Prison School (2015) s01e03 Episode Script

[KIYOSHI] Because of the golden
shower incident the other day,
Hana has been relieved
from overseer duties.
And the Vice President
only checks
the trash area occasionally.
And now Today, at last
You don't start off
with your right hand,
--you use your left.
--[GAKUTO] Listen closely.
You'll go through the hole
today, and scout the other side.
[KIYOSHI]
Sort of a practice run, huh?
[GAKUTO] Endeavor to engage
in the foray for one hour.
A whole hour?
You'll have gone for three hours
on the day of the
actual excursion.
[KIYOSHI]
Good point.
When you put it that way, it
doesn't really sound so bad.
One thing
Just make sure to be back here
by the time the bell rings.
Understood.
[CHAIRMAN]
I have failed Mari as a father.
To have allowed her
to find my collection
of beautiful Latina booties,
not once, but twice?
Hm
It is my responsibility,
as both an educator and a
father, to seal these away.
Damn it.
[KIYOSHI] Guess I should
check my escape route.
--Train? It's over there.
--[MAN 3A] Come on.
[GIRL 3A]
What? Like right now?
[KIYOSHI] Stupid happy couple!
Just you watch!
I'll make some moves on Chiyo.
And if I play my cards right,
I might even get to second base!
The Chairman?
Where is the other one?
Uh-- Sir Kiyoshi's dropping
of debris in the back.
Shall I summon him
for you, Madam?
[MEIKO] There's no need.
Get back to work.
[GAKUTO]
That was significantly easier
than I thought it would be.
Isabel, summer of 1986, Brazil.
Such a fine behind.
Never forget.
[smooch]
Evita
[KIYOSHI] What the hell is this
old dickhead doing anyway?
And how long is
he going to take?
Speed it up, Grandpa!
--[bell chimes]
--[KIYOSHI] Oh shit!
The bell!
[MEIKO]
Where is Kiyoshi?
Still working in the back?
Very astute.
Kiyoshi! Front and center, now!
[GAKUTO]
Kiyoshi! What are you doing?!
Show yourself!
Allow me to go and
fetch him, Milady.
No I'll go.
[GAKUTO] Kiyoshi! You
must return post-haste!
[CHAIRMAN] I'll miss you,
my beautiful brown buncakes.
[KIYOSHI]
He's finally leaving!
[pants]
[grunts]
[sighs]
[gasps]
[KIYOSHI]
What the f--?!
I slipped right
through here earlier!
[GAKUTO]
Quickly!
[KIYOSHI grunting] It's no use!
I guess it's all over
[MEIKO grunts]
[GAKUTO] Madam Vice President!
Are you unhurt?
[MEIKO grunts]
Kiyoshi! If you're
there, answer me!
I'm sorry, ma'am.
[MEIKO]
And you, straighten this mess!
Unbelievable!
What the blazes took
you so long to get back?
I can't even begin
to explain it.
I just used up the
ploy I was saving
for the actual day
of your bold egress.
You mean, that was you?
I shall have to concoct another
subtle yet brilliant
contrivance.
There's one more thing.
We've gotta work on
making that hole larger.
I only got in halfway last time.
[SHINGO sighs]
Is it too much to ask for
something other than news?
[GAKUTO] We must quickly devise
some way to keep the overseers
distracted for three hours
during the breakout
As for the hole,
one more day of solid
hammering should handle it.
--[SHINGO] Yo!
--[BOTH gasp]
What're you guys talkin' 'bout?
Oh This and that.
[SHINGO] You two seem to
have gotten closer recently.
Comrades in bondage.
Well, we are working
together a lot lately.
Right
[MEIKO] I've come to collect
the purchase request forms
that were handed out
to you the other day.
Tank tops and booty shorts?
I flock to your siren's call!
I'm dressed for bed!
Now, submit your forms!
Kiyoshi wants a dictionary.
Not happening.
For Andre, disappearing ink.
Denied.
For Shingo, hair gel. Denied.
For Joe, an ant farm. Maybe.
And a pocket audio player
for Gakuto. Denied.
But I need it for my
foreign language practice!
[MEIKO]
Do you? Then we'll consider it.
Madam, I am in your debt.
[MEIKO]
Attention!
I'm posting next
month's schedule.
[BOYS gasp, sigh]
I was starting to get used
to the random panty flashes
and those bazookas hangin'
out of her school uniform.
But this new look
reminds me how hot she is.
[ANDRE]
It's like covering everything up
makes it more naughty.
[GAKUTO] And I, myself, am a
total sucker for hot pants!
[JOE coughing]
I wanna eat sushi off that ass.
[MEIKO] All right, you
boys give it a look over.
Umm Excuse me?
Yes, what?
Won't next Saturday's work
be the same as always?
It's what's written down.
That's the day the track club's
regional meet is being held.
Your usual work assignments
will change to providing
aid for the event.
I've a query, Madam.
[MEIKO]
Which is?
Could you describe in detail
the exact nature of this
work and where it will be?
Three of you were assigned
to purse watching detail,
and the rest miscellaneous.
Gakuto, Shingo, and
Kiyoshi are on purses,
while Joe and Andre will
fill in where needed.
[GAKUTO]
Hm
[KIYOSHI]
Three of us, huh?
Check it out.
Our purse watching gig's gonna
be in front of that restroom.
[GAKUTO]
Hm
The distance from here
to the refuse area
presents a whole new problem.
How do we get you to the
hole in the wall unseen?
And that's not all.
Hey, I'm looking
forward to Saturday.
They'll sing songs
about our ding dongs.
[BOTH chuckle nervously]
[GAKUTO]
What's to be done about Shingo?
[KIYOSHI] With him lurking
around on Saturday,
I won't be able
to leave our post.
[GAKUTO]
Do you think it's possible
that Shingo might have become
cognizant of our escape ploy?
I think he knows
we're up to something.
At this point, we may have
to bring him in on our plan.
[SHINGO]
Saturday'll be nice.
I've barely gotten to
hang out with Kiyoshi
since all this work started.
[KIYOSHI]
Squeeze in another?
I don't think we can.
Of course we can.
He'll go for it.
It's Shingo.
There's no way he's as
tight-assed as that!
[SHINGO] They're talking
about squeezing things in!
And tight asses!
An issue--
What incentive can we give Sir
Shingo to gain his assistance?
His request for hair
gel was denied.
I bet a little grease
is all it would take.
[SHINGO]
It couldn't be!
[GAKUTO] I honestly doubt
he would go for it.
[SHINGO] What are they
planning to squeeze in
and why would it need
to be greased up?!
[SHINGO] That conversation
today was insane.
I'd heard that kind of
thing happened in prison,
but maybe I misunderstood.
I've known Kiyoshi since
we were in middle school.
He's not like that.
So, what the hell do
we do about Shingo?
[GAKUTO]
Hmm
[gasps]
How clumsy of me.
I'm gonna to slip right by.
[KIYOSHI]
Do your thing.
[SHINGO]
"Do your thing"?!
Is Gakuto really
that good at it?!
[GAKUTO groans]
Faceplant! You okay?
[SHINGO]
No. I can't believe it!
I must be seeing things!
Stop over thinking, Shingo.
There's no way.
[GAKUTO grunting]
No It's rather painful.
[SHINGO screams]
[KIYOSHI, GAKUTO gasp]
[KIYOSHI]
Shingo! Did he hear us?
[GAKUTO] Does he know
what we're planning?
[SHINGO]
Oh shit, they're hardcore!
And they've totally got
their eyes on me, now!
Oh! Sir Shingo!
Join us and come in here.
Don't just stand there,
the water's fine!
Plus, it's good for your skin!
[GAKUTO] Yours truly will gladly
wash your back for you.
Know what?
I'm actually good.
[KIYOSHI] You know you
want to. Come on in!
Remember, Shingo, you're the one
who said you looked forward to
the three of us hanging
out and having a blast--
[SHINGO] This isn't the kinda
blast I was talking about!
In fact, I've changed my mind.
I'm out! Sorry, guys!
--[KIYOSHI] Hold up, Shingo!
--[GAKUTO] Sir Shingo!
[MEIKO panting]
Excuse me!
--[BOTH gasp]
--[MEIKO] What?
It's about Saturday's
work assignments.
Miscellaneous duties should
be busier than purse watching.
Allow me to volunteer
to help with that!
[MEIKO]
Very well. Granted.
[SHINGO]
Thank you so much!
What came over Shingo?
Odd.
Well, whatever changed
his mind, I'm glad.
[GAKUTO]
The quandary remains.
How does one reach the hole
in the wall from this post?
[KIYOSHI] How do I move unseen
from the side of this restroom
over to the collapsed shed?
I can't just cut across the
grounds, out in the open.
[KIYOSHI grunting]
[KIYOSHI]
What's this?
[GAKUTO]
That's odd.
Am I imagining things?
I thought I heard
Kiyoshi's voice.
He's been in the
lavatory a long time.
Hope he's not ill.
--[KIYOSHI] Gakuto.
--[GAKUTO gasps]
[KIYOSHI]
Down here.
Hey-oh!
[GAKUTO]
Sir Kiyoshi!
[KIYOSHI]
Keep your voice down, 3PO!
[GAKUTO]
My apologies.
[KIYOSHI]
It's on, now.
This is how I'll get here
from the purse-watching post
without being seen.
Couldn't be more perfect.
[KIYOSHI] The drainage
channel is covered.
And it runs all around
the school grounds.
It's also wide enough for a
single person to crawl through.
Just now
I got in behind the restroom
and worked my way over here!
[GAKUTO]
Sir Kiyoshi,
that was uncharacteristically
brilliant of you.
[KIYOSHI] Wow. Your confidence
is really inspiring.
All right. I'm takin' off.
Gonna find my way
back to the restroom.
[ANDRE]
What, no kidding?
[SHINGO]
Dead serious.
[ANDRE] I never would've
thought that Kiyoshi and Gakuto
would end up in a physical
relationship together.
[JOE coughing]
Real shocker.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
To be honest,
I thought they'd both been
acting really strange lately.
Then, I walked in on them.
Gakuto was going down on
Kiyoshi prison shower style.
[KIYOSHI] Lying bastard!
That never happened!
[SHINGO]
That totally happened.
To be sure, I went
in for another look.
There they were.
Whoa. So there's more to it?
You don't mean
Yeah, down and dirty butt time.
Gakuto was getting
drilled by Kiyoshi.
--[GAKUTO grunting]
--I heard Gakuto
complain that it hurt.
From my understanding,
that makes Kiyoshi a top.
Gakuto's such a bottom.
[KIYOSHI]
This is bullshit!
I never drilled anyone,
front or back!
Look, I don't care
if those dudes
want to bang each
other or whatever.
They're still totally
my buddies regardless.
Did someone say you dicknoses
could take a break?
--[BOYS] Sorry!
--[KIYOSHI gasps]
[MEIKO] I take my eyes
off of you for one second
[KIYOSHI] Meiko's standing
directly over the trench slit.
And it's amazing!
[MEIKO sighs] Time to
pick up where I left off.
--[exhales]
--[KIYOSHI gasps]
She's gonna keep doing her Hindu
deep squats right above me?
[KIYOSHI] The Vice President's
nether-regions are moving away.
Then moving in, then
moving away, then moving in.
Then moving away.
Then moving in.
Then moving away.
[GAKUTO] If Sir Kiyoshi
doesn't return soon,
it's bound to raise suspicions!
[KIYOSHI]
In, away, in, away, in
No! It may be the greatest
thing I've ever seen,
but if I don't get
back, I'm screwed!
[muffled yelp]
[MEIKO]
Huh? Did I step on a rat?
Talk about disgusting.
The sun is setting.
Work for today has
come to an end.
But before we stop,
there's something I'd
like to ask you.
Kiyoshi, step forward.
All right.
[MEIKO] You were in the
restroom an awfully long time
this afternoon.
Were you skipping out on work?
No. I wouldn't dream of it.
My dear friend Kiyoshi has
a rather delicate stomach.
[MEIKO]
Really?
Strange, he never had
an issue with it before.
Could I say something?
I'm afraid they're not
telling you the whole truth
about what's really going on.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Well? Out with it.
I'll tell you the real reason.
His hemorrhoids.
[ALL gasp]
[KIYOSHI] Where'd all
that blood come from?!
Oh, shit. It's from the Vice
President's heel stomp earlier.
[SHINGO] Looks like
he's not just a pitcher.
[JOE]
He's a catcher, too.
[ANDRE] Well he's
definitely never gonna be
a power bottom.
[GAKUTO]
Huh?
[MEIKO] The items you asked for
the other day have arrived.
Come up and grab
what's yours.
[BOYS gasp]
[GAKUTO] Now I can work
on my foreign language
listening comprehension!
What, like Italian?
Au contraire, my simple
friend! This is for--
[MEIKO]
One more thing.
It's about your
IT class tomorrow.
It will be held in the school's
computer lab, with the girls.
[BOYS gasp]
Unfortunately, there
are no computers here
for the prison population.
Be on your best behavior.
Oh, yeah!
With the ladies!
We're in with the bitches!
Dude, this is great!
In class with the girls!
[GAKUTO chuckles]
Just as I surmised.
Do what now?
This is our contingency plan.
[KIYOSHI]
Uh
[STUDENT 3B]
Despicable.
[STUDENT 3C]
This sucks.
[STUDENT 3D]
They smell like feet!
It sounded so good.
[coughs] Yeah This blows.
Hm? What? I like basking
in the girls' derision.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Chiyo.
[CHIYO]
Su-more of you Saturday!
[KIYOSHI]
Yeah, su-more of you Saturday!
Gakuto, what's your plan?
While you're sneaking
out of the lavatory,
using a remote, yours
truly shall play back
the sounds of defecation
loaded onto this device.
In doing so, we can
buy some more time.
Big Bad Nerima General!
Are the poop sounds
on it already?
Not yet.
Huh?
You still don't get it?
Whilst formulating this plan,
yours truly thought ahead to the
exploitation of computer class.
[KIYOSHI]
Is that the net?
[GAKUTO]
Indeed.
I should find a treasure
trove of sound links.
But alas!
My "poop mp3" searches
have resulted in nothing!
This is our shot!
There's no more computers.
It's do or die time, dude!
I'm well aware of that!
But no matter how hard I search,
I can't get anything
to come out!
[KIYOSHI]
But if nothing comes out
[GAKUTO]
we must force it out!
[KIYOSHI gasps]
No, we can't do that!
It's way too risky!
Besides, which one of us
is gonna poop on record?
[GAKUTO]
This is the only way.
[KIYOSHI]
It's okay. Give it up.
We gave it our best.
[GAKUTO] Sir Kiyoshi,
is that how little regard
you have for your
upcoming sumo date?
These headphones also
work as a microphone.
[blows]
Don't do it, man!
You have any idea
what will happen
if you go through with this?
It may indeed be too much
to ask of you, Brave Knight.
If you did so in front
of the fair Chiyo,
your date would be cancelled
and your cause for
escape rendered moot.
[KIYOSHI]
It's not just me.
You shouldn't do this either.
It's gonna ruin the next
three years of your life.
My life?
Yours truly thought that
if I went to a school
with so many damsels,
I'd have a shot at
finding a girlfriend.
[KIYOSHI]
Over three years, you can!
There's a thousand
babes here, man.
[GAKUTO] However, those
figurines only come once
every four years.
The math is rather simple.
My final equation tells me,
it is easier to struggle
through three years than
persevere through four.
This is ridiculous!
You'd rather have some figurine
than a high school life?
Without a doubt.
[KIYOSHI]
Please stop! Think it over!
If this were elementary,
that's one thing.
But we're in high school, man!
Kiyoshi I leave
it all in your hands.
Gakuto, no!
[GAKUTO]
Forgive me.
[wet farts]
Teacher! Please allow me
to go to the restroom.
By all means, go ahead.
But it may be a little after
the fact at this point.
[KIYOSHI]
Gakuto
I swear your social death
won't have been for nothing.
Hey, Dick Nose!
What's up with the slacks?
They're due to ineluctable
circumstances, Madam.
[MEIKO] What kind of
ineluctable circumstances?
Well, it's uh
You will answer me!
Yours truly
in the middle of class
soiled mine striped breeches.
How pathetic!
You're a high-schooler,
and yet you shit yourself?
Is your pooper
really that loose?
Time for some Kegels.
Yes, probably a good idea.
That's top-notch verbal abuse.
[JOE] "It loosened thusly
whilst Sir Kiyoshi
was pounding me in
the dookie-chute."
[SHINGO]
Stop it, dude!
Madam Vice President,
will that be all?
That shed isn't
going to fix itself.
[MEIKO]
Go ahead.
And cram a cork in his ass
if you think it'll help.
Who needs a cork when
there's Kiyoshi's junk?
[SHINGO]
Dude, shut up!
What's with you
dickheads anyway?!
You're standing around laughing
while your buddy
gets torn apart!
Sorry, bro. Joe made me laugh.
Calm down.
I'm sorry. [coughs]
Pay it no mind, Sir Kiyoshi.
I've prepared
myself for this.
[CHAIRMAN]
How ludicrous.
I can't believe how
weak-willed I am.
Old fool!
I bid those sweet, swarthy
behinds adios once and for all,
yet I've dug them back up.
[CHAIRMAN] But this time, I
swear, things will be different.
I'll properly seal the
lot of them away forever.
As an educator
as a father
a line must be drawn
now!
Those jerks!
They have no idea
what it really meant
when you crapped your pants.
I'd expected a
negative reaction,
but being berated for befouling
myself is quite onerous.
[KIYOSHI] Gakuto,
I will not let the poop sound
you sacrificed so
much for be wasted.
I'm breaking out of here.
That's exactly what
I needed to hear.
Let's endeavor to make
this breakout a success!
[CHAIRMAN]
I'm sorry.
It seems the idea of merely
burying you in the earth
won't keep me from
digging you back up.
This time I mean it.
Adios.
On the day of the mission,
we won't be at the shed.
We'll be at the restroom
adjacent to the field,
watching belongings.
When the bell chimes at noon,
you'll enter the drainage
channel behind the restroom.
And from there, you'll
make for the shed.
Then, you slip out the hole
in the wall and into freedom.
[GAKUTO]
You'll have 15 minutes.
Then I make for
the train station
and head to the
Civic Gymnasium where
I'll rendezvous with Chiyo by
the time the clock strikes one.
You'll spend half an hour
watching sumo with Chiyo,
then leave for Akihabara.
There, you'll grab the
figurines for yours truly.
If you board the train
just after 2 o'clock,
that puts you back
here by three.
[KIYOSHI] Meanwhile,
back inside the school,
you'll trick the
patrolling Vice President
using the poop sound file you
worked so hard to prepare.
Absolute perfection.
Heads up.
I'm slipping through the hole
to double-check the
route to the train.
Right! Good thinking!
[KIYOSHI gasps]
It can't be No!
[CHAIRMAN]
I can't believe how quickly
the school's facilities
have deteriorated.
[SHINGO]
This curry's off the chain!
I know. I wish I
could get seconds.
[JOE coughs]
Nice burn.
You think they figured it out,
and the Underground
Student Council sealed it?
If that were the case,
they would have already
doled out the punishment.
The more likely answer is that
the school's staff filled it in.
So, what now?
If you had simply
checked the hole
before the cement hardened, you
could have just dug it back out,
and we wouldn't be in this mess.
Hold the phone, you
can't seriously blame me
for the mysterious hole repair!
Sir Kiyoshi,
checking in on the status
of the hole was your obligation.
Fine.
Dump all the responsibility
on me, you awful bastard.
[GAKUTO]
You are correct.
Yours truly is undoubtedly
an awful man.
Not a man, but a foul beast.
I pooped my pants in public!
[BOYS gasp]
I shit my slacks and flushed
away three years of my life!
I put it all on
the line for this!
Now that I have no chance of
acquiring my
quadrennial figurines.
I've sacrificed a grand
total of seven years!
No I'm pretty sure
your math is a bit off.
Stop being so blasé!
For what, nay, for whom did
yours truly stain his breeches?
[SHINGO]
It is Kiyoshi's fault.
[ANDRE]
Kiyoshi's junk's fault.
[JOE] Banged the clench
out of his bunghole.
Chill out, man. Keep it down!
I want my feces back, damn it!
[MEIKO]
Time to shut up!
What's with all the
racket during dinner?
Keep your mouths shut
unless you're eating.
[door slams]
Look, dudes, it's time to
end this lovers' quarrel.
Just stop! It isn't
like that at all, okay?
[JOE coughs]
Hey, look.
We know what's up, so
you can drop the act.
There's another reason
for all of this!
All right. What other
reason? Just tell us.
[KIYOSHI]
There's no way I can tell them.
[SHINGO]
Hey, Joe. Don't push him.
You're right.
He didn't mean anything by it.
You two will get nothing
but support from us.
[KIYOSHI]
Damn it! It isn't like that!
Yours truly wants his
feces back, damn it!
[GAKUTO sobs]
I can't believe it.
I pooped my pants.
I shat myself in public
[BOYS laughing]
Never seen Gakuto
looking so sad.
Should we talk with him?
No, don't.
This ain't our battle to fight.
What do you want?
You know, when you squeaked
that loaf out, I decided.
I'm gonna escape,
no matter what.
Don't you see? It's over.
Mine adolescence as well
as the plan to break out.
[KIYOSHI]
No, it's not over yet.
[GAKUTO] But with the
hole in the wall sealed,
escape is impossible!
Our entire plan hinged on it.
Now, everything we've
done has been for naught!
There is no longer enough time
for us to devise a new strategy.
[KIYOSHI]
There is a way.
[BOYS]
Huh?
I will become a girl!
[BOYS]
Whoa, sex change? What's next?!
[KIYOSHI] I thought
about it all last night.
I don't think
there's any other way.
I'll use the front gate.
[GAKUTO gasps]
You don't mean
When you say you'll
become a girl--
[KIYOSHI]
Yes
I'll dress up as a girl,
and walk proudly out
through the front.
That would be rash!
[KIYOSHI]
Yeah. I know it.
But then, it's the only way
we're gonna have a chance
at making this work.
And how do you propose we
procure a girl's uniform?
Well, this is a boarding school.
So that means a cleaning service
would come by every week
to get the laundry, right?
Precisely.
Their vehicle stops at
the dorm's back entrance,
just on the other
side of those tanks.
The day after tomorrow,
when the cleaners are working,
I'll sneak in and
hijack a girl's uniform.
The owner of the uniform won't
be wearing it over the weekend.
If I return it by Sunday,
they'll never know.
[GAKUTO]
Nevertheless--
Listen up!
This is the only chance we
have left for a breakout!
Do you still want your
Three Kingdoms figurines?!
Well, yes, but--
Then make up your mind!
We just have to wait for
the perfect time to act.
We can't let the
Underground Student Council
suspect anything.
Cocksnout! You didn't
stack this lumber properly!
[GAKUTO groans]
On your feet, already.
[GAKUTO groans]
Yes
I told you to get on
your feet now, Fignuts!
[spits]
I'm sorry, Madam--
Please forgive my boorishness!
[MEIKO]
You must want a beating!
[KIYOSHI] What the hell
is Gakuto thinking?
Dude! Why? I thought we
decided to lay low today?
Almost there
But it's still not quite
enough, as things stand.
[GAKUTO]
It's the president.
That's the only way!
Please, Madam Vice President!
I beseech you, please
forgive my indiscretions!
Looks like someone
hasn't had enough!
Now get back to work!
[yells]
--[GAKUTO yelps]
--[MEIKO] Hya!
[yells]
[GAKUTO yelps]
[CROWS squawk]
[KIYOSHI]
Next time on Prison School:
"Take Me Out to the Sumoland"