Squiddly Diddly (1965) s01e07 Episode Script

Squiddly, where are you,
Squiddly?
Report to me
on the double.
You want something, chief?
Yes. I want you to
clean up the place
before the crowd gets here.
Mop the decks, polish the
rails, and tidy up the place.
Now, get going.
Yes, sir.
At once, sir.
Oh, what luck!
Just when I plan to
take a little bath.
Squiddly, aren't
you finished yet?
Do the laundry,
iron the sheets.
Serve the lunch and
polish my shoes.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Do the laundry,
iron the sheet.
Serve the lunch.
Shine the shoes.
Boy, am I poop.
I just gotta rest for a minute.
Squiddly, on your feet.
- Here come the customers.
- That does it.
I'm tired of being bust around.
And I'm gonna get out of here.
But how? I'll never
get past the chief.
Welcome to Bubbleland, folks.
The show will start
in 5 minutes.
Hope you all enjoy yourselves.
You can leave the
carriage over there ma'am.
Thank you.
Come on, junior.
Momsy will show
you the cute fishes.
Oh, a baby carriage!
Is my chance to
roll out of here.
One minute more till showtime.
- Then I'll close the door.
- So far, so good.
The chief will
never recognize me.
- What the
- "Arrivederci" admiral.
Oh my.
What a holy kid.
If I didn't know better
I'd have sworn it
was Squiddly Diddly.
I made it!
I made it! I'm out!
Now, to head for
the wide open spaces.
And what could be more
wide open than the ocean?
Honolulu, here I come!
I know the chief was working
me too hard. I'm beat.
I better rest for a while.
This is better.
Hey, here comes a ship.
Might as well hit a ride.
Honolulu's a long way up.
Hey, skipper.
- How about a lift?
- Well, Shiver me timbers!
If it ain't the answer
to me prayers.
Come aboard, my deeds.
Hey, where are the
rest of your friends?
I thought I saw a
whole bunch of you.
Just me, sir.
I'm a squid. And my name
is Squiddly Diddly.
Well, I never shipped with
a squid before.
But me crew mutinied and I
threw them overboard.
- Know anything about ships?
- No, sir.
Well, I'll, sign you
on as my crew anyway.
Now get me low mighty
and bring me some grub.
- And hurry up.
- Aye aye, sir.
Here you are, sir.
- What took you so long?
- Sorry, sir.
Don't let it happen again.
Yes, sir.
Yeah! I mean that no, sir.
- Yeah. That is I mean
- Squidly!
- You forgot the salt.
- I'll get it! I'll get it!
Oh, boy.
This guy's as bad
as the chief.
On the double, Squiddly!
Your salt, sir.
Stop stalling and get busy.
Shine that brass.
Swab that deck.
Shake your leg,
you scurvy crew.
Oh, boy.
Honolulu is still
2,000 miles away.
- This is awful
- Avast there, Squiddly.
Get aloft and unfurl
that topsail.
Miz the mizzen mast.
Main the main sail.
And while you're up there.
Clean out the crow's nest.
Aye aye, sir.
Will that be all, sir?
Are you kidding?
Hit the deck, Squiddley.
Aye aye, sir.
You didn't have
to hit it so hard.
My apologyies, sir.
Bite down and get
back to your duty.
Yes, sir.
Oh brother.
Bubbleland is a rest
home compared to this.
Looks like we're
in for a storm, Squiddly.
Fatten down the ashes
and be quick about it.
Yes, sir.
Reef the mainsail.
She's starting to blow.
Reef the mainsail.
I don't even know what
he's talking about.
How's that, sir?
You blasted landlubber!
Secure the mizzen mast.
There.
That ought to hold it.
Uh-oh!
Looks like trouble.
Man, the bilge pops.
We sprung a leak.
Aye, aye, sir!
Whoops.
I don't think this
is gonna work.
Mr. Squiddly.
Report on deck.
Seaman Squiddly, first
class, reporting on deck, sir.
This deck, you clumsy swab.
The only one left. And
you're gonna walk the plank.
Oh no, sir.
- Not that.
- Yes, that.
Now, get going.
Come on. Come on.
Come on, come on.
Wake up, Squiddly.
Ah The first classroom
Where am I?
What what happened?
You fell asleep,
that's what happened.
The show's over and
everyone's left.
And I'm about to
tidy up the place.
Oh, no, you don't, chief.
I'll box the deck,
polish the brass.
Do the laundry,
iron the sheet.
Serve your lunch and
shine your shoes.
And believe me, it sure
beat walking the plank.
Huh?