House of Stassi (2026) s01e07 Episode Script

1
[dramatic classical music]
- Please do not remind me.
Who the [bleep]
ambushes somebody
while they're decorating
their Christmas tree?
- I'm gonna have to leave too,
in, like, 15 minutes.
- Yes.
Kris Jenner, please adopt me.
- Yes.
Thankfully,
we can all coexist again
and have fun.
I hate it
when my friends fight.
- Guys, it's girls' night!
- Uh, Katie is planning
Emo Nite.
But I'm not emo,
so I'm not going.
Beau is planning
a dodgeball game.
I will be going,
but I will not be playing.
And Georgi is hosting
a housewarming party.
However, I do not have
visibility on the guest list,
and that is
extremely concerning.
- Enough with the boat!
[laughter]
We're gonna get there!
[dramatic music]
♪
[refined music]
PERSON:
Gorgeous.
Hollywood royalty.
Beautiful.
You look amazing.
Give this girl her own show!
GEORGI: She's hot as [bleep].
That's what
I have to live up to.
PERSON: Yes!
PERSON: Beautiful.
PHOTOGRAPHER:
Love it.
- I'm at this huge mansion
doing my first interview
and photo shoot for this show
for Marie Claire.
PHOTOGRAPHER:
Aww. That's really sweet.
STASSI:
If I'm gonna have a comeback,
I want it to be
professionally lit.
GEORGI:
You look stunning.
STASSI:
Thank you.
It's all the glam.
GEORGI: Thank you
for letting me tag along.
STASSI: Your housewarming party
will be fun.
- Oh, Mom and Nikolai
are coming.
- Oh! Oh.
I did not know that
Georgi was planning on inviting
our mom to her housewarming.
I thought we managed
to get through Friendsgiving
relatively unscathed.
Mom, give me a break.
You've literally said
horrible shit to me.
- And so have you.
STASSI:
Mom makes me the enemy.
We're not in a good place.
I don't know why she would
set us up for another fight,
but I don't think
my sister cares
that my mom and I
struggle to coexist.
But it's not my party.
So if it gets ruined, oh, well.
Inviting her is batshit crazy.
- OK.
- Like,
I'm gonna shit my pants soon.
- Oh.
- It's OK.
I know Sound can hear it.
♪
[light music]
- Oh, man.
This is kind of a workout.
- I'm already starting
to feel the burn.
♪
STASSI: Happy housewarming.
GEORGI:
Today is gonna be great.
This is such a new beginning.
It's my first apartment
here in LA.
And I'm lucky
and grateful that Georgia
wants to even come along
so I'm not alone
for the first couple weeks.
It's actually really sweet.
- Happy home-warming.
- Thank you so much.
ROB: I got you this flower.
GEORGI: Thank you.
That's so kind.
STASSI: It's great
that Georgi wants to celebrate
and, like, host this barbecue.
But she's still finding
her footing here,
so all my friends are coming
and also my mom and my brother.
- It's so nice.
- Yeah. I'm so excited.
ROB:
Heyo! Hi, guys.
DAYNA:
Yeah.
We heard you're grilling.
ROB:
Yes.
- [bleep].
Even though
Thanksgiving went well, like,
I never know when,
like, the next fight is
between me and my mom.
And, like, I just don't want
that to be, like,
here at Georgi's housewarming.
[sighs]
I'm just gonna
have to ignore her.
DAYNA: I'm gonna go get
condiments and hamburger buns.
GEORGI:
OK.
- [Katie laughs]
- Whatever.
KATIE: I know where
you won't run into your mom.
Come to Emo Nite.
STASSI:
Katie, I can't go to Emo Nite.
And I'm very sorry.
KATIE:
I am disappointed
that Stassi's not coming
to Emo Nite
because I think
in rebuilding our friendship,
it's important to show up for
the things that are important.
And I know that children
and family might not hold
the same weight as Emo Nite,
but it's still something
that I really enjoy
and wanted to share with her.
The only, like, party I go to
once every six months
is Emo Nite.
- You know I can't go anywhere
at 10:30 at night.
- Don't say yes or no yet.
I really don't want
to make a big deal of this,
but this was
what I was worried about,
is that I'm gonna
show up for her,
and the minute I ask her
to show up for me
for something,
she's not gonna do it.
But it's just, like,
one of those things
where I was like, I really want
to share this with you.
- To go to listen
to emo music, though.
- Obviously,
I know it's not your thing.
But I want effort to be there
on both ends.
I think an older version
of Stassi
would demand and expect
everyone's support
and everyone to drop everything
and be there for her.
But I still think there's
a little bit of that in her.
But like,
if I'm gonna come and bring
any aspect of my life to this,
can you at least act
interested?
- Now I feel like
a big ol' dick.
- You are a big ol' dick.
- The question is,
where's the vodka?
[quirky music]
I heard there was vodka.
BEAU:
OK. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
MARCIANO:
I know you can handle it.
[laughs]
[upbeat music]
How did it go?
ROB: Did you work?
- I did.
My first day back at work
was really good.
And it is something that I was
like, OK, this is working.
This is something that is
getting me out of my head
and bringing a lot of light
into, you know, my thoughts
and my own just well-being.
All right.
Nice shoulder to shoulder
for me, please.
- Oh, we're doing this.
BEAU: Yeah.
I want to get
the slates from here.
PERSON: Cool.
- And great.
And, you know, I made it home
five minutes after Sonya left.
TEDDY: How was it?
- It was great.
It was great.
ROB: Was it?
TEDDY: I feel like
Stass is gonna see,
like, a change in your, like,
moo--like, daily mood.
- Were you able to talk to her
about it when you came home?
- Um, didn't talk to her yet.
[background chatter]
- Well, she should also ask,
how was--
like, how was it, you know?
- Yeah.
I know.
I'm not really surprised
that Stassi didn't ask
about my first day back.
To be honest, I don't know
if I would have wanted her to
just because I feel like
there would have been
a lot of, you know,
animosity towards it
when I told her
how great it was.
Then she's gonna be like,
"That's great,"
but I know that's not great.
So I think it's great
that she just didn't ask me,
because then it just
would have been like, lies.
TEDDY: Baby steps.
- Yeah.
Baby steps.
- Yeah.
ROB: That's what
it's all about, man.
- How are you doing?
- Good.
- Yeah?
- Up and downs.
But yeah.
- Yeah.
- We try to--
- No,
you guys are [bleep] insane.
- Ugh.
STASSI:
I don't know how
Georgia is living with Georgi
because it seems like
all they're doing is fighting.
It's kind of like, Georgia,
blink twice if you need help.
But I don't know.
She seems fine.
You guys are stuck now
in this family
that, like,
you have to figure it out--
- No.
I don't feel like--
- Unless Beau and I
were to get a divorce.
[quirky music]
- I just heard divorce and I'm
like, what--Beau and divorce.
GEORGIA: No.
It's nothing, it's nothing.
BEAU:
Are you joking?
Stass and I were both
children of divorce.
And we have very strong
feelings of not, you know,
going down the same route
as our parents.
And I don't like that.
I don't want to get divorced.
Ever.
GEORGIA:
Don't worry. It's nothing.
- Can I borrow you?
- Yeah.
What's up, girl?
- Just come with me.
- No. No. I'm scared.
- No, don't worry.
I love you.
No, it's good.
- Just totally off topic,
I wanted to find out
if any of you guys would be
down to do, like,
an open gym for dodgeball.
Back in, like, 2009,
I was playing kickball,
and then two of my gay
guy friends were like,
oh, you should come and sub
on our team for dodgeball.
And went there and it's like,
the short shorts.
Everyone's in, like,
fun costumes.
I was into it.
Some crazy team names,
like WWJD.
We all dressed as priests
and Catholic schoolgirls.
What Would Jesus Dodge.
- The one time I went
when we first started dating
because supportive girlfriend,
and I got hit in the face
on the sideline.
- He was scared
you were gonna leave him.
- A ball to the face.
ROB: He was like,
"A ball hit her in the face."
- Do you know
how important this is?
- So
- How are we?
- We're good.
- Girls' night was fun.
- It was fun.
But I really need to talk to
you guys about Stassi and Beau.
When we were in Italy--
I don't know
if Stassi told you this
because it was, like,
two years ago,
but they got in a big fight.
- Stassi told me
that it was, like, huge
and that
that D word was thrown out.
KATIE:
Divorce?
- Yeah, she--she.
It was her. Not him.
- Why does divorce keep
coming up with these two?
- She--
- Oh, my God.
- Basically was like,
I'm so pissed off at him.
He just, like, just
crossed the line for her.
She was [bleep] furious.
- What happened in Italy
made me
really, really uncomfortable.
STASSI: What's the point
that it got to,
just me just saying
I'm gonna divorce him?
TAYLOR: Then they recovered.
And they were fine.
But I feel like--
I feel like we've been having
these conversations
for a while now.
And I was hoping
that they would
have these,
from the side conversations,
come together and have them.
And now I'm realizing
that they're not.
- And she's telling us
that she has, like,
kind of found the source
of why she's controlling
and where her trauma
comes from,
but she's not talking to him.
Neither one of them are
trying to prioritize
having a conversation
but both have
big feelings about it.
- Abso-[bleep]-lutely.
Big, big feelings.
- That's not good.
- So we need to, like,
help them.
- I knew that things
with Stassi and Beau
were not great based on what
I heard and what I witnessed.
When you're ignoring
your problems,
when you're putting
your head in the sand
and avoiding dealing with it,
I feel like
the problems get deeper.
- My biggest fear
is hurting Stassi.
I don't want her
to feel attacked
but I also don't want to watch
her relationship dissolve.
- We'll figure it out.
- Go, team.
Go, team.
- I think that Friendsgiving
went pretty well.
- I think it went
spectacular for our family.
STASSI: How have I
traumatized our family?
- I think we already--
- Now Mom's rolling
her eyes at me.
- I'm not rolling.
Rolling is like this.
- This family is so [bleep] up.
DAYNA:
I'm thinking I should have
a conversation
with my daughter.
- Mm-hmm, but also take
accountability for the things
that have hurt her.
- Can I finish?
- Yes, but I'm just--
I just wanted to get that
in there.
- No.
I am a wonderful mother.
GEORGI:
You are.
DAYNA: I need to remind her
of all the 2 million
wonderful mom moments
that I have given her.
- I moved to Los Angeles
to be closer to family.
There should be
no sides to this.
Like, I shouldn't be
picking Stassi's side
or picking my mom's side.
It's, y'all are hurting
each other's feelings
and this needs to stop.
And why am I in the middle
of it yet again?
There were many mistakes
but there weren't
accountability taken.
I desperately want to help them
rebuild that relationship.
But me being pushy on either
one of those relationships
will not help the situation.
You can't move on
when you don't
take accountability
and fix things
with your fucking daughter.
- Exactly.
- But I don't know
what I've done.
- So you ask.
You ask.
Just ask.
STASSI: Does this open?
DAYNA: Hi.
GEORGI:
Oh, hey.
[dramatic music]
STASSI: What are you guys
talking about?
[dramatic orchestral music]
[bell dings]
- You can't move on
when you don't take
accountability and fix things.
- Exactly.
- But I don't know
what I've done.
- So you ask. You ask.
STASSI: Does this open?
DAYNA: Hi.
GEORGI:
Oh, hey.
Mom, all of a sudden, wants
to talk to Stassi.
So now it is my job to make
sure that this conversation is
as civilized
as humanly possible,
which that's not
gonna go well.
With Mom and Stass,
get [bleep] ready.
- You know the whole
courtyard can see in here.
It's [bleep] bananas.
- I know.
We're talking about you 'cause
Mom wants to have a talk.
And now we're gonna leave.
- What?
NIKOLAI:
Yeah.
So have--have fun with that.
[laughs]
GEORGI:
Yeah.
- Did I just walk
into my own ambush?
Like, what the [bleep]
is going on?
I'll hear my mom out, but if
this conversation goes south,
like, I'm done.
Like, fighting with my mom
in a room full of windows,
where everyone can look at me,
that's my own personal hell.
- Just holler if you need me,
and I'll--you know.
- I will holler.
♪
You know, when I told her
about this show, she, like,
pretended she didn't want
anything to do with it.
And I was like, great.
I don't want you to be on it
because I don't want to fight
with you.
And then, sure enough,
we start filming,
and she's like, I want in.
I'm like, but I thought we said
we weren't doing this.
BEAU:
Where's my wife?
GEORGIA:
Inside, talking to her mom.
BEAU:
[laughing] Oh, yeah.
Won't be going in there.
When they start talking,
I'm like, you know, no.
I'm gonna give myself
some distance.
- So I know you know
that I've been in therapy
for about five years now.
I learned a lot about myself
and about yours
and my relationship,
why I am so smothering of you.
- That's not the--
DAYNA:
I know.
- That's not the--
that's not the problem.
My mom and I's
relationship, like,
changed when I became an adult.
We just, like,
can't get along.
And she wants me to be
a certain type of daughter
and person that I'm just not.
I know you love me,
but you also make me
the enemy in the family
anytime there's an issue.
- That's in the past.
And I have shown you
over the last five years
that I have progressed so much.
And the things that you said
to me were horrible.
STASSI:
Name them.
DAYNA: You know that
I have autoimmune disease
and memory issues,
something that
you can't even imagine.
I bet you don't even know
what autoimmune disease I have.
- Fibromyalgia.
- That's not
an autoimmune disease.
I've sent you so many--
- Arthritis.
- So many articles
over the years.
You don't even know.
You want to see the crooked--
the crooked fingers?
Do you want to see
what it's doing to my organs?
Do you ever read the reports
I have sent you?
No.
You know why?
'Cause you don't care.
[dramatic music]
No matter how mean
of texts you send me--
- Oh. Do you hear yourself?
DAYNA: No.
- You've sent crazy,
mean texts.
- No.
GEORGI:
[gasps] OK, wait. Hold up.
DAYNA: No matter what
your issues are with me,
we both have--
- Literally, like,
as you're trying to make--
- We both have.
- You're doing this victim
thing where you're crying
and you're [bleep]--
DAYNA: No, I'm not crying.
I jump through hoops for you.
- I feel insane.
DAYNA: You feel insane?
- Yes.
- Do you know how insane
I felt when you called me?
"Come down here.
Patrick is--
you need to save me."
- Mom, you [bleep] loved it.
Patrick was an ex of mine
that I dated,
you know, on and off
for about four years
when I was in my late 20s.
And it is so [bleep] crazy
for my mom
to bring him up, knowing how
awful that relationship was.
And now I'm married
with two kids.
What is your point?
The second that I got my shit
together is like the second,
really, everything changed.
You wouldn't love
to see me and something
happen with me and Beau.
But you'd love a reason
to feel useful.
- Are you [bleep] kidding me?
- It's, like, about
feeling useful.
- Oh, shit.
DAYNA:
Nikolai?
NIKOLAI:
That was the biggest bullshit
I've ever heard in my life.
STASSI:
What?
- Please repeat
what you just said to Mom,
about her and you and Beau.
- I literally just said,
I know in your heart
you would never want
Beau and I to split up.
But if we did,
it would make you feel useful
because she--
I would need her help.
DAYNA:
No, because--
- Because she brought up
Patrick
and how I always needed her
to come save me.
DAYNA: And she said I loved it.
- I said you loved it.
I feel like Nikolai's coming
in here doing the same thing,
that he just blindly
defends my mom.
He doesn't know what
we're even talking about.
He just--he's being moronic.
GEORGI: I understand
where she's coming from.
Like, you--
DAYNA:
Of course, I--
- She finally needed you.
So it's like--
- But what's wrong with that?
- Are you staying away, or--
- Yes, I'm staying away.
- Well, I think just more like
the support of you being there.
And if you do need to step in
to, like, take a side--
- Oh, God. Damn it, Kristina.
STASSI: When are you guys
gonna get this?
I have a husband
and two children.
They take priority
over all of you.
That's where I feel safe.
- So you're not saying
you feel safe with us?
- Not really.
GEORGI:
Mom, I just--
- You haven't
given me a chance.
STASSI: Mom, we don't
like each other.
I am literally
the opposite of what
you would want as a daughter--
it's OK.
- You're insane.
- I kind of, like, agree.
STASSI: It's fine.
- Like, I'm the one that
answers the FaceTime calls.
I'm the one that, like,
I do want to cuddle with you.
I'll crawl in your lap
right now.
Like, I am that daughter.
- But that's because
she's harboring resentment.
- No, Stassi, I feel like,
has always been like that.
- What kind of--
what kind of mother wouldn't
like her daughter?
[dramatic music]
- Is Georgi standing up
for me right now?
That was a surprise to me, OK?
- Why are you talking about
your daughter like this?
I feel like the camera
goes on my mom,
and my mom turns into this,
like, insane person.
Like, I love you so much,
but Team Stass.
It takes time after
being hurt so many times.
- How much time?
Do I have to be dead?
NIKOLAI:
We love you.
And Mom, out of anyone else,
would be there first for you.
BEAU:
Actually, no.
Sometimes,
in certain situations,
I don't think she would.
- OK, Beau.
- Don't be dismissive of him.
- Sorry, I will--
STASSI:
Literally--no, it's OK.
I would rather, like, go.
BEAU:
I will leave.
- I am never not nice to you.
- I don't know
that I will ever have
a healthy relationship
with my family.
And with everything
that I'm trying to build,
like, I don't have space
in my life for people
who don't support me.
Just wait until
the end of the night
tonight, when you're crying,
and then you have Nikolai
[bleep] call me
and send me
crazy [bleep] texts.
What just happened, like,
just reminded me
how important Beau is to me.
And if anyone tries to come
between us, like my mom,
I'm not gonna be happy.
BEAU:
Let's go.
♪
NICK: You ready for
a DJ Short King set?
KATIE:
I can't wait.
NICK: You've done more DJing
than I ever have.
[upbeat music]
KATIE: Emo Nite is
a very important night to me.
It's just representative
of a part of me
that I lost when I was
married to Tom Schwartz
that I've been reconnecting
with and just helping
re-identify with myself.
- Let's party.
- And it has healing
properties, I'm convinced.
And given
that there was some drama
at the housewarming party,
I think my friends
could really use this night.
Plus, Dayna's coming.
Not Stassi's mom Dayna,
my Dayna.
BEAU:
This is fun. This is fancy.
- How are you?
Is it Dad's night out or what?
- Dad's night out.
I'm getting lit tonight.
I feel bad that I'm leaving
Stass after the blowout
that she had, you know,
with her mom.
But, you know, someone's got
to support Katie.
- How are you?
Where's Stassi?
- Come on.
Imagine a world
where Stassi is emo.
And what would that look like?
You can just go to the internet
and type in her name
and The Amazing Race,
and there's, like, some photos
of her, pre-chin,
with black hair.
I probably shouldn't say that.
Damn, cut that.
I'm gonna get
in so much trouble.
Shit.
KATIE:
I wish Stassi was here.
- Yeah.
KATIE: But, like,
the next thing,
she's [bleep] coming to,
otherwise I'm never coming
to a kid's birthday again.
Just kidding.
I literally just got
in a fight with Kristina
about not showing up
for each other.
And now the same thing is
happening with Stassi,
with her not coming
to Emo Nite.
I just hope we can
course correct this
before it ends up
in a screaming match.
- All right,
we're gonna bring on
our first special guest DJ
of the night.
[cheers and applause]
Katie Maloney.
[cheers and applause]
- What's up?
[rock music]
♪
BEAU: The old Beau is
definitely back tonight.
And there's something
about an environment
where everyone is singing.
You know, it's like church.
Hey, Katie!
Hey, hey!
You can't not feel good.
I'm getting emo-tional
just thinking about it.
♪
I'm doing the elevator--watch.
Ready?
BEAU: And this is why
my wife doesn't laugh at me
when I do dad jokes.
[sighs] Shit.
It's a dad joke!
KATIE: This is the Beau
I remember hanging out with.
He is smiling.
He's got light in his eyes.
I just feel like
he needs more fun in his life.
I wish Stassi could see
this side of Beau
so she could remember and see
how much things have changed.
- Beau's organized
this dodgeball game.
I'm gonna talk to Stassi
because I feel like
I have to at least try.
[quirky music]
I love you guys.
Thank you!
[playful music]
TEDDY:
So we agree this is, like,
an us decision for me to stay?
TAYLOR:
Yeah.
STASSI: You know, I haven't
actually been in your bedroom--
TAYLOR:
Oh, you haven't?
- No.
- Teddy's gonna stay with us.
It's her belly.
Careful, it's very delicate.
Teddy's been gone
for literally five hours,
and I'm completely
losing my mind.
I'm going through it
right now, but Stassi is
also going through it, I know.
So we might have to just,
like, be mutual shoulders
to cry on for each other.
- That's so cute
and weird of you guys.
TAYLOR:
I know, right?
I've been so wrapped up
in, like, Tay leaving
that I haven't even spoken
to Stassi about the shit
that went down with her mom.
That was heavy.
So I can't imagine
she's doing very well.
STASSI:
This is so chic.
It just looks like
an expensive [bleep] sculpture
that I don't understand.
- Anyway, are you OK?
- I'm trying to wrap my head
around all of this with my mom.
I have these memories of, like,
having this big, happy family
and having
lots of people around,
like, especially when
my grandmother was alive.
But I also--half the time,
it wasn't like that
because my parents'
relationships
were always so broken.
And that's what I want
to change for my kids.
So it's, like,
been a hard thing
to be like,
I know a bunch of things
that you've done wrong,
but also,
I want you to have
a relationship with my children
because they love you.
And I know how much
you love them.
So it's like,
boundaries get blurred
because I'm giving her
my children.
- Can I also just give you,
though,
a moment of credit for that?
There's a lot of people who,
if they aren't
getting along
with their parents,
they withhold their children.
They even weaponize
their children.
You are very mature that
you are compartmentalizing it.
You deserve credit for it.
- I really appreciate that
because I feel like
I don't do it enough.
I should do it more.
But I'm like--but, no.
Like, that's not fair.
Like, she doesn't get
to [bleep] treat me like this
and then have access to me
and my kids all the time.
I like my mom to be
around my kids.
That I take seriously.
So, like, regardless of whether
we're fighting or not,
I try to make as much
of an effort as I can.
One of the things I love
about my mom, OK?
She used to take me to Europe
whenever she felt she could.
And we were in Venice, Italy.
And I was talking
to her about how
I wanted to move
to Hollywood and Los Angeles
and be an actress.
And she was like, what makes
you think you could do that?
And I remember specifically--
this is, like,
one of the most clear memories
I have of my childhood--
granted, I was like 13 or 14--
of me being like,
just because you couldn't do it
doesn't mean that I can't.
- Whoa.
- And it was like the world
[bleep] stopped in that moment.
And I feel like ever since
I had any sort of fame
whatsoever, or success--
I don't know that--
if resentful is the right word.
I've surpassed her.
I don't know what, like,
new text messages
I'm gonna get when this airs.
I don't know what new problems
this is gonna create.
And it will.
I know that her feelings
are gonna get hurt.
And I'm like, why do I care?
She hurt my feelings.
But like, I still want
to protect her.
But like, she does it
to herself.
No, when we were in the car
on the way home,
like, I literally just was just
like, Beau, thank you so much.
- He was wonderful.
- And I'm really sorry that
my mom was like that to you.
But I really appreciated
you stepping in
just for a second
because it was the moment where
my mom was like,
I would do anything for you.
She does this victim thing.
And Beau was like,
no, you wouldn't.
I am so insanely grateful
for Beau.
And I know, at times,
I can be really selfish.
So I forget to take
his wants and needs
seriously because I'm
so focused on my own.
But that doesn't mean
I don't want him to be happy.
I do.
But like, sometimes
I don't know how
to get past my selfishness.
It's really hard.
I know how easy it is
to make him happy.
I'm happy when he's happy.
And I want to see him happy.
- I know.
- Like, I want that.
- Right.
- But also, like,
sometimes I can't sacrifice
myself for the sake of him.
- Did I just hear that
correctly?
I thought we were
moving forward,
and it feels like
a big step backwards.
And it's making me
kind of nervous.
So I just feel like we have to
have like, a real come to Jesus
to keep things
on the right track.
♪
[dramatic orchestral music]
♪
KATIE: Dude, this is gonna be
over in 10 seconds.
We're dead.
[music slows to a stop]
- We're excited to have
all of you guys here today.
Welcome to WeHo Dodgeball.
- I played dodgeball for
probably eight or nine years
twice a week.
Took some time off.
Now I'm back.
I'm envisioning myself
just getting balls
and just beaming people--
pow, pow, pow--
catching balls one-handed like
a freaking dodgeball magician.
But I don't know if my body's
gonna be able to do that.
See that right there?
Look at that.
- Did you think
I was gonna play dodgeball?
L-O-L. It's not for me.
So I'm gonna sit in the very
corner of the bleachers today.
I value my face.
- Like, Stassi has
the right idea.
She's not playing.
She's just there to support.
Like, can I do that?
Like, I was a cheerleader.
I'm really good
on the sidelines.
You actually prefer me
to be on the sidelines.
I'm not helpful.
GEORGI: Growing up,
Stassi didn't put her toes
in the sand because
it would get her dirty.
So, no, I'm not surprised
she's not playing dodgeball.
Also, how did she get out of it
and I have to do it?
Like, annoying.
- This side, ready.
This side, ready.
- Yeah.
[whistle blasts]
[cheering]
[whistle blows]
[people screaming]
PERSON:
Catch. You gotta catch.
Gotta catch. Catch.
- This is not helping.
This is not winning dodgeball.
Up, up.
["In the Hall
of the Mountain King"]
- You need a butt pad.
BEAU: Oh, catch it,
catch it, catch it.
Oh!
Ugh.
That was good. You're out.
It hit your clothes.
That's why I said,
don't wear baggy clothes.
- I thought dodgeball
was just like gym class.
But like, no,
these people are treating it
like it's the Olympics.
Katie, Kristina, whoo!
You girls got this!
GEORGI: OK.
KATIE:
Oh. Oh.
- Oh.
- Oh.
- Good job.
- That was good.
- You made it to, like,
the very end.
- Well, yeah,
and then I got smacked
so hard in the [bleep] face
with the ball, like--
- Careful!
- If you hit me,
I hit you with my car,
just so you know.
Whoa. That was good.
Doing your thing.
- It was really fun.
Beau was so sweet.
He had the biggest smile
on his face the whole time.
He came up to me, like,
while I was DJing.
He's like, it's so good to see
you, like, happy like this.
I'm like, it's so good
to see you, like, so happy.
You're, like, living right now.
- He went back to work.
- Oh.
How's it going?
- I think good.
- You think?
Do you not ask him?
- I still forgot to ask.
L-O-L.
- Stassi.
[playful music]
OK, well, step one,
ask him how his day went.
You just don't talk
about anything?
No, "How was your day?
What did you do today?"
Like, this is, like,
a big life thing
to just be so nonchalant about.
Gotta be more chalant, girl.
- I landed on the mic pack,
and I think it sprained my hip.
[orchestral music]
We can go sit at the park.
ROB: Get some fresh air.
- You guys did such
an amazing job out there.
A bunch of athletes.
ROB: There you go, guys.
Pizza.
- Whoo.
ROB:
Thank Beau.
- Grazie mille.
- Who won the last game?
- For dodgeball?
- We did.
- Yeah.
- Do they have
dodgeball in Italy?
- It's called,
like, prison ball.
BOTH: Prison ball?
- Yeah.
Palla prigioniera.
GEORGI:
That's accurate.
That is--the Italians
know what's up.
- Prison ball.
GEORGI: Prison ball.
- Yes.
- Next week, I want to do
an epic holiday dinner
on the Queen Mary.
It's the only time I have
ever actually been so scared
that I didn't sleep
in my own hotel room.
I'm doing the Queen Mary
because I refuse
to throw a normal
holiday party.
I need ghosts.
I need history.
I need a venue that
makes people uncomfortable.
ROB: Georgi.
GEORGI: What's up?
ROB: Finish your plate?
GEORGI: Finish my plate?
ROB: Yeah.
GEORGI: Yeah.
KATIE: I see the Rob
and Georgi connection.
And it feels incestuous.
Unfortunately,
I am used to that.
I'm no stranger to very
incestuous type friendships.
All different variations.
- I wanted to ask you.
You took off and went
to Palm Springs with Georgia?
- Yeah.
- How was that?
GEORGI:
It was actually really--
like, it was good.
I was so depressed after
that housewarming party.
I just literally felt like,
what the [bleep] am I doing?
Why am I here?
My family is, like,
all falling apart.
I literally, like,
started spiraling,
like, because I just
feel alone.
I feel alone more than ever.
Now that I got a divorce
and my family's
not all together,
going to Palm Springs, like,
kind of healed me.
I needed my people
and my friends.
- What was it like
taking Georgia with you?
Why did you take Georgia
with you?
- Because I'm trying
to include her.
- Apparently, she told Beau
that she doesn't even like you.
- What?
- I heard the Gs
aren't doing well.
- God, my sister came over
last night, and
- Oh, God.
- She just doesn't really
like Georgi at all.
- For real?
- She's just like,
I just really think
she is not a good person.
- Like, as a person,
which is more than
I won't choose you as a friend.
I don't really like to get
in business that's not mine.
But I've watched Georgi
and Georgia go through
this back and forth
and talking shit
for the last three weeks.
And I don't think
Georgi knows the extent
to which Georgia is saying
to other people.
I mean, you can
not like somebody,
but that you hate them?
That's a big deal.
And then ask
for rides to places
and go hang out with them
at the same time?
It seems like Georgia's getting
her cake and eating it too.
And Georgi doesn't even know
there's cake on the table.
- I'm pissed now.
I'm pissed from that.
It's just like,
how many [bleep] things
am I gonna have to do
and bend over backwards?
Everything she says about me
behind my back, it's sad.
I'm working so hard
to try and be your friend.
Yes, I'm also venting
about her.
But that's what we do.
And I keep trying with Georgia,
and it's not working.
And now to hear
that I'm a bad person
on top of all of this,
I'm like, of course.
Just keep adding it on.
You hate me. I get it.
Crystal clear.
I get the message.
Am I a bad person?
ROB: I don't think so.
- Am I a shit person?
ROB:
I don't think so.
- Like, I really feel
like I'm the devil.
Like, I--am I Satan's mistress?
[dramatic music]
Ooh, I'm gonna crash out.
[laughs]
ROB: Don't crash out.
GEORGI:
I'm losing my [bleep] mind.
I'm about to [bleep] crash out
at Georgia right now.
- What?
What am I doing?
Am I the devil?
- No, I'm the devil.
And don't you forget it.
But welcome
to the family business.
I've never felt prouder.
I'm glad you now feel the same.
- What the [bleep]?
- Not with her--
I'm just saying, like,
with people just, like,
acting like I'm scary.
GEORGI:
Georgia, did you tell Beau
that you think
I'm a bad person?
[tense music]
- No.
- You didn't say that?
- To who?
What am I--why is my name
brought in here?
- You told us that at dinner.
- Huh?
- You told us that at dinner
with me, Nick, and Teddy.
- I told you guys that.
So why did you go
tell her that?
- Because I think
she deserves to know
what she's saying
behind her back.
- This was a while ago
at dinner, but wow.
- Just last week.
- So I--
You just broke bro code.
Go [bleep] yourself.
I'm just shocked
that I can't even sit there
and have a conversation
without all of you guys
chirp, chirp, chirp,
chirp, chirping.
- Oh, my God, dude.
- [bleep], man,
that's so annoying.
- No, but wait, Beau,
it's just important to me.
Did I said she's a bad--
- You said that you don't think
that she's a good person.
- No, I said
that I don't like her,
but not that she's a bad--
like, being a bad person,
to me--
- Right, when we were
talking in the kitchen,
you just said,
"I just don't think
that she's a very good person."
- It's just because I know
this is not my thinking.
So I don't like her--
BEAU: OK.
Well, then I misunderstood.
- Good.
Well, now you can explain
what you mean.
- I said that I don't like
how you behave
but not that
you are a bad person.
You lie.
So, to me, lie is not
a nice thing to do.
- I'm shocked,
and I'm not shocked.
I'm shocked because I'm like,
really, we're still here?
We're still here,
after all this time,
and I'm still a bad person?
To me,
I'm bending over backwards
to make sure you feel loved
and that you don't feel alone
here in LA.
If I'm so bad,
why are you here with me?
Then leave.
Like, shit.
- So I don't think
you are a bad person.
- But you don't like me.
'Cause if you don't like me,
then why are we hanging out?
Why am I devoting my time
to hang out with you?
- I don't like when you have
a behavior that I don't like.
- If you don't like me
as a person,
then why am I bending
over backward
to include you
in all my things?
- This is back in the day.
It wasn't yesterday.
- I'm just trying to say
that this happened.
We had a conversation
a week ago.
Rob narced me out.
ROB: Pssh! I didn't narc--
- And then--
you did, schoolgirl.
ROB: I didn't--whoa,
shut the [bleep] up.
- Please, I'm [bleep]
annoyed with that.
- I didn't narc you out.
- [bleep] my [bleep].
GEORGI:
Whoa.
- Are you [bleep] kidding me
right now, dude?
- I'm so pissed off at you.
ROB: You have no reason
to be [bleep] pissed off.
BEAU:
I'm so pissed off. Yes.
- I've never heard him
talk like that.
I'm clutching my pearls
for Beau.
Like, where did this come from?
- Taking something from 1986
and making it relevant again.
Like, everybody can
[bleep] my [bleep].
BEAU: The reason why
I'm pissed off at Rob
is 'cause we have literally
just started anew
to work on our friendship,
and then the first thing you do
is, you choose Georgi.
I see who's your number one,
and it's not me.
So now I'm like, I don't want
anything to do with you
because you suck.
[bell dings]
GEORGI: But I feel like
it's nice that
he's actually doing that,
'cause nobody's telling me.
GEORGIA:
No, Georgi, I'm telling you.
Hello, I'm here.
I'll repeat it.
BEAU: Stupid.
GEORGIA: So one week ago,
we were fighting.
- So [bleep] stupid.
- We had problems.
When I went home,
I was telling him
how I felt about us.
That's it.
Then I came home.
But in these days,
it was, honestly, good.
- Yeah, I thought so too.
- And we are good.
I'm just explaining you
for what happened--
- No, I'm glad you're good.
I'm not good.
- Yeah,
but I'm explaining you--
- But see, again, remember,
I take time.
- OK, take your time.
- I'm an emotional bitch.
- But how do you feel about me?
- I love you,
but you irritate
the shit out of me.
- So
- We feel the same
about each other.
It's just that I say out loud.
- Yeah. You do.
- I just said it out loud.
I'm facing my fears right now.
- I'm proud of Georgi
for taking my advice
and standing up for herself.
- But when we get along--
- There is a love
for each other.
Yes, of course, there is
a love for each other.
- She's just processing
at a different pace.
- Yeah, she's just delayed.
But then when she comes
and say, I'm fine--
- But that's my go-to.
It's like, oh, I'm fine.
I'm fine right now.
- No, because I cannot
deal with that.
- So that's what I'll do
going forward.
Instead of saying I'm fine,
I'll say
I'm sitting with it still.
I'll let you know.
- Yeah.
- You guys are like
boyfriend-girlfriend.
- No, we're actually married,
you guys.
Surprise.
- Come here, baby.
You know, at least
Georgia and I are
confronting our issues head-on,
unlike some people I know--
Stassi and Beau--who just
sweep it under the rug.
I do feel better now.
But also, how long is
that gonna last?
Are we just gonna fight
in a couple days again?
Am I gonna be a bad person
in an hour?
When--when is that
gonna happen?
- But I didn't like
that behavior.
I have to say it again,
'cause that's throwing--
like, just throwing,
like, fireball,
because I don't see
an intention,
"She needs to know,"
like we are literally
in kindergarten.
- All right.
Nah, that's not kindergarten.
I'll save you some Play-Doh
in kindergarten
when it's your [bleep] turn.
[bell dings]
- What did he say?
- He didn't say anything.
- Well, you don't need
to say we're in kindergarten.
What the [bleep] are we doing?
- Can you repeat me
what he said?
- He was being sarcastic.
And, I mean, if I have to
translate, a little bit rude.
- Honestly, I hope
the editors cut that out.
[bell dings]
- It's [bleep] annoying.
I'm just gonna say that
right now.
It's annoying. It's annoying.
Is this your way of, like,
flirting or something?
I'm just shocked where
Rob is just kind of
showing me who he is.
And if you're trying
to rebuild a friendship,
actions like this aren't
gonna help anything.
- So who's next?
Who has some beef to settle?
[laughs]
TAYLOR: Can I put some
lip gloss on first?
[laughs]
- I mean, where do we
even go from here?
♪
KRISTINA:
Beau seemed happy today.
Like, seeing him
in his element.
KATIE: Oh, my God.
He was living.
- And Stassi didn't want
to play.
KATIE:
I told her--I was like,
this is great
that he has his thing.
And I was like, would you
rather this or the job?
She goes, oh, no,
he started the job.
I was like, oh, he did.
I was like, how's it going?
She goes, I don't know.
And I was like--
- How many days
has he worked it?
- I don't--
I don't even know if she knows.
- You ask about
that kind of stuff.
I understand Stassi's busy.
But I think
what she's really doing is,
she doesn't want to know
because she doesn't
want it happening.
She's ignoring it,
hoping it would go away.
But what's that doing is
making it bigger.
She should at least pretend
like she cares.
I think the best thing would
probably be having, like,
a few of us get together
and maybe talk to her.
I don't want her to feel like
we're ganging up on her,
but I don't feel like
she's left us another option.
But do you think she's gonna,
like, freak out?
[suspenseful music]
- I'm typically not
scared of Stassi
and feel comfortable
approaching her with things,
but I am a little concerned
with how she's gonna take it
when she feels like
she's being ganged up on,
because that's kind of
what this feels like.
- I think that's the only way
it's gonna get through
to Stassi.
KATIE: But I would rather have
this blow up in my face
than have her marriage blow up.
So I'm a little nervous.
♪
[playful music]
PERSON: It's gonna become
more intense.
- I feel like it's gonna
give me an orgasm or something.
- Here we go.
- Oh.
- Oh, my--
- You put it higher!
[laughter]
Oh, my God.
Oh.
♪
GABRIELLA: Hi.
- Oh.
- Come here.
- Stop.
Will your dog,
like, nibble me if I
STASSI:
Like, in a mean way?
GABRIELLA:
Like, pick him up?
STASSI: Sometimes she loves it.
Sometimes she doesn't.
Gabriella and Sher are
two of my favorite people
that I met on Vanderpump Villa,
so much so that we became
closer after Vanderpump Villa.
I was proud of you guys
GABRIELLA: I'm, like, sore.
- For dodgeball.
Y'all were just, like,
team players just
really doing the damn thing.
- Wait, so like--
- Could never be me.
SHER: It brought me back
to my childhood, honestly.
GABRIELLA:
Was Beau, like, happy?
STASSI:
No, he was really happy.
- Do you love seeing him
like that?
- I like seeing him happy, yes.
It's like, sometimes
I feel like instead of, like,
taking the initiative to do
the things that make him happy,
he just, like, sulks about
not doing those things.
And I'm like,
you know you could just
have an adult conversation
with me
and then do them, you know?
- Maybe you should play
dodgeball with him one day.
- No.
- It could be cute.
It could honestly
just be you two,
like, throwing the ball at--
[both laugh]
GABRIELLA: No.
SHER:
Do something cute like that.
- Why would I ever play
one-on-one dodgeball with Beau?
What point was she
trying to make?
[bell dings]
- Wait, so your sister
and Georgia are just like--
they don't get along.
That's it.
- Georgi has more people.
And that's, like, also
what makes it hard.
It's like, Georgia just has us.
- She should, like, go on,
like, an app for friends.
- Who wouldn't want to be
friends with a chic Italian?
- Take her
to networking events.
- I don't--no.
I need to be babysat
at networking events.
Like, Taylor is a good
wingwoman for me
when she comes with me.
- Oh, I know she is.
- I just don't feel
fully comfortable.
I don't know.
- What gives you anxiety?
- I don't know what people
know or think of me.
- OK.
- If people have
preconceived notions.
Do you know what I mean?
And that--
- 'Cause of, like, your past
and, like, everything
with Vanderpump Rules.
STASSI: Yes.
Everything that's, like,
gone down in my career.
- I wanted to ask you
about that.
[dramatic orchestral music]
♪
So when I met you in Villa,
like, I knew nothing.
And then, obviously, like,
I got close to you.
We became friends.
And then I got home.
And I was telling my friends.
And then, like, social media,
and I would, like,
see everything.
And I was like, oh.
If I did know,
I would have given you
the cold shoulder.
♪