Astrid and Lilly Save the World (2022) s01e02 Episode Script
Teeth
1
Previously on Astrid &
Lilly Save The World
- But I love us.
- I love us too, Lils.
Out on a Sunday.
Rock and roll, ladies.
More like Pudge Patrol.
You're a monster.
Check out a mirror.
Oh, shit.
I'm going to die at the hands
of a hottie with a body.
I'm Brutus. Long story short,
a portal to another
dimension was opened.
End of the world type thing.
Astrid! Now!
Take this!
Ever since you got cool and I got fat,
we haven't exactly been buddies.
Let's do this.
Do my new superpowers
make my boobs look bigger?
I'm serious, look!
Yeah, they look really huge.
Ah, yes!
Ah, now that you brought it up,
do I seem more tall to you?
Uh, graceful, even?
Definitely.
Like a swan!
Thought so!
Is it possible that our whole,
"we're super-cool
monster hunters now" vibe
is actually gonna make us seem cooler
and give us a little respect?
I mean, even though we might totally die
trying to save humanity,
it's giving us an edge!
Is it possible this week
is finally the week I
wear my shorts to school?
Definitely!
Is it possible this is the week
I finally ask Sparrow on a date?
Maybe!
I cannot believe we
got "the" parking spot.
Maybe the world is finally
our oyster for a change?
Mm, yes, girl!
We're gonna get our groove on.
Ahh!
On second thought
- My office.
- Principal's office.
- But we didn't
- Now!
Mr. Varshidi, if I could just
No, you may not!
It's just that, technically,
I-I-it wasn't us.
Even though, I guess, technically,
it is because of us.
But, technically,
I think if you knew the bigger picture,
then you would be rewarding us
Instead of punishing us and
What is, like,
technically wrong with you?
Can we just get on with this?
I don't even know
how you got that thing to explode on us.
Was it some kind of magic trick?
Magic is social suicide.
Don't you two even wanna try to fit in?
We're not magicians!
And, like Lilly was saying,
it wasn't technically us.
I expect this kind of
behaviour from Astrid.
But Lilly, really?
Anyway,
Michelle and I have discussed it
and we think a suitable punishment
is the setting up and tearing down
the annual Extracurriculars Fair today.
You gotta be kidding me.
The fair? Seems fair to me!
Enjoy!
Good day, sir, ma'am.
And that is, uh, was,
a beautiful blouse dress!
Sir also ma'am.
This isn't how I pictured day one of
"awesome monster
hunters return to school"
starting off.
Yeah. Ain't high school grand?
Oh.
Looks like our pal, Brutus,
was kind enough to stop by.
I had a feeling we'd be hearing from him
since the sky rained monster guts
or whatever that was,
on Varshidi and Señorita Snot Ball.
What's it say?
Mm
"Dear Monster Hunters."
Mm, I do still love the sound of that.
"Solar flares indicate that a new entity
- has breached the realm."
- You think!?
"Species currently unclear.
Meet me at my pad to debrief.
Here's the address."
Yikes, species currently
unclear? That's kind of scary.
If you two are done passing notes,
I think you have a fair to set up.
Uh, yes, ma'am.
I hate this place.
Oh, great!
Guess I gotta move
all the tables by myself.
Uh, we can move tables, too.
Sure you can!
Maybe in opposite land.
Is Andy one of the monsters 'cause
can we vanquish him?
Oh.
Welcome to the annual
Extracurriculars Fair!
Remember,
everyone has to sign
up for at least one activity.
As your principal,
let me say
spread your wings.
Don't be afraid to try something new!
Remember: fear in Japanese
is only another word for opportunity!
Ah, yes, Eggs?
Is there a limit to the number of hours
we can spend in our club?
Uh, no, but
try to be reasonable!
Okay,
go shine, kids!
Get outta my way, theater shrimp.
Hey, watch the hair, buddy!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
This is perfect!
This is exactly the
method training I need
to nail my Willy Loman monologue.
- You're such a professional.
- I know.
Hi. I'm Sal.
I'm Val.
Welcome, welcome!
Look at all these smart faces!
Hey, Dad!
Shouldn't you be signing
up over there, son?
You need to bulk up like
the rest of your soccer friends.
Yeah, I just thought it'd be
cool if we could hang, though?
You need to be focused on the game.
- Dad, I
- No distractions.
Get your ass over there!
Wow, Tate's Dad is a real chode.
Yeah, not super
surprising, unfortunately.
What should I sign up for?
Furniture Internship:
more like free labor.
Yearbook feels like my natural choice
but I'm kinda freaked.
You should defs do yearbook!
You're an amazeballs photographer.
I've never seen better crime scenes.
I just don't want to sign up alone.
I'll be totally fine.
You can join me
in the Stalking Sparrow Seduction Club,
aka Dance Committee.
Yeah, I'm not super-psyched
to spend any more time
with Michelle right now.
Look, you can totally do this.
You're talented, and Jonas is, like,
the opposite of Michelle.
And
I'll be there in spirit.
Oh, my God, go away.
Mom, what are you doing here?
Helping Christine hand out bracelets.
More importantly,
Mr. Varshidi called me.
Oh?
That's all you have to say?
You got in trouble again?
- It was a misunderstanding.
- I'm sure it was.
I'm starting to think
that friend of yours
is a bad influence.
Lilly? She's practically a saint.
You think this is funny?
No, I just, I
I didn't do anything
wrong and Lilly, she
I think it's time you signed up
for Christine's youth group.
Mom, you know I'm not into that stuff.
Helen, I'm going to pop out to the car
to get some more bracelets.
Do you mind stepping in?
What would Christ-ine do?
Be right there.
Actions have consequences, young lady.
Um
I
What?
Okay.
Lilly!
Oh, sorry, are you all full?
No, no, not at all!
Happy to have you, and
your eye, on the team.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Thanks, Jonas.
Oh, uh, hi, Candace.
Pleasure as always.
Hi!
I thought I'd find you in here.
I did it! I signed up!
And Jonas was so nice,
like you wisely said.
Candace was a biznatch;
standard stuff.
That's great!
What's wrong?
Ugh,
my mom tore me a new one
and threatened me with
joining Christine's
youth groupies again.
And Sparrow saw the whole thing.
And then I tried to talk to him
but then I ran away like a total weirdo.
Rome wasn't built in a day.
Yeah.
Rome also totally crashed and burned.
I am so sorry to hear
about your daughter.
We are always on the
hunt for new recruits.
Door's always open!
I appreciate that.
Maybe it would do Astrid some good.
Yeah, like I can talk.
My Candace signed up for yearbook
with that Jonas character
after I specifically told her not to.
- Teenagers.
- Ugh!
Jonas, he's the one
we need to take care of.
Pardon?
What?
Nothing.
I can't believe Andy bailed!
Yeah, but
he was right.
These tables are heavy AF.
We could have used his muscle.
Muscle-shmuscle.
We did just fine without
his bonehead muscle.
But, like, not cool, bro.
Andy, if you're screwing with us,
I'm going to kill you!
My leg is vibrating.
Ah! Is your nose detector going off?
Oh!
Run!
Wait
It stopped.
Yeah, yeah, me too.
Well, I guess we know
why Andy didn't show.
Is that Andy's clothes?
And a skinbag?
What am I actually looking at here?
I think I'm gonna be sick.
I mean, I hated that guy
but I didn't want him to actually die.
Remind me again how
being monster hunters
is supposed to make
our lives better this year?
Are those pubes?
So
how do you like the place?
Ah, it's, um, uh
- My nightmare?
- Quirky?
Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
Tonight, I begin my Earth immersion
into everything
pop culture.
This place is about
to get so much cooler.
So, tell me again
exactly what happened with Sparrow?
I wanna talk about my goth hottie
as much as the next guy,
but you haven't answered
any of our questions
about skinbags, or
Who the monsters are;
if we're in imminent danger;
if we should be trusting
you with our lives?
- If those were pubes, like
- Shh!
That can wait.
True love is the most
important thing in
any dimension.
So,
what you need to do, is ask him out.
Nothing crazy.
Just see if he wants
to leap a few craters,
skin a Zordnuck.
Basic first date stuff.
Right! Humans.
I'm assuming that human boys
lack confidence just as
much as monster girls,
so
grab the Brutus by the horns, huh?
Why are you so into this stuff?
Because love is a battlefield.
Now, let's get to work.
Yep, those are skinbags.
Can we please stop saying skinbags?
- No.
- No.
Okay, then.
So, the monster's name is Razor?
That doesn't sound safe.
It's not. It refers to its 23,371 teeth,
which, coincidentally,
is the monster part
you need to retrieve for the orb.
So here's the deal with Razor:
it appears in human disguise
and always as a woman.
But definitely be on the lookout
for women you do not recognize
and trust no one.
Great, I trust everyone!
Razor only feeds off testosterone.
She needs it to live.
And she likes it young.
And Razor is also
virtually impossible to track
because your detector powers
only work when she takes off
the disguise to kill,
which means by the time
you get there, it's too late.
Oh, Andy!
We both had a quick jolt of our sensors
and then they went away.
So, how do we find her?
Well, that's where your
patrol skills come in.
Oh!
And you'll need this.
Ooh! What is it?
Is it a flame thrower?
A cool invisible dagger?
Ooh, it's
It's an oboe?
Oh, wow! So you actually hate us.
I am not joining band!
It's an oboe?
It's a Borgati 2000.
And it's lethal AF.
What, are we going to
play Razor to death?
Well, kinda.
I mean, you just need to put it
all together and figure it out.
Oh, and don't forget to soak the reed.
Oh, gross.
All right, ladies, this
is where I boogie.
What a confusing fella he is.
Ooh, yeah.
Mostly dudes.
A couple of chicks.
No new, strange lurking women.
What are you spying on, perv?
Uh, nothing; no one.
I am just learning
how to use my camera.
Okay, kids!
Welcome officially to Yearbook Club.
Now that you've all got your cameras,
I want you to ask yourselves one thing:
is life art,
or is art life?
More like fart life.
Lilly!
What? No! I-I didn't say
Okay, jokesters, enough of that.
I'll put you in pairs of two
for portrait practice.
Remember two things:
Take risks,
find your artistic voices.
That goes for Yearbook Club
and for life. And B:
this is fun!
As Lilly helped point out.
Well, it wasn't me.
Okay, you two, you two, you two
and you two.
- Thanks for that.
- Any time.
You can, uh, go first,
I don't like my picture taken.
Um, what are you doing?
Hello? Posing.
For who?
That's not the real you.
So, what do you think is the real me?
Someone much bitchier, for starters.
Yeah, Dad, I'll meet the
scout for drills after school.
Yes, sir.
Did you hear what the homework was?
I honestly clocked out at that point.
I don't know, maybe it was
Lord of the Flies or something.
Well, I think you look really smart
studying the crown molding.
Shut up!
I think I saw a giant
animal in my yard last night.
Me, too.
Did you? Oh, look, over there.
Yo! She just gave
me the weirdest look.
You think she could be Razor?
It's probably not someone we've known
since the third grade.
Yeah, good point.
So stoked to be
starting my internship today.
Sally's gonna teach me
everything I need to know
about being a saleswoman.
Suck it, Joanne and Todd.
Going method is the most
important decision you've made.
I know.
new toy. Yeah.
God, Derek's as big a dick as ever.
Remember when he pantsed me in gym?
He's the worst.
You okay, Eggs?
On the binary scale.
I need some peeps
to deal with the heavy furniture.
You know, while I do my important
character study work.
Of course.
I'd offer to help, but
I don't want to damage my instrument.
Oh, yeah, No, that's okay,
What about those guys?
Oh, yeah. Perfection. Here we go.
- Hey, guys. Hey! Hi.
- Hello.
Hi, hi, hi.
Do you want to help me
move some furniture?
Uhh
Okay, well, there's money in it
for your protein powder, whatever.
If that's the case,
if you're looking for
the strongest one of us,
then that would be me.
Yeah, now that Andy's animal bait.
- Rest in peace, bro.
- Oh, RIP.
Right, RIP. Um
my people will be in contact
with your people, okay?
Cool? Awesome. Bye.
All right.
Yo, have you seen Cooper?
Last I seen him was
at your Mom's house.
No, really, he didn't show up
for lifting this morning.
Weird.
He never misses lifting.
Now, most people would tell you
to karate chop your
pillows on the top, like so.
Great.
Amateur hour.
The correct thing to do
is to chop on the side.
Hm? Yeah! Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
Here.
- Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Good.
- Yeah. Okay.
This is method acting heaven.
I'm gonna nail this monologue.
That means no more
getting cast as the understudy.
Oh, anything I can do to help.
I know only too well
what it's like to be overlooked
for being tiny all your life.
We are going to make sure
that doesn't happen to you.
You are literally the best, Sally.
Oh, ho, ho.
Sorry, do you think
I could borrow some of these
just to practice my
stage blocking and?
Thank you.
Mm-hm.
I'm at a loss.
I guess I don't even know
what we're looking for.
Maybe someone like that?
Razelle.
Don't you mean Razor?
What are you doing, hottie monster?
Let's tail her.
Come on. Ah
Why can't I do this?
Ah, uh
Hello?
Yo, Cooper, is that you?
Huh, whatever.
Derek, get away!
She's gonna drain you!
Astrid, suck the reed!
Suck harder!
What are you doing?
Mom?
Mom?
Oh, shit.
What in God's name is going on?
Look, I'm not even gonna ask.
Just be grateful I
convinced her not to sue.
Hand over the oboe.
Not sure why you would steal
an instrument from orchestra
or why you would attempt
to include such an odd item
into your little magic tricks.
We're not magicians!
We didn't steal anything
And you skipped last period.
Look, I don't know
what's going on with you two,
but you're gonna think
about your actions tomorrow
when you're on trash duty.
And the snake was expelled
from Paradise and peace was restored.
Who are you talking to?
Hm? No one.
How was school?
I didn't know you were coming by.
Yeah, I just forgot my, uh,
yearbook camera in the rec room.
I'll see you at home.
Yearbook?
Tell me,
where are we on our
little Jonas problem?
It won't be much longer.
Thank you, my sweet angel.
I am here to serve,
just as you are here
to serve me.
Are you okay?
Oh, yeah, sure, it's
just a little warm in here.
Oh, good, it's Derek; he's
gonna help rotate the shelves.
Yo.
Ah.
Uh, Val,
could you run and get me a coffee?
I I just need some caffeine.
Sure. Yeah. Oh
Sales call lessons when I get back!
Derek, is it?
Yeah.
You're very strong.
I guess, yeah.
Would you help me move this?
Sure.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
How do I know if I'm any good at this?
Don't know.
How did Rosalind Franklin know
DNA can exist in two forms?
You and your big, tall muscles
just had to come and
help little old me.
If, uh,
you could just move, I could, uh
You're so
big and powerful.
Oh
Did you just sniff me?
Oh, because everyone wants
to sniff your big muscles?
What? I, uh
What?
You're looking at me like I'm weak
and insignificant.
Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho
Mmm
Mm.
Oh!
What is that?
Looks rank.
I think it might be a dead animal.
Hey, Lils?
Mm-hm?
Do you smell vinegar?
No.
Shit.
Bet you're not feeling
very powerful now, are you?
Is that a senior class ring?
Ah! Oh, shit, I think
it's happening again,
like right now.
Holy shit.
Is that a varsity soccer patch?
How do we stop it?
Cooper?
Ohh.
Ahhh
- Sally
- Mm-hm?
Ah, I feel so much better.
Derek was very helpful.
If you have any other big friends,
I'd love to eat meet
them.
Yeah. Okay.
Eggs, you sure you're cool to lock up?
Oh, yeah, sure.
Wow
what is that?
String pattern?
Hey, Frick!
Oh! Whoa, whoa! Who died?
Oh, bad joke?
I'm sorry. Too soon?
Hey, this blows!
If we're never gonna
get to Razor in time
to stop her from killing,
then why are we here?
How are we supposed to save the world?
Yeah, I thought being monster-hunters
was supposed to make us
feel better, not worse!
But, turns out, I'm not
good at being a teenager.
I'm not good at hunting monsters.
I'm not good at anything!
Oh, my God, we really are losers!
Guys, guys, guys!
You've, like, only just
started doing this, okay?
What, you thought you were gonna go
from high school girl to master
monster slayer overnight?
Come on! No!
And, besides, Razor is a toughie.
Now, there's a reason
you were chosen to do this.
Mostly because you were the
ones who opened the portal,
but, also, because
you have something
that no one else does.
We do?
Yes.
Ahh
You
have the unique perspective
of unfairly being labeled as losers
so you got really good
at looking at people
from the outside.
So, consider yourselves lucky.
It's gonna help you now.
I mean, I guess we are pretty good
at spying on people.
And our detective skills
really are supes deece.
I mean, they don't call us
Pudge Patrol for nothing.
- Mm-mm.
- What the?
Now,
repeat after me:
I
am strong and capable.
Hm, Brutus, I
Just say it!
I am strong and capable.
I am smart.
I am smart.
And I'm gonna go full Pudge Patrol
on these monster mofos.
And I am gonna go full Pudge Patrol
on these monster mofos.
Notebooks?
Mmm. Check.
Camera?
Check.
Super secret CIA-grade
recording device leg holsters?
Check.
Feel like you guys
are up to something.
No, we're not.
Well, what's that
wrapped around your legs?
Tampons.
Trash duty,
AKA Spesh Ops Clue
Hunt commencing
Now!
Gross.
What is she looking at?
Okay, Cooper, give us a clue!
Uh, nothing conclusive
other than the explanation
behind his rock-hard thighs.
Rock hard what?
Uh, oh Rock-hard
size.
Mograph
For science class.
Uh-huh.
Huh.
Okay.
Okay, come on. Just try not to
Yo, where's Derek?
He better not miss the game later.
Oh, right! The game!
Oh, yeah!
Well,
no skinbags here.
- No what?
- Uh, nothing.
Hey, when did you see Derek last?
Dunno. Yesterday at school?
Ouch! Oh!
Goddammit, it's happening again!
Oh!
You chicks are weirder than I thought.
I guess these attacks
aren't only happening
in the weight room.
So, then, how the hell
do we figure out
where they are happening?
Nothing's here in the props storage.
Okay, this is getting
kind of embarrassing.
Do you see this?
Skinbag remnant.
Holy shit!
Is Razor the props lady?
Prop lady's been here forever.
Right.
What are we missing?
Oh, I don't think this one is fresh.
Maybe there's a clue
in the skinbag pubes
Whatever they were
I have an idea.
This is unit one-one-three
following up
on the animal attacks APB.
Were there any consistent pubi
I mean fibers found at the scenes?
What in the hell kinda
animal are we talkin' here?
Roger, one-one-three.
The responding units
found multiple reddish hairs.
Chief thinks we're looking for
some sort of roided- out fox.
Over.
Reddish hairs? Nice work, officer.
Now, one more thing.
Psst, Tate! Tate!
- Psst!
- Psst!
Hotbuns!
Jesus.
What are you guys doing?
I really don't think it's a good idea
for us to be seen
together after last week.
Guess what? Neither do we, cool guy.
But we need your help.
In exchange for keeping
your little kidnapping secret.
Look,
"guy who disappeared
because he went rock climbing,"
as you can guess,
there isn't a wild animal
eating your friends.
And unless you want
your muscley bros to disappear
one by one, you'll help us out.
I'm super freaked out right now.
I just passed three crying freshmen
heading into the bathroom.
Soccer star and sensitive protector?
Ha-ha.
You remind me of a younger me.
Sometimes it's best just to let freshmen
work out their traumas on their own.
Ah, one of them
mentioned listening to Enya.
Shepherd Moons? Or A Day Without Rain?
Uh, the second one?
I'm on my way.
Can't believe that worked.
All right, here's your weird oboe.
Can I get back to soccer practice now?
Thank you. This was super helpful.
- All right.
- Hey, Tate?
Um, speaking of soccer
I heard what your dad said
and I just wanted to say
that sucks.
My mom doesn't get me, either.
Okay, yeah, whatever. Later, dorks.
We'll get through to him some day.
Or not.
Okay, walking us through one more time.
Mm-hm.
We know the mons-perp has red hair.
- Yeah.
- That's huge.
And we know that the
testosterone-iest guys
in school are gonna be
at the soccer game today.
Well, that's where I'd
be if I wanted dinner.
Amongst other things.
Exactly.
Okay, one: we have to scope the crowd.
- Yes.
- Two: find the hair.
Three
Oboe this mofo!
Nice.
Uh, hi, Mom! I'm gonna be home late,
just, uh, finishing studying.
I got another call from Mr. Varshidi.
Again, Astrid!?
It was another misunderstanding.
Astrid Esther,
stop lying.
What has gotten into you lately!?
You come home right now!
You're grounded.
Still no redheads.
Minus Christine, but she doesn't count.
But, man, she seems pretty pissed
that Candace is taking
yearbook pics for Jonas.
I just hate doing this stuff alone.
I feel so exposed.
You're not alone.
And you've been doing awesome.
Thank God.
Bad news: I think
we're at a dead end.
Good news: it mean I can
get the hell outa here.
Who are you talking to?
Your girlfriend?
She's not my
What are you even doing up here?
Aren't you supposed to be
taking pics for the winning team?
Shouldn't you be?
Um
Had to get away from my mom.
You know, good ol' Christ
ine.
Yeah, she's been pretty intense lately.
What's her deal?
I don't know.
I know she wants to ruin my life.
Crap, I forgot to give Jonas
back his camera.
Um,
I'll be right back.
Oh, um, okay.
Ew!
Was that Candace?
Yeah, just yearbook stuff.
Okay, uh, one last look.
What the?
Okay.
I might be nuts,
but I could have sworn
I just saw furniture lady's
teeth glowing.
Okay, I got the closeups.
If you got wides, I think we're good.
Got a cool one of stupid Tate, but
I don't wanna use it.
Trouble in paradise?
Just annoyed. You know,
we were supposed to hang
after the game, but
he just cancelled on me
for the lamest reason.
That sucks.
Yeah, he told Valerie
he'd help here move
her crap for her internship.
Lame, right?
Oh, my God!
The pillow in drama class!
Uh-uh
The skinbag.
Tate's been powerlifting.
Oh, it makes sense! It's furniture lady!
She's brunette, but
Duh!
They weren't hair
fibers, they're fur fibers!
Crap!
She's gone.
I'll meet you at HQ.
What are you talking about?
Um, do me a favour? Get Tate to cancel.
- Why?
- Just do it.
I'll explain later.
Fine.
Jeez, you're a lot
bossier than I remember!
Okay.
Let's go, Candace!
Sally!
Sally, my friend
flaked at the last minute
so it's just me tonight.
Oh, that's a shame.
I
really wanted you
to nail that monologue
and
feel what it's like to
not be overlooked.
Sally, you don't look
so good. Are you
No.
But
Unfortunately
you do.
What?
Astrid, quick! The Borgati.
Oh, my God!
Ahh
Thank God we got here in time!
- Hi, girls.
- Astrid, don't stop playing!
Wait!
Are you sure that's what you want?
Oh, we are sure.
Look,
I know you've got a job to do.
I know you want the world
to be a kinder place, but
Think about it.
Those boys
Those cruel, muscle-ridden boys
Do they really make
the world a kinder place?
That's not the point.
Isn't it?
Wouldn't we be better off
without bullies like that?
Yeah, but
That's not wh
You have the power to make that happen.
This is your chance.
I mean, who have you been
taking orders from, anyway?
Brutus?
I mean, what do you
really know about him?
Oh, look
Ah
I didn't want to
hurt Val.
I adore Val.
She's just like us.
Overlooked for superficial reasons.
But if you work with me,
we can get rid of the bullies,
manipulators,
cruel tormentors.
Aren't you sick of
everybody always telling you
what you need to change about yourself?
Underestimating you?
What do you want?
Hm.
Excuse us a second.
No sudden moves!
Does she have a point?
I mean, what she said about Brutus
What do we actually know about him?
We've been blindly trusting
him and he's a monster.
He's been helping us, right?
- Yeah.
- With all this stuff.
And with Sparrow.
But, I mean
I guess we don't know him-know him?
Yeah, and we definitely don't know her.
I thought the whole point
was to get rid of the bullies?
Totally.
But then doesn't that make us the bully?
Do we want to be them?
Or do we want to be us?
- Oh, shit!
- Oi!
Oh!
Ow! My ears!
Don't stop playing!
Oh.
Note to self:
don't get sweet-talked by monsters.
They're still monsters.
Two down,
eight to go!
Oh
Okay.
Yeah. Ugh..
Yeah, hoh
Okay.
One set of slimy ew
razor teeth for the orb.
Can I just toot our own horns
here for a second
and say we pieced this all together
using our own homegrown,
frickin' detective skills.
Maybe we really can save the world!
- Okay.
- Whoo.
- Oh, yeah.
- You're good?
Oh, thanks. Okay.
- Whoo!
- Okay, let's go.
I am freaking strong, smart and capable.
A-fricking-men.
Guess what I'm wearing
to school tomorrow?
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
Oooh!
Oh, crap! Val.
Oh.
Cute shorts. We should
take your portrait today.
Oh, um, yeah, sure.
We can do that. Thanks.
That was weird.
But she's right: you look adorbs!
Mmm!
You got this.
God, you're hot.
That's not what I meant.
You know what? That
actually totally is what I meant.
Also, I think you're really interesting.
And I like you.
Whoo
Do you maybe wanna go out with me?
Like on a date?
For when I'm done being grounded
for a million years?
So, this is why
you've been acting so weird with me?
Well, I hate dates.
But, yeah.
Yeah, I'll see ya around.
Nice going.
I'm sweating! I'm sweating!
- Did you see that?
- Yeah.
- You saw the whole thing?
- Yes.
- He said
- I know.
It was amazing 'cuz I was, like,
"Oh, do you want to
go on a date with me"
and he was, like,
"Nah". Then he said yes!
Oh, my God.
Oh!
Awesome work, monster hunters!
One step closer.
P.S. Stay tuned.
And wary.
Great.
So, I think we need to have
a little chat with Brutus
about what Razor said about him.
You have to do an internship like I did.
Sally thanked me on my last day
by giving me a surprise facial.
It was so relaxing, I
literally passed out.
Look at my skin. Look at it!
I can't with that rosy glow!
Wow, Val has quite the
coping mechanism for trauma.
Do you wanna come with me
to bring this film to Jonas?
Sure.
God, you know, I think
I really am good at this.
Mm.
Oh! Uh, hey, Frick.
Where's Jonas? I gotta drop this off.
I guess Jonas didn't show today,
so Varshidi asked me
to sub in for him.
Oh, okay, weird. Um, thanks.
You don't think that
I know you're up to something.
I just don't know
what it is yet,
but I think it has something
to do with the solar system.
For the millionth time,
we're not up to anything.
And definitely not anything
to do with the sky.
Well, I have some information.
Just thought you should know
I saw an unidentified cosmic string
above coordinates 41.3684 degrees north,
82.1079 degrees
west.
You know, we're
definitely not interested
in that information.
What were the coordinates again?
It's working.
Previously on Astrid &
Lilly Save The World
- But I love us.
- I love us too, Lils.
Out on a Sunday.
Rock and roll, ladies.
More like Pudge Patrol.
You're a monster.
Check out a mirror.
Oh, shit.
I'm going to die at the hands
of a hottie with a body.
I'm Brutus. Long story short,
a portal to another
dimension was opened.
End of the world type thing.
Astrid! Now!
Take this!
Ever since you got cool and I got fat,
we haven't exactly been buddies.
Let's do this.
Do my new superpowers
make my boobs look bigger?
I'm serious, look!
Yeah, they look really huge.
Ah, yes!
Ah, now that you brought it up,
do I seem more tall to you?
Uh, graceful, even?
Definitely.
Like a swan!
Thought so!
Is it possible that our whole,
"we're super-cool
monster hunters now" vibe
is actually gonna make us seem cooler
and give us a little respect?
I mean, even though we might totally die
trying to save humanity,
it's giving us an edge!
Is it possible this week
is finally the week I
wear my shorts to school?
Definitely!
Is it possible this is the week
I finally ask Sparrow on a date?
Maybe!
I cannot believe we
got "the" parking spot.
Maybe the world is finally
our oyster for a change?
Mm, yes, girl!
We're gonna get our groove on.
Ahh!
On second thought
- My office.
- Principal's office.
- But we didn't
- Now!
Mr. Varshidi, if I could just
No, you may not!
It's just that, technically,
I-I-it wasn't us.
Even though, I guess, technically,
it is because of us.
But, technically,
I think if you knew the bigger picture,
then you would be rewarding us
Instead of punishing us and
What is, like,
technically wrong with you?
Can we just get on with this?
I don't even know
how you got that thing to explode on us.
Was it some kind of magic trick?
Magic is social suicide.
Don't you two even wanna try to fit in?
We're not magicians!
And, like Lilly was saying,
it wasn't technically us.
I expect this kind of
behaviour from Astrid.
But Lilly, really?
Anyway,
Michelle and I have discussed it
and we think a suitable punishment
is the setting up and tearing down
the annual Extracurriculars Fair today.
You gotta be kidding me.
The fair? Seems fair to me!
Enjoy!
Good day, sir, ma'am.
And that is, uh, was,
a beautiful blouse dress!
Sir also ma'am.
This isn't how I pictured day one of
"awesome monster
hunters return to school"
starting off.
Yeah. Ain't high school grand?
Oh.
Looks like our pal, Brutus,
was kind enough to stop by.
I had a feeling we'd be hearing from him
since the sky rained monster guts
or whatever that was,
on Varshidi and Señorita Snot Ball.
What's it say?
Mm
"Dear Monster Hunters."
Mm, I do still love the sound of that.
"Solar flares indicate that a new entity
- has breached the realm."
- You think!?
"Species currently unclear.
Meet me at my pad to debrief.
Here's the address."
Yikes, species currently
unclear? That's kind of scary.
If you two are done passing notes,
I think you have a fair to set up.
Uh, yes, ma'am.
I hate this place.
Oh, great!
Guess I gotta move
all the tables by myself.
Uh, we can move tables, too.
Sure you can!
Maybe in opposite land.
Is Andy one of the monsters 'cause
can we vanquish him?
Oh.
Welcome to the annual
Extracurriculars Fair!
Remember,
everyone has to sign
up for at least one activity.
As your principal,
let me say
spread your wings.
Don't be afraid to try something new!
Remember: fear in Japanese
is only another word for opportunity!
Ah, yes, Eggs?
Is there a limit to the number of hours
we can spend in our club?
Uh, no, but
try to be reasonable!
Okay,
go shine, kids!
Get outta my way, theater shrimp.
Hey, watch the hair, buddy!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
This is perfect!
This is exactly the
method training I need
to nail my Willy Loman monologue.
- You're such a professional.
- I know.
Hi. I'm Sal.
I'm Val.
Welcome, welcome!
Look at all these smart faces!
Hey, Dad!
Shouldn't you be signing
up over there, son?
You need to bulk up like
the rest of your soccer friends.
Yeah, I just thought it'd be
cool if we could hang, though?
You need to be focused on the game.
- Dad, I
- No distractions.
Get your ass over there!
Wow, Tate's Dad is a real chode.
Yeah, not super
surprising, unfortunately.
What should I sign up for?
Furniture Internship:
more like free labor.
Yearbook feels like my natural choice
but I'm kinda freaked.
You should defs do yearbook!
You're an amazeballs photographer.
I've never seen better crime scenes.
I just don't want to sign up alone.
I'll be totally fine.
You can join me
in the Stalking Sparrow Seduction Club,
aka Dance Committee.
Yeah, I'm not super-psyched
to spend any more time
with Michelle right now.
Look, you can totally do this.
You're talented, and Jonas is, like,
the opposite of Michelle.
And
I'll be there in spirit.
Oh, my God, go away.
Mom, what are you doing here?
Helping Christine hand out bracelets.
More importantly,
Mr. Varshidi called me.
Oh?
That's all you have to say?
You got in trouble again?
- It was a misunderstanding.
- I'm sure it was.
I'm starting to think
that friend of yours
is a bad influence.
Lilly? She's practically a saint.
You think this is funny?
No, I just, I
I didn't do anything
wrong and Lilly, she
I think it's time you signed up
for Christine's youth group.
Mom, you know I'm not into that stuff.
Helen, I'm going to pop out to the car
to get some more bracelets.
Do you mind stepping in?
What would Christ-ine do?
Be right there.
Actions have consequences, young lady.
Um
I
What?
Okay.
Lilly!
Oh, sorry, are you all full?
No, no, not at all!
Happy to have you, and
your eye, on the team.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Thanks, Jonas.
Oh, uh, hi, Candace.
Pleasure as always.
Hi!
I thought I'd find you in here.
I did it! I signed up!
And Jonas was so nice,
like you wisely said.
Candace was a biznatch;
standard stuff.
That's great!
What's wrong?
Ugh,
my mom tore me a new one
and threatened me with
joining Christine's
youth groupies again.
And Sparrow saw the whole thing.
And then I tried to talk to him
but then I ran away like a total weirdo.
Rome wasn't built in a day.
Yeah.
Rome also totally crashed and burned.
I am so sorry to hear
about your daughter.
We are always on the
hunt for new recruits.
Door's always open!
I appreciate that.
Maybe it would do Astrid some good.
Yeah, like I can talk.
My Candace signed up for yearbook
with that Jonas character
after I specifically told her not to.
- Teenagers.
- Ugh!
Jonas, he's the one
we need to take care of.
Pardon?
What?
Nothing.
I can't believe Andy bailed!
Yeah, but
he was right.
These tables are heavy AF.
We could have used his muscle.
Muscle-shmuscle.
We did just fine without
his bonehead muscle.
But, like, not cool, bro.
Andy, if you're screwing with us,
I'm going to kill you!
My leg is vibrating.
Ah! Is your nose detector going off?
Oh!
Run!
Wait
It stopped.
Yeah, yeah, me too.
Well, I guess we know
why Andy didn't show.
Is that Andy's clothes?
And a skinbag?
What am I actually looking at here?
I think I'm gonna be sick.
I mean, I hated that guy
but I didn't want him to actually die.
Remind me again how
being monster hunters
is supposed to make
our lives better this year?
Are those pubes?
So
how do you like the place?
Ah, it's, um, uh
- My nightmare?
- Quirky?
Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
Tonight, I begin my Earth immersion
into everything
pop culture.
This place is about
to get so much cooler.
So, tell me again
exactly what happened with Sparrow?
I wanna talk about my goth hottie
as much as the next guy,
but you haven't answered
any of our questions
about skinbags, or
Who the monsters are;
if we're in imminent danger;
if we should be trusting
you with our lives?
- If those were pubes, like
- Shh!
That can wait.
True love is the most
important thing in
any dimension.
So,
what you need to do, is ask him out.
Nothing crazy.
Just see if he wants
to leap a few craters,
skin a Zordnuck.
Basic first date stuff.
Right! Humans.
I'm assuming that human boys
lack confidence just as
much as monster girls,
so
grab the Brutus by the horns, huh?
Why are you so into this stuff?
Because love is a battlefield.
Now, let's get to work.
Yep, those are skinbags.
Can we please stop saying skinbags?
- No.
- No.
Okay, then.
So, the monster's name is Razor?
That doesn't sound safe.
It's not. It refers to its 23,371 teeth,
which, coincidentally,
is the monster part
you need to retrieve for the orb.
So here's the deal with Razor:
it appears in human disguise
and always as a woman.
But definitely be on the lookout
for women you do not recognize
and trust no one.
Great, I trust everyone!
Razor only feeds off testosterone.
She needs it to live.
And she likes it young.
And Razor is also
virtually impossible to track
because your detector powers
only work when she takes off
the disguise to kill,
which means by the time
you get there, it's too late.
Oh, Andy!
We both had a quick jolt of our sensors
and then they went away.
So, how do we find her?
Well, that's where your
patrol skills come in.
Oh!
And you'll need this.
Ooh! What is it?
Is it a flame thrower?
A cool invisible dagger?
Ooh, it's
It's an oboe?
Oh, wow! So you actually hate us.
I am not joining band!
It's an oboe?
It's a Borgati 2000.
And it's lethal AF.
What, are we going to
play Razor to death?
Well, kinda.
I mean, you just need to put it
all together and figure it out.
Oh, and don't forget to soak the reed.
Oh, gross.
All right, ladies, this
is where I boogie.
What a confusing fella he is.
Ooh, yeah.
Mostly dudes.
A couple of chicks.
No new, strange lurking women.
What are you spying on, perv?
Uh, nothing; no one.
I am just learning
how to use my camera.
Okay, kids!
Welcome officially to Yearbook Club.
Now that you've all got your cameras,
I want you to ask yourselves one thing:
is life art,
or is art life?
More like fart life.
Lilly!
What? No! I-I didn't say
Okay, jokesters, enough of that.
I'll put you in pairs of two
for portrait practice.
Remember two things:
Take risks,
find your artistic voices.
That goes for Yearbook Club
and for life. And B:
this is fun!
As Lilly helped point out.
Well, it wasn't me.
Okay, you two, you two, you two
and you two.
- Thanks for that.
- Any time.
You can, uh, go first,
I don't like my picture taken.
Um, what are you doing?
Hello? Posing.
For who?
That's not the real you.
So, what do you think is the real me?
Someone much bitchier, for starters.
Yeah, Dad, I'll meet the
scout for drills after school.
Yes, sir.
Did you hear what the homework was?
I honestly clocked out at that point.
I don't know, maybe it was
Lord of the Flies or something.
Well, I think you look really smart
studying the crown molding.
Shut up!
I think I saw a giant
animal in my yard last night.
Me, too.
Did you? Oh, look, over there.
Yo! She just gave
me the weirdest look.
You think she could be Razor?
It's probably not someone we've known
since the third grade.
Yeah, good point.
So stoked to be
starting my internship today.
Sally's gonna teach me
everything I need to know
about being a saleswoman.
Suck it, Joanne and Todd.
Going method is the most
important decision you've made.
I know.
new toy. Yeah.
God, Derek's as big a dick as ever.
Remember when he pantsed me in gym?
He's the worst.
You okay, Eggs?
On the binary scale.
I need some peeps
to deal with the heavy furniture.
You know, while I do my important
character study work.
Of course.
I'd offer to help, but
I don't want to damage my instrument.
Oh, yeah, No, that's okay,
What about those guys?
Oh, yeah. Perfection. Here we go.
- Hey, guys. Hey! Hi.
- Hello.
Hi, hi, hi.
Do you want to help me
move some furniture?
Uhh
Okay, well, there's money in it
for your protein powder, whatever.
If that's the case,
if you're looking for
the strongest one of us,
then that would be me.
Yeah, now that Andy's animal bait.
- Rest in peace, bro.
- Oh, RIP.
Right, RIP. Um
my people will be in contact
with your people, okay?
Cool? Awesome. Bye.
All right.
Yo, have you seen Cooper?
Last I seen him was
at your Mom's house.
No, really, he didn't show up
for lifting this morning.
Weird.
He never misses lifting.
Now, most people would tell you
to karate chop your
pillows on the top, like so.
Great.
Amateur hour.
The correct thing to do
is to chop on the side.
Hm? Yeah! Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
Here.
- Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Good.
- Yeah. Okay.
This is method acting heaven.
I'm gonna nail this monologue.
That means no more
getting cast as the understudy.
Oh, anything I can do to help.
I know only too well
what it's like to be overlooked
for being tiny all your life.
We are going to make sure
that doesn't happen to you.
You are literally the best, Sally.
Oh, ho, ho.
Sorry, do you think
I could borrow some of these
just to practice my
stage blocking and?
Thank you.
Mm-hm.
I'm at a loss.
I guess I don't even know
what we're looking for.
Maybe someone like that?
Razelle.
Don't you mean Razor?
What are you doing, hottie monster?
Let's tail her.
Come on. Ah
Why can't I do this?
Ah, uh
Hello?
Yo, Cooper, is that you?
Huh, whatever.
Derek, get away!
She's gonna drain you!
Astrid, suck the reed!
Suck harder!
What are you doing?
Mom?
Mom?
Oh, shit.
What in God's name is going on?
Look, I'm not even gonna ask.
Just be grateful I
convinced her not to sue.
Hand over the oboe.
Not sure why you would steal
an instrument from orchestra
or why you would attempt
to include such an odd item
into your little magic tricks.
We're not magicians!
We didn't steal anything
And you skipped last period.
Look, I don't know
what's going on with you two,
but you're gonna think
about your actions tomorrow
when you're on trash duty.
And the snake was expelled
from Paradise and peace was restored.
Who are you talking to?
Hm? No one.
How was school?
I didn't know you were coming by.
Yeah, I just forgot my, uh,
yearbook camera in the rec room.
I'll see you at home.
Yearbook?
Tell me,
where are we on our
little Jonas problem?
It won't be much longer.
Thank you, my sweet angel.
I am here to serve,
just as you are here
to serve me.
Are you okay?
Oh, yeah, sure, it's
just a little warm in here.
Oh, good, it's Derek; he's
gonna help rotate the shelves.
Yo.
Ah.
Uh, Val,
could you run and get me a coffee?
I I just need some caffeine.
Sure. Yeah. Oh
Sales call lessons when I get back!
Derek, is it?
Yeah.
You're very strong.
I guess, yeah.
Would you help me move this?
Sure.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
How do I know if I'm any good at this?
Don't know.
How did Rosalind Franklin know
DNA can exist in two forms?
You and your big, tall muscles
just had to come and
help little old me.
If, uh,
you could just move, I could, uh
You're so
big and powerful.
Oh
Did you just sniff me?
Oh, because everyone wants
to sniff your big muscles?
What? I, uh
What?
You're looking at me like I'm weak
and insignificant.
Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho
Mmm
Mm.
Oh!
What is that?
Looks rank.
I think it might be a dead animal.
Hey, Lils?
Mm-hm?
Do you smell vinegar?
No.
Shit.
Bet you're not feeling
very powerful now, are you?
Is that a senior class ring?
Ah! Oh, shit, I think
it's happening again,
like right now.
Holy shit.
Is that a varsity soccer patch?
How do we stop it?
Cooper?
Ohh.
Ahhh
- Sally
- Mm-hm?
Ah, I feel so much better.
Derek was very helpful.
If you have any other big friends,
I'd love to eat meet
them.
Yeah. Okay.
Eggs, you sure you're cool to lock up?
Oh, yeah, sure.
Wow
what is that?
String pattern?
Hey, Frick!
Oh! Whoa, whoa! Who died?
Oh, bad joke?
I'm sorry. Too soon?
Hey, this blows!
If we're never gonna
get to Razor in time
to stop her from killing,
then why are we here?
How are we supposed to save the world?
Yeah, I thought being monster-hunters
was supposed to make us
feel better, not worse!
But, turns out, I'm not
good at being a teenager.
I'm not good at hunting monsters.
I'm not good at anything!
Oh, my God, we really are losers!
Guys, guys, guys!
You've, like, only just
started doing this, okay?
What, you thought you were gonna go
from high school girl to master
monster slayer overnight?
Come on! No!
And, besides, Razor is a toughie.
Now, there's a reason
you were chosen to do this.
Mostly because you were the
ones who opened the portal,
but, also, because
you have something
that no one else does.
We do?
Yes.
Ahh
You
have the unique perspective
of unfairly being labeled as losers
so you got really good
at looking at people
from the outside.
So, consider yourselves lucky.
It's gonna help you now.
I mean, I guess we are pretty good
at spying on people.
And our detective skills
really are supes deece.
I mean, they don't call us
Pudge Patrol for nothing.
- Mm-mm.
- What the?
Now,
repeat after me:
I
am strong and capable.
Hm, Brutus, I
Just say it!
I am strong and capable.
I am smart.
I am smart.
And I'm gonna go full Pudge Patrol
on these monster mofos.
And I am gonna go full Pudge Patrol
on these monster mofos.
Notebooks?
Mmm. Check.
Camera?
Check.
Super secret CIA-grade
recording device leg holsters?
Check.
Feel like you guys
are up to something.
No, we're not.
Well, what's that
wrapped around your legs?
Tampons.
Trash duty,
AKA Spesh Ops Clue
Hunt commencing
Now!
Gross.
What is she looking at?
Okay, Cooper, give us a clue!
Uh, nothing conclusive
other than the explanation
behind his rock-hard thighs.
Rock hard what?
Uh, oh Rock-hard
size.
Mograph
For science class.
Uh-huh.
Huh.
Okay.
Okay, come on. Just try not to
Yo, where's Derek?
He better not miss the game later.
Oh, right! The game!
Oh, yeah!
Well,
no skinbags here.
- No what?
- Uh, nothing.
Hey, when did you see Derek last?
Dunno. Yesterday at school?
Ouch! Oh!
Goddammit, it's happening again!
Oh!
You chicks are weirder than I thought.
I guess these attacks
aren't only happening
in the weight room.
So, then, how the hell
do we figure out
where they are happening?
Nothing's here in the props storage.
Okay, this is getting
kind of embarrassing.
Do you see this?
Skinbag remnant.
Holy shit!
Is Razor the props lady?
Prop lady's been here forever.
Right.
What are we missing?
Oh, I don't think this one is fresh.
Maybe there's a clue
in the skinbag pubes
Whatever they were
I have an idea.
This is unit one-one-three
following up
on the animal attacks APB.
Were there any consistent pubi
I mean fibers found at the scenes?
What in the hell kinda
animal are we talkin' here?
Roger, one-one-three.
The responding units
found multiple reddish hairs.
Chief thinks we're looking for
some sort of roided- out fox.
Over.
Reddish hairs? Nice work, officer.
Now, one more thing.
Psst, Tate! Tate!
- Psst!
- Psst!
Hotbuns!
Jesus.
What are you guys doing?
I really don't think it's a good idea
for us to be seen
together after last week.
Guess what? Neither do we, cool guy.
But we need your help.
In exchange for keeping
your little kidnapping secret.
Look,
"guy who disappeared
because he went rock climbing,"
as you can guess,
there isn't a wild animal
eating your friends.
And unless you want
your muscley bros to disappear
one by one, you'll help us out.
I'm super freaked out right now.
I just passed three crying freshmen
heading into the bathroom.
Soccer star and sensitive protector?
Ha-ha.
You remind me of a younger me.
Sometimes it's best just to let freshmen
work out their traumas on their own.
Ah, one of them
mentioned listening to Enya.
Shepherd Moons? Or A Day Without Rain?
Uh, the second one?
I'm on my way.
Can't believe that worked.
All right, here's your weird oboe.
Can I get back to soccer practice now?
Thank you. This was super helpful.
- All right.
- Hey, Tate?
Um, speaking of soccer
I heard what your dad said
and I just wanted to say
that sucks.
My mom doesn't get me, either.
Okay, yeah, whatever. Later, dorks.
We'll get through to him some day.
Or not.
Okay, walking us through one more time.
Mm-hm.
We know the mons-perp has red hair.
- Yeah.
- That's huge.
And we know that the
testosterone-iest guys
in school are gonna be
at the soccer game today.
Well, that's where I'd
be if I wanted dinner.
Amongst other things.
Exactly.
Okay, one: we have to scope the crowd.
- Yes.
- Two: find the hair.
Three
Oboe this mofo!
Nice.
Uh, hi, Mom! I'm gonna be home late,
just, uh, finishing studying.
I got another call from Mr. Varshidi.
Again, Astrid!?
It was another misunderstanding.
Astrid Esther,
stop lying.
What has gotten into you lately!?
You come home right now!
You're grounded.
Still no redheads.
Minus Christine, but she doesn't count.
But, man, she seems pretty pissed
that Candace is taking
yearbook pics for Jonas.
I just hate doing this stuff alone.
I feel so exposed.
You're not alone.
And you've been doing awesome.
Thank God.
Bad news: I think
we're at a dead end.
Good news: it mean I can
get the hell outa here.
Who are you talking to?
Your girlfriend?
She's not my
What are you even doing up here?
Aren't you supposed to be
taking pics for the winning team?
Shouldn't you be?
Um
Had to get away from my mom.
You know, good ol' Christ
ine.
Yeah, she's been pretty intense lately.
What's her deal?
I don't know.
I know she wants to ruin my life.
Crap, I forgot to give Jonas
back his camera.
Um,
I'll be right back.
Oh, um, okay.
Ew!
Was that Candace?
Yeah, just yearbook stuff.
Okay, uh, one last look.
What the?
Okay.
I might be nuts,
but I could have sworn
I just saw furniture lady's
teeth glowing.
Okay, I got the closeups.
If you got wides, I think we're good.
Got a cool one of stupid Tate, but
I don't wanna use it.
Trouble in paradise?
Just annoyed. You know,
we were supposed to hang
after the game, but
he just cancelled on me
for the lamest reason.
That sucks.
Yeah, he told Valerie
he'd help here move
her crap for her internship.
Lame, right?
Oh, my God!
The pillow in drama class!
Uh-uh
The skinbag.
Tate's been powerlifting.
Oh, it makes sense! It's furniture lady!
She's brunette, but
Duh!
They weren't hair
fibers, they're fur fibers!
Crap!
She's gone.
I'll meet you at HQ.
What are you talking about?
Um, do me a favour? Get Tate to cancel.
- Why?
- Just do it.
I'll explain later.
Fine.
Jeez, you're a lot
bossier than I remember!
Okay.
Let's go, Candace!
Sally!
Sally, my friend
flaked at the last minute
so it's just me tonight.
Oh, that's a shame.
I
really wanted you
to nail that monologue
and
feel what it's like to
not be overlooked.
Sally, you don't look
so good. Are you
No.
But
Unfortunately
you do.
What?
Astrid, quick! The Borgati.
Oh, my God!
Ahh
Thank God we got here in time!
- Hi, girls.
- Astrid, don't stop playing!
Wait!
Are you sure that's what you want?
Oh, we are sure.
Look,
I know you've got a job to do.
I know you want the world
to be a kinder place, but
Think about it.
Those boys
Those cruel, muscle-ridden boys
Do they really make
the world a kinder place?
That's not the point.
Isn't it?
Wouldn't we be better off
without bullies like that?
Yeah, but
That's not wh
You have the power to make that happen.
This is your chance.
I mean, who have you been
taking orders from, anyway?
Brutus?
I mean, what do you
really know about him?
Oh, look
Ah
I didn't want to
hurt Val.
I adore Val.
She's just like us.
Overlooked for superficial reasons.
But if you work with me,
we can get rid of the bullies,
manipulators,
cruel tormentors.
Aren't you sick of
everybody always telling you
what you need to change about yourself?
Underestimating you?
What do you want?
Hm.
Excuse us a second.
No sudden moves!
Does she have a point?
I mean, what she said about Brutus
What do we actually know about him?
We've been blindly trusting
him and he's a monster.
He's been helping us, right?
- Yeah.
- With all this stuff.
And with Sparrow.
But, I mean
I guess we don't know him-know him?
Yeah, and we definitely don't know her.
I thought the whole point
was to get rid of the bullies?
Totally.
But then doesn't that make us the bully?
Do we want to be them?
Or do we want to be us?
- Oh, shit!
- Oi!
Oh!
Ow! My ears!
Don't stop playing!
Oh.
Note to self:
don't get sweet-talked by monsters.
They're still monsters.
Two down,
eight to go!
Oh
Okay.
Yeah. Ugh..
Yeah, hoh
Okay.
One set of slimy ew
razor teeth for the orb.
Can I just toot our own horns
here for a second
and say we pieced this all together
using our own homegrown,
frickin' detective skills.
Maybe we really can save the world!
- Okay.
- Whoo.
- Oh, yeah.
- You're good?
Oh, thanks. Okay.
- Whoo!
- Okay, let's go.
I am freaking strong, smart and capable.
A-fricking-men.
Guess what I'm wearing
to school tomorrow?
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
Oooh!
Oh, crap! Val.
Oh.
Cute shorts. We should
take your portrait today.
Oh, um, yeah, sure.
We can do that. Thanks.
That was weird.
But she's right: you look adorbs!
Mmm!
You got this.
God, you're hot.
That's not what I meant.
You know what? That
actually totally is what I meant.
Also, I think you're really interesting.
And I like you.
Whoo
Do you maybe wanna go out with me?
Like on a date?
For when I'm done being grounded
for a million years?
So, this is why
you've been acting so weird with me?
Well, I hate dates.
But, yeah.
Yeah, I'll see ya around.
Nice going.
I'm sweating! I'm sweating!
- Did you see that?
- Yeah.
- You saw the whole thing?
- Yes.
- He said
- I know.
It was amazing 'cuz I was, like,
"Oh, do you want to
go on a date with me"
and he was, like,
"Nah". Then he said yes!
Oh, my God.
Oh!
Awesome work, monster hunters!
One step closer.
P.S. Stay tuned.
And wary.
Great.
So, I think we need to have
a little chat with Brutus
about what Razor said about him.
You have to do an internship like I did.
Sally thanked me on my last day
by giving me a surprise facial.
It was so relaxing, I
literally passed out.
Look at my skin. Look at it!
I can't with that rosy glow!
Wow, Val has quite the
coping mechanism for trauma.
Do you wanna come with me
to bring this film to Jonas?
Sure.
God, you know, I think
I really am good at this.
Mm.
Oh! Uh, hey, Frick.
Where's Jonas? I gotta drop this off.
I guess Jonas didn't show today,
so Varshidi asked me
to sub in for him.
Oh, okay, weird. Um, thanks.
You don't think that
I know you're up to something.
I just don't know
what it is yet,
but I think it has something
to do with the solar system.
For the millionth time,
we're not up to anything.
And definitely not anything
to do with the sky.
Well, I have some information.
Just thought you should know
I saw an unidentified cosmic string
above coordinates 41.3684 degrees north,
82.1079 degrees
west.
You know, we're
definitely not interested
in that information.
What were the coordinates again?
It's working.