Love Story (2026) s01e01 Episode Script
Pilot
1
- Carolyn!
- Carolyn!
Hey.
- Carolyn, over here!
- Come on, Carolyn!
I need a different color.
Sorry, I just
This isn't gonna work for where
I'm going. They'll, um--
Do you want
a different shade or--
No.
Let's go
with something safe. Um
A neutral
A shade of nude. Sorry.
Your sister-in-law
is downstairs.
Tell her I'll be down in a
minute. I just need to change.
Thanks, Rosemarie.
Carolyn! Carolyn!
I don't want her holding
this weekend over me
like she does every
other family function.
She's trying,
John.
This is her trying.
Just give her some grace.
I just It's a wedding,
for Christ's sake.
She acts as if I'm asking her
to attend the Democratic
National Convention.
Did you stay
at the hotel again?
It's not like
she's begging me to come home.
What happened?
Supposed to leave an hour ago.
It's a summer Friday.
The tunnel was a parking lot.
Hi.
You haven't been on time a day
in your life, but when it
inconveniences you--
I'm just saying we're
gonna miss the welcome drinks.
My family's
gonna throw a hissy fit.
They're gonna find a reason
to throw one no matter what.
-Guys, I'm not doing this
with you.
-So if you wanna go there--
Okay, we both agreed to give
each other the benefit
of the doubt.
-Where's Jay?
-He couldn't make it.
-Who's Jay?
-The instructor.
-And where are his crutches?
He complains about his recovery
time, and yet he doesn't
bring them--
Pick your battles.
I'm sorry.
I'm just anxious.
I love you.
I appreciate you being here.
I love you too.
-Good.
Let's go.
Essex ground 9253
November, ready to taxi
with Mike northeast bound.
November, target is clear
for takeoff, runway 22.
Runway 22,
cleared for takeoff.
Saratoga 9253 November.
A pack, please.
Avert your eyes.
How was
that nightcap?
I ended up at the Tunnel
rolling around in the ball pit
with Mickey Rourke.
-Like hooking up?
-I don't know.
I don't remember.
But the sun was coming up
when I left, so now I'm just
bracing for impact.
You go home with that guy?
What guy?
The hot, tan one you were
talking to with the forearms
and the bad jeans?
I thought I saw
you guys leave together?
I just went home.
I was so tired.
Ugh. You're so fucking
cagey sometimes.
Here I am pouring my heart out.
What do you want me
to tell you?
-That you fucked him.
And that I'm not alone
on my path to self-destruction.
Hold it, please.
By the way, I wore
your Egyptian Musk last night,
and I'm not kidding,
three different guys, like,
inhaled me.
One of them said
I smelled like a Laundromat,
which, like, weird,
but I'll take it.
Shh.
Grace, he could hear you.
I thought the rule about not
talking in the elevator was
more of a myth.
-Like his sexuality.
-Shh. Shh.
He has
cameras everywhere.
-Give me a raise, motherfucker.
I didn't.
I left two.
Fuck. Grace.
Why would he bother
pursuing you if he knows
he doesn't have to?
I've tried playing hard to get,
and apparently I play it
too well.
Come here.
Come here.
Look at me.
You're beautiful.
Okay?
Hey.
Exploit his insecurities.
I read that somewhere.
-Until when?
-Until you're bored of him,
or he's too old to leave you.
Can we save the powwow
for after work, please?
We need those looks
that we pulled for Demi
pressed, bagged, and labeled,
and her PR rep is gonna
be here in, like, an hour.
Let's go. Chop chop.
Thank you.
And don't forget
that we have that fitting
with Annette at 11:00.
Prime example. Tanya tries
too hard to be authoritative.
Therefore, I have no respect
for her authority.
I feel like
her prisoner in this showroom,
as much as I love helping
Diane Sawyer accessorize.
Just tell Calvin you want
to move to PR. He loves you.
Oh, yeah.
Company's hemorrhaging money,
and he just got out of rehab.
Now's the time
to make it all about me.
I haven't even
been here a year.
Well, you used to be folding
his sweaters at the mall,
and now look where you are.
-I miss the mall.
Yo, this look like a library?
Fifty cents, man.
Yo, you get what you needed?
John Kennedy Jr.
has flunked his bar exam
for a second time.
His courthouse
days may be numbered
for John F. Kennedy Jr.
John F.
Kennedy Jr.'s flunked the New
York State bar exam again.
Kennedy will
lose his job.
Kennedy's last chance.
John F.
Kennedy Jr. is facing a long,
grueling prospect of studies
the dashing son
of the late president
He may have been
called the sexiest man alive,
but tonight he was
just plain embarrassed.
Strike three
and he's out of his job
as assistant DA.
What's next
for the famous heir?
"So what if he flubbed
the bar exam twice?"
Twice is in parentheticals.
"America's uncrowned prince
is facing 30
with a steady girlfriend,
fabulous looks,
even a movie role.
But now it's time
to hit those law books."
If it makes you feel any
better, anyone who knows you
knows that you don't have
a steady girlfriend.
Fuck off.
I can't show my face around
the city with these headlines
everywhere.
But you'll show your dick
to everyone at the gym.
Apparently this
is all I'm good for.
Well, as your cousin,
obviously I disagree.
Also, I'm an actual prince
w-with a title and everything.
W-What is this obsession
with anointing you?
You know, the funny thing is
when I first saw the headline,
"The Hunk Flunks,"
I thought to myself, "Wow,
this is bad, but it couldn't
possibly get any worse."
You'll take it again.
The DA's office has
a three-strike policy
for their assistants.
If I fail again,
I'm out of a job.
Well, then I guess
you better not fail.
I-I mean,
it's it's beautiful. Uh
Well, we can also try it
with a shawl. We can do
different styling options.
Is it the fit
you're bumping up against
or the dress itself?
Both. N-Neither.
I'm sorry, I'm really not very
good at this kind of thing.
Um, what do you think?
Oh, I-I think we can find you
something better.
-Really?
-Yes.
You know right away
if a dress works.
The confidence
should wash over you.
Well, Calvin specifically had
this dress in mind for her,
Carolyn,
so why don't we try it
with the shawl?
We can go from there.
I'm so sorry.
I was stuck on the phone
with David Geffen.
-How are you?
- Hi.
Let's have a look.
How do you feel?
Well, I mean,
it's, um-- it's beautiful.
Uh, but Carolyn was
just saying we could try
some other options.
Yes, the collection's
so wide-ranging, I just
I just figured
we could pull some alts.
Remind me, this is for the,
um, Bugsy premiere, right?
Yeah.
I mean
This is something
a little more charming.
You know? It's a sexier option.
I had an idea.
Why don't we let Calvin decide?
Well, what,
does she not work here too?
N-No, I
One second.
Calvin designed this suit
as part of the menswear
collection,
and I'm obsessed with it.
The detailing is just
Tanya.
Here.
Okay.
Okay. So obviously,
we'd have to take it in a bit,
but I think it's a bold choice,
and a fun nod to the film noir,
gangster genre.
I love it. Can I please
take her home with me?
- O-Okay.
Are you and Warren planning on
walking the carpet together?
Because-- I-I only ask 'cause
I wouldn't want your outfits
to clash.
All eyes are gonna be on you.
If he needs a different
shade of suit, he'll survive.
Mm-hmm.
I saw his name
on the guest list
for the Amazon fundraiser.
-Are you gonna be there?
-Oh, I can't.
I have a-a stage reading
at Circle in the Square.
Well, every major
designer is gonna be there,
so if I see Warren Beatty
in Armani or Ralph Lauren,
-you'll be hearing from me.
Did you want to pull
some accessories for Annette?
Sure.
No, I was talking to Carolyn.
You do know those pictures
don't help with
the nepotism charges.
They said the same shit
when your father appointed me
US Attorney
of the Southern District
of New York 30 years ago.
Do you think anybody's
questioning my credentials now?
How you holding up?
Great. Why? Did something
incredibly embarrassing
happen recently?
At least they called you hunky.
I'm not sure that
qualifies as a silver lining.
Look, you'll take it
a third time. You'll pass it.
This will all
be ancient history.
I can still recite
the editorials about
my high school report card.
I can assure you it won't be.
And by the way, I'm well aware
that this is the least
compelling sob story
in the world.
You cannot let the people
around you narrate your
successes and your setbacks.
At a certain point you have
to decide how you want to feel
about them.
Her assistant's picking that up
at 3:00, so just double-check
and make sure it's good to go.
It's ready. I got it.
Uh, and did that jacket
come back from the tailor yet?
- Y-Yeah.
-Hey, Tanya.
Um, do you happen to know if
there are any extra tickets
to that Amazon fundraiser?
Don't confuse his
little pat on the back earlier
for your status
at this company.
You're a saleswoman,
Carolyn. That's it.
Strong candidate
for an exorcism.
Whatever, I'm still going.
Really? What if she sees you?
If she wants to try
and sideline me, have at it.
Fellas, the hyenas have set up
camp, so don't forget
to suck in.
Let's go easy on John,
all right?
Can't have America finding out
their favorite son
has butterfingers.
Eat my ass, Colin.
Hey, I'd love to go where
only Madonna's gone before.
- Oh!
Hey, hey,
we have an odd number.
Then I'll be designated QB.
Oh, so both teams can suck?
Talk some shit
out of the gate. Let's go.
- All right,
let's go.
Hey, hang on a sec.
Hey, Troy. I thought
I burned you
in Columbus Circle.
I'm like white on rice, Johnny.
Prove it. We're down a man.
Hey, Murph, throw me
the fucking ball, okay?
Up the side, up the side.
Watch Happy Feet right here.
Probably not.
Of course not.
Mom
-Hi. Sorry I'm late.
- Ah.
-Where are you coming from?
-Well, I had
a touch football game.
At least
make something up.
-Hats off at the table, please.
Is your salmon cold?
-Oh, you didn't
have to wait for me.
-We didn't. It's just cold.
-Thank you, Eugie.
-Of course.
So is everyone planning
on attending Teddy Jr.'s
wedding this weekend?
I have to work, unfortunately.
-I'll be there.
-Really?
Can you imagine if I said no?
Uncle Teddy would probably
dispatch the Navy SEALs.
-Well, you two
can be each other's date.
How do you know I'm not
bringing someone already?
Well,
the wedding's in four days.
You cannot just spring
your flavor of the month
on them last minute.
He's trying to get a rise out
of you. Please don't take
the bait.
Well, maybe I should just
become celibate
and join the priesthood.
People magazine's "Sexiest
Priest Alive" doesn't quite
have the same ring to it.
Thank you, Eugie.
I see you're eating meat again.
Well,
I never swore off meat, Mother.
I was experimenting
with a vegetarian diet
because Daryl
made a very valid case for it.
Well, either way,
it wasn't sustainable.
My relationship or my diet?
You know, maybe if
she'd been made to feel
a bit more welcome--
-Sweetheart--
-And despite your impressions,
Daryl actually does care
what you think of her.
Of course she does.
She's an actress. She cares
what everyone thinks of her.
What decade are you living in?
She's an artist, Mom.
Oh, yes, I saw that recently
she played a 50-foot giant.
Maybe she'll invite you
to the Oscars.
Why don't you
just save us all a lot of time
and tell me exactly who you'd
like me to bring home to you,
'cause I guarantee inevitably
you'll find something wrong
with them too.
-There are lots of girls.
-Yeah, like who?
You act as if I'm the only
thing standing between you
and happily ever after.
Yeah, well,
she's back in LA now, so
Bed-hopping with rock stars.
-Mom.
I love how
you pose these questions
like you don't obsessively
monitor my personal life.
Apple doesn't fall far.
Hey, I read the shit that gets
thrown in my face, all right?
Not everyone's
awarded the same privacy.
Well, that's one way
of looking at it.
Meaning what, Ed?
Would you prefer
that I not be invested
in my child's personal life?
Well, you never seem
to harangue Caroline
for her life's choices.
I think all of
my psychiatrists would
argue otherwise.
Your sister is
settled down with children.
Her personal life isn't
chronicled in every tabloid
in the country
like it's
an episode of Santa Barbara.
Yeah, this coming from a woman
whose second marriage was
condemned by the Pope.
I worked too hard
to watch you be
sucked into this pervasive
narrative of entitlement
and recklessness
that's plagued every
other member of this family.
Good evening.
Dan Rather reporting.
Former Massachusetts Senator,
Paul Tsongas,
announced his decision today,
again, at a news conference
in Boston.
Tsongas said
he will not reenter the race
for the Democratic
presidential nomination.
One thing everybody's talking
about this election year
is the lack
of affordable health care.
CBS News health correspondent,
Edie Magnus,
is here to tell us
it's a make-or-break issue now
for people who thought
they'd never have to worry.
Contrary
to what you might think,
I don't relish in being
a constant source of anxiety
for you.
I mean, I'm 31 years old.
You're my son.
You're going to be a constant
source of anxiety for me
no matter what you do.
I just want you
to find your way.
There he is. It's him.
Right here, John!
Perfect! Gorgeous!
Mr. Kennedy. Mr. Kennedy.
Mr. Kennedy.
Lovely, thank you.
Hi.
Hey. Look at you.
Did you make it in all right?
I had to give the guy 50 bucks.
He had no clue who you were.
What?
-Your face just now.
-I'm kidding.
Is this for
the resort collection?
What,
are the tiger stripes too much?
Well,
it's clear we overshot homage
and crash-landed in caricature.
What are you doing back here?
Oh, I-I forgot
the feathered hat at
the office so she brought it.
Come have drinks with us.
I had this idea last night.
You've been to Nell's?
No, I've been dying to go.
It's this fun
little place downtown.
It's really kind of terrific.
And I got in at 1:30
in the morning from Washington,
and Kelly called me.
She said, "A bunch of us are
having a little fun downtown.
Why don't you come
and join us?"
-So, I went
and met up with them
-Mm-hmm.
and we were up
most of the night.
And so on occasion, after 40,
you can still have fun.
You know,
you're gonna thank me for this.
Oh, really?
-Yeah? Oh.
-Oh, we would love
to have you for dinner.
-Oh--
-Sorry to interrupt.
John, this is Carolyn Bessette.
She's our VIP Whisperer
at the company.
Carolyn, this is John Kennedy.
VIP Whisperer,
that's quite the moniker.
What does that entail exactly?
Oh, it's a real high-wire act.
There's a cape involved.
Oh, she's underselling herself,
which is ironic
because Carolyn is responsible
for millions of dollars
in sales.
I don't doubt it.
I like your dress, by the way.
-Thank you.
-You can't help yourself,
can you?
-So I'm a bad boy.
What are you gonna do?
-I'm so sorry.
I need to steal you
for a minute.
Do you want to grab a drink?
Oh, technically I'm working.
-Well, isn't everyone here?
Wow, quite the shrewd
observation coming from
the belle of the ball.
The belle of the ball?
I know, like, five people here.
Well, you wouldn't know
that from the way
everyone's staring at you.
-Oh, I think they're all
staring at you.
You just keep that
in your back pocket,
-don't you?
I'm sure there's lots of people
waiting to talk to you.
Oh, exactly,
so you can't abandon me.
Whenever my mom
is at a party or out to dinner,
she always locks eyes intensely
with whoever she's talking to
because she says that even
the appearance of a recess
in conversation
will invite interlopers.
Well, then you better keep
appearing to look interested.
-Oh, fuck.
-What?
Nothing. Just my boss
giving me the death stare.
-Who? Calvin?
-No. Lesser boss.
Uh, I've really gotta go.
Oh, please take me with you.
I'm not sure
that's such a good look.
Ducking out of a charity event
or going home with you?
It's nice meeting you, John.
You think I can
get your number?
I don't give my number
out to strangers.
I just met you. You could be
a serial killer for all I know.
Oh, come on. That'd be
way too much of a commitment.
How about I give you my number?
That way the ball's
in your court.
I don't want
to get your hopes up.
Oh, please, I'm not above
begging in front of all
of my closest friends.
You know where I work.
Try reception.
Is he dreamy in like
an off-putting,
Manchurian-candidate
kind of way,
or like a "I can't help
but emanate sex,
it's in my perfect DNA"?
Okay, what if
he does reach out?
You know he won't.
He was just bored
and innately flirtatious.
Sexy Doorman just arrived.
Ooh.
Can we please
stop calling him that?
Hmm. Sexy Bellhop?
He's-he's actually
an aspiring model.
- That's actually
so much worse.
- Oh. Okay. Sure.
That being said, as an agent,
I'd happily advance his career
if he'd advance my orgasm.
Maybe if you unchained him
from his futon once in a while
and let us hang out with him,
we might start to like
Sexy Doorman.
I'm not ashamed of him.
He's great. We just We don't
have that much in common.
Oh. Thank you.
What the hell was that?
What? I was just saying bye.
Do you know that I came
down here to see you,
and I waited in line for, like,
an hour and now you're leaving?
I would have come
and gotten you if I knew
you were out here.
That's not really the point.
It looked like you were having
a perfectly good time in there.
See, this is where
I'm getting a little confused.
When we're in public,
you act like I don't exist,
but then when we're alone,
you're suddenly about it,
so it's just--
Michael, this is exactly why
I don't want a boyfriend, okay?
I'm-I'm accountable for people
all day, every day at work,
and when I leave,
I-I just wanna do
whatever the fuck I want
-whenever the fuck I want to.
-And whoever the fuck you want.
Look, I'm not trying to
hurt your feelings. I just
If you can't keep this, like,
cool and casual,
I think we should just
go back to being friends.
You're just gonna
leave me here?
I guess that's kinda up to you.
Hi. I'm here
to see Carolyn Bessette.
If-If you could just point me
in her general direction.
Thank you.
- Hi there.
-Hi.
- Hey.
-Hi.
Hi.
-Hi, what a terrific
surprise to s-- -Thank you.
Oh.
And then it happens
again, and then they say--
-Hi.
-Hi.
Sorry, is this a bad time?
No.
No. Uh, I was just, um
What's up?
I need a new suit.
Put your arms up for me.
You're the tailor too?
He's on his lunch break.
Typically our clients
make appointments.
I'm a 33 waist. I know that.
You're 32.
Chin, up.
Geez. Your tailor this bossy?
It'll be ready in a week.
Is there anything else?
-How about some ties?
What, you're gonna deny
my business? What kind of
VIP Whisperer are you?
A busy one.
You're right. I'm sorry.
How can I make it up to you?
By swiping your credit card.
Or
you could let me
take you to dinner.
-Oh, my God!
What was that?
What's going on?
JFK Jr. was just here.
What? No one tells me?
Oh, no, he came to see Carolyn.
Are you sure I can't start
you off with anything
while you wait?
No, no,
thank you, though.
Carolyn. Carolyn, wait.
Please, Carolyn, wait.
Don't leave.
Please, don't leave.
Please.
You didn't think, maybe,
call the restaurant?
-I was waiting for 20 minutes.
-I know. I'm sorry.
Listen, please
let me buy you dinner.
I mean, if I'm not worth
waiting for, the food is.
Please.
This your go-to date spot?
Yeah. I'm a sucker
for a laminated menu.
That's why you chose it?
The menus.
It's okay. I'm not exactly
eager to incur the wrath
of every woman in America.
Well, it's not just that.
It's gay men too.
You went a little rogue
with the order,
but I was pleasantly surprised.
Well, I went backpacking
through India
after I graduated,
and I learned very quickly that
ordering chicken tikka masala
is a surefire way
to get made fun of.
-You backpacked?
-Yeah.
-What?
Uh, nothing. I'm just
I'm curious to know
what your definition
of backpacking is.
Same thing as yours.
What, did you think I was
shuttled around on a motorcade?
Kinda, yeah.
Why India?
Well, I had no idea
what I wanted to do with
my life after I graduated,
and, uh, my mom always says
that India's the most beautiful
place she'd ever visited,
so I decided to, uh,
take some time off,
go explore the world.
God, I realize
this story sounds--
-Super relatable.
In your defense,
I'm sure most of your dates
swoon over that India story.
I wasn't trying to impress you.
No, you made that very clear
when you showed up
30 minutes late.
Oh, my God. I'm sweating.
Have you noticed?
It's not because of the food.
You know, sometimes
I find myself trying so hard
to put other people
at ease that I--
You have nothing to prove.
What do you think you'd be
doing with your life
if you weren't who you are?
I probably wouldn't be working
at the DA's office.
I don't know if
you've seen the news recently,
but I'm not exactly
a legal wunderkind.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
-It's okay.
-No, it's not.
Publishing your exam results
for other people's
entertainment
is cheap and pathetic.
Yeah, it just kind of feels
like I have this sign hung over
my head that says,
"The Hunk Flunks,"
and that's all that people see
when they look at me.
Yeah, but everyone feels like
they have a sign
over their head.
Oh, yeah? What's yours say?
I'm not gonna disclose my sign
on a first date.
Mmm.
What would you be doing?
Am I gonna be leading
the conversation at any point?
I'm not the one
being vetted here.
I guess, uh, when I think
of where it was I was happiest
is probably on stage.
Like acting?
Yeah, I did a lot of theater
in high school and college,
and I loved it.
Something about being
a character, being up on stage.
I felt like I could do
whatever I wanted,
and no one could judge me.
Why didn't you pursue it?
I did, actually sort of.
I was in a play here after
college called The Lovers.
And my mom was so scared
that she banned any critics
from attending,
so needless to say,
we had a very limited run.
-Did she like it at least?
-She never came.
-Oh
-Not because
she didn't want to,
just because it would have
created this whole circus,
and that's exactly what
she didn't want to have happen.
How old were you
when you realized you were
the son of a president?
I don't think anyone's
ever asked me that before.
I don't know, really.
To be honest,
I think I've been inundated
with so many images and stories
of my childhood
that, uh, I can't really
differentiate from
what I remember
and what I've just
been exposed to.
That's sad.
What about your parents?
Uh, my mom and stepdad
are in Greenwich.
She's a schoolteacher.
He's a doctor.
I actually introduced them
20 years ago
when I was his patient,
-and I love to
lord that over them.
-Mmm.
What about your dad?
Um, he's in White Plains.
Is he remarried?
Nope.
I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to--
No, no, no.
It's just It's not
a very interesting story.
How did you find your way
to Calvin Klein?
Um
I always wanted to make
a difference in the world.
No, I was working
at the mall. In Boston.
-At a Calvin Klein? Okay, hey.
-At a Calvin Klein, yeah.
And one day this exec
from corporate came in,
and I had no idea
they were there.
And there was this
older female customer
screaming, crying,
melting down in the dressing
room, wouldn't come out,
so I just sort of sat down on
the floor and talked her down.
Anyways,
the exec saw the whole thing,
said, "If you can handle that,
you can handle anything."
And they brought me out
for an interview in New York.
I remember in the waiting room,
there were all these sort of,
like, polished
Upper East Side girls.
And I said to the HR person,
"Look, these girls
might have a pedigree,
but I don't have a plan B
or a trust fund
to fall back on"
Sorry. And no offense.
You know, "I have--
I have to make this work."
And they offered me the job
right then and there.
I can see why
Calvin sings your praises.
Shit. Somebody stole my bike.
Well, was it locked?
Uh, no.
I'm sor
I'm sorry.
I don't mean to laugh.
It's just, what did
you think was gonna happen?
-That civility would prevail?
-In New York City?
Don't you live here?
Now I gotta buy another one.
How many bikes have you lost?
-Ballpark?
- Do you want
a cigarette?
-No, thanks.
I've already had my one
for the day.
One?
You have one cigarette a day?
Not all the time, but if I do,
I try to limit it to one.
It's a
discipline thing.
Mmm.
Gotcha. So you have
discipline when it comes
to tobacco, just
not other people's time?
-I said I was sorry.
-Yeah.
You said it like you were
expecting forgiveness,
not asking for it.
This is me.
Thought I had more time.
More time for what?
Can I see you again?
I had a nice time tonight.
So is that a yes?
Night, John.
Did you sleep with her?
-No.
-Oh.
No, she barely even let me
take her out to dinner.
I had to buy a suit.
I've never seen you have to
woo someone before.
This is like watching,
uh, an animal dance.
All I want to do is call her,
but I don't want to
come on too strong.
What?
You're in your head.
Ladies and gentlemen,
the uncrowned prince
is beside himself.
-Shut up, Anthony.
-Does she know about the bike?
-No.
What are you doing here?
Missed you.
I shouldn't have gone back
to California. You were right.
You'd think after
40 years of attending
these family functions,
I'd be unflappable, but no.
I still somehow revert back
to that same old 22-year-old
doe-eyed debutante.
Have you heard
from your brother?
He cannot be late.
Last I heard
he was coming, but
Andrew, do you know if John
arranged for a car service?
Yes, ma'am. He and Ms. Hannah
scheduled one
for this afternoon.
What did you
Did you know about this?
I'm not your intelligence
agent, Mother. John and I
keep our own confidences.
Turn the car around,
please, Andrew.
What? Are you serious?
I'm not going to smile and make
small talk with the two of them
like this prolonged saga
shouldn't have ended years ago.
So your solution is to boycott?
Consider my hands washed.
-How'd it go?
I think
Cindy's our best bet.
To me, she's
the quintessential supermodel.
I agree.
Girl-next-door, prom queen,
all rolled into one.
Sorry, I don't
I don't mean to interrupt.
No, you're fine. We were just
talking about the new campaign.
What do you think
of Cindy Crawford?
Are these the girls
you passed on?
Yeah,
that's the dumping ground.
What about Kate Moss?
Well, she's cute,
but no one knows who she is.
Exactly.
She's almost unknowable.
She's guarded, elusive.
She's not trying to sell
you anything or ham it up
for the camera. She's
She's just letting you in.
Just enough
'cause she knows better
than to give it all away.
Well, let's bring her in.
And, Carolyn,
I want you there when we do.
Well done.
We turned
the world upside down.
Yeah? How did we do that? Yeah.
Give him a stick? Yeah.
- Yeah?
Round and round.
She wants to marry me.
I'm sure she does.
You know, you only make things
more difficult for me
when you pull stunts like that.
Of the long list
of issues plaguing
your relationship,
I'd say my stunts reside
somewhere near the very bottom.
I've been
thinking about what
you asked me the other night.
About who it is I see you with.
I know you think
I'm overbearing,
but only one of us knows
what it's like to marry
into this family.
To have to be perfect in order
to offset your partner's
imperfections--
imperfections that you,
more than anyone,
bear the brunt of.
You think that if you find
someone who's already
in the public eye
that you'll be better equipped
to withstand the scrutiny,
but there isn't enough exposure
in the world
to prepare a woman
to be your wife.
Plus, anyone who's already
made a name for themselves
will invariably
resent trading it for yours,
no matter how pretty
it looks on their letterhead.
She'll be under the illusion
that she's entering
into a partnership
when, in reality,
she'll be orbiting you
just like everybody else.
Routinely made to feel
like an obstacle
or a stepping stone.
See, you have a gift, John.
One that can't be taught
or bequeathed,
one that allows you to alter
the composition of any room
you walk into.
Now, you don't want someone
who's looking to share
in that power.
You want someone
to help you wield it.
Someone who doesn't
feel beholden to you
for choosing them.
Someone who loves you
in spite of your last name.
Now, I don't know
who that person is
but I know who it isn't.
- Carolyn!
- Carolyn!
Hey.
- Carolyn, over here!
- Come on, Carolyn!
I need a different color.
Sorry, I just
This isn't gonna work for where
I'm going. They'll, um--
Do you want
a different shade or--
No.
Let's go
with something safe. Um
A neutral
A shade of nude. Sorry.
Your sister-in-law
is downstairs.
Tell her I'll be down in a
minute. I just need to change.
Thanks, Rosemarie.
Carolyn! Carolyn!
I don't want her holding
this weekend over me
like she does every
other family function.
She's trying,
John.
This is her trying.
Just give her some grace.
I just It's a wedding,
for Christ's sake.
She acts as if I'm asking her
to attend the Democratic
National Convention.
Did you stay
at the hotel again?
It's not like
she's begging me to come home.
What happened?
Supposed to leave an hour ago.
It's a summer Friday.
The tunnel was a parking lot.
Hi.
You haven't been on time a day
in your life, but when it
inconveniences you--
I'm just saying we're
gonna miss the welcome drinks.
My family's
gonna throw a hissy fit.
They're gonna find a reason
to throw one no matter what.
-Guys, I'm not doing this
with you.
-So if you wanna go there--
Okay, we both agreed to give
each other the benefit
of the doubt.
-Where's Jay?
-He couldn't make it.
-Who's Jay?
-The instructor.
-And where are his crutches?
He complains about his recovery
time, and yet he doesn't
bring them--
Pick your battles.
I'm sorry.
I'm just anxious.
I love you.
I appreciate you being here.
I love you too.
-Good.
Let's go.
Essex ground 9253
November, ready to taxi
with Mike northeast bound.
November, target is clear
for takeoff, runway 22.
Runway 22,
cleared for takeoff.
Saratoga 9253 November.
A pack, please.
Avert your eyes.
How was
that nightcap?
I ended up at the Tunnel
rolling around in the ball pit
with Mickey Rourke.
-Like hooking up?
-I don't know.
I don't remember.
But the sun was coming up
when I left, so now I'm just
bracing for impact.
You go home with that guy?
What guy?
The hot, tan one you were
talking to with the forearms
and the bad jeans?
I thought I saw
you guys leave together?
I just went home.
I was so tired.
Ugh. You're so fucking
cagey sometimes.
Here I am pouring my heart out.
What do you want me
to tell you?
-That you fucked him.
And that I'm not alone
on my path to self-destruction.
Hold it, please.
By the way, I wore
your Egyptian Musk last night,
and I'm not kidding,
three different guys, like,
inhaled me.
One of them said
I smelled like a Laundromat,
which, like, weird,
but I'll take it.
Shh.
Grace, he could hear you.
I thought the rule about not
talking in the elevator was
more of a myth.
-Like his sexuality.
-Shh. Shh.
He has
cameras everywhere.
-Give me a raise, motherfucker.
I didn't.
I left two.
Fuck. Grace.
Why would he bother
pursuing you if he knows
he doesn't have to?
I've tried playing hard to get,
and apparently I play it
too well.
Come here.
Come here.
Look at me.
You're beautiful.
Okay?
Hey.
Exploit his insecurities.
I read that somewhere.
-Until when?
-Until you're bored of him,
or he's too old to leave you.
Can we save the powwow
for after work, please?
We need those looks
that we pulled for Demi
pressed, bagged, and labeled,
and her PR rep is gonna
be here in, like, an hour.
Let's go. Chop chop.
Thank you.
And don't forget
that we have that fitting
with Annette at 11:00.
Prime example. Tanya tries
too hard to be authoritative.
Therefore, I have no respect
for her authority.
I feel like
her prisoner in this showroom,
as much as I love helping
Diane Sawyer accessorize.
Just tell Calvin you want
to move to PR. He loves you.
Oh, yeah.
Company's hemorrhaging money,
and he just got out of rehab.
Now's the time
to make it all about me.
I haven't even
been here a year.
Well, you used to be folding
his sweaters at the mall,
and now look where you are.
-I miss the mall.
Yo, this look like a library?
Fifty cents, man.
Yo, you get what you needed?
John Kennedy Jr.
has flunked his bar exam
for a second time.
His courthouse
days may be numbered
for John F. Kennedy Jr.
John F.
Kennedy Jr.'s flunked the New
York State bar exam again.
Kennedy will
lose his job.
Kennedy's last chance.
John F.
Kennedy Jr. is facing a long,
grueling prospect of studies
the dashing son
of the late president
He may have been
called the sexiest man alive,
but tonight he was
just plain embarrassed.
Strike three
and he's out of his job
as assistant DA.
What's next
for the famous heir?
"So what if he flubbed
the bar exam twice?"
Twice is in parentheticals.
"America's uncrowned prince
is facing 30
with a steady girlfriend,
fabulous looks,
even a movie role.
But now it's time
to hit those law books."
If it makes you feel any
better, anyone who knows you
knows that you don't have
a steady girlfriend.
Fuck off.
I can't show my face around
the city with these headlines
everywhere.
But you'll show your dick
to everyone at the gym.
Apparently this
is all I'm good for.
Well, as your cousin,
obviously I disagree.
Also, I'm an actual prince
w-with a title and everything.
W-What is this obsession
with anointing you?
You know, the funny thing is
when I first saw the headline,
"The Hunk Flunks,"
I thought to myself, "Wow,
this is bad, but it couldn't
possibly get any worse."
You'll take it again.
The DA's office has
a three-strike policy
for their assistants.
If I fail again,
I'm out of a job.
Well, then I guess
you better not fail.
I-I mean,
it's it's beautiful. Uh
Well, we can also try it
with a shawl. We can do
different styling options.
Is it the fit
you're bumping up against
or the dress itself?
Both. N-Neither.
I'm sorry, I'm really not very
good at this kind of thing.
Um, what do you think?
Oh, I-I think we can find you
something better.
-Really?
-Yes.
You know right away
if a dress works.
The confidence
should wash over you.
Well, Calvin specifically had
this dress in mind for her,
Carolyn,
so why don't we try it
with the shawl?
We can go from there.
I'm so sorry.
I was stuck on the phone
with David Geffen.
-How are you?
- Hi.
Let's have a look.
How do you feel?
Well, I mean,
it's, um-- it's beautiful.
Uh, but Carolyn was
just saying we could try
some other options.
Yes, the collection's
so wide-ranging, I just
I just figured
we could pull some alts.
Remind me, this is for the,
um, Bugsy premiere, right?
Yeah.
I mean
This is something
a little more charming.
You know? It's a sexier option.
I had an idea.
Why don't we let Calvin decide?
Well, what,
does she not work here too?
N-No, I
One second.
Calvin designed this suit
as part of the menswear
collection,
and I'm obsessed with it.
The detailing is just
Tanya.
Here.
Okay.
Okay. So obviously,
we'd have to take it in a bit,
but I think it's a bold choice,
and a fun nod to the film noir,
gangster genre.
I love it. Can I please
take her home with me?
- O-Okay.
Are you and Warren planning on
walking the carpet together?
Because-- I-I only ask 'cause
I wouldn't want your outfits
to clash.
All eyes are gonna be on you.
If he needs a different
shade of suit, he'll survive.
Mm-hmm.
I saw his name
on the guest list
for the Amazon fundraiser.
-Are you gonna be there?
-Oh, I can't.
I have a-a stage reading
at Circle in the Square.
Well, every major
designer is gonna be there,
so if I see Warren Beatty
in Armani or Ralph Lauren,
-you'll be hearing from me.
Did you want to pull
some accessories for Annette?
Sure.
No, I was talking to Carolyn.
You do know those pictures
don't help with
the nepotism charges.
They said the same shit
when your father appointed me
US Attorney
of the Southern District
of New York 30 years ago.
Do you think anybody's
questioning my credentials now?
How you holding up?
Great. Why? Did something
incredibly embarrassing
happen recently?
At least they called you hunky.
I'm not sure that
qualifies as a silver lining.
Look, you'll take it
a third time. You'll pass it.
This will all
be ancient history.
I can still recite
the editorials about
my high school report card.
I can assure you it won't be.
And by the way, I'm well aware
that this is the least
compelling sob story
in the world.
You cannot let the people
around you narrate your
successes and your setbacks.
At a certain point you have
to decide how you want to feel
about them.
Her assistant's picking that up
at 3:00, so just double-check
and make sure it's good to go.
It's ready. I got it.
Uh, and did that jacket
come back from the tailor yet?
- Y-Yeah.
-Hey, Tanya.
Um, do you happen to know if
there are any extra tickets
to that Amazon fundraiser?
Don't confuse his
little pat on the back earlier
for your status
at this company.
You're a saleswoman,
Carolyn. That's it.
Strong candidate
for an exorcism.
Whatever, I'm still going.
Really? What if she sees you?
If she wants to try
and sideline me, have at it.
Fellas, the hyenas have set up
camp, so don't forget
to suck in.
Let's go easy on John,
all right?
Can't have America finding out
their favorite son
has butterfingers.
Eat my ass, Colin.
Hey, I'd love to go where
only Madonna's gone before.
- Oh!
Hey, hey,
we have an odd number.
Then I'll be designated QB.
Oh, so both teams can suck?
Talk some shit
out of the gate. Let's go.
- All right,
let's go.
Hey, hang on a sec.
Hey, Troy. I thought
I burned you
in Columbus Circle.
I'm like white on rice, Johnny.
Prove it. We're down a man.
Hey, Murph, throw me
the fucking ball, okay?
Up the side, up the side.
Watch Happy Feet right here.
Probably not.
Of course not.
Mom
-Hi. Sorry I'm late.
- Ah.
-Where are you coming from?
-Well, I had
a touch football game.
At least
make something up.
-Hats off at the table, please.
Is your salmon cold?
-Oh, you didn't
have to wait for me.
-We didn't. It's just cold.
-Thank you, Eugie.
-Of course.
So is everyone planning
on attending Teddy Jr.'s
wedding this weekend?
I have to work, unfortunately.
-I'll be there.
-Really?
Can you imagine if I said no?
Uncle Teddy would probably
dispatch the Navy SEALs.
-Well, you two
can be each other's date.
How do you know I'm not
bringing someone already?
Well,
the wedding's in four days.
You cannot just spring
your flavor of the month
on them last minute.
He's trying to get a rise out
of you. Please don't take
the bait.
Well, maybe I should just
become celibate
and join the priesthood.
People magazine's "Sexiest
Priest Alive" doesn't quite
have the same ring to it.
Thank you, Eugie.
I see you're eating meat again.
Well,
I never swore off meat, Mother.
I was experimenting
with a vegetarian diet
because Daryl
made a very valid case for it.
Well, either way,
it wasn't sustainable.
My relationship or my diet?
You know, maybe if
she'd been made to feel
a bit more welcome--
-Sweetheart--
-And despite your impressions,
Daryl actually does care
what you think of her.
Of course she does.
She's an actress. She cares
what everyone thinks of her.
What decade are you living in?
She's an artist, Mom.
Oh, yes, I saw that recently
she played a 50-foot giant.
Maybe she'll invite you
to the Oscars.
Why don't you
just save us all a lot of time
and tell me exactly who you'd
like me to bring home to you,
'cause I guarantee inevitably
you'll find something wrong
with them too.
-There are lots of girls.
-Yeah, like who?
You act as if I'm the only
thing standing between you
and happily ever after.
Yeah, well,
she's back in LA now, so
Bed-hopping with rock stars.
-Mom.
I love how
you pose these questions
like you don't obsessively
monitor my personal life.
Apple doesn't fall far.
Hey, I read the shit that gets
thrown in my face, all right?
Not everyone's
awarded the same privacy.
Well, that's one way
of looking at it.
Meaning what, Ed?
Would you prefer
that I not be invested
in my child's personal life?
Well, you never seem
to harangue Caroline
for her life's choices.
I think all of
my psychiatrists would
argue otherwise.
Your sister is
settled down with children.
Her personal life isn't
chronicled in every tabloid
in the country
like it's
an episode of Santa Barbara.
Yeah, this coming from a woman
whose second marriage was
condemned by the Pope.
I worked too hard
to watch you be
sucked into this pervasive
narrative of entitlement
and recklessness
that's plagued every
other member of this family.
Good evening.
Dan Rather reporting.
Former Massachusetts Senator,
Paul Tsongas,
announced his decision today,
again, at a news conference
in Boston.
Tsongas said
he will not reenter the race
for the Democratic
presidential nomination.
One thing everybody's talking
about this election year
is the lack
of affordable health care.
CBS News health correspondent,
Edie Magnus,
is here to tell us
it's a make-or-break issue now
for people who thought
they'd never have to worry.
Contrary
to what you might think,
I don't relish in being
a constant source of anxiety
for you.
I mean, I'm 31 years old.
You're my son.
You're going to be a constant
source of anxiety for me
no matter what you do.
I just want you
to find your way.
There he is. It's him.
Right here, John!
Perfect! Gorgeous!
Mr. Kennedy. Mr. Kennedy.
Mr. Kennedy.
Lovely, thank you.
Hi.
Hey. Look at you.
Did you make it in all right?
I had to give the guy 50 bucks.
He had no clue who you were.
What?
-Your face just now.
-I'm kidding.
Is this for
the resort collection?
What,
are the tiger stripes too much?
Well,
it's clear we overshot homage
and crash-landed in caricature.
What are you doing back here?
Oh, I-I forgot
the feathered hat at
the office so she brought it.
Come have drinks with us.
I had this idea last night.
You've been to Nell's?
No, I've been dying to go.
It's this fun
little place downtown.
It's really kind of terrific.
And I got in at 1:30
in the morning from Washington,
and Kelly called me.
She said, "A bunch of us are
having a little fun downtown.
Why don't you come
and join us?"
-So, I went
and met up with them
-Mm-hmm.
and we were up
most of the night.
And so on occasion, after 40,
you can still have fun.
You know,
you're gonna thank me for this.
Oh, really?
-Yeah? Oh.
-Oh, we would love
to have you for dinner.
-Oh--
-Sorry to interrupt.
John, this is Carolyn Bessette.
She's our VIP Whisperer
at the company.
Carolyn, this is John Kennedy.
VIP Whisperer,
that's quite the moniker.
What does that entail exactly?
Oh, it's a real high-wire act.
There's a cape involved.
Oh, she's underselling herself,
which is ironic
because Carolyn is responsible
for millions of dollars
in sales.
I don't doubt it.
I like your dress, by the way.
-Thank you.
-You can't help yourself,
can you?
-So I'm a bad boy.
What are you gonna do?
-I'm so sorry.
I need to steal you
for a minute.
Do you want to grab a drink?
Oh, technically I'm working.
-Well, isn't everyone here?
Wow, quite the shrewd
observation coming from
the belle of the ball.
The belle of the ball?
I know, like, five people here.
Well, you wouldn't know
that from the way
everyone's staring at you.
-Oh, I think they're all
staring at you.
You just keep that
in your back pocket,
-don't you?
I'm sure there's lots of people
waiting to talk to you.
Oh, exactly,
so you can't abandon me.
Whenever my mom
is at a party or out to dinner,
she always locks eyes intensely
with whoever she's talking to
because she says that even
the appearance of a recess
in conversation
will invite interlopers.
Well, then you better keep
appearing to look interested.
-Oh, fuck.
-What?
Nothing. Just my boss
giving me the death stare.
-Who? Calvin?
-No. Lesser boss.
Uh, I've really gotta go.
Oh, please take me with you.
I'm not sure
that's such a good look.
Ducking out of a charity event
or going home with you?
It's nice meeting you, John.
You think I can
get your number?
I don't give my number
out to strangers.
I just met you. You could be
a serial killer for all I know.
Oh, come on. That'd be
way too much of a commitment.
How about I give you my number?
That way the ball's
in your court.
I don't want
to get your hopes up.
Oh, please, I'm not above
begging in front of all
of my closest friends.
You know where I work.
Try reception.
Is he dreamy in like
an off-putting,
Manchurian-candidate
kind of way,
or like a "I can't help
but emanate sex,
it's in my perfect DNA"?
Okay, what if
he does reach out?
You know he won't.
He was just bored
and innately flirtatious.
Sexy Doorman just arrived.
Ooh.
Can we please
stop calling him that?
Hmm. Sexy Bellhop?
He's-he's actually
an aspiring model.
- That's actually
so much worse.
- Oh. Okay. Sure.
That being said, as an agent,
I'd happily advance his career
if he'd advance my orgasm.
Maybe if you unchained him
from his futon once in a while
and let us hang out with him,
we might start to like
Sexy Doorman.
I'm not ashamed of him.
He's great. We just We don't
have that much in common.
Oh. Thank you.
What the hell was that?
What? I was just saying bye.
Do you know that I came
down here to see you,
and I waited in line for, like,
an hour and now you're leaving?
I would have come
and gotten you if I knew
you were out here.
That's not really the point.
It looked like you were having
a perfectly good time in there.
See, this is where
I'm getting a little confused.
When we're in public,
you act like I don't exist,
but then when we're alone,
you're suddenly about it,
so it's just--
Michael, this is exactly why
I don't want a boyfriend, okay?
I'm-I'm accountable for people
all day, every day at work,
and when I leave,
I-I just wanna do
whatever the fuck I want
-whenever the fuck I want to.
-And whoever the fuck you want.
Look, I'm not trying to
hurt your feelings. I just
If you can't keep this, like,
cool and casual,
I think we should just
go back to being friends.
You're just gonna
leave me here?
I guess that's kinda up to you.
Hi. I'm here
to see Carolyn Bessette.
If-If you could just point me
in her general direction.
Thank you.
- Hi there.
-Hi.
- Hey.
-Hi.
Hi.
-Hi, what a terrific
surprise to s-- -Thank you.
Oh.
And then it happens
again, and then they say--
-Hi.
-Hi.
Sorry, is this a bad time?
No.
No. Uh, I was just, um
What's up?
I need a new suit.
Put your arms up for me.
You're the tailor too?
He's on his lunch break.
Typically our clients
make appointments.
I'm a 33 waist. I know that.
You're 32.
Chin, up.
Geez. Your tailor this bossy?
It'll be ready in a week.
Is there anything else?
-How about some ties?
What, you're gonna deny
my business? What kind of
VIP Whisperer are you?
A busy one.
You're right. I'm sorry.
How can I make it up to you?
By swiping your credit card.
Or
you could let me
take you to dinner.
-Oh, my God!
What was that?
What's going on?
JFK Jr. was just here.
What? No one tells me?
Oh, no, he came to see Carolyn.
Are you sure I can't start
you off with anything
while you wait?
No, no,
thank you, though.
Carolyn. Carolyn, wait.
Please, Carolyn, wait.
Don't leave.
Please, don't leave.
Please.
You didn't think, maybe,
call the restaurant?
-I was waiting for 20 minutes.
-I know. I'm sorry.
Listen, please
let me buy you dinner.
I mean, if I'm not worth
waiting for, the food is.
Please.
This your go-to date spot?
Yeah. I'm a sucker
for a laminated menu.
That's why you chose it?
The menus.
It's okay. I'm not exactly
eager to incur the wrath
of every woman in America.
Well, it's not just that.
It's gay men too.
You went a little rogue
with the order,
but I was pleasantly surprised.
Well, I went backpacking
through India
after I graduated,
and I learned very quickly that
ordering chicken tikka masala
is a surefire way
to get made fun of.
-You backpacked?
-Yeah.
-What?
Uh, nothing. I'm just
I'm curious to know
what your definition
of backpacking is.
Same thing as yours.
What, did you think I was
shuttled around on a motorcade?
Kinda, yeah.
Why India?
Well, I had no idea
what I wanted to do with
my life after I graduated,
and, uh, my mom always says
that India's the most beautiful
place she'd ever visited,
so I decided to, uh,
take some time off,
go explore the world.
God, I realize
this story sounds--
-Super relatable.
In your defense,
I'm sure most of your dates
swoon over that India story.
I wasn't trying to impress you.
No, you made that very clear
when you showed up
30 minutes late.
Oh, my God. I'm sweating.
Have you noticed?
It's not because of the food.
You know, sometimes
I find myself trying so hard
to put other people
at ease that I--
You have nothing to prove.
What do you think you'd be
doing with your life
if you weren't who you are?
I probably wouldn't be working
at the DA's office.
I don't know if
you've seen the news recently,
but I'm not exactly
a legal wunderkind.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
-It's okay.
-No, it's not.
Publishing your exam results
for other people's
entertainment
is cheap and pathetic.
Yeah, it just kind of feels
like I have this sign hung over
my head that says,
"The Hunk Flunks,"
and that's all that people see
when they look at me.
Yeah, but everyone feels like
they have a sign
over their head.
Oh, yeah? What's yours say?
I'm not gonna disclose my sign
on a first date.
Mmm.
What would you be doing?
Am I gonna be leading
the conversation at any point?
I'm not the one
being vetted here.
I guess, uh, when I think
of where it was I was happiest
is probably on stage.
Like acting?
Yeah, I did a lot of theater
in high school and college,
and I loved it.
Something about being
a character, being up on stage.
I felt like I could do
whatever I wanted,
and no one could judge me.
Why didn't you pursue it?
I did, actually sort of.
I was in a play here after
college called The Lovers.
And my mom was so scared
that she banned any critics
from attending,
so needless to say,
we had a very limited run.
-Did she like it at least?
-She never came.
-Oh
-Not because
she didn't want to,
just because it would have
created this whole circus,
and that's exactly what
she didn't want to have happen.
How old were you
when you realized you were
the son of a president?
I don't think anyone's
ever asked me that before.
I don't know, really.
To be honest,
I think I've been inundated
with so many images and stories
of my childhood
that, uh, I can't really
differentiate from
what I remember
and what I've just
been exposed to.
That's sad.
What about your parents?
Uh, my mom and stepdad
are in Greenwich.
She's a schoolteacher.
He's a doctor.
I actually introduced them
20 years ago
when I was his patient,
-and I love to
lord that over them.
-Mmm.
What about your dad?
Um, he's in White Plains.
Is he remarried?
Nope.
I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to--
No, no, no.
It's just It's not
a very interesting story.
How did you find your way
to Calvin Klein?
Um
I always wanted to make
a difference in the world.
No, I was working
at the mall. In Boston.
-At a Calvin Klein? Okay, hey.
-At a Calvin Klein, yeah.
And one day this exec
from corporate came in,
and I had no idea
they were there.
And there was this
older female customer
screaming, crying,
melting down in the dressing
room, wouldn't come out,
so I just sort of sat down on
the floor and talked her down.
Anyways,
the exec saw the whole thing,
said, "If you can handle that,
you can handle anything."
And they brought me out
for an interview in New York.
I remember in the waiting room,
there were all these sort of,
like, polished
Upper East Side girls.
And I said to the HR person,
"Look, these girls
might have a pedigree,
but I don't have a plan B
or a trust fund
to fall back on"
Sorry. And no offense.
You know, "I have--
I have to make this work."
And they offered me the job
right then and there.
I can see why
Calvin sings your praises.
Shit. Somebody stole my bike.
Well, was it locked?
Uh, no.
I'm sor
I'm sorry.
I don't mean to laugh.
It's just, what did
you think was gonna happen?
-That civility would prevail?
-In New York City?
Don't you live here?
Now I gotta buy another one.
How many bikes have you lost?
-Ballpark?
- Do you want
a cigarette?
-No, thanks.
I've already had my one
for the day.
One?
You have one cigarette a day?
Not all the time, but if I do,
I try to limit it to one.
It's a
discipline thing.
Mmm.
Gotcha. So you have
discipline when it comes
to tobacco, just
not other people's time?
-I said I was sorry.
-Yeah.
You said it like you were
expecting forgiveness,
not asking for it.
This is me.
Thought I had more time.
More time for what?
Can I see you again?
I had a nice time tonight.
So is that a yes?
Night, John.
Did you sleep with her?
-No.
-Oh.
No, she barely even let me
take her out to dinner.
I had to buy a suit.
I've never seen you have to
woo someone before.
This is like watching,
uh, an animal dance.
All I want to do is call her,
but I don't want to
come on too strong.
What?
You're in your head.
Ladies and gentlemen,
the uncrowned prince
is beside himself.
-Shut up, Anthony.
-Does she know about the bike?
-No.
What are you doing here?
Missed you.
I shouldn't have gone back
to California. You were right.
You'd think after
40 years of attending
these family functions,
I'd be unflappable, but no.
I still somehow revert back
to that same old 22-year-old
doe-eyed debutante.
Have you heard
from your brother?
He cannot be late.
Last I heard
he was coming, but
Andrew, do you know if John
arranged for a car service?
Yes, ma'am. He and Ms. Hannah
scheduled one
for this afternoon.
What did you
Did you know about this?
I'm not your intelligence
agent, Mother. John and I
keep our own confidences.
Turn the car around,
please, Andrew.
What? Are you serious?
I'm not going to smile and make
small talk with the two of them
like this prolonged saga
shouldn't have ended years ago.
So your solution is to boycott?
Consider my hands washed.
-How'd it go?
I think
Cindy's our best bet.
To me, she's
the quintessential supermodel.
I agree.
Girl-next-door, prom queen,
all rolled into one.
Sorry, I don't
I don't mean to interrupt.
No, you're fine. We were just
talking about the new campaign.
What do you think
of Cindy Crawford?
Are these the girls
you passed on?
Yeah,
that's the dumping ground.
What about Kate Moss?
Well, she's cute,
but no one knows who she is.
Exactly.
She's almost unknowable.
She's guarded, elusive.
She's not trying to sell
you anything or ham it up
for the camera. She's
She's just letting you in.
Just enough
'cause she knows better
than to give it all away.
Well, let's bring her in.
And, Carolyn,
I want you there when we do.
Well done.
We turned
the world upside down.
Yeah? How did we do that? Yeah.
Give him a stick? Yeah.
- Yeah?
Round and round.
She wants to marry me.
I'm sure she does.
You know, you only make things
more difficult for me
when you pull stunts like that.
Of the long list
of issues plaguing
your relationship,
I'd say my stunts reside
somewhere near the very bottom.
I've been
thinking about what
you asked me the other night.
About who it is I see you with.
I know you think
I'm overbearing,
but only one of us knows
what it's like to marry
into this family.
To have to be perfect in order
to offset your partner's
imperfections--
imperfections that you,
more than anyone,
bear the brunt of.
You think that if you find
someone who's already
in the public eye
that you'll be better equipped
to withstand the scrutiny,
but there isn't enough exposure
in the world
to prepare a woman
to be your wife.
Plus, anyone who's already
made a name for themselves
will invariably
resent trading it for yours,
no matter how pretty
it looks on their letterhead.
She'll be under the illusion
that she's entering
into a partnership
when, in reality,
she'll be orbiting you
just like everybody else.
Routinely made to feel
like an obstacle
or a stepping stone.
See, you have a gift, John.
One that can't be taught
or bequeathed,
one that allows you to alter
the composition of any room
you walk into.
Now, you don't want someone
who's looking to share
in that power.
You want someone
to help you wield it.
Someone who doesn't
feel beholden to you
for choosing them.
Someone who loves you
in spite of your last name.
Now, I don't know
who that person is
but I know who it isn't.