Government Cheese (2025) s01e06 Episode Script

1
[Harrison groans]
- Morning, sleepyhead.
- [grunts]
Want some coffee?
[scoffs]
[owl hoots]
[Hampton] Oh.
[chuckles]
[shutter clicks]
[screeching]
[Hampton] Whoa.
You know owls are a bad omen.
It's a sign from the Creator.
He's warning you.
It's just an owl.
[chuckles]
We should get out on the water before the
sun's too high. Grab the fishing rods.
[sighs]
[in French] What's going on?
What's going on?
They put up a fence.
They put a lock on the gate.
We can't get to our water.
- You can't open it?
- [Felix] We don't have a key.
[sighs]
[both speaking French]
[chattering]
[Jacques speaks French]
[radio host, in English]
The drought continues to rage on
in Southern California
with farmers begging the state for help.
"Are you over the age of 18?"
I don't look it, but I am.
[both chuckling]
Lake rules. If you catch anything smaller
than that, you have to throw it back.
[chattering]
[Jean-Guy] What a surprise.
Harrison Chambers!
How are you?
Do I know you?
I was inside with your father.
I remember you from family day.
[chuckles] You must have gotten that
from Rudy.
Yeah, I did.
[inhales sharply]
Good man, Rudy.
Yeah.
Looking forward to seeing him
on the outside.
That would be
[speaks French]
Everything's in order.
I hear the fish are biting
up by Necktie Canyon.
Perfect! I'll head that way.
Jean-Guy.
[chuckles]
Harrison, uh tackle's in the car.
Take it down to the boat.
What's going on, Hampton?
Your son call you by your legal name?
I just need a second.
Just catching up on old times.
That's right. Old friends.
Remembering that time
Rudy made toilet wine
and your dad, Hampton [chuckles]
tried to teach us the waltz.
[chuckles]
How is Rudy?
He's fine.
Of course. He is fine.
Harrison, uh,
just give us a moment, please.
What are you doing here? You following me?
No.
No, I just Handling some farm business.
All right. I have your money.
I don't want the money.
I want your drill.
[whispers] But I have it.
[stutters] You can have it right now.
[inhales deeply]
I don't accept.
[laughing]
What the
- [grunts]
- [yells, groans]
[both grunt]
- Shit!
- Man! Get out of my net!
[grunting, groaning]
Get out of my net!
- [fisherman exclaims]
- [Hampton pants]
You're ruining the water.
[pants, groans]
Stealing the fish.
[spits]
Stop taking things that are not yours.
Hey, hey, hey! Hey!
That's mine! Give it to me.
[yelps]
[fisherman grunts]
[groans]
[both grunting]
- Give me my
- [grunts]
Give me my money!
[groans]
[fisherman panting]
[groans]
[panting]
[panting]
You can't run.
Go to Nineveh.
What?
Go to Nineveh.
[fisherman] Not this way.
That way.
[Hampton grunts]
[radio chattering]
[Prevost brothers speaking French]
[in English] Is there a key, Frida?
To the gate that has suddenly appeared
around our water supply.
I don't have one. State put up the fence
to stop people from stealing the water.
Only the Rangers have a key. New law.
Without that water,
our entire orange crop will die.
Nothing I can do. I don't have a key.
I'm sure there's something
you can tell us.
Uh, name of the Ranger
who has a key to the gate?
Where he lives?
His name is Hank.
I don't know where he lives.
He usually checks the meter
around this time.
See there, Frida?
What good can happen when we
put our heads together.
[Prevost brothers laugh, speak French]
[Jacques speaks French]
[Jean-Guy, in English]
Let's go get our water.
Why don't you grab those
and shimmy up that fence, Felix?
- Don't boss me around, you runt.
- Move over.
Pussies.
[Jean-Guy, Darius speak French]
[in English] Okay.
[water running]
[whistles]
What the hell do you think you're doing?
[Jean-Guy] Ah [speaks French] Hank.
I've heard so much about you
from our friend Frida.
What did you do to my lock?
Please, excuse our mess. [chuckles]
Your lock was coming between our water
and our oranges. We couldn't have that.
But I'm sure we can find something
that is beneficial for all of us.
[in French]
We're not negotiating with him.
Why not? He looks like a reasonable man.
- [radio chatters]
- Whoa.
- [Hank screams]
- [speaks French]
[groaning]
[Jacques, Felix speak French]
- [Jean-Guy speaks French]
- [Jacques] Make some room.
- [in English] Away, away.
- [groaning continues]
[Hampton] Now grab a piece of fish.
Perfect.
Okay, now really dig it in there.
Bury it in there. Okay.
Go over to that side.
Press, come back, let go.
That's it! Nice cast, son. [chuckles]
[exhales sharply] Not as good as mine.
Still rather fish the Chumash way.
What's with all the Chumash stuff?
What's with all your Yahweh stuff?
[scoffs]
Okay.
Hey, Harrison.
[shutter clicks]
Hey, come on. Stop with all the photos.
[laughing]
Why do you wish Rudy was out and not me?
I'm embarrassed by you.
Rudy has a cool history.
You got it all wrong, son.
You're trying to be something you're not
instead of being proud of who you are.
We're royalty.
We're not royalty.
Course we are.
And don't let anyone ever
tell you differently. Sir Harrison.
[chuckles]
Come on. What else is bothering you?
You always liked Einstein more.
Einstein this, Einstein that.
So what he won a yo-yo contest?
It's not like he got any money for it.
Maybe I'd have his brain
if I was dropped on my head.
Hey, watch your mouth.
That was an accident.
Look, I love you both equally.
But Einstein is more fun to be around.
And you
You're an asshole.
Now, if you can just ease up on me
a little
[whispers] The ranking can always change.
Maybe.
Look, if that's who you are,
I'll take whatever I can get,
but when we come out here on the lake,
let's just have fun.
Promise you won't get locked up again.
I will never ever do anything
to put myself in that position again.
Deal, Sir Hampton.
[chuckles] There it is.
[Hampton laughs]
Pull your line in. Pull your line in.
Whoa.
- Whoa.
- [reel whirs]
- [chuckles]
- I'm the king of the lake.
[grunts, exclaims]
Hampton!
[screaming, panting]
Oh, Lord. Lord.
Hampton!
Hampton!
- [coughing]
- [squelching]
Hampton!
Help!
I can see
I can see I've been on the wrong path.
Okay, I have. I have.
But I'm trying I'm trying
I'm just trying Just
[groans] Okay. I'm trying to get
on the right path.
Okay, that really hurts.
That really hurts!
- Ow! Ow, ow! Ow!
- [squelching]
[groaning]
[laughing, crying]
Please don't let me die! [shouts]
[screams] That hurts. [panting]
I understand. Just give me another chance.
I mean, we should be fine.
Especially if we keep it in the cooler.
My dad fell in the water.
I can't find him.
- Do you know where you were?
- Uh Um, Necktie Canyon.
- [dial tone]
- [sighs]
- [dials phone]
- [Danny] Hello. [sighs]
Yeah, there's a man missing
in the lake. Necktie. Okay.
Rangers are on their way.
[straining] Yahweh,
I promise I'll be good. I'll be good.
- Ow. [groaning, exclaiming]
- [squelching]
I'll give the money back! [spits] I swear.
[groaning]
[fish rumbling]
[gasping, spitting]
Harrison!
[coughs, groans]
[exclaims]
[Hampton coughing, panting]
[grunts]
[breathing heavily]
Hampton!
[coughing, panting]
[lighter clicks]
[whirring in the distance]
[owl hoots]
[panting]
[owl hoots]
[Hampton] Harrison.
[hoots]
[squawks]
[panting]
[sighs]
[sighs, sniffles]
[grunts]
[sighs]
[sniffles]
- [panting]
- [Harrison sniffles]
[Hampton] Harrison.
I'm alive! [chuckles]
Oh.
I'm sorry.
I made it.
[laughing]
- Shit.
- [sniffles]
You see me fall in that shit?
[laughing]
King of the lake! Oh!
Shit.
Shit.
[exclaims] Shit.
Oh, God. Where you going?
[inhales deeply] Where you
[exclaims]
Catfish.
[car approaching]
Hampton.
- [radio chatter]
- [car door shuts]
I understand there's a man missing.
Officer.
Uh There is?
Um, no.
[Harrison] Officer, th-there was.
It was him, my dad.
Oh Yeah. [chuckles]
I thought he drowned.
- [Hampton chuckles]
- He's safe now.
I'm safe now.
Have a good day.
Thank you, officer.
[telephone rings]
Chatsworth Police Department,
how can I help you?
I'm sorry, what?
There's something in your chimney?
Are you sure?
I know the call I made
to you last week was a false alarm.
But this is real.