Bekaaboo (2019) s01e02 Episode Script

My name is Kiyan Roy.
And I am an erotica writer.
[Kiyan] Fame, grandeur,
money has its own place.
But I get the real kick
when they call me this.
Best selling author.
[Kiyan] Like all twisted stories
even this story starts
with a mystery.
A mysterious girl was after me.
And my life was about to change.
[Anaysha] You
don't want my brownies.
You just want to get
into my panties, right?
[Kiyan] Life might have screwed you
several times.
- This is how my life
is screwing me. - [Kashti moaning]
- Who the fk is this?
- Kashti.
[Kiyan] You won't
get what you want.
[Kashti] Once there was a king.
And there was a queen.
And then came a bh.
[Laughing]
[Kiyan] A man's biggest fantasy.
His hands are cuffed.
And a hot girl climbing
on top of him like a wild cat.
Meow.
Her intentions are not good at all.
The way you feel
a current of 440 volts
coursing through your body.
The same happened to me.
But
[Coughing]
If a man thinks from
his mind he can touch the sky.
And if he thinks
from between his legs
then he is bound
to hit the road.
This girl was forcing
me to think from there.
And there I was
on the middle of the road.
Oh fk!
[Title montage]
Fk me, man.
[Phone ringing]
What?
The word is hello.
How rude have you become?
Supriya is right.
The boy has become a celebrity.
Whose number is this?
It belongs to Supriya.
I forgot my phone at home.
What is my celebrity fiancee doing?
I am in the bathroom.
Oh. With whom?
Have you found a fan?
Please turn on the video.
Babe.
We are leaving in some time.
And I need to get ready.
And anyway.
Do you want something from Pune?
[Supriya] Surprise me, lover.
By the way,
I have a surprise for you too.
Please turn on the video once.
Girl, I am naked
and you are in office.
So what?
If you want,
even I can go to the bathroom.
Anna.
I don't know who you are.
But what have you done
to my horny boyfriend.
[Anna giggling]
Anyway, okay. Bye.
Love you.
But listen, your surprise
includes Japanese food.
- Bye.
- Bye.
[Supriya] I can't even
tell you to get a room.
You guys live together.
You are going to
get engaged in 15 days.
But your libido levels.
- [Supriya snaps finger]
- Right up there.
It's not libido, Sups.
Sometimes it takes a lot
to keep two people together.
Hey.
All okay?
Huh? Yeah.
[Natasha] What okay, Lata?
They are my kids.
They are not puppies
for them to wear lockets
so that you can recognize them.
It's been many days.
I will come home and talk to you.
Okay.
What happened?
Why aren't you ready?
[Natasha] Varun is waiting
downstairs
at the porch with the car.
There is a problem.
Problems.
I will tell you a short story.
[Natasha] Two years ago,
I was a married mom.
Then I got a surprise of triplets
and then a surprise divorce.
Lata, my lifeline keeps
mixing up my children.
To top it off Kiyan Roy
I haven't been laid for 4 months.
So don't even start
talking about problems.
Oh my God, Kiyan. I really
I do not want to have
sympathy sex with you.
You loser.
Kiyan?
What the fk.
- Please.
- Sorry.
[Natasha] What did you do?
[Natasha] What did you do, Kiyan?
- I haven't done this.
Then?
Okay, sit. Sit down.
[Natasha] Kiyan,
will you tell me what happened?
Remember my stalker idea.
She is for real.
She is for real?
Oh my God! She is for real.
[Natasha] Yes. I knew it.
I fing knew it. Do you know
what's going to happen now?
Yes.
Anaysha will cut my balls
and stuff them in my mouth.
[Natasha] That is bound to happen.
But your next book will
be a double best seller.
- Fk!
- Yes.
The next time she
calls or texts you
set her up with me and Varun.
We will make an offer
to her that she can't refuse.
Seriously?
This is what you are worried about.
And I know this stuffing
the balls thing is right.
But keep that imagination
for your book.
[Natasha] Okay?
You get packed up fast.
I am waiting for
you downstairs. Okay?
All right. Come on.
- Yeah. The press conference
was great. - [Door opens]
- Yeah. The press loved it.
- [Door closes]
The books.
[Light switch on]
[Anaysha] Konnichiwa.
I promised Japanese food.
Okay, bye.
Surprised?
That girlfriend is
so beautiful and sushi.
(giggling)
Kiyan!
[Kiyan] This is where
you make good use of your hand.
Of the other kind.
When destiny is fed up then
Well, forget it.
You asked me to surprise you.
What is your fascination
with pain? I
I don't understand.
Promise me that you
will never do this again.
No.
- Never again.
- Never.
[Kissing sounds]
Listen. Look here.
[Kiyan] When I didn't receive calls
or messages from Kashti
for a few day, I started feeling
a little normal.
[Kiyan] What do they call it?
- The silence before the storm.
- [Punching sound]
[Kiyan] And this pervert
Varun wanted to
stir up a storm
with someone silent.
Concentrate, bro.
How do I concentrate?
I can't do left or right here.
I cannot swipe left
or right on Tinder.
You don't understand.
Girls take off their panties
and throw them at you.
And even if I get a match
on Tinder
the girl blocks me
after three messages.
Just
[Kiyan] Wait
What Three messages?
The usual, man.
Dinner and fk?
Drive and fk?
Movie and fk?
And there is also a fourth option.
All of the above.
Hey you nerd.
Nothing is going to happen to you.
Give me your phone.
- My phone? Why?
- Just give it to me.
Its hidden deep inside.
Just put
Shut up.
Screw all this.
What are you doing tonight?
I have some really important plans.
Tell me.
What's your plan?
Dinner with myself.
Drinks with myself.
And later porn
With my hand.
That's an interesting plan.
But you can do it tomorrow.
Why? What's tomorrow?
You are going on a date.
With Alisha.
But is she a robot?
Is she real?
Hmm. You are welcome.
- I saved Alisha.
- Yes, you did.
[Varun] Raspberry.
[Varun] So,
I always thought that
I will meet a girl on Tinder.
And then you happened.
[Kiyan] But I swear,
this is a great place.
Yeah.
Yeah.
- [Whistle]
- Hey Varun.
[Varun] You know I
went to a girl's school to
Kiyan Roy is your friend?
Raju.
Give me a whisky. Neat.
Hmm.
It won't be right
to call him a friend.
Thank you.
I am more of a mentor to him.
Who gives him all those ideas?
- Me.
- Fk.
- That is the idea.
- What?
That's the idea. Who gave him
the idea of having sex
on the very first
date in the book?
I did.
Do you want to get introduced?
- Will you? - Yes, but what will I
get in return?
Hashtag, never been kissed.
Hashtag, just saying.
Hashtag, still a virgin.
I will French kiss you.
Blowjob?
French kiss will do. It will do.
Shall we? French
Introduction.
Kiyan, this is Alisha.
- Alisha this is
- Shh
Your brain is so sexy,
I could have sex with it, man.
[Alisha] How do you
write all that, Kiyan?
Those words.
It's all him.
- Funny.
- Actually
Sexy. Handsome.
[Alisha] Creative.
And best selling author.
- [Clearing throat]
- Oh yeah.
We should be leaving. Right?
She owes me something so
- See you.
- [Varun] Yes, let's go.
- [Varun] Okay then, bye.
- [Kiyan] Bye.
[Varun] What will I get
if I give you his number?
[Alisha] Shut up.
Babe, just please
- I am sorry.
- Kiyan, you always do this.
- What fan?
- [Phone beeping]
'Here, you have got other
fans as well.'
Babe I am just
- What the fk!
- Baby.
[Car moving]
Why did you stop me from
getting hold of that bh?
[Anaysha] I am so angry, Kiyan.
And what is this with young
girls coming up to you
you know hitting on you openly
Babe, she was just one of my fans.
I mean
You know, Anna.
You are overreacting.
You know what?
I know how to cheer you up.
[Car halting]
Slap me.
Yeah.
Just take out all
the anger inside you.
So that there is no
disturbance in what
we are going to do at home.
And Anna you know, you are right.
Tonight, it was all my fault.
I should have let you
get that girl.
I am sorry.
- You don't have to say sorry.
- Of course, I do.
And I also need
to go down on you
and make my tongue
do some repenting.
- Yes, really.
- Repenting?
Yes.
- Repentance.
- A.
- Let's go home.
- Not a but repentance.
Kiyan, Let's go home.
[Anaysha moaning]
[Laughing]
[Kiyan] The way a washer
man's dog belongs to no one
even I was in
the same predicament.
Even though I was with Anaysha
I would see Kashti in my mind.
I don't know about a washer man.
But I had surely turned into a dog.
[Varun moaning]
[Both moaning]
[Song playing]
[Anyasha moaning]
[Song playing]
Fk! Fk you!
Fk!
[Anaysha screams]
[Natasha] So today we will talk
with famous writer, Kiyan Roy.
So, Kiyan.
What are you looking for?
Nothing. I mean sorry.
[Kiyan] Can you
repeat your question again?
Every author has a journey.
- A search.
- Yes.
What are you searching for?
[Kiyan] Actually, I have already
found what I have been looking for.
Or rather I have found her.
And who is that?
You, Natasha.
- You.
- [Kiyan giggles]
I was looking for a charming,
sensible and efficient publisher.
And see, I found you.
Well that's true actually.
[Both giggling]
Moving on. Can we have some
questions from the audience please?
- [Man 3] Kiyan, sir.
- Yeah.
- [Man 3] Sir.
- Carry on.
[Man 3] What is the
name of your next book?
Um
I haven't come up with it yet.
But I will keep you posted.
[Natasha] We are already so late
and I am also very hungry.
I will call Lata.
She will have dinner served
by the time I reach home.
Have dinner with us.
No, there are 4 kids at home.
And I am the dinner.
Okay, tell me.
Why didn't you plug
your book about the stalker?
Anaysha is already so pissed.
- I don't want to upset her
any further. - Hmm.
By the way, where is Anna?
I think she has
gone to the washroom.
Kiyan, why do you look so nervous?
Hey
[Natasha] Is that
stalker doing something?
- Is she here?
- Hey
[Natasha] Dude,
it will be a great PR story
if there is a face-off between
the fiancee and the stalker.
- [Natasha] Just think about
it once. - My lady!
- Your babies are missing you.
- But I
- [Natasha] Okay, fine.
I am leaving. - [Kiyan] Bye.
[Natasha] I am leaving, Kiyan.
I am leaving. Relax.
[Kiyan] Say hi
to Lata for me. Okay.
- Okay bye.
- [Car door closes]
- [Natasha] Let's go.
- Bye.
The number you are trying to reach
is currently unavailable.
Damn!
[Phone ringing]
Hello? Where are you?
Yes, Kiyan. I am coming. Wait.
Come. Bye.
Hey.
[Theme music playing]