Salish & Jordan Matter (2026) s01e02 Episode Script

This is our dog Boomer.
And today, my daughter and I are competing
to build him
the most awesome doghouse ever.
Salish has been hiding something all day,
but I'm about to find out what.
Whoa! No, actually, no!
We each get a budget of $1,000.
- Ooh!
- We have eight hours to finish.
Then Boomer will pick
his favorite doghouse.
- The winner gets the Matter Cup.
- [cheering]
I didn't think you could do
anything more embarrassing.
[laughing] If you're Top Matter,
you don't have to do dishes
until the next competition.
- I call the backyard.
- I'll get wood. Wanna come?
- I'm okay.
- What do you mean?
We're going to Home Depot.
Three years ago,
we found Boomer at a shelter.
Ever since then,
he has been Salish's very best friend.
[loudly smooching]
I have a big secret.
I cannot build a doghouse by myself.
- So… Hi!
- Hey, how are you?
This is Matthew Beem,
and he's built a doghouse before.
So could you help me
build one for our dog?
I can. I brought some friends.
- Come on in, guys.
- Oh, okay.
We've got one person. Oh, two.
- Three.
- There's a lot more.
It keeps going. Four. Five. Okay!
We got five extra helpers. Perfect.
This is a big secret.
I'm competing against my dad.
He has no idea.
- This is the dog's current bed?
- It is.
To beat your dad, we need bigger.
- Where is he?
- He's out for hours. He has no idea.
I gotta call Say.
She's probably using
a cardboard box and scissors.
- She should've come.
- [line ringing]
What could she possibly be doing?
- I have this.
- Okay.
You're gonna need that.
- Watch out.
- A vest? [chuckling] Oh, hello.
- You ready for this?
- So ready.
What's the plan?
This is what I'm gonna win
if I win the doghouse competition.
Seems cringey,
but I also don't have to do dishes
for a week.
We have to win. Plan?
I want two floors, a roof deck, pool,
a sunroof, kitchen, bathroom,
bedroom, and living room.
I have eight hours
until I have to be done.
- He can't see you here, okay?
- Okay.
I'm gonna check Find Friends
to see where he is.
He's just getting to Home Depot.
He has no idea
how to deal with Home Depot or anything.
So much to do.
We have to get paint, wood,
and building supplies.
I'm calling my father-in-law.
I'm competing to see
who can build the best doghouse.
I've sawed things and nailed things,
but I've never built from scratch.
Where to start?
Go on the Internet
and look for plans for doghouse.
That's actually really smart.
Old dogs do know tricks.
- Wanna help me beat your granddaughter?
- I'm Team Salish.
Everybody's gonna be Team Salish.
I can't believe he'll build that.
He's never built anything.
"Fourteen free DIY doghouse plans
anyone can build."
Boom! This is the Top Matter.
You're looking at him.
Salish, you're going down.
The pool is definitely
the most important part.
When I built my doghouse,
we did a bone shape.
I think we should do a heart
'cause I love Boomer so much.
Do I need a ladder? Who builds a doghouse
tall enough to need a ladder?
We'll have two floors.
We should make it look like this house
so it matches.
This is gonna be the craziest.
I'm extremely stressed
since you only have eight hours.
- This is not gonna work.
- Not good, I guess.
- Is this like…
- [whirring]
Oh! Wow, that's on?
Once he's home, I have a couple ideas
to make him stop stealing our ideas.
- Like?
- You'll see!
I'm stressed I'm not gonna finish this.
Where's the wood?
Dimensional lumber's here.
Plywood's over here.
Thank you. Awkward. It's here.
This is overwhelming. Where do I start?
I am Team Salish.
I'm sorry, Jordan,
but we're gonna take this.
This is the first board
of our entire doghouse.
Three, two, one.
- [chuckling]
- Whoa! That worked!
- I hope everything goes that easy today.
- Yeah.
[excitedly] I'm gonna make you
the best doghouse that has ever happened.
I'm gonna be Top Matter, okay?
- I need to build a doghouse.
- Frame of two-by-fours.
- The exterior out of plywood.
- Thank you.
[excitedly] Come on, yes! I'm gonna win!
Salish is all by herself.
Salish is building hers
out of a cardboard box.
- Next…
- [hammering]
Next, we're gonna put the…
Next we're gonna…
We gotta do the floor now.
Boomer sleeps with Salish.
Her room is all pink.
So if I make the doghouse pink,
he is gonna automatically be drawn to that
'cause it reminds him of Salish.
Um…
Where is pink?
It's time to paint this like our house.
- Perfect.
- Pink!
Which is Barbie pink?
There's a lot that goes into this.
Which color is Salish's room?
Oh, that one?
Thinking of Salish
trying to make a doghouse…
I'm lost, but at least I'm in Home Depot.
She's what? Got a cardboard box?
[upbeat rock music]
We have these people. Is this cheating?
- He never said I couldn't get help.
- Fair enough.
Draw the heart to show you love your dog.
We'll turn this into the pool.
Now I know everything I need to build,
I'm gonna have my assistant buy it
while I move to the next location.
Thanks, buddy.
I'm gonna do… What am I doing?
This is his location.
Let me see.
- [slamming]
- Oh!
- It'll be fine. Where's he?
- There.
We're in the pet store. It's time
for Boomer to pick what goes inside.
I want you to have your favorite toy.
Tennis balls?
Ooh!
Nope. Are you asking for a pet guinea pig
in your doghouse?
- [scratching]
- [sniffing]
I wanna get him for Boomer.
[chuckling] That might be a bad idea.
Salish's doghouse is gonna be tiny,
so mine's gonna be bigger.
We need to start the rest of the roof.
Like a hammer. Bop!
[hammering]
Perfect!
The doghouse will have
one piece of furniture.
I gotta make it right.
Here's a bunch of dog beds.
We'll have him see what he likes.
I'm not messing around.
Boom. Boom.
He's gotta pick one of these, right?
This might be it.
Match the decor of the rest.
This is the first.
We need three more in each corner.
Let's do it.
[upbeat jazz music]
Nope.
Oh!
That'd be a no.
- This is hard.
- This is awesome!
It looks so big.
Boomer is gonna love it.
It's gonna be the pool there.
- Strength test.
- Ready?
Okay.
[screaming]
- Half of it's still standing.
- No!
- Do we have to start over?
- Yeah.
This is really comfortable.
He likes this one.
[chuckling] Yeah. Okay, this is his bed.
Yes! I've also got this.
I'm gonna show you later.
- How long till your dad gets home?
- I don't know!
We can fix it.
The builders keep building
while me and Salish go
and get interior stuff
so this house stands out.
[sighing] I hope we finish. We'll try.
I'm building a doghouse for my dog.
My daughter's building one.
One of us is gonna win.
- Team Jordan.
- [excitedly] Yes!
I got another trick now.
- What if he's coming to Target?
- That would not be good.
Is he coming here or going home?
I don't know. We gotta hurry.
I want to get Boomer a bed,
some blankets, some toys,
some flowers, some plants, some dog bowls.
That's a lot.
- This's perfect.
- That's good.
- We got this.
- We really have to hurry.
Oh! What about this?
- It's his perfect size?
- That'll fit.
I want photos with Boomer,
so we're gonna need frames.
- Maybe decor like this candle.
- Okay.
I've got wood, paint.
It's time to find something to decorate,
make it special.
He's so tired.
[babbling]
It's funny we're shopping
in the home decor aisle.
- I like this.
- Yeah.
This one's kind of cute. Perfect.
These two look like they would be
at our house.
- What else?
- Dog toys.
Gotta get to dog toys.
- What's our budget?
- Like a thousand dollars?
How much was the wood?
Don't worry. I had it left over.
- It's yours free.
- Thank you.
- I wonder if your dad's as stressed.
- Hopefully.
All I need to do is add Christmas lights
and make the doghouse perfect. Mwah!
Say, how's your cardboard box?
This is the most stressful build,
but we're gonna win.
- I am freaking out.
- Look.
- Dog toys!
- This one's cute.
- This.
- Should we get this?
That looks too big. Maybe this one?
Let's get it.
[gasping] This would be perfect.
- Matthew.
- Yeah?
It says my dad is at Target right now.
- This Target?
- Yeah.
[tense music]
Your dad could be in any aisle.
We need to leave.
Let's check out. Hide under the cart.
- If he sees…
- [whispering] He's there!
- Shoot.
- You're not low enough. Get lower.
We have to stay out of the main entrance.
That's risky.
- Why would he be coming here?
- I don't know.
Stay low.
I gotta find battery-powered ones.
I'm running out of time.
I gotta build a doghouse.
Battery-powered string lights.
We need to get out.
- He's right there.
- Go!
Get in!
Okay, um…
I just realized
these things make us stand out.
Yeah.
He's right there!
Oh, he's right there. We got to go.
Go.
- That was really close.
- I think we're good.
- One more thing.
- He's right there.
He's right there.
Go.
- This was an awful idea.
- This was a terrible idea.
Should we buy this stuff?
We need to buy this, or else we're not--
There he is. Come back!
Go!
Get down. Okay.
This is terrifying. Oh!
- Do not let him see us.
- I'm trying.
[tense music]
- I don't see him.
- Okay. Can I get out?
- Yeah.
- He's right there.
He's checking out right now.
Don't look backwards.
I'll go over here.
I feel so suspicious.
- Let's go. Come on, open faster. Okay.
- [squealing]
We need to get to your house
and finish this.
Since your dad's already done,
he's gonna be home sooner.
Definitely.
This looks so good!
Oh my gosh.
Ouch.
- I'll help you.
- All right.
This is looking great.
This is nicer than the floor in my house!
There's gonna be two floors,
so the dog can go down or upstairs.
We're gonna take her exact drawing
and cut it out
so it's the perfect shape.
- Is your dad's gonna have a pool?
- No.
- I like our chances.
- I'm gonna get him a treat.
Also, trying to bribe him.
- Thank you.
- Of course.
Oh, are you so excited?
Yeah!
I'm not doing this to bribe you.
When you're picking,
remember who got you a puppuccino.
What do we think Salish is doing?
You think she's gotten started?
Sandy, cue a graphic of the things
I think Salish has been doing today.
None of them involve a doghouse.
- Where's your dad?
- Leaving Starbucks.
He could be coming home
or going somewhere else.
- You better leave.
- I should get out.
Wait. But what will I do?
- Good luck!
- Matthew!
I gotta get out of here.
I'm leaving her
with an amazing build team.
Good luck, Salish.
Team Salish!
I don't know how to finish this,
but I know how to keep my dad
from seeing it.
I have a really good idea
of putting this and this up on the windows
so he can't see anything.
You think he's gonna be able
to get through the house.
I've got a plan for that.
I am not losing to my dad,
and I do not want him to steal my design.
My dad is gonna be building
his doghouse there.
I need to make him a trap
so he can't get over there from here.
This is my first try
for a trap for my dad.
I hear you laughing. Let's see.
I wanna see!
Okay. This tape did not work.
I've got a better idea.
This thingy is a tripping wire.
I'm gonna tape it right here.
A hook. Like that. I love ladders.
Feed it through.
I'm gonna tie bells in the wire.
He's gonna try and steal my ideas,
so I'm gonna hear the bells ring,
and I'm gonna come right away.
I don't want him to cheat.
Matthew helping me, it wasn't cheating.
I was being super smart.
This can go there
so he doesn't see the tape.
Okay, I'm gonna be my dad.
"Oh, I need to see Salish's ideas.
Coming."
- [ringing]
- See? Perfect!
We've got a trip wire
in the other hallway,
but we need something to stop him here.
Okay.
Whenever my dad tries
to come through here,
if I see him, then I'll spray him.
I'm so smart.
Perfect.
He's not getting by this.
All of this is gonna be AstroTurf.
This part is gonna be the pool.
It's gonna look cool.
Boomer, ready for the best doghouse ever?
Let's do this thing!
[struggling] Yeah, I'll be there.
Got my stuff ready.
Gonna check on Salish to see how…
What is that?
She's trying to hide her build
so I can't see--
Not so fast, buddy.
- Hey, Ike.
- How you doing?
Good. Excuse me, I need to…
- Wait, what?
- You can't see it.
Dude, I did this with you
a couple weeks ago.
We've been through a lot. Roll back a lot.
BACK IN 2019…
- We've been through a lot.
- Me and Salish, we go way back too.
[joyful music]
Is that a table saw?
No table saws.
Hey!
[struggling]
- I don't want to use these things.
- Don't make me use those.
- Yeah!
- Okay, Jordan?
He wins. Okay!
What's this thing? No way.
- Is Matthew Beem out there?
- Who?
- Are you kidding me? Is Matthew Beem…
- Back.
Ah! Okay. I respect that.
You do your job.
Strong guy. You stay there.
We're good. Matthew's here?
I'm gonna find him.
There's other ways to get to the yard.
I love Jordan, but I'm Team Salish.
She's Top Matter.
- Thanks, Ike.
- Yeah. I got your back.
She brought a bodyguard?
- She forgot that there's this…
- [bells ringing]
- What?
- Dad!
- What's this? Oh, no!
- What are you doing?
- Why are you here?
- What are you doing?
- I spent $1,000 differently.
- What's going on?
- Go!
- Okay!
- That was rude. Why does he get to see?
- Did you bring Matthew Beem?
- What are you talking about?
- What's this?
- Okay, fine!
- He was here! He's helping you!
You didn't say that was not allowed.
Sandy, roll the tape.
We each get a budget of $1,000.
We have eight hours.
- Okay, Dad, go!
- Oh, God!
- Leave.
- Okay, you're right!
Matthew's good, so is Frenchie Fries.
Hey, I'm in a pickle.
Can you come and help me build a doghouse?
Nah, I think I'm Team Salish on this one.
Oh!
I hear table saws.
I know something's going on back there.
I can climb over these. It's no…
Whoa! No! Actually, no!
No! Stop!
Nevermind! Not the hair!
- That was nice and easy.
- Didn't see that coming.
Matthew's gone, but there's work to do,
so I'm gonna sandpaper this heart down.
This is the pool.
Got my wood, got my tools.
Because Salish got help, I got help too!
- [crickets chirping]
- They're excited. I have a secret plan.
The ultimate test to see
if Boomer will love this doghouse.
I cannot get over
that Salish got a bunch of help.
Matthew, my friend, helped her.
I can't believe that.
We gotta make a doghouse! Yeah!
[machines whirring]
We really have to hurry
because my dad's gonna be done any minute.
I'm stressed.
I thought I had this in the bag
just by building one,
and now she's got a production out there.
- [whirring]
- Ah-hah!
I mean, actually, wow!
I think my dad's doghouse will be
a small little house
with maybe a dog bed in it.
I am so happy this whole team
is helping me build this.
My dad will not be able to do that.
- Hi, honey, look!
- Wow.
- It looks good.
- It looks great. This is a first.
- Did you see Salish's?
- Oh, yeah. Totally.
[laughing] That's cute.
- Is it bigger than that?
- A little bit.
Oh, no. We gotta get to work.
We have got to win this cup.
[shouting] Oh, no! What?
WASTED
- Actually, no!
- We have to start over.
[angrily] Oh! You… Oh! God!
Oh! Ow! Oh, ow!
They're putting the walls on
and it looks like the front of our house,
and I think Boomer's gonna like it.
The hope is they don't finish,
or Boomer likes small doghouses.
- [whirring]
- When life gets you down, you keep going.
- You don't let it--
- Hey, Jordan!
- Jordan!
- Oh!
[angrily] Are you kidding me?
- Hey, Ike.
- Hey.
- I've got hemp protein and amino acids!
- [chuckling] Aw!
I know you like that.
All you gotta do is grab your amino acids.
Oh, yeah! Here we go!
Oh, God! Oh! Okay.
My bad!
Do you know you're gonna get a doghouse?
It's gonna be cool. You better pick ours.
You've seen how hard we've been working.
Boom, are you Team Salish or Team Jordan?
Sandy, add a sound effect.
I know you're Team Salish.
I'm gonna put a bunch of pictures
of Boomer and me,
but I wanna take one more
to remember this.
Right, Boomie? I love you.
[shouting] She is not beating me!
I am Top Matter!
[whirring]
Honestly, he's better at it than I am, so…
[whirring continues]
There's turf here,
and we're gonna build a fence around it,
so I'm gonna help by doing this.
[whirring]
One down, like a thousand more to go.
- This thing is fun!
- [whirring]
- Nevermind.
- Getting wood all over my body!
Ugh! What is that?
Yuck! Ew!
The last thing is put in the decorations.
I'm so excited.
We are constructing the doghouse.
I did this all alone.
Nobody here helped me.
Boomer loved this bed. How does it fit?
Perfect!
I'm gonna sneak in the back door.
This is the kitchen.
There's a microwave, phone.
Boomer is totally picking this doghouse.
Have fun with the dishes, Dad!
I'm jealous of Salish for thinking
of bringing Matthew and a crew.
I would've done it.
There's nothing in the rules
saying we couldn't.
I've never been able to stand
in a doghouse.
I cannot wait to show Boomer.
He's gonna go up here, and then around,
then up, then he's gonna be outside.
Okay, perfect.
That looks cute.
When you see this bed in a doghouse,
go straight to it, okay?
Then I won't have to do dishes.
Top Matter? [whispering] Yeah.
Boomer's rooting for me.
A nice couch.
This way I can sit in it too.
This is the photo I just took,
and it's gonna go there.
I don't want to show you
everything in the doghouse,
so I'm gonna do a final clean up
and then show you the finishing touches.
[humming]
Looking good, huh?
[whirring]
I'm feeling good about myself.
Almost done. Running out of time.
There's just a bit of a gap here.
I'm gonna beat my dad and win this trophy.
Perfect. I'm the Top Matter.
Now painting.
This is the color of paint
in Salish's room.
Since Boomer sleeps with Salish,
he's gonna be drawn to it.
I really wanna be Top Matter.
There's nothing about dishes I like.
I want that trophy.
Remember I told you
I have a plan for this?
Boomer likes Salish better. Might as well
take advantage. Putting this in.
Everybody did such a good job
helping me with this house.
Matthew, thank you so much for your help.
Finished. Ran out of paint.
Don't judge. It's my first time.
Now I've got a special surprise.
[upbeat country music]
Lots of cute puppies.
My theory is, if they like the doghouse,
so will Boomer.
Let's see what happens.
Nobody's going in.
[sighing] If they don't like it,
Boomer won't like it?
There's a doghouse. Fun doghouse.
Somebody go in the doghouse.
- Little guy, you wanna go in?
- [crickets chirping]
No. Okay.
You wanna wrestle in the doghouse?
This is not a good sign. I might lose.
There's ten dogs. Not one is going in.
They like the garden.
Nobody likes the house. Not a good sign.
[excitedly] Look!
Oh! Oh! They're in. Yes!
They went in.
Maybe Boomer will like the doghouse. Yes!
Gotta get my doghouse into position.
Okay.
Nope, no way. Rohan! A little help!
I finished. Can I go in now?
Let me hear you bark one time.
[mimicking barking]
- Let me see the doghouse!
- All right.
Okay. [sighing] Okay.
[dramatic music]
- How did she…
- I had some help.
Yeah, you think? Look at all these people!
Team Salish!
But Boomer might not even care
for big doghouses.
He might like a little one,
with his personal bed.
Are we ready to see who wins
the first ever Matter Cup?
Whoever wins avoids dishes
for an entire week.
- Ready?
- Yeah.
Whichever doghouse Boomer goes into
and settles down in,
that's the winning doghouse.
Let's see where he goes.
Come on. Like small doghouses.
- [Salish gasps]
- Ooh!
- [Jordan] No!
- [Salish] Yay!
- No!
- [Salish] Oh. Oh? [gasping]
- [Salish] Oh.
- No.
[Jordan] How are we gonna know
he settles down?
Actually, I can watch him on this monitor.
- She has a monitor?
- Yes.
[chuckling] When? A monitor?
Yes, just watch it.
- [Salish] Oh.
- [Jordan] He's not settling down at all.
- Why…
- I don't know.
- Did you ever think it might be too big?
- No.
- [Jordan] That is nice in there. It's nice
- [Salish] That's actually really nice.
Guys, that's really nice.
- Beautiful.
- They did a great job.
- Did you do anything?
- Yes, of course.
I screwed in some nails.
[Jordan] He's coming…
He's coming back out!
He did not lay down.
- [Jordan] Wait.
- [Salish] Yay!
- He's coming.
- [Salish] He's not.
- [Jordan] He is.
- No!
There he is. Okay.
He's going to mine.
Going to mine. Okay.
- No, he's not.
- He's going right in it.
He's going in my room!
Yes! No! I forgot to add
the Christmas lights!
- He might lay down.
- No, don't.
[Jordan] The whole point
is he'll lay in it.
- Don't.
- Do it!
No!
- [Jordan] Lay!
- No!
- It's your bed! Get in your bed.
- He's going out.
[Salish excitedly] Yes!
[nervously gulping]
[dramatic music]
[Jordan] No. Okay.
[Jordan] He's going upstairs.
He doesn't look like he's settling down.
Are you kidding? There's a roof deck?
Go back downstairs, Boomer.
- [Salish] Yes! Yes…
- [Jordan grunting]
- Go, Boomer, go.
- No.
[Jordan] Don't sit down. Don't. Just…
- [Salish gasping]
- No.
- [Jordan] Don't lay down.
- Okay, yes. Lay down.
- Don't lay down. No!
- Yes!
- [cheering]
- No!
- What?
- No dishes!
[Salish cheering] Yay!
I get this, and it is going
in the doghouse. Woo-hoo!
I guess dogs like big houses too.