Dan Da Dan (2024) s01e06 Episode Script

[eerie music playing]
[Turbo Granny] His balls are
covered in a layer of my spiritual energy.
They're five centimeters across,
and gold and shiny.
You'll know 'em when you see 'em.
They're hard to miss.
I'm not seeing them anywhere.
This is insane!
We're never gonna find anything that tiny!
[Turbo Granny] You haven't
come across those suckers by now?
-They've probably been snatched already.
-What?
Them balls are chock-full
of a powerful life force now.
The kinda energy spirits and yōkai
are attracted to the most.
Evil spirits especially want
that kind of high-grade energy,
'cause they think it'll resurrect 'em.
That's why you always hear
about 'em attacking folks.
'Cause they're tryin'
to steal their life force.
That's bad news all around.
If someone's already got 'em,
we'll never find 'em.
[chuckles]
As far as I'm concerned,
that's your problem.
Huh?
-Well, now it's your problem too!
-Ow! Ow!
-'Cause you lost 'em!
-Get up and help us look!
Aah! You goddamn brats!
-That hurts! Ow! Stop it. Stop it!
-[Momo and Okarun yelling]
[gasps]
Ooh, you bastards.
I swear I'm not gonna forget this!
[Momo] Let's go back to my place.
-We need to strategize.
-Okay.
-[Seiko] Nothin'?
-No balls anywhere.
[Okarun grunts]
[Seiko] Ah, it'd help
if we had some idea where they dropped.
I'll ask around.
See if anyone's got any ball intel.
[Okarun] "Ball intel"?
Oh, and kid? It's great you got
Turbo Granny's powers in you.
But don't forget they're still her powers.
It might feel like
you got control over 'em now,
but they're still dangerous.
Remember that.
Stay outta trouble for now, okay?
[Okarun] Okay.
[clock chiming]
[buzz of voices]
-Ah!
-[Okarun yelps]
Dude. Yo. Are you and Ayase a thing?
[Okarun] Huh? Um, no. We're not dating.
No? For real? Interesting.
In that case, mind doin' me a solid
and introducin' us?
-Huh?
-Ayase's super cute, don't you think?
I've been wanting
to get to know her for a minute.
-[thinks] Miss Ayase is… cute?
-[magical chiming]
I never even considered it.
I was just happy I made my first friend.
Now that I think about it,
yeah, she is kinda cute.
-[gunshot]
-What am I thinking?
She's my friend!
Stop thinking she's cute, you jerk!
-It's impure!
-[boy] You guys have done it, right?
What?
Word is, she gets down and dirty
with anyone.
[Okarun] Wait. Who'd you hear that from?
Huh. Beats me, man. Does she, though?
-She does, doesn't she?
-[Okarun gasps]
Who started this rumor about her? [grunts]
Dude. You got a death wish or somethin'?
Let go. [gasps]
[Okarun] I wanna know
who started this rumor about her.
[yelps]
-F.Y.I, dude, Momo ain't that kinda girl.
-[whimpering]
Last chance. Who started this rumor?
-It… it wasn't me! I swear!
-[Okarun gasps]
I'm sorry, I'm sorry! [sobs]
-[panting]
-Are you okay, bro? Take it easy.
-[Okarun, whimpering] Sorry!
-[boy 3] Dude.
-Oh…
-[boy 1 gasps shakily]
-[boy 3] Oh.
-[boy 1] Uh…
PO
[Okarun thinks] Calm down, calm down!
[whimpering]
-[Turbo Granny] Hey.
-[Okarun gasps] Huh?
-[squeals]
-Havin' a hard time, are we?
[lively electronic music playing]
[Okarun grunts]
-[gasps]
-[Okarun whimpers]
[panting]
Uh… uh…
[sighs shakily]
[Turbo Granny] I ain't seen a school
in centuries.
How fancy-schmancy.
You! What the…
You're supposed to be at Miss Ayase's.
What are you doing here, damn it?
Seiko said, and I quote,
"You can go out, cat."
"It's not like
you can do anything anyway."
[Okarun thinks] Sounds like
something she'd say.
[Turbo Granny] You got bigger problems
than me, boy.
It's obvious my power's
a bit too much for you to handle.
But if you let me in your body again,
I can fix everything.
Don't worry.
Soon as I get my power back,
I'll leave ya, I promise.
-[grunting]
-It's an easy-peasy process.
Give me a break!
I'm not gonna fall for your tricks.
Give me back my balls and then we'll talk.
-[Momo] Okarun!
-[grunting]
[giggles maniacally]
-What you got there?
-[gasps]
-Oh, hi! Well, I sort of bumped into Turb…
-Shush. Quiet!
Uh…
…o Gran…
[boy] Ayase's super cute, don't you think?
-[gunshot]
-Su… super cute.
[light music playing]
Hey, wait! Where are you going?
What's your problem?
There's no problem at all, honest.
Then how about you turn and look at me?
I can't right now.
Hey, I wanna talk to you!
Why are you running away?
[growls]
-Stop running!
-[yelps] I'm not running!
[Momo] I'll kick your ass
when I catch you! Don't run!
Well, guess I'll snoop around the campus.
-See what I've been missin' all this time.
-[Okarun screaming]
[girl 2] Why ya look so pissed, Momo?
Did, like, somethin' happen
with the bae again?
He's avoiding me, for some stupid reason.
That's why I'm pissed off.
And he ain't my bae, damn it.
I think he's a good dude.
I know. Wait, what do you mean?
What's up?
-The folks in class C been yappin'.
-[Momo] Huh?
Like, he got into a fight
with some other dude for trash-talkin' ya.
Uh, for real?
Yep. I guess someone's been
spreadin' nasty rumors about ya.
Your boy found out,
and went off on some dude over it.
Then what's the deal with him avoiding me?
[Aira] I'm just way too pretty.
[students gasping]
[Aira] I can't walk down the halls
without getting stared at by everyone.
I'm not the typical cutie.
I smile and wave
at all the blockheads in my school.
'Cause if they think
they have a shot with a pretty girl,
that gives them a little bit of hope.
I'm beauty and kindness personified.
But even someone as perfect as I am
can get super upset sometimes.
So, in order to get back at that bitch,
I started a rumor she's a slut.
But it didn't get traction,
and now I'm more mad.
I'm the only one who knows.
She is definitely a demon.
I totally saw 'em, clear as day.
She had demon wings
sprouting from her back!
I see you now, Momo Ayase. You demon!
My sudden ability
to see evil incarnate is a gift.
Therefore, I must have been chosen.
Which makes sense, actually.
My beauty is angelic!
Why else would this drop from heaven
for me to find?
-[chimes]
-This golden ball!
I'm being told to go forth
and save this world from all evil.
[solemn music playing]
Very well. I shall.
It's my duty,
as a beautiful girl.
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
[rap lyrics in Japanese]
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
[chiming musically]
[Aira] Ow!
EPISODE SIX
A DANGEROUS WOMAN ARRIVES
Jeez! Stupid flippin'… What the heck?
A marble?
Hmm. Uh…
[shrieks]
-[ball clatters]
Huh?
[ball rolls]
[gasps]
[quiet, ominous music playing]
[gasps]
[girl] Aira!
Huh?
We found all the stuff you wanted.
We borrowed them, so be careful.
[Aira] Great.
Now I have everything I need.
[sniffs]
Uh, why does this smell like oil?
Is it a real crucifix?
I don't know. It looks real enough.
-You seriously going through with this?
-[Aira] Of course I am!
Because I'm so gorgeous,
I've been chosen by heaven.
I'm going to save the world from evil.
[both] Uh…
Well, you're my friend, so I believe you.
But you've been acting weird lately.
-This stuff's weird too.
-Mmm.
And whatever
you're planning on doing with it.
-[Aira gasps] Hold on!
-[both] Uh…
-[Aira] You see her?
-[both sigh]
You guys see the woman in the red dress?
[friend 2] Hmm?
[both friends] Uh…
No. There's no one on the field.
It's empty.
If you can't see her,
then she's a familiar!
And I bet Momo Ayase conjured her
to spy on us.
-Don't just stand there, get down.
-[both groan]
Stay out of sight, or she'll see you.
-[boy 1] Hey. What you doing down there?
-Uh…
-It's so darn hot today.
-[gasps]
-[Aira] I was just enjoying the cool wall.
-[both groan]
You're such a ditz, Shiratori!
-Hey, don't go calling me a ditz!
-[both laughing]
Everyone calls me that, and it's not true.
-[both friends] Faker.
-[boys] Huh?
WE'LL TAKE ACTION AFTER SCHOOL
DON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS!
[both] Mmm.
-[boy 1] That was kinda ditzy.
-[Aira] Sh.
-Not so loud.
-[boy 1] Yup. Still cute, though.
[slurping]
Hey.
-Yes?
-Turn around, so I can see ya.
No. I have to keep an eye on Turbo Granny
or she'll run away.
You couldn't catch me if I did, ya squirt.
You're supposed to be at home,
not hangin' with us.
[scoffs] Gimme one good reason
why I have to do what you tell me.
Uh, I beat your ass fair and square?
That does it! You wanna go?
-I'll murder ya. Hah!
-[Momo] Let's go right now.
-I'm right here. I'm standing here.
-[Okarun] Hey, Momo?
I'm worried about a creepy lady
Turbo Granny said she saw.
Go on. Ask her about it.
[seethes] So's you know,
I ain't been strollin' around
your stupid school doin' nothin'.
I've been lookin'
for them golden balls, ya idiot.
Oh, sure. Yeah, I totally believe
you're helping us now. Ya idiot!
[Turbo Granny] Say your goodbyes,
'cause you're dead.
Actually, they could be here.
I've been thinking,
and there's a possibility
a human found them
before a yōkai did.
Wouldn't surprise me if a human's got 'em.
[grunts]
They're all pretty and shiny and golden.
The problem is, if a human does got 'em,
they'd activate
the spiritual power in the human.
They'd be seein' spirits then.
And if they can see spirits,
that means spirits can see them.
They'd be in a whole lotta danger.
-[eerie music playing]
-Seriously?
Why didn't you say so before?
Tell me about this creepy chick you saw.
I don't know what she calls herself.
[chomps]
But after school,
I'll point her out to ya.
[Aira thinks] Momo Ayase!
I have no idea how powerful she is.
Will the cross
and holy book I have
be enough to defeat her?
She also has a familiar.
Can I fight both of them
at the same time?
[gasps] She's getting closer.
The woman in the red dress!
-[girl] Sorry, I…
-[Momo] Hey, Okarun.
-[boy] I totally…
-[Momo] Let's start lookin' around.
-Where's Granny at?
-[Okarun] My backpack.
[girl] … buy it. Look at it.
-[Aira] Momo Ayase.
-[both gasp]
I need to have a word with you.
Just you and I.
[boy] …after school?
Nope. Can't. Kinda busy right now.
It won't take long, I promise.
[Momo thinks] It's the chick
I dropped the washtub on.
Does she know it was me?
I don't wanna have drama later,
so I better go.
-Why don't you go on and start without me?
-[Okarun] What?
-I'll find you later!
-[Okarun] Huh?
'Kay…
[thinks] Oh man.
I don't know if I can do this on my own.
-[Turbo Granny] That's her.
-Huh?
[Momo] So, what did you wanna
talk to me about in a dump like this?
-[girls grunt]
-[Momo gasps]
[grunting]
Die, you demon!
Eww! Why does that smell like a gas can?
Shut up! Return to the pits of hell!
-[Momo struggling]
-She's fighting me.
Grab her legs and hold her down.
[Momo screams]
-Let me go, you scumbags!
-[both yelping]
[both scream]
Darn you. And your wings!
If the cross won't work, time for plan B.
-[Momo groaning]
-[Aira straining]
My gift from heaven!
My golden ball!
-Hah!
-[grunts]
[gasps] Wait…
You're the dumbass
who picked up his balls?
[Aira gasps] You know about this?
Well, it's mine, so there!
This ball was bestowed unto me
by all that is good and holy,
to save the world from evil!
Holy? That's Okarun's freakin' testicle!
Give it back!
Blasphemer! This ball is sacred!
-Shut your vulgar mouth!
-[Momo groans]
I'm telling you,
that's a gold-plated dude nut, you idiot!
-Get off me!
-Miss Ayase! I found her!
[Momo] Okarun!
You made it in the nick of time.
She's the one that got your balls.
Yo, she's the creepy lady!
He's your helper?
No, you got it all wrong.
She's not the creepy lady.
She's the one in danger here!
The creepy lady's after her!
[gasps]
[ghost] Finally, Aira! I have you back!
[whimpers]
[ghost] I've been waiting
and waiting for so long,
until you could see me again!
[child, echoing] Mommy.
[ghost] Your mommy's right here, love!
The familiar!
[shrieks]
[energetic music playing]
Get her, Okarun!
[Okarun] On it!
[cracking]
[power blasting]
[ghost] Silly boy.
Are you trying to take my little Aira?
Wait, you're a demon too?
[Okarun] Man, I hate this.
I wanna go home.
So bummed.
[grunts]
[ghost] You can't have her. She's mine!
[groans]
Okarun!
-Hey! Quit eating him!
-[ghost] Mmm! Mmm!
-[Okarun moans]
-Damn it!
[straining]
With my real hands tied,
I can't control my ghost hand.
-[grunts]
-[ghost roars]
[crashing]
Mmm!
-Mmm!
-[gurgling]
[gasps]
[ghost] We're together again, Aira.
For over ten years now,
I waited for you to see me.
Uh, you! Aren't you
Ayase's familiar? [yelps]
[ghost] Familiar? Are you crazy?
I'm your mother!
Have you any idea how much I love you?
When you were a little girl,
you called me "Mommy"!
-I was so happy.
-[Aira gasps]
I was never happier than I was that day.
-Call me "Mommy" again, please!
-[Aira gasps] Huh?
[ghost wails]
-Call me "Mommy"! Do it!
-[gasping]
[Momo] Hey, you!
-Give Okarun back.
-[ghost] Huh?
Didn't anyone tell ya
attacking the living's against the rules?
How about you shut your mouth?
We're having
an emotional reunion over here.
What's going on here, Ayase?
What is this thing?
Wait. If you're fighting it,
then it's your enemy.
Join forces with me,
and together, we can kill this demon.
I have no idea what you're talking about.
-[Turbo Granny groans] What a day.
-Uh… Huh?
I was close to bein'
that damn thing's dinner.
[Momo] Turbo Granny!
[tapping]
Uh-huh. That right there's
an Acrobatic Silky.
What are you doing with Muko's phone?
You're lookin' online
for info about this thing?
[Turbo Granny] Red dress,
acrobatic, silky hair.
She's an Acrobatic Silky all right.
[Momo] How can you not know she's a yōkai?
You're a yōkai!
I don't got time
to memorize all the rookie nobodies.
[Aira] I was chosen by heaven itself
because of my angelic beauty!
It's my duty to rid this world
of monsters like you!
Aira, dear, what did you say?
I said I kill monsters like you!
I'll bring peace to this--
[roars and gulps]
[gasps]
Hey, you big-ass goon!
What do you go around
eatin' everybody for?
You turned her against me.
Aira was good, until you came along
and made her a delinquent!
She called me a monster.
It's your fault she hates me!
Granny! Cut my hands loose! Hurry!
Can't. They're zip ties.
What are you talking about? Help me!
She just ate Okarun in one gulp.
I can't fight her by myself!
Maybe if you hadn't taken
my power away, I could help ya.
As it stands now, I can't.
Oh, come on, you…
[yelps]
Aah!
For starters, I want an apology.
Say you're sorry you made her hate me.
Say it. Now!
[groans]
Piss off.
[snarls]
[Momo yelps]
[Acrobatic Silky] My acrobatics will
whip you around like a tornado!
I can grab onto any and everything
and blow it away!
[Momo yelps]
Voilà!
-[choking]
-[Acrobatic Silky] Oh, you hopeless child.
I prefer Aira says it,
but if you really want to, I won't mind.
Go on, now. Call me "Mommy."
If you do, I'll forgive you.
-Well?
-[gasping]
I can't hear you.
Say it with me. Ready?
"I'm sorry, Mommy."
Come on, say it, you little brat!
Call me "Mommy."
-Say it.
-[choking]
Piss off.
[gulps]
[sloshing]
Where has my child gone off to?
[Turbo Granny] Oh, great. You ate her too.
Hey, ya pissant.
Give back them kids you swallowed now.
I'll let this slide if you do.
Who are you?
Can't you see I'm busy? Go away.
[Turbo Granny] Don't ya sass me, ya punk.
You best respect your elders.
Sounds like you have a death wish.
You know about manekineko?
They got themselves a knack
for summoning good fortune to 'em.
When you swallowed Momo,
some of your hair went with her.
[screams] Aah, it burns!
What's going on? My hair's on fire!
I can feel it in me, too!
What have you done to me, you filthy cat?
That thing the other girl had
wasn't no crucifix.
It was a lighter.
And either her or Momo
sittin' in your stomach sparked it up,
and set fire to your hair with it.
By co-inky-dink, you swallowed them
and the lighter with your hair.
But since I'm here now,
there's no such thing as co-inky-dinks.
[screeching]
[choking
[retches]
[Okarun] You almost burned us alive!
Talk about careless!
[Momo] What? Don't you call me careless!
You rushed in and got eaten first.
Anyway, now we're out.
Time to knock this bitch sideways!
[lively music playing]
[song in Japanese playing]
Any resemblance to actual persons
or organizations in this work of fiction
(Ken Takakura included) is coincidental.
[light music playing]
[Aira] I shall vanquish evil
and bring peace to the world.
[inaudible]
[Aira] Next time, "To a Kinder World."