Roswell s01e02 Episode Script
The Morning After
- Previously on Roswell.
- Liz! There's a bullet hole in the dress.
I'm telling you.
The girl was shot.
Thank you, Sheriff.
Your work is done now.
We'll take it from here.
Blastoff! Yeah! Where are you from? Up north? - You can't talk to anyone about this.
- Oh, my God.
You told her.
You have to promise me that you are not gonna flip out.
Hey, it's me.
[Screaming.]
What do you make of that mark? The photo was marked 1959.
So with this picture, what we're saying is there's more of us? - We're just - Different.
I'm gonna find out what the truth is, and you can count on it.
[Liz Narrating.]
September 27.
I'm Liz Parker, and I'll never look at the stars in the sky the same way again.
I'll never look at anything the same way again.
What did Max Evans mean when he said, 'I'll see you in school"? Was it, 'I won't be able to breathe until we meet again"? Or was itjust something someone says to, like, fill space? And what is he thinking right now? Is he also obsessed, tortured going from one sleepless night to the next wondering what's gonna happen between us? [Snoring.]
[Window Opening.]
- [Shouts, Indistinct.]
- Don't hit me.
[Sighs.]
- Argument with Hank? - Couldn't sleep.
- Hey, I was sleeping.
- Amazing.
- What's amazing? - That you can sleep when the key to our entire existence is out there.
- Michael - Max, listen.
That picture Valenti showed Liz it means there's someone else out there, someone who was here in 1959.
That means he was here when it crashed.
He knows where we come from.
He knows who we are.
He knows why we're here.
Maybe he knows how we get back.
Michael, I know how you feel.
Believe me.
I wanna know too.
But the sheriffhas that picture.
So, we'll never see it.
I mean, that would be impossible.
Right? Michael? #[Rock.]
#[Continues.]
#[Ends.]
I mean, what do we even know about these people? Nothing.
How do we know that they're not three feet tall, green and slimy? - I guess we don't.
- And you know what else doesn't, like, particularly please me? These powers.
How do we know they can't just, like wiggle their noses and, like, poof us into an oblivion? I guess we don't.
Okay, you're being, like, so casual about this.
I want to choke you.
Liz, we are dealing with aliens.
- Oh! - #[Dance.]
- Can you please not say that word in public? - [Sighs.]
The point is, we don't know anything about these Czechoslovakians.
Are they good Czechoslovakians? Bad Czechoslovakians? We don't know.
They're just random Czechoslovakians.
- For all we know, they don't have their passport.
- Who's Czechoslovakian? - Hey.
- Hey.
Hey.
So, who's Czechoslovakian? - The new kid at school.
- Uh, the guy at the hardware store.
The new kid at school who works at the hardware store.
- Exactly.
- Oh.
- What about him? - Nothing.
- Nothing.
Fantastic.
Czechoslovakian, 9:00.
Okay, that guy creeps me out.
Really close up.
Really close up.
You know what I mean by close up? [Liz Narrating.]
The thing about Czechoslovakians that you have to sort of factor in is they have these incredibly soulful eyes.
That is totally not Mr.
Singer.
[Bell Ringing.]
Hi.
I'm Kathleen Topolsky.
I'll be substituting for Mr.
Singer, who's out sick for a few days.
- I hope he's seriously ill.
- So the infamous Roswell, New Mexico.
Before we get down to work, let me just ask.
Does anyone here actually believe in aliens? [Students Laughing.]
Okay, let's take roll.
- Uh, Bartley? - Here.
- Collins? - Here.
- Evans? - Here.
Guerin? Michael Guerin? Is he here today? Does anyone know where Michael is? Evans, right? - Max Evans.
- Yeah.
Do you know where Michael Guerin is? Uh, Michael's not really into geometry.
- [Students Chuckling.]
- He's not into it.
Well, I guess I can understand that.
Pretty uninspiring stuff.
So, let's open our books to page 228.
[Bell Ringing.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
- How's it goin'? - Good.
Um, you know, things are just things are just normal, you know? - Completely normal.
- Good.
Um - So, was that weird? - What? That substitute just asked all of those questions about Michael.
You know, um, what was that about? She was just taking attendance.
Right.
Liz, don't worry about it.
No one's suspicious of Michael.
It's me.
- Right.
Okay.
- Hi, Liz.
- Hey, Isabel.
- Hi.
- We should go.
- Right.
Good morning.
Mornin'.
Um - who is that? - F.
B.
I.
Agent Hart.
- Who's he here to talk to? - No one, far as I can tell.
Well, what's he doin' here? Doesn't appear to be doin' anything.
He's just been sittin' there since 7:00 a.
m.
[Chuckles.]
Deputy Hanson did you ask him what he's doin' here? Yes, sir.
He said that he was here on assignment and that we should go about our business as usual.
Oh.
So, your response to that was just to All right.
Agent Hart, I'm Sheriff Valenti.
Can I see some identification, please? Sorry about the intrusion.
I'm here on assignment, Sheriff.
You should just go about business As usual.
Yeah, I heard.
See, my problem with that is that having a federal agent sitting smack-dab in the middle of my station house isn't exactly, uh, business as usual.
My orders are not to leave this chair until I'm relieved.
Uh-huh.
Agent Hart the F.
B.
I.
Has nojurisdiction here.
Now, I'm gonna ask you to please get up and leave and take your folding chair with you.
It's impossible, right, that she's not who she says she is? Well, no one is who they say they are.
But, I mean, what do you mean, exactly? Forget it.
What, that that she's a spy? - No.
Don't be ridiculous.
- Because that kind of stuff happens, you know.
- Now you're being crazy.
Come on.
Go on.
- No Well, think about it.
She takes attendance.
What substitute teacher takes attendance? I mean, God, the whole thing's so Roswellian.
I'm-I'm telling you, Liz, she's been sent here.
Why would she be sent here? To find the Czechoslovakians.
- Sniff some cedar oil, Maria.
- [Sighs.]
Which makes me feel that much more about what I already thought before you told me about this, which is that we should definitely, definitely, definitely tell Alex.
No! Look, Maria, we mustn't tell anyone ever.
Ever.
"Mustn't"? When have you ever said "mustn't"? Look, we need someone with a little perspective, okay? There's all this stuff happening, and it's dangerous.
The other day, the sheriff asked me all these questions, and now with this Topolsky person poking around You know, that's what they do.
They send in special government task forces.
Alien hunters, okay? And suddenly we're, like, accessories to Czechoslovakians.
We need Alex in on this.
[Alex.]
I'm not double-jointed.
It's I mean, I can just do it.
I don't know.
Admittedly, he's notJames Bond but he's all we've got right now.
What? Oh, so now I'm a freak? Kyle Valenti headed this way.
- Like, in this general direction, or, like, towards me? - Like, the latter.
- Oh, God.
- What are you gonna say? I don't even know that there's anything to say.
I saw him over the summer, and it was casual.
I am sure now that we're back in school, he's just thinking of me as a summer thing.
Liz.
[Chuckles.]
- Kyle.
- How's my girl? See ya.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- How's it goin'? - Good.
You know, I'm just pretty loaded down with all this school stuff.
Yeah, I know.
You take all that stuff pretty seriously.
Yeah.
Right.
Okay.
- Okay.
All right.
- Listen, Liz.
I think it's important that we're honest with each other.
I was talking to Tommy Hoeg on the team, and he agrees with me.
A person should be on time, Liz.
I know we've left things casual, and I understand that.
But you did say that you would meet me at the Crash Festival.
And I just feel if you care about a person, which I do then you should be on time.
The truth is if you werejust some girl and you stiffed me on a date, I'd walk in a second.
- But you're not.
You're not just some - I really wanna talk to you now.
I do, but, it's just not a good time.
I'm sorry.
I gotta go.
I'm sorry.
- Oh, my God! - [Gasps.]
Oh, my gosh.
I'm sorry.
I'm-I'm sorry about that.
- Parker, Liz.
- Yeah.
- Photographic memory.
- Wow, that's interesting.
I've never met anybody with a photographic memory before.
Helps in my line of work.
Here, um, let me help you with those.
Oh, no.
That's okay.
- [Coughing.]
- [Man On TV, Indistinct.]
Hi.
Um, I'm looking for Michael? - Guerin? - Mm-hmm.
Maybe I made a mistake.
Mickey! [TVContinues.]
Let's go outside.
Come on.
You're sure it was my records? It was definitely my records? Yeah.
- She asked about me in class? - Oh, well, she was just taking attendance.
So when you weren't there, she asked the class if anyone knew you.
- So she's looking for me.
- I don't know what's going on, Michael.
- I just thought I should tell you.
- Thanks.
- Sure.
- Listen.
Lf, uh, Hank insulted you or anything - Oh, no, no.
- You kinda have to ignore him.
Sorry to just show up here.
It's where I live.
Thanks.
Yeah, I know it's late, but he sent an agent into my building.
I think I've got a right to an immediate explanation.
No, I won't call back.
No, tomorrow is not acceptable.
Yeah, I'm sorry about it too.
Listen - No, excuse me.
Ex - [Dial Tone.]
Hello? Hello? Hi.
Can I help you? Uh, good evening, Deputy.
- I'm selling candies for charity.
- Charity? Yeah.
I'm on the committee to reopen Westlake Orphanage.
Deputy Hanson, you can be a part of helping to find homes for dozens of children in need.
Single boxes are $6 apiece.
And I feel obliged to strongly recommend the peanut clusters.
They are good.
Well, I'm kind of trying to lay off the sweets right now.
Understood, Deputy.
If it's all right, I'll just take a look and see who else is around.
There's nobody up that corridor.
Um, what if I came back tomorrow night? Well, it's usually pretty empty at night.
Well, thanks for your help, Deputy.
What are you doing here? - I'm selling candies for charity.
- Not in here, you're not.
Yes, sir.
[Isabel.]
Are you insane? [Isabel.]
Are you insane? I didn't just wander in, all right? I had a cover story.
- And what was your cover story? - I was selling candies for charity.
Peanut cluster? - And they bought it? - No, they all seemed to be on a diet.
Not the candy, Einstein.
The story.
Yeah, they bought the story.
Why are you wearing that? Because, Michael, I have a date with a guy that I like.
In fact, I like my whole life here.
In fact, I have a date next Friday that I'm hoping I won't have to miss because I'm running from the law.
You two, the point is this.
That file has got to be in Valenti's office.
All right, he leaves for the day at 7:30.
There's no one else in the entire wing of the sheriff s station.
We go in, we find the file we get the info, we put the file back So how do we break in, hypothetically? The window.
It's got a lock on it.
It's nothing you can't handle.
Alarm system? Hypothetically.
Piece of cake.
Even I could deactivate it.
Max, don't humor him, okay? I can't believe you're even considering this.
I just wanna know how feasible the plan is.
Which it's not feasible.
- It's not feasible, Michael.
- This is what we've been waiting for our entire lives.
I mean, this is the first time we've ever had any clue that might tell us who we are.
- We don't have a choice.
- [Philip.]
Hey.
! [Diane.]
Anybody here? And with government agents after us, we oughta get our asses in gear.
- Agents? - What are you talking about? - Talk to Liz.
- [Philip.]
Anybody hungry? - Hey, guys, we got pizza.
Hi, honey.
- Hey.
You look pretty.
Michael.
Hi.
Hey, I was just leaving.
- We got plenty of pizza.
- My dad's cooking.
- Thanks, though.
- Well, I'm starved.
Come on, guys.
Plates, napkins.
Let's eat.
So we know that the sum of "A," "B," and "C" equals 360 degrees.
- [Whispering.]
What's she talking about? - Miss Parker? I'm sorry? It's a triangle.
You know, the sum of the parts would be 180 degrees.
[Chuckling.]
Right.
Right, of course.
Equals 180 degrees.
- But she pulled other students' records? - Well, yeah.
But the point is is she pulled Michael's.
- Well, how many others were there? - I don't know.
- Maybe 10.
- Well, 10's a lot.
Okay, it might have only been five.
I'm not sure how many there were.
You can't just show up at Michael's and get him riled up like that.
You don't know him.
He's not big into "Let's go over our options.
" He acts on things.
Look, I'm sorry.
I just thought that Michael was in danger and that I'd better tell him.
In danger of what? I don't know.
I have no idea.
Look, I am just saying that if there is a spy among us don't you think it behooves us to do something about it? - Spy? - Well, yeah.
- Liz, listen - No, Max, that sort of thing exists, doesn't it? There's, like, special branches of the government.
Alien hunters, you know, that sort of thing.
So you think Miss Topolsky is an alien hunter? When you say it like that, it sounds ridiculous.
Liz thank you, you know, for looking out for us.
But we have to go on with life as it was before this happened.
And we have to be careful now.
All of us.
You too.
[Maria.]
The eraser room? Huh.
Liz, do you know what the second floor eraser room means? Of course I know what it means.
What does it mean? It's where Greg Coleman gave Marlene Garcia that hickey the size of a softball.
It's where Richie Ruehl and Amanda Lourdes consummated everything.
Okay, Maria, you know what? You're just making this into something that it's not.
Liz, I don't think you should do this, okay? I mean, we don't know what can happen.
I mean the guy touched you, and you saw into his soul.
How do we know what happens if he kisses you? How do we know what it is to be kissed by a Czechoslovakian? You don't.
Okay, Maria, no one is kissing anyone here.
I mean, Max isn't even the least bit interested in me.
He said that things were just like they used to be before.
Nothing's changed.
He said that.
Oh, my God.
It's not just kissing that goes on in the eraser room, Liz.
She's got that right.
All right, the eraser room does two things cleans erasers and takes our innocence.
Do you know what I mean by "takes our innocence," Liz? The eraser room has taken some of the best of us.
[Knock At Door.]
- Afternoon, Sheriff.
- Agent Stevens.
What, you don't write, you don't call.
L-I'm sorry about kicking Junior out of here the other day but he had no jurisdiction.
- No offense.
- None taken.
So what'd you guys find on that waitress uniform? Well, several things actually, Sheriff.
Tomatoes, salt, water, sugar, vinegar.
Ketchup, Sheriff.
No blood.
We've wasted enough taxpayer dollars on trying to find something that isn't out there.
No spaceship landed here in 1947.
No aliens are currently residing in Roswell, New Mexico.
I've been given the authority by the governor to search the premises and remove any information pertaining to U.
F.
O.
S alien sightings, and other alleged paranormal occurrences in this county.
This thing is over, Sheriff.
Let's get on with it, guys.
You found blood on the dress.
I mean, why else would you care enough to remove my files? Wouldn't that be a waste of taxpayer dollars? It's locked.
This won't take long.
Thank you, Sheriff.
Make yourselves at home.
I'm goin' to lunch.
So, um, this is the eraser room.
I've never been here before.
I just thought we should be somewhere private.
Right.
You were right about Topolsky.
She isn't who she appears to be.
Oh.
She's been using this office so I thought we should find out why she's here.
Yeah.
She has off sixth and seventh periods, so we might be here a while.
[Car Alarm Chirps.]
Okay, I'm still confused.
If you crash-landed in 1947, are you really 16 or are you, like, Or do you guys just age differently? I mean, is, like, one alien year equal to three human years? You've thought about this a lot, haven't you? Kind of.
Well, we know we came out of the pods in 1989.
We just don't know how long we were there.
When we came out, we looked like six year olds.
So were you, like, green? - Green? - Before you took human form were you three feet tall and green and slimy? You know, I'm very sorry about asking you that.
It's Maria's question.
Um, no.
We just always looked like this.
Except for the, uh, third eye.
Right.
Kidding.
Yeah.
I knew you were kidding.
You're such a jerk.
[Cart Approaching.]
So you really have no idea where you're from like, what planet, or who your people are besides Michael and Isabel? No idea.
Well, that must be kind of freeing in a way.
Freeing? Um, well, just with me.
You know, my parents own the Crashdown so everyone in town knows who I am.
If I so much as get a haircut everyone seems to notice and they have to give me their opinion on it.
It kind of makes life claustrophobic.
It's like, you know, how am I ever supposed to become whoever it is that I'm gonna become while everyone's looking? You know? Sometimes I wish I could just be invisible.
Sometimes I wish I didn't have to be so invisible.
[Door Opens.]
[Topolsky.]
Okay.
I've looked through all of them, and this is where I wanna get started.
Michael Guerin.
Have you interviewed him yet? [Topolsky.]
He hasn't set foot in school since I've been here.
But if Muhammad doesn't come to the mountain - You want me to go talk to him? - No, I'll do it.
Just check and make sure the address is correct.
You got it.
[Door Opens, Closes.]
- Five minutes.
- Right.
- Something's up.
- They're taking things out of the sheriff s office.
- What? - Some guy in a suit, so we gotta get in there.
It's now or never, Max.
You know, I'd steer you to this side of the menu.
Oh, excuse me.
Where have you been? - I need you to cover for me.
- When? - Tonight.
- Oh, no.
It's a zoo.
Excuse me? I've been waiting for my Hot Fudge Blastoff - for, like, 20 minutes.
- Yeah, like he needs 80 grams of fat.
Okay, so one trip to the eraser room, and you're, like, above working? Go get your uniform on, Madonna.
The masses are demanding alien-themed greasy food and, by God, it is our job to serve it to them.
Look, Maria, this is really important.
I promise I will tell you everything later.
You're the best, but right now I've gotta go.
Okay, I want some answers, all right? 'Cause first of all there are rumors going around that last week you were shot here in the cafe.
And then at the Crash Festival, you were seemingly run over by a car, but then you weren't.
And every time I walk up to you two, you go silent or you make up some ridiculous story about Czechoslovakia which is a country that has not existed for 10 years.
So I want the truth, and I want it now.
Alex, the reason that we keep on changing the subject - is - Cramps.
- We have cramps, Alex.
- Yeah.
And we didn't even want to talk about it in front of you because we thought that it would just make you feel really uncomfortable.
- But if you really want to know, we can tell you.
- In really excruciating detail.
No! I'm eating.
Thank you.
- It's important to me too.
- All you wanna do is protect what you got here in Roswell.
- That's right, I do.
- Did you ever think about what it's like here for me, Max? Of course I have.
Look, the woman who pulled your records, she's on the way to your place.
- What? - Just stay away from there tonight.
Isabel is waiting for you at our house.
- Just go there and wait.
- Wait for her to come find me? Don't do anything stupid.
Let's go.
- [Engine Starts.]
- Liz? So how did you end up where you ended up and, um, Michael ended up here? It's a long story.
Is his foster father always, uh, so Tough? Yeah.
- [Object Clatters.]
- My ring! Oh, my God! Liz, get get up.
Liz Sorry to bother you.
I'm looking for Michael.
- Liz! - Kyle! - Hey, Max.
What's goin' on? - Hey, Kyle.
- [Whispering.]
Nothing.
- Why are you whispering? We're just, uh, waiting for Michael.
- We're gonna go, um - Bowl.
- Why are you whispering? - We're going bowling.
- Liz, what were you doing down there? - I dropped my ring.
- Why are you whispering? - I'm gonna give you my number.
- Mm-hmm.
- And could you have Michael call me? - Bowling? - Yes.
- What? What? - Max.
[Kyle.]
What are you doing? Maybe when this all blows over you and I could get lunch or something.
- Lunch? - Yeah, if you want.
So, like, in the caf? - Sure.
- Okay, great.
It's a date.
No! It's not a date.
It's a lunch.
Lunch.
Right.
I better get home.
Yeah, yeah, me too.
Good night, Liz.
Good night.
#[Rock Ballad.]
#[Ends.]
Michael's AWOL.
You know the guy doesn't know how to control his powers.
I know.
Okay, you get Michael out of there.
I'll keep Valenti out of his office as long as I can.
- [Car Door Closes.]
- Right.
- Forget somethin'? - Papers.
Sheriff? I'm so glad someone's here.
I have a flat tire and I am so not mechanical.
Sheriff? You're off duty, Sheriff.
I'd be happy to help the young lady out.
It's okay, Deputy.
I got it.
Michael, let's go, now.
Valenti's back.
Let's go.
! Michael.
! Wait here.
Let's go.
Let's go.
One, two three.
Told you it was no big deal.
There you go.
You're all set, Miss Evans.
Thanks.
Thanks a lot.
- Isabel, right? - Yeah.
- [Starts Engine.]
- You're out past curfew.
Well, I had a flat tire.
Right.
Where's Max tonight? Oh, I have no idea.
I'm just his sister, not his keeper.
Thanks again.
Nothing.
- [Gasps.]
- What'd you see? Ricky Martin in the shower.
Hey.
Sorry about before.
Maybe I don't really know what it's like for you.
The thing I've realized is The fact that my life basically sucks is a good thing.
It's easier.
We always have to be able to leave, pack a suitcase, go somewhere else.
Maybe 10 years from now, maybe a week from now.
Maybe tomorrow.
So my advice: Don't get in too deep, Maximilian.
It only makes us weaker.
Miss Parker? I have some questions for you about Michael Guerin.
Your friend Michael is in serious trouble.
I'm not a substitute teacher.
I saw you at Michael's house last night.
- I'm the new guidance counselor.
- Guidance counselor.
And Michael is a boy who's in serious danger of being expelled from this school.
If you're really a friend, you'll talk to him and you'll have him come in and meet with me soon.
Are you with me, Miss Parker? - I'll tell him.
- Thank you.
[Liz Narrating.]
Since I found out about Max and Michael and Isabel I've been thinking a lot about secrets.
That for everyone who has a secret there's someone else who needs to know what that secret is How sometimes secrets keep people from feeling like they belong.
And sometimes, secrets make you feel like you do belong.
And now, even I, Liz Parker the smallest of small-town girls with the simplest oflives even I have something to hide.
- Liz! There's a bullet hole in the dress.
I'm telling you.
The girl was shot.
Thank you, Sheriff.
Your work is done now.
We'll take it from here.
Blastoff! Yeah! Where are you from? Up north? - You can't talk to anyone about this.
- Oh, my God.
You told her.
You have to promise me that you are not gonna flip out.
Hey, it's me.
[Screaming.]
What do you make of that mark? The photo was marked 1959.
So with this picture, what we're saying is there's more of us? - We're just - Different.
I'm gonna find out what the truth is, and you can count on it.
[Liz Narrating.]
September 27.
I'm Liz Parker, and I'll never look at the stars in the sky the same way again.
I'll never look at anything the same way again.
What did Max Evans mean when he said, 'I'll see you in school"? Was it, 'I won't be able to breathe until we meet again"? Or was itjust something someone says to, like, fill space? And what is he thinking right now? Is he also obsessed, tortured going from one sleepless night to the next wondering what's gonna happen between us? [Snoring.]
[Window Opening.]
- [Shouts, Indistinct.]
- Don't hit me.
[Sighs.]
- Argument with Hank? - Couldn't sleep.
- Hey, I was sleeping.
- Amazing.
- What's amazing? - That you can sleep when the key to our entire existence is out there.
- Michael - Max, listen.
That picture Valenti showed Liz it means there's someone else out there, someone who was here in 1959.
That means he was here when it crashed.
He knows where we come from.
He knows who we are.
He knows why we're here.
Maybe he knows how we get back.
Michael, I know how you feel.
Believe me.
I wanna know too.
But the sheriffhas that picture.
So, we'll never see it.
I mean, that would be impossible.
Right? Michael? #[Rock.]
#[Continues.]
#[Ends.]
I mean, what do we even know about these people? Nothing.
How do we know that they're not three feet tall, green and slimy? - I guess we don't.
- And you know what else doesn't, like, particularly please me? These powers.
How do we know they can't just, like wiggle their noses and, like, poof us into an oblivion? I guess we don't.
Okay, you're being, like, so casual about this.
I want to choke you.
Liz, we are dealing with aliens.
- Oh! - #[Dance.]
- Can you please not say that word in public? - [Sighs.]
The point is, we don't know anything about these Czechoslovakians.
Are they good Czechoslovakians? Bad Czechoslovakians? We don't know.
They're just random Czechoslovakians.
- For all we know, they don't have their passport.
- Who's Czechoslovakian? - Hey.
- Hey.
Hey.
So, who's Czechoslovakian? - The new kid at school.
- Uh, the guy at the hardware store.
The new kid at school who works at the hardware store.
- Exactly.
- Oh.
- What about him? - Nothing.
- Nothing.
Fantastic.
Czechoslovakian, 9:00.
Okay, that guy creeps me out.
Really close up.
Really close up.
You know what I mean by close up? [Liz Narrating.]
The thing about Czechoslovakians that you have to sort of factor in is they have these incredibly soulful eyes.
That is totally not Mr.
Singer.
[Bell Ringing.]
Hi.
I'm Kathleen Topolsky.
I'll be substituting for Mr.
Singer, who's out sick for a few days.
- I hope he's seriously ill.
- So the infamous Roswell, New Mexico.
Before we get down to work, let me just ask.
Does anyone here actually believe in aliens? [Students Laughing.]
Okay, let's take roll.
- Uh, Bartley? - Here.
- Collins? - Here.
- Evans? - Here.
Guerin? Michael Guerin? Is he here today? Does anyone know where Michael is? Evans, right? - Max Evans.
- Yeah.
Do you know where Michael Guerin is? Uh, Michael's not really into geometry.
- [Students Chuckling.]
- He's not into it.
Well, I guess I can understand that.
Pretty uninspiring stuff.
So, let's open our books to page 228.
[Bell Ringing.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
- How's it goin'? - Good.
Um, you know, things are just things are just normal, you know? - Completely normal.
- Good.
Um - So, was that weird? - What? That substitute just asked all of those questions about Michael.
You know, um, what was that about? She was just taking attendance.
Right.
Liz, don't worry about it.
No one's suspicious of Michael.
It's me.
- Right.
Okay.
- Hi, Liz.
- Hey, Isabel.
- Hi.
- We should go.
- Right.
Good morning.
Mornin'.
Um - who is that? - F.
B.
I.
Agent Hart.
- Who's he here to talk to? - No one, far as I can tell.
Well, what's he doin' here? Doesn't appear to be doin' anything.
He's just been sittin' there since 7:00 a.
m.
[Chuckles.]
Deputy Hanson did you ask him what he's doin' here? Yes, sir.
He said that he was here on assignment and that we should go about our business as usual.
Oh.
So, your response to that was just to All right.
Agent Hart, I'm Sheriff Valenti.
Can I see some identification, please? Sorry about the intrusion.
I'm here on assignment, Sheriff.
You should just go about business As usual.
Yeah, I heard.
See, my problem with that is that having a federal agent sitting smack-dab in the middle of my station house isn't exactly, uh, business as usual.
My orders are not to leave this chair until I'm relieved.
Uh-huh.
Agent Hart the F.
B.
I.
Has nojurisdiction here.
Now, I'm gonna ask you to please get up and leave and take your folding chair with you.
It's impossible, right, that she's not who she says she is? Well, no one is who they say they are.
But, I mean, what do you mean, exactly? Forget it.
What, that that she's a spy? - No.
Don't be ridiculous.
- Because that kind of stuff happens, you know.
- Now you're being crazy.
Come on.
Go on.
- No Well, think about it.
She takes attendance.
What substitute teacher takes attendance? I mean, God, the whole thing's so Roswellian.
I'm-I'm telling you, Liz, she's been sent here.
Why would she be sent here? To find the Czechoslovakians.
- Sniff some cedar oil, Maria.
- [Sighs.]
Which makes me feel that much more about what I already thought before you told me about this, which is that we should definitely, definitely, definitely tell Alex.
No! Look, Maria, we mustn't tell anyone ever.
Ever.
"Mustn't"? When have you ever said "mustn't"? Look, we need someone with a little perspective, okay? There's all this stuff happening, and it's dangerous.
The other day, the sheriff asked me all these questions, and now with this Topolsky person poking around You know, that's what they do.
They send in special government task forces.
Alien hunters, okay? And suddenly we're, like, accessories to Czechoslovakians.
We need Alex in on this.
[Alex.]
I'm not double-jointed.
It's I mean, I can just do it.
I don't know.
Admittedly, he's notJames Bond but he's all we've got right now.
What? Oh, so now I'm a freak? Kyle Valenti headed this way.
- Like, in this general direction, or, like, towards me? - Like, the latter.
- Oh, God.
- What are you gonna say? I don't even know that there's anything to say.
I saw him over the summer, and it was casual.
I am sure now that we're back in school, he's just thinking of me as a summer thing.
Liz.
[Chuckles.]
- Kyle.
- How's my girl? See ya.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- How's it goin'? - Good.
You know, I'm just pretty loaded down with all this school stuff.
Yeah, I know.
You take all that stuff pretty seriously.
Yeah.
Right.
Okay.
- Okay.
All right.
- Listen, Liz.
I think it's important that we're honest with each other.
I was talking to Tommy Hoeg on the team, and he agrees with me.
A person should be on time, Liz.
I know we've left things casual, and I understand that.
But you did say that you would meet me at the Crash Festival.
And I just feel if you care about a person, which I do then you should be on time.
The truth is if you werejust some girl and you stiffed me on a date, I'd walk in a second.
- But you're not.
You're not just some - I really wanna talk to you now.
I do, but, it's just not a good time.
I'm sorry.
I gotta go.
I'm sorry.
- Oh, my God! - [Gasps.]
Oh, my gosh.
I'm sorry.
I'm-I'm sorry about that.
- Parker, Liz.
- Yeah.
- Photographic memory.
- Wow, that's interesting.
I've never met anybody with a photographic memory before.
Helps in my line of work.
Here, um, let me help you with those.
Oh, no.
That's okay.
- [Coughing.]
- [Man On TV, Indistinct.]
Hi.
Um, I'm looking for Michael? - Guerin? - Mm-hmm.
Maybe I made a mistake.
Mickey! [TVContinues.]
Let's go outside.
Come on.
You're sure it was my records? It was definitely my records? Yeah.
- She asked about me in class? - Oh, well, she was just taking attendance.
So when you weren't there, she asked the class if anyone knew you.
- So she's looking for me.
- I don't know what's going on, Michael.
- I just thought I should tell you.
- Thanks.
- Sure.
- Listen.
Lf, uh, Hank insulted you or anything - Oh, no, no.
- You kinda have to ignore him.
Sorry to just show up here.
It's where I live.
Thanks.
Yeah, I know it's late, but he sent an agent into my building.
I think I've got a right to an immediate explanation.
No, I won't call back.
No, tomorrow is not acceptable.
Yeah, I'm sorry about it too.
Listen - No, excuse me.
Ex - [Dial Tone.]
Hello? Hello? Hi.
Can I help you? Uh, good evening, Deputy.
- I'm selling candies for charity.
- Charity? Yeah.
I'm on the committee to reopen Westlake Orphanage.
Deputy Hanson, you can be a part of helping to find homes for dozens of children in need.
Single boxes are $6 apiece.
And I feel obliged to strongly recommend the peanut clusters.
They are good.
Well, I'm kind of trying to lay off the sweets right now.
Understood, Deputy.
If it's all right, I'll just take a look and see who else is around.
There's nobody up that corridor.
Um, what if I came back tomorrow night? Well, it's usually pretty empty at night.
Well, thanks for your help, Deputy.
What are you doing here? - I'm selling candies for charity.
- Not in here, you're not.
Yes, sir.
[Isabel.]
Are you insane? [Isabel.]
Are you insane? I didn't just wander in, all right? I had a cover story.
- And what was your cover story? - I was selling candies for charity.
Peanut cluster? - And they bought it? - No, they all seemed to be on a diet.
Not the candy, Einstein.
The story.
Yeah, they bought the story.
Why are you wearing that? Because, Michael, I have a date with a guy that I like.
In fact, I like my whole life here.
In fact, I have a date next Friday that I'm hoping I won't have to miss because I'm running from the law.
You two, the point is this.
That file has got to be in Valenti's office.
All right, he leaves for the day at 7:30.
There's no one else in the entire wing of the sheriff s station.
We go in, we find the file we get the info, we put the file back So how do we break in, hypothetically? The window.
It's got a lock on it.
It's nothing you can't handle.
Alarm system? Hypothetically.
Piece of cake.
Even I could deactivate it.
Max, don't humor him, okay? I can't believe you're even considering this.
I just wanna know how feasible the plan is.
Which it's not feasible.
- It's not feasible, Michael.
- This is what we've been waiting for our entire lives.
I mean, this is the first time we've ever had any clue that might tell us who we are.
- We don't have a choice.
- [Philip.]
Hey.
! [Diane.]
Anybody here? And with government agents after us, we oughta get our asses in gear.
- Agents? - What are you talking about? - Talk to Liz.
- [Philip.]
Anybody hungry? - Hey, guys, we got pizza.
Hi, honey.
- Hey.
You look pretty.
Michael.
Hi.
Hey, I was just leaving.
- We got plenty of pizza.
- My dad's cooking.
- Thanks, though.
- Well, I'm starved.
Come on, guys.
Plates, napkins.
Let's eat.
So we know that the sum of "A," "B," and "C" equals 360 degrees.
- [Whispering.]
What's she talking about? - Miss Parker? I'm sorry? It's a triangle.
You know, the sum of the parts would be 180 degrees.
[Chuckling.]
Right.
Right, of course.
Equals 180 degrees.
- But she pulled other students' records? - Well, yeah.
But the point is is she pulled Michael's.
- Well, how many others were there? - I don't know.
- Maybe 10.
- Well, 10's a lot.
Okay, it might have only been five.
I'm not sure how many there were.
You can't just show up at Michael's and get him riled up like that.
You don't know him.
He's not big into "Let's go over our options.
" He acts on things.
Look, I'm sorry.
I just thought that Michael was in danger and that I'd better tell him.
In danger of what? I don't know.
I have no idea.
Look, I am just saying that if there is a spy among us don't you think it behooves us to do something about it? - Spy? - Well, yeah.
- Liz, listen - No, Max, that sort of thing exists, doesn't it? There's, like, special branches of the government.
Alien hunters, you know, that sort of thing.
So you think Miss Topolsky is an alien hunter? When you say it like that, it sounds ridiculous.
Liz thank you, you know, for looking out for us.
But we have to go on with life as it was before this happened.
And we have to be careful now.
All of us.
You too.
[Maria.]
The eraser room? Huh.
Liz, do you know what the second floor eraser room means? Of course I know what it means.
What does it mean? It's where Greg Coleman gave Marlene Garcia that hickey the size of a softball.
It's where Richie Ruehl and Amanda Lourdes consummated everything.
Okay, Maria, you know what? You're just making this into something that it's not.
Liz, I don't think you should do this, okay? I mean, we don't know what can happen.
I mean the guy touched you, and you saw into his soul.
How do we know what happens if he kisses you? How do we know what it is to be kissed by a Czechoslovakian? You don't.
Okay, Maria, no one is kissing anyone here.
I mean, Max isn't even the least bit interested in me.
He said that things were just like they used to be before.
Nothing's changed.
He said that.
Oh, my God.
It's not just kissing that goes on in the eraser room, Liz.
She's got that right.
All right, the eraser room does two things cleans erasers and takes our innocence.
Do you know what I mean by "takes our innocence," Liz? The eraser room has taken some of the best of us.
[Knock At Door.]
- Afternoon, Sheriff.
- Agent Stevens.
What, you don't write, you don't call.
L-I'm sorry about kicking Junior out of here the other day but he had no jurisdiction.
- No offense.
- None taken.
So what'd you guys find on that waitress uniform? Well, several things actually, Sheriff.
Tomatoes, salt, water, sugar, vinegar.
Ketchup, Sheriff.
No blood.
We've wasted enough taxpayer dollars on trying to find something that isn't out there.
No spaceship landed here in 1947.
No aliens are currently residing in Roswell, New Mexico.
I've been given the authority by the governor to search the premises and remove any information pertaining to U.
F.
O.
S alien sightings, and other alleged paranormal occurrences in this county.
This thing is over, Sheriff.
Let's get on with it, guys.
You found blood on the dress.
I mean, why else would you care enough to remove my files? Wouldn't that be a waste of taxpayer dollars? It's locked.
This won't take long.
Thank you, Sheriff.
Make yourselves at home.
I'm goin' to lunch.
So, um, this is the eraser room.
I've never been here before.
I just thought we should be somewhere private.
Right.
You were right about Topolsky.
She isn't who she appears to be.
Oh.
She's been using this office so I thought we should find out why she's here.
Yeah.
She has off sixth and seventh periods, so we might be here a while.
[Car Alarm Chirps.]
Okay, I'm still confused.
If you crash-landed in 1947, are you really 16 or are you, like, Or do you guys just age differently? I mean, is, like, one alien year equal to three human years? You've thought about this a lot, haven't you? Kind of.
Well, we know we came out of the pods in 1989.
We just don't know how long we were there.
When we came out, we looked like six year olds.
So were you, like, green? - Green? - Before you took human form were you three feet tall and green and slimy? You know, I'm very sorry about asking you that.
It's Maria's question.
Um, no.
We just always looked like this.
Except for the, uh, third eye.
Right.
Kidding.
Yeah.
I knew you were kidding.
You're such a jerk.
[Cart Approaching.]
So you really have no idea where you're from like, what planet, or who your people are besides Michael and Isabel? No idea.
Well, that must be kind of freeing in a way.
Freeing? Um, well, just with me.
You know, my parents own the Crashdown so everyone in town knows who I am.
If I so much as get a haircut everyone seems to notice and they have to give me their opinion on it.
It kind of makes life claustrophobic.
It's like, you know, how am I ever supposed to become whoever it is that I'm gonna become while everyone's looking? You know? Sometimes I wish I could just be invisible.
Sometimes I wish I didn't have to be so invisible.
[Door Opens.]
[Topolsky.]
Okay.
I've looked through all of them, and this is where I wanna get started.
Michael Guerin.
Have you interviewed him yet? [Topolsky.]
He hasn't set foot in school since I've been here.
But if Muhammad doesn't come to the mountain - You want me to go talk to him? - No, I'll do it.
Just check and make sure the address is correct.
You got it.
[Door Opens, Closes.]
- Five minutes.
- Right.
- Something's up.
- They're taking things out of the sheriff s office.
- What? - Some guy in a suit, so we gotta get in there.
It's now or never, Max.
You know, I'd steer you to this side of the menu.
Oh, excuse me.
Where have you been? - I need you to cover for me.
- When? - Tonight.
- Oh, no.
It's a zoo.
Excuse me? I've been waiting for my Hot Fudge Blastoff - for, like, 20 minutes.
- Yeah, like he needs 80 grams of fat.
Okay, so one trip to the eraser room, and you're, like, above working? Go get your uniform on, Madonna.
The masses are demanding alien-themed greasy food and, by God, it is our job to serve it to them.
Look, Maria, this is really important.
I promise I will tell you everything later.
You're the best, but right now I've gotta go.
Okay, I want some answers, all right? 'Cause first of all there are rumors going around that last week you were shot here in the cafe.
And then at the Crash Festival, you were seemingly run over by a car, but then you weren't.
And every time I walk up to you two, you go silent or you make up some ridiculous story about Czechoslovakia which is a country that has not existed for 10 years.
So I want the truth, and I want it now.
Alex, the reason that we keep on changing the subject - is - Cramps.
- We have cramps, Alex.
- Yeah.
And we didn't even want to talk about it in front of you because we thought that it would just make you feel really uncomfortable.
- But if you really want to know, we can tell you.
- In really excruciating detail.
No! I'm eating.
Thank you.
- It's important to me too.
- All you wanna do is protect what you got here in Roswell.
- That's right, I do.
- Did you ever think about what it's like here for me, Max? Of course I have.
Look, the woman who pulled your records, she's on the way to your place.
- What? - Just stay away from there tonight.
Isabel is waiting for you at our house.
- Just go there and wait.
- Wait for her to come find me? Don't do anything stupid.
Let's go.
- [Engine Starts.]
- Liz? So how did you end up where you ended up and, um, Michael ended up here? It's a long story.
Is his foster father always, uh, so Tough? Yeah.
- [Object Clatters.]
- My ring! Oh, my God! Liz, get get up.
Liz Sorry to bother you.
I'm looking for Michael.
- Liz! - Kyle! - Hey, Max.
What's goin' on? - Hey, Kyle.
- [Whispering.]
Nothing.
- Why are you whispering? We're just, uh, waiting for Michael.
- We're gonna go, um - Bowl.
- Why are you whispering? - We're going bowling.
- Liz, what were you doing down there? - I dropped my ring.
- Why are you whispering? - I'm gonna give you my number.
- Mm-hmm.
- And could you have Michael call me? - Bowling? - Yes.
- What? What? - Max.
[Kyle.]
What are you doing? Maybe when this all blows over you and I could get lunch or something.
- Lunch? - Yeah, if you want.
So, like, in the caf? - Sure.
- Okay, great.
It's a date.
No! It's not a date.
It's a lunch.
Lunch.
Right.
I better get home.
Yeah, yeah, me too.
Good night, Liz.
Good night.
#[Rock Ballad.]
#[Ends.]
Michael's AWOL.
You know the guy doesn't know how to control his powers.
I know.
Okay, you get Michael out of there.
I'll keep Valenti out of his office as long as I can.
- [Car Door Closes.]
- Right.
- Forget somethin'? - Papers.
Sheriff? I'm so glad someone's here.
I have a flat tire and I am so not mechanical.
Sheriff? You're off duty, Sheriff.
I'd be happy to help the young lady out.
It's okay, Deputy.
I got it.
Michael, let's go, now.
Valenti's back.
Let's go.
! Michael.
! Wait here.
Let's go.
Let's go.
One, two three.
Told you it was no big deal.
There you go.
You're all set, Miss Evans.
Thanks.
Thanks a lot.
- Isabel, right? - Yeah.
- [Starts Engine.]
- You're out past curfew.
Well, I had a flat tire.
Right.
Where's Max tonight? Oh, I have no idea.
I'm just his sister, not his keeper.
Thanks again.
Nothing.
- [Gasps.]
- What'd you see? Ricky Martin in the shower.
Hey.
Sorry about before.
Maybe I don't really know what it's like for you.
The thing I've realized is The fact that my life basically sucks is a good thing.
It's easier.
We always have to be able to leave, pack a suitcase, go somewhere else.
Maybe 10 years from now, maybe a week from now.
Maybe tomorrow.
So my advice: Don't get in too deep, Maximilian.
It only makes us weaker.
Miss Parker? I have some questions for you about Michael Guerin.
Your friend Michael is in serious trouble.
I'm not a substitute teacher.
I saw you at Michael's house last night.
- I'm the new guidance counselor.
- Guidance counselor.
And Michael is a boy who's in serious danger of being expelled from this school.
If you're really a friend, you'll talk to him and you'll have him come in and meet with me soon.
Are you with me, Miss Parker? - I'll tell him.
- Thank you.
[Liz Narrating.]
Since I found out about Max and Michael and Isabel I've been thinking a lot about secrets.
That for everyone who has a secret there's someone else who needs to know what that secret is How sometimes secrets keep people from feeling like they belong.
And sometimes, secrets make you feel like you do belong.
And now, even I, Liz Parker the smallest of small-town girls with the simplest oflives even I have something to hide.