D-Frag! (2014) s01e01 Episode Script

[students chatter]
[ROKA] Good morning.
Hi there! Would you
[ROKA groans]
[KAZAMA] Hey, you all right?
Think you dropped this.
Best watch yourself, huh?
[ROKA] Thank y--
[YOKOSHIMA] Yo, Kenji!
Hey, how's it goin'?
[KAZAMA] Meh. Y'know.
[YOKOSHIMA] Whaddya say
we start the day right,
ditch first period?
[KAZAMA]
Heh, heh. Idiot.
[GUY 1A] People are
losing their minds.
[GUY 1B laughs]
Who're they
supposed to be?
Dude, I'm surprised you haven't
caught wind of these guys yet.
Say hello to Fujou Academy's
newest crop of thugs.
The Kazama Gang!
You got Little Foot Yokoshima.
[GUY 1B] Takes a lotta
nerve to sport stripes
with a gut like that.
[GUY 1A] Long Mountain Nagayama.
[GUY 1B] What does
that even mean?
[GUY 1A] And their
ringleader, uh, um
Hang on, it'll come
to me Damn it.
It's part of the gang's name!
If you're givin' us
a runnin' commentary,
have your ducks in a row!
[GUY 1B] Run for your life!
Sorry, man. Our bad.
We just kinda
naturally stand out.
[KAZAMA]
Oh, yeah? Ya think?
Way to be here two minutes and
already get slapped with a rep.
Why people gotta go stereotypin'
juvenile delinquents like that?
[KAZAMA sighs]
Maybe we could soften our image
by joinin' one of those clubs.
Everyone seems to
like that sorta thing.
It's too late to set a course
for the straight
and narrow now, boys
'cause I plan on using these
fists to conquer the school!
[GIRL 1A] I think I finally
learned how to play a "fa."
[GIRL 1C] Remi!
[CHITOSE] Still no new
candidates for membership.
If things keep going like this,
we're destined to lose the club.
Why does the school care
if we stay like we are?
We're big enough!
They care simply because we
call ourselves a culture club
without having produced
a shred of culture.
Ugh. What do they want
from us? We play games!
Apparently that's not enough.
They're saying that if we stick
with the Game Creation handle,
we'll actually have
to create games.
Oh, yeah.
That really just
dawned on you?
Until today, I've been
able to navigate us
around that little
technicality, but
The fact is we're short
the minimum number
of members required.
I'm really going to miss sitting
around doing jack squat.
So when's the
recruitment deadline?
--[CHITOSE] Today.
--[SAKURA groans]
[YOKOSHIMA] Hahaha!
Here's the deal, fellas.
If the Kazama Gang's gonna let
the li'l sheeple around here
know who's boss,
we gots to strut our stuff!
Couple a' hostile takeovers,
maybe a turf war.
I suppose we could
always make a play
for the Golf Bag
Gang's territory.
The Golf Bag Gang?
That can't be their real name.
[YOKOSHIMA] Or We could
run a protection racket
on the culture clubs! Dude!
Think of the graft!
It'd be awesome!
Nice.
I mean, c'mon, what
self-respecting evil overlords
buy their own manga,
am I right?
Weren't you guys bitchin' about
stereotypes two minutes ago?
[YOKOSHIMA]
You said it yourself--
we've gotta conquer the school!
[NAGAYAMA & YOKOSHIMA yell]
Fire in the hole!
Everybody stop drop an'--
[ROKA gasps]
The hell's going on here?
Uh This fire is nothing
but an illusion, good sir.
Yeah, well, your "illusion's"
gonna burn this place down!
[NAGAYAMA] Kenji!
Fire Extinguisher!
Right, yes!
Ladies, please step aside!
Yeah! 'Cause that's
what's up, fire!
[ALL] Hooray!
The day is saved!
[KAZAMA] Whoa.
What am I doing?
Why do I give a crap
one way or the other?
You handled that
illusion admirably.
[KAZAMA] Were you
trying to kill us all?
How'd you manage to get the
damn thing started anyway?
[KAZAMA] Fireworks?
[YOKOSHIMA trembles]
You'll never know how much
we appreciate the help.
Yokoshima! What did you
do to him? Nagaya--!
Nagayama!!
What is wrong
with you people?
I'm channeling a
lightning elemental.
And I'm channeling
a water one!
[KAZAMA]
Okay, I'm lost.
Word of our powers must not
leak to the outside world.
So we're erasing your memories
of what just happened.
You girls are nuts!
[ROKA]
I'm sorry.
You've stolen a forbidden
glance into my fire magic.
I'm compelled to
make you forget.
I've done what now?
Are you tryin' to
say you're magical?
[ROKA] Each of us here is an
elemental magic wielder, yes.
[KAZAMA] You're all out
of your freakin' minds!
Let go of me, I'm serious!
Invoke Water Lock!
Invoke Lightning Lock!
Ugh! That's not
even a real thing!
[ROKA] I'm afraid
you've seen too much.
Y-You're totally gonna
burn me alive, aren't you?
Somebody help!
I hereby wipe your mind clean.
And, uh, if you.
If you don't forget,
I won't like you!
[KAZAMA]
Come again?
No! You've brought
her ultimate flame-based
Moe-Moe Attack
trembling to its knees!
[MINAMI] It's okay,
I don't think her wounds
are beyond healing!
[KAZAMA] Alrighty, then. Maybe
her and fire really are a thing.
[KAZAMA]
Hm? Uh--?
Earth elemental.
Huh?
Dirt Punch, bitch!
Okay, first of all, that was
a cheap shot; second of all,
earth elemental magic
is supposed to be neutral!
Ooh, neutral magic, eh?
He's catching on pretty fast.
Uh-huh. Not just anybody
would blurt that out.
I'm sorry I was late.
I was building a sandcastle.
[KAZAMA]
How old are you?
Which explains why my
hands are covered with dirt.
Hence, earth elemental.
Well, that clears that up!
I've got to make
a run for it.
[YOKOSHIMA] Yo, Kenji!
Wanna drumstick?
[NAGAYAMA] Check me
while I sink this shot!
[KAZAMA] 'Cept I can't
just leave 'em here
with these crazies.
If you're trying to
banish the guy's memory,
I don't think it's working.
Yeah, no kidding.
I know. We'll launch an attack
comprised of all our
elements working in tandem!
[KAZAMA] This is
not gonna end well.
[NAGAYAMA & YOKOSHIMA]
We'll always be best friends!
I'll come back for you!
[CHITOSE] What kind of man
leaves his friends to die?
[KAZAMA] Least in this scenario
one of us survives!
Why do I feel the need to
plead my case with the enemy?
Turn around and
face your fate!
Uh, that might've
been a little harsh.
[KAZAMA] Aahhh!
They're gonna kill me!
[CHITOSE] It was
a figure of speech!
Figure of speech, my butt!
You're homicidal!
[KAZAMA yells, pants]
Nooo!
[KAZAMA pants]
You're good. Calm down,
you managed to shake 'em.
What kinda club're they runnin',
anyway? They're all insane.
Excuse me.
Fire magic girl!
I never said thank you.
Thank you?
For coming to our rescue.
Uh What now?
We've learned our lesson.
No more fireworks
in the clubroom.
Well, good for you!
What were they doing there
in the first place?
We need new members
and I thought
a pyrotechnic display
would be good marketing.
You could've burned the
whole school to the ground!
That's true. Why didn't
I think of that?
[KAZAMA]
That's not what I meant!
Oh, and thanks
for this morning.
You picked up those
flyers for me.
It was a nice thing to do.
Uh Wait.
So You're the girl I saw
at the gate this morning?
You don't remember?
You were passing out flyers
for that schizophrenic club?
Schizophrenic?
Look, just
Just leave me alone
and we'll call it even, alright?
I'm glad I could give you
a hand. Have a nice life.
[ROKA] For the record,
my club could really use
somebody like you.
The club's yours?
Roka Shibasaki, at your service.
Game Club President.
I thought it was called
the Game Creation Club.
[ROKA] Whatever.
I'm recruiting you.
Thanks, but that's
not my scene.
[ROKA] It's not just about
gaming. It's about making games.
What're you doing?
You know your ultimate
fire-based whatever attack
isn't gonna work on me.
[ROKA] My fire magic
is mere camouflage.
[KAZAMA]
Huh?
Beneath this veneer.
I am a wielder of darkness.
Uh, okay.
[KAZAMA screams]
[YOKOSHIMA] What the?
[NAGAYAMA]
Did I miss somethin'?
[YOKOSHIMA]
Where did Kenji go?
[KAZAMA]
I'm in the dark!
[KAZAMA screams]
Help me! I can't see!
Where am I?
As of this moment, two paths
are open before you.
On the one hand, you do
the respectable thing
and join the Game Creation Club.
And on the other
[ROKA] Choose wisely,
hapless traveler.
[KAZAMA]
Okay! Fine, I'll join!
Just take this thing
off a' me! Please!
Now that's what
I like to hear.
Starting over. My name
is Roka Shibasaki.
Game Creation Club President.
Second-year Chitose
Karasuyama. What's up?
First-year Sakura Mizukami.
[KAZAMA] I don't care what your
names are, take this thing off!!
[CHITOSE] I'm gonna need
you to pay attention, noob.
[KAZAMA]
What're you doing?
[CHITOSE] Huh.
He seems to be caressing
the sole of my shoe
with his face.
Do you have a foot fetish?
[KAZAMA] No, I don't!
That's gross. Cut it out!
What's wrong with you?
Sorry about the ropes.
We didn't think you'd
hear us out otherwise.
You ever stop and
think maybe you're
takin' things a little too far?
All right then, Mr. Foot Fetish,
you've heard our names.
No! Knock it off!
You're tryin' to make me out
to be some kind of perv mage!
I was only pointing out
we don't know who you are.
Forget it.
Doesn't matter.
Wait, what?
Just hurry up and fill out
this club enrollment form.
[KAZAMA] If they hand
that thing to a teacher,
I am royally screwed.
[SAKURA giggles]
[KAZAMA] But if I
refuse to fill it out,
there's no telling what
they'll do to me. Damn.
Well, what do you know?
He doesn't throw a fit
about everything.
Glad you could see your way
clear to accepting our terms.
Whatever.
Well if that's it, I think
I'll head home now.
Sure. Knock yourself out.
Everything seems to be legit.
[KAZAMA] Sweet!
Phase one successful.
Now for phase two: cutting the
delivery girl off at the pass
as she's on her
way to the office,
ramping up the ol' charm,
and getting a hold of the form
before a teacher does. Simple.
Okay. Let's make
this official.
[KAZAMA]
Huh?
Right. You girls
have enough now.
[KAZAMA] Oh, son of a!
There's no way in hell
you're a teacher!
Gimme a break!
Oh. Miss Ohsawa--
club faculty advisor.
Nice to meet you.
[KAZAMA yells]
Déjà vu.
[CHITOSE] You squirrelly
little bastard!
Keep the rampage on dull.
[KAZAMA] Plan B,
I run for my life. Again.
What kind of teacher lets
them get away with--?
Gah, you're fast!
Heh. You got the drop on me last
time because I wasn't prepared.
But no one escapes me twice!
See, this round I was crouched
in a starting position
from the moment
you turned to leave.
[KAZAMA] I can't tell if this
girl's a moron or a genius.
'Member me? I'm Sakura Mizukami
from Class 1-D; the water type!
[KAZAMA] Who cares?
Hand over the enrollment form
now or I'll show you no mercy!
Somethin' wrong?
Dang it, I forgot
my water bottle!
[KAZAMA]
Huh?
Give me a second,
I'll be right back.
Promise not to go anywhere!
[KAZAMA] She really can't
do anything without water?
Girl's committed,
I'll give 'er that.
Heh. Shoulda known I
couldn't give you the slip.
If you hand over the
enrollment form this instant,
I shall do you a
kindness. I, uh
I'll sing your praises to
every corner of Fujou Academy.
Sorry, sweetheart.
Moe doesn't do it for me.
[ROKA gasps]
[ROKA grunts]
Vicious verbal
onslaught dodged!
[KAZAMA]
Now she's pissed!
Oh, come on! Enough with
the Darker than Black shtick!
It's really starting
to get on my nerves!
[ROKA] Tremble in
primordial darkness!
Feel the grip of deepest night
tighten around your throat!
Ugh. I'm blind as a flippin'
bat. If I don't get outta here,
the dirt freak's gonna
show up and clean my clock.
[ROKA] Chitose won't
be here for a while.
She's recharging at the sandbox.
[KAZAMA] It's scary how
serious they take this stuff.
Wait.
That gives me an idea.
It's just you an'
me then, isn't it?
One magic user alone
can't keep me in check.
We've already
established that! Hahahaha!
[KAZAMA] Um
Maybe I was a bit too cocky.
[KAZAMA screams]
Nice save! 'Kay, pull me up--
or don't, actually! Hold up!
[KAZAMA] This is not
how I want to end my day.
'Kay, so here's a thought.
It's not that far down.
If you let go, I'll probably-
[ROKA] Forget it!
I'm not letting go! I've finally
found a prospective new member;
you think that
happens every day?
You can't slip
through my fingers!
Stop bein' crazy,
you're gonna fall!
I accept my fate!
Look, you really need to stop
with the whole Moe act!
Shut up! It's not
an act! It's me!
But you
And you're totally slipping
through my fingers.
Wait, what happened
to not letting me go?
This position is
putting a lot of pressure
on my tummy, alright? Not that
you care, but it's my dream
to hear the pitter patter
of little feet someday.
I can see it now: two girls
and a boy in footie pajamas,
banging the trays
of their highchairs
while momma cracks open
a jar of strained carrots.
Okay, I'm done. Just let me
fall, please! Whenever is good.
Nicely done, madam president.
[KAZAMA]
'Bout time.
I thought I was
a goner for sure.
Let's get out of here.
Kenji Kazama
from Class 2-B.
Welcome to the Game
Creation Club, Kenji.
[KAZAMA]
Thank you.
So I kinda let myself get
caught up in the moment
and joined their club.
I know: what's wrong with me?
Which club again?
Were we there?
[KAZAMA] Oh, come on!
Seriously? This is ridiculous!
Anyway, boss,
check out my 'do!
No idea where it came from,
but I think we got a keeper!
Oh, yeah!
That's awesome!
[YOKOSHIMA] I know, right? If I
had like a pair of nunchuks
[KAZAMA] Guess
it's for the best.
No point draggin'
my boys into this.
[ATARU]
Kenji!
Are you hurt?
Where did they get you?
You gotta talk to me, Kenji!
Where does it hurt the worst?
I'm not seeing any obvious
contusions or lacerations,
thank heavens, but still
We're not out of
the woods just yet.
Let's get those clothes
off and have a look!
[KAZAMA] Ataru!
Am I supposed to have
the first clue what
you're talkin' about?
'Cause if you don't stop
gabbing, I swear on my life
Well, well, what brings
the Vice Prez here?
[ATARU groans]
Stop it, you know I despise it
when my friends call me that.
Call me Acchan. You know, like
you used to back in the day.
It's not like
we've been besties
since elementary
school or anything!
[YOUNG ATARU]
C'mon, guys! Follow me!
[YOUNG KAZAMA]
Wait up!
We were inseparable;
but for some reason
best known to yourselves
you fell into a life
of thuggishness
and petty crime.
Why did you turn
your backs on me?
[KAZAMA] Will you just tell
us what you're doing here?
Ah. Yes, of course.
Kenji. Word through the
grapevine is is, well,
that you might have joined the
so-called Game Creation Club.
Yeah, and what if I have?
It's a dangerous place.
I'm not speaking of the
club itself necessarily.
But Chitose Karasuyama
cannot be trusted.
Come on! She's a
dirt freak; so what?
Are you out of your mind?
She happens to be Fujou's
Student Body President!
What the--? You gotta
be kidding me!!
[ATARU]
I don't kid, my friend.
Chitose is the Academy's
15th Student Body President.
And between her shrewd
political maneuvering
and her animal magnetism,
she's got the whole school--
even the faculty--
eating right out of her hand.
She's so powerful,
so implacable,
the Heavenly Kings,
the Two Brothers,
and the Band of Fourteen
Devils all went into hiding!
Wait, you're tellin' me
this place already had
that many gangs
before we got here?
Oh, please! As far as everyone
else in school is concerned,
you lot might as well
have just fallen
off the back of a turnip truck!
[KAZAMA]
Ouch.
Back to Miss Karasuyama.
My being Vice President makes
she and I eternal arch nemeses.
Condemned to fight
to the bitter end!
Hey, I want in on
some of that action!
Hell, yeah!
Don't forget
to include me!
[ATARU & KAZAMA]
Crap! She heard us!
Didn't anyone ever teach you
that it's bad manners
to eavesdrop?
I was standing near a
window; it's not my fault
you don't know how to use
your inside voice.
[KAZAMA] Oh, you just
happened to be near a window.
Just so you know, this is
the girls' locker room.
[GIRL 1G] Um, Miss President.
It's kind of chilly in here.
[ATARU & KAZAMA]
Just our luck.
Guess we got ourselves
some voyeurs.
Please don't say stuff
like that, Madam President!
My reputation is at stake!
Don't say "please"
to this nut bag,
she'll think we're
saying she's won!
Nice try, Madam President,
but you're on the second floor!
We'd be pretty bad at peeping
if we were tryin' to
do it from down here!
Don't be discouraged; I'm sure
that you could make it work
if you put your
heads together!
Wait, does she actually
want us to peep?
She values teamwork.
[YOKOSHIMA] I'm losing
my balance, guys!
[NAGAYAMA] My shoulders!
[KAZAMA] Maybe
Hello! I'm standing right here!
[KAZAMA] He really
wants this, huh?
[CHITOSE]
Ha ha! Loser!
You're not even the Low Man
on the Totem Pole!
Votes are in, Vice Prez. You're
always gonna be second best.
Hold up, didn't you
actually win the election
for Student Body President?
I thought it best to concede
victory to my opponent.
I wanted to contribute
without being hampered
by the endless red tape
of Executive Office.
But whenever I attempted
to make my voice heard
She She would
stomp on me!
She would put her boot to
my neck, and, oh, for shame
I found that I'd never
felt more alive!
You might want to keep that
kind of thing to yourself!
Ugh. I take it back, you dill
weeds are hopeless together.
Get out of here before
I drop a piano on you.
You gonna use one of your
special earth attacks?
[CHITOSE]
No. Just my spit.
[KAZAMA] Ugh! How could you
concede the victory to her?
[ATARU] You don't scare me!
I'll catch it with my tongue!
[ALL THREE]
What is wrong with you?
Really? And you wonder why we
stopped hangin' out together?
I can't handle this, man!
I cannot handle this!
I overestimated the
attack's efficiency.
Time to initiate Plan B.
[KAZAMA] It's spit! For the love
of all that's holy, will you--?!
Oh, crap! Screw this!
It just got real!
[KAZAMA] Don't just stand there,
you idiot! Run away!
To hell with that!
I'm standing my ground!
Dude, if that thing hits you,
it's not gonna be anything
like a boot to the neck!
I don't care! Running away
from this now means I'll be
a sole-licking sycophant for
the rest of my natural life!
I'm not giving in!
Today, everything changes!
I'm gonna save the
reputation of my friends!
Ataru
What in the hell?
Besties for life.
Count us in.
Aw, you guys
[ATARU] Hear that,
Madam President? Bring it on!
[KAZAMA]
Uh
I will surpass
your earth magic!
Never let it be said I don't
admire your moxy, VP, now die!
[ATARU and CHITOSE struggle]
[ATARU] Kenji!
A little help, please?
[KAZAMA] I'm sorry,
you need me for something?
Damn it, man! We can't
do this without you!
How am I supposed
to turn my life around
with you playing
tic-tac-toe?
[KAZAMA] Well you sure didn't
need me to get this far.
You, uh you
got two minutes.
That's as long as
I can keep this up.
[KAZAMA]
Nagayama!
Yeah, better make it one.
[KAZAMA]
Seriously?
Huh. That's not a
whole lot of time.
But if I start now,
that one minute
[KAZAMA growls]
[KAZAMA]
Hyah!
[ATARU]
Go!
[KAZAMA]
Hyah!
[CHITOSE gasps]
[KAZAMA]
should be enough!
[ATARU & KAZAMA grunt]
I set out to try
and save my friends.
But when it was all said
and done, you saved me.
Forget about it.
I was itchin' for some payback
anyway, so it all worked out.
[CHITOSE]
Bravo.
I didn't approve of Roka
enlisting you at first.
But I suppose
opinions can change.
Even if I have
won this round.
[KAZAMA & ATARU]
Uh Uhhh
[YOKOSHIMA]
Run away!
[KAZAMA]
Ehhh
[ROKA]
Hey, Kenji!
Oh, it's you.
FYI, we meet up
four times a week.
Tuesday, Wednesday,
Thursday and Friday.
Whatever. Look How come
you wanted me to join?
Why, do you think
the club is dumb?
Are you backing out?
I already submitted the
enrollment form, so
Guess I'm here to stay.
[ROKA] Awesome!