Phony (2026) s01e02 Episode Script

1
♪♪
-[tires skidding]
-Jesus fucking
Before everything went insane,
I had a really great life.
[slow, suspenseful music playing]
It's always kinda just been us.
[water splashing, gurgling]
They said I was out for about a week.
Hi, sweetheart. Hi.
[soft, unsettling music playing]
[Sonny] My mom,
she seems different, right?
She looks like a different fucking person.
What? Dugga, you're high, okay?
[Sonny] We had this thing that--
I love you
I-It was just the way we said
"I love you" to each other.
I love you too
[melancholy music playing]
[Mallory] So, you think that your mom
has been swapped out
with a different woman?
Yes. Yes, that is what I think.
[plastic rustling]
[Mallory]
What are you thinking?
[Sonny] That I'm going
completely fucking insane.
[person grunts]
[investigator] Okay, so what happened
after the dance?
[Sonny]
After the dance,
I spent all weekend basically
hiding in my room.
[tense music playing]
I had no idea what to do.
[sighs]
I was freaking out
just 'cause, you know,
-no one had believed me.
-[computer keys clacking]
Except for
[notifications whooshing]
Weldon.
But, yeah, that wasn't helping.
[computer keys clacking]
[car horn honking]
[wind chimes jingling]
[ominous music playing]
[wind chimes continue eerily jingling]
[door slamming shut]
Okay. [sighs] Ready to go.
[tense music playing]
[computer keys clacking]
I'm okay.
[container thudding]
♪♪
[car shuts off]
[Ellen 2]
All weekend with this.
What is going on?
I'm fine. I'm fine, I don't--
I-- I just-- I just wanna get to school.
I think that's gonna be great for me.
[computer keys clacking]
[tense music continues playing]
This car doesn't move
until you talk to me.
[computer keys clacking]
[tense music intensifying]
-[music stops abruptly]
-Don't the drivers' ed kids need this car?
[clicking tongue]
Shit.
-[engine starting]
-[tires screech]
-[Ellen 2] Your foot's on the brake.
-Wait, what?
The second brake.
-You take your foot off the brake.
-Sorry.
[eerie music playing]
[indistinct chatter]
Yeah, at school,
there were, there were
a lot of people from town
who knew my mom.
And I was hoping someone
would see a difference.
You know, they-they were there
for Career Day, which is--
[investigator]
Yeah, I know what Career Day is.
-[Sonny] Yeah, yeah, parents come, and--
-[investigator] I know.
-[speaker] Mal!
-[Sonny] tell the kids about yeah.
Hey, what are you doing?
Let's go inside.
We need to wait for Sonny.
If Sonny needs us, he can find us.
-[speaker] Mal!
-Come on. Let's--
No, okay, we're building a group,
three is a group.
[speaker] Mal! Mal.
Sweetheart, can you come
-help me with this?
-[Mallory] Oh, no. Mm-mm.
[grunting]
Here. Thank you.
Here, can you just
take this for a second?
Please? Thank you.
I'm gonna grab the donuts!
[softly] Fuck!
[student] Ow.
[group chattering, giggling]
[sighing]
She slept in my mom's bed.
She wore her clothes.
She ate our fucking food
from our pantry, like--
And she's probably
the only person who knows--
-Who knows what happened to your mom.
-Yeah, exactly!
Oh, fuck! Oh, my God,
I'm, I'm so sorry, Simon.
You're awesome. I'm gonna,
I'm gonna get you back for this,
I promise. Okay, man?
There you go, I'll get the janitor.
I'll, I'll pay you back, okay?
Fuck! I can't do this.
[softly] I can't go home
with her again, okay?
[stammers]
This has to go down.
Okay? Like, today.
What are you talking about?
Are you gonna kill her?!
What? No!
No, absolutely not.
I-I-I-I need help.
Like, real help. Like, the cops.
I think there's a police officer
at the Career Day, but
-Really?
-you don't have any evidence
so he's not going to do anything.
-I don't care, let's go!
-[school PA chiming]
[teacher] [on PA] Sonny Cooke,
please come to the counseling office.
[tense music playing]
-[music stops abruptly]
-I mean, it might be about something else.
[calm jazz music playing]
[softly chuckling]
Was this [clearing throat]
like, her idea?
Your mom?
Yeah.
Anytime there's a dispute
between two students,
either Mrs. Minard or I
will sit down, talk it out.
No biggie.
Technically, Sonny did apologize
after the dance, so, you know, we're good.
Yeah.
[foot thumping]
Guys like us
you know
"nice guys"
-[Vogel] Mm-hmm.
-we don't get rewarded for saying
what we're actually feeling
or experiencing.
Right?
[calm jazz music continues playing]
I mean, bro, are you still feeling like
you know, like, paranoid
about your mom being different?
[tense music playing]
No, 'cause that was a joke.
Dude, I mean, come on,
he's, he's a psychologist, bro.
You can, you can just talk to him.
[Jason Chang]
Sounds like a pretty weird joke.
[laughing]
I mean, in a good way.
I like weird jokes.
Do you wanna
You wanna tell me the joke?
[tense music playing]
I have to go.
[door opens, closes]
You wanna hear my album?
Album?
We gotta tell the cop!
She's gonna find out.
-How?
-Fucking Jason knows.
Mr. Chang, okay?
He's gonna tell her.
You told the guidance counselor?
No, Vogel did.
-[Weldon] Who's Vogel?
-He's my friend.
Best friend? What's he like?
"What's he like?" I don't know.
He doesn't see the change in her.
Well, he's not very trustworthy then.
-Okay, man!
-[Weldon] What?
Okay, you can't go to the cops.
They-They won't believe you.
I know a private dick.
[curious music playing]
-What?
-A--
[whispering]
A private detective.
How, how do you know them?
I know her from Front Porch Forum.
That's the thing where
people sell their compost?
It's a public forum, she's stirs it up.
She's into alternative knowledge.
So, cryptids, One World Order,
-face peelers--
-Okay, alright.
Thank you.
I need to go find the real cops.
[students chattering]
Listen, these are the last two chairs
for Career Day
because Mrs. Bergeron
from the flower shop
brought a bunch of random women.
[Chloe]
They're her employees, Ethan.
They smell like beer.
Shit, that's my girlfriend.
She doesn't know anything.
-[Weldon] Why don't you tell her?
-I don't want her to freak out.
-Bobo! Hi!
-Hey, Bobo, how are you?
-[Chloe] I'm good, how are you?
-I'm good, very good.
Where were you all weekend?
-Oh--
-Well, he doesn't have his phone.
Yeah, my phone, you know
I don't have my phone.
Oh.
This is Weldon, sorry.
-Hi! I think you're in my study hall.
-[Weldon] I am?
[Chloe] I, I got the thermostat lowered
because you said you run hot.
-[Weldon] Oh yeah! Hi.
-[Chloe] Hi.
[school PA chiming]
Shoot, I've already missed
two classes, um
-It's okay.
-It's okay. Go, go, go. You--
-I can take care of him.
-Okay.
Get to class.
-Hey, I was just gonna--
-Um, can we talk outside?
-Yeah, we'll just--
-Okay.
Is everything okay?
[Chloe]
I just wanted to read you something.
Oh, my God!
Sorry, this is so cringe
reading from my notes.
-[chuckles]
-"Sonny,
"weddings and funerals are the only times
people say how they really feel.
"But you were almost killed in your car,
"and I feel responsible
"because you were on your way
to my house so that we could
[nervously chuckles]
"you know.
"First of all, I think that
we are very similar
because we are both old souls
and secret weirdos."
-Aw.
-"Along with your mom,
-I wanna be a support to you as--"
-[phone chiming]
Oh, funny!
Your mom just texted me.
I was just talking about her.
Wait, what?
Yeah, she wants
to know where you are.
Oh, well, tell her I'm not here.
I'm just on my way out actually.
Wait, wait, what are you
typing right now?
Uh, she's on her way here right now.
[Sonny]
Okay, well, I, I [sighs]
Th-This is so sweet
what you're saying.
I really, really appreciate
that you're on my side,
but I really have to go,
and you-- and I feel like we should just
find another time
where we can talk about this, and--
-Okay!
-You look beautiful.
Hey, morning, officer.
Um, I have a quick question
for you, alright?
-I was just--
-I'm glad to see you.
Oh, thanks.
[Officer Buckley]
Your mom said you were feeling better,
but this is a big turnaround.
You've spoken to her
since th-- since the accident?
-Your mom?
-Yeah.
Yeah, man. All things considered,
with your accident,
and the break-in at your house,
I-I think she's really
-doing great.
-Wait, break-in?
Break-in at my house?
We-- I-- We had a break-in?
[Officer Buckley]
Yeah, when you were in the hospital.
Oh, maybe your mom
didn't want to stress you out.
[Sonny] Do you happen to know,
like, who broke in, and--
Maybe just don't mention that to her.
Just keep that between us.
You don't have
to worry about it.
She thinks it's just
kids screwing around.
Well, that's what she thinks,
but what do you think?
You're the, you're the--
You're the cop, you know?
Yeah.
Is there anything else
I can do for ya?
Um
I'll take a--
I'll just take a pen
-[pens clattering]
-thank you. Oh!
-Oh. Yeah.
-[pens keep clattering]
Sorry about that, sorry.
Thank you. Thanks so much.
I did. I talked to them,
and it's basically resolved.
Doesn't matter if it's resolved.
Sonny pushed Vogel unprovoked
at the dance,
and so, he should be suspended.
With all due respect, Mark,
that's not your purview.
It's literally my job.
[chuckles]
Vice principal handles student discipline.
-[Ellen 2] It's not, it's not his purview.
-This is, this is a special case, Mark.
We have a zero-tolerance policy.
She wrote it.
I wrote it.
I know what it says.
And I am fully capable
of taking care of my son.
I'm sure you can appreciate
this is a really tough time,
specifically for Ellen.
-No, I-- [sighs]
-[Jason] Okay?
But the nice part is
I think we have a shared goal here.
Which is what?
The health and-and safety
of all students.
-And you and I can--
-[cups thudding]
Can, um, huddle up later on.
I-I-I actually brought that in,
and I would rather
you don't have any.
The coffee?
[sighs]
-[office phone ringing]
-Yeah.
[coffee pouring]
She--
Okay, okay.
It-- I thought
[sighs]
[Ellen 2]
Anybody want coffee? Mark brought.
["Praise His Name" by Ray Barnette
and Thomas Woodard playing on laptop]
-Praise to the Lord ♪
-Hey.
Let Heaven and Earth praise His name ♪
-[camera shutter snapping]
-Mallory! Mallory, can you?
[Mallory]
What do you want?
So, kids keep looking for napkins,
and-and-and it would be easier
to give them prayer cards if I had a few--
You shouldn't be bribing
the kids with food.
They're actually supposed
to want to talk to you.
Could you just get me some
extra paper towel from the bathroom?
I'm technically in class right now.
This is for Yearbook.
Come on.
The bathroom is two steps away,
and I'm in a corner.
It's, uh, uh, cool if I take one?
I mean, yeah, of course.
Yeah!
[chuckling]
You know, no pressure at all,
but if you've got any questions,
uh, about working in the church,
-or faith--
-Yo Shovel, bro!
-What's good?
-What up, bro?
Ooh! Is this blue raz?
-Blueberry.
-Ah!
Cool if I grab another one?
[Pastor Alan] Go right ahead.
But here, here. Take a look at this.
Sweet.
You, uh, you got napkins?
I don't.
I don't [chuckling] have napkins.
Could you guys
grab me some napkins?
I got class, man.
Thanks for the donuts.
-[Pastor Alan] Take care.
-[students laughing]
Dad, can you actually just leave?
No one is taking this seriously.
They're laughing at you!
If I get through to one kid today,
it's gonna be worth it.
Let Heaven and Earth praise His name ♪
Let Heaven and Earth praise ♪
Hey.
Hey.
Are you okay? What's--
What are these?
I got it.
Hey, has my mom been,
like, talking to you at all?
Like, trying to keep tabs on me?
I thought she wasn't your mom.
Um, "Open Case Services."
-[Sonny] "Affordable rates."
-Two stars.
[Sonny]
That one has four stars.
Wow, but there's a lot of PIs.
God, this is so much better
than the alien lady
Weldon was talking about.
I think you should
just talk to your mom.
Tell her what's going on.
Ha-ha.
Yeah, I'm being serious.
Whoa, this guy's website's insane.
"24/7 free consultation"?
Just sits up all night waiting
for people to click on--
-Shit, here, this one.
-Don't click on it!
Why?
This is why we're here.
Rick Davis, P.I.
and notary public.
Who am I speaking with?
Oh! Uh, hey,
just one, one second, um
Um
Hey, how are you doing?
My name is Sonny Cooke.
Dude!
What?
Need to turn the camera on.
This computer doesn't have a camera.
Um, but we have some questions.
[sighs] Sound like a couple of kids.
Is this a prank?
No, no, absolutely not.
We--
[stammers] We're dealing
with a missing person.
-Got a photo of them?
-Yes.
[Mallory]
There's no camera, he can't see.
Or sorry, we'll get it over
to you, but it-- It's just--
It's a little small and, and blurry.
How long they been gone?
Uh, I was in a car accident, right?
And-And when I was
in the hospital,
there was a break-in
at my house,
and I think that's when something
might've happened to her.
Sounds pretty serious.
Yeah, um, thanks.
So
uh, the only thing is that I'm,
I-I'm the only person
who thinks she's missing.
Why?
Well, because there's another person
who's pretending to
to be her.
So, how would you, would you
approach a situation like that?
[computer chiming]
Silent exit from the chat!
That was amazing.
Sorry, man. Sorry.
This!
Can we make this bigger? Better?
Yeah. Yeah, I could do that.
[Ellen 2] When you spoke
to Sonny and Vogel,
did he mention anything
about the accident?
-Or me?
-[Jason sighs]
[office phone ringing]
[chuckles] I can't.
It-It-- It's cone of silence, right?
No, I know. [chuckles]
I just am really worried about him
'cause he's not talking to me,
so that's why, you know.
-I'll talk to him.
-Great.
And if anything comes up
that feels big,
I will let you know.
I'll Snapchat you.
[laughing]
Did you do something different
with your hair?
No.
[Sonny] It looks even more blurry
when you blow it up, I think.
-Can you, like, enhance or?
-[Mallory] Yeah.
-Can you, like, blend it to-- Or--
-Uh
-Her right. Okay, this doesn't
-[Sonny sighs]
I-Is this, like, the
-final form of it, or?
-Mm.
-Is-- No, it's okay.
-Ah, fuck! I'm actually really sorry. No.
-It's okay.
-[chuckles] No, it's really bad, no.
[Sonny] No, it's totally fine.
It's totally fine, it's, um--
-[Mallory] I'm still learning.
-[Sonny] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-It's good.
-[Mallory] So then, I'll do this one?
-[Sonny] Yeah.
-And print.
Have you heard
anyone talking about me?
What do you mean?
Nothing.
Just, if there's, you know, bad
-[nearby laughter]
-chatter.
People chatter.
It's just that, you know
my, my dad's been really,
uh, embarrassing, so
No, I haven't,
I haven't heard anything.
Oh shit, these are printing
to the main office.
Wait, what?
[tense, dramatic music playing]
♪♪
[office phone ringing]
[Jason] Can we talk?
[printer thumps]
What are these for?
Nothing, I was just-- I-I-I wanted
to make a photocopy of her,
her Costco card
so I could use it at Costco.
But it printed way too big.
'Cause you think
she seems different?
That's what you told Vogel, right?
That was just-- We were--
That was just a
[clicking tongue]
Just a funny th-thing
we were talking about.
I kinda also see a difference,
by the way.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Moms, man.
[tense music playing]
You know, when we're kids,
they keep us safe
[Vogel]
Hey, uh, Sonny!
[Jason] and we kinda
mistake that for a promise.
Yo, bro, look, I'm-I'm sorry
about telling Jason
about your mom stuff earlier.
It's all good, bro.
Don't worry about it.
[Vogel] I mean, come on, if something
was really different with her,
wouldn't I notice?
-[Jason] And
-Yeah.
[Jason]
we blame 'em.
Probably. I don't,
I don't know, man.
We blame 'em
for the shitty world.
[audience applauding]
[Ellen 2] Also, I wanna thank
all the professionals
who came out today.
-Give yourselves a round of applause.
-[crowd applauding]
I had a lot of jobs,
and a lot of life,
before I became a principal.
I didn't really find my calling
until my son was born, Sonny.
He was the reason
that I wanted to do this, so--
Sorry, I'm
I get a little emotional
when I talk about careers!
-[Ellen 2 laughing]
-[applause]
Oh, man.
Sonny, you just went through
something really crazy.
This car accident,
this is heavy.
I, I can see why you would want
to pin that on your mom.
But the only way forward
is for you two to start connecting.
[applause continues]
[scoffs quietly]
Let's go see your alien lady, okay?
[dramatic music playing]
Hey, wait,
I can give you a ride.
["I Am the Fly" by Wire playing]
Yeah, okay.
[e-scooter rumbling]
Crawling ♪
Over your window ♪
-Doesn't look like a business.
-[dog barking]
-You've been here before?
-No.
-I'm waiting for the divergent wasp ♪
-This is amazing.
To complete my current ruse ♪
[sighs] Oh, God.
You use a plate-glass screen ♪
-[barking continues]
-To protect my chosen target ♪
-[speaker] Hey!
-Oh, fuck.
Uh-uh.
This is private property.
I'm Moo-- MooseMan340.
Who?
From the forums.
[Sonny]
So, I walked out of her speech,
and Weldon brought me up here,
and yeah.
[inhales sharply]
Look, I talk a lot of shit
on the town forums,
but I think your friend out there
might have the wrong idea
about what I do.
Aren't you a PI?
Sometimes.
But what you've just told me
is not a case.
What about the break-in at my house?
Sounds like kids messing around.
And the hand squeeze?
[winces]
Look, Weldon said
you were open to shit
that other people
aren't open to.
You got money?
A little.
I had a dishwashing job.
So
[chair rattling]
Did you tell him
I was a sucker?!
No.
What's their names?
Crosby, Stills, and Nash.
They're trackers.
I loan 'em out to Fish and Wildlife.
[Sonny] Hey, so, uh
-[metal bowls clanging]
-Do-- Are you gonna help me?
No.
You seem like a confused kid
who wants some attention.
[Sonny] Hey!
I'm not, I'm not someone
who does this, okay? I'm not--
I'm not interested
in weird shit.
I don't f-freak out
about anything.
I don't even have
strong opinions, okay?
This is the first time,
maybe in my whole life,
where I just
I know something, okay?
I fucking know it.
I know it, I know it.
And everybody
thinks I'm crazy,
but something's wrong.
Something's deeply fucked up.
With her.
Not with me.
[birds chirping]
[sniffles]
Well
Yep. [sighs]
I know what it's like
to be called crazy.
But all you really need is
one person to believe you.
Or two people.
[Sharla]
Yep, two people.
Two weird people.
-[dog barking]
-Hey!
If we're gonna work together,
I need some time.
Alright?
I gotta get my bearings,
figure out something concrete.
So, you're gonna help me?
[soft, hopeful music playing]
-[sniffles]
-[music stops]
Okay, goodnight.
[tense music playing]
[Sharla]
If we're gonna solve this
there's some questions
we need answers to.
♪♪
What's her motive?
Why is she doing this?
[eerie music playing]
[sex toy buzzing,
making dolphin squeaking sounds]
-[teens laughing]
-[siren chirping]
[Officer Buckley] [on PA]
Stop while you're ahead, guys.
Shoplifting is a misdemeanor,
-but evading arrest can be a felony.
-[teen] Go, go!
-[teens laughing]
-Go!
[Sharla]
And is she working with anyone?
Does she have an accomplice?
-[branch thwacks]
-Fuck, ow!
Dylan!
Fuck you guys.
Yo!
[Sharla]
'Cause there's no way a person disappears
without a trace.
Fuck you guys!
[Sharla]
It's always the same
[eerie, ominous music playing]
somebody saw something.
[panting]
[eerie, ominous music continues]
[car door opens, closes]
-[music intensifying]
-[plastic rustling]
[panting]
["I Remember"
by Molly Drake playing]
In the rainy April weather ♪
And came upon the little inn
that we had found together ♪
The landlord gave us
toast and tea ♪
And stopped to share a joke ♪
And I remember firelight ♪
I remember firelight ♪
I remember firelight ♪
And you remember smoke ♪
We ran about
the meadow grass ♪
With all the harebells bending ♪
And shaking
in the summer wind ♪
A summer never-ending ♪
We wandered
to the little stream ♪
Among the river flats ♪
And I remember willow trees ♪
I remember willow trees ♪
I remember willow trees ♪
And you remember gnats ♪
[gentle piano keys playing,
music fades out]
[voice]
Sew faster.
[fanfare playing]