Among Us (2026) s01e03 Episode Script

1
♪
♪
(shushes)
They can't know you're here.
LIME: Can't tell my messages
boards I got scanned.
They'll never forgive me.
I'll get banned
for inappropriate language.
Again.
- Gotcha!
- (Purple gasps)
LIME: I'm gonna get you.
I'm gonna get another one, too.
I'm gonna get all of you.
PURPLE:
Oh. Phew.
- (gasps)
- YELLOW: Okay, count of three,
favorite shoe insert.
One, two, three.
- Orthotics.
- BROWN: Orthotics.
YELLOW:
So true.
Favorite candle scent.
One, two, three.
- Papaya Sunrise.
- Papaya Sunrise.
YELLOW: But what about
favorite final seasoning flourish, eh?
One, two, three.
- Flakey Salt.
- BROWN: Au naturel.
YELLOW:
What? Nothing? Come on.
BROWN:
Blows out your palette.
(Purple panting)
Whoa!
(splash)
- RED: Ew, Purps.
- PURPLE: Oh, boy.
RED:
Why are you wallowing in blood?
GREEN:
Yeah. Why you wallowing, Purps?
PURPLE: You think I decided to
wallow by sitting in a puddle of blood?
- GREEN: Hmm, Purps's got a point, Redsie.
- (Purple sighs)
- ORANGE: Fun reminder.
- (Purple screams)
ORANGE:
MIRA assumes no liability
for any and all cartoonish
blood puddle slip-and-falls.
GREEN:
Bloodle policy's ironclad.
PURPLE: Isn't anybody
worried, I don't know,
why there's blood
outside of MedBay?
RED:
Wait, shut up.
Why is there blood
outside of MedBay?
PURPLE:
It's locked.
- RED: Captain to the rescue.
- PURPLE: Whoa!
- (crash)
- Damn it.
RED:
(grunts) Captain's kick.
(Purple groans)
RED: Wow, sucks that I'm
so ripped, huh? (Chuckles)
Hey, Blue, what's wrong
you dead in there or something?
(all gasp)
(Red gasps)
PURPLE:
Maybe we can see if Blue
is okay on the MedBay camera.
RED: Oh, you still collect
vintage binoculars, huh?
(exhales sharply)
Hot, hot, hot
PURPLE:
Hmm. Blue's in there, all right.
ORANGE:
But why aren't they responding?
GREEN: Yeah, and how
do we get in to find out?
- (Lime grunts) Damn, wrong turn.
- (all scream)
GREEN: Great Caesar's Worm Farm,
how do you fit in those vents?
LIME: Easy. Years
of scalding hot yoga
gave me squish bone syndrome.
(strains)
Keeps my bone limber.
GREEN: Note to self:
"get yoga syndrome."
LIME: Yes, sir, squeezing
through those hot metal tubes
is like the warm caress
of a perpetual adult childbirth.
RED:
Uh, Green, Captain's tip:
never ask Lime
anything ever again.
PURPLE: Lime, uh, can you
access MedBay using the vents?
(Lime scoffs)
Can a chemtrail do a backflip?
PURPLE: I'll take that as a yes,
which is profoundly kind of me.
ORANGE: But we all know Lime is,
uh, navigationally challenged.
RED: True, Purple's idea sucks.
New plan.
I'll guide Lime through
the vents into MedBay
using my impeccable
sense of direction.
And these blueprints.
Left. Left.
Another, uh
uh, what does this say?
I don't know,
I guess, uh, eight lefts.
LIME:
I'm blind as a bat down here,
which, I'll have you know,
they weren't always blind,
but made not to see.
CYAN: But in my next dream,
I was on a roller coaster,
which my ThetaHealer says
symbolically represents
BLACK: Childhood
fear of roller coasters?
CYAN:
Yes. See? Now you're getting it.
- (shouts)
- LIME: Gah. You ain't Blue.
CYAN:
I mean, I'm blue-curious.
RED:
Uh, which way is north in space?
- Uh
- (Purple grunts)
Try hanging three rights
where Red said
to take ten lefts.
(grunting)
(mutters)
♪
GREEN:
Hi, there.
- (Lime screams)
- (all screaming)
RED: One dead crewmate,
sure, that's an oopsie.
But two?
Makes me look like a bad leader.
And I can't let that happen.
ORANGE:
I'm afraid you already have.
RED: I'm a good captain.
I can't let MIRA down.
I'm good.
Green, mop up that bloodle.
Orange, gather the crew
so we can tactfully tell them
about Blue's possible
graphic death.
Purple, rewind the footage
so we can see
how or if Blue died.
- ORANGE: Aye aye.
- GREEN: Mm-hmm.
PURPLE: Yeah, so, again,
the cameras can't rewind
because they don't record.
RED: Well, why weren't you
watching? Isn't that your whole job?
PURPLE: Uh, I had to
call my cool cousin Josh.
Joshy.
RED: Make a call?
When comms are down?
PURPLE:
Well, I-I was practicing.
Practicing my-my call
to my cool cousin Joshy.
RED: Oh, come on.
I know you. Don't lie.
PURPLE: What? H-How could
you even assume I would
I-I mean, I-I'm not lying.
RED:
Eh, whatever you say, Purple.
Mm, okay.
Yep, definitely dead.
Even in death, Blue can make
being covered in pink goo work.
What a legacy.
LIME:
Where's the last body scan?
The doctor promised
to destroy mine!
RED: Uh, I know
part of your "process"
is being "eccentric,"
but you can't
just trash the place.
LIME: Weren't me.
Something sabotaged this joint
like a government-funded
tornado.
And that ain't
the whole parfait.
This scan's got no bone.
RED: Hmm. Whose
bone-less scan is this?
LIME:
No clue. Still missing one,
and Blue never got a chance
to label the lot of them
before buying a one-way ticket
to the devil's playground.
RED:
Hmm.
(mumbling)
No bone. Huh?
Huh.
No biggie.
One of the scans is missing
because Blue promised
to destroy yours, right?
And the bone thing?
Probably a glitch.
LIME: Bah. Glitches
are just big tech's way
of gaslighting your computer.
RED:
Uh, yeah. (Laughs)
Those words are all
in a sentence.
Now, time to tell the crew
there's another corpse on board.
♪
(alarm blares)
COMPUTER:
Emergency meeting.
Emergency meeting.
ORANGE:
Hi, team.
Here to circle back
and touch base with you all,
- the captain.
- (Red clears throat)
Crewmates.
A crew of mates.
Sounds so simple,
but is it really?
Nay.
Alas, I am tasked with sharing
the official cause of death
for a mate of crew.
Try to live as they might,
Blue officially died of
(clears throat)
acute ripping off of the face.
(all exclaiming, clamoring)
CYAN: Oh, that was the
most beautiful part about them.
Other than their brain,
body, shoulders,
emotional intelligence
and depth of self.
BLACK: Yeah, now I'm stuck
looking at you ugly losers.
No offense.
- PURPLE: No, you're right.
- (all agreeing)
CYAN:
I understand.
GREEN:
Who'll be the hot one now?
- RED: I will.
- BROWN: Yellow.
YELLOW:
Aw, thanks, Brown.
RED: No, me. I can
be the hot one now.
ORANGE: Fun reminder.
Nobody's the hot one.
We're all equally mediocre,
formless, non-sexual beings
- who are very, very ugly.
- ALL: AW.
PURPLE: Hate to steer
conversation to anything
I don't know
remotely important,
but shouldn't we be worried?
Isn't there a murderer among us?
RED: Uh, no way.
Two deaths? (Chuckles)
That's just a couple
run-of-the-mill accidents.
Now, three makes it
a murder mystery.
BLACK: Any one of
us could be the killer.
CYAN: Maybe the roller
coaster in my dream represents
murder?
YELLOW:
Quick, Brown one, two, three.
- Not a killer. Ah.
- BROWN: Not a killer. Ah.
ORANGE:
Purple, was it you?
Leading us to Blue
with your so-called slip?
RED: Hmm, "whoever
smelt it dealt it" rules.
- Interesting.
- PURPLE: What?
With that logic, it could be
Red or Green or Lime or you.
- We all found Blue's body together.
- GREEN: True.
And if you need me
to be the murderer,
I'll happily take the fall
to beef up my résumé.
ORANGE:
No.
Self-imposed
wrongful imprisonment
is against company policy.
Company-imposed wrongful
imprisonment only.
YELLOW: Any decision
about who the killer is
should be mutually agreed upon.
No truth, no pizza.
When the blood spills,
the marinara doesn't.
CYAN:
Stop with the bad vibes.
Solutions come
from good vibes only.
BLACK:
Yes, classic scientific method:
hypothesis, vibes, conclusion.
(all clamoring)
LIME: Why's nobody talking
about the no-bone scan?!
(Red laughing weakly)
- Oh, Lime, you batty ol' coot.
- LIME: I'm younger than you!
- RED: Wait, you are?
- LIME: I was born on a leap year.
I'm only six years old.
RED:
Ah, yes, of course you are.
Buddy, that so-called
no-bone scan?
It was just a glitch, remember?
Nothing nefarious.
(Lime chuckles) That's what
they want you to think.
It's a classic UFO cover-up.
GREEN:
Golly. The murderer's an alien?
ORANGE: Preposterous.
Aliens aren't real.
RED: Yeah, kid, don't goad
Lime. They're, uh Hmm.
What's the polite way
to say, uh
(mimics gurgling, babbling)
LIME: Bah. The only
(mimics babbling) I see is
the bravado of thinking
we're the only intelligent life
in this lonely infinity.
Now, lean in close
as I weave a tale
of possible truth.
RED: (scoffs) Yeah,
okay, let's cede the floor
to the most sane member
of our crew.
♪
LIME: The killer's an
alien and it likes to kill
and it looks like this.
DRAWING:
Hey, buddy.
- YELLOW: Oh, wow.
- ORANGE: Really?
BLACK: If this visor
was an eye, I would roll it.
LIME: You don't
believe I drew this?
BLACK: Oh, no, we
all believe that part.
ALL:
Mm-hmm.
GREEN;
Okay, maybe not an alien.
LIME: No! It's the perfect
shape to hide in bodies.
RED:
Enough! I'm the captain.
And I captain's promise you,
aliens aren't real.
And even if they are,
they don't like to kill.
LIME:
(grunts) None of you are safe!
I know the truth.
I know your secrets.
The vents whisper them to me.
Like your little secret
in Oxygen.
And your little book
that traps people's dreams.
CYAN:
Uh, you mean my dream journal?
PURPLE: Oh, c
c-clearly, Lime's lost it. See?
LIME:
You'll all be sorry.
When the aliens come for you
and crawl
their little stick bodies
inside you blobby bodies,
you'll all be sorry.
Chaos has found a new home!
BLACK: So, clearly, the lone
wolf who went off the deep end
is the killer, right?
CYAN: I don't know. Lime's
fear feels so traumatic.
So real.
YELLOW: So real because
Lime's afraid of us discovering
their filthy truth?
(scoffs) If I killed Blue,
I'd deny it, too.
RED: Hmm, of course,
whoever denied it supplied it
ORANGE: Lime is the only
one of us able to fit into the vents.
If they could enter
to open the MedBay doors
GREEN: (gasps) They
could have also snuck in
to kill Blue in the first place.
RED:
But, uh, either way,
I think we can all agree
it's a bummer to suspect
our weird, suspicious,
definitely-not-six-years-old
friend Lime.
But on the flip side,
nice to agree it's not an alien.
The more plausible
and comforting solution
is that it's a murderer.
Just a regular ol' murderer.
(chuckling) No biggie.
YELLOW: They've got guilt
written all over them.
(indistinct chatter)
PURPLE:
Hey, hey, you
what are doing over there?
Oh, uh, me?
(weak chuckle)
I'm just standing here.
(chuckles)
No biggie.
Keybot, Keybot, Keybot. Keybot.
Chirp.