Gilligan's Island (1964) s01e05 Episode Script

1
Just sit right back ♪
and you'll hear a tale ♪
a tale of a fateful trip ♪
that started from this tropic port ♪
aboard this tiny ship ♪
the mate was a mighty sailin' man ♪
the skipper brave and sure ♪
5 passengers set sail that day ♪
for a 3-hour tour ♪
a 3-hour tour ♪
[thunder]
The weather started getting rough ♪
the tiny ship was tossed ♪
if not for the courage
of the fearless crew ♪
the minnow would be lost ♪
the minnow would be lost ♪
the ship set ground on the shore ♪
of this uncharted desert isle ♪
with gilligan ♪
the skipper, too ♪
the millionaire ♪
and his wife ♪
the movie star ♪
and the rest ♪
are here on gilligan's isle ♪
Oh, it's real.
Oh!
Oh, it's got an engine
and wheels and wings
and a propeller and oh,
I've got to tell somebody!
Oh! Oh, boy!
[Clanging]
You stay right here! Don't go away!
Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
How are we doing, professor?
How are we doing?
Well, it's remarkable.
Yeah? Yeah? Yeah?
Well, considering the fact that this plane
must have landed here 25 or
30 years ago, it's remarkable.
But can we get it off the ground?
Well, I don't know. I'm not sure.
Oh, it's too bad I couldn't find
a brand-new plane that could fly.
With a great big powerful jet engine.
Yeah. With a great big powerful jet pilot.
You know something?
I believe this engine could be repaired
if I could fix the fuel line.
Then we're saved!
We can fly it out of here!
There's only one problem, gilligan.
None of us knows how to fly.
Well, we can learn,
because the skipper was
on an aircraft carrier.
Oh, a lot of good that'll
do us, gilligan. I was cook.
My roommate was a stewardess.
I knew a crop duster once in Kansas.
You see? With all that
experience, we can do it.
Gilligan, we haven't got
enough experience to fly a kite.
I'm afraid the skipper's
right. We could never do it.
We'd be better off salvaging
the parts of the plane.
Oh, well, it was a
peachy idea while it lasted.
See ya.
Oh, let's go fix dinner.
Cheer up, gilligan.
Professor, don't you
think it's worth a chance?
That's all you'd get, gilligan. One chance.
Professor, we've got one
chance. We've got to take it.
We've got to take it!
Now, come on, I'll clean off the tail gear,
gilligan, you get that cockpit clean.
Alright, I'll look at this instrument panel.
At the what? The instrument panel.
Oh. Cockpit.
Thurston, have you
any idea where we are?
Not the faintest.
[Yelling]
Over here!
Oh, yes.
I'm telling you, this is absolutely
Over there, over there.
Yes, yes. I heard the
I heard the sound.
Oh, thurston, this is ghastly!
Next time, we'll take a live-in guide.
Yes.
Say, this instrument panel
is in pretty good shape.
Good. Then our
chances are better, huh?
Oh, thurston!
Gilligan was absolutely right!
It is an airplane!
Obviously non-schedule. Let's go, lovey.
Gilligan: Look at this!
"The spirit of the Bronx."
The spirit of the Bronx.
The spirit of the Bronx!
Say, that was wrong
way feldman's plane.
That's right. The one he used
on his around the world trip.
Looks like more
half-way around the world.
Wrong way feldman, so
that's what's happened to him.
It seems like yesterday,
and it was really way back in the thirties.
I read all about him. He was a great pilot.
Not as far as ho well
aircraft was concerned.
We invested money in his first plane.
Yes, that was the one that went non-stop
from Chicago to New Orleans.
That was pretty good for those days.
He was supposed to fly to Minneapolis.
The fool flew the wrong way.
I guess that's how
he got his nickname, huh?
No. He got that during world war I.
He bombed his own airfield. Pow!
Regardless, he still did a lot for aviation.
And at least he was a pilot!
For my money, I wish
he was here right now.
Oh, I can still remember
him from the newsreels.
That jet-black hair and that slim waist
and that flying suit.
And that wonderful white scarf,
flying in the wind.
Aw, poor wrong way.
I wonder if there's a chance
he could have survived.
On the contrary,
wrong way feldman has gone
to the great hangar in the sky.
Knowing wrong way, it's
hard to tell which way he went.
I'll tell you where I went.
I'm right here.
Oh! I don't believe it!
Wrong way, you're alive?
Surprised, huh?
Well, but how did you
manage all these years?
Are you are you really
wrong way feldman?
Who else could I be?
I've been alone on this
island all these years.
And then I saw this young
fella nosing around my plane.
Oh, I'm gilligan, Mr. Feldman, sir.
You may call me wrong way.
Thank you. Thank you,
and this is Mrs. Howell
and the skipper and the professor
oh, madam, you are beautiful.
Gilligan: And that's Mr. Howell.
Certainly. It would be.
Come along, lovey.
You see, thurston's
just a little bit jealous.
I'm not jealous. I just don't want him
slobbering over those
expensive gloves. Come along.
Boy, stranded on the same
island with wrong way feldman.
We sure are lucky!
Oh, thank you, gilligan.
You're an amazing man.
How did you manage to
survive all these years?
Physical fitness, iron will,
perseverance, and 64 bottles of scotch.
Scotch?
Where did you get the scotch?
In with my provisions.
You know, I had everything.
I had food, gasoline, magazines
gasoline? You had gasoline?
Well, certainly.
Why didn't you fly out of here?
With that engine?
After the first 3 years,
I gave up trying to fix it.
That's hopeless.
Oh, wait a minute. Maybe it isn't.
With the spare parts
I salvaged from the boat,
I might be able to fix it.
You can fix a kreider-reichman? A kr-21?
Well, I'll certainly give it a try.
That's the spirit! You fix
her up, I'll fly her right out!
Mr. Wrong way, you're the best
thing that ever happened to us.
Just a minute now. There's
much work to be done.
That's right, men. We've
got much work to do.
Wrong way, the supply hut's this way.
Oh, alright.
Professor, this bolt's the wrong size.
See if there's some others
in the toolbox, will you?
Alright, skip.
Wrong way: Possibly, this papaya
punch is partly past its prime.
Well, it's hard to believe.
Planes without propellers
at 600 miles an hour?
And some go even faster.
Yes. I certainly must have missed a lot.
New planes and new inventions
and no more Rumble seats.
No more Liberty magazine.
And you missed the second world war.
The second one?
So that's what that was.
I always wondered what that noise was.
Do you remember the first world war?
Do I yes! I was an ace, my boy, an ace.
Oh, that was a big one.
No picnic up there.
Dodgin' them bullets.
Diving in and out in my Bristol scout.
Oh, and I met some
great pilots in them days.
You should have seen my
wing man bucky Lorenzo.
He was good, huh?
Good?!
They still talk about one flight he made.
He downed 3 German planes
and then strafed a railroad yard.
That sure is a great story.
He must have been decorated.
No. He was court-martialed.
Why?
It was 3 years after the war was over.
Poor bucky. He certainly
upset the president.
It's no good, professor.
These bolts just aren't usable.
I've got an idea.
I've got some rusty bolts here.
Have you got any
penetrating oil, wrong way?
Penetrating oil? Oh, certainly.
With my provisions.
Good. Let's go get it.
With luck, we should be
through here in a couple of hours.
Oh, luck that's something
everybody can use one time or another.
I remember once, the
3 heinies come at me
gilligan! Would you mind
coming here a moment?
Hey, skipper, can't I go with wrong way?
Don't you want to help me, little buddy?
Oh, yes, sir.
Thanks a lot, gilligan.
Now, would you mind
checking that rear wheel?
I think it's loose.
Yes, sir.
I'll lift the tail.
Well?
Yeah, it's a little loose.
How loose?
Uh
this loose.
Gilligan, get something to
put under the tail of the plane
so we can put the wheel back on!
I'll get that rock over there.
I can't move it, skipper.
Would you like me to help you, gilligan?
Yeah, that's a good idea.
Oh, gilligan!
Hurry up! It's slipping!
It's beginning to sl
put it down now, gilligan.
Oh!
It's resting on the ground.
Gilligan, do you think it's on the ground?
It's on my foot!
Lift!
Skipper! Skipper!
[Snoring]
Wrong way?
Wrong way?
Wrong way! Huh?
Oh.
Is there room for me?
No. Don't you have
a hammock of your own?
Wrong way, I meant on the plane.
Can you take me with you on the plane?
No. It's a one-seater.
Well I'll sit on your lap.
Then I won't be able
to see where I'm going.
Well, you can sit on my lap.
Oh, my feet won't touch the pedals.
Oh, please, wrong way,
I've just got to get back to Hollywood.
If I don't get back to Hollywood soon,
my career will be ruined.
Please, wrong way.
I can promise you glamorous evenings
Moonlit nights
Just you and me.
[Snoring]
Think it over, wrong way.
Wrong way!
Forget the moonlight nights.
You ain't going with me.
"Moonlight nights"?
I'm here to make you
a business proposition.
Look, you take me with you on the plane,
and I'll make you vice president
of ho well aircraft corporation.
We're on the big board and you Eh?
I'll make you president
with stock options.
Chairman of the board
with fringe benefits.
Wrong way, I've got to get off this island.
If I don't, the ho well empire will crumble.
It'll one final offer, wrong way.
I'll give you half interest
of everything I've got,
my industries, my
I'll even give you my
my very own Teddy bear.
Eh?
[Snoring]
A man makes a fair offer and thieving
[Muttering]
Apple pie order!
Beautiful!
Dirt.
You stand by, gilligan.
Yes, sir.
Professor, you've done a great job.
I'm quite satisfied.
Well, thank you, wrong way.
Everyone's worked very hard.
Bless you all.
Wrong way?
Huh?
Good luck.
Well, Lindy had sandwiches!
Wrong way!
Remember, fringe benefits.
Come back for you know who.
Oh, when you get to Kansas,
would you call my uncle
George and aunt Martha, please?
Oh, and when you get to Hollywood,
would you call my agent and his wife?
Whoever he's married to this week?
Please, please!
I want you all to understand,
we ain't any more important
than any one of you.
Although I'll be up there risking my life
Still, it's the team that counts.
Alright, clear the runway!
Gilligan? Yes, sir?
Rudder?
Check.
Left wing flap?
Check.
Check. Right wing flap?
Stand by!
Standing by.
Contact!
[Engine backfires]
Gilligan? Yes, sir?
Standing by. Stand by.
Alright, everybody, clear the runway!
Contact!
Contact!
[Engine sputters]
Yay! Yay!
Ah, bravo!
I'm taking her straight up!
Yay! Yay! Yay!
Wrong way, are you alright?
Gilligan, cut the motor!
Yes, sir!
First sign of trouble and he bails out.
Look at that!
I wouldn't have had
no control of the plane!
You're right! Somebody's
tampered with this strut,
and it was no accident.
What do you mean?
Somebody sabotaged this plane.
Yeah, and they cut the strut, too.
This is nonsense. Who'd
want to wreck the plane?
Maybe there's someone else on
this island we don't know about.
Maybe one of you isn't so
anxious to have me fly for help.
Oh, wrong way, don't be silly.
We all want to be rescued.
And soon. I'm practically
all out of mascara.
Nobody's more anxious
to be rescued than we are.
That's right. We told our
chauffeur to keep the motor going.
Well, somebody sabotaged this plane.
And cut the strut.
Couple of more minutes,
I could have been killed.
Well, from now on, we're
not taking any more chances.
We men will stand a 24-hour
guard around the plane.
Hear, hear.
Not you.
Gilligan, there are no
more bullets for the gun,
so use this bow and arrow for protection.
Don't worry, skipper, I'll guard the plane.
There, you see?
Now, that's for protection.
Yeah.
Don't let anyone near the plane,
'cause we don't know who
wrecked it. Not anyone at all.
Okay.
Okay? Yeah.
I'll relieve you in a couple
of hours, little buddy.
Yes, sir.
[Whistling]
[Rustling]
Who's there?
Me.
Who's me?
It's me.
Stay where you are, me.
How do I know it's you?
Alright, it's not me.
It's the count of monte Cristo.
I knew it!
Oh, gilligan, it's the skipper!
I forgot my lantern.
Say something the skipper would say.
Put down that bow and arrow, you idiot,
or I'll break you in half!
That's the skipper, alright.
Oh!
Oh!
I wonder where wrong way is.
He said he wanted to test the engine.
Well, you know how he is.
With his sense of direction,
if he started for the plane,
he might have walked
straight into the ocean.
I'm getting worried. Gilligan
went after him 20 minutes ago.
Skipper? Skipper?
What is it, gilligan? Wrong way's gone.
Gone? What are you talking about?
His hut's a mess. Everything's
broken up and thrown around.
I thought maybe he's
a restless sleeper, but
are you sure?
He must have put up an awful fight.
Yeah, but against what?
Yeah, against what?
I don't know,
but, look, here's his scarf.
We've got to spread out
and comb the island.
Professor, you take that direction,
gilligan, you'll go to
the back of the island,
and I'll go out to the ocean, alright?
Oh!
Gilligan, for goodness sakes!
Aah! Aah!
Wrong way!
Wrong way!
Wrong way!
Boy, I sure am glad I found you!
Where are the kidnappers, huh?
There ain't no kidnappers.
No kidnappers?
It was a hoax.
You were kidnapped by a hoax?
Can't you understand, gilligan?
I am a coward.
What?
Sure. I'm the one who
sabotaged that plane.
I loosened the propeller, I cut the struts.
After all these years, I
just couldn't fly that plane.
Oh, I'm washed up. Through.
Gilligan, I am grounding myself.
The way you were talking,
we all thought you wanted to fly.
It was just a front for a man
who's lost his confidence.
It would have been better
if I'd remained lost to the world
since I ain't got nothing left to give it.
What about me?
You can teach me to fly,
and I can take that plane out of here.
You fly the spirit of the Bronx?
Sure.
Handle a kreider-reichman kr-21?
With you teaching me,
I can handle a kr
kreider-reichman.
I can handle it.
Gilligan, I always fly the wrong way.
That's okay. You point
me in one direction,
and I'll go in the other.
That just might work.
At least it'd be a chance
to save them people.
We'll get started right away.
I'll go tell the others.
You'll do nothing of the kind.
You'll stay right here.
Them are the conditions that prevail.
As far as they're concerned,
you're going to rescue them, gilligan,
and wrong way feldman
will remain lost to the world,
a legend in his own time.
Wrong way, you're quite a guy,
and whether you think so or not,
you deserve these wings.
[Snoring]
[Birds caws]
Who goes there?
My turn to
oh!
Stand watch, skipper.
Professor, ha ha ha.
Well, all's well so far.
Gilligan will be here
at 6:00 to relieve you.
Well, he's supposed to,
but then you never know
what gilligan will do.
Yeah, I know.
Thanks.
Goodnight, skip.
Goodnight.
Alright, 1, 2, 3, 4.
We go through it again.
The banana is the oil pressure,
the coconut is the altitude,
the pineapple is the speed Gauge,
the papaya's the ignition.
You got to keep your eyes
on the instruments at all times.
Alright. Now get ready for takeoff.
First thing you do, you flip on the ignition.
No! No! That's the altitude.
I'm supposed to turn on the
papaya instead of the coconut.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Alright, now what's
the second thing you do?
No, no, no. What are you doing?
My foot's asleep.
Alright, 1, 2, 3, 4.
We try it again.
You are flying at an
altitude of 30,000 feet.
Suddenly, you encounter
headwinds of 80 miles an hour.
Show me what you do.
No, no. You're looping now.
Now you're in a power dive.
Now you're in a tailspin.
Look out! You're going to crash!
You're going to crash!
Crash?
Yeah!
Goodnight! Goodnight!
What'd you do that for?
I don't think that plane's too safe.
Good morning, professor.
I'll stand guard now.
Oh, thanks, gilligan.
I'll go wake up the skipper.
Now that it's getting light,
we can start looking
for wrong way again.
Right.
Psst. Psst! Hey, wrong way.
Gilligan, are you sure you
want to go through with this?
Of course.
Alright, have you got everything straight?
On the takeoff, what
do you do with the flaps?
Put them down.
No. That's the throttle you put down.
I thought that was the brakes.
No. You got to pay attention.
You got a very short runway here.
You got to clear them trees.
Oh, don't worry about them trees.
Off I go into the wild blue yonder.
Never mind the wild blue yonder.
Just clear them trees.
Alright.
Okay, now, first, check the instruments.
Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
What? What's the matter?
I can't fly this plane.
There's no fruit in here.
I know what I'll do.
I got a great idea.
I'll go get a pineapple,
a papaya, and a coconut
gilligan!
I've got the bananas.
[Airplane motor]
You heard it, skipper.
It had to be our plane that took off.
Wrong way wouldn't leave
without telling us.
Getting so a man can't
get any sleep around here.
Well, if it's true,
I'm going to start packing
right after breakfast.
I can't believe it.
Gilligan would have told us.
Gilligan!
Gilligan, little buddy, are you alright?
What happened?
I tried to stop him.
Is that wrong way up there?
Of course it is. Can't you tell?
Gilligan, what happened?
Oh, it's a long story, skipper.
But there goes the bravest
man I've ever known
Next to you.
Announcer: And New York is
welcoming wrong way feldman
with its greatest ticker-tape parade
in honor of the most remarkable
'round-the-world flight in history,
33 1/2 years from the day
he left the Bronx.
Wrong way has told the
authorities a strange story
of a deserted island
with a group of castaways
who helped him fix his plane,
and the authorities
have made every effort
to investigate this possibility.
Unfortunately, wrong way's
calculations are so confused,
the mysterious island
could be located anywhere
between the bay of Naples
and the arctic ocean.
Considering wrong way's past reputation,
this is obviously another fantastic tale
created from wrong way's
vivid imagination.
In any event,
wrong way feldman is one
of aviation's great heroes,
and he will long be
remembered for the great heritage
he leaves us.
Our great hero didn't leave us much.
Oh, yes, he did.
I got his wings.
Now this is the tale of our castaways ♪
they're here for a long, long time ♪
they'll have to make the best of things ♪
it's an uphill climb ♪
the first mate and his skipper, too ♪
will do their very best ♪
to make the others comfortable ♪
in their tropic island nest ♪
no phones, no lights ♪
no motorcars ♪
not a single luxury ♪
like Robinson crusoe ♪
it's primitive as can be ♪
so join us here each week, my friends ♪
you're sure to get a smile ♪
for 7 stranded castaways ♪
here on gilligan's isle ♪