House of Stassi (2026) s01e03 Episode Script

The Ungrateful Wench

1
[dramatic music]
- Yes, I am so generous.
- You have a lot of stuff.
- Well, I am moving here.
- And that offer
was also generous.
Oh, that's fantastic.
- Marriage is hard sometimes.
- I just feel like
a 1950s housewife.
And, like, you come over,
"Can I have a beer,"
like Al Bundy.
- I don't do that.
- Well, my husband cried.
And now,
I feel like I need advice
from one of my best friends.
And we're also hosting
a dinner party this week.
And you know what happens
at dinner parties
on shows like this,
so buckle up.

[intense music]

[doorbell rings]
- Hi.
- Oh
- No, can you believe it?
Why do I feel like
I want to get emotional?
- Because you built your house
from the ground up.
And we've known each other
for, like, [bleep] 18 years.
And we were all broke.
Kristina is the reason we're
filming this show right now.
Because Kristina was
working at SUR.
And she was like,
you should just work here.
And I'm like, you're so right.
If I never started working
at SUR because of Kristina,
I would never have
Vanderpump Rules,
would never have met Beau,
would never have
my [bleep] children,
and would never
have pitched this to Hulu.
It's all because of Kristina.
Give her a raise!
[laughs]
KRISTINA:
Coffee's my life.
I wake up thinking about it.
Midday, I think about it.
- You're describing coffee
the way that I think
about rosé.
Kristina knows me so well.
I've known her
longer than Katie.
And now that, like,
Georgi and Georgia are here,
Kristina is the one
I want to go vent to.
And I know she wants
to talk to me about Katie,
so I'm, like,
a little scared also.
My sister and Georgia,
they're actually
driving me insane.
- So they're staying with you
by, like, choice?
STASSI: We're coming up
on the two week mark.
They're supposed to find
their own place.
- So, OK, how is Beau handling
having your sisters there?
- All he wants is to be able
to sleep in one day.
And so he's like, if they could
just, like, be the ones
to get up with the kids,
but, like,
Beau is, like, going through
a really hard time.
- So not with your sisters.
That's like a side--
- That's like a side thing.
He has, like,
brought it up to me
how he wanted
to go back to work.
Being, like, just a dad
and taking care of the house
and all of the things
that we need,
like, doesn't fulfill him.
He was just like,
I feel like with us,
he's like, I feel so distant.
Like, it feels like we're just
like roommates or whatever.
My job is pretty high up there
on my priority list.
Judge me. I don't care.
And I don't get to put in
that much time
with my marriage.
But I absolutely can do better.
KRISTINA: I know how you feel.
But you're an amazing partner.
You love Beau,
like you just said.
- Sounds like I'm not.
- No, but you probably
kissed him this morning
when you woke up.
- No, I didn't!
- What?
That's the easiest,
like, [bleep].
- Oh, [bleep].
OK, I'll do it tomorrow.
- Step one.
Kiss him more.
- I'm gonna do it tomorrow.
I need to put it in my notes.
KRISTINA: That's easy.
That's the easy one.
- On my to-do list.
And I'll take him on a date
or something, too.
- I want to know
what's going on with Katie.
Because obviously,
Katie hasn't been around.
When was the last,
like, birthday
or get-together
she's been around?
So I'm so surprised to see her.
STASSI: Yeah.
- Katie and I started SUR
kind of around the same time.
We were close then,
but then I felt like
I was giving the most
being a friend for her.
And I was getting
the bare minimum.
And I thought
Stassi felt the same.
I'm surprised Katie's here
and back in our lives.
STASSI: So I met with Katie.
The goal was to say
how I really felt
and why I've ghosted.
I didn't mention
the wedding part, OK?
I left that out.
- You don't need to.
Honestly, that was
such a beautiful trip.
- Great.
Let's not even air it.
- OK, I'll spill the tea.
I shared a hotel
with Katie in Italy.
She was obsessed with Rob.
I mean, she was just
talking about him nonstop.
"Should I send
this text message" nonstop.
Like, had one too many drinks
and was like,
"Should I go to his room?"
Like, I just wanted
to be in Italy.
Like, I didn't want
to hear about Rob
over my "ca-shay pepe."
[laughter]
- Did I say it wrong, girl?
- Close enough.
[bell dings]
- I can't just, like,
pretend that those,
like, years didn't happen.
- Well, how did she react?
- She apologized
and also was like,
"I just feel like
you don't want to hang out
"with anyone unless
you married them,
birthed them, or pay them."
And I'm like, mic drop.
- That comment was like
older Katie,
the Katie you don't want
to be around.
And I'm always going to be
protective with Stassi.
So if this is how you feel
about Stassi's friends,
then why do you even want
to be here?
It's like,
who the [bleep] are you?
- OK, so Katie's gonna
be around more?
- She'll be around
a little bit more.
- I don't think I'm gonna make
a huge effort.
- I didn't even mean
to create drama
between Katie and Kristina.
- I'm gonna throw
a dinner party.
[laughs]
[intense music]
- Well, so far,
there's been no drama for me.
But it is episode 3.
And we're no strangers to this,
so I just want to be present
and enjoy myself
until I'm no longer
enjoying myself.
[bell dings]
- Hello.
- Oh.
Hey.
- Hi.
- The hair's--I'm obsessed.
It looks so good.
- Thank you.
- I've known Ariana
for 14 years.
We were on reality TV
for over a decade together.
And about five years ago,
we started a business.
- How's your fiancé?
- My fiancé.
- Do you love saying it?
- Yeah, it is really fun
to say "my fiancé."
- I think a major catalyst
for Ariana and Stassi
not getting along was,
Ariana was with Tom Sandoval.
And he really
didn't like Stassi.
So it kind of kept Ariana
from really getting to know
Stassi in a meaningful way.
ARIANA: How's filming been?
- I met up with Stassi
the other day.
Which I haven't done in years.
So when I decided
that I was gonna
come be a part of the show,
I told her about it.
And she was actually
very happy for me.
[bell dings]
She's a very supportive friend.
When we're talking,
she's like, yeah,
like, I had been
harboring these feelings,
like, negative feelings
for a long time.
And, you know, she's like,
you were being, like, selfish
and talking about this.
And I think,
where was the understanding
that my whole life was
just turned upside down?
I was going through divorce.
Yeah, I was being selfish.
And I think I deserved
to be selfish.
- Yeah, that's OK
to be selfish,
especially during that time.
- Stassi was queen of being
selfish for a long time.
I get not wanting to [bleep]
with people who just drain you,
but, like, also,
do you have any friends?
- [laughs]
- Besides, you know,
your husband,
and your kids,
and your assistant, like--
- I mean,
you guys are best friends.
I feel like we've all grown.
Like, I would like to think
that she has as well.
- I think she definitely--
I mean, I know it's easy
to say, like, OK, well,
she had done this in the past
and didn't grow from it
and did this in the past.
But I think the level
of this accountability
that she had to face
is unparalleled.
- I definitely had
people questioning
my friendship with her
and why I was
not speaking out against her.
But I've known Stassi
for so many years.
You know, she was
a bit ignorant at times
and wouldn't think
before she spoke,
so I think that was a real,
like, reckoning with her.
And I think she took it
very seriously.
Stassi started
listening to people.
Rather than becoming defensive,
you listen.
And you learn
where your blind spots are,
what, you know,
certain microaggressions
you've had in the past.
And you kind of sit with that
and learn from it.
It's a tender topic.
But, like, it is what it is.
- Yeah.
Well, I'm glad you guys talked.
I mean, I think
there's probably a way
to just figure out, like,
what works for you guys now.
- But it can't just be on me.
I've always kept it real
with Stassi.
And in this new chapter
of Stassi/Katie 2.0,
I'm gonna continue
to keep it real.
If I'm gonna make that effort
to be a part of your life,
you need to make that
to be part of mine too.
It's a two-way street.
I really don't want
to repeat history
and go through another
toxic friendship cycle
all on TV again.
So if it ends up
going down that path,
I have no problem walking away.
[light music]
- I wish I was going
to speak at some--
I don't know,
what do people speak at?
Styling days are
my favorite days
because I get to do these
from home.
And I get to look
through clothes.
And I get to like,
I don't know,
help Beau with the kids
while I'm trying on
cute outfits.
It's like, win-win.
- You just look so good
in, like, a peplum.
- Oh, I love a peplum.
And I'm so glad they're back.
This is so Cynthia Erivo
if I was going
to the Wicked premiere.
MAREN: This is so you.
So I'm glad you tried it.
- Gorge. Gorge.
- Tonight, so Sonia is
gonna stay until 7:00.
GEORGI: OK.
STASSI:
I told her she could leave
after Messer goes down.
And then if you and Georgia
could just put Hartford down.
Also, Sonia told me
that you talked shit about me.
I know I said that I wanted
to, like, restore the peace.
But then I heard
that Georgi was talking shit.
So now I'm like,
peace can wait.
GEORGI: No, I didn't.
- All you know how to do
is talk shit.
- I barely talk shit on you.
- I just feel like when I
watch it back on camera--
GEORGI: No, that'll be good.
- It'll be a different story.
- Stassi cuts blood out
every day of her life.
She is not close with a lot
of our family members.
Daddy paid for her college.
Daddy paid for her first car.
Daddy paid for her
first apartment with Jax
when they lived
at Vanderpump Rules.
She offers, she offers,
but then she's gonna
throw it back in my face.
"Look at how I take care
of you.
And you suck for this."
Do you ever see Stassi clean?
- Not really, but--
- No, I've never even seen her
touch a vacuum.
You ever seen Stassi clean?
- Yeah, I have.
GEORGI: You have?
- Yeah.
GEORGI: It was just cleaning.
- Why are you so concerned
with my cleaning?
- It was just like
the topic of conversation.
- OK.
GEORGI: But I'm glad
that you said this
because I'm struggling
with Georgia.
[bell dings]
- Why?
GEORGI: It's just
the most amazing relationship
when we can communicate
properly.
But when we can't, oh, my gosh,
I just want to strangle her.
BEAU: How is it
with Georgi down there?
GEORGIA: I mean, good.
Some stress.
BEAU: Why?
- Because, like,
I'm always with Georgi,
so I feel like there's
something that stress her out.
- What is she
stressed out about?
- Like, everything.
- She hasn't done anything
since she's, like, been here.
I need her to, like,
help me with the kids
when Stassi's at meetings.
I mean, you're helping me
a lot more than she is.
- I don't know, I really--
I am
- Empathetic, right.
I want to try to help,
but, I mean,
I think she has her own way.
- I just don't know
how to properly communicate
to get my point across.
And I feel like I don't want
to hurt her feelings.
And then I let, like,
small things fester in me
without just being able
to be like,
I don't like this little thing.
- Why can't you just
be direct with people?
This sounds like a you burden.
- I think I'm having
a brain aneurysm.
Like, is this déjà vu?
STASSI: This is gonna sound
harsh, but, like,
this sounds like a you burden.
- This is the second time now
that I have come to my sister
and she has said,
it's a you problem.
What are big sisters for
if it's not to, like,
hug you and comfort you
when you need them?
Like, Jesus Christ.
Why is it so hard out here
to just get some love?
Sorry, Stas, but it's true!
[laughs]
- I think she pretends
she feels good,
and then she's not.
So--and she doesn't really say
what she's not good about.
- So Georgi's playing games,
is basically
what you're trying to say.
- I feel like
something is not matching.
GEORGI: Like, I don't know
how to be blunt
without it coming off
as mean, maybe.
- Do you think I'm mean?
- Yeah, sometimes.
- This is peace.
Like, the old me would have put
her in a verbal meat grinder.
What I won't accept
is my sister talking shit
to my friends and family.
Like, that will not
and cannot stand.
[intense music]
[upbeat music]
- Let's say I died tomorrow.
Would you know what to--
how to do this?
Would you know what I want?
- Something fancy, but gaudy.
[bell dings]
- Isn't this nice?
- Let's try not to step
on any graves.
- I need to make peace
with Beau before this dinner.
So I'm taking him out
to, like, make him feel
so incredibly loved
that he forgets
about wanting
to go back to work.
[laughs]
Oh, my God, I really feel
emotional today.
I know
it's because of my period.
I really was so scared
I was pregnant.
[quirky music]
I was like, my life's over.
I think I'm just gonna
get on birth control.
- No, no, no.
I'll go get the--the thing.
I just need to figure out
what it is.
- Well, I don't know.
I might feel differently
three years from now.
Like--
- Do you think I want to have
a child at 48 years old?
- Maybe.
- I am tired.
I'm happy that, you know,
she planned out
this date and everything,
but Stassi
and these pregnancy scares,
right now,
I'm just kind of numb to them,
to be honest, because we had
one when we were in London.
And that was such a fiasco,
driving all the place
to try to find--
what do they call it?
A baby tech--baby--
baby birth detector?
Something like that--
birth con--birth--
the thing you pee on?
The stick? What's--
PRODUCER: Pregnancy test?
- Pregnancy test.
[laughter]
Stupid.
It is a pregnancy test.
This is the most talking that
we've done without the kids.
Normally, we just go to lunch
and enjoy the silence.
- OK, well, so I knew
you were gonna say that.
- Oh, you did?
- So conversation card game,
couples edition.
- Oh, my God.
- This is gonna be awkward
for people to watch.
I have gone on dates
at every stage
of a relationship on camera.
More couples should use these.
And I don't think
that we should
be embarrassed to use these.
[bell dings]
It's the worst.
You would think that,
like, being married,
you think it'd be like,
oh, we got this.
No, it's more awkward.
Describe specifically
the moment
that you realized you loved me.
It's kind of depressing.
Do you remember at Coachella,
I missed seeing Eminem
because we were just, like,
huddled in a corner
just being like,
"I love you so much.
I can't wait to marry you."
BEAU: "I love you so much."
- "We're gonna be the best
[bleep] husband and wife."
- "Oh, my God,
I love you so much."
There is something in the water
that really just
makes people confess
their love in Coachella.
- We were on molly.
- "God, this is
the best Diet Coke
"I've ever had in my life, too.
Oh, my God."
- "We're gonna have
the best [bleep] kids
"in the entire world.
Like, I've never felt
anything like this before."
- "No, you don't understand,
I really love you."
That was great water.
- It helped me express myself
and show love.
How do I love?
I don't even know
what this means.
- How do you show love?

Mm.
With so much.
[bell dings]
I really--I'm really--I'm--
[breathing heavily]
[laughs]
I really--I love you.
- It's not about that.
- I know. But I love you.
- No, Beau, how do I show love?
I'm really freaking out
right now.
I don't know how I show love
to friends either.
I don't know how I show love
to family members.
It's a mind-[bleep].
And I chose
not to think about this.
And I forgot about it.
I swept it under the rug.
And here we are in interviews
and I'm like,
this is so uncomfortable
right now.
[dog barks]
The dog feels it.
[laughs]
OK, back to the questions.
- All right.
- What do you
personally feel like
our toughest moment
together was?
- No, let's have you
start that one.
- I think being canceled.
And then therefore,
you being canceled,
that that could have
destroyed us.
Because you got punished
for things that I have done
or said.
- I remember.
- And--and you didn't
become resentful.
[tense music]
Why didn't you
become resentful?

- You got punished for things
that I have done or said.
Why didn't you
become resentful?
- You were pregnant.
[tense music]
I don't think I had time
to be resentful.
- And then you just
became protective.
But I don't want
to speak for you.
- No, that probably is
the moment where
I just started
not trusting anybody,
being very protective of you.
- I don't really know how
to even answer that question
because it--that was
such an awful [bleep]
experience for me and for her.
- It meant everything.
There wasn't a day that went by
that I wasn't like,
I'm just so grateful
that I have this man.
That's why when we, like,
fight on camera,
we're gonna be fine.
Everyone, calm down.
The G's
BEAU: Mm-hmm.
- Their relationship
is stressing me out
because I can tell
they're not getting along.
- It's gonna get awkward
quick at the house.
- Yeah, but tomorrow,
we're gonna have
a big group over for dinner.
And they are like,
we could cook.
- The G's are gonna cook?
- They're excited about it.
- All right.
[laughing]
This should be interesting.
- There's a lot I want
to accomplish with this night.
Like, I want Beau to have,
like, a good night
socializing, you know.
I also want Georgi and Georgia
to start getting
the [bleep] along.
And then I want, like,
Katie and Kristina
to kind of, like, vibe.
- A dinner party on reality TV
is essentially
like calling a team meeting.
There are all these
side conversations happening,
and everyone needs
to get on the same page.
That's what I'm doing.
I feel so at home here.
- [laughs]
[upbeat music]
- I feel like
a sensitive gangster.
- That's such a good way
of putting that for you.
You are a sensitive gangster.
- I know.

TAYLOR: Hi.
- Hello.
TEDDY: Roberto.
TAYLOR: Welcome.
This baby is on the horizon.
So we're trying to spend
as much quality time
with our friends and family
before this little bubba
pops out of Tay's vahini.
[screaming]
Why, hello!
Plus, also, I'm not quite sure
what's going on
at House of Stassi,
but just from my talk
with Beau, I feel like
there's a lot going on.
So Georgi's just
gonna come over
just to, like,
get her out of there.
TEDDY: Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi.
TEDDY: Thanks for coming.
- Thanks for having me.
- Jesus Christ,
you look beautiful.
GEORGI: Thank you.
- Are we doing stuff tonight?
Are we, like--
GEORGI:
Wait, this is my favorite.
- I know.
- This is like
all my favorites.
- No, I got you
that cheese that--
- No. Like, you're so sweet.
- We were at the grocery store.
- Like, that is so kind.
- I know.
- I am so excited to be
at the Taylors' tonight.
I'm even more excited
to eat their food,
because tomorrow night,
I'm cooking
for the dinner party.
So I'm just gonna relax,
sit here, enjoy myself.
- What's Georgia doing tonight?
- And also, I'm Georgia free.
Party!
- Luda.
Keecha.
- Like, did we not
include Georgia?
- I forgot.
- No, but it's OK.
It's OK.
- I think this is nice for me.
ROB: Yeah.
TEDDY:
Georgi needs a little break.
- Yeah, Georgia and I don't
have to do everything together.
TEDDY: So how is it
with Georgia, though?
Is she driving you nuts?
- Y'all, last night,
she's like, I am so stressed.
I'm so stressed.
She goes, I feel guilty because
we're staying here for free.
TAYLOR: OK.
GEORGI: I've been waking up
every day at 8:00 AM
because I have to help Beau.
And I'm like, but I'm also
not here to be a nanny.
That's not why I'm here.
I'm here to do
my own life in LA.
I'm trying to be here
closer to family, yes.
But no, I'm not gonna get
my happy ass up
at 8:00 AM every morning.
- I know what Georgi's saying
about, like,
"I didn't know I was gonna
be required to help so much
with the kids like a nanny."
But also given
that while she's living under
Stassi and Beau's roof
for free,
I think it would be
really good for Georgi
to step up to the plate.
Like, change a diaper.
- I'm glad I feel free
to be able to come to you
and be like, oh, my God,
Stassi's bothering me.
And I feel scared.
And when she yells at me,
it makes me so sad.
And I want to cry.
And I want to vomit.
And I [bleep] hate my life.
I come to you and I say
all of those things.
- You do,
and I want you to come to me
because I love you very much.
You know what I mean?
- Yeah, same.
- And I consider you
like a little sister.
And I want to protect you.
And I want you to come to me
for all that stuff.
- Little sister? That's weird.
- Why, do you--
why, do you want to have sex
with him?
- No, that's what I'm saying.
ROB: Oh, God, you've been
sleeping in the bed
with Georgia too much.
- Stop. I'm done.
ROB: Wait, now--
so now that Georgi's here,
what was your conversation
with Beau?
- So Beau came over here
and he said,
I really need to get back
to work.
- Yeah.
TAYLOR: He mentioned to Stassi.
And she was like, I'll pay you
not to go back to work.
TEDDY: To casting specifically.
TAYLOR: Yes.
And she was like,
what would you make?
And I'll pay you that
because losing you--
- She's kind of cutting
Beau's balls off
by not letting him work.
- He was crying.
So I said, have you
told her all of this?
And he was like, no, because
I don't like confrontation,
which I totally get.
- Beau is avoiding conflict.
He avoided me for nine months.
- Do you think
that Beau is fully happy?
- I don't think so.
But I don't know
how long Beau can avoid
his problems with Stassi
before it all blows up
in his face.
The people
that used to know Beau
know--
they're like, what the [bleep]?
Like, what is he doing,
you know?
And that's why Katie called me
out on it in the car
on the way to your party
yesterday.
- Oh, yeah,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
Go back.
How the [bleep] did you guys
end up going together?
- Katie and I?
TAYLOR: Yeah.
- We just live near each other.
- OK. I don't know.
I just--I feel like I haven't
seen Katie since Italy.
I mean, 'cause her and Stassi
just, like,
were not that close.
And I feel like
I was friendly with Katie
because Stassi and her
were friends.
Katie's, like, not somebody
who I think I would
naturally gravitate towards.
I tend to be
a little hard on her.
I had a really rough night
with her at the Polo Lounge.
She was talking about vitamins
for, like, 2 1/2 hours
straight.
And it made me crazy.
I love Beau and I'm
really worried about him,
so I'm gonna do whatever
it takes to support him
and Stassi.
But I don't love Katie.
So I'm gonna do whatever
I can to put her in her place
if she gives me a reason to.
[tense music]
[dramatic music]

RECEPTIONIST: So you're gonna
go into this room here.
- Oh, my gosh.
- You know the drill.
Change into your gown,
open from the back.
- I'm bringing Georgia
to Botox with me today
because she thinks everything
we Americans do is weird.
And so I just know I'm gonna
have a good time with her.
- Are you doing your face?
- My face is already done.
Plus, she and Georgi
haven't been getting along,
so I feel like she probably has
some valuable information
I might need.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
Georgia.
- This is my Italian
sister-in-law.
- OK, awesome.
- Dr. Firouz, he's the best.
- I swear, when I go to Italy,
I eat whatever I want,
I lose weight.
[laughs]
- He's kind of like
family to me.
This is my plastic surgeon.
He's the best.
- Oh, my God.
- That's so LA.
- We're doing
the whole shebang?
- I need to snatch
this [bleep] jaw and face.
- I got you.
[bell dings]
- Hold it, hold it, hold it.
GEORGIA: I know it's all me,
but there's just something
that makes me feel,
in Italy, it's safer.
That's a lot of Botox.
And here, you do
really strong Botox,
I have to say,
like, really strong.
But the result works.
- Gonna be snatched
in three, four days.
Thank you so much.
- Good to see you.
- Always keeping me
looking hot.
- Yes, ma'am.
All right, bye, guys.
BOTH: Bye.
- I don't think
Georgi's ever gotten Botox.
- I don't think so.
- I feel the off and on.
Sometimes, y'all are
obsessed with each other.
And sometimes, y'all don't want
anything to do with each other.
- Of course, it's hard being,
you know, 24/7 together.
But also, like,
there's some weird energy
I get from her,
seeing the changing
of behavior.
- I don't know what you're
talking about right now.
- Basically, we were talking
about helping with the kids.
- I'm here to start my life
in LA,
and my career, and all that.
I'm not here to be a nanny.
I need me time too.
GEORGIA:
If yes, let's talk to them
to understand
the schedule properly.
So if you want, you can have
a talk with her,
like, so that we make it clear
both sides.
And then she's like,
mm, I prefer
not to talk to her because
how scared she is from you.
- Scared of me?
- She's a dark
[bleep] passenger.
So in my mind, yeah,
I'm gonna tiptoe around Stas
every chance I get.
I'm terrified,
and I don't want to ever be
put in a situation
like Villa again.
- You're making me feel like
Stassi is a serial killer.
- She says nothing to my face.
- I don't understand
why she speaks like that.
STASSI:
It's hard for me to believe
that someone can be
that two-faced, you know?
Like, when all I've asked for
is honesty, and openness,
and being direct with me.
- She's like,
you don't know my sister
when I was a little girl.
And you don't know the behavior
she had with me and my mom.
- She goes around telling
everyone, "Stassi raised me.
She was like my mom."
- That's why then I wanted,
you know
STASSI: That's [bleep].
- To talk to you
because I'm like,
you're picturing your sister
as a monster.
Because she used
the word "terrifying,"
like, three times.
- This is incredibly
frustrating, because, like,
I hear Georgi's calling me
a monster.
Yet she's coming to me
for advice
about every single problem.
It's freaky that she could be
walking around my house
and being so nice
and up my ass,
and then go march
her ass downstairs
and call me terrifying.
Like, I'm gonna need her
to clarify.
You don't get to [bleep]
go and call me a monster.
Like, if someone's
sitting there
acting one way to my face
and then consistently
talking shit behind my back,
you're done.
- She's so [bleep]
two-faced, it's like insane.
My brain hurts.
[tense music]
[light music]

- Maybe you should--
you're just gonna
pour it in there?
OK.
- This might be the dinner
party from hell coming,
because Georgi
and Georgia keep fighting.
Kristina's mad at Katie
for what she said.
Just like a lot of "ew"
going on.
Like, everyone needs
to get it together now.
My show, OK?
So I don't know
how this is gonna go.
Oh, my gosh, you know what
you look like right now?
And I mean this
as a compliment.
[bell dings]
A redheaded
alternative Cinderella.
I'm really annoyed
that Georgi has now talked shit
about me behind my back twice.
But I don't want
to ruin this dinner.
Like, that dinner looks good.
So like, I'm not gonna
confront her
while she's cooking.
So she might want
to cook forever.
[tense music]
Hi.
- Hi, stranger.
- I missed you so much.
- Good to see you.
- How's it going?
- Hi.
- Oh.
BOTH: Cheers.
- I'm conflicted about Katie
being back in Stassi's life.
There has been things
that she's done in the past
to Stassi that I didn't love.
Like, kind of being
self-absorbed
and not being there for Stassi
during one of the hardest times
for Stassi.
And it's like, Katie,
can you get your head
out of your own ass
and show up for your friends?
I think I'm more protective
of Stassi
than Stassi is of Stassi.
- Everyone, we got our
charcoochie boards right here.
We got our endives.
This is blue cheese,
caramelized walnuts,
balsamic glaze,
burrata with cherry tomatoes.
- Fancy.
TAYLOR: You did all this?
- I did all of this.
- No, she did all of this.
- I'm dead.
How long did this take you?
- Like three hours.
- That's how long it takes her
to make, like, a small salad.
ROB: Hi, everybody.
KATIE: Hi.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- Good. How are you?
- Good. Good to see you.
ROB: Look at this.
GEORGI: Yeah?
ROB: Mm.
It looks like--
like a scene from The Holiday
or something like--
- Wait, that's really sweet.
- OK.
- You know what I mean?
- I love that.
TEDDY: Tay and I had to record
a podcast, and I was like--
- Ah, son of a bitch.
Rerun.
[groans]
[bell dings]
- Wait, I'm excited that you're
gonna do Tell Me Lies.
- Oh, come on, man.
I'm obsessed with that show.
ROB: We're good.
- Thank you so much.
You do really look good.
- Oh, thank you.
- I like what you're doing
with your hair.
- Oh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Do you cook?
- Yeah.
- I didn't know that.
- Yeah, I like cooking.
- I gotta learn how to cook.
- Trying to be wifey.
Cheers.
- How's it going at home?
You got, like,
a full house of people
with Georgi and Georgia here?
- No, like, I get annoyed
all the time.
They're having issues.
We know my sister lies.
She loves to talk shit.
Like, she loves
to go to people,
but then can never
own her stuff.
But she claims she does.
She's like, "What?
Anything I say,
I'd say it to your face."
I'm like, but you don't.
And me and Beau and Georgi,
we're just upstairs having
a normal night, just like
having dinner,
talking, laughing,
telling stories.
And then the next day,
Georgia's telling me
she came downstairs,
was crying,
playing the victim card,
yelling about me,
saying I'm a monster.
"You haven't seen her
on Vanderpump Rules.
She's terrifying."
That's--that's spooky
serial killer stuff.
- You can't have this
in your house.
STASSI: No.
- Do you know
what this calls for?
A vintage ambush, just to get
things out in the open.
- You're so right.
[bell dings]
- [singing in Latin]
- This is why
I'm so glad Katie's back.
She knows me so well.
And, like, I just needed to be
reminded that, like,
it's OK to be my old self
for a good cause,
like ambushing Georgi.
- Stassi can smell bullshit
from a mile away.
She knows
when someone's lying to her.
And she knows how to get
the truth out of them.
She's slapped the truth
out of someone before.
- Violence is not the answer.
But that was
a really good ambush.
I've been living in, like,
"trying to keep peace
in my house" world.
- No, [bleep] peace.
- Dinner's ready.
STASSI: OK.
- It's fine. It's fine.
It's all good. It's all good.
- It's all good.
[tense music]
- I just made the pasta,
but with so much love.
KATIE: What's this?
TAYLOR: Salmon.
- Oh, all right.
Does it have bones?
- They said they de-boned it.
- I've choked on salmon bones.
TAYLOR: For real?
- Yeah, you guys, I've choked
on a lot of things.
- [laughs]
TAYLOR: So yummy.
GEORGI: Yeah? Good.
TAYLOR: Thank you.
GEORGI: Of course.
TAYLOR: How are you feeling,
by the way?
- Literally had
a mental breakdown yesterday.
TAYLOR: What happened?
GEORGI: Oh, my God,
it was awful.
After me and Georgia had this,
like, huge talk,
and I, like, freaked out.
But then she went
and told Stassi
literally everything I said.
She's like, "But Stassi asked."

- Have you said
the things or whatever
you said to her to Stassi?
- No, and that's the thing.
- OK, well
GEORGI: No, I know
it needs to happen now.
At this point it does.
Like, it's not my job
to come in here
and do literally everything.
Like, does it say "everyone's
bitch" on my forehead?
- What are you talking about?
[bell dings]
- Me and Georgia's
conversation.
- Oh.
I couldn't actually,
like, even believe it.
- What?
Believe what?
- That you would complain about
me in any sense of the word.
Like, I can't believe
you have one thing
actually to complain about--
- But the fact that you're not
gonna ask what I said
or ask for the conversation,
but completely believe Georgia?

- Georgia has never lied.
And you have consistently lied.
Get the [bleep] out of here
as soon as possible.

- Georgia has never lied,
and you have consistently lied.
- About what?
STASSI: Like you go
and you shit talk.
And then when I catch you
in something,
or someone catches you
in something,
you'll scurry around it
or make excuses for it.
[dramatic music]
She's not making this shit up.
Tell me what you said.
GEORGI: OK, so we started
talking about the nanny thing.
And I was a bit overwhelmed
because one,
this isn't my life.
I came into it.
Yeah, the kids
are a lot for me.
It is,
because I'm not used to that.
But I also do love those kids.
You know
that I love those kids.
- Oh, it's not about
loving them.
- No, but I still do want
to help out.
STASSI: No.
GEORGI: Let me finish!
We have a job to do.
So it's like--
- Your job is also
to find your place in LA.
- I do want to jump in,
but, like,
I'm not touching this
with a 10-foot pole.
- Get the [bleep] out
of here as soon as possible.
[indistinct arguing]
- Oh, Jesus Christ.
STASSI: So then do it.
GEORGI: I will.
- Don't leave, 'cause I don't--
I don't--I don't want
any, like--I'm not like--
- I'm not leaving.
I want to crawl
into my own vagina
and go into my own womb
right now.
- I will tiptoe around you
because I don't want
to set you off or say something
that you will then bring it
to a 10.
I don't mean that
to be an asshole,
but it is triggering for me.
- Why would you want
to be close to somebody
that you're so terrified of?
That's what I want to know.
Because I feel--
I feel [bleep] around with.
Because you have--
you have spent--
you wrote me this long--
this letter.
- I come to you with things
that really mean a lot to me
that matter.
And instead, you shit on it.
- I don't feel like
you've ever thought through
any of the choices
that you make.
And so I feel like I constantly
have to figure it out for you.
- I can still love you.
I love you.
I appreciate you.
I love you.
- I think you love
what I can do for you.
- What can you do for me?

- [exhales]
- [laughs]
- Georgi,
what can I do for you?
- Yes.
- What can I do for you?
I pick up your slack.
And I pay for things
and help you out
before you even ask for it.
Because I know
that you need it.
- That's not true.
- Oh, OK, how are you
existing right now, Georgi?
I had to pay you $2,000
over the last two weeks
just so that you could live.
- But I didn't ask for that.
- This is diabolical.
I'm doing everything for you.
I am keeping this bitch alive.
You don't have a job.
- It doesn't matter.
- You're homeless.
Are you joking?
You kind of sound like
an ungrateful wench.
GEORGI: I'm not.
STASSI: I'm not joking.
GEORGI: How?
STASSI: Like--
- What?
STASSI: How [bleep] dare you?
ROB: Is she coming to stay
with me tonight?
- [laughing]
I don't know.
- Go be without me
and figure out your life.
[door creaks]
- Kristina Kelly. Hi.
Don't go into the kitchen.
ROB: Don't go into the kitchen.
- Do not go into the kitchen.
When Stassi starts yelling,
oh, God.
I'm just--
Guess where I ate.
- [Rob laughs]
KRISTINA: Are you serious?
- No, yeah.
Who's gonna go in there
and get the rosé?
Who, who, who?
- Kristina Kelly wanted
a glass of wine, so
yeah.
TAYLOR: Oh, she's here?
KATIE: We're gonna go say hi.
[awkward music]

Sister fights. Sister fights.
GEORGI: All I did was talk
about my [bleep] feelings.
Why is that not OK?
We all know
that I'm a [bleep] mess.
Like, but it's not
that I'm hating on you.
Like, I actually think
we've really established
a better relationship.
But yeah, there are still
kinks that I need to work out,
and that's OK.
Like, I don't care
about being right or wrong.
I really don't care.
It's, I want to be heard.
I didn't move here for you,
but I wanted to be--
I moved here for myself
and also want to be close
to you.
I just feel like
I keep trying with her.
And I'm just getting, like,
[bleep] knocked on the head
every time
and buried underground.
And I'm just like,
I'm so over it.
- I just wish
that Georgi would just
tell me how she feels
in the moment
when she's feeling
these things.
It's really hard
to hurt my feelings.
So, like, say
whatever you want to me.
I'm like the Terminator.
- My hands will be to myself
and this little girl in here.
- You know, I really thought
I had moved on.
The medication's been working.
The therapy is good.
But you stroking
my wife's belly right now,
it's making me crazy.
Murderous.
- She's moving. She likes this.
- I'm the one
who she gives attention to.
I'm the one that touches her.
- I started doing circles
around your belly button.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Are you coming
to lesbian night, lesbian?
KRISTINA: I'm just hearing
about lesbian night right now.
- You're not invited.
- Yeah, well,
Georgi's new to LA.
And so she wants to, like,
mingle with some--some ladies.
- Georgi likes girls?
KATIE: Yeah.
ROB: Mm-hmm.
- Oh.
- I'm the lesbian plug.
[tense music]
KRISTINA: It feels off
having Katie here now.
I know Stassi's,
you know, accepted apologies.
They talked it out.
But this is convenient.
We're filming a reality show,
and now you're here.
Tay, can you talk?
- Yeah.
KRISTINA: Yeah?
I get annoyed
when I see her now
because I haven't addressed it.
There hasn't felt like
a right time to address it.
- I brought the bottle of wine
with me because I am no fool.
- I want to talk to Taylor
because I need that validation
of someone else
who's just as close with Stassi
to make sure I'm not
going crazy about this.
- Listen, I don't know
why the lesbians
aren't throwing lesbian night,
but Katie
and the bisexuals are.
- Honestly, I'm more annoyed
that Katie's, like,
entered the chat.
- Did you hear about
their talk at Belmont?
Because I haven't talked
to Stassi since they
met up together.
- Yeah.
- And?
- Yeah, she said that they
really put it all out there.
They laid it out there.
I mean, Katie basically said,
"You don't hang out with anyone
who's not on your payroll."
- [Taylor gasps]
- To Stassi.
- Wow.
OK, so that's the only reason
I'm in Stassi's life
is because--not 'cause I've
been a great friend to her,
not because I've known her
for so many--I mean--
- No, you're at the table
because you're getting paid,
according to Katie.
Yeah.
- Good to [bleep] know.
Pissed doesn't even begin
to explain
how I feel right now.
I'm not even in my mind angry.
I'm physically angry.
If she's gonna call me
somebody that's on the payroll,
then I have some things
to tell her.
So, like, if she wants
to play this game,
I guess we can [bleep] play it.
It's taking everything
for me not to go inside
and scream at her.
I'm [bleep] pissed.
Les night is about
to get spicy.
- Have fun at gay night.
[dramatic music]
- I didn't say all your friends
are on your payroll.
- That's [bleep] bullshit.
- I'm feeling, like,
buyer's remorse from, like,
being a part of this
because I'm not wanted here.
STASSI: Beau is going
to love this house.
- I just want
to enjoy this tonight.
And I don't want to fight.
- Have you guys ever hooked up?
- You're an asshole.
- It's not your problem.
- This is the same
childish, stupid shit.
- So because you're married
makes you a more mature person.
- Yes, it is.
- [bleep] you.
- I [bleep] hate this.
And I can't believe
that you [bleep] started this.
Because now you decided
to explode
and make yourself look dumb.
- Are you joking?

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