Zombie Rage (2023) Movie Script
(Suspenseful music)
(Creaking swing)
(Ominous music)
(Film stutter)
(News theme music)
Good afternoon.
Nelson big hammer with ckx news
reporting live from downtown winnipeg
where a recent rash and
increase in violent crime
doesn't seem to be much
of a deterrent to locals.
The mayor has been
criticized for some of his ideas,
which people think are pretty lackluster.
So we decided to meet with people
on the street to see what they think
needs to be done to improve the situation.
Hi, uh, just the city is
just going to a dump.
Do you feel like winnipeg
has a bad problem with crime?
I don't think winnipeg has a crime
problem, but some people might.
Okay, fair enough. So
you feel safe down here?
Yeah. I've always had a good time downtown.
I've never encountered
anybody sketchy at all.
Okay. Thanks very much for
your time. Really nice to meet you.
Awesome.
Nelson, big hammer, ckx news.
I just want to say quickly,
I absolutely love the hair.
That's fantastic.
I'm envious of anybody's hair.
I used to have hair like
that, but it's is downtown
winnipeg, and two weeks
ago, mine got stolen.
So this is what I'm left with.
Yes, have you heard recently
the mayor has been putting forth
a lot of ideas on how
to make the area safer.
No, but f (bleep) Him.
That's a fair statement.
A lot of people have been saying that.
Do you have any ideas on what we
can do to make it safer downtown?
I hope nothing right now is
pretty much perfect for me.
I mean, you can sell drugs
wherever (bleep) You want.
We have endless supply of customers.
I mean, just look anywhere you
want and just go around the corner.
You give anyone a little
winnipeg handshake.
Okay.
Well, thank you very much for your time.
And if you have a minute,
I'd like to talk to you
about a certain sales
transaction in a minute.
Thank you very much.
You gotta a smoke?
Actually, I don't anymore.
Somebody picked my pockets.
But do you have a minute
for a quick interview?
I do. Sure. Why not?
So have you heard recently the
mayor has put forth a few ideas
on how to revitalize the downtown
area, make it a safer place.
I'm just wondering what you think could
be done to fix up downtown winnipeg.
I think it'd be great if
we had a homeless purge
by purge...
Do you mean like the movie purge?
Exactly like the purge. You
have all the homeless people.
They have to register, and
if they don't have an address
and they can register to
one night they get put out,
and they all have to just
beat each other in the streets.
And the last one
standing, get a free house.
That's a unique idea.
You know, we could
televise that, sell tickets,
maybe make some money to
help fix up the downtown area.
Could use that money
to clean the streets after.
Brilliant plan. Thank you
very much for your time, sir.
I find that it's not safe because
there's not enough drugs around
like they would calm
everyone down if they
could find their supply.
But they say that there's a
crisis out there, but there's a
crisis if you can't find your supply.
You think there's not enough drugs here.
That's why people are just going crazy
because they can't calm themselves.
Just give me a give me a call.
All right. Thank you. All right. Thanks.
Do you have any ideas on how
we can make winnipeg safer?
I think that we should maybe put some
money into some public programing.
Getting some kids off
the streets would be nice.
You know, they just revitalizing things.
Fantastic idea.
And any other suggestion.
Well, I think that maybe we
could also just burn it all down.
We could just grab some
matches and some gasoline,
and we could just light everything on fire.
Oh, Nelson, big hammer, ckx... (Bleep)
Okay.
Thanks for your time.
Nelson, big hammer, ckx news.
Just wondering, sir, what brings
you downtown winnipeg today?
Well, I thought to bring my son
to see winnipeg and see
how great winnipeg really is.
Yeah.
Do you do you feel are you concerned at all
with the recent increase in
crime in the downtown area?
Yeah. Winnipeg's getting
really, really dangerous.
And I don't like drugs.
I'm trying ot for him to see
the drugs, but, you know, it's...
Kind of tough.
And what about you?
Do you like coming downtown winnipeg?
Don't tell him this, but I'm
kind of looking for some drugs.
Okay.
Thanks very much for coming out.
Oh, Nelson big hammer, ckx news.
Do you have time for a quick interview?
I guess you got a light.
Actually, the most
stolen thing in the world,
and it's the only thing that
wasn't swiped from me today.
Thanks for helping me out. Okay.
Have you heard of the mayor's
plans to revitalize downtown winnipeg
and how he thinks he
can make it a safer place?
Yeah, and it's bull (bleep).
Do you have any ideas on what
we can do to improve winnipeg?
Yeah.
Fight club.
You know, the first rule of fight club.
We (bleep) Don't talk about it.
We can be like a secret society.
We, the people, can make the money.
(Bleep) The government.
(Bleep) Any rule, no rules.
You can twist (bleep), grab them by the
(bleep) Nuts and just maybe pull (bleep).
Who the fuck cares? Fuck.
All right, in the bushes. Arghh...
Sir, there's zombies everywhere.
What do you
think of that? Zombies. Zombies?
What I think about it?
I'll tell you what I think
about this is Justin trudeau
and his friggin vaccines
that he gave everybody.
Look what happened.
Look what happened.
And it's wrath of god.
The wrath of god because
of these lgbtq nine, seven,
six, five, whatever the hell they are...
(Zombie eating noises)
(Gunfire)
Holy (bleep). You just saved
us from the zombie zombies.
Zombies?
(Cell phone rings) Hang on. Hold this.
What?
Don't get your panties in a knot.
I told you I'd be there if
I'm not there in 20 minutes.
Your next kilos free.
Just another typical day in winnipeg.
I'll see you in a bit.
Thanks.
Well, looks like winnipeg's
about as safe as it's ever been.
I'm headed back to the studio
(helicopter getting closer)
(Zombies gurgle)
Are you guys zombies or meth heads?
Yah!!!
(Zombies crunching)
(Old time TV station music)
(Static)
Oh, yeah dude.
This broads going down. Fuck!
Huh.
He's gonna cut her
titties off. Yeah, probably.
She's a goner, dude.
Look, doo do do. Yep, there it is.
Yep, yold you. He took her titties off.
Oh, here's our hero.
There he is.
Machete ready.
Ohhh...
Oh, nice. (Girl screaming)
Oh, yeah. Oh,
(talking on phone)
Now, this guy...
(It's a good deal, Sara.) (Screamimg)
What the fuck was that?
(Holy shit) Yeah, go look.
(This park is just
filled with season two...
(Hunter herbeck to the rescue) Go check.
Let's go. Fucking. Oh, wow. Okay. Sure. Oh,
(choking) Poor chick.
Oh, still got her tits. (Laughs)
(Sting noise)
Now fucking what?
Really?
Come on. Yeah. Come on.
What'd you do?
Just start showing boobs.
Oh, you're killing me.
Check the power.
(Coughs)
Dude. The whole system's
off. Oh, dude, we gotta, fuck...
I don't know. I wonder if
it's all fucking everywhere.
Yeah, let's check it out.
Oh, boy.
You getta look see?
Traffic lights are out dude.
Yeah, they are out.
Oh, great. Wow.
Okay, shall we check it
out. Yeah, let's go check.
All right, let's go check it out.
You first dude.
Yeah, bro.
Looks like the traffic lights are out, man?
Yeah, they are.
Maybe a truck hit a pole.
The power might be out completely.
Fucking creepy man.
I don't know. Somethings going down.
Nothing we could do about it.
Wait it out. Fresh my rip. I'll join you.
Fuck, I wonder when
the power's going to be dark on, dude.
Fuck dude. My phone's tripping.
- Really? Yeah.
Dude, really...
Told you, man.
How's yours? Workin?
I have no service.
Fucking told you. Creepy dude.
Creepy shit, man.
(Suspenseful music)
Oh, no.
Oh, hey, hey.
Whoa.
You fucking hear that?
Yeah,
dude, let's go see man.
Really? Told you.
Oh, fuck.
What's all the screaming about man?
Right, what are you doing dude?
(Door shaking) Beat it. Ahhh.
Fuck dude, stop.
I hurt my arm.
Dude, he's a crackhead don't let him in.
God. Fuck dude.
What's the matter with you?
I swear there's a bunch of
people out there and they're evil.
I don't know what the fucks going on man.
I never saw anything
like it before in my...
You're fucking on a good one dude.
What are you smokin man?
I'm not smokin' anything.
Look what the fuck he did to my arm.
Calm down, chill.
Fuck, I can't man... I need... Wait,
wait, where do think you're going/
where do you think you're going?
I gotta take care of this fuckin' arm.
Go, go.
I'm gonna check it out, all right man.
Oh, man. Oh,
ooh. Oh (Footsteps)
Oh, fuck!
(Panting) Fuck.
Get the fuck out of my spot.
Oh, god dammit. Oh fuck.
I don't want to on that.
Thanks for the in bro man.
You're lucky we let you in.
You're lucky you're in.
You're fucking on something.
I'll go fuck my...
I'm not man.
Something fucking back there wanted my arm.
Calm down. Calm down, have some water.
Oh, fuck. Thanks.
Oh, my god.
(Ominous synth sting)
What the fuck are you?
(Sting)
You got the fucking shitting me.
(Door clangs open)
Fuck this.
Hey, man, shit's going down guys.
I don't know man.
Fucking thought so dude.
Fuck.
Look at my fucking arm man. What the fuck?
Hey, dude, he ain't trippin' man.
There's fucking shit going down out
there. Yeah, right. You're full of shit.
I'm telling you bloody and fucking weird.
Shit walking fucking
bloody right there bro.
Fuck man don't go out there.
Told you. What the fuck? Fuck that dude.
No, fucking close that door.
Close the door. Lock it.
Fuck. Now what man?
He ain't lying man.
My arm don't feel to
dam good right now man.
I don't know what the
fucks going on with it.
Feels fucking funny, man.
You're bleeding all over my fucking couch.
Do you go wash yourself off?
Yeah man, clean it up.
Yeah man, bathroom's right there.
Fuck man.
What the fuck?
Dude. Really?
Unbelievable.
Arghh...
What are we going to fuckin' do man?
We got to get out of here or some shit.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, god.
Oh, oh.
I don't feel so damn good.
Oh, fuck. Oh.
What the fuck is going on?
Oh, what's happening to me?
Man.
What the fuck is happening?
Oh, god.
We need to get the fuck
out here. Shit's hitting the fan.
Let's go to my boat.
All right, well, we got to get to my car.
It's around back.
Whoa.
Did you fucking hear that?
That was loud, dude. Fuck
holy shit, dude.
That's tawny's Jeep man.
She hit one of them fuckers.
Dude, he's under the fucking car.
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! What
did you do? You just hit that guy.
(Screaming) Let's get the fuck outta here.
(Car door opening)
(Screaming)
(Footsteps running down stairs)
Shit.
Come on let's go! Go, go, go!
I killed... (Screaming)
Guys, help me!
Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh!
Upstairs...
Go, go, go, go, go.
After you dude.
(Loud footsteps on stairs)
Nom, nom, nom.
So where the fuck where you?
We didn't know what was going on.
We were in the store, and
she just started going crazy.
Lady was screaming in the aisle.
We went over there. There
was blood everywhere. I knew it.
I knew it.
Brian, where's that
dude at? We need a plan.
Dude, let's go.
Come on. Let's go to my boat.
Let's go to my boat out of here.
All right, let me go get him. Fucking guy.
Fuck him. What the fuck Brian?
Where's he at?
(Door clicks open)
Dude, dude, he's fucked up.
What?
(Synth sting)
Ah, dud fuck that. He's done. He's done.
We got to. Come on, come on. Hurry up.
(Screaming) Oh, my god!
Get the fuck out of here!
What the fuck dude.
Holy shit.
Ahhhh... ahhhhh.
(Gurgling)
(Splat)
Oh, dude.
Oh, my god! Fucking, fucking crackhead.
He's a fucker.
Mmm.. Shouldn't have let your
fucking ass in here. (Thunk, thunk, thunk)
You fucking crackhead. Fuck.
(Squish of brains splattering)
(Synth sting)
Done deal.
Let's get the fuck outta here.
You got to go. Let's go, man.
Keys are in the car.
Okay.
(Screaming)
Ah, shit! (Zombies moaning)
Go, go, go go!
(Car starting)
(Car revs away)
(Car getting closer)
(Synth drone)
(Car door closes)
(Hatch clicks shut)
Piece of cake.
(Door squeaks)
(Door clicks shut)
No alarm?
Okay.
(Emergency tone)
This is civil danger warning
effective nation wide.
Your attention is required.
All stations and cable systems
should transmit this emergency
notification message.
This is not a test.
The following emergency
message is transmitted at the request
of the United States government.
Whatever.
(Paper crinkles)
Don't fuck it up.
This will be easier then Chapman storage.
(Click)
(Punk rock on earphones)
(Punk rock gets louder)
Rhyme or riddle, impossible name
faking beauty and stay in the game
(Ominous synth drone)
(Door creaks open)
(Punk rock music continues)
every part of me is fighting to win
sin city, waiting for me
around the corner I'm begging to be
double trouble is leaning on me
next time you see me I won't
be the same oooo. Next time...
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock music)
Oooo. You'll see me shove for myself.
No beating down on someone else
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock music) no
way in hell I'm gonna die
leave me alone and I'll be fine
(Scary synth music)
(Faint punk music) (Toilet flushes)
(Punk music gets louder) next time
you see me I won't be the same
sin city I'm looking at you sin
city I'm looking at you. Sin city...
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock continues) oooo, yeah
Ugh. Gnarly.
Explains no alarm code.
Where's the closet?
(Escalating scary synth
music) (Door creaks open)
(Heavy footsteps)
What the actual fuck.
(Zombie moaning)
Oh, hell no.
Don't fuck it up.
Fuck.
(Zombies heavy breathing)
(Zombie growling)
Uh!
Uh, yah, yah! (Hammer whack, whack, whack)
Fucking kidding me.
(Door slams)
(Thunk, thunk) (Zombie squealing)
(Thunk)
(Champahne pops) (Women cheering)
It's exciting.
(Women chattering)
It's like it came so fast.
(Excited chatting and laughter)
Oh, girl you nasty!
Ooo, I did not.
Hey, now where is that stripper?
Oh, oh, oh, oh, you know what?
We're all out of champagne.
(Acoustic alt rock guitar music)
(Jeans swish with footsteps)
Welcome to wiseguys. How may I help you?
I'm going to take some
of those cones over there.
How are those? How do they hold the joint?
They're pretty good.
They're good. Okay, cool.
You know, I'm going to take
one of those green blazers.
The green.
The green.
Yeah, the green.
Green ones mine.
And I'm going to take...
How about those? Rhinos?
The horny rhino 6000.
Those work pretty good?
Well, we got some strongers ones too.
Stronger ones?
You want a stronger one?
Sure. Why do you think I have ed?
All right, let's see what we got here.
You need it for the show tonight. Okay.
I found these on a homeless person.
I'm just fucking Sam speeder.
You know what I mean.
I'm not going to use it on
fucking homeless people.
It'll make things worse.
Don't say anything about women.
I'm going to end up there with a shitty
fucking gig that I got here, you know?
So let me look at what I got.
Is that all you want?
Yeah, I guess so.
Trust me, don't get old, you
know, doing b-movie stuff,
and now I'm reduced to a
fucking cheap old fucking stripper.
Yeah, yeah. Don't get old.
All right, you guys take a quick pay.
All right, that's on tax right.
It'll be tax if you use the
card. Tax, Jesus fucking Christ.
Okay, what do I expect, it's San Pedro.
Okay.
We're all good.
- All right.
No receipt. Yep.
We're out of paper anyway.
All right.
Have a good one.
(Ominous music)
Hey get the fuck out of here you tweaker.
God dammit, you stupid fucking cunt.
Fucking bitch.
Get the fuck out of here.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
I told ya already.
Get the fuck out of here.
You come in here every fucking day.
Back the fuck up.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Back up.
Back the fuck...
The stripper is here.
You gotta get the door.
Oh, oh. Yay!
Oh, oh, it's Amy!
Always late girl. Dammit Amy.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god, you guys.
Oh, my gosh.
Like, the traffic was so bad.
Like, there were people, like, running
in the middle of the fucking street.
Like, I don't know
what's going on out there.
What? I'm so sorry.
Yeah, it's not even noon yet.
I don't. Yeah, I know. I don't know.
Is there like some sports
game or something?
No, the playoffs are done.
Well I don't fucking do sports.
So let's do this party!
Yeah, yay, yeah. All right Veronica!
Woohoo!
Ah, fucking ugly cunt. I'm
going to get rabies after this here.
What the fuck?
Jesus, fucking.
(Synth sting)
Last time I'm coming to this fucking town.
Fucking shit.
Oh, my god.
This food is so good.
Thank you so much for inviting me.
Your friends are so nice.
Of course I invited you.
Let's raise our glasses
and toast to Veronica.
Of course! Yes!
I'm a little nervous. I don't like
talking in front of people, but.
I promise to keep this short so we can
hurry up and get our party on. Woo!
I want to thank you
all for being able to celebrate
my best friend Veronica.
On your last day as a single lady.
Yeah, I never thought
she'd get married again.
Again? Yeah.
You don't know about number one? Shit.
How many times have you been married?
But today is a special day no matter what.
It's a special day.
The final farewell to the Vixen, Veronica.
Tomorrow she'll be an
official reformed cougar.
Oh, I'll just leave these are my final
parting words you can
bestow into your wedding day.
And she walks down the
aisle toward her beloved Rob.
She'll be all smiles knowing
she's given her last blow job.
Oh my god!
(Laughter0
cheers!
It's called a blow job because
it's fucking work, man.
Let me tell you, if I'm doing it right.
It's fucking work. Yeah, you
could get lockjaw from that.
It's no fun.
I mean, so I heard
are you talking from experience?
Ladies, I just wanted to say.
Thank you so much for being here.
You are my closest friends,
and this means so much to me.
I just love you ladies so
much. Like, thank you so much.
(Knock on door)
(Women squealing) Oh my god!
I feel giddy!
Whoa! Yay! (Excited screaming)
I'm excited to be here. Yes, she is!
Whoa, woo, woo!
So, how's it goin'? Woo, yay!
Break me off a piece of that.
Yeah.
Well, first and foremost, ladies,
tell me where a bathroom that
I got to get into my dental floss
you're all into oral hygiene.
Ha, ha, ha. It's over there, hurry up!
Oh, my god! Oh, gosh.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my gosh. He's so fine!
Fuck oh my god!
(Excited conversation)
You better fuck that
dude. Oh my god, I can't.
Oh, says you can't fuck.
You're not married yet.
Yeah, right.
Okay.
(Excited conversation)
Right here and now.
Damn. I hope you brought
a lot of fucking money.
(Laughter)
I'll drink to that.
Whee!
(Snorts)
Fucking homeless bitch.
Red scratch fever. Fuck.
Ugh.
Oh. How am I going to go out like this?
(Drawer scrapes)
Maybe... ah, good.
Ah, fucking homeless piece of shit.
Why? Fuck
ok, inside.
Just go in to get these
fucking tips. I'm booking my ass out.
These fucking bitches better
leave me a good tip.
Oh, my god! Woo!
Woo! Wow! Yoohoo! Alright!
Okay, now I'm giving. You a tip so
you have credit here.
All of you here.
So you can get started.
Yes! Alright!
Oh, woohoo!
(Sexy music starts) Woo! Yeah!
(Cheering)
Take it off! Take it off!
Take it off! Take it off!
Woohoo!
Whoa!
Woo! (Cat calls)
Come on!
Yeah! Are we having fun!
Woo! Come on baby!
Oh, my gosh.
Oh my god! You got anything in there?
Wow! Yeah!
Snap it!
(Laughter and screams)
Oh, whoa
woohoo!
Oh, you know you want it.
Oh, oh, oh,
Shake it!
Woo!
Wow!
Yeah! Take it off!
Shake it! Give it to her!
It's her party! Shake it! Shake it!
Woohoo!
It's too much!
Oh, my god!
Yeah! Woo!
Alright!
Wow!
Come on beat her!
Right on!
(Laughter)
Yeah!
Get naked!
Woo!
Woo (clapping)
Yeah!
Yes!
All right, all right ladies.
Got any more tips for my coin purse?
(Laughter)
Better not be just a stack
of dimes in there, buddy.
I'll give you a stack of dimes.
I'll smack a little all over your face.
Whoa!
Wow, woo!
Woo! Yay!
Oh, my god.
That was incredible.
Oh, thanl you ladies.
I hope that was a six orgasm dance for you.
(Laughter)
Well ladies, oh my god!
As much as I'd like to do
more magic Mike with you.
You guys are all lovely
magic milfs.
Woo! I'll take it!
That's right! Yeah!
(Excited chatter) I'd like
to bite off a piece of your...
Hmm, rrrrr, grrr.
Hey, are you there?
What's she doing?
Shit. I didn't tip you enough.
What can you do for $100?
Carmen! I can do a lot for
100 bucks baby. Come on.
Carmen... Looks like
cramen is getting some action.
I do a lot for 100 bucks.
Mmm. (Smooching noises)
Horny bitch (Giggles) (Butt slap)
What do you want the
pump and grind? Mmm hmm.
Yeah?
Ahhh.
Mmmm. Mmmm.
(Synth sting) Ahhh. Oww.
What the fuck are you doing?
Stop it.
(Screams)
(Knock on door)
Carmen!
Quit being such a fucking ho.
Come on.
Ha, ha. She probably does
have a dick in her mouth.
Let me see what the fuck's going on.
Oh, my god, what the
fuck are you doing to her?
What the fuck! Ahhh, ahhhh.
(Screams) (Synth sting)
Arghh!
Oh my god! (Screaming)
(High pitched screams)
Go to hell!
(More screaming)
(Synth sting)
Uh.
Ahhhh. Ahhhh.
Huh, huh, huh.
Help! Nahhh, ha, na.
Oh, no, no.
Ahhh, ha, ha.
Yum, um, num. Get the fuck off of me!
Oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, ya, ha, ha.
Oh, oh.
Oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh,
better her than me.
Uh, uh.
But, help, stop!
Go, no!
Ahhh, ha, ha.
Gahh, ha, ha.
Ahhh, ha. Uh.
(Ominous synth drone)
(Heavy footsteps)
(Zombie scream)
Welcome everybody to conspiracy corner
I'm your host John, today
we have a treat for you.
We give you the conspiracy
theories as they come live.
So today we got a special treat for you.
The living dead has taken over
Las Vegas and now the entire world.
I just watched a YouTube video
just lie rally like 5 minutes ago,
and I keep my notes here, so I'm looking
down I'm not writing a script I promise.
The governor has issued martial
law forcing us to stay inside our homes.
Hmmm. Does this sound familiar?
Maybe 2020?
Flesh eating zombies.
He scores these zombies.
Whatever you want to
call them at this point?
Created by the elite.
The illuminati
the cabal
whatever you want to
call them. Hilary Clinton?
Whatever you want to
call them at this point.
I don't care what you want to
call them. They are zombies. Ok?
They were created by the
government and Hollywood.
Is this population control?
I think so.
If these things bite you,
you will become one of them.
And you will start feasting
on the rest of the living.
Including babies.
Wake up america! Before it's too late.
(Zombie screams)
I don't know what you have,
but I don't want it.
I need you to get the fuck away.
I don't want your syphilis bitch.
I will shoot you.
(Gunfire)
(Thud)
Grrrr
grrrr
fuck.
(Whack)
Ahhhh.
Uhhh, uhhh. (Door handle rattles)
(Heavy breathing)
(Click)
Shit! (Scary synth music swells)
(Crash)
(Irregular footsteps)
(Klong)
Dammit, Karen.
I've got you now.
Die! (Squish)
(Crickets)
(Beep emergency tone)
(Static)
I am pastor Donald.
The apocalypse is upon us.
And it's your fault that it is.
You removed prayer from schools.
You allow people to abort babies
after they are born, using their umbilical
cords to strangle them, to murder them.
You are allowing boys to become
girls and girls to become boys.
You voted for the wrong president.
These are the things that have upset god.
These are the things.
That make him upset.
And now it is his wrath.
He's taking sinners
and turning them against
the christians.
The undead are now attacking
good wholesome christians.
And it's your fault.
It's your fault.
The blue haired, the green haired,
the rainbow coalition.
You've done all the things to
make sure that the world will
come to an end.
You will anger the almighty.
And now Las Vegas.
Sin city
is now doomed because of you.
That's right.
Because of you.
You didn't read the Bible.
You didn't listen to what we had to say.
You didn't give
enough money to the church.
Instead, you bought
medication, you bought groceries.
You got gas for your car.
But that money could
have gone to the church.
That money could have helped
with getting you into heaven.
And now, look.
The apocalypse is on us
and it's your fault.
Are you going to go to heaven?
I don't think so.
Because of your activities.
Who knows now?
Who knows if you're going to heaven?
I don't.
Do you?
All I have to say is pray.
Just pray.
Vegas is doomed.
The country is doomed.
The world is doomed
because you went against god.
(Emergency beep tone)
(Static)
(Ominous music)
(Boom)
(Bang)
Grrr, nah.
Yah.
(Whack) Yah!
Duh, uh. Uh. (Thud, thud)
Yuh. (Thud)
(Soothing synth tones)
(Harsh synth sting)
Ahhh!
Nom, nom, nom. (Squish)
This is ktnv 13 serving
the city of Las Vegas.
We are interrupting our program to
deliver an emergency alert system message.
Please stand by.
(Beep, beep, beep)
(Emergency tone)
The following message is transmitted
at the request of the Nevada state
emergency management agency.
This is not a test to all
residents receiving this broadcast.
Lock all your doors
immediately and stay indoors.
In several American cities,
there have been reports of
rioting, mass panic and explosions.
The 911 hotline is now
operating with limited capacity
due to the high volume of calls.
If you have any information
and or sightings, please contact
the Nevada state central
dispatch at 317692588.
(Ominous synth music)
(Upbeat acoustic guitar alt rock)
So how was your night last night?
Okay.
Let me tell you, ladies
about Chad last night.
Chad, that's a new name.
Have we heard that name before?
No, I just met him online. Oh, okay.
Hold up.
Did you meet him on tinder?
Hinge, farmers only? It was hinge. Okay.
Quite a respectable app.
Yeah, that's good. We can work with that.
We like that. Nice and safe.
We met in a public spot.
Okay, good.
Did you like take you out anywhere nice?
- He did.
He took me to this really
nice Italian restaurant.
Oh, I like Italian. That's good.
And did he pay?
He did. Good.
Princess treatment.
Yeah, exactly. I don't settle for less.
No kidding.
You already know.
Okay. Like, are you still...
Aren't you still doing that diet?
I am. So, yeah, I was.
That's okay. I didn't get to eat that much.
What, like a lettuce here?
Grass there?
Yeah. Um, I'm.
I had a dessert.
That's better.
He was.
He was very cool.
And he was teaching
me this new thing, right?
So I was pretty much crying
the whole dinner about um
how I couldn't eat any food.
Yeah. Uh, huh as I would.
So he taught me this trick.
Oh, okay. Tell us more.
So we incorporated the
food into the bedroom.
Oh, okay. A three course meal.
I see.
I like that. Well kind of.
It was just bacon.
Just bacon? Okay. It's my favorite food.
Yeah. Yeah.
So, did you, like, fried
up together and eat it?
And just watch a movie or
something? Knid of. Kind of?
Okay.
Hold up. What's going
on here? What happened?
Give us the details. We
need all of it right now.
So I had this, bacon
and I just kept it in my throat, like,
the whole time that we were fucking.
Isn't it like greasy.
Didn't it like. Uh, yeah.
It was so good.
It was so tasty.
Okay, but it was great
because I didn't have to eat it.
It was just there in my
throat the whole time.
It was so hot. Yeah.
And, like, we just sitting there,
like, or was he fucking you?
Oh, yeah.
He was fucking, you? Miss bad.
Which hole? You're wild.
Okay, you already know.
Know what? Back door.
Oh, my god.
Like, wow.
Where did you even.
Like I said, he treated me like a Princess.
I gave him the royal treatment.
Oh, I swear.
Oh, my goodness. And what happened?
Did you just, like, end up
eating the bacon after or what?
Well, no. So what you do
is you pull it out at the end.
That's a waste.
When you guys are like finishing?
Mmm, hmm.
And he yanked it out and
my ass clinched really hard.
Oh, my god, girl, we came so hard.
My goodness.
This is wild.
I love it.
Apparently it's called a wolf bagging.
Wolf bagging? I've never
heard of it. Never heard. Right.
Where did you learn this?
- I know.
I thought I knew everything and
this guy was teaching me new tricks.
Okay, well, okay.
I love that. And you're
going to see him again.
I am going to wait
a couple days, you know,
play hard to get. There you go.
Yeah. Okay. Real question, though.
What does he do fo work?
Uhh.
Oh, okay.
He's a farmer.
Oh, my god. Get out of here.
Are you kidding me? What's
up with you and farmers?
I swear.
No wonder you use the bacon.
I know he probably learned
it on the farm, like, oh,
I have some hogs going to kill them
and just fry up to bacon and see what
we can do with it.
God.
What can I say they're freaks.
They're good to the animals.
I mean, true that.
He has manners.
Okay. Have you ever dated a farmer?
No. Okay, good.
And I don't want to now. I know. I...
Like.
Well, good. More for me.
I respect that. That is.
And I love that for you.
But I could never like I need money.
I don't need greasy, dirty hands.
All right, well, I'll take the family,
man, and you take the money.
And then best of both worlds.
When I have my mansion,
you guys can live in it.
Exactly. I love that.
Oh, my god. We're all going
to live together in your mansion.
Yes. We could, like, have a whole thing.
It will be so much fun.
But, like, don't worry.
I got us all covered.
Hey, Ronnie, I really appreciate
you coming out today, man.
Of course. My pleasure.
When I got the message for you, you
wanted me to come and join you and
help you out in a pinch.
I was honored man. Great I
need someone solid on my team.
Thank you. Thank you for considering me.
You know, I have to share
the same views you have on,
you know, the problems with our community.
Yes, you know what...
With the crime and the vagrants,
it's fucking mess, you know?
Well, you know, here's my
philosophy the way I see it.
The vagrancy is kind of like
a scourge to our community.
It's like, um
a plague, if you will.
And people like you and me, we're like.
We're like the vaccines. There you go.
How do you like that? I like that.
- Yeah.
Maybe we'll use that on the page. Yeah?
That'll get us noticed.
By all the hot chicks!
Oh, hey, I wasn't even
thinking about that angle.
Also, I've been thinking about
some names for our page okay.
What do you got? Well, let me run
a by, you know, see what you think.
How about beat city street sweepers?
That's kind of cheesy.
No. Yeah.
Well, I got another one to
kind of more serious about. Um,
let's see.
Windows into the homes of the homeless?
That's kind of long. I
don't know what else.
Okay, well, how about we shorten
it to windows with dirk and rod?
I like that we use their name
in there. That's a good thing.
Our name isn't Neil and Bob.
Yeah, right. That's a good one.
I got one more about encampment raid
the no mooch motel, vagrants check in.
We check them out. Right. Right.
Okay, I like that. For sure.
Speaking to checking them out.
Wasn't there in the cabin
you were talking about?
Yeah, it's down over here.
There's a bunch of
homeless shit over here, man.
Okay, let's go check it out.
Okay. I'm with you.
Okay.
Crazy enough
let's not even talk
about in n out right now.
Yeah, I totally forgot.
You're on a diet. Oh, god.
When are you off of it?
I'm so bored with it. Right?
You trust me?
Did you hear that? Shhh.
It's over here.
Just take it a look.
Hey, you brought binoculars?
Dying is a motherfucker.
You didn't tell me I would
have brought something.
Good thing I brought this.
The hell are you going to
do that? See a flying cow?
Of course I probably could.
I got a pretty good view down there.
Hey, you see that guy?
You recognize that guy? You do?
Yeah. He's the king of the encampments.
His name is homeless
Harry. I got a file on him.
Okay, let's go check this out. Okay.
What do you want me to do?
That get rid of that
thing and I'll film it.
Okay. Let's go.
(Slurping and chomping)
Hey.
Are you okay?
I used to always go
investigate these situations.
I'm a capricorn. What
do you expect. Oh, boy.
Come on, let's go check it out.
Yeah, it's probably like,
this is going to be fun.
It's going to be like a coyote or
something. It's going to be fun.
Oh, yeah.
I love. Coyotes.
Great.
Are you ok?
(Footsteps) What the fuck?
Come don't hang back on us.
I swear
we're all in this together.
(Slurping and crunching)
Ahhh! Oh, my god!
Oh, god. Fuck
(screams)
Oh god! Oh god!
Fuck!
(Heavy ominous music)
(Footsteps dragging on gravel)
Yeahhhh.
Oh, shit, oh fuck. No, no, no!
(Scraming and crying)
(Quiet footsteps)
It's over this way.
Come on over here.
I'm right behind you, dude.
What the fuck? What the
hell is going on over there?
Fuck!
(Synth sting)
What the fuck are you doing?
What the fuck bro?
No, no, he's coming right at
us bro. Jesus Christ that's gross.
Oh, fuck let's get out of here man.
Come on. Fuck.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Fuck this bro. Fuck this (Gunshots)
Holy shit!
Shoot 'em in the brain!
Okay (gunshot)
(Squish)
Oh, fuck. Fuck that.
Come on, let's go, bro. Fuck.
(Background small talk)
Kick their ass... Bullshit.
That team sucked but we still lost.
Going to the bar?
Yeah.
Whose down for goig to the bar after this?
I think we all need one after that game.
Yeah. Okay. I don't know.
I'd rather have a cup of bong hits
myself. (Gunfire) Oh, shit! Whoa!
Is that gunfire? No that
sounded like fireworks.
No, that was gunfire. I know
what that shit sounds like.
Sounded like gunfire.
I'm thinking gunfire myself.
Where did it come from
over there man. I can't tell.
Yeah, that was gunshots.
Where did it come from?
Right up there.
I think it's that way. I
got an echo in here, man.
I heard a reverb off of
the canyon there oh, shit.
Help!
Oh shit! Rick!
Rick, help me!
Rick.
Oh, god.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, fuck! Run!
What the fuck is this?
(Panting)
Oh, shit.
They got him man.
Oh, dude, they took a bite
out of Tony. What the fuck.
Dude, what the fuck was that guy?
I've never seen shit like that before.
Yeah, never seen shit
like that before. Scumbag.
Was thatt some psycho homeless guy or what?
You got a signal? Ain't got shit.
Fuck signal.
I don't either. I didn't even bring
my cell phone. I left it in the car.
What do we do? Nothing.
We get back to the car.
We got to get the fuck out of here.
All right, let's go.
Ah, fuck! More of them!
Watch out for. Stupid.
Get the fuck outta here.
Dude.
Fuck. Come on.
Get the fuck off me.
(Zombies moaning)
Holy shit. There comes somebody.
Where did you girls come from?
Who are you?
It doesn't matter.
We just saw two people get eaten by people.
Our buddy just got fucked up.
They took a chunk out of him.
Do you guys got a car around here?
Where? How far?
We've been running everywhere.
I think we're just close up here.
We got a car that's like 5 minutes away.
We got to get there and
get the fuck out of here.
Find, find the police or
do something. I don't know.
Let's get out of here.
Yeah. Hey, I can't run no more.
I'm going to piss myself.
No way. I'm going to take
a piss before we leave.
Just give me a sec,
okay? Make it quick, bro.
Fuck.
All right.
Hey I'm going to go check up on him man.
Alright. Is there any people up that way?
Fuck dude.
I hope it's 5 minutes away.
Tony got fucked up man.
Hey, man.
Thanks for coming to watch my back.
Yeah, I drank a 12 pack while
we played that game, man.
Hurry up man we got to
get the fuck outta here.
Oh, dude, I got to go
or I'm gonna fucking piss myself.
(Synth sting)
Hey Rick! What? Rick!
Rick! What?
Rick!
Fuck.
Oh, ow! Oh. Fuck!
Oh, oh (Zombies moaning)
Well, fuck, man.
When he gets back to here, we got
to boogie. Get the fuck out of dodge.
Yeah.
Fuck. Oh, fucking run! What the fuck?
Oh, shit. Run (Girls scream)
Shit, there's more of them.
How many are there dude?
(Gunfire)
(Zombies moaning)
Nailed her! (Hand slap)
Good job. Get the fuck
outta here bro. Oh, fuck.
You know where the car is?
I think it's about another 200 yards away.
Yeah.
(Synth sting) (Screaming) Oh, shit!
Oh, fuck let's get out of here.
(Screaming)
(Zombie munching) (Gasping)
Uhhh.
Fuck there's more man hurry up.
Hurry up.
Oh, come on, oh, fuck man.
Take a break man. Fuck the women.
Man they're everywhere
dude. What are we going to do.
Hey dude you got any tissue? No man.
I think I shit myself a little bit.
Don't worry about it right now man.
Oh, fuck. No, no, no.
(Gunshots)
Hey man! (Distant sirens)
Oh, oh.
(Zombies moaning)
(Suspenseful music)
All right.
How much farther to the car?
You got about 50 yards
that way around the corner.
There's a shit load of them down there man.
They're all over. You're killing
me man. You're killing me.
Which way are we going to go?
The car's that way.
Ii don't know man. Let's
get out of here this way.
We're fucked man. Oh, shit! (Synth sting)
Fucking run! (Screaming)
Arghhh!
(Heavy breathing and panting)
Oh, fuck. Oh, my god.
What the fuck. We got to get out of here.
You got a car? I do, but it's
the way the fuck down there.
Shit. And all those freaks are up there.
What the fuck is that?
(Gunshots)
Oh, hey, man.
Hey, hey. We need help.
Who the fuck are you?
We were just playing softball.
We ran across these girls.
All right, we're trapped.
I was trying to get to my car.
The car is in the paking lot.
Well, you're kind of fucked here.
They're swarming all over the place. Oh,
fuck. The parking lot is teeming with them.
Jesus Christ. They're all over the place.
There! (Gunshots)
Fuck dude, run! Run, run, run!
(Zombies moaning)
Oh fucking a.
Oh, shit.
(Gunshots)
Oh, there ain't no way I'm going to
become one of those mother fucking things.
Ain't no fucking way.
(Gunshot)
(Zombies moaning)
Yarghhh.
Come on!
The car's ahead.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
The car is back this way man.
Fuck it dude. They're all over the place.
They're everywhere.
What are we going to do?
We gotta go some place. (Synth sting)
Guess we'll go back around the corner.
Oh shit!
What's the matter?
Oh shit! (Screamimg)
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Let's go! Shit!
Ahhhh! (Gunshot)
Ahhh!
Oh shit! Owww!
Arghhh!
Ahhhh!
(Ominous music)
Fuck.
There's more of these
bastards every goddamn second.
Fucking, they're everywhere, man.
Oh, fuck this shit. I'm out of here.
No, no.
It's dangerous to go.
Do not go by yourself.
Dude, you guys are on your
own. I'm outta here. No, no.
No!
What the fuck?
Fuck they're everywhere man.
One over there. (Gunshots)
Back this way.
Come on. Go!
Oh, my god.
All right,
I'm here.
If I can just get up to the street
and maybe flag somebody down.
Get out of...
Fuck. What the fuck? Fuck.
Fuck. Oh my god!
Jesus fucking Christ!
Yahhhh!
Man, these mother
fuckers are everywhere man.
It's scary around here.
They're all over the place.
(Screaming)
(Gunshot)
Fuck it what's going on? (Gun clicks empty)
Yeah.
Arghhh!
Oh, god.
Help!
Look there's more! Oh my god! Oh my god!
(Screamimg)
No! (Zombies moaning)
(Screaming)
(News theme music)
Terror, chaos, and fear gripped the nation.
Then a zombie
outbreak occurred, making everyone's
lives a little more difficult this week.
While some people living in
the downtown core of winnipeg
saw no difference in the matter.
The rest of the world is plunging into
complete anarchy and lawlessness.
Supply chains have been disrupted.
Politicians have disappeared
to the underground bunkers and even the
Internet is going in and out of service.
Mika stone
reporting live from a safer location.
With me, I have to comment
world renowned billionaire
and virologists Bill Gates.
Bill Gates.
What do you have to comment
on the current situation?
Well, I can assure you that
none of this came from a lab.
We have scientists working
around the clock looking at all
the data to make sure
that... (Zombies moaning)
(Maching gun fire)
(Zombies gurgling) (Static)
(Screaming)
(Zombies hissing)
(Whack) What we got to get out of here.
I know how to stop this thing
but you're going to have
to come with me right now.
There aren't a lot of humans left.
(Zombies growling)
(Screaming) Help! Someone help!
(Screaming)
Ya! Ya! Ha!
(Slurping and munching)
It was at this moment he knew
he fucked up.
Yaaaa! Arghhh!
(Static)
(Emergency tone)
(Heavy synth rock)
(Acoustic guitar alternative rock)
(Scary synth rock)
(Creaking swing)
(Ominous music)
(Film stutter)
(News theme music)
Good afternoon.
Nelson big hammer with ckx news
reporting live from downtown winnipeg
where a recent rash and
increase in violent crime
doesn't seem to be much
of a deterrent to locals.
The mayor has been
criticized for some of his ideas,
which people think are pretty lackluster.
So we decided to meet with people
on the street to see what they think
needs to be done to improve the situation.
Hi, uh, just the city is
just going to a dump.
Do you feel like winnipeg
has a bad problem with crime?
I don't think winnipeg has a crime
problem, but some people might.
Okay, fair enough. So
you feel safe down here?
Yeah. I've always had a good time downtown.
I've never encountered
anybody sketchy at all.
Okay. Thanks very much for
your time. Really nice to meet you.
Awesome.
Nelson, big hammer, ckx news.
I just want to say quickly,
I absolutely love the hair.
That's fantastic.
I'm envious of anybody's hair.
I used to have hair like
that, but it's is downtown
winnipeg, and two weeks
ago, mine got stolen.
So this is what I'm left with.
Yes, have you heard recently
the mayor has been putting forth
a lot of ideas on how
to make the area safer.
No, but f (bleep) Him.
That's a fair statement.
A lot of people have been saying that.
Do you have any ideas on what we
can do to make it safer downtown?
I hope nothing right now is
pretty much perfect for me.
I mean, you can sell drugs
wherever (bleep) You want.
We have endless supply of customers.
I mean, just look anywhere you
want and just go around the corner.
You give anyone a little
winnipeg handshake.
Okay.
Well, thank you very much for your time.
And if you have a minute,
I'd like to talk to you
about a certain sales
transaction in a minute.
Thank you very much.
You gotta a smoke?
Actually, I don't anymore.
Somebody picked my pockets.
But do you have a minute
for a quick interview?
I do. Sure. Why not?
So have you heard recently the
mayor has put forth a few ideas
on how to revitalize the downtown
area, make it a safer place.
I'm just wondering what you think could
be done to fix up downtown winnipeg.
I think it'd be great if
we had a homeless purge
by purge...
Do you mean like the movie purge?
Exactly like the purge. You
have all the homeless people.
They have to register, and
if they don't have an address
and they can register to
one night they get put out,
and they all have to just
beat each other in the streets.
And the last one
standing, get a free house.
That's a unique idea.
You know, we could
televise that, sell tickets,
maybe make some money to
help fix up the downtown area.
Could use that money
to clean the streets after.
Brilliant plan. Thank you
very much for your time, sir.
I find that it's not safe because
there's not enough drugs around
like they would calm
everyone down if they
could find their supply.
But they say that there's a
crisis out there, but there's a
crisis if you can't find your supply.
You think there's not enough drugs here.
That's why people are just going crazy
because they can't calm themselves.
Just give me a give me a call.
All right. Thank you. All right. Thanks.
Do you have any ideas on how
we can make winnipeg safer?
I think that we should maybe put some
money into some public programing.
Getting some kids off
the streets would be nice.
You know, they just revitalizing things.
Fantastic idea.
And any other suggestion.
Well, I think that maybe we
could also just burn it all down.
We could just grab some
matches and some gasoline,
and we could just light everything on fire.
Oh, Nelson, big hammer, ckx... (Bleep)
Okay.
Thanks for your time.
Nelson, big hammer, ckx news.
Just wondering, sir, what brings
you downtown winnipeg today?
Well, I thought to bring my son
to see winnipeg and see
how great winnipeg really is.
Yeah.
Do you do you feel are you concerned at all
with the recent increase in
crime in the downtown area?
Yeah. Winnipeg's getting
really, really dangerous.
And I don't like drugs.
I'm trying ot for him to see
the drugs, but, you know, it's...
Kind of tough.
And what about you?
Do you like coming downtown winnipeg?
Don't tell him this, but I'm
kind of looking for some drugs.
Okay.
Thanks very much for coming out.
Oh, Nelson big hammer, ckx news.
Do you have time for a quick interview?
I guess you got a light.
Actually, the most
stolen thing in the world,
and it's the only thing that
wasn't swiped from me today.
Thanks for helping me out. Okay.
Have you heard of the mayor's
plans to revitalize downtown winnipeg
and how he thinks he
can make it a safer place?
Yeah, and it's bull (bleep).
Do you have any ideas on what
we can do to improve winnipeg?
Yeah.
Fight club.
You know, the first rule of fight club.
We (bleep) Don't talk about it.
We can be like a secret society.
We, the people, can make the money.
(Bleep) The government.
(Bleep) Any rule, no rules.
You can twist (bleep), grab them by the
(bleep) Nuts and just maybe pull (bleep).
Who the fuck cares? Fuck.
All right, in the bushes. Arghh...
Sir, there's zombies everywhere.
What do you
think of that? Zombies. Zombies?
What I think about it?
I'll tell you what I think
about this is Justin trudeau
and his friggin vaccines
that he gave everybody.
Look what happened.
Look what happened.
And it's wrath of god.
The wrath of god because
of these lgbtq nine, seven,
six, five, whatever the hell they are...
(Zombie eating noises)
(Gunfire)
Holy (bleep). You just saved
us from the zombie zombies.
Zombies?
(Cell phone rings) Hang on. Hold this.
What?
Don't get your panties in a knot.
I told you I'd be there if
I'm not there in 20 minutes.
Your next kilos free.
Just another typical day in winnipeg.
I'll see you in a bit.
Thanks.
Well, looks like winnipeg's
about as safe as it's ever been.
I'm headed back to the studio
(helicopter getting closer)
(Zombies gurgle)
Are you guys zombies or meth heads?
Yah!!!
(Zombies crunching)
(Old time TV station music)
(Static)
Oh, yeah dude.
This broads going down. Fuck!
Huh.
He's gonna cut her
titties off. Yeah, probably.
She's a goner, dude.
Look, doo do do. Yep, there it is.
Yep, yold you. He took her titties off.
Oh, here's our hero.
There he is.
Machete ready.
Ohhh...
Oh, nice. (Girl screaming)
Oh, yeah. Oh,
(talking on phone)
Now, this guy...
(It's a good deal, Sara.) (Screamimg)
What the fuck was that?
(Holy shit) Yeah, go look.
(This park is just
filled with season two...
(Hunter herbeck to the rescue) Go check.
Let's go. Fucking. Oh, wow. Okay. Sure. Oh,
(choking) Poor chick.
Oh, still got her tits. (Laughs)
(Sting noise)
Now fucking what?
Really?
Come on. Yeah. Come on.
What'd you do?
Just start showing boobs.
Oh, you're killing me.
Check the power.
(Coughs)
Dude. The whole system's
off. Oh, dude, we gotta, fuck...
I don't know. I wonder if
it's all fucking everywhere.
Yeah, let's check it out.
Oh, boy.
You getta look see?
Traffic lights are out dude.
Yeah, they are out.
Oh, great. Wow.
Okay, shall we check it
out. Yeah, let's go check.
All right, let's go check it out.
You first dude.
Yeah, bro.
Looks like the traffic lights are out, man?
Yeah, they are.
Maybe a truck hit a pole.
The power might be out completely.
Fucking creepy man.
I don't know. Somethings going down.
Nothing we could do about it.
Wait it out. Fresh my rip. I'll join you.
Fuck, I wonder when
the power's going to be dark on, dude.
Fuck dude. My phone's tripping.
- Really? Yeah.
Dude, really...
Told you, man.
How's yours? Workin?
I have no service.
Fucking told you. Creepy dude.
Creepy shit, man.
(Suspenseful music)
Oh, no.
Oh, hey, hey.
Whoa.
You fucking hear that?
Yeah,
dude, let's go see man.
Really? Told you.
Oh, fuck.
What's all the screaming about man?
Right, what are you doing dude?
(Door shaking) Beat it. Ahhh.
Fuck dude, stop.
I hurt my arm.
Dude, he's a crackhead don't let him in.
God. Fuck dude.
What's the matter with you?
I swear there's a bunch of
people out there and they're evil.
I don't know what the fucks going on man.
I never saw anything
like it before in my...
You're fucking on a good one dude.
What are you smokin man?
I'm not smokin' anything.
Look what the fuck he did to my arm.
Calm down, chill.
Fuck, I can't man... I need... Wait,
wait, where do think you're going/
where do you think you're going?
I gotta take care of this fuckin' arm.
Go, go.
I'm gonna check it out, all right man.
Oh, man. Oh,
ooh. Oh (Footsteps)
Oh, fuck!
(Panting) Fuck.
Get the fuck out of my spot.
Oh, god dammit. Oh fuck.
I don't want to on that.
Thanks for the in bro man.
You're lucky we let you in.
You're lucky you're in.
You're fucking on something.
I'll go fuck my...
I'm not man.
Something fucking back there wanted my arm.
Calm down. Calm down, have some water.
Oh, fuck. Thanks.
Oh, my god.
(Ominous synth sting)
What the fuck are you?
(Sting)
You got the fucking shitting me.
(Door clangs open)
Fuck this.
Hey, man, shit's going down guys.
I don't know man.
Fucking thought so dude.
Fuck.
Look at my fucking arm man. What the fuck?
Hey, dude, he ain't trippin' man.
There's fucking shit going down out
there. Yeah, right. You're full of shit.
I'm telling you bloody and fucking weird.
Shit walking fucking
bloody right there bro.
Fuck man don't go out there.
Told you. What the fuck? Fuck that dude.
No, fucking close that door.
Close the door. Lock it.
Fuck. Now what man?
He ain't lying man.
My arm don't feel to
dam good right now man.
I don't know what the
fucks going on with it.
Feels fucking funny, man.
You're bleeding all over my fucking couch.
Do you go wash yourself off?
Yeah man, clean it up.
Yeah man, bathroom's right there.
Fuck man.
What the fuck?
Dude. Really?
Unbelievable.
Arghh...
What are we going to fuckin' do man?
We got to get out of here or some shit.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, god.
Oh, oh.
I don't feel so damn good.
Oh, fuck. Oh.
What the fuck is going on?
Oh, what's happening to me?
Man.
What the fuck is happening?
Oh, god.
We need to get the fuck
out here. Shit's hitting the fan.
Let's go to my boat.
All right, well, we got to get to my car.
It's around back.
Whoa.
Did you fucking hear that?
That was loud, dude. Fuck
holy shit, dude.
That's tawny's Jeep man.
She hit one of them fuckers.
Dude, he's under the fucking car.
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! What
did you do? You just hit that guy.
(Screaming) Let's get the fuck outta here.
(Car door opening)
(Screaming)
(Footsteps running down stairs)
Shit.
Come on let's go! Go, go, go!
I killed... (Screaming)
Guys, help me!
Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh!
Upstairs...
Go, go, go, go, go.
After you dude.
(Loud footsteps on stairs)
Nom, nom, nom.
So where the fuck where you?
We didn't know what was going on.
We were in the store, and
she just started going crazy.
Lady was screaming in the aisle.
We went over there. There
was blood everywhere. I knew it.
I knew it.
Brian, where's that
dude at? We need a plan.
Dude, let's go.
Come on. Let's go to my boat.
Let's go to my boat out of here.
All right, let me go get him. Fucking guy.
Fuck him. What the fuck Brian?
Where's he at?
(Door clicks open)
Dude, dude, he's fucked up.
What?
(Synth sting)
Ah, dud fuck that. He's done. He's done.
We got to. Come on, come on. Hurry up.
(Screaming) Oh, my god!
Get the fuck out of here!
What the fuck dude.
Holy shit.
Ahhhh... ahhhhh.
(Gurgling)
(Splat)
Oh, dude.
Oh, my god! Fucking, fucking crackhead.
He's a fucker.
Mmm.. Shouldn't have let your
fucking ass in here. (Thunk, thunk, thunk)
You fucking crackhead. Fuck.
(Squish of brains splattering)
(Synth sting)
Done deal.
Let's get the fuck outta here.
You got to go. Let's go, man.
Keys are in the car.
Okay.
(Screaming)
Ah, shit! (Zombies moaning)
Go, go, go go!
(Car starting)
(Car revs away)
(Car getting closer)
(Synth drone)
(Car door closes)
(Hatch clicks shut)
Piece of cake.
(Door squeaks)
(Door clicks shut)
No alarm?
Okay.
(Emergency tone)
This is civil danger warning
effective nation wide.
Your attention is required.
All stations and cable systems
should transmit this emergency
notification message.
This is not a test.
The following emergency
message is transmitted at the request
of the United States government.
Whatever.
(Paper crinkles)
Don't fuck it up.
This will be easier then Chapman storage.
(Click)
(Punk rock on earphones)
(Punk rock gets louder)
Rhyme or riddle, impossible name
faking beauty and stay in the game
(Ominous synth drone)
(Door creaks open)
(Punk rock music continues)
every part of me is fighting to win
sin city, waiting for me
around the corner I'm begging to be
double trouble is leaning on me
next time you see me I won't
be the same oooo. Next time...
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock music)
Oooo. You'll see me shove for myself.
No beating down on someone else
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock music) no
way in hell I'm gonna die
leave me alone and I'll be fine
(Scary synth music)
(Faint punk music) (Toilet flushes)
(Punk music gets louder) next time
you see me I won't be the same
sin city I'm looking at you sin
city I'm looking at you. Sin city...
(Scary synth music)
(Punk rock continues) oooo, yeah
Ugh. Gnarly.
Explains no alarm code.
Where's the closet?
(Escalating scary synth
music) (Door creaks open)
(Heavy footsteps)
What the actual fuck.
(Zombie moaning)
Oh, hell no.
Don't fuck it up.
Fuck.
(Zombies heavy breathing)
(Zombie growling)
Uh!
Uh, yah, yah! (Hammer whack, whack, whack)
Fucking kidding me.
(Door slams)
(Thunk, thunk) (Zombie squealing)
(Thunk)
(Champahne pops) (Women cheering)
It's exciting.
(Women chattering)
It's like it came so fast.
(Excited chatting and laughter)
Oh, girl you nasty!
Ooo, I did not.
Hey, now where is that stripper?
Oh, oh, oh, oh, you know what?
We're all out of champagne.
(Acoustic alt rock guitar music)
(Jeans swish with footsteps)
Welcome to wiseguys. How may I help you?
I'm going to take some
of those cones over there.
How are those? How do they hold the joint?
They're pretty good.
They're good. Okay, cool.
You know, I'm going to take
one of those green blazers.
The green.
The green.
Yeah, the green.
Green ones mine.
And I'm going to take...
How about those? Rhinos?
The horny rhino 6000.
Those work pretty good?
Well, we got some strongers ones too.
Stronger ones?
You want a stronger one?
Sure. Why do you think I have ed?
All right, let's see what we got here.
You need it for the show tonight. Okay.
I found these on a homeless person.
I'm just fucking Sam speeder.
You know what I mean.
I'm not going to use it on
fucking homeless people.
It'll make things worse.
Don't say anything about women.
I'm going to end up there with a shitty
fucking gig that I got here, you know?
So let me look at what I got.
Is that all you want?
Yeah, I guess so.
Trust me, don't get old, you
know, doing b-movie stuff,
and now I'm reduced to a
fucking cheap old fucking stripper.
Yeah, yeah. Don't get old.
All right, you guys take a quick pay.
All right, that's on tax right.
It'll be tax if you use the
card. Tax, Jesus fucking Christ.
Okay, what do I expect, it's San Pedro.
Okay.
We're all good.
- All right.
No receipt. Yep.
We're out of paper anyway.
All right.
Have a good one.
(Ominous music)
Hey get the fuck out of here you tweaker.
God dammit, you stupid fucking cunt.
Fucking bitch.
Get the fuck out of here.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
I told ya already.
Get the fuck out of here.
You come in here every fucking day.
Back the fuck up.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Back up.
Back the fuck...
The stripper is here.
You gotta get the door.
Oh, oh. Yay!
Oh, oh, it's Amy!
Always late girl. Dammit Amy.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god, you guys.
Oh, my gosh.
Like, the traffic was so bad.
Like, there were people, like, running
in the middle of the fucking street.
Like, I don't know
what's going on out there.
What? I'm so sorry.
Yeah, it's not even noon yet.
I don't. Yeah, I know. I don't know.
Is there like some sports
game or something?
No, the playoffs are done.
Well I don't fucking do sports.
So let's do this party!
Yeah, yay, yeah. All right Veronica!
Woohoo!
Ah, fucking ugly cunt. I'm
going to get rabies after this here.
What the fuck?
Jesus, fucking.
(Synth sting)
Last time I'm coming to this fucking town.
Fucking shit.
Oh, my god.
This food is so good.
Thank you so much for inviting me.
Your friends are so nice.
Of course I invited you.
Let's raise our glasses
and toast to Veronica.
Of course! Yes!
I'm a little nervous. I don't like
talking in front of people, but.
I promise to keep this short so we can
hurry up and get our party on. Woo!
I want to thank you
all for being able to celebrate
my best friend Veronica.
On your last day as a single lady.
Yeah, I never thought
she'd get married again.
Again? Yeah.
You don't know about number one? Shit.
How many times have you been married?
But today is a special day no matter what.
It's a special day.
The final farewell to the Vixen, Veronica.
Tomorrow she'll be an
official reformed cougar.
Oh, I'll just leave these are my final
parting words you can
bestow into your wedding day.
And she walks down the
aisle toward her beloved Rob.
She'll be all smiles knowing
she's given her last blow job.
Oh my god!
(Laughter0
cheers!
It's called a blow job because
it's fucking work, man.
Let me tell you, if I'm doing it right.
It's fucking work. Yeah, you
could get lockjaw from that.
It's no fun.
I mean, so I heard
are you talking from experience?
Ladies, I just wanted to say.
Thank you so much for being here.
You are my closest friends,
and this means so much to me.
I just love you ladies so
much. Like, thank you so much.
(Knock on door)
(Women squealing) Oh my god!
I feel giddy!
Whoa! Yay! (Excited screaming)
I'm excited to be here. Yes, she is!
Whoa, woo, woo!
So, how's it goin'? Woo, yay!
Break me off a piece of that.
Yeah.
Well, first and foremost, ladies,
tell me where a bathroom that
I got to get into my dental floss
you're all into oral hygiene.
Ha, ha, ha. It's over there, hurry up!
Oh, my god! Oh, gosh.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my gosh. He's so fine!
Fuck oh my god!
(Excited conversation)
You better fuck that
dude. Oh my god, I can't.
Oh, says you can't fuck.
You're not married yet.
Yeah, right.
Okay.
(Excited conversation)
Right here and now.
Damn. I hope you brought
a lot of fucking money.
(Laughter)
I'll drink to that.
Whee!
(Snorts)
Fucking homeless bitch.
Red scratch fever. Fuck.
Ugh.
Oh. How am I going to go out like this?
(Drawer scrapes)
Maybe... ah, good.
Ah, fucking homeless piece of shit.
Why? Fuck
ok, inside.
Just go in to get these
fucking tips. I'm booking my ass out.
These fucking bitches better
leave me a good tip.
Oh, my god! Woo!
Woo! Wow! Yoohoo! Alright!
Okay, now I'm giving. You a tip so
you have credit here.
All of you here.
So you can get started.
Yes! Alright!
Oh, woohoo!
(Sexy music starts) Woo! Yeah!
(Cheering)
Take it off! Take it off!
Take it off! Take it off!
Woohoo!
Whoa!
Woo! (Cat calls)
Come on!
Yeah! Are we having fun!
Woo! Come on baby!
Oh, my gosh.
Oh my god! You got anything in there?
Wow! Yeah!
Snap it!
(Laughter and screams)
Oh, whoa
woohoo!
Oh, you know you want it.
Oh, oh, oh,
Shake it!
Woo!
Wow!
Yeah! Take it off!
Shake it! Give it to her!
It's her party! Shake it! Shake it!
Woohoo!
It's too much!
Oh, my god!
Yeah! Woo!
Alright!
Wow!
Come on beat her!
Right on!
(Laughter)
Yeah!
Get naked!
Woo!
Woo (clapping)
Yeah!
Yes!
All right, all right ladies.
Got any more tips for my coin purse?
(Laughter)
Better not be just a stack
of dimes in there, buddy.
I'll give you a stack of dimes.
I'll smack a little all over your face.
Whoa!
Wow, woo!
Woo! Yay!
Oh, my god.
That was incredible.
Oh, thanl you ladies.
I hope that was a six orgasm dance for you.
(Laughter)
Well ladies, oh my god!
As much as I'd like to do
more magic Mike with you.
You guys are all lovely
magic milfs.
Woo! I'll take it!
That's right! Yeah!
(Excited chatter) I'd like
to bite off a piece of your...
Hmm, rrrrr, grrr.
Hey, are you there?
What's she doing?
Shit. I didn't tip you enough.
What can you do for $100?
Carmen! I can do a lot for
100 bucks baby. Come on.
Carmen... Looks like
cramen is getting some action.
I do a lot for 100 bucks.
Mmm. (Smooching noises)
Horny bitch (Giggles) (Butt slap)
What do you want the
pump and grind? Mmm hmm.
Yeah?
Ahhh.
Mmmm. Mmmm.
(Synth sting) Ahhh. Oww.
What the fuck are you doing?
Stop it.
(Screams)
(Knock on door)
Carmen!
Quit being such a fucking ho.
Come on.
Ha, ha. She probably does
have a dick in her mouth.
Let me see what the fuck's going on.
Oh, my god, what the
fuck are you doing to her?
What the fuck! Ahhh, ahhhh.
(Screams) (Synth sting)
Arghh!
Oh my god! (Screaming)
(High pitched screams)
Go to hell!
(More screaming)
(Synth sting)
Uh.
Ahhhh. Ahhhh.
Huh, huh, huh.
Help! Nahhh, ha, na.
Oh, no, no.
Ahhh, ha, ha.
Yum, um, num. Get the fuck off of me!
Oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, ya, ha, ha.
Oh, oh.
Oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh,
better her than me.
Uh, uh.
But, help, stop!
Go, no!
Ahhh, ha, ha.
Gahh, ha, ha.
Ahhh, ha. Uh.
(Ominous synth drone)
(Heavy footsteps)
(Zombie scream)
Welcome everybody to conspiracy corner
I'm your host John, today
we have a treat for you.
We give you the conspiracy
theories as they come live.
So today we got a special treat for you.
The living dead has taken over
Las Vegas and now the entire world.
I just watched a YouTube video
just lie rally like 5 minutes ago,
and I keep my notes here, so I'm looking
down I'm not writing a script I promise.
The governor has issued martial
law forcing us to stay inside our homes.
Hmmm. Does this sound familiar?
Maybe 2020?
Flesh eating zombies.
He scores these zombies.
Whatever you want to
call them at this point?
Created by the elite.
The illuminati
the cabal
whatever you want to
call them. Hilary Clinton?
Whatever you want to
call them at this point.
I don't care what you want to
call them. They are zombies. Ok?
They were created by the
government and Hollywood.
Is this population control?
I think so.
If these things bite you,
you will become one of them.
And you will start feasting
on the rest of the living.
Including babies.
Wake up america! Before it's too late.
(Zombie screams)
I don't know what you have,
but I don't want it.
I need you to get the fuck away.
I don't want your syphilis bitch.
I will shoot you.
(Gunfire)
(Thud)
Grrrr
grrrr
fuck.
(Whack)
Ahhhh.
Uhhh, uhhh. (Door handle rattles)
(Heavy breathing)
(Click)
Shit! (Scary synth music swells)
(Crash)
(Irregular footsteps)
(Klong)
Dammit, Karen.
I've got you now.
Die! (Squish)
(Crickets)
(Beep emergency tone)
(Static)
I am pastor Donald.
The apocalypse is upon us.
And it's your fault that it is.
You removed prayer from schools.
You allow people to abort babies
after they are born, using their umbilical
cords to strangle them, to murder them.
You are allowing boys to become
girls and girls to become boys.
You voted for the wrong president.
These are the things that have upset god.
These are the things.
That make him upset.
And now it is his wrath.
He's taking sinners
and turning them against
the christians.
The undead are now attacking
good wholesome christians.
And it's your fault.
It's your fault.
The blue haired, the green haired,
the rainbow coalition.
You've done all the things to
make sure that the world will
come to an end.
You will anger the almighty.
And now Las Vegas.
Sin city
is now doomed because of you.
That's right.
Because of you.
You didn't read the Bible.
You didn't listen to what we had to say.
You didn't give
enough money to the church.
Instead, you bought
medication, you bought groceries.
You got gas for your car.
But that money could
have gone to the church.
That money could have helped
with getting you into heaven.
And now, look.
The apocalypse is on us
and it's your fault.
Are you going to go to heaven?
I don't think so.
Because of your activities.
Who knows now?
Who knows if you're going to heaven?
I don't.
Do you?
All I have to say is pray.
Just pray.
Vegas is doomed.
The country is doomed.
The world is doomed
because you went against god.
(Emergency beep tone)
(Static)
(Ominous music)
(Boom)
(Bang)
Grrr, nah.
Yah.
(Whack) Yah!
Duh, uh. Uh. (Thud, thud)
Yuh. (Thud)
(Soothing synth tones)
(Harsh synth sting)
Ahhh!
Nom, nom, nom. (Squish)
This is ktnv 13 serving
the city of Las Vegas.
We are interrupting our program to
deliver an emergency alert system message.
Please stand by.
(Beep, beep, beep)
(Emergency tone)
The following message is transmitted
at the request of the Nevada state
emergency management agency.
This is not a test to all
residents receiving this broadcast.
Lock all your doors
immediately and stay indoors.
In several American cities,
there have been reports of
rioting, mass panic and explosions.
The 911 hotline is now
operating with limited capacity
due to the high volume of calls.
If you have any information
and or sightings, please contact
the Nevada state central
dispatch at 317692588.
(Ominous synth music)
(Upbeat acoustic guitar alt rock)
So how was your night last night?
Okay.
Let me tell you, ladies
about Chad last night.
Chad, that's a new name.
Have we heard that name before?
No, I just met him online. Oh, okay.
Hold up.
Did you meet him on tinder?
Hinge, farmers only? It was hinge. Okay.
Quite a respectable app.
Yeah, that's good. We can work with that.
We like that. Nice and safe.
We met in a public spot.
Okay, good.
Did you like take you out anywhere nice?
- He did.
He took me to this really
nice Italian restaurant.
Oh, I like Italian. That's good.
And did he pay?
He did. Good.
Princess treatment.
Yeah, exactly. I don't settle for less.
No kidding.
You already know.
Okay. Like, are you still...
Aren't you still doing that diet?
I am. So, yeah, I was.
That's okay. I didn't get to eat that much.
What, like a lettuce here?
Grass there?
Yeah. Um, I'm.
I had a dessert.
That's better.
He was.
He was very cool.
And he was teaching
me this new thing, right?
So I was pretty much crying
the whole dinner about um
how I couldn't eat any food.
Yeah. Uh, huh as I would.
So he taught me this trick.
Oh, okay. Tell us more.
So we incorporated the
food into the bedroom.
Oh, okay. A three course meal.
I see.
I like that. Well kind of.
It was just bacon.
Just bacon? Okay. It's my favorite food.
Yeah. Yeah.
So, did you, like, fried
up together and eat it?
And just watch a movie or
something? Knid of. Kind of?
Okay.
Hold up. What's going
on here? What happened?
Give us the details. We
need all of it right now.
So I had this, bacon
and I just kept it in my throat, like,
the whole time that we were fucking.
Isn't it like greasy.
Didn't it like. Uh, yeah.
It was so good.
It was so tasty.
Okay, but it was great
because I didn't have to eat it.
It was just there in my
throat the whole time.
It was so hot. Yeah.
And, like, we just sitting there,
like, or was he fucking you?
Oh, yeah.
He was fucking, you? Miss bad.
Which hole? You're wild.
Okay, you already know.
Know what? Back door.
Oh, my god.
Like, wow.
Where did you even.
Like I said, he treated me like a Princess.
I gave him the royal treatment.
Oh, I swear.
Oh, my goodness. And what happened?
Did you just, like, end up
eating the bacon after or what?
Well, no. So what you do
is you pull it out at the end.
That's a waste.
When you guys are like finishing?
Mmm, hmm.
And he yanked it out and
my ass clinched really hard.
Oh, my god, girl, we came so hard.
My goodness.
This is wild.
I love it.
Apparently it's called a wolf bagging.
Wolf bagging? I've never
heard of it. Never heard. Right.
Where did you learn this?
- I know.
I thought I knew everything and
this guy was teaching me new tricks.
Okay, well, okay.
I love that. And you're
going to see him again.
I am going to wait
a couple days, you know,
play hard to get. There you go.
Yeah. Okay. Real question, though.
What does he do fo work?
Uhh.
Oh, okay.
He's a farmer.
Oh, my god. Get out of here.
Are you kidding me? What's
up with you and farmers?
I swear.
No wonder you use the bacon.
I know he probably learned
it on the farm, like, oh,
I have some hogs going to kill them
and just fry up to bacon and see what
we can do with it.
God.
What can I say they're freaks.
They're good to the animals.
I mean, true that.
He has manners.
Okay. Have you ever dated a farmer?
No. Okay, good.
And I don't want to now. I know. I...
Like.
Well, good. More for me.
I respect that. That is.
And I love that for you.
But I could never like I need money.
I don't need greasy, dirty hands.
All right, well, I'll take the family,
man, and you take the money.
And then best of both worlds.
When I have my mansion,
you guys can live in it.
Exactly. I love that.
Oh, my god. We're all going
to live together in your mansion.
Yes. We could, like, have a whole thing.
It will be so much fun.
But, like, don't worry.
I got us all covered.
Hey, Ronnie, I really appreciate
you coming out today, man.
Of course. My pleasure.
When I got the message for you, you
wanted me to come and join you and
help you out in a pinch.
I was honored man. Great I
need someone solid on my team.
Thank you. Thank you for considering me.
You know, I have to share
the same views you have on,
you know, the problems with our community.
Yes, you know what...
With the crime and the vagrants,
it's fucking mess, you know?
Well, you know, here's my
philosophy the way I see it.
The vagrancy is kind of like
a scourge to our community.
It's like, um
a plague, if you will.
And people like you and me, we're like.
We're like the vaccines. There you go.
How do you like that? I like that.
- Yeah.
Maybe we'll use that on the page. Yeah?
That'll get us noticed.
By all the hot chicks!
Oh, hey, I wasn't even
thinking about that angle.
Also, I've been thinking about
some names for our page okay.
What do you got? Well, let me run
a by, you know, see what you think.
How about beat city street sweepers?
That's kind of cheesy.
No. Yeah.
Well, I got another one to
kind of more serious about. Um,
let's see.
Windows into the homes of the homeless?
That's kind of long. I
don't know what else.
Okay, well, how about we shorten
it to windows with dirk and rod?
I like that we use their name
in there. That's a good thing.
Our name isn't Neil and Bob.
Yeah, right. That's a good one.
I got one more about encampment raid
the no mooch motel, vagrants check in.
We check them out. Right. Right.
Okay, I like that. For sure.
Speaking to checking them out.
Wasn't there in the cabin
you were talking about?
Yeah, it's down over here.
There's a bunch of
homeless shit over here, man.
Okay, let's go check it out.
Okay. I'm with you.
Okay.
Crazy enough
let's not even talk
about in n out right now.
Yeah, I totally forgot.
You're on a diet. Oh, god.
When are you off of it?
I'm so bored with it. Right?
You trust me?
Did you hear that? Shhh.
It's over here.
Just take it a look.
Hey, you brought binoculars?
Dying is a motherfucker.
You didn't tell me I would
have brought something.
Good thing I brought this.
The hell are you going to
do that? See a flying cow?
Of course I probably could.
I got a pretty good view down there.
Hey, you see that guy?
You recognize that guy? You do?
Yeah. He's the king of the encampments.
His name is homeless
Harry. I got a file on him.
Okay, let's go check this out. Okay.
What do you want me to do?
That get rid of that
thing and I'll film it.
Okay. Let's go.
(Slurping and chomping)
Hey.
Are you okay?
I used to always go
investigate these situations.
I'm a capricorn. What
do you expect. Oh, boy.
Come on, let's go check it out.
Yeah, it's probably like,
this is going to be fun.
It's going to be like a coyote or
something. It's going to be fun.
Oh, yeah.
I love. Coyotes.
Great.
Are you ok?
(Footsteps) What the fuck?
Come don't hang back on us.
I swear
we're all in this together.
(Slurping and crunching)
Ahhh! Oh, my god!
Oh, god. Fuck
(screams)
Oh god! Oh god!
Fuck!
(Heavy ominous music)
(Footsteps dragging on gravel)
Yeahhhh.
Oh, shit, oh fuck. No, no, no!
(Scraming and crying)
(Quiet footsteps)
It's over this way.
Come on over here.
I'm right behind you, dude.
What the fuck? What the
hell is going on over there?
Fuck!
(Synth sting)
What the fuck are you doing?
What the fuck bro?
No, no, he's coming right at
us bro. Jesus Christ that's gross.
Oh, fuck let's get out of here man.
Come on. Fuck.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Fuck this bro. Fuck this (Gunshots)
Holy shit!
Shoot 'em in the brain!
Okay (gunshot)
(Squish)
Oh, fuck. Fuck that.
Come on, let's go, bro. Fuck.
(Background small talk)
Kick their ass... Bullshit.
That team sucked but we still lost.
Going to the bar?
Yeah.
Whose down for goig to the bar after this?
I think we all need one after that game.
Yeah. Okay. I don't know.
I'd rather have a cup of bong hits
myself. (Gunfire) Oh, shit! Whoa!
Is that gunfire? No that
sounded like fireworks.
No, that was gunfire. I know
what that shit sounds like.
Sounded like gunfire.
I'm thinking gunfire myself.
Where did it come from
over there man. I can't tell.
Yeah, that was gunshots.
Where did it come from?
Right up there.
I think it's that way. I
got an echo in here, man.
I heard a reverb off of
the canyon there oh, shit.
Help!
Oh shit! Rick!
Rick, help me!
Rick.
Oh, god.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, fuck! Run!
What the fuck is this?
(Panting)
Oh, shit.
They got him man.
Oh, dude, they took a bite
out of Tony. What the fuck.
Dude, what the fuck was that guy?
I've never seen shit like that before.
Yeah, never seen shit
like that before. Scumbag.
Was thatt some psycho homeless guy or what?
You got a signal? Ain't got shit.
Fuck signal.
I don't either. I didn't even bring
my cell phone. I left it in the car.
What do we do? Nothing.
We get back to the car.
We got to get the fuck out of here.
All right, let's go.
Ah, fuck! More of them!
Watch out for. Stupid.
Get the fuck outta here.
Dude.
Fuck. Come on.
Get the fuck off me.
(Zombies moaning)
Holy shit. There comes somebody.
Where did you girls come from?
Who are you?
It doesn't matter.
We just saw two people get eaten by people.
Our buddy just got fucked up.
They took a chunk out of him.
Do you guys got a car around here?
Where? How far?
We've been running everywhere.
I think we're just close up here.
We got a car that's like 5 minutes away.
We got to get there and
get the fuck out of here.
Find, find the police or
do something. I don't know.
Let's get out of here.
Yeah. Hey, I can't run no more.
I'm going to piss myself.
No way. I'm going to take
a piss before we leave.
Just give me a sec,
okay? Make it quick, bro.
Fuck.
All right.
Hey I'm going to go check up on him man.
Alright. Is there any people up that way?
Fuck dude.
I hope it's 5 minutes away.
Tony got fucked up man.
Hey, man.
Thanks for coming to watch my back.
Yeah, I drank a 12 pack while
we played that game, man.
Hurry up man we got to
get the fuck outta here.
Oh, dude, I got to go
or I'm gonna fucking piss myself.
(Synth sting)
Hey Rick! What? Rick!
Rick! What?
Rick!
Fuck.
Oh, ow! Oh. Fuck!
Oh, oh (Zombies moaning)
Well, fuck, man.
When he gets back to here, we got
to boogie. Get the fuck out of dodge.
Yeah.
Fuck. Oh, fucking run! What the fuck?
Oh, shit. Run (Girls scream)
Shit, there's more of them.
How many are there dude?
(Gunfire)
(Zombies moaning)
Nailed her! (Hand slap)
Good job. Get the fuck
outta here bro. Oh, fuck.
You know where the car is?
I think it's about another 200 yards away.
Yeah.
(Synth sting) (Screaming) Oh, shit!
Oh, fuck let's get out of here.
(Screaming)
(Zombie munching) (Gasping)
Uhhh.
Fuck there's more man hurry up.
Hurry up.
Oh, come on, oh, fuck man.
Take a break man. Fuck the women.
Man they're everywhere
dude. What are we going to do.
Hey dude you got any tissue? No man.
I think I shit myself a little bit.
Don't worry about it right now man.
Oh, fuck. No, no, no.
(Gunshots)
Hey man! (Distant sirens)
Oh, oh.
(Zombies moaning)
(Suspenseful music)
All right.
How much farther to the car?
You got about 50 yards
that way around the corner.
There's a shit load of them down there man.
They're all over. You're killing
me man. You're killing me.
Which way are we going to go?
The car's that way.
Ii don't know man. Let's
get out of here this way.
We're fucked man. Oh, shit! (Synth sting)
Fucking run! (Screaming)
Arghhh!
(Heavy breathing and panting)
Oh, fuck. Oh, my god.
What the fuck. We got to get out of here.
You got a car? I do, but it's
the way the fuck down there.
Shit. And all those freaks are up there.
What the fuck is that?
(Gunshots)
Oh, hey, man.
Hey, hey. We need help.
Who the fuck are you?
We were just playing softball.
We ran across these girls.
All right, we're trapped.
I was trying to get to my car.
The car is in the paking lot.
Well, you're kind of fucked here.
They're swarming all over the place. Oh,
fuck. The parking lot is teeming with them.
Jesus Christ. They're all over the place.
There! (Gunshots)
Fuck dude, run! Run, run, run!
(Zombies moaning)
Oh fucking a.
Oh, shit.
(Gunshots)
Oh, there ain't no way I'm going to
become one of those mother fucking things.
Ain't no fucking way.
(Gunshot)
(Zombies moaning)
Yarghhh.
Come on!
The car's ahead.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
The car is back this way man.
Fuck it dude. They're all over the place.
They're everywhere.
What are we going to do?
We gotta go some place. (Synth sting)
Guess we'll go back around the corner.
Oh shit!
What's the matter?
Oh shit! (Screamimg)
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Let's go! Shit!
Ahhhh! (Gunshot)
Ahhh!
Oh shit! Owww!
Arghhh!
Ahhhh!
(Ominous music)
Fuck.
There's more of these
bastards every goddamn second.
Fucking, they're everywhere, man.
Oh, fuck this shit. I'm out of here.
No, no.
It's dangerous to go.
Do not go by yourself.
Dude, you guys are on your
own. I'm outta here. No, no.
No!
What the fuck?
Fuck they're everywhere man.
One over there. (Gunshots)
Back this way.
Come on. Go!
Oh, my god.
All right,
I'm here.
If I can just get up to the street
and maybe flag somebody down.
Get out of...
Fuck. What the fuck? Fuck.
Fuck. Oh my god!
Jesus fucking Christ!
Yahhhh!
Man, these mother
fuckers are everywhere man.
It's scary around here.
They're all over the place.
(Screaming)
(Gunshot)
Fuck it what's going on? (Gun clicks empty)
Yeah.
Arghhh!
Oh, god.
Help!
Look there's more! Oh my god! Oh my god!
(Screamimg)
No! (Zombies moaning)
(Screaming)
(News theme music)
Terror, chaos, and fear gripped the nation.
Then a zombie
outbreak occurred, making everyone's
lives a little more difficult this week.
While some people living in
the downtown core of winnipeg
saw no difference in the matter.
The rest of the world is plunging into
complete anarchy and lawlessness.
Supply chains have been disrupted.
Politicians have disappeared
to the underground bunkers and even the
Internet is going in and out of service.
Mika stone
reporting live from a safer location.
With me, I have to comment
world renowned billionaire
and virologists Bill Gates.
Bill Gates.
What do you have to comment
on the current situation?
Well, I can assure you that
none of this came from a lab.
We have scientists working
around the clock looking at all
the data to make sure
that... (Zombies moaning)
(Maching gun fire)
(Zombies gurgling) (Static)
(Screaming)
(Zombies hissing)
(Whack) What we got to get out of here.
I know how to stop this thing
but you're going to have
to come with me right now.
There aren't a lot of humans left.
(Zombies growling)
(Screaming) Help! Someone help!
(Screaming)
Ya! Ya! Ha!
(Slurping and munching)
It was at this moment he knew
he fucked up.
Yaaaa! Arghhh!
(Static)
(Emergency tone)
(Heavy synth rock)
(Acoustic guitar alternative rock)
(Scary synth rock)