The Revenge Club (2025) s01e03 Episode Script

1
Welcome to
Divorce Support Circle.
So your best friend
stole your husband,
and now they're both
living in your house.
To revenge!
Has the solicitor not told you?
I'm going for sole custody.
She's turned my kid against me.
If Bex is willing
to lie and cheat at work,
how can she
be trusted as a parent?
That woman
you were with earlier,
might have been
just a teeny bit jealous.
Those exam papers are still
in your bag, aren't they?
That's Calum's Bex!
Charlie's leaving his wife.
He got headhunted last week.
Barcelona.
To your knowledge,
were there any drugs
being taken at the party?
-Not to my knowledge.
-Any violence?
Not to my knowledge.
How would you describe
your marriage?
Mrs. Jackson?
I'd like to invite you all
to share a secret.
Something you've never told
anyone else in the world.
To be utterly truthful
and authentic.
Now, hold on before you punch
me in the face and run to the door.
Hear me out, okay?
Because I'm going
to let you hide the truth
alongside two untruths.
So you get the experience
of being authentic,
but without the risk.
You split up into pairs,
and it's an exercise
Malcolm likes to call
The Underlying Truth.
It's time to hide the truth.
I was once on a reality show.
They cut me out in the edit.
Um
I'm not actually divorced.
Although I'd like to be.
I'm just too scared to tell Jack
I don't want to be
married to him anymore.
And now to think of the truth.
If I told you
my real truth, I'd have to
Eh?
Sometimes I feel like nobody
listens to anything I say.
Don't be daft.
I'm listening, all right?
This is me listening.
Okay?
So how about a couple of lies?
Why did you think
that one was a truth?
I don't.
Of course I don't.
I mean No, go again.
I'm listening.
I'm listening. Go ahead.
One
my parents prefer my ex to me.
She runs their kitchen.
Two,
if I told them to fire her
I don't think they would.
And three
they think she's
a better daughter
than I'll ever be a son.
Mate.
I think
they're all the same thing,
which makes that all true.
I'm not very good at lying.
Right.
Listen, Tej.
You can't take this lying down.
You've got to take what's yours
by right of conquest.
You've got to
storm the barricades,
vanquish the enemy,
and don't rest
till she's in your arms.
That's good.
-Is that what you'd do?
-Absolutely.
Are you still
living in a caravan
in front of the garden?
I've got it.
You you forgot your bottle.
Oh, thank you, Rita.
Mr. Forgetful.
Good session today. Really
interesting.
I'm glad to hear it.
See you next time.
Next time.
Calum.
You do the honors.
Be my pleasure.
And the Oscar goes to
Rachel.
What?
What? No!
What's my name doing in there?
You've as much right to revenge
as the rest of us.
No, I don't need a turn.
Look, Jack and I, we took a
leaf out of Gwyneth's teapot
and we consciously uncoupled.
So why are you here?
Because you have
to unpack the suitcase
before you can pack it again.
Look,
can you just give me these?
Right.
Okay, I'm gonna choose
a name of someone
whose ex actually
deserves it, okay?
Okay.
Rita.
It's, um
Ian, isn't it?
-Jim.
-Yeah, he's a barrister.
-Musician.
-Oh.
What would be a suitable
punishment for, uh
-Jim.
-Jim.
Electrocute him on stage.
Ooh, now
that is not outside
the realm of possibility.
I was joking, for Christ's sake.
Oh, okay then. Rita, what would
you like to do?
I would like to wipe
the pity off everyone's faces.
He's made a fool of himself.
Going after a girl half his age.
Everyone looks at me
like I'm the pathetic one.
I want him to feel
just an ounce
of what he's put me through.
That seems
slightly more plausible.
And less homicidal.
You see, electrocution
doesn't have to be fatal.
-Steve.
-It's just that it's an option.
That's all I'm saying.
We need to find a way
to humiliate him in public.
He's a six-year-old man who
fancies himself a rock star.
How hard could it be?
Rachel, wait.
-No, I can't, I've got
-Are you Wha
You want to get some ice cream?
No, thanks.
Listen, I'm I'm really sorry
about what happened with Bex,
but I'm fully done with her now.
Oh, that's great.
I'm really,
really happy for you.
Em, I'm sorry.
Em.
Oi, where are you going?
Whoo.
That's quite a statement piece.
What exactly is that saying?
Help?
Come here.
I want to show you something.
Sit down. Look at this.
Down and up.
-She's very pretty.
-Yeah, shh.
Last round now. Whoo!
When I'm done, I like to rewake.
-Rewake energy.
-Rewake energy.
Rewake sales
tripled after that clip.
-Nice.
-Yeah.
I asked her if
she'd do my Broska launch.
She said yes.
Oh, she'd take it to the next
level.
But I mean,
all the money's gone.
I mean, all that hard work.
She'd make it all worthwhile.
I'll talk to dad.
I'm sure I can get him
to put more money in.
That's why I'm lucky
I've got you.
You get me.
Jeez, Bella, did you
put enough salt on these?
Maybe a little too much.
.
I'm gonna have a heart attack.
Still looking after
your old man.
I hate Charlie.
He says I'm gonna have
to learn bloody Spanish.
Oi, language.
Look.
I'll let you into a secret.
You're not gonna need Spanish
because I'm not gonna let
Charlie take you to Spain.
I don't have to learn Spanish?
I'd never let anyone
take you away from me.
I don't have to learn Spanish.
I've got an appointment
with a solicitor
and he's going to make sure
you're not taken away from me.
But it's our secret for now, okay?
Top secret?
The tip-top of Tipperary Topest.
The Mount Everest
of secrets, all right?
-Now don't tell your mum.
-I won't.
-Yeah.
-Gracias.
-.
-Oi!
Okay, now mascara.
This is a good one.
What you want to do with this,
you should put that
right at the base
and then you give it a wiggle
and you go like that.
Swoop.
That way you don't get clumps.
Right, come here.
Do you know what?
Your lashes are so nice.
I don't think you need mascara.
Oh, hey, babe.
We're just trying outfits on
for your launch.
We want to look
our best for you.
What do you think, Dad?
She's a bit young for that.
So, what do you what do you
think of mine, then?
You're wearing that
to the launch?
Yeah, I thought you'd like this.
Yeah, it's a birthday.
Easier, folks.
You could get
yourself a personal shopper
or someone with a bit of style.
I think she looks lovely.
Yeah, well, fashion's never
really been your thing, has it?
Uh
Oh.
Babe, it's all right. Come
here.
Listen.
You don't have to compete
with the pretty girls.
Because they haven't got half
of what you've got.
Inside. That's what matters.
Like your mum.
Oh, here.
Clean yourself up.
Baby, baby, look at mummy.
Look at mummy.
You are beautiful, Lula.
So beautiful.
Okay?
Listen,
don't you ever let anyone,
anyone tell you
any differently, okay?
Good girl.
Lula, darling.
Can you give me
and Mummy a minute?
Thanks, darling.
Okay.
Why are you
turning her against me?
Jack, I wasn't. I wouldn't.
Oh, I mean, don't I
do enough for this family?
Yes, of course you do.
Careful.
Then why is she treating me
like a monster?
-She wasn't.
-She was. It hurts me.
Unless
Unless someone's been
putting ideas in her head.
No.
Look at me.
Rachel, look at me.
Sorry.
Wait, wait, wait.
He's coming.
It's fine. It's fine.
Go to your room.
Go to your room.
I can keep a secret.
Even though Jack's always on
at me for running my big mouth.
I told you,
I don't need to turn.
-Rachel.
-Oh, my God.
Emily, what are you doing here?
I just wanted to check
you're all right.
-Yes, I'm fine.
-Are you all right?
Yes, just get in the car.
Get in.
Oh, my God.
All right, there you go.
Thanks.
You want to talk about it?
-But if you just want to
-No, there's
there's nothing to say.
It's just
it's just a shitty old day.
Yeah. Not bad.
I like it with the
whipped cream and the little
mini marshmallows.
Sprinkles and stuff.
Do you
make it like that for the kids?
Rachel
I know you're still married.
How how do you
You don't have any war stories.
You're the unhappiest of us all.
And that's saying something.
Right.
Do the others
Just me.
Okay.
Oh, God.
You must think I'm a nutter.
No. Just
what are you doing
in a divorce therapy group?
Fake it till you make it.
Did he hurt you?
You won't get it.
He, um
He watches me.
If I screw up,
he makes me feel guilty.
If I don't magically know
what he means, he gets annoyed.
Oh, God, I sound ridiculous.
But then he
he says he loves me.
Gives me a hug.
Buys me sweet little presents.
You know
Maybe it's me. Maybe I'm
just
Maybe I'm just
shit at relationships.
"Why are you so thick?"
"Why are you so sensitive?"
"Do you have to make that noise?"
"Can I cover your face?"
You know
You know, sometimes
sometimes I wish
he'd just hit me instead.
Rachel
He thinks I'm nothing.
Because I am nothing.
Rachel, you are not nothing.
No, don't. Don't. Please.
You are so lovely.
Please don't be nice
to me because I swear
I'll never stop crying.
I do get it.
Dan?
My dad.
I'm sorry.
What are you gonna do?
Oh, I've
I've left him so many times.
You know, I lie there by him.
I tell his back
how much I hate him.
How tomorrow
I'm leaving him
and I'm never going back.
Then in the morning, I say,
"Oh, come on, Rach."
"Today will be different."
Only now it is different.
He's starting on my daughter.
My baby.
No.
No more.
So you lied to us?
-Don't start.
-But she did.
To our faces.
I I just
I just wanted a taste
of what it would feel like.
To
You know? To be free.
That wasn't even what it was
Tej. Not another word.
From anyone.
Go on, Rach.
Well, you know
Jack, he um
he acts like
he's this big success but
my dad, he's had
to bail him out of
every single business
he's ever had.
He's got a new one
launching this week.
Some exercise drink
with alcohol in it.
Yeah.
It's just a lawsuit
waiting to happen.
Yeah, he'll be on stage.
Camera's on him.
Well, if you want someone to
behave like a dick in public
-What's that?
-It's anxiolytic.
I was gonna suggest
using it on Jim.
I got it from my cousin.
He's a dentist.
Well, no offense, mate, but
if we're gonna do this
I think we're gonna
need something
a little bit stronger
than laughing gas.
No, no, no, hear me out. It's,
um they give it to patients
who are phobic about the dentist
because it neutralizes anxiety,
but it's a total disinhibitor.
Half a bottle of this
and people can't help doing
or saying whatever
it is they're feeling.
My cousin and his friends,
they give it to people
at staff parties
and apparently they make
a right fool of themselves.
Yeah, no.
It's pretty immature, really.
Spiking him
what if something goes wrong?
-What if he's allergic?
-I'll stab him.
With an EpiPen.
I always carry one about with me
because Sue's allergic to wasps.
-Oh.
-It's fine.
I can make sure every
fitness mag attends the launch.
We'll ruin him in a night.
Hang on, uh
Aren't we supposed
to be using this on my Jim?
Rita's right. It's her turn.
And I'm sorry, Rach,
but that was the protocol.
Yeah, and we'll get to her.
I promise.
But this needs doing and
there's a perfect opportunity
happening now, right, Rachel?
Um, well
Go on, then.
Might as well strike
while the ex is hot.
Game on.
Right.
There you go, love.
-There you go.
-Thank you.
Can I have a word?
Private.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
You do know if this backfires,
he'll come at her swinging?
Then, we'll make sure
it doesn't.
It's not like
you're doing it for her.
Oh, yeah?
Why am I doing it?
Because
I'll let you down.
Might come as a surprise to you,
but you haven't crossed my mind.
I didn't say
No, no, don't!
No, no, no!
-What?
-That's got anxiolytic in it.
What? Why?
We wanted to know if it smelt
or tasted any different.
-Does it?
-Well, obviously bloody not,
then I wouldn't have drunk it!
I don't believe this.
-How long's it last?
-Uh, I don't know.
-I'll time it.
-Yeah.
What do you mean you don't know?
We only put in a bit
to test it, so, uh
Oh, my God, I can't believe
this is happening.
-This is a nightmare.
-Oh, I'd be raging.
How long's it take to work?
It blocks higher cortical brain
function and reduces inhibition.
-How long?
-I don't know!
-I don't know.
-Don't know very much, do you?
Okay, calm down.
Calm down.
Just wait it out.
You'll be fine.
You're so angry with me.
But really,
you're angry with yourself.
I fucked up, all right?
Can you just forgive me?
Calum? She's not herself.
Planning on jumping
your bones tonight.
That answers your question?
-Definitely works, huh?
-Right, you.
-You leave her alone.
-Why?
You're safe with us.
I love you, Rachel.
Oh, I love you too, babe.
-Do you?
-Yes.
That's so nice.
I loved Dan
but he's marrying
Charlotte, so
What?
Why didn't you say?
So now, she's got everything.
She'll be Mrs. Marshall.
Oh, my God.
She even stole my name.
I feel like
I feel like
a victim of identity fraud.
I've lost
everything.
Everything that makes me me.
Emily, I'm
I'm so sorry.
I need to go.
Emily. Emily, wait. Wait.
Taking advantage of me
like that was really low.
How else am I ever going to
know what you're thinking?
Was I not clear when I said I
didn't want to sleep with you?
Except that's exactly what you
were planning on doing.
Yeah, well,
what I plan to do with you
before I let you know
is none of your business.
I miss you.
I'm nobody's second best, Calum.
Sweetheart, I know.
You said he was
going to move out months ago.
He told me he was.
He's there when I come home.
-He's there when I go to work.
-I understand.
I want him gone
as much as you do.
I'll go speak to him, okay?
-Now?
-Yeah, now.
Will that make you happy?
Come in.
Hiya, love.
-Um, there's something
-No, I'm glad you popped by.
Because I've been
meaning to tell you.
I went to see a flat yesterday.
And, um, you know, there's
quite a lot of applicants,
but I'm hoping
they're going to choose me.
-Oh, that's great.
-Yeah.
I am pleased.
Okay, well, um,
have a good evening.
All right.
Good night, love.
Good news.
He's found a flat.
He's gonna be
out of our hair soon enough.
Oh, thank God.
-That makes me so happy.
-Thank God.
I mean, he's harmless.
Ah, shall we crack open
the boozy?
What are you doing?
Yes, yes, yes, yes!
Oh, I love it.
Thank you, my love.
All right, fella. Stick
that right there, all right?
Let's get the Broska
sticking out, all right?
Mind your back, all right?
Bend your knees, mate.
Oh, you look gorgeous.
Love it.
You need a bit of help, darling?
Yeah, it's all right.
Ginger spice, I got it.
Here we are. Let's get you
strapped in for the night, hey?
Now, this is
how you tighten the straps.
-What the fuck are you doing?
-Ooh.
Sorry, babe. Sorry.
You're a feisty one, aren't you?
Right, let's get the music on.
Come on, we've got some dancers
ready to dance.
Boys, light, money shot.
Yeah!
No, not tonight.
I'm working.
Nice to see your face.
Come on, ah.
Man's Health, Runners World,
Health Club Management
and Workout.
-Can you believe it?
-Wow.
Four out of top five fitness
meetings in the entire country.
Babe.
You know,
this time tomorrow morning,
the whole world is going to be
talking about Jack Jackson.
-Sick, sick.
-Hey!
All right, bruv.
What you doin' mate?
Em, Tej, target approaching.
Good luck, Em.
You're right. We're shaking up
the protein industry.
All right, Rita, stand by.
-Hey, you.
-Hey, how you doing?
-Broska for the Broska team?
-I can't, I'm working.
Rita, intervene.
-I can't, I can't.
-Please could I have a selfie?
-For my social media.
-Yeah, of course.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll take it.
Broska.
How about
a little chug for the photo?
I can't.
I'm not drinking.
Calum, bring it home.
-Don't fuck it up.
-Oh, look. Who's this?
That is an absolute belt
of a snap.
Man's Health.
You don't mind, do you?
Of course, yeah, of course.
-All right, you ready?
-Yeah, please.
Can I see the drink in your
hand and point the Broska to me?
Yeah, of course, we've got
to get the Broska in, mate.
-I like your thinking.
-Good.
-Let me see you down it.
-I can't, I'm not drinking.
Ah, stop it. I can't.
No, not tonight.
-Come on, just one time.
-Ah, stop it. Fucking hell.
Go on, come on, Mr. Smoothie.
-Chug it, chug it, chug it.
-All right, all right.
-Great outfit, mate. Thank you.
-Cheers, mate.
Lovely to see you. Nice one.
Well played,
boys and girls. Well played.
All right, gang, now we wait.
Fuck.
I'm at the launch of a new
energy drink with a twist.
Here's its creator,
Jack Jackson.
Mr. Smoothie himself.
Jack Jackson, everybody.
So, tell us,
what makes Broska so special?
Well, basically, we've packed it
full of
industrial-grade alcohol.
What am I saying?
Looks like you've been
out of your own supply.
I'm fine, I'm fine,
I've only had the one.
What's come over me?
How you doing, darling?
You all right?
-Yeah, I'm good.
-Look at you in them shorts.
She doesn't need
much of the imagination, boys,
-does she?
-Oh!
Oy.
Isn't she gorgeous?
It's all right.
Jack, why did you
develop Broska?
Um, well, that's an easy one.
I wanted to make
some money, didn't I?
Jack, Jack, come on, babe.
Jack, don't chuck this up, babe.
Shit. Get off me!
Just leave me alone,
you annoying bitch!
Every time I try to do anything,
you're just bloody there!
Jack.
Shit.
Iron Crusher's blog.
Do you think
it's socially responsible
to put alcohol
in an exercise drink?
Oh, who bloody cares, mate?
Who cares?
I mean, you can't do
anything anymore, can you?
They're putting protein
in chocolate bars,
saying they've built muscles.
They're still full of sugar!
You've got to stop
treating people
like they're fucking idiots!
-Yeah, but isn't it also
-Look, mate, mate,
Broska is a cheeky little lift
when you don't want
your missus to know
you're having a fucking drink,
you know what I mean?
Here you go, bro, have a Broska!
Nice, that's what I need!
You like that, mate?
I do too, mate!
That's a nice idea, right?
What are you going to do
when your mate
wants a cheeky little lift, eh?
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska!
What about you lot?
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska!
Yeah.
Put the music back on, come on!
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska.
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska!
Have a Broska!
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska!
Here you go, bro!
Have a Broska!
He's had three offers
for international distribution.
I mean, Men's Health
made a swift exit,
but Loaded and FHM
want to bloody interview him.
We've made him a success
for fuck's sake.
And now,
everyone's coming back to ours.
Oh, God.
Hi guys,
I'm at the Broska after-party.
Let's fucking have it!
Who wants champagne?
We're not done yet,
but soon, I promise.
Babe, babe, we're all out.
Sort us out, yeah?
Ah, Joshy! Joshy!
How you doing, love?
You all right?
Oi, oi, give me four Broskas.
Someone's been drinking.
Grab him. Get him, get him.
One more, one more,
mate, come on!
How much did you give him?
He's off his face.
I don't think
it's the anxiolytic.
He's been drinking like a fish.
I need water. Mate, water.
Hey, don't push her!
-Oh, my God.
-Oh, fuck.
Oh, shit.
Put your phones away!
-Oh, my God.
-I'm gonna need a bigger towel.
It stinks.
Rachel? Where the fuck are you?
Oh, fuck.
Are we seriously letting him
get away Scott-free?
What were we supposed to do?
The plan didn't work.
No, but we can't just
wave the white flag
and close down a club just
because one mission failed.
-Did our best, Steve.
-No.
We all did our best for you.
-Steve, let it go.
-Just like we did for you.
I haven't had my turn yet.
I'm stuck in a caravan.
With nothing and nobody.
I want my revenge.
That prick's muscled in
on my wife.
I want him out of her life.
And I'm gonna need
all of you for that.
It took all of us
to spike Rachel's fella.
Oh, I fucking knew it.
Fuckin' fuck.
I knew it.
It's making sense now.
One of you lot
put something in my drink.
Of course.
The feisty bitch
who poured it for me.
Oh, don't talk to her like that.
Oh, look who it is.
Men's Health. Photographer.
Security. The fan.
Did you get
your little selfie, did ya?
Eh? And you, mate?
I don't know
who the fuck you are, mate.
Was this your little scheme,
was it?
Oy, was it?
You put my missus up in this.
You could've killed me,
you fucking psycho.
All right, back off, mate.
Fuck it.
Fuck.
That's enough!
Fuck.
I want a word
with my husband. Now.
Prick.
I want a divorce.
I mean it, Jack. I'm done.
Don't worry, I'll speak to Dad.
You'll get a payout.
I mean, let's face it.
You're not really in a position
to ask for anything, are ya?
I report what you've done
to the police,
you go to fucking
prison, darling.
You lose everything.
Your house.
-Kids.
-You won't get the kids, Jack.
I'm their mother.
The house isn't mine to give,
you know that.
Well, you're gonna have to
give me everything I want.
I'm coming for it all, sweetheart.
I've certainly earned it.
You can undermine me.
Intimidate me.
Bully me. Threaten me.
You can do
whatever you want to me.
But you will never
ever
tell our lovely
Innocent, sweet
perfect daughter
that she's not beautiful.
Ever again.
Now, do you understand me?
How you gonna stop me
from inside, eh?
I'll kill him.
-I'm gonna fucking kill him.
-Well, there's a queue.
I mean, that's ADH
at the very least, mate.
You should call the police.
They'll want a blood test.
That's a terrible idea.
What happened? Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine.
Steve, it's fine, honestly.
I've told him I want a divorce.
He said he's gonna
fight me all the way.
He's gonna call the police.
I'm gonna go to prison.
He's gonna get everything.
But he's not.
He's not. I'm gonna fight him
all the way.
I'm gonna get
rid of him forever.
Do you know what I say?
I say, "Bring it on."
It's scary, but I'm ready.
Phew.
Guys, this is good.
It's good. Steve, it's good.
Right, are we going?
Yeah, Uber's two minutes away.
-Where are the others?
-I haven't seen them.
-Ta-da.
-Oh. I love that.
-I hate that.
-Where'd you get it?
Well, he threw up on my shirt,
so I nicked one of his.
Suits you.
I couldn't find Rachel
to say goodbye.
Where are the others?
Shitting in Jack's bed, I hope.
Oh, nice. At last.
Give him a shout, Steve.
-See you, Steve.
-Bye, Tej.
What are you doing here?
Prep for next week.
You know, I shouldn't have to
come home to find you here,
especially when I'm not
when I'm not prepared for it.
I do work here.
You say that
like I'm in the wrong.
But it's not right
for you to divorce me
and stay married to my family.
What's gotten into you?
I'm tired
of being gas lit by you.
Pretending that this is normal
when, when it's not.
I want you gone.
What you did back there?
You mean when I spilled
my actual blood for you?
Yeah, that.
I just want you to know that
that was really stupid.
As long as you appreciate it.
Mrs. Jackson,
to your knowledge,
were there any drugs
being taken at the party?
Not to my knowledge.
-Any violence?
-Not to my knowledge.
How would you describe
your marriage?
Happy.
In your statement,
you said when you found Jack,
you jumped straight into
the pool to try and save him.
Is that correct?
Yes.