Boarders (2024) s01e01 Episode Script
One of Us
This programme contains some
scenes which some viewers may find
upsetting and strong language
Hello? You all right?
He stinks. He smells so bad!
Do you want some champagne,
maybe warm you up a little bit?
Get off! Don't be ungrateful.
This is 110 a bottle! Just a smidge.
It's 110! Just a smidge! Come on.
CORK POPS, CHEERING
I have a journalist
coming to talk to us
about our new scholarship programme
and he'd very much like
to interview you, too.
He'll want to talk about
your charity, of course,
and get your take
on how St Gilbert's
may possibly have fallen behind
other public schools
in giving access to
excellent education to all,
but how I tirelessly sought out
a charity like yours
to give these scholarships
to talented students
from disadvantaged backgrounds.
Verbatim, or can I put it
in my own words?
Guessing I shouldn't
mention the video.
SHOUTING
I mean, you knew it was bad when
even The Daily Mail called it
"The Great British Shame".
But, hey, if a few of my kids get
an opportunity to attend a place
like this, I'm happy to run with
whatever narrative you guys want.
Polo?
Hey, yo! What?
Hey, come on back, you little pig!
Or what?
We have high standards
at St Gilbert's.
We expect every new pupil
to uphold them.
All right, come here, bro!
Our students are required to be
confident and courageous,
not to mention committed.
HE GRUNTS
They must be tenacious
Excuse me, do you mind if I put
this poster on your notice board?
Sure, what is it?
Just about how we need to stop
hipster coffee shops like these
from gutting the life and soul
out of black neighbourhoods.
Creative,
discerning,
cultured,
with an eye for detail
and a real appreciation of the arts.
Omar!
Students must be hard-working
You want to be gangster, eh?
Smoking the drugs
and popping the caps in my ass!
I said Nigeria or boarding school!
He worked and applied himself
and got in! What did you do?
Exactly! So pack your bags, uh!
So pack your bags, uh!
..and of course, enterprising
Look, I done told you,
I ain't paying for these kicks!
Look, the stitching's falling apart!
..knows his stuff, yes.
I learnt Farsi so I don't get
robbed by lickle pum-pums like you!
Now put my tings inna de bag!
Dickhead!
SHE SPEAKS FARSI
They wouldn't be anything else.
I don't have to go
if you don't want me to, you know?
What? Why are you trying to
get out of buying me a Porsche?
That's not how it works, D.
People go private school
to get rich, right?
ListenCaleb, just call me
if you need me, yeah?
I'll call you when I decide
what kind of Porsche I want.
Ah!
Hey, tap out! Tap out! Tap out!
Never!
Jaheim!
Black plastic bag?
You couldn't find a suitcase?
It's fine, man. We're good, Grandma.
You bathe?
Yeah. You have pants?
Yes, Grandma. Hmm. Dem clean?
Yes, Grandma!
Don't forget your manners,
and don't get into trouble, OK?
I won't. I promise.
OK.
Brother, I'll catch you
..in a bit, bro. Yeah.
Call you when I'm there. Mm-hm.
Take care, yeah?
MUSIC: Amplify
by Guvna B and DarkoVibes
Yo, private school boy!
Represent us out there, you know?
Yeah? Send me one of them
posh white girls, yo.
A freaky one. Like you would know
what to do with it, brother!
Come on, now. Yo.
Yo, them posh boys
move mad too, you know?
Wanking in circles
over digestive biscuits.
Last one to bust has to eat it!
EXCLAIMS
Man, are you serious?
What's wrong with you, man?
See what weed has done
to this guy's brain, bruv?
Did I say me? You make everything
All right, listen, bro.
Why didn't you tell me
that you needed peas, fam?
Bro, come on now. I'm good, bro.
What do you mean, "Come on?"
Look at this, bro.
Nah, bro. It's good. Hold this.
Hold this, bro.
All right.
Make sure you don't
forget us, you know?
Remember, we made you
right here, you know?
Brother, you man are acting like
I'm going to war or something, bro.
You ain't comin' back.
Is he comin' back?
Little waffin.
Leaving ends.
Aight.
Hold it down out there, bro.
Show them! Aight. Aight, man.
Yeah? In a bit.
All right.
Later, J.
What the hell you got in there?
Why you so inna?
Help me with this one, please.
SHE KISSES TEETH
Yeah! You all right, Jaheim?
I'm great. How are you?
Looks like you need
a little bit of a trim.
Umwhat's that?
Me and Caleb got in
a little play-fight, innit?
Lickle man caught
a lucky right hand.
Look, I'm here like you wanted me.
Look, if you think
you're doing this for me,
you might as well go home right now.
Yeah.
Aight.
Man like Jaheim, you know.
What you tellin' me?
I'm good. Good, yeah? Yes, sir.
Where's Femi? No way that little
African decided he ain't coming.
He said his parents are
going to drop him there.
OK.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh!
Can I help you?
I'm genuinely just shocked
that you accepted your place.
You're meant to be
"Down with the establishment!"
But you're accepting a scholarship
to a fee-paying school?
How else am I supposed to
get a seat at the table, Toby?
What? I had to fight just to
get on this scholarship ting
meant for only those with dicks.
Hey!
It's not our fault underprivileged
black boys are "in" at the moment.
I lie?
So why are you here, Toby?
A good education, obviously.
You know, broaden my horizon.
And
..pumzy.
Shock!
Omar?
Stupid not to, right?
I mean, it's got art studios,
three libraries, a theatre.
Yeah, yeah. We all read
the same brochure, my guy.
Plus, it's the home of PF Raisin.
PF Raisin? Yeah.
Who's that? He was a cartoonist.
Satirical kind of stuff,
you know, like really, really funny.
Apparently, there's like a secret
society, like, dedicated to him.
It'd be amazing if it were real
and I got to join it, you know?
Wow.
You're defo not gettin' any pumzy.
I think you mean dick. Oh, fire!
What do you reckon it'll be like?
I don't know.
Probably like our old schools.
More money, less metal detectors.
Do you hear that, Jaheim?
Less metal detectors.
Ahaha! Shut up!
Whatever it's like
..I say we just go
and enjoy ourselves.
Oh, hundred! Listen, I said
it before and I'll say it again,
you have not lived the full
private school experience
if you don't come back with
a STI and a coke habit.
What the fuck? It's true!
Sit down.
DOOR CLOSES
I want you to remember that
this wasn't an open invite
to everybody and anybody
from the ends.
Sorry. It's just "ends".
I encouraged you to come to
my after-school club because I saw
incredible talent that wasn't being
nurtured at your individual schools.
That talent that you continue
to work hard at
is what got you your scholarships
at St Gilbert's.
No-one will know that
better than you.
Don't be who they expect you to be.
This is mad.
Wait, is that Femi?
This is how we're living?
Femi! Nah. Femi! Yo!
He can't hear you, guys.
GUS: OK, time to go.
Welcome to your new home.
Yeah!
Yeah! Aight, this is serious.
This? Serious!
You OK? Yeah, yeah.
Femi!
Hey
Those are the ones
you need to stay away from!
You worked too hard
to waste this chance.
Make me proud, OK?
If you must know,
I'm shotting 'em, innit?
These rich whities love
a road man trainer, you know.
You're an idiot.
All right.
It's important to look the part.
Is that going to stop them
from staring?
If they stare, stare back.
Hi! How you doing?
Gorgeous weather we're having.
WOMAN SIGHS
Let them know you belong.
All right, good luck. Go.
What, you're not coming with us?
What, you want me to hold your hand?
Look, you're prepped for this,
all of you, all right?
If you need me,
I'm just a call away.
But don't be callin' all the time.
Don't be popping off my phone!
All right, go on.
Good luck, good luck, good luck!
Go!
GENERAL CHATTER
Room allocation first, right?
Says here it's in the study hall.
Where is that?
Excuse me, do you know where the?
OK. Thanks, anyway.
We're all in Malton.
That's fun.
Please God, mixed boarding.
Bro, you're here
with Crispin, bro!
Crispin! Bet that's
one of them wet whities
that thinks he's black and that.
Yeah, he's going to get me
to line up his ginger fade
and spit bars on
his mixtape and that.
I think it's a little more
progressive than that.
Bro, I've already been
asked if I sell weed.
Serious, man?
Your girl is about to intro herself
to her new boarding ride or die!
Are you filming me?
Hi.
I'm Mabel.
It's so nice to meet you.
OK.
Apparently, we're in
the same boarding house.
Hilarious, right?
Yeah. LOL.
If you have any questions,
don't hesitate to ask.
I've been boarding
since I was seven.
I, like, barely
even know my parents.
Francois de Gange.
Oi, that's a mad name.
Hi, I'm Beatrix.
Oh, OK.
And, er, this is Florence.
Hi. Is it your first time boarding?
What makes you think that?
Your suitcase is a binbag, bro.
Well, if you need a tour or
anything, I'm really happy to help.
Thank you, Beatrix. Mm.
And if you need any help
from me with anything,
I'll be glad to do that.
Well, I've never seen a black penis
before, so there's that.
GIRLS SNIGGER
Bea!
Bro, D, this place a go be fire!
Hey.
Babes!
Maybe next time you could piss on me
to let everyone know I'm yours.
Hey, how you doing? Rupert.
You guys must be
the, er, scholarships.
What's your name? Jaheim.
Ja-what? Jaheim.
Jaheim. Yes.
So where you from?
My man said it like he's G-checking
me. For real. What's that, sorry?
Nothing. London joke.
You wouldn't get it.
London? Yeah. Nice. Which part?
Lewisham. Not so sure.
South London. Oh, like Brixton?
No, not like Brixton, no. We went
to go and see Stormzy in Brixton.
Oh, did you? Yeah. You know,
that's my cousin! Really?
Yeah! Yeah, yeah man.
So is Skepta and Giggs.
Wow. Small world. Uh-huh.
Should've used a bag for life.
See you around, boys.
Right, Mimsy, I think we've got
time to take one more photograph.
Why don't we take one under
the portrait of the founder?
If you can line up along there
Right, oh.
Maybe
The bruise.
Yes. Every new student takes one
for the newsletter.
OK, you ready?
Leah, turn Leah! Turn around.
Yes, right. Take a picture.
Jaheim actually got G-checked
by a brother called Rupert.
Brother, shut up, man.
His name is Rupert.
Separately, I should've banged him
in his flippin' face.
Big man ting, you should've.
How have we been here ten minutes
and you man are already warring?
It's him! And you, stop gassing him!
Oi, chill! Chill, bro!
I knew I recognised him. Look.
Eh! No No way. Oh, man.
Ah! And he's still here after that?
Yeah, you see? These rich guys,
they get away with murder.
Which is why you two shouldn't
be fucking with him.
HIGH-PITCHED: Ooh, first lecture
at St Gilbert's!
Listen, there's no just you,
you know. It's us.
So if you get in shit,
we're all fucked.
All right, let me
tell you something, yeah?
You need to stop thinking the worst
of me. I'm actually a delight.
Look, bun that.
There are more progressive ways
to sort shit out, you know?
We should start
an Afro-Caribbean Society.
BOYS GROAN
Power in numbers!
There's always drama round
the corner in places like these.
So we should've already been ready.
Listen, like I said,
I'm just here to shot two-two
trainers and shot two-two gyal.
Alie! Literally! Good luck
with that though, yeah? Yeah.
I'm rootin' for you.
Have you lot not watched Get Out?
It's not just a film, you know.
It's gospel.
That's how you man end up
in a sunken place.
GENERAL CHATTER
GIRLS WHOOP, LAUGH
Hi.
Um, which one of you is Abby?
I am.
I'm Leah. I thought I was
the only one.
Only one of what?
Hey, man.
Femi.
Mm. Ooh, brother.
Hey OK Er Oh, oh! OK!
THEY LAUGH
Oh, rah.
I wrote it myself.
Which programme?
It's called Deity?
That's cool, man.
Have you ever tried
using Silverscape?
Yeah, you see all that
glitchy stuff there?
It just irons out before you have
to go through a shitload of code.
Digestive?
Actually, you know what, bro?
I'm good.
CAMERA CLICKS
OK.
FEMI SIGHS
Um
..can I get a picture of you?
My mum wants a picture
of my roommate.
It's for my family WhatsApp group.
Oh, God, sorry.
Er No, no, no. Of course, mate.
OK.
Together would probably be less
weird, right?
Yeah. Right? Yeah. Yeah.
Uh, this guy! Yeah.
THEY LAUGH
This guy, yeah!
See you around.
"Stop silencing the gildem".
It's "gal dem".
Nice!
LAUGHTER
GENERAL CHATTER
Nah, I'll probably just head
to you like in ten minutes.
Hi. What's your name?
No, I don't want to talk to you.
SCREAMING
J
VIDEO STOPS
PHONE: The person you're calling
is unable to take your call.
Please leave a message
after the tone.
Hey, Mum. You're probably
at work or something.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've, um
..I've arrived all right. Um
..chat later.
HE SIGHS
ORGAN FANFARE PLAYS
BUZZ OF CONVERSATION
Hi!
What you doing?
GIRLS WHISPER
Oh, my God
SHE WHISPERS
..it's ridiculous.
Gilbertus numquam concedat!
ALL: Gilbertus semper duret!
I hope you enjoyed
the summer holidays.
Now as you are aware,
St Gilbert's has been
..under the spotlight.
But I'd like you all to know
that the school
is turning over a new leaf
and looking to the future.
And with that in mind,
I want you all to make sure
that our new students
in the Lower Sixth
are made to feel right at home.
I hope you enjoy your time here
..and that you wear
your uniform with pride.
Whoever you were before
doesn't matter.
You are a Gilbertine now.
QUIETLY: What the fuck?
Have you seen how they lined us up?
Sh!
Where's the other one?
Today's hymn is
Eternal Father, Strong To Save.
MUSIC STRIKES UP
# Eter #
BELL RINGS
Psst, big man.
You looking for some kicks?
Seriously, mate, fuck off.
How many have you sold?
Rome wasn't built in a day,
my friend.
And I don't think the Colosseum
was bought
from East Street Market
either. What are you doing?
OK, so I'm looking into the secret
society, The Raisinettes.
This is a floor plan
of St Gilbert's,
and this is the map
I got from the internet
from an unpublished
piece of work from Raisin
which I put on tracing paper,
and look.
Also, his last book was
called The Dormitory.
"Dormitory" is an anagram
for "dirty room".
Dirty room! Bins!
Big man, I beg you,
don't go rooting round the bins.
TEACHER: Everyone, settle down,
settle down! Look
Psst, Stormzy. Hey!
I heard you're
the man selling creps.
Yeah, yeah. What'd you need?
An ounce.
An ounce? Sh!
Hey, I'm good for it, all right?
Just bring it to Running of
the Balls. It's going to be mad!
An ounce?
WHISTLE BLOWS
Look alive, lads!
If you want to make the squad,
you work for it.
This is not a game for the weak.
This is the game of the gods.
That being said, it is
just a trial match, so take it easy.
WHISTLE BLOWS, BOYS SHOU
But I ain't never played before.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Come on!
Let's go!
MUSIC: In A Bag
by Leon Riley and Jamie Shield
Go on, Rupert!
APPLAUSE, WHISTLE BLOWS
I guess it wasn't
a sports scholarship?
Stop fucking around, Rupert!
Let's go!
Well, run, you dildo!
Get in there, lad!
That's impressive.
You never know who's watching.
Try fucking together rather
than each other.
Fuck, he's so yummy!
Stop dribbling, bitch!
I just want to gobble him up
and have him live in my tummy.
You are so fucking weird.
Oi, Florence! Beatrix! Abby!
If you could put
your tongues away
THEY YELL
What, so Florence your ting, yeah?
She's out of your league, mate.
She's more champagne
and cocktails, you know?
Less Red Stripe and Supermalt.
Speaking of champagne,
I saw that video.
Way to show the homeless, man.
That video is why you and your
charity case friends are here.
Surely a thank you is in order.
Pass the fucking ball, man!
WHISTLE
He's doing absolutely
brilliant there.
Did you see him?
Got to absolutely watch that.
WHISTLE
OK, lads!
Crouch!
Bind!
Set!
Fuck What the fuck?
What the fuck? Fucking dickhead!
Are you fucking dumb?
Who the fuck do you think you're..
Hey, hey, hey, you!
Yeah? Come on, then!
Get off my pitch! You, off my pitch!
You're embarrassing yourselves,
both of you!
INDISTINCT CELEBRATIONS
You were pratting around
the whole fucking time!
What the fuck was that?
My hand slipped
If you think you're untouchable,
you're not.
Our dad's just rich and he's done
bailing you the fuck out.
So unless you want to be
sent to the comp down the road,
stop acting like a fucking infant
and get your shit together!
All right, OK.
Ah!
Your little stunt brought him here,
and he made you
look like a right prick.
Fucking embarrassment.
BELL RINGS
CLOCK TICKS SOFTLY
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
Stand when the headmaster
enters the room.
HEADMASTER SIGHS
Day one, Mr Marsham.
Your personal statement.
I'd like you to read it.
Out loud.
"I'm writing to express my interest
in attending St Gilbert's College.
"I'm a bright, motivated
and well-rounded student
"with a strong academic record
and a passion for learning."
Now paragraph three.
"Opportunities like this
are rare for boys like me,
"especially where
"..from where I come from.
"If I were given this opportunity,
it would not only give me
"the education I need but also
the life skills that would allow me
"to help those I care about most,
"including my grandmother,
"my youngest brother Caleb
"and my mother."
What were you doing in there?
Listen, we did not sit through
three exams and two interviews
I know! I had to do it too!
Then why don't you act like it?
You don't even know what happened.
Yeah, but I know you, Jaheim,
and that's the problem.
Cool.
Bernard!
"Master" will suffice,
Miss Dulverton.
I'm not going to be
calling you Master.
Was there something specific?
It has already been
brought to my attention.
An unfortunate mistake.
And? And?
And the portrait is
going to be taken down.
My uncle could literally
scrap it for you for 30 quid.
That portrait, which depicts
the founder of the school,
has been here longer
than both you or I
Out with the old,
in with the new, right?
I'm sure you can find something
just as cheap looking,
yet inoffensive, online.
We're done here, Miss Dulverton.
We don't like the portrait.
None of us do.
May I suggest you spend less energy
on things you can't change,
and more on things you can.
For starters,
getting your acts together.
BELL RINGS
Something about it being here
longer than him or me,
like, that makes no sense to me.
He was like, "Oh, you can
call me Master." Is he good?
What'd that guy say?
"Running of the Bulls"? Mm.
That's what he said, yeah.
It's not actually bulls
though, right?
I mean, I wouldn't be surprised.
This place is mad extra. Mm.
Oh, it's like that, yeah?
Yeah, it's like that.
Leah, man. What?
Nah, it's calm. It's calm.
Let her be angry.
I'll check you lot later, innit?
Goodbye.
That's Azim's car, man.
He always parks there.
PHONE RINGS
Yo! What you tellin' me, my guy?
Man's been waiting for
your call, bruv! Who's that?
It's the dark skinned Akala,
you get me? Scholarship boy!
East End,
when we comin' to visit you, bro?
You think I'm going to let you lot
near here, bruv, cause mayhem?
Pfffft. Man's embarrassed
of the mandem.
He's getting, like, uptown now.
What you sayin', you good, though?
Man spoke to Grandma,
spoke to Caleb.
He's blessed.
I've got him, yeah?
Bro, you sure you're good though?
DOOR OPENS
Um, yeah. Man, I got to go.
Umstay safe, innit?
Why you look so stressed, fam?
You sayin' this school got
you down bad like that, yeah?
Bro, it's minor, innit?
Just long days, innit.
Bro, I hear that.
Miss Kaneko's been
griding me hard, fam.
And not in the way I like, either.
That's your fault for
doing Japanese, no?
Omaeno kaachan suttoke.
What does that mean?
It's Japanese for
"Suck your mother".
Come man, shot one time.
Say nothing.
You asked for it, innit?
Wait, what? You still
shotting them trainers? Yeah.
I was even going to try flingin'
'em out at this bulls ting.
But, bro, exploiting these
little white yutes
Hey, you know
if you ever need money for a trim,
you just have to ask, you know?
Bro.
I was working a weekend job to
help my mum around the house, fam.
But now that I'm here
..I'm just tryin'
to sort some cash to send back.
It's minor, though.
Well, I mean
If you ever need money, people
still think you're a drug dealer.
You're a dickhead, brev.
You sayin' you comin' later, yeah?
Nah, man. Allow dat.
What? Bro, you don't
know that bitch!
This girl is on you, fam!
Come on, man.
She's too much drama.
I don't need any more of that.
So, what, you just going to
stay in your room till graduation?
You're a size ten, I lie? Yeah.
Hold that, big man.
What ones are these?
Designer, man.
Top of the line.
Listen though, we're linkin'
at the statue at eight.
Make sure you're there. And don't be
late, fam. Say nothing. In a bit.
BEAT PLAYS
Oi-oi, come on!
Let's have it.
Urgh
Mate, what you doing?
I'm giving you a six pack.
Well, clearly you can't
fucking count.
Go on. Two, four, six, eight
Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tobes, no more alcohol
for this prick.
Some people have eight.
Like, if you're really ripped.
But who in their right mind
is going to believe
that I have an eight pack.
Who's going to believe
you have a six pack?
HE LAUGHS
Oh, OK.
OK, Scholarship, you're up!
No, no, no, no!
I'm happy to just watch.
Don't you want to be a Rah'scal?
A what?! I don't call us that.
That's what we're called!
Er
THEY LAUGH AWKWARDLY
No, it's a stupid name and we sound
like a bloody bunch of twats!
No, we're Rah'scals,
and a Rah'scal always runs.
What are you running from?
It's not actual bulls?
THEY GUFFAW
Or are you?
I'mI'mfucking confused!
CLATTERING AND GRUNTING
SIGHS ANGRILY
GROWLS
Who the fuck keeps coming into
my room and taking my stuff? Hm?
SCOFFS
You need a comb?
Got some hair products too.
You ever had your hair in box
braids? I think they'd look so dope.
Just comb it back.
OK
Right, I'm going to need you to
hold this for me as well.
Thank you.
What is it?
Some stuff I got from the market.
It burns, but that just
means it's working. What?
I'm playing with you.
No, I've got an aunt in Atlanta.
She sends this stuff over
for me and my mum.
Never met her.
Honestly,
it works too well to be legal.
So
..what are you doing now?
I'm just braiding it.
You've literally got the same
texture as my cousin's.
I feel like your curls
could be way more defined. Mm.
I don't really know what to do.
Don't worry. I'll teach you.
Really? Yes.
I've literally brought
my whole bathroom here.
I'm sure we'll find
something that works.
Yeah, no. I've seen that.
THEY LAUGH
FLUSHING, DOOR UNLOCKS
Man said designers and they're
already ripping? Joke, man.
Always playin' about.
Oh! Uh!
What the fuck is that?!
Fucking dick!
Keep filming, keep filming,
keep filming!
Oh, oh! Whoa! What you doing?
What you doing?
URINATING
That's enough!
No, no, no! What the fuck?
What you doing?! Fuck off!
Let's go.
SPITS
Piece of shit.
WHIMPERING
COUGHING
I shouldn't be telling you
this. Oh, my God I did!
Abby, no, you didn't.
Yes, I did! That is
In the bathroom
That's some ratchet shit.
What?
DOOR OPENS
Don't you knock?
I just wanted to say how disgusted
I was with the photo.
It was totally not OK!
Thanks, Mabel.
I couldn't believe it when I saw it.
So problematic!
I heard you wanted
to get the portrait taken down?
Well, I have got your back.
Anything that you need,
I'll be like an arsenal behind you.
Cos as a school, I feel
we should be doing better, you know?
There's all this information
and no-one's using it
You're an ally! She gets it, Mabel.
Anything else?
Er, yeah. I was thinking that maybe
we could head over together?
To the run?
Um, do you know what?
You go ahead
and I'll meet you there, OK?
Are you sure? I'm sure. That's cool.
Um, because I don't mind waiting.
OK.
Or I could lend a hand
..and help you with Abby's hair?
Um Nah, I'm good.
I promise.
But thanks, though. I've got it.
OK. Yeah? OK, yeah, sure.
Yeah, no worries.
I'll just go and find us a spot.
That's yours.
It's a little sticky
Oh, thank you.
Careful of that thing.
You'll take an eye out.
OK, I'll see you guys later.
Bye, Mabel.
That girl is so annoying.
She's a little beggy
but she's growing on me, man.
Oh She's all right.
Ooh, and I think we done. Ooh.
Edge kind of vibe. Let me show you.
OK.
Ooh! Mm
Yeah? Mm-hm.
No, justjust comb it back.
You look fire! Quickly!
I've got to go somewhere first.
OK, you've got a man.
I will say this though,
don't let no dickhead
tell you how to wear your hair.
That's your crown.
You going to do it like I said,
or not?
Jackpot.
Fam, why are black people
never on time?
Ugh! You stink!
Yeah, I might've fallen
into some bins.
Oh, my days.
Just leave it, OK?
Brother, you got to let
this secret society thing go.
Would've just been cool
if it were real, you know?
Like-minded people and that.
Don't even worry about it, man.
Anyway, probably would've
been a bunch of boys
bumming in a basement somewhere.
Unless that's what you're
looking for? No shade.
Can I go for a piss? Huh?
Can I go for a piss?
Go for a piss, yes.
What's wrong with you?
Asking permission for?
"Can I go for a piss?"
Fucking hell. That boy's going
to get eaten alive in here.
Jaheim. We're here, man. Hurry up.
Why you always keep man waitin'?
SNIFFLES
EXHALES SHARPLY
Hi.
How you doing?
Gorgeous weather
we're having, isn't it?
Hey. I heard you're the weed man.
For fuck's sake! What, every yute
with dreads sells weed, yeah?
I mean, yes! That's me!
LAUGHS WEAKLY
What did you need?
Obviously some weed, duh.
For starters,
let me get your Snap, innit?
So I can message you
when the shipment lands.
Oh, OK. Cool.
Love.
Um, my name's Toby, by the way.
Abby.
What was that about?
What did you hear? I heard
you were going to sell her drugs.
So if you heard, why you asking?
Don't you think that's a bad idea?
Brother, when I want advice from
someone that smells like a skip,
I'll ask.
Where's Jaheim? Don't know.
I'm starting to think maybe
I was a bit harsh on him.
Nah, man. He's a big boy.
He'll bounce back.
Don't know why this little
dickhead's got me caring for him.
It's minor, man. It's minor.
Now come
Let's find out what stupidness
these posh boys are keeping up with.
Where's this Running of the Bulls
thing taking place anyway?
It's not the Running of the BULLS.
It's the Running of the BALLS.
What?
ALL ROARING
CHEERING
White people are different!
Waitis that Femi?
Gwan, Femi, you weirdo!
Nah, he should've creamed
his skin though.
He's looking ashy as fuck!
The Raisinettes.
They're actually real.
Oh, my days!
BELL TOLLS
ROARS IN VICTORY
OTHERS CHEER
CROWD CHANTING: Femi, Femi, Femi!
WHOOPING
ALL CHANTING AND CHEERING
CHEERING IN DISTANCE
Yo, Malachi.
You man still want to come, yeah?
I got a madness I need help
dealing with.
scenes which some viewers may find
upsetting and strong language
Hello? You all right?
He stinks. He smells so bad!
Do you want some champagne,
maybe warm you up a little bit?
Get off! Don't be ungrateful.
This is 110 a bottle! Just a smidge.
It's 110! Just a smidge! Come on.
CORK POPS, CHEERING
I have a journalist
coming to talk to us
about our new scholarship programme
and he'd very much like
to interview you, too.
He'll want to talk about
your charity, of course,
and get your take
on how St Gilbert's
may possibly have fallen behind
other public schools
in giving access to
excellent education to all,
but how I tirelessly sought out
a charity like yours
to give these scholarships
to talented students
from disadvantaged backgrounds.
Verbatim, or can I put it
in my own words?
Guessing I shouldn't
mention the video.
SHOUTING
I mean, you knew it was bad when
even The Daily Mail called it
"The Great British Shame".
But, hey, if a few of my kids get
an opportunity to attend a place
like this, I'm happy to run with
whatever narrative you guys want.
Polo?
Hey, yo! What?
Hey, come on back, you little pig!
Or what?
We have high standards
at St Gilbert's.
We expect every new pupil
to uphold them.
All right, come here, bro!
Our students are required to be
confident and courageous,
not to mention committed.
HE GRUNTS
They must be tenacious
Excuse me, do you mind if I put
this poster on your notice board?
Sure, what is it?
Just about how we need to stop
hipster coffee shops like these
from gutting the life and soul
out of black neighbourhoods.
Creative,
discerning,
cultured,
with an eye for detail
and a real appreciation of the arts.
Omar!
Students must be hard-working
You want to be gangster, eh?
Smoking the drugs
and popping the caps in my ass!
I said Nigeria or boarding school!
He worked and applied himself
and got in! What did you do?
Exactly! So pack your bags, uh!
So pack your bags, uh!
..and of course, enterprising
Look, I done told you,
I ain't paying for these kicks!
Look, the stitching's falling apart!
..knows his stuff, yes.
I learnt Farsi so I don't get
robbed by lickle pum-pums like you!
Now put my tings inna de bag!
Dickhead!
SHE SPEAKS FARSI
They wouldn't be anything else.
I don't have to go
if you don't want me to, you know?
What? Why are you trying to
get out of buying me a Porsche?
That's not how it works, D.
People go private school
to get rich, right?
ListenCaleb, just call me
if you need me, yeah?
I'll call you when I decide
what kind of Porsche I want.
Ah!
Hey, tap out! Tap out! Tap out!
Never!
Jaheim!
Black plastic bag?
You couldn't find a suitcase?
It's fine, man. We're good, Grandma.
You bathe?
Yeah. You have pants?
Yes, Grandma. Hmm. Dem clean?
Yes, Grandma!
Don't forget your manners,
and don't get into trouble, OK?
I won't. I promise.
OK.
Brother, I'll catch you
..in a bit, bro. Yeah.
Call you when I'm there. Mm-hm.
Take care, yeah?
MUSIC: Amplify
by Guvna B and DarkoVibes
Yo, private school boy!
Represent us out there, you know?
Yeah? Send me one of them
posh white girls, yo.
A freaky one. Like you would know
what to do with it, brother!
Come on, now. Yo.
Yo, them posh boys
move mad too, you know?
Wanking in circles
over digestive biscuits.
Last one to bust has to eat it!
EXCLAIMS
Man, are you serious?
What's wrong with you, man?
See what weed has done
to this guy's brain, bruv?
Did I say me? You make everything
All right, listen, bro.
Why didn't you tell me
that you needed peas, fam?
Bro, come on now. I'm good, bro.
What do you mean, "Come on?"
Look at this, bro.
Nah, bro. It's good. Hold this.
Hold this, bro.
All right.
Make sure you don't
forget us, you know?
Remember, we made you
right here, you know?
Brother, you man are acting like
I'm going to war or something, bro.
You ain't comin' back.
Is he comin' back?
Little waffin.
Leaving ends.
Aight.
Hold it down out there, bro.
Show them! Aight. Aight, man.
Yeah? In a bit.
All right.
Later, J.
What the hell you got in there?
Why you so inna?
Help me with this one, please.
SHE KISSES TEETH
Yeah! You all right, Jaheim?
I'm great. How are you?
Looks like you need
a little bit of a trim.
Umwhat's that?
Me and Caleb got in
a little play-fight, innit?
Lickle man caught
a lucky right hand.
Look, I'm here like you wanted me.
Look, if you think
you're doing this for me,
you might as well go home right now.
Yeah.
Aight.
Man like Jaheim, you know.
What you tellin' me?
I'm good. Good, yeah? Yes, sir.
Where's Femi? No way that little
African decided he ain't coming.
He said his parents are
going to drop him there.
OK.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh!
Can I help you?
I'm genuinely just shocked
that you accepted your place.
You're meant to be
"Down with the establishment!"
But you're accepting a scholarship
to a fee-paying school?
How else am I supposed to
get a seat at the table, Toby?
What? I had to fight just to
get on this scholarship ting
meant for only those with dicks.
Hey!
It's not our fault underprivileged
black boys are "in" at the moment.
I lie?
So why are you here, Toby?
A good education, obviously.
You know, broaden my horizon.
And
..pumzy.
Shock!
Omar?
Stupid not to, right?
I mean, it's got art studios,
three libraries, a theatre.
Yeah, yeah. We all read
the same brochure, my guy.
Plus, it's the home of PF Raisin.
PF Raisin? Yeah.
Who's that? He was a cartoonist.
Satirical kind of stuff,
you know, like really, really funny.
Apparently, there's like a secret
society, like, dedicated to him.
It'd be amazing if it were real
and I got to join it, you know?
Wow.
You're defo not gettin' any pumzy.
I think you mean dick. Oh, fire!
What do you reckon it'll be like?
I don't know.
Probably like our old schools.
More money, less metal detectors.
Do you hear that, Jaheim?
Less metal detectors.
Ahaha! Shut up!
Whatever it's like
..I say we just go
and enjoy ourselves.
Oh, hundred! Listen, I said
it before and I'll say it again,
you have not lived the full
private school experience
if you don't come back with
a STI and a coke habit.
What the fuck? It's true!
Sit down.
DOOR CLOSES
I want you to remember that
this wasn't an open invite
to everybody and anybody
from the ends.
Sorry. It's just "ends".
I encouraged you to come to
my after-school club because I saw
incredible talent that wasn't being
nurtured at your individual schools.
That talent that you continue
to work hard at
is what got you your scholarships
at St Gilbert's.
No-one will know that
better than you.
Don't be who they expect you to be.
This is mad.
Wait, is that Femi?
This is how we're living?
Femi! Nah. Femi! Yo!
He can't hear you, guys.
GUS: OK, time to go.
Welcome to your new home.
Yeah!
Yeah! Aight, this is serious.
This? Serious!
You OK? Yeah, yeah.
Femi!
Hey
Those are the ones
you need to stay away from!
You worked too hard
to waste this chance.
Make me proud, OK?
If you must know,
I'm shotting 'em, innit?
These rich whities love
a road man trainer, you know.
You're an idiot.
All right.
It's important to look the part.
Is that going to stop them
from staring?
If they stare, stare back.
Hi! How you doing?
Gorgeous weather we're having.
WOMAN SIGHS
Let them know you belong.
All right, good luck. Go.
What, you're not coming with us?
What, you want me to hold your hand?
Look, you're prepped for this,
all of you, all right?
If you need me,
I'm just a call away.
But don't be callin' all the time.
Don't be popping off my phone!
All right, go on.
Good luck, good luck, good luck!
Go!
GENERAL CHATTER
Room allocation first, right?
Says here it's in the study hall.
Where is that?
Excuse me, do you know where the?
OK. Thanks, anyway.
We're all in Malton.
That's fun.
Please God, mixed boarding.
Bro, you're here
with Crispin, bro!
Crispin! Bet that's
one of them wet whities
that thinks he's black and that.
Yeah, he's going to get me
to line up his ginger fade
and spit bars on
his mixtape and that.
I think it's a little more
progressive than that.
Bro, I've already been
asked if I sell weed.
Serious, man?
Your girl is about to intro herself
to her new boarding ride or die!
Are you filming me?
Hi.
I'm Mabel.
It's so nice to meet you.
OK.
Apparently, we're in
the same boarding house.
Hilarious, right?
Yeah. LOL.
If you have any questions,
don't hesitate to ask.
I've been boarding
since I was seven.
I, like, barely
even know my parents.
Francois de Gange.
Oi, that's a mad name.
Hi, I'm Beatrix.
Oh, OK.
And, er, this is Florence.
Hi. Is it your first time boarding?
What makes you think that?
Your suitcase is a binbag, bro.
Well, if you need a tour or
anything, I'm really happy to help.
Thank you, Beatrix. Mm.
And if you need any help
from me with anything,
I'll be glad to do that.
Well, I've never seen a black penis
before, so there's that.
GIRLS SNIGGER
Bea!
Bro, D, this place a go be fire!
Hey.
Babes!
Maybe next time you could piss on me
to let everyone know I'm yours.
Hey, how you doing? Rupert.
You guys must be
the, er, scholarships.
What's your name? Jaheim.
Ja-what? Jaheim.
Jaheim. Yes.
So where you from?
My man said it like he's G-checking
me. For real. What's that, sorry?
Nothing. London joke.
You wouldn't get it.
London? Yeah. Nice. Which part?
Lewisham. Not so sure.
South London. Oh, like Brixton?
No, not like Brixton, no. We went
to go and see Stormzy in Brixton.
Oh, did you? Yeah. You know,
that's my cousin! Really?
Yeah! Yeah, yeah man.
So is Skepta and Giggs.
Wow. Small world. Uh-huh.
Should've used a bag for life.
See you around, boys.
Right, Mimsy, I think we've got
time to take one more photograph.
Why don't we take one under
the portrait of the founder?
If you can line up along there
Right, oh.
Maybe
The bruise.
Yes. Every new student takes one
for the newsletter.
OK, you ready?
Leah, turn Leah! Turn around.
Yes, right. Take a picture.
Jaheim actually got G-checked
by a brother called Rupert.
Brother, shut up, man.
His name is Rupert.
Separately, I should've banged him
in his flippin' face.
Big man ting, you should've.
How have we been here ten minutes
and you man are already warring?
It's him! And you, stop gassing him!
Oi, chill! Chill, bro!
I knew I recognised him. Look.
Eh! No No way. Oh, man.
Ah! And he's still here after that?
Yeah, you see? These rich guys,
they get away with murder.
Which is why you two shouldn't
be fucking with him.
HIGH-PITCHED: Ooh, first lecture
at St Gilbert's!
Listen, there's no just you,
you know. It's us.
So if you get in shit,
we're all fucked.
All right, let me
tell you something, yeah?
You need to stop thinking the worst
of me. I'm actually a delight.
Look, bun that.
There are more progressive ways
to sort shit out, you know?
We should start
an Afro-Caribbean Society.
BOYS GROAN
Power in numbers!
There's always drama round
the corner in places like these.
So we should've already been ready.
Listen, like I said,
I'm just here to shot two-two
trainers and shot two-two gyal.
Alie! Literally! Good luck
with that though, yeah? Yeah.
I'm rootin' for you.
Have you lot not watched Get Out?
It's not just a film, you know.
It's gospel.
That's how you man end up
in a sunken place.
GENERAL CHATTER
GIRLS WHOOP, LAUGH
Hi.
Um, which one of you is Abby?
I am.
I'm Leah. I thought I was
the only one.
Only one of what?
Hey, man.
Femi.
Mm. Ooh, brother.
Hey OK Er Oh, oh! OK!
THEY LAUGH
Oh, rah.
I wrote it myself.
Which programme?
It's called Deity?
That's cool, man.
Have you ever tried
using Silverscape?
Yeah, you see all that
glitchy stuff there?
It just irons out before you have
to go through a shitload of code.
Digestive?
Actually, you know what, bro?
I'm good.
CAMERA CLICKS
OK.
FEMI SIGHS
Um
..can I get a picture of you?
My mum wants a picture
of my roommate.
It's for my family WhatsApp group.
Oh, God, sorry.
Er No, no, no. Of course, mate.
OK.
Together would probably be less
weird, right?
Yeah. Right? Yeah. Yeah.
Uh, this guy! Yeah.
THEY LAUGH
This guy, yeah!
See you around.
"Stop silencing the gildem".
It's "gal dem".
Nice!
LAUGHTER
GENERAL CHATTER
Nah, I'll probably just head
to you like in ten minutes.
Hi. What's your name?
No, I don't want to talk to you.
SCREAMING
J
VIDEO STOPS
PHONE: The person you're calling
is unable to take your call.
Please leave a message
after the tone.
Hey, Mum. You're probably
at work or something.
I just wanted to let you know
that I've, um
..I've arrived all right. Um
..chat later.
HE SIGHS
ORGAN FANFARE PLAYS
BUZZ OF CONVERSATION
Hi!
What you doing?
GIRLS WHISPER
Oh, my God
SHE WHISPERS
..it's ridiculous.
Gilbertus numquam concedat!
ALL: Gilbertus semper duret!
I hope you enjoyed
the summer holidays.
Now as you are aware,
St Gilbert's has been
..under the spotlight.
But I'd like you all to know
that the school
is turning over a new leaf
and looking to the future.
And with that in mind,
I want you all to make sure
that our new students
in the Lower Sixth
are made to feel right at home.
I hope you enjoy your time here
..and that you wear
your uniform with pride.
Whoever you were before
doesn't matter.
You are a Gilbertine now.
QUIETLY: What the fuck?
Have you seen how they lined us up?
Sh!
Where's the other one?
Today's hymn is
Eternal Father, Strong To Save.
MUSIC STRIKES UP
# Eter #
BELL RINGS
Psst, big man.
You looking for some kicks?
Seriously, mate, fuck off.
How many have you sold?
Rome wasn't built in a day,
my friend.
And I don't think the Colosseum
was bought
from East Street Market
either. What are you doing?
OK, so I'm looking into the secret
society, The Raisinettes.
This is a floor plan
of St Gilbert's,
and this is the map
I got from the internet
from an unpublished
piece of work from Raisin
which I put on tracing paper,
and look.
Also, his last book was
called The Dormitory.
"Dormitory" is an anagram
for "dirty room".
Dirty room! Bins!
Big man, I beg you,
don't go rooting round the bins.
TEACHER: Everyone, settle down,
settle down! Look
Psst, Stormzy. Hey!
I heard you're
the man selling creps.
Yeah, yeah. What'd you need?
An ounce.
An ounce? Sh!
Hey, I'm good for it, all right?
Just bring it to Running of
the Balls. It's going to be mad!
An ounce?
WHISTLE BLOWS
Look alive, lads!
If you want to make the squad,
you work for it.
This is not a game for the weak.
This is the game of the gods.
That being said, it is
just a trial match, so take it easy.
WHISTLE BLOWS, BOYS SHOU
But I ain't never played before.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Come on!
Let's go!
MUSIC: In A Bag
by Leon Riley and Jamie Shield
Go on, Rupert!
APPLAUSE, WHISTLE BLOWS
I guess it wasn't
a sports scholarship?
Stop fucking around, Rupert!
Let's go!
Well, run, you dildo!
Get in there, lad!
That's impressive.
You never know who's watching.
Try fucking together rather
than each other.
Fuck, he's so yummy!
Stop dribbling, bitch!
I just want to gobble him up
and have him live in my tummy.
You are so fucking weird.
Oi, Florence! Beatrix! Abby!
If you could put
your tongues away
THEY YELL
What, so Florence your ting, yeah?
She's out of your league, mate.
She's more champagne
and cocktails, you know?
Less Red Stripe and Supermalt.
Speaking of champagne,
I saw that video.
Way to show the homeless, man.
That video is why you and your
charity case friends are here.
Surely a thank you is in order.
Pass the fucking ball, man!
WHISTLE
He's doing absolutely
brilliant there.
Did you see him?
Got to absolutely watch that.
WHISTLE
OK, lads!
Crouch!
Bind!
Set!
Fuck What the fuck?
What the fuck? Fucking dickhead!
Are you fucking dumb?
Who the fuck do you think you're..
Hey, hey, hey, you!
Yeah? Come on, then!
Get off my pitch! You, off my pitch!
You're embarrassing yourselves,
both of you!
INDISTINCT CELEBRATIONS
You were pratting around
the whole fucking time!
What the fuck was that?
My hand slipped
If you think you're untouchable,
you're not.
Our dad's just rich and he's done
bailing you the fuck out.
So unless you want to be
sent to the comp down the road,
stop acting like a fucking infant
and get your shit together!
All right, OK.
Ah!
Your little stunt brought him here,
and he made you
look like a right prick.
Fucking embarrassment.
BELL RINGS
CLOCK TICKS SOFTLY
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
Stand when the headmaster
enters the room.
HEADMASTER SIGHS
Day one, Mr Marsham.
Your personal statement.
I'd like you to read it.
Out loud.
"I'm writing to express my interest
in attending St Gilbert's College.
"I'm a bright, motivated
and well-rounded student
"with a strong academic record
and a passion for learning."
Now paragraph three.
"Opportunities like this
are rare for boys like me,
"especially where
"..from where I come from.
"If I were given this opportunity,
it would not only give me
"the education I need but also
the life skills that would allow me
"to help those I care about most,
"including my grandmother,
"my youngest brother Caleb
"and my mother."
What were you doing in there?
Listen, we did not sit through
three exams and two interviews
I know! I had to do it too!
Then why don't you act like it?
You don't even know what happened.
Yeah, but I know you, Jaheim,
and that's the problem.
Cool.
Bernard!
"Master" will suffice,
Miss Dulverton.
I'm not going to be
calling you Master.
Was there something specific?
It has already been
brought to my attention.
An unfortunate mistake.
And? And?
And the portrait is
going to be taken down.
My uncle could literally
scrap it for you for 30 quid.
That portrait, which depicts
the founder of the school,
has been here longer
than both you or I
Out with the old,
in with the new, right?
I'm sure you can find something
just as cheap looking,
yet inoffensive, online.
We're done here, Miss Dulverton.
We don't like the portrait.
None of us do.
May I suggest you spend less energy
on things you can't change,
and more on things you can.
For starters,
getting your acts together.
BELL RINGS
Something about it being here
longer than him or me,
like, that makes no sense to me.
He was like, "Oh, you can
call me Master." Is he good?
What'd that guy say?
"Running of the Bulls"? Mm.
That's what he said, yeah.
It's not actually bulls
though, right?
I mean, I wouldn't be surprised.
This place is mad extra. Mm.
Oh, it's like that, yeah?
Yeah, it's like that.
Leah, man. What?
Nah, it's calm. It's calm.
Let her be angry.
I'll check you lot later, innit?
Goodbye.
That's Azim's car, man.
He always parks there.
PHONE RINGS
Yo! What you tellin' me, my guy?
Man's been waiting for
your call, bruv! Who's that?
It's the dark skinned Akala,
you get me? Scholarship boy!
East End,
when we comin' to visit you, bro?
You think I'm going to let you lot
near here, bruv, cause mayhem?
Pfffft. Man's embarrassed
of the mandem.
He's getting, like, uptown now.
What you sayin', you good, though?
Man spoke to Grandma,
spoke to Caleb.
He's blessed.
I've got him, yeah?
Bro, you sure you're good though?
DOOR OPENS
Um, yeah. Man, I got to go.
Umstay safe, innit?
Why you look so stressed, fam?
You sayin' this school got
you down bad like that, yeah?
Bro, it's minor, innit?
Just long days, innit.
Bro, I hear that.
Miss Kaneko's been
griding me hard, fam.
And not in the way I like, either.
That's your fault for
doing Japanese, no?
Omaeno kaachan suttoke.
What does that mean?
It's Japanese for
"Suck your mother".
Come man, shot one time.
Say nothing.
You asked for it, innit?
Wait, what? You still
shotting them trainers? Yeah.
I was even going to try flingin'
'em out at this bulls ting.
But, bro, exploiting these
little white yutes
Hey, you know
if you ever need money for a trim,
you just have to ask, you know?
Bro.
I was working a weekend job to
help my mum around the house, fam.
But now that I'm here
..I'm just tryin'
to sort some cash to send back.
It's minor, though.
Well, I mean
If you ever need money, people
still think you're a drug dealer.
You're a dickhead, brev.
You sayin' you comin' later, yeah?
Nah, man. Allow dat.
What? Bro, you don't
know that bitch!
This girl is on you, fam!
Come on, man.
She's too much drama.
I don't need any more of that.
So, what, you just going to
stay in your room till graduation?
You're a size ten, I lie? Yeah.
Hold that, big man.
What ones are these?
Designer, man.
Top of the line.
Listen though, we're linkin'
at the statue at eight.
Make sure you're there. And don't be
late, fam. Say nothing. In a bit.
BEAT PLAYS
Oi-oi, come on!
Let's have it.
Urgh
Mate, what you doing?
I'm giving you a six pack.
Well, clearly you can't
fucking count.
Go on. Two, four, six, eight
Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tobes, no more alcohol
for this prick.
Some people have eight.
Like, if you're really ripped.
But who in their right mind
is going to believe
that I have an eight pack.
Who's going to believe
you have a six pack?
HE LAUGHS
Oh, OK.
OK, Scholarship, you're up!
No, no, no, no!
I'm happy to just watch.
Don't you want to be a Rah'scal?
A what?! I don't call us that.
That's what we're called!
Er
THEY LAUGH AWKWARDLY
No, it's a stupid name and we sound
like a bloody bunch of twats!
No, we're Rah'scals,
and a Rah'scal always runs.
What are you running from?
It's not actual bulls?
THEY GUFFAW
Or are you?
I'mI'mfucking confused!
CLATTERING AND GRUNTING
SIGHS ANGRILY
GROWLS
Who the fuck keeps coming into
my room and taking my stuff? Hm?
SCOFFS
You need a comb?
Got some hair products too.
You ever had your hair in box
braids? I think they'd look so dope.
Just comb it back.
OK
Right, I'm going to need you to
hold this for me as well.
Thank you.
What is it?
Some stuff I got from the market.
It burns, but that just
means it's working. What?
I'm playing with you.
No, I've got an aunt in Atlanta.
She sends this stuff over
for me and my mum.
Never met her.
Honestly,
it works too well to be legal.
So
..what are you doing now?
I'm just braiding it.
You've literally got the same
texture as my cousin's.
I feel like your curls
could be way more defined. Mm.
I don't really know what to do.
Don't worry. I'll teach you.
Really? Yes.
I've literally brought
my whole bathroom here.
I'm sure we'll find
something that works.
Yeah, no. I've seen that.
THEY LAUGH
FLUSHING, DOOR UNLOCKS
Man said designers and they're
already ripping? Joke, man.
Always playin' about.
Oh! Uh!
What the fuck is that?!
Fucking dick!
Keep filming, keep filming,
keep filming!
Oh, oh! Whoa! What you doing?
What you doing?
URINATING
That's enough!
No, no, no! What the fuck?
What you doing?! Fuck off!
Let's go.
SPITS
Piece of shit.
WHIMPERING
COUGHING
I shouldn't be telling you
this. Oh, my God I did!
Abby, no, you didn't.
Yes, I did! That is
In the bathroom
That's some ratchet shit.
What?
DOOR OPENS
Don't you knock?
I just wanted to say how disgusted
I was with the photo.
It was totally not OK!
Thanks, Mabel.
I couldn't believe it when I saw it.
So problematic!
I heard you wanted
to get the portrait taken down?
Well, I have got your back.
Anything that you need,
I'll be like an arsenal behind you.
Cos as a school, I feel
we should be doing better, you know?
There's all this information
and no-one's using it
You're an ally! She gets it, Mabel.
Anything else?
Er, yeah. I was thinking that maybe
we could head over together?
To the run?
Um, do you know what?
You go ahead
and I'll meet you there, OK?
Are you sure? I'm sure. That's cool.
Um, because I don't mind waiting.
OK.
Or I could lend a hand
..and help you with Abby's hair?
Um Nah, I'm good.
I promise.
But thanks, though. I've got it.
OK. Yeah? OK, yeah, sure.
Yeah, no worries.
I'll just go and find us a spot.
That's yours.
It's a little sticky
Oh, thank you.
Careful of that thing.
You'll take an eye out.
OK, I'll see you guys later.
Bye, Mabel.
That girl is so annoying.
She's a little beggy
but she's growing on me, man.
Oh She's all right.
Ooh, and I think we done. Ooh.
Edge kind of vibe. Let me show you.
OK.
Ooh! Mm
Yeah? Mm-hm.
No, justjust comb it back.
You look fire! Quickly!
I've got to go somewhere first.
OK, you've got a man.
I will say this though,
don't let no dickhead
tell you how to wear your hair.
That's your crown.
You going to do it like I said,
or not?
Jackpot.
Fam, why are black people
never on time?
Ugh! You stink!
Yeah, I might've fallen
into some bins.
Oh, my days.
Just leave it, OK?
Brother, you got to let
this secret society thing go.
Would've just been cool
if it were real, you know?
Like-minded people and that.
Don't even worry about it, man.
Anyway, probably would've
been a bunch of boys
bumming in a basement somewhere.
Unless that's what you're
looking for? No shade.
Can I go for a piss? Huh?
Can I go for a piss?
Go for a piss, yes.
What's wrong with you?
Asking permission for?
"Can I go for a piss?"
Fucking hell. That boy's going
to get eaten alive in here.
Jaheim. We're here, man. Hurry up.
Why you always keep man waitin'?
SNIFFLES
EXHALES SHARPLY
Hi.
How you doing?
Gorgeous weather
we're having, isn't it?
Hey. I heard you're the weed man.
For fuck's sake! What, every yute
with dreads sells weed, yeah?
I mean, yes! That's me!
LAUGHS WEAKLY
What did you need?
Obviously some weed, duh.
For starters,
let me get your Snap, innit?
So I can message you
when the shipment lands.
Oh, OK. Cool.
Love.
Um, my name's Toby, by the way.
Abby.
What was that about?
What did you hear? I heard
you were going to sell her drugs.
So if you heard, why you asking?
Don't you think that's a bad idea?
Brother, when I want advice from
someone that smells like a skip,
I'll ask.
Where's Jaheim? Don't know.
I'm starting to think maybe
I was a bit harsh on him.
Nah, man. He's a big boy.
He'll bounce back.
Don't know why this little
dickhead's got me caring for him.
It's minor, man. It's minor.
Now come
Let's find out what stupidness
these posh boys are keeping up with.
Where's this Running of the Bulls
thing taking place anyway?
It's not the Running of the BULLS.
It's the Running of the BALLS.
What?
ALL ROARING
CHEERING
White people are different!
Waitis that Femi?
Gwan, Femi, you weirdo!
Nah, he should've creamed
his skin though.
He's looking ashy as fuck!
The Raisinettes.
They're actually real.
Oh, my days!
BELL TOLLS
ROARS IN VICTORY
OTHERS CHEER
CROWD CHANTING: Femi, Femi, Femi!
WHOOPING
ALL CHANTING AND CHEERING
CHEERING IN DISTANCE
Yo, Malachi.
You man still want to come, yeah?
I got a madness I need help
dealing with.