Adventure Time: Side Quests (2026) s01e02 Episode Script

[mouse squeaks]
[penguins chirp]
[screeches]
[opening theme song playing]
Adventure Time ♪
Come on, grab your friends ♪
We'll go
to very distant lands ♪
With Jake the dog
and Finn the human ♪
The fun will never end
Adventure Time ♪
[whispering] Side Quests.
- [Finn breathing heavily]
- [Jake straining]
Hok, hokk! Okay, pull!
[straining] Service!
Yeah, man! Pull, pull, pull!
[straining, groaning]
[panting, spitting]
- Ooh
- C'mon, dude. Pull, pull!
Hey, get outta here! [laughs]
[panting, spitting]
[grunts]
[laughs] Nice.
Ope-- This is the last one!
[spits]
[groans]
[laughs] Hey, why's your
spit so hard?
Cuz I'm the champ!
Yeah, y-you should
drink more water.
[panting] Don't need to.
Champion blood, baby!
[echoing voice]
Ooh! A champeen, you say?
[wind blowing]
Mmm
Sometimes this place
really freaks me out, man.
- [crunching]
- [voice groaning]
Oh, whoa.
[Finn] Sorry, bug dude.
Didn't mean to step on you.
[bug wailing]
You okay?
No! I have
suffered a besmirching.
Oh, that's neat. Good luck!
A bees-mirching?
Woah are you like,
a little fancy dude?
Oh, okay. We're engaging
- I am Bellamy Bartholomew Bug.
- Tight, tight.
But that sniveling worm
Elody Drakard,
has challenged me for
the hand of my beloved lady,
Penelope Bugsworth.
[heart beating]
[Bellamy] I love her so
Oh, man. She's beautiful.
Dude, she's a bug.
Though my heart
rages for dear Penelope,
I cannot myself
duel for her hand.
For I am a dandy gent.
Why don't ya just
tell sweet lady P how you feel?
Ha!!! That simply is
not how it is done
- Why?
- It simply isn't how it's done!
[wailing] Oh-hoo-hoo!
I must find a worthy champeen!
Um, sorry, guy, we don't really
go in for that fancy-shmancy--
Cram, yeah!
I'm all about that junk!
Oh, no, no, no, no. Crass boy!
I must find a proper champeen.
Good day!
Great! That all
sounds bad anyway.
No, Jake, that sounds rad!
Hey, I'll be your guy, dude.
Just tell me, like,
the fancy rules
and I'll crush
your rival's champion!
Hmm I do suppose it would be
doubly, nay, triply impressive
If i polish you,
a common peasant cur,
into a proper gent!
Ah-ha-ha!
My champeen you shall be!
Yes!
Jake, you hear that?
Yeah, I heard it.
See you later.
[birds screeching]
Man, he really
hates fancy stuff.
[Bellamy] Lesson One!
[squirming]
[screams] This stuff reeks!
Did I do good?
[dramatic wailing]
[Bellamy] Lesson Two!
Mm-hm? Mm?
Aw, cram!
[dramatic wailing]
[Bellamy] Lesson Three!
[straining]
What am I even
supposed to do in this?
Remain.
- Dude, I can't even--
- Remain!
[Bellamy] And now, Lesson--
[Finn] Aw, yeah!
It's finally sword time!
Yeah-ha-ha!
Hmm.
I can't battle
with this wimpy thing.
Ah-ah-ahh ah!
The sword is ceremonial.
What in the [grunts]
Watch closely.
[humming]
Do you see? Ah!
See what I did there?
Whoa. A-Ah! What do you see?
Uh
Step 1-2! And hand 1-2
and step 1-2 and hand!
And hand! And hand!
Hand, hand, hand!
Functional quadratics dude,
I'm trying!
Don't yell at me.
[panting] All right, all right.
So, it's--
[deep voice] Bellamy Bug!
[gasps] Oh, no! Not now!
Bellamy Bug.
Is that you, you ol' raspberry?
Elody, my nemesis.
Ooh, nemesis?
[whispering] Want me to
spit on 'em?
No, no, no, no, no,
that's quite alright
[gasps] Who in bug landy
is this farce of a dandy?
Oh, I'm Finn. Bellamy's champ!
[laughs]
Bellamy, please.
This dirty, round-faced,
gap-tooth crass boy
is your champion?
[yelling] That's it!
I've had it!
Ya-la-la-la-la-!
Da-da-da-da! Jake was right!
Yah! This fancy stuff stinks.
I'm outta here, B!
[laughing] Yes!
Flee, crass boy!
I don't blame you at all!
For you haven't
a bug's chance in a barn fire
- to defeat my champion.
- [footmen] Wee!
[drum roll]
[bagpipes playing]
Indubitably!
What? Jake!
[Elody] Now, now.
That's Sir Jake.
M'lord.
What the heck, man?
You said you weren't
into this fancy junk.
Yeah, but that was before
I knew about the free root beer
- and tummy rubs, dude.
- [footmen] Hup hup hup
[slurping]
- Ahh!
- Wee!
Oh, yeah!
I'm at the belly rub buffet.
[laughing]
[both laughing]
Man, thinkin' with
your belly again?
That's how they get ya!
Now, c'mon.
[straining] Let's take
this dumb thing
off of you!
Unhand me, crass boy!
- [haughtily] Ooh!
- Jake?
Did you just 'crass boy' me?
Heh-heh [coughs]
That's Sir Jake, the Dog,
Gentle-Dandy.
And I'm going to squash you
at the tournament tomorrow!
[Elody] Yes! There is no way
you will defeat him
in the duel, crass boy!!!
If you dare to even show up.
- Ta-ta till the duel, dude.
- [Elody laughing]
Parting laughter!
[laughing maniacally]
[sobbing] It's hopeless,
crass boy.
You'll never be
as fancy as Sir Jake.
- Listen up, Bellamy.
- Huh?
This fancy stuff
might be super dumb
That's my whole way of--
and I may resent every
aspect of this stupid duel,
but Jake just
besmirch-ed my assets.
And this crass boy's
about to be-smirchin' back.
Huh? How?
I'm gonna learn
all that stuff in your Uh
Uh, book?
Yeah! [laughs]
Book!
[giggles]
- [Finn laughing]
- It's the same plan again
but maybe this time
it will work.
- Watch out, Jake!
- [Bellamy laughing]
[announcer] It is time
for the duel.
[Spokesbug] Come all,
come everybug!
The Duel of Destiny
has arrived.
Gentlebug, Elody Drakard
and Bellamy Bug III.
Two dandies vying for the hand
of Lady Penelope Bugsworth!
- [Penelope vocalizing]
- [all gasp]
Behold!
She arrives!
Oh, I am so eligible!
[chuckles]
And now the champions!
Representing Elody,
Jake, the dog!
Indubitably!
[crowd] Yeah!
Marvelous!
Huzzah!
And representing Bellamy
Ho-Hoo!
It's Finn
The human.
[crowd cheering]
[gasps] That is crass boy?
Crass boy no more,
you powdered donut.
And we're off.
[Spokesbug] Jake starts his
program with a courtly bow.
Maintaining contact
with his staff
- And he's up!
- [crowd gasps]
And now, Finn!
He opens with a pirouette.
Tight spiral, modest pace.
[Elody] Fall! Fall! Fall! Fall!
[Spokesbug] And he lands!
- [crowd applauding]
- Oh! So fancy.
[Jake] Mmm
And we're off
to the dance portion!
Their movements are pristine,
matching each other
step for step!!
And hand and hand and hand.
- [snickering]
- Oh, dear!
Finn is under
the gentlest pressure!
And hand!
You dance pretty good, buddy.
Objection! I dance Well!!
[Spokesbug] The swords clash!
[crowd cheering]
That signals the finale.
- The sword swinging,
- [swooshing]
cup slinging,
gentle decanting
Breakneck race to the finish!
Finn takes the lead!
Jake steals it back!
But Finn isn't giving up
[crowd gasps]
It's too close to call!
- [Elody gasps]
- M'lord.
Gasp! A flawless finish!
It all comes down to this
[gasps]
M'lord.
A perfect flourish!
Finn wins!
And it is Bellamy whom shall
wed the Lady Penelope!
Cram, yeah!
[trumpet blows]
Ooh, Finn is disqualified for
being a crass boy potty-mouth.
Pardon?
Jake wins by default!
And it is Elody whomst
shall Penelope wed
After all that?
Indeed.
Your use of the peasantly
tongue has result--
[Finn spits]
[laughing] You see, Bellamy?
Your crass boy [groans]
Jake, save your master!
Hmm?
Nah. [farts]
And now, Jake is disqualified.
There will be no winner.
Oh [chuckles]
- I guess I'm cool with that.
- Yeah!
Oh! Where have all
the good bugs gone?
Lady P, you don't need some
stuffy contest to find love.
You got all the bug you need,
right here.
Bellamy?
Loser number 1?
[scoffs] Nonsense.
Listen to me, girl.
In a world of losers,
you gotta go with your heart!
And Bellamy's dung-beetle
crazy about you!
Right, Bellamy?
B-b-but what about
the rules of decorum?!
C'mon, man!
Just tell her how you feel
in your little buggy heart!
[nervously] No! The rules!
I must remain! [groaning]
[roaring] Cram the rules!
He molted right
in front of everyone!
[crowd gasping]
[babybug] Cram!
Huzzah, Bellamy the buffoon
has done it
[screaming]
I love you, Penelope.
Oh!
[Lady Penelope] My!
Buh-buh-buh Bellamy
Fly away with me, baby!
Hmm Okay.
[wings flapping]
See you later, lovebugs!
Man, that's the best
I've ever felt about losing.
[chuckles] Yeah.
We did real good today.
[Elody] Wrong!
You don't understand
what you've done.
Oh.
These rules protected us
from absolute chaos!
We are doomed! You hear?
Doo--
- [both spitting]
- [wails dramatically]
Ahh! Ooh-ho! Ahh!
[Elody wailing] Why is
your spit so hard?
[closing theme song playing]
Come along with me ♪
And the butterflies
and bees ♪
We can wander
through the forest ♪
And do so as we please ♪
[robotic voice] Fred Films.