Government Cheese (2025) s01e04 Episode Script

1
- [piano playing]
- [patrons chattering]
- [piano stops]
- [chattering stops]
Come on, Moon.
[chattering continues]
Two beers, whiskey backs.
She's not welcome in this town.
Dirty bird feathers.
She got diseases.
The only diseases my people
have we got from you.
And this is an eagle feather.
Only bestowed on those
with strength and courage.
- I'd be careful if I were you.
- Hmm.
- [grunts]
- [bartender chuckles]
[patrons scream, clamor]
[groans]
[grunts]
[grunts]
[wind whistles]
- [indistinct chatter on radio]
- [radio crackles]
[radio host] The San Fernando Valley
Parks and Rec Department
has spotted its first eagle nest
since the species
was declared endangered last year.
Three nests have been located
in the Burro Flats area.
[prisoners chattering]
Fresh from my mother's kitchen.
She just left.
[in Tagalog] Did you know
that the invention of the yo-yo
dates back to 500 BCE?
- [chuckling]
- Yes, by the Greeks.
But we Filipinos perfected them.
[in English] All right, what's going on?
I told the class my dad was taking me
on a fishing trip.
Then when I changed my report,
the teacher asked me why.
And Joey Bradley, he yelled out,
"Because his dad's a jailbird."
The whole class laughed.
[Rudy] Ham.
Here.
What's this?
[Rudy] A feather is a special gift.
It's given to honor achievement,
or help navigate loss
or the feeling of being lost.
Now, the bird sees from above.
They see the world differently. Get it?
So, this will help with Joey Bradley?
What? No. Fuck Joey Bradley.
He's an asshole.
Look, I'm saying this will help you
with your family.
It's a reminder to look at things
from a different perspective.
Is it an eagle feather?
Nope, only the creator can give you
one of those.
If he wants you to have one,
he will set you on your path.
[wind whistles]
[Bootsy] Here's the specs
to the safe at the temple.
[Hampton] It's a Pershing.
Forty cubic foot interior. Level seven.
Two inch carbon steel and chromium alloy.
That's a 30 minute fire wall.
- You might as well be quoting scripture.
- [sighs]
It's all gibberish to me.
I'll need to drill
into the face of the lock
in order to reach the lever, or drive cam.
Then there's another two inches of steel.
In other words, it's gonna take 30 minutes
to drill this safe.
Can you shave ten minutes off of that?
The police patrol the
neighborhood regularly.
I can't say for sure until I test it.
I'm gonna need to get some chromium alloy.
I've got some concrete blocks
left over from when I was
building a decorative plant wall.
What happened?
The lady who inspired my botanist ways
replanted herself
in another man's apartment.
She said my trailer was too drafty.
Your trailer is drafty.
Why didn't you get a heater?
[scoffs] Too expensive.
- The heater?
- No, the lady.
As much as I'm enjoying this tête-à-tête,
I need to go.
Gotta get to the tool show with Manny.
I could get some chromium alloy there.
Sounds like you got it all worked out.
Now all you need is an alibi for Saturday.
I'll need a place to stay overnight.
I can't have Astoria catch me sneak out.
[neighbors speaking indistinctly]
And just where do you think you're going?
The Burro Flats.
Isn't that where those hippies are camping
out and doing that vision quest thing?
Don't know. They found eagle nests.
I really want to find a feather.
[Astoria] No. You are still in trouble
after that stunt you pulled at school.
Today I need you to clean out the washer
- and then clean out the dryer vent.
- Mom, please.
I'll do whatever you want later
but I-I-I can't miss this. It's important.
[Astoria] All you do is sit and sulk
in your room and talk about the Chumash.
You need to change your routine.
Harrison, how about
a little lakeside lounge at Lake Piru?
We can camp out, fish.
Nothing like a rod
and worm to bring family together.
No, I don't want to go fishing with you.
I think spending some time
with your father would be a good idea.
Take some time to think about it.
Not needed.
That boy.
[door opens]
You two are exactly alike.
That's why you keep butting heads.
[door closes]
Hey, Mr. Chambers.
You've got more hair than I imagined.
Most check forgers I know are bald.
Who are you?
Mini. I'm Einstein's girlfriend.
- You from the neighborhood?
- I'm from around.
Did you hear? We're building a pool.
- What?
- Yeah. Cool, right?
I studied the routines
of the last six gold medal winners
and they increased their speed
with two-hour a day practices in water.
But you work at a pool?
Due to the popularity
of the water ballet class
and the average age of that participant,
they need the pool heated to 84 degrees,
and I need mine colder
to maximize the benefits.
And I've never lived in a house
with a pool before so I'm super excited.
But you don't live here, right?
Metaphysically, we're all living
and we're all here.
[designer] Oh, God.
[chuckles] I'm so clumsy.
On my first day at Parsons,
I dropped my kit.
And as I was rushing
to pick everything up,
I stabbed myself
in the hand with my protractor.
Uh, went clean through. See?
Mmm. It's okay. It's a battle scar.
[laughs]
I'm sorry. I'm Caroline Purdy.
When I get nervous, I babble.
I have an interview
for the design associate position.
Oh. Your designs look good.
[chuckles] Thanks.
I I tried to edit it down
but, uh, I just couldn't.
My teacher said you wanna
leave them wanting more
but I just couldn't decide which ones.
- May I?
- Yeah.
Take these two out.
Now, I can see that you have an eye.
Thanks.
Um, I'm sorry, I didn't get your name.
Astoria.
- Thank you, Astoria.
- Just go through that door.
Cynthia will help you.
[exhales sharply] Thank you.
[phone ringing]
Yeah, I like that.
[typewriters clacking]
[Caroline] Look at this one. Is this
something that you might be interested in?
You know you can apply for that job.
And what if he says no?
I'm gonna have to sit here all day knowing
he thinks I'm just a receptionist.
He thinks you're just a receptionist now.
[Harrison groans]
[grunts]
[groans]
[Einstein] Now the trick is making sure
that the pressure remains even
otherwise it can cause a rupture.
Now that's the last thing we want because
Hey, where you going?
Mom wants you
to finish that before you leave.
I'm going to the Burro Flats.
I'd rather get in trouble later than miss
out on the chance at an eagle feather.
I want a feather.
[engine rumbles]
[Einstein chuckles]
[Mini laughing]
[Mini] Do you really think
you'll find an eagle feather?
Just need to search for it.
Rudy hasn't written me.
Dad's always in my face. Mom's mad at me.
- It's like everything's fucked up.
- [eagle shrieks]
Which
- [eagle shrieks]
- You hear that?
Which way?
You guys go east. I'll go west.
- [Manny] Okay.
- [Hampton] Right.
I just
I-I want to get the word out there.
[Manny] I wanna tell people
about the Bit Magician.
I wanna set up some tests, that's it.
[speaks indistinctly]
And build excitement, Manny.
Hampton, I haven't been excited
about anything since my sixth birthday.
These people, they're professionals.
They care about costs and facts.
[sighs]
There's not really anything
very exciting about machining.
That's where you're wrong.
Check out our self-sharpening drill gun.
The Bit Magician.
An approved vendor for Rocketcorp.
You look like a precision drill man.
This yours?
Yes it is.
Chambers, Hampton Chambers.
Inventor of the Bit Magician.
Now look how sharp these bits are.
And this is after hours of drilling.
What's it do?
[Manny] It's a self-sharpening drill gun.
Still in the research
and development phase,
but, uh, so far we've only tested it
on aluminum.
But we're working on other metal.
This small invention
is gonna change machining.
[snorts]
Self-sharpening. How's it work?
Ah, trade secret. But Rocketcorp loves it.
Can you demo it?
We can set up tests at any of your shops.
You just leave us a card.
- There you are.
- Thank you.
- Be in touch.
- Thank you, sir.
See, Manny, excitement is contagious.
Now, grab some more leads.
I'm gonna check out C.K. Metals.
[vendor] Can I help you?
Chromium alloy.
Extremely dense.
Do you have some samples I could take?
Too pricey.
What are you machining?
I'm a tool supplier for Rocketcorp.
Hmm.
Here's my card.
Give us a call if you need anything.
Thanks.
Manny. C.K. Metals has
all the exotics we need for testing.
We have no money for exotics.
Then barter. Trade something.
Come on, Mr. Rocketcorp, drop some names.
[sighs] Okay.
- Throw some weight around.
- Fine.
But you're buying lunch after this.
Hi. Manny Brinks.
Wondering what the wait time
is for your alloys?
Oh, we stock everything in-house.
From, uh, titanium,
chromium alloy to Teflon.
I'm an engineer at Rocketcorp.
We could bring you in,
show them your metals
[metal jangling]
[Manny] Hampton! What the hell?
I'm so sorry. S-Someone pushed me.
Sorry about that. Uh.
Um, just Let's Let's just leave it.
- [Hampton] Man.
- [metal rattles]
- Uh.
- [Hampton] All right.
Sorry. Sorry.
- Uh. Uh.
- Thank you.
- We need some
- Sorry.
exotic metals
for a new product we're doing.
In exchange, I think I could get you
on the vendor list at Rocketcorp.
And you're not gonna forget us. We're the
company that knocked over your display.
Um. We should go.
Someone's at our cart.
We'll be in touch, Pete.
Thank you. Sorry about that.
[sniffs]
[birds chirping]
[Einstein] Hmm.
Hey.
Hey, man.
Are you Jesus of Nazareth?
No. I'm Einstein of Chatsworth.
And who are you?
[chuckles]
I'm Stick Man.
[eagle shrieking]
[eagle shrieks]
[horse snorts, whinnies]
Hey! Get over here!
You're not in this shot,
you're in the next scene!
Okay.
There you go.
The headband isn't even a part
of Indian culture,
it's just, uh, used in the movies
to help the wig stay on.
Action!
[screaming]
[screaming]
[actors clamoring, grunting]
[assistant] Take two.
[all screaming, clamoring]
[actors clamoring, grunting]
[shrieking]
[muttering, groaning]
[prop master] It looks good.
Okay, I'm glad you
Okay. Thanks.
Okay, yeah, I'll hang on to it.
- [Gelsinger speaks indistinctly]
- [prop master] Okay. Yeah.
Sure. Yes. They absolutely had guns.
Yeah, we can bring
as many guns as you want.
Yeah, it's your call.
Hey! Hey! He's got the feather.
[panting]
[grunts] What the hell, kid? Come on.
[exclaims] Do you know
how hard these are to get?
[designer speaking indistinctly]
[exhales sharply] They're doing it again.
[inhales sharply]
What?
The room has no cohesion.
The color story is tragic.
- Astoria.
- Hmm?
They pay me to do billing,
so that's what I do.
I am too distracted
by their lack of creativity.
[chuckles]
[receptionist] Don't.
- What?
- You know what.
[whispers] I can't help it.
That does look better.
[muttering indistinctly]
[engine rumbling]
Harrison.
Changed your mind about fishing?
No.
"Harrison, Flying Falcon.
Here's a hawk feather.
The next level to your journey
and a map to the solstice."
Okay.
"Harrison,
Flying Falcon."
"Your father has really
changed.
You must forgive him."
How's the pool coming along?
I got a lot done with the help
of Mini and Stick Man.
Stick Man?
Oh, he's my spiritual brother.
- What's that?
- His creation.
We blessed it in an ancient ceremony
of spit and mud
and now it has mystical powers.
Good.
This is from Rudy.
I've been holding on to it. [sighs]
I know that was a shitty thing
for me to do.
But I was hoping I could be there
for you instead of him.
I can see that's not gonna happen now so,
um there you go.
Hampton.
Yeah?
When do you wanna go?
Leave Saturday afternoon,
come back Sunday.
Okay.
Okay.
[radio host] Now, I'm reminded
of the Heraclitus saying,
"No man ever steps
in the same river twice.
For it's not the same river
and he's not the same man."
Well, they called Heraclitus
"The Riddler" for a reason.
But isn't it heartening
to think that no matter what rocks
and rapids you're facing now,
if you keep going, there's always
a new vista waiting just around the bend.
Good night, San Fernando Valley.
And may tomorrow's river flow
as smoothly as our last song tonight.
[funk music playing]
[funk music stops]