Still Standing (2015) s01e02 Episode Script

1
You're the only town who's
mascot is a dead canary.
(Laughs)
♪
There's actually a
bear right there!
Holy Crap
♪
Well we're suffering
but we're gonna survive.
When you grow up in small
town in Newfoundland you see
that people have a sense of
humour about hard times.
Check, check.
I turned that into a
career and hit the road.
Mr. Johnny Harris
audience cheers
Now I'm on a mission to find
the funny in the places
you'd least expect it;
Canada's struggling small towns.
Towns that are against the
ropes but hanging in there,
still laughing in
the face of adversity.
Welcome to Coleman, Alberta.
It's a town as wild as the
west with a past as rocky
as the mountains and its
name tells the miner's story.
Coleman, nestled along the
border of Alberta and B.C.
I like how the
Alberta/British Columbia
border runs along the
continental divide.
The cartographers came
here up through the
foothills of the rocky
mountains, along the
continental divide until
they got here and one of
them was like this is
stupid, just go north,
this is stupid.
Almost a century later
Coleman's lost its
mine and other
businesses followed.
I'm Lisa.
- Lisa, nice to meet ya.
Nice to meet you too.
- Jonny.
Lisa Sygutek here
showed me around town.
I knew it was only a
matter of time before
I met a cougar in this town.
(Laughter and applause)
Lisa's family runs the
newspaper so she's been
digging the dirt on this
mining town for a while.
All these little tiny tiny
houses are all miner shacks.
Although it's bigger than
my apartment in Toronto.
She told me that Coleman
is a friendly town,
people don't generally
lock their doors here.
Although I should lock my
house because some person
snuck into my house and
stole all my underwear but
you know other than that
I get it. I get it.
Happened before I got
here for the record;
for the record.
There's Crow right there.
That's crow right there.
And the seven sisters.
It's like this unbelievable,
breathtaking, beautiful view.
Full of tragedy.
- Full of tragedy. -mhm
There is a history of
disaster in this town
that is remarkable.
So we are going to turn
left at that big sign.
That says Frank Slide -ok
I had no idea.
I was looking forward to
having a go on the
Frank Slide, it sounded fun.
So this is the Frank
Slide, this is what is
known as Turtle mountain
and it is the largest rock
slide in Canada, 90
million tonnes of rock
came off that mountain in
the middle of the night
and buried an entire town.
Approximately 90 people
died and it happened
in a matter of seconds.
It's unbelievable.
What I find amazing is
people's attitude towards it.
You guys don't hide it away,
it's out there, you embrace it.
You have to embrace the
tragedy because it's what
made us the strong
people we are.
So we may be poor we may not
have a lot of industry,
we may not have a lot of things,
but no matter what's
happened to us, we've pulled
together as a community
and we've made it happen.
That's the attitude
I'm getting at.
She was telling me all about how
everybody's getting
geared up for the
Hillcrest centennial
celebration.
This year is going to mark
the hundredth anniversary
of the Hillcrest mine
disaster which is
Canada's worst mine disaster.
The Hillcrest mining
disaster was responsible
for 400 fatherless children;
that's more than Charlie Sheen.
(Laughter)
Now I'm starting to
fear for my life.
Well they have called it
disaster alley and I think
when you grow up here
you have this sense that
what's the next thing
that is going to happen?
Then I thought to myself
Coleman, Alberta
it's got to be tough to get
life insurance here.
(Laugher)
But I was in the mine with
Ron Hrudy and Crystal here,
she's the executive
director of the tours there.
This is our mine portal
and we're going to go
about a thousand feet
underground today 300 meters.
This piece of timber,
it's been here so long
it's actually petrified.
Which means it didn't
get scared,
it just turned from wood
to stone over time.
Yeah I get it, everything
in here is petrified.
These days this mine
is only open for tours.
Miners like Ron have to
go across the border
to B.C to work now.
Ron himself is a
third generation
underground tough guy.
What do we got here Ron?
Okay that's called an air pick.
You couldn't use dynamite,
you'd have to dig all
that out with this here.
That's got some weight to it.
Yeah they'd use two of
them, one in each arm.
One of these in each hand?
No.
- Yeah, yeah.
Like I can't even
and I'm strong,
like really strong like.
Imagine how strong
them guys were.
Ron Hruby's a perfect
example of this attitude
I'm trying to get at.
Ron he's witnessed death
in the mines first hand.
Yet he can still go down there.
He can take me down there.
Teach me about the place.
I got hurt underground in
1981 in the mine from
a high water pressure
explosion that broke my back,
broke my right leg,
cut off my left arm and
they sewed it back on it,
lucky I've got full use of it.
Jesus. Did you keep
working in the mine?
Oh after I healed up a
come back to the mine.
You know such a dangerous
profession and between
here and Hillcrest and
the Frank Slide there's a
different sort of attitude
towards life with people
who are you know facing
the possibility of peril.
You live for the moment
in those days.
It's a history of danger,
there's so much danger;
the shootings during the
prohibition days or the
probability of a bear
attack or the numerous
mining disasters and
always referenced with a
smile and a sense of pride
and here you are now
out at the comedy show.
(Laughter)
Just happy to be alive I guess.
(Laughter & Applause)
I feel excited and afraid
in this town.
I wasn't sure if a town
like Coleman
flames out or simply fades away
Alright Jonny.
Do you want to carry
the kid for a bit?
The kid's getting heavy.
I can't believe you did such a
crap job of tying my tie.
Of course around here
the future has a way of
creeping up on you.
Crap hold on.
Hey you guys!
There's actually a
bear right there.
Go to the road.
Guys go to the road!
Holy crap.
It's getting tougher for
boom and bust spots like
Coleman to bounce back.
The mine closed and they
were forced to join other
towns to become the
Crow's Nest Pass region.
And Buddy Slapak says
there's been nearly a
century of turf wars
between these towns.
When I was a kid for
example I wouldn't dare go
to Bellevue without a gang,
you wouldn't survive,
they had one in Bellevue
called the night riders.
The night riders.
The night riders, riding
horses, some with capes on.
On horses with capes?
Yeah and they'd go around
beating up other
kids from other towns.
But they couldn't do
that underground because
everybody's life depended
on cooperating
with everybody else.
But once the men went
underground all that
animosity went away.
This is the guy who's
going to help you make it
through the end of your
shift, til you get back up
to see the light of day
and then and only then you
cold cock him with
your lunch pail.
(Laughter)
Buddy is 82 years old, he's
still a sharp as a tack.
Lisa told me that you're
the oldest editor in Canada.
She thinks so but I don't
know it's hard to say.
I believe it.
But when Buddy started out
in journalism,
everything he reported people
believed it like it was
written in stone, because it was
actually written in stone.
(Laughter)
He's got some great stories,
he's had a wild run,
he's had some crazy jobs.
I used to drive for the brothel.
I did that for the girls
at the brothel down there.
Are you serious?
Yes I even worked for a
funeral home for five years.
How many morticians you
think learned to do
makeup from prostitutes?
(Laughter)
Thanks Buddy, Nana never
looked so trampish.
(Laughter)
But Buddy joined the paper
and the rest is history,
legal history.
I got sued three times.
You got sued three times?
And lost all of them,
good track record.
Are you serious?
That officially makes
suing Buddy the fourth
largest industry in Coleman.
(Laughter)
I branded him as a communist.
So he took you to court.
And I lost that case.
Buddy's kind of like Coleman
itself, he's lived hard.
Next time I wrote a story,
accused him you know
he acted like a bloody juvenile,
put it in the paper, he sued me.
He's boomed and busted before.
So what happened
with the last one?
We got sued by the
ratepayers, it costs us
twelve thousand dollars.
So I guess I'm paying
for lunch then?
Yeah you're paying for lunch.
Doing up dead bodies,
fighting communists and
driving hookers
around the mountains.
Buddy could be the world's
most interesting man.
(Laughter)
Well we're suffering but
we're going to survive.
And like Coleman I can't
see Buddy fading away now.
It would be like a
betrayal of the history
of that built him.
♪
Who else did I get
to oh, Joe Trotz.
I went up to Joe Trotz's place.
One of the few big events
still going in Coleman is
the annual pro rodeo, 32
years running started
by a guy named Joe Trotz.
I kid you not.
Joe here he's got a riding
academy, he clears roads,
does rope tricks,
started a rodeo.
Joe is Alberta's answer
to Batman right here.
(Laughter)
Except he's got a bigger
belt buckle,
he's got a bigger belt buckle.
These boys are practicing up,
they're doing some groundwork,
taking the steers out of
chutes here and waa.
He took him down
pretty quick there.
Yeah he did.
You wanna give this a try?
I was a bit nervous I
wasn't sure how I was
going to fit in but these guys
are like manly cowboy men.
Every now and then like
just for a laugh,
I'll go up like behind my cat
and I'll take him by the back
legs and I'll tip him and
his arse goes over and
then rest of him plops
down, it's something like
that but starting with the
head and slightly larger.
Animal yeah.
Yeah I figure I'm good for it.
You could probably come up
to the ranch here in the
next day or two and
get you practiced up.
Oh yeah?
Yeah, get some clothes on you,
you know get some cowboy boots.
Yeah I'll find
something to wear.
♪
Before I wrestle sorry
rastle a steer I got to
warm up with a guy who
trains people to steer
clear of all kinds of wildlife.
And I went out with John Clarke.
Had a hell of a
day with John here.
Due to cutbacks he's the
only wildlife officer
for a huge region.
This is a corridor.
You know it has grizzly
bears, black bears going
through all the time.
He's responsible for
keeping the bears away
cause the restraining
orders are not working.
Last week we had a
cougar near Coleman.
Oh yeah? A cougar?
And we had a wolf like he
was just passing through
but wow what an experience;
I got to see a wolf.
- Yeah yeah.
There's bobcats and cougars
and wolves and bears.
I guess in Coleman the
rule is kill or be killed.
(Laughter)
You know take your walkman
or iphone off enjoy
your surroundings right.
Oh crap, hold on, hey guys,
there's actually a
bear right there.
Holy shit -Guys!
Alright let's go, let's go.
Come on guys, go to the road.
Guys go up to the road.
- Holy crap.
You know the old question
does a bear shit in the woods?
I don't know but I know
if I see a bear,
I will shit in the woods.
(Laughter & Applause)
We got you.
It's a fake bear.
Are you even messing with me?
We'll go see the bear.
He went out in the woods,
set this thing up so
we would happen upon it.
(applause)
This guy owes me a
new pair of underwear.
Yeah I got some bear spray.
Then my animal preparedness
training began.
Once and a while they
do maul somebody.
But I remembered Lisa told
embrace the danger.
Holy cow! There's a bear,
okay go ahead spray him.
Ron told me, live
for the moment.
John taught me be
prepared for anything.
Never point it at your face.
fires flare gun Whoa!
You know we've got bears,
we've got avalanches,
we have trees falling on people.
I was really starting to get
the hang of this place.
Have escape routes okay.
See I do that for a
zombies but I should
probably apply that
to out in the wild.
But I think you should
come back in the fall when
all the bears are out
and walking around.
Ah I don't know, I don't know.
You would have fun.
Jonny laughs
The more dialed in to
Coleman I got
the more concerned I became
about it's survival.
♪
I was still a bit
intimidated by Coleman.
I mena, how did this fierce
but struggling rocky mountain
town survive through
the tough times before
and rise up from the
ashes again and again?
I went to meet one woman
who seemed to embody
the Coleman spirit.
Well who wouldn't say this is
the best place in the world.
It's beautiful.
- It is.
I got to have a lovely
chat with Kay Kerr,
the crown jewel of the
Crow's Nest Pass.
93 years old, making it
to 93 is remarkable,
making it to 93 in this
area is unbelievable.
(Laughter)
You worked with John
Diefenbaker is that right?
Hard worker, we had to be
at work at 8 o'clock
in those days.
I wouldn't accept that.
(laughs)
Not only did Kay survive
the depression,
she went on to become an
entrepreneur and inventor.
So tell me what your
connection to
Kentucky Fried Chicken is?
Well I had four franchises.
In this area?
- Mhm.
Kay's claim to fame was
she reinvented a way of
making gravy, the gravy
used to take a half hour
to make; she figured out
a way how she could
make the gravy in 2 minutes.
She went down to the states
and met Colonel Sanders.
And I was surprised that the
Colonel met me at the plane.
Is that right?
Yeah which was nice.
So when Colonel Sanders
tasted your gravy did he
have any recommendations
or was there anything.
Yes he did, more black pepper.
Black pepper?
They no longer use Kay's
gravy at the KFC today so
I thought she might
want to try it.
You know what?
I will have to say no.
Why? -Why?
Because this is not fair.
I am going to say it
isn't as good as mine.
That's fair, that's
absolutely fair.
No it isn't.
Such a sweet woman, she
kept talking about how
lovely the Colonel was,
what a nice man he was.
I kept thinking no you need
to sue him for more money
(Laughter)
and if you can't sue
him at least sue Buddy,
get a few bucks out of him.
(Laughter)
If anybody should take a
lesson out of it you know
when you see an
opportunity, go after it.
♪
Kay had inspired me.
My Coleman opportunity
had been staring me in the
face and now it was time
for me to face it
face to face.
Nice one boys, nice one.
I was starting to muster a
little country courage or
at least dress the part.
What do you think
Kyle, you wear that?
Them fringes might
get in your way though.
Truth is I know how I look
and I still feel kind of cool.
Okay and it gives
you confidence.
As long as you look good
that's all that counts,
that's my attitude.
Cowboys say you get the
animal you deserve and
I guess I deserve a -
whatever in god's name
this thing is.
This is shiver and shake.
Shiver and shake?
I got to say Joe I was
worried about a broken rib
and now I'm just worried
about carpet burn.
We're going to give ya
the quick version
of steer wrestling 101.
Yeah.
I soon found that deciding to
live dangerously was one thing;
learning how was
something else altogether.
This is different cause
you guys hold the reins
like this but all the
horse riding that
I've done I hold onto the waist
of the person in front of me.
It's pretty humbling when
you can't even tackle a
steer who's made out of
carpet and has ping pong
balls for eyes.
(Laughter)
But I guess I didn't
embrace the independence
of the wild west
until I talked to Joe.
You know we're luckier than
a lot of people you know
we have a whole wilderness
out in our back door.
Yeah we're still pretty free
here to do a lot of things;
you can jump on a quad, a horse,
a bike whatever and
just head out.
How long have you
had the ranch here?
The property here has been
in our family since 1912.
My grandfather moved up
here, he come originally
from Newfoundland, I don't
know what the heck
He wasn't the first
Newfoundlander
to come to Alberta.
No no maybe the second.
And then it hit me if
Joe's cowboys roots are
from the rock, I should
be able to do this or at
least look good trying.
Get in the hold, get in the
hole, yeah, yeah Jonny!
Woohoo!
Argh! Argh!
I started to get the hang
of it, the only advice
I can pass on is never try
to wrestle a steer with
keys still in your pocket.
(Laughter)
The only upside is if I
ever lose my house key,
I can get a spare cut
from the impression
in my right arse cheek.
(Laughter)
Wooo!
Felt pretty good but then
Joe reminded me
I wasn't quite a cowboy yet.
There they go.
There they go, one with
your name on it.
Oh my god.
Coleman, Alberta.
You guys know you're the
only town whose mascot
is a dead canary?
(Laughter)
There's this cool boom or
bust, make or break,
life or death wild west
attitude that people have.
I wasn't sure how I
was going to fit in.
Tell my mom I died
doing something stupid.
(laughs)
Tell us when you're ready.
Ready.
Go Jonny.
Go.
More or less, more or less
We had to tag team him
but you know got the job done.
And then I realized if
it ain't tough,
it ain't Coleman.
That's a bit of fun yeah.
Can get into it.
That's a bit of a rush.
Yeah it is eh, ha, yeah.
Yeah thanks Joe.
My final night in Coleman
half the town's out for a
big annual event, they
call it miner's curling.
Sweep it Jonny, sweep it.
I got turned around.
Line's good.
Coming in hot.
In miner's curling they
actually turn the lights off
and fire up the
miner's headlamps.
I got to turn my high
beams on, hang on.
Only somebody from Coleman
would look at the sport of
curling and be like well
yeah but we can't just curl.
Alright Jonny we're going
to need a little
juice out this side.
We should simulate
a disaster right.
Fireworks, there's got
to be fireworks.
Come on!
That's right, fireworks
in the friggin' arena and
then just like in a real
mine disaster,
they haul ass outa there for
roll call, it's crazy.
We're missing Jonny Harris sir.
Of course nobody
told me that part.
Coleman I have learned a
lot from you and now maybe
you guys can just sit back
and take a little piece
of advice from me, okay?
Curling is hard
enough with lights on.
(Laughter)
I thought it was my shot?
(Laughter & Applause)
You can't carve out a life
in the rocky mountains
unless you're ready
to embrace the hard.
There are big risks for
the bigger rewards and
what's written on
everyone's faces here,
it's worth it.
Before I came over to the
hall today for the first
time since I got here I
got a call from my mom,
she said Jonathan how's Coleman?
I said mom it's great,
I wrestled a steer,
got scared by a fake bear,
went in a mine and was
shown around town by a
cougar who may or may not
have been wearing underwear.
But I'm still alive and
that counts for something
in Coleman, Alberta.
Thanks so much everybody.
♪
Jonny can come work on
my miner crew any day.
To go out and meet all
them people and put it all
out and make a comedy out
of it, it was really good,
my hat's off, hell of a job.
You betcha.
Really enjoyable, come
back and see us again.
I loved it.
I thought it was great.
If he talks about my
underwear again I'm going
to come to Toronto and
kick him in the ass.
I'm not much of a laugher
but I was laughing
through the whole thing.
♪