen to you.
You'll be fine.
I'll do whatever it takes, Deepa,
but I won't let anything happen to you.
Are you listening to me, Deepa?
Are you listening?
Please don't leave me.
What have we done, Kapu!
Uncle and Aunty were facing
such a dreadful situation and we...
We were so wrong to
misjudge their situation.
Uncle sold his house for Aunty.
And we...
And we let a stupid
house ruin our relationship.
Kapu, you should have fought with me,
argued with me, or even scolded me.
You should have stopped talking
to me for a couple of days.
Why did you agree to divorce me?
I wanted to be with you,
even if it meant being apart.
That house mattered to you,
and your happiness matters to me.
So I did what was... what was necessary.
Somya, you think I am stingy, right?
Yes, I am stingy.
But I can't help it.
I've been cash-strapped
since forever,
so I automatically learned to save.
I haggled over veggies,
paid 17 instead of 20,
or 15 instead of 17.
And I'm not the only one.
Millions of people do it.
We save from our everyday
lives for our future.
We make small sacrifices every day.
But when you came into my life,
I felt like I was saving it all for you.
You love 5-Star chocolates,
so I buy them for you.
And I'll never buy two sodas at once,
because your drink always tastes better.
I like Kapu instead
of Kapil because it's short
and it makes me feel more loved.
Why would I want to divorce you?
Tell me!
Silly, just looking
at you makes me all excited.
That's how much I love you.
I feel all warm and fussy inside.
I wanted to give you a better future,
and that's why...
I don't want a better future.
I want what we have right now.
Our present.
Sorry, Kapu.
No, I'm sorry, Somya.
- I'm sorry.
- I messed up.
I messed up, Kapu.
No, no,...
I don't want that house.
I don't want that house, Kapu.
I don't want to take
someone else's house.
Even I don't want the house
that ruined our relationship.
I don't want it either.
Sorry, Kapu.
This house...
Bro, is it even legal?
Yes, Brother.
It's provided by the government
with all the legal documents.
But why give it to me?
Consider it our way of making up.
But How will I pay for it?
It's a government scheme.
You'll get a loan with payment options.
Look, you and your
wife are both earning,
so you can handle the instalments
just like you handle paying
for your daughter's education.
I'll fill you in on the details.
Don't worry.
What documents do I need to provide?
Do you have an Aadhar Card?
That's all you need.
This house... this house is mine?
It's yours to keep, Mr. Daroga.
Thank you, Brother!
Hang on, I'll be right back.
Daroga, listen...
I had given them
a minimum guarantee cheque.
Please repay that back to me if you can?
Don't worry.
There's no rush, take your time but...
Let's go.
"For you, I will get the moon,"
"I will get a handful
of the stars along too,"
You're falling for her trap again?
She's going to talk you
into doing what she wants!
- Kapil!
- What?
This is not fair!
- What?
- That!
"A troublemaker mister, you'll see,"
"So be cautious lest
you fall