Prison School (2015) s01e05 Episode Script

[MEIKO]
I won't ask you again, Kiyoshi.
Step out of that
stall immediately.
[GAKUTO gulps]
This is no time for pocket
pool, Filthy Four-Eyes!
[GAKUTO]
I have an itch!
[MEIKO]
So both your ass and your
--toolbox are filthy?!
--[GAKUTO] What this?!
When needed most, my defecation
sound refuses to play?
[MEIKO]
Still nothing, huh?
Well in that case
I'll just do this!
--[GAKUTO] It's over!
--[SHINGO gasps]
You're kidding me.
[sobs]
[MEIKO] If you're in there,
then answer me!
Sorry. I'm sorry.
Damn, do your hemorrhoids
really hurt so bad
they make you cry?
Weeping on the toilet?
That is pathetic.
Get back to your
post immediately!
[SHINGO] You've been sitting
on the can for too long, bro.
You gotta get back to work.
[KIYOSHI]
I'm sorry Shingo.
Sir Kiyoshi
[GAKUTO]
You
You made it back
in record time!
Yours truly couldn't help
but worry that you might
get so caught up in
watching the sumo matches
with the Lady Chiyo, thine
arrival would be delayed!
Whither dost thou
shed salt-tears?
Since you've completed your
mission and returned so soon,
you must have cut short
your sumo watching time.
--Is that your lament?
--No, Gakuto.
It went bad so bad.
It was an absolute failure.
Failure? What're you saying?
[KIYOSHI]
It got all screwed up.
You don't mean you've come
back here ten minutes early
because you failed to
acquire my figurines?
[GAKUTO]
The Three Kingdoms Fair
only comes once
every four years.
I've tarnished the next
three years of high school
by defecating in my trousers!
Do you really hold yours truly's
seven years in such low regard?
"It got all screwed up"
doesn't cut it!
Get your ass back out
there and buy them!
I did my part!
Where's my limited edition
Guan Yu and Red Hare?
Oh I bought your figurines.
They're still in the bag.
See?
[laughs]
Sir Kiyoshi, you really
shouldn't tease me like that!
Thy pranks really
had me worried.
Not exactly.
It's just that my date didn't--
We have to hurry back out!
They might still
suspect something!
I'll stash these away
here for the time being,
and return later
to reclaim them.
I have to admit,
you've impressed yours
truly, Sir Kiyoshi.
Those tears seemed authentic.
I never knew you
were a thespian!
Well, there's a reason
I'm back so soon.
--My date didn't--
--[MARI] Those shoes
[BOTH gasp]
It was you, wasn't it?
Did you enjoy yourself?
How was the sumo match?
I don't know what
you're talking about.
You were the one I stopped at
the front gate, weren't you?
With the bag on your back?
[KIYOSHI] No, ma'am. I've been
in the restroom the whole time.
You don't say?
If you've been in there
Care to explain this photo?
[KIYOSHI gasps]
[CHAIRMAN] "I'm watching sumo
matches with Kiyoshi right now!
Father, Sister,
thank you for giving Kiyoshi
permission to leave for the day.
It doesn't have anything
to do with sumo,
but I took this great picture,
so I'm sending it.
Note his nose and cheek.
Heart."
That boy is screwed!
You've got a lot of nerve,
playing my little sister like
that, you low life degenerate.
--[BOTH gasp]
--[KIYOSHI] Her sister?!
What're the odds?
[JOE coughs]
Yo. What's up?
Bro, everything is up.
[ANDRE] Did those
butt-pirates do something?
[MARI] Madam Vice President,
examine the contents of his bag.
[MEIKO]
Yes, ma'am.
Huh? Ugh!
I know these split ends.
Then you-- You used
Filthy Four-Eyes's hair!
No way If he--
--That means--
--Uh-huh.
Looks like somebody screwed us.
I don't know how or
where you managed to
get your hands on
a girl's uniform.
But beyond a shadow of a doubt,
you disguised yourself
as a girl to escape.
Is that correct?
[KIYOSHI]
Yes
[ANDRE] But escape means
that we're all held liable,
and our sentences are extended
another month, right, guys?
[JOE coughs]
That's balls! Seriously?
[MEIKO]
Mm?
Madam President!
This uniform!
It's your sister's!
[MARI gasps]
How dare you?
Sick freak.
[MEIKO] Today's work
is hereby suspended!
The four of you,
back to the prison!
Kiyoshi, you wait here
for further instructions!
And hope for a quick death!
[KIYOSHI gasps]
[SHINGO grunts]
[KIYOSHI groans]
[grunts]
You broke out of prison just
to go on a date with a girl?!
How selfish are you?!
What's wrong? Use up all your
talking points on your date?
[KIYOSHI]
Sorry.
I'll make you sorry!
Wait, Shingo! Cut it out!
--[STUDENT 5A] Whoa, what's up?
--[STUDENT 5B] A fight?
--That blonde guy punched him.
--What for?
Ugh! You went and got it on
with a girl on your own time,
and said "screw the rest of
those chumps," didn't ya?!
I'm sorry.
[JOE]
Kiyoshi, you're a real asshole.
[KIYOSHI cries]
[KIYOSHI groans]
[MEIKO] We'll be keeping you in
solitary confinement, Pig Boy.
Breaking out of here was
bad in and of itself,
but then you make a move on
the President's own sister?
They're gonna hang
you out to dry.
[KIYOSHI] I-- I don't know
how much more I can take.
[MEIKO]
What about the wig you made
from Filthy Four-eyes's hair.
Explain that.
Easy.
I took the hair you shaved off
Gakuto's head and used it.
[MEIKO] Oh? So you're saying
that Mister Brown Thunder
had nothing to do
with the breakout?
Right. Gakuto didn't have
anything to do with it.
I just told him I had to
really use the bathroom,
then I snuck out.
Then how do you explain
the sound of crapping I heard
when I walked into the restroom?
I don't know.
I must've still been
off-campus at the time.
Who knows? It could have been
any number of butts from school.
[MEIKO] So you continue to claim
that you were alone in this?
--[KIYOSHI] Yes.
--[MARI] Very well,
I have one more question.
Why did you decide to
steal Chiyo's uniform?
[KIYOSHI]
I didn't.
I just grabbed a random one.
I swear.
I needed a girl's
uniform for my plan,
but I didn't know it was hers.
You expect us to believe
this was all by coincidence?!
[knocking]
[sighs]
[MARI]
I'll come back later.
[MARI]
After much deliberation,
I have finally
come to a decision.
Kiyoshi, the accused
You acted alone
in your escape
And left campus, shirking
your bag-watching duty.
[KIYOSHI]
Yes.
[GAKUTO gasps]
Sir Kiyoshi.
You're accepting the
censure for this alone?
Like I warned you
in the beginning,
you are all liable
for any breakout.
That's why, except for Kiyoshi,
the four of you will
have your sentences
--extended by a month.
--[SHINGO] Tch.
Kiyoshi, you have been
charged with breaking out,
larceny, and illicit
sexual relations.
Your punishment is expulsion.
[BOYS gasp]
That's rough, man.
Straight up expulsion.
[coughs]
It's astounding.
[GAKUTO grunting]
This is despotism!
The Underground Student
Council was never given
the requisite authority to
expel Sir Kiyoshi like this!
Perhaps the Crow Master has
invested herself too heavily
in bird-law to recognize the
legalities of the human world!
I got no idea what
you're talking about.
[GAKUTO] I speak of malfeasance
by a kangaroo court!
Does your blasé attitude
mean you've no quarrel
with Sir Kiyoshi's
illegal banishment?!
I guess.
Such callous disregard.
You've known Sir Kiyoshi
since middle school,
longer than the rest of us.
How can you call
yourself his friend?
[SHINGO grunts]
If we're such great buds, why
didn't Kiyoshi bother telling me
--anything about the breakout?!
--[GAKUTO gasps]
No! He thought we
were gonna snitch
'cause we're too
scared to disobey!
Obviously, he thought
we weren't worth trusting.
Don't ya get it?
He doesn't consider
us his friends!
Shingo's right.
He doesn't trust us.
Yeah.
No, you're wrong.
It just isn't like him.
[SHINGO]
What's the deal?
Why do you keep making
excuses for that jerk-off?
Don't tell me you've been
helping him this whole time!
[GAKUTO]
No, just--
I'm trying to
think this through.
[laughs nervously]
Besides, why would I help?
A concern.
I understand your desire
for Kiyoshi's expulsion,
but we don't have
that kind of authority.
Decisions of this
nature can't be made
without extensive
committee review--
None of that is a problem,
I assure you.
--[CROW caws]
--[MEIKO gasps]
[grunts]
[yelps]
Is this?
But how?
Will he be willing
to fill it out?
[MARI]
We will make him.
Now go and bring
Kiyoshi back here.
[MEIKO]
Yes, ma'am. Immediately.
[KIYOSHI]
I've totally weirded out Chiyo,
and Shingo punched
me in the face.
Everything sucks and
the worst part is,
this whole mess is my fault.
The girl I like
thinks I'm gross,
and I can't face my friends.
I'm all alone
Leaving school might
actually be for the best.
[MAYUMI sighs]
Chiyo? Do you need anything?
--[stomach rumbles]
--[MAYUMI gasps] Uh
Let's get some food.
[STUDENTS chattering]
[CHIYO] So, I thought
about it all night,
and I think I'm partly to blame
for the way things ended up.
[MAYUMI]
How do you figure that?
I was so shocked that
Kiyoshi had my torn uniform,
I just decided on the spot that
he must've been some
kind of stalker creep.
[CHIYO]
But not bothering to ask why
and just leaving in
a hurry like I did
might not have been
the right thing.
I'm sure he must've had
a good reason for it.
That's one of my absolute
favorite things about you.
You were so pale when
you got back yesterday,
you looked like some
kind of zombie,
but after a good night's sleep,
you're shoveling down pork!
Was that supposed
to be a compliment?
--[MAYUMI laughs]
--[STUDENT 5E] Did you hear?
Yesterday, one of the
boys escaped the prison!
[STUDENT 5F]
I know!
I heard he dressed as a girl and
walked right out the front gate.
[STUDENT 5E] I wonder if
it's too late to transfer.
[STUDENT 5F] I hear the
boy's getting expelled!
[gasps] Expelled?!
[MEIKO]
Get up.
[knocking]
[MEIKO]
Pardon the interruption.
I've brought Kiyoshi, Madam.
[MARI] Fill in your
information, and sign it.
[KIYOSHI] So you're telling me
to choose to leave school?
[MARI]
That's correct.
But I thought you were
going to force me out--
You can bet your ball sack
we're going to get rid of you,
after everything you've done!
That's enough, Meiko.
There's no need to
resort to intimidation.
[MEIKO]
Yes, ma'am.
[MARI] This is for your
own good, after all.
W-What do you mean?
[MARI]
Come now.
Stories that you
stole a girl's uniform
to play dress up will
spread like wildfire.
[KIYOSHI grunts]
[MARI]
Think about it.
How will that affect
your social life?
Over three long years,
the entire student body will
treat you like a pariah.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
[MARI] As I said, this
is for your own good.
I think that rather than
staying at this school,
and being a total outcast,
you'd prefer to live
where no one knows of
your predilections.
A chance to start over.
Now, sign this.
Make the right decision
for once.
[KIYOSHI] The President's
right about everything.
There's no point in me
sticking around anymore.
But
[KIYOSHI]
I just wish
I wish I could clear things
up with Chiyo before I left.
[CHIYO]
What's the big idea, Sis?!
Why're you trying to make
Kiyoshi have to leave school?!
Hi, Chiyo.
Kiyoshi?
[gasps]
--Is that?
--[MARI] Chiyo
This meeting's private.
What are you trying to do,
kick him out just for
leaving school grounds?
And worse, forcing him to write
his own withdrawal request?!
You make me sound cruel.
Mister Kiyoshi here chose to
withdraw of his own accord.
This reprobate has been found
guilty of larceny and
illicit sexual conduct!
Thus, his expulsion
is warranted!
If it was elicit sexual conduct,
then that makes me guilty, too!
[MARI]
But you're the victim!
He coerced you into joining him.
You must have
Stockholm Syndrome.
You're so wrong!
I invited him!
[MARI] You're really
covering for the degenerate
who stole your uniform
and split your jacket open?
No, but I'm sure Kiyoshi
had a good reason.
Didn't you?
[CHIYO]
I'm sorry for what I did.
I was shocked.
So I said something
awful that I now regret.
I left without hearing
your side of it.
Chiyo, I swear.
It was coincidence.
I grabbed a uniform
for my escape.
But I never meant to take yours!
Enough lies!
Now pipe down!
[CHIYO]
Don't hit him, Meiko!
That's so mean!
[KIYOSHI]
Whoa!
Kiyoshi made a promise to go
to the sumo match with me,
that's why he broke out!
Which makes me guilty
too, doesn't it?
I already told you that
you were in the clear!
And you, get your head
off of my sister, now!
Well, in any case,
if Kiyoshi is dropping out,
then I'm dropping out too!
[KIYOSHI]
Huh?
Stop being so difficult!
[ALL gasp]
[MARI]
Enough of this nonsense!
Miss Chiyo, don't!
[CHIYO]
Let me go, Meiko!
Why do you insist
on being so stubborn
over this disgusting reprobate?
Kiyoshi isn't a reprobate!
I know because of what you said!
Anyone who likes crows
isn't a bad person!
He's the kind who
returns baby crows
that have fallen out of
the tree back to their nest!
Really, baby crows?
Him?
[MARI sighs]
I don't believe it.
I saw him do it!
I'm sure you must be mistaken.
Now, Kiyoshi.
Stop stalling and sign
this withdrawal form.
[KIYOSHI]
I, uh
I ain't signing that shit.
But you--
No, you have to!
I don't know what kind
of trouble's waiting,
but my future's at this school.
And one thing's certain.
I will prove you wrong.
To do that, I can't drop out!
You see? Kiyoshi's
been rehabilitated!
[MARI sighs]
[MARI]
Enough.
Take the prisoner
back to his cell.
[CHIYO]
One more thing.
If you try to get
rid of Kiyoshi again,
then I swear I'll turn this in.
[KIYOSHI] I got to clear
things up with Chiyo.
And she totally pulled
my face into her boobs.
Chiyo's boobs are
as soft as pillows.
Chiyo's boobs smelled
like lilac and berries.
Her left boob
and the right one.
Chiyo's boobs rule!
[KIYOSHI]
As of that moment,
any reason I had to leave
this school was gone!
[MARI] Anyone who likes
crows isn't a bad person.
[door slams]
[KIYOSHI]
Hey, guys. I'm back.
I somehow managed to get through
it without being expelled!
But I really wanna say,
"I'm sorry, you guys!"
[KIYOSHI]
Uh
Ah, well, good for you.
[KIYOSHI]
Thanks, Gakuto.
So what's for dinner?
Oh Well, uh
Huh? Seems my
dinner's gone AWOL.
I'll go get it.
Don't bother.
There isn't any left.
[KIYOSHI]
Uh
We were all under the
impression you got expelled,
so we decided to
split your dinner.
Sorry, "bro."
Oh. Right. That's cool.
We'll just count it
as part of my apology.
[laughs awkwardly]
You can have one
of yours truly's
golden-fried crispy nuggets!
Yeah? Thanks a lot man!
Hey! Thanks, bud.
Golden-fried crispy
nuggets are my favoritest!
You don't want
yours, I'll take it.
No, but I meant
for Kiyoshi
No worries, Gakuto.
Yummy!
[KIYOSHI sniffles]
[MEIKO]
Madam President,
are you sure we should leave
things with Kiyoshi as they are?
As they are?
[MEIKO] I mean, with
Kiyoshi still here at school.
[MARI]
Oh.
I refuse to rest until
we've gotten rid of him.
And not just Kiyoshi, but
all of those filthy boys.
[MEIKO]
Gakuto
As always, interested in nothing
else but the Three Kingdoms.
Joe
Preoccupied with his ant farm.
[MEIKO]
Andre
Hides a diary
under his mattress.
Huh?
[ANDRE]
"Today, I had a dream
where I licked the Vice
President's boots so clean,
I could comb my hair
in the reflection."
[MEIKO] Is he keeping
this for posterity?
Whatever.
Shingo
His cell is disordered.
Appears to be upset over
his sentence being extended.
[TEACHER]
In 645 Common Era,
Prince Naka-no-Oe and his
friend Nakatomi-no-Katamari
assassinated the
head of the Soga clan,
paving the way for the role
of the emperor of Japan.
--[KIYOSHI] A chunk of eraser?
--[TEACHER] The series
of changes that followed
are collectively known
by historians as
"the Taika Reforms."
Which changed much
of the national focus
from the cultural imports
--of the Northern Wei Dynasty
--[BOYS chuckling]
during the Asuka period and
segued into influences
Whoever's doing that,
cut it out already!
[GAKUTO]
Hm?
[TEACHER] which will
be more thoroughly covered
in next week's
art history lesson.
[KIYOSHI sighs]
Today's work detail will be
athletic storeroom maintenance,
as well as cleaning the restroom
adjacent to the field.
And one of the stall
doors is broken,
so that will need to
be repaired as well.
[BOYS]
Yes, ma'am!
Now, split into two
teams and get to work!
[BOYS]
Yes, ma'am!
Hey, Joe, Andre, how 'bout
we tackle that storeroom?
[BOTH grunt]
The tennis club's
practicing over there.
It should be pretty tasty.
Well, come on, Gakuto.
Let's go clean the restroom.
[GAKUTO]
Indeed.
[SHINGO]
Hey, Gakuto!
You come to the storeroom
with the rest of the dudes.
[BOTH gasp]
Come on! Sure, I could
clean the restroom myself,
but the door's gotta get fixed.
Gakuto, let's roll, bro.
[GAKUTO]
Uh
[KIYOSHI] Looks like they're
totally shutting me out.
[SHINGO] And I was like, "You
kiss your baby with that mouth?"
[ALL laugh]
[KIYOSHI]
Yeah, I brought it on myself,
but this is brutal.
It wasn't so long ago,
I wouldn't have been able
to get through this.
But now
I know I can do anything!
Titties!
Chiyo's cans were awesome.
They were so soft!
Now that I have
firsthand experience
of how soft and inviting
Chiyo's breasts are.
I can take anything
they throw at me!
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Oh, damn it.
Guess someone's in there.
The investigation
is going smoothly.
The prisoners suspect nothing.
[MARI]
Excellent work.
Please continue
looking into it.
You must discover their
weaknesses for our plan.
"Boys Expulsion Operation."
Which we'll codename
"Operation DTO."
Yes, ma'am.
[MEIKO gasps] "Operation Destroy
Testicles Operation"?
Unless the O doesn't
actually stand for operation?
Should I point that out to her?
[MARI]
Oh my
"Operation" is rather
redundant there, in hindsight.
How careless of me.
I'll rephrase.
For the sake of Codename "DTO."
[MEIKO]
Yes, ma'am!
[MEIKO]
That's the President for you!
She recognizes her own
mistakes immediately,
and she exhibits the strength
of character to correct it!
I am in complete awe of
the caliber of person she is.
[MARI]
Look at the time.
It's unlike her to be late.
She should have been
here six minutes ago.
You're right, as always.
[toilet flushes]
[HANA] What are you doing,
sitting by the toilet?
I-- I'm not doing
anything shady.
I came here to
clean the restroom,
but the stall was occupied,
so I'm waiting outside, instead.
[HANA scoffs] Well, that's
a job that fits you.
[gasps]
Hana?!
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Hana's back on the scene!
I heard that you'd
escaped from prison.
[KIYOSHI]
Well, uh, 'scuse me.
Need to clean the restroom, so.
[KIYOSHI] To run into
her here, of all places.
Why do you keep ignoring me?
[gasps]
[HANA]
Ugh! How rude!
Like I'm dirty or something!
It's not that! You startled me!
O-Of course I don't
think you're dirty.
Really?
You don't think
I'm dirty, Kiyoshi?
[KIYOSHI] Whoa! You're
kinda getting close here.
What's wrong?
You afraid I'm gonna get my
dirtiness on you or something?
No! That's not it!
Great! Then shut
up and prove it!
[KIYOSHI whimpers]
Prove it how?
[yelps]
Come on.
You haven't forgotten,
and neither have I.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Right.
I'm not an absolute monster,
so I won't do anything to you
worse than what you did to me.
[KIYOSHI gasps]
Whoa! Hang on.
You don't mean-- That?!
[HANA]
You said I'm not dirty, right?
[KIYOSHI]
Of course not.
I'd never dare to
call you dirty.
Honest.
[chuckles]
Terrific!
Then there won't be a problem!
See ya!
[sighs]
[HANA]
I'm in a bit of a rush today,
so you can thoroughly
prove it to me next time!
[KIYOSHI gasps] It's not
like I did it on purpose,
you blonde psycho!
This sucks balls!
[MARI]
Welcome back, Hana.
[chuckles]
[KIYOSHI]
Next time on Prison School:
"Vengeance is Hana's"