Stick (2025) s01e07 Episode Script
Dreams Never Remembered
1
[imitates whooshing]
[screams]
- [chuckles]
- I freeze you with my mutant powers.
I can't move.
[groaning, laughing]
I can't move. [groans]
Honey, please help me. I-I'm frozen.
- [chuckles]
- No talking! You frozen.
[Amber-Linn] You better zip it.
You heard Mutant Boy.
[chuckles] What am I supposed to do now?
Now you must pay for all your crimes.
Please, I have money in my wallet.
- If I can just reach it.
- You
No! You must pay with your life.
What? That's pretty aggressive.
- [imitates whooshing]
- No! [groans]
[chuckles] Oh, you've shattered me
in a million pieces. No!
Hey [grunts] Mutant Boy, wait!
Mutant Boy, I beg you,
don't leave me like this!
[stammers]
[Jett] Dad, I'm sorry. [sighs]
Jett, you upstairs?
What's going on?
I didn't mean to.
Is that Is that a
A brontosaurus.
- [Pryce sighs]
- [Jett] The largest of the quadrupeds.
Well, that explains the flooding.
- Mystery solved.
- [gasps] What happened?
Well, we have a brontosaurus
stuck in the toilet.
- Again?
- [Pryce grunts] Yeah.
Who knew that was their natural habitat?
Well, I mean, it is a sauropod.
But there are other aquatic dinosaurs,
you know?
- Like, um
- In this toilet?
- No! No, of course not. No.
- [sighs]
But the G.I. Joes, they were
trying to save the brontosaurus.
No. Jett, you can't send those guys
on a fool's mission like that.
That's
- Am I in trouble?
- Well
- Yeah!
- [grunts]
You gotta keep the dinosaurs
out of the toilet.
[strains] I think that's how
they became extinct in the first place.
No, they were wiped out by an asteroid.
That's another school of thought.
How do you know so much about dinosaurs?
Dad, I'm seven years old. I'm not a baby.
Wait.
You're seven?
[people laughing on TV]
[applause on TV]
[Pryce grunts]
[TV switches off]
[clears throat] Okay.
We need to talk about this.
I mean, what were you thinking?
Were you even thinking?
- I don't know.
- Where were you going?
Nowhere. We were just driving around.
Mrs. Anders said she saw you guys coming
out of the McDonald's drive-through.
Dylan needed a salad.
Well, I appreciate
that Dylan is health-conscious,
- but you cannot do that.
- [sighs]
I mean, do you know
how dangerous that is?
Especially at night.
Hey, don't ignore me. This is serious.
- Something could've happened to you guys.
- You're being dramatic.
Am I?
I think I'm being pretty
measured and cool
considering my 13-year-old
just took the car out for a joyride.
[sighs] Do you have to tell Mom?
What do you think?
- [groans]
- Hey.
Don't walk away from me.
We're not done here.
I said I was sorry.
[grunts] Did you? I didn't hear that.
Hey, don't walk away from me. Jett.
[people laughing, clamoring]
["Thinking of You" playing on speakers]
Hey. Frosty?
- Hey, Pryce. Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Why don't you just, like, tell her
you like her shirt?
- [groans]
- Girls love that.
- They wanna talk about their clothes.
- [scoffs]
- So embarrassing.
- What? No, it isn't.
Just grab a lemonade
and bring it over to her.
- [chuckles]
- No. Just
- What? No?
- No.
What about if you have her, like,
- do the limbo thing with you?
- [Pryce] Yeah.
[scoffs] You've got no game.
- [chuckles]
- I have game.
Ask your father. I have
- Your mom has serious game, okay?
- Yeah.
This is the Shaquille O'Neal
- of seduction.
- Wow.
- Seduction?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Please never say that word to me again.
What, you don't wanna
hear how your mom seduced me?
- How she's this siren, this temptress.
- [chuckles]
Dad. Ew.
[sighs] Okay, sorry.
Just go with the lemonade.
And just be yourself.
That's all the game you need.
[Pryce] He looks good.
Yeah. I'm impressed.
Uh-oh.
Passing the lemonade stand
- Okay
- rejecting Dad's idea.
Calling an audible.
- Target locked.
- Is he gonna move in?
[Amber-Linn whispers]
Come on, honey. You got this.
- Smile.
- Yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah.
- [Pryce whispers] It's working.
- They're really cute.
- Yeah.
- Okay, why is he walking?
- [stammers]
- He's retreating. [stammers]
- Wait, what's he Oh, God.
- [chuckles]
- Oh, he's doing push-ups.
[chuckles] Wait. I can't watch this.
- Why is he doing push-ups?
- Why?
- Why is he doing [chuckles]
- Why would you do
Wait, no, no, no.
[Amber-Linn gasps]
[Pryce whispers] It's working.
Push-ups worked.
- Oh, my God.
- He's got game like his mom.
- Who knew?
- [Amber-Linn shushes]
[gasps]
[partygoer] Hey, Pryce!
[music stops]
[Amber-Linn] Are you trying
to give me gray hair?
What's going on?
Your son and Conor
decided to give each other
- homemade tattoos with this.
- No. [sighs]
Did you even clean the needle? Do
you know this is how you get hepatitis?
Is that right? A or B?
All of 'em. All of the hepatitises.
- Who cares? Look at your son's shoulder.
- Dad, it was supposed to be
- it was supposed to be an eagle.
- [Pryce] Okay.
[chuckling] That doesn't look
like an eagle.
I know, Dad. Conor's an asshole.
He thought it'd be funny.
- I'm calling his mother.
- No.
No, no, no. Please don't call his mom.
- Please. Don't
- You have a dick on your shoulder!
And balls. But hold it. Let me see this.
- Let's not panic here.
- Wait.
- I might be able to fix it.
- Pryce, no. No!
Wait. Let me add a few strategic lines,
and we can repurpose this.
- Ow.
- Hold it.
- Ow! Ow, ow, ow!
- [gasps]
- Hold it, hold it.
- Babe! Babe!
What are you gonna do? Ow!
- You're actually tattooing our child.
- Hold on.
Yeah, I'm trying to save it.
Voilà.
What the hell is it?
It's a Civil War cannon.
You know, like he's a history buff.
It looks like a dick on wheels.
- [Pryce] You're out of your mind.
- [gasps] Dad!
- It does! Look at that.
- Dad!
- It looks good!
- [Jett] Oh, my God!
[Amber-Linn] Jett!
[rock music playing on speakers]
Hey! Hey, turn the music down!
I know you hear me!
Hey, you're not the only one
who lives here.
Jett! Jett! Hey! Hey. [scoffs]
- Oh, hey, Dad.
- Did you not hear me?
- Uh, no.
- Yeah 'cause your music's too loud.
Come on, you gotta turn it down.
That's gonna screw up your hearing.
Okay, yeah, sorry.
[sighs] How's it going?
[sighs] Pretty good.
Um. Got almost everything.
I have to put some some of this stuff
in the garage though, I think.
[sighs] God,
it feels really empty in here.
Yeah. [chuckles]
What are you gonna do with this?
Uh, throw away.
No way.
- Yeah.
- Jett, you can't get rid of this.
Dad, come on. Not you too.
What?
Don't get all weepy and shit like Mom.
I never let myself imagine this.
[chuckles] It's just college.
[sighs deeply]
I
I didn't get enough time with you,
Mutant Boy.
- [imitates laser]
- [groans] You got me.
[chuckles] Okay, you're unfrozen.
Would you mind helping me
take this downstairs?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
What if I never see you again?
Dad, I'm gonna be, like,
three hours away, okay?
Well, let's do something together
before you go.
Yeah, I I have plans.
I'm meeting the guys tonight.
- You can't go.
- What?
It's Julian's last night
before he goes to Notre Dame.
Jett, you gotta stay with us.
But, Dad, come on. I have plans.
I know, but we've got plans with you.
Do you ever think about that?
Jett, your mom and I have plans.
And do you ever think about
what you leaving would do to her?
Mom's gonna be all right.
- What about me?
- Dad.
What if I'm not gonna be all right?
- [zips bag]
- You'll be fine. Okay?
I mean, what's that thing
you're always telling me?
- It-It's, uh, Grossweiner's law, right?
- Yeah.
You gotta let the past go.
Yeah, I'm scared to do that.
You gotta focus on the moment, Dad.
It's the only thing you can control.
[sighs]
[child] Where's your son?
My son?
The pickleball kid.
No, he's not my son.
Uh, he left.
Is that why you were crying?
[sighs]
Uh, maybe.
[grunts]
- [child] Hmm.
- [sighing]
You want an orange juice?
Sure.
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
[theme song playing]
- [Mitts] Hello?
- Hey. Did you know?
Did you know what Pryce
was doing with Zero?
I did not know about the money.
He broke his heart, Mitts.
I know.
Well, I've been on record several times,
the man's an asshole.
- Where is he?
- No idea.
But he's like a dog,
he'll show up the last place he was fed.
[Elena] Okay, where are you going?
- I'm taking Zero to the bus station.
- Mm-hmm.
I need you to do me a favor.
But with Ready Safe Insurance's
True Form Protection Plan,
you'll always be ready
to hit the next shot.
I'll see you at this year's
Ready Safe Invitational
on August 14th in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Apparently he's a real asshole.
That was a really nice driver.
Pryce punched him in his face.
[speaks Spanish]
Pryce needs to be punched in the face
[speaks Spanish]
[sighs] So we're going directly
to the airport.
Mitts said he'll drop off our stuff
in a few days.
Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry about what happened, mi amor.
I didn't know what Pryce was up to.
No, if I did [scoffs]
I would not have been okay with it.
It's all good, mami.
No, mijo. [sucks teeth]
I shouldn't have let us
get mixed up in this.
I didn't protect you and you got hurt.
And for that I'm sorry.
But I just want to say,
Zero really liked you.
That was not an act.
I know they were not being honest
about the money, but the connection?
That was real.
Whatever.
I'm used to it. [chuckles] So
Used to what?
Nothing. Can we go? Can we just go?
Yeah, okay.
[speaking Spanish]
[in English] Tell me.
What do you mean you're used to it?
People liking me just for golf and shit.
Same as Dad.
[inhales deeply] No.
[speaks Spanish]
Your dad [scoffs]
Your dad had issues.
Has issues. Multiple,
many kind of issues.
But he loves you.
That's bullshit, Mom.
I fucking tested it.
You tested it?
Nothing. Never mind.
Is that why you stopped playing golf?
Look, I quit and he went ghost.
Remember, I told him I didn't want
to play in the Westview Qualifier,
and two weeks later he left.
Two weeks.
I was just a fucking golfer to him.
He didn't give a shit about me.
No, mi amor,
your dad didn't know how to show it.
Mom, don't make this something it's not.
Okay?
He's had three years.
[in Spanish] He knows where I am. [in
English] All he had to do was show up.
That's it.
But he didn't. [cries]
I was just a fucking golfer to him,
and it's the same with Pryce,
and it's the same with Zero.
[cries]
[in Spanish] They are all the same.
- Mi amor. Mi vida. Mi vida.
- No, mami.
[sighs deeply]
[Mitts, in English] All right.
[sighs] Where you gonna go?
Uh, I got a friend in Charlotte,
lined up a hosting gig.
- At a restaurant?
- Funeral home.
[chuckles] Okay, well,
I guess that tracks.
You know, everyone
in Santi's whole life revolves around him
like he's the fucking sun.
God forbid one of us actually do
something for ourself,
- you know?
- Hey, hey. That's not why he's upset.
Pryce offered me money in a moment
where I really needed it. Okay?
That doesn't make me a fake person.
He said that because he was hurt.
He's hurt? I'm hurt.
He called me a clown.
He said I was cosplaying my gender.
I mean, I fucking had sex with him.
That's like giving pussy
to the state of Florida.
[stammers] Okay.
That That's enough, okay?
I'm sorry my feelings
are making you uncomfortable.
No, it's just, like, he said
some things he shouldn't have.
He said I'm not a real person, Mitts.
Do you understand that?
Like, do you get that?
Yes. But sometimes
people say things that they
No, I don't need a lecture
from you right now, okay?
I just I need you to hear me.
- I need you to, like, hold space for me.
- Just You know what? Jesus.
Just shut the fuck up for a second,
all right? I'm your friend.
You can't tell your friends what to do
or when to listen or when to hold space,
whatever the fuck that is.
I mean, your whole generation
just exhausts me.
We can't just have a simple conversation.
Santi said some cruel shit.
I get it.
But you broke his trust.
Do you get that?
I mean, that happened first.
And you can try to work the math
by harping about what he said
and how it was unforgivable
and unacceptable,
but, the fact is, the kid is in pain.
And I know Pryce put you up to it.
Believe me.
And that's a whole other
fucking ball of wax.
But the bottom line is, you hurt him.
You didn't mean to, but you did.
And sometimes people who love each other
hurt each other at the same time.
I mean [scoffs]
Francine and I certainly did.
But, look, that's just part of life.
Still doesn't make it okay
for him to say what he said.
[chuckles] Oh, my God.
You're a tough customer.
Look, I think you have a good heart.
And, you know, I-I don't know,
I hope somehow you can learn
from this experience, you know. And
Do you [sighs] Do you need money?
- No.
- Nah, here, just
Seriously.
No. It just doesn't feel right.
Yeah, neither does eating food
in a bus station.
Just-Just take it.
Thanks.
[clicks tongue, crying]
I really liked him. [sniffles]
I know you did.
[groans] All right.
[sighs]
Bye, boomer.
- All right.
- [sighing]
And don't eat in there.
I'm serious.
I speak from experience.
[sighs]
But it's only an hour flight.
Also, why is this a problem?
It's not about flight time, ma'am.
One animal per passenger,
and they have to fit under the seat
in front of you.
Excuse me.
Attention, all passengers.
Flight 238 to Indianapolis
will be boarding at Gate A in 40 minutes.
Okay, look. [speaks Spanish]
- Coolio can come here with Amorcita.
- [snarls, whines]
And it's perfect. [speaks Spanish]
One animal per passenger.
If you'd like, one of them can ride
in baggage for $215.
What kind of Sophie's choice is that?
[speaks Spanish]
Look, look. Which one
am I supposed to put in storage?
- [speaks Spanish]
- I guess the one you like the least.
- [dog whines]
- [speaks Spanish]
[speaking Spanish]
Uh, I-I don't speak Spanish.
Ah. [chuckles] Perdón.
Wanna make a hundred bucks?
- Please?
- I'd like to make 300 bucks.
I know you're sad. Okay?
But this is what we're gonna do.
We are going to go home.
We're gonna go home.
I'll get my old job back.
And your senior year's coming up.
Maybe you can work
part-time at the store.
- Jojo's Party Bazaar?
- Mm-hmm.
Well, I mean, you'll have to
interview with the manager,
but I'll put in a good word.
[Elena chuckles]
If you still want to play, mi amor,
after all this, we can talk about it.
- [sighs]
- Maybe you try out for the school team.
Or you can coach kids.
We'll figure something out together.
Okay? [speaks Spanish]
[speaks Spanish, through clenched teeth]
[high-pitched voice]
Together, together, together, together.
[babbling]
Attention, all passengers,
we will now begin boarding Flight 238
to Indianapolis at Gate A.
Yo. Santi. Hey.
- Hey.
- Wh-What are you doing here, Pryce?
- I just want to talk to you for a sec.
- No, absolutely not.
You've done enough damage.
Leave my son alone.
- Elena, please, just two minutes.
- No, Pryce.
I would kill you right now,
- but there are cameras everywhere.
- Mom, it's okay.
- No, Santi.
- Mami. [speaks Spanish]
[sighs]
Listen, I [sighs]
I'm sorry for all the stuff
behind your back.
It was a jerk thing to do,
and I understand
you never wanting to see me again.
But I just wanted to tell you the truth
before you left.
The truth about what?
The best part about the past eight weeks
wasn't the golf,
it was the pickleball.
- [chuckles] Pickleball?
- Yeah.
And not just the pickleball.
I mean, the Mitts cooking
and us all sitting around
laughing and telling stories
and throwing marshmallows at each other.
And playing slapjack.
And you trying to drive the RV.
I mean, that was scary.
You're not a good driver.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that,
you're wrong.
I don't just care about the golf.
I don't give a shit about the golf.
I give a shit about you more.
Santi, we're boarding.
And I just wanted you
to hear that from me.
Okay?
You are my friend.
And that's got nothing to do with
how well you swing a golf club.
That's just how we met.
[Elena] Santi.
- [speaks Spanish]
- Okay. You better go.
And tell your mom I'm sorry.
I'm kinda scared to go near her.
- What did he want?
- Just said he was sorry.
[agent] Next passenger please.
[inhales sharply] Yeah.
[sighing]
[flight attendant] Hi, welcome aboard.
Hi, welcome aboard.
Perfect.
[speaks Spanish]
What are you doing? Come on.
Uh
Uh, I can't.
No, ey, ey, ey, ey, ey. [speaks Spanish]
- We're leaving.
- I need to talk to him.
- No, mijito, we're going.
- Sorry, sorry.
- Sorry. Excuse me.
- [speaks Spanish]
- Uh, miss, you need to board now.
- Yeah? I'll be Yeah.
Hijo, we're going.
No, I need to talk to Pryce!
No, Santi.
Santi!
[exhales sharply] Sorry. [panting]
[gasps] Ay, the dog. I need my dog.
- [huffs]
- I'm keeping my $300.
[Elena] Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
But I only bought it 'cause they made me
to get through security.
[agent] Yeah,
it's a nonrefundable ticket, sir.
It was just ten minutes ago.
- Wasn't there a grace period?
- Th No.
When did grace periods
stop being a thing?
- [Santi] Pryce!
- I mean
- Santi.
- Pryce. Pry Pryce. Pryce.
What are you doing?
You're gonna miss your flight.
Shit. [panting] Okay.
Look, I wanna keep playing.
I think you should keep playing.
No, I mean now.
Look, I-I-I
I can't go back to Indiana, you know,
wondering what I could have done.
I want to stay on the road. With you.
I-I want another shot.
We-We took our shot, Santi.
You walked off the US Amateur.
No, no, no. I'm not [chuckles]
I'm not talking about the Amateur.
[inhales deeply]
I'm talking about the show.
- The show? Yeah?
- Yeah. I've been thinking about it, okay?
I shot a 66 at Applebrook,
68 at Moorefield,
67 at Sandy Valley,
and at Crooked Stick
You were three under.
- I've got a zero handicap.
- I know. So?
[imitating Clark]
"Whether it's at home, at work,
or out on the golf course,
look, things don't always go as planned.
But with Ready Safe Insurance
True Form Protection Plan,
you'll always be ready to hit the next
shot."
- Yeah.
- You got it. That's good.
What are you talking about?
"I'll see you at this year's
Ready Safe Invitational
on August 14th in Tulsa, Oklahoma."
No, you can't be serious.
- Come on.
- Why not?
Because it's totally insane.
That's why not.
Insane but doable.
Right? I mean, you know the guy.
- Yeah, but [clears throat]
- [Elena] Santi!
[speaks Spanish]
- We're gonna miss the plane.
- Mami, no, no
- [speaks Spanish]
- I I can't go back, okay?
I can't go back. I-I wanna keep playing.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You're not gonna have
anything to do [speaks Spanish]
No, Mom.
- [sighs]
- Stop.
- [sighs]
- Okay?
- He lied to you.
- They were white lies.
And some of them,
I wouldn't even classify as that.
It's that gray area
Shut your mouth, Pryce.
[sighs] My job is to protect you.
And I'm not gonna risk
you getting hurt again.
So if you wanna play after you graduate,
we can talk about it.
But until then, no.
I don't wanna wait. I wanna do this now.
- No, you have to trust me.
- Mami, I want
- No, you need to trust me, mami.
- No.
Te amo, but I I can't
go back to Indiana.
I mean, there's nothing there for me.
- Please, I wanna keep going.
- [sighs]
[sighs]
[sighs]
What if something happens to you?
Something's definitely
gonna happen to me.
That's life.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[in Spanish] Are you sure?
I'm sure.
[sighs]
[speaks Spanish]
[in English] You hurt my son again
and I will fucking end you.
- Understand?
- Comprende. I Yes, ma'am. I understand.
[sighs]
So [sighs] what does this mean?
The Ready Safe Invitational?
Are you stupid?
PGA rules says that
anyone with a zero handicap
is eligible to play in a PGA event,
and I have a zero handicap.
Right, so all Santi needs
is a sponsor exemption.
Is he making this up?
No. It's a moon shot,
but technically it's possible.
Exemptions are given out all the time.
Oh, yeah. All the time.
Well, Tiger, Phil
Mickelson, Michelle Wie,
they all got exemptions as amateurs.
Nick Dunlap got one last year,
and he won the AMEX.
Mitts, did I or did I not
see my son devastado
in the middle of the Amateur
by this fucking guy?
Yeah, that's the pendejo. Right there.
And now you want him to play
in a professional golf tournament?
No, no. Hold on.
This is [chuckles] This is his idea.
This is your idea?
Yeah. [chuckles] Yeah.
[sighs, speaks Spanish]
I don't know which of you
is the bigger idiot.
Oh, that would be Pryce,
but Santi's running a close second.
Okay. The Ready Safe is next week, guys.
So if we're gonna do this,
we have to move on it.
Okay. [speaks Spanish]
But why the Ready Safe?
[Mitts scoffs]
- He knows.
- [sighs] Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Because Clark Ross hosts the event
and he can hand out [chuckling]
the exemptions.
- There you go.
- But I thought you two hated each other,
- so why would he give you an exemption?
- [chuckles]
Oh, he won't give him anything.
He wouldn't give me the time of day.
But sometimes somebody can be convinced.
- [Mitts chuckling] Oh, yeah.
- You know.
- Yes, I do know. [chuckles]
- Oh, okeydoke.
Wink-wink. Nudge-nudge.
- I get it. I get it. Yeah.
- Know what I mean?
There's that old twinkle.
- That old Mitts twinkle.
- Yeah.
[chuckles] But why is it so funny?
Ah, well, this would be the
biggest hustle we've ever pulled off
- in our illustrious career, my friend.
- Oh, indeed.
Oh, you're gonna hustle him.
No, no, we're gonna hustle him.
Like, we? Meaning me?
Meaning all of us.
Of course, to pull this off,
we are gonna need a roper.
- [sighs]
- Yeah, we got one.
[sighs]
[Santi] Hey, nomad.
[sighs]
[imitates whooshing]
[screams]
- [chuckles]
- I freeze you with my mutant powers.
I can't move.
[groaning, laughing]
I can't move. [groans]
Honey, please help me. I-I'm frozen.
- [chuckles]
- No talking! You frozen.
[Amber-Linn] You better zip it.
You heard Mutant Boy.
[chuckles] What am I supposed to do now?
Now you must pay for all your crimes.
Please, I have money in my wallet.
- If I can just reach it.
- You
No! You must pay with your life.
What? That's pretty aggressive.
- [imitates whooshing]
- No! [groans]
[chuckles] Oh, you've shattered me
in a million pieces. No!
Hey [grunts] Mutant Boy, wait!
Mutant Boy, I beg you,
don't leave me like this!
[stammers]
[Jett] Dad, I'm sorry. [sighs]
Jett, you upstairs?
What's going on?
I didn't mean to.
Is that Is that a
A brontosaurus.
- [Pryce sighs]
- [Jett] The largest of the quadrupeds.
Well, that explains the flooding.
- Mystery solved.
- [gasps] What happened?
Well, we have a brontosaurus
stuck in the toilet.
- Again?
- [Pryce grunts] Yeah.
Who knew that was their natural habitat?
Well, I mean, it is a sauropod.
But there are other aquatic dinosaurs,
you know?
- Like, um
- In this toilet?
- No! No, of course not. No.
- [sighs]
But the G.I. Joes, they were
trying to save the brontosaurus.
No. Jett, you can't send those guys
on a fool's mission like that.
That's
- Am I in trouble?
- Well
- Yeah!
- [grunts]
You gotta keep the dinosaurs
out of the toilet.
[strains] I think that's how
they became extinct in the first place.
No, they were wiped out by an asteroid.
That's another school of thought.
How do you know so much about dinosaurs?
Dad, I'm seven years old. I'm not a baby.
Wait.
You're seven?
[people laughing on TV]
[applause on TV]
[Pryce grunts]
[TV switches off]
[clears throat] Okay.
We need to talk about this.
I mean, what were you thinking?
Were you even thinking?
- I don't know.
- Where were you going?
Nowhere. We were just driving around.
Mrs. Anders said she saw you guys coming
out of the McDonald's drive-through.
Dylan needed a salad.
Well, I appreciate
that Dylan is health-conscious,
- but you cannot do that.
- [sighs]
I mean, do you know
how dangerous that is?
Especially at night.
Hey, don't ignore me. This is serious.
- Something could've happened to you guys.
- You're being dramatic.
Am I?
I think I'm being pretty
measured and cool
considering my 13-year-old
just took the car out for a joyride.
[sighs] Do you have to tell Mom?
What do you think?
- [groans]
- Hey.
Don't walk away from me.
We're not done here.
I said I was sorry.
[grunts] Did you? I didn't hear that.
Hey, don't walk away from me. Jett.
[people laughing, clamoring]
["Thinking of You" playing on speakers]
Hey. Frosty?
- Hey, Pryce. Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Why don't you just, like, tell her
you like her shirt?
- [groans]
- Girls love that.
- They wanna talk about their clothes.
- [scoffs]
- So embarrassing.
- What? No, it isn't.
Just grab a lemonade
and bring it over to her.
- [chuckles]
- No. Just
- What? No?
- No.
What about if you have her, like,
- do the limbo thing with you?
- [Pryce] Yeah.
[scoffs] You've got no game.
- [chuckles]
- I have game.
Ask your father. I have
- Your mom has serious game, okay?
- Yeah.
This is the Shaquille O'Neal
- of seduction.
- Wow.
- Seduction?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Please never say that word to me again.
What, you don't wanna
hear how your mom seduced me?
- How she's this siren, this temptress.
- [chuckles]
Dad. Ew.
[sighs] Okay, sorry.
Just go with the lemonade.
And just be yourself.
That's all the game you need.
[Pryce] He looks good.
Yeah. I'm impressed.
Uh-oh.
Passing the lemonade stand
- Okay
- rejecting Dad's idea.
Calling an audible.
- Target locked.
- Is he gonna move in?
[Amber-Linn whispers]
Come on, honey. You got this.
- Smile.
- Yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah.
- [Pryce whispers] It's working.
- They're really cute.
- Yeah.
- Okay, why is he walking?
- [stammers]
- He's retreating. [stammers]
- Wait, what's he Oh, God.
- [chuckles]
- Oh, he's doing push-ups.
[chuckles] Wait. I can't watch this.
- Why is he doing push-ups?
- Why?
- Why is he doing [chuckles]
- Why would you do
Wait, no, no, no.
[Amber-Linn gasps]
[Pryce whispers] It's working.
Push-ups worked.
- Oh, my God.
- He's got game like his mom.
- Who knew?
- [Amber-Linn shushes]
[gasps]
[partygoer] Hey, Pryce!
[music stops]
[Amber-Linn] Are you trying
to give me gray hair?
What's going on?
Your son and Conor
decided to give each other
- homemade tattoos with this.
- No. [sighs]
Did you even clean the needle? Do
you know this is how you get hepatitis?
Is that right? A or B?
All of 'em. All of the hepatitises.
- Who cares? Look at your son's shoulder.
- Dad, it was supposed to be
- it was supposed to be an eagle.
- [Pryce] Okay.
[chuckling] That doesn't look
like an eagle.
I know, Dad. Conor's an asshole.
He thought it'd be funny.
- I'm calling his mother.
- No.
No, no, no. Please don't call his mom.
- Please. Don't
- You have a dick on your shoulder!
And balls. But hold it. Let me see this.
- Let's not panic here.
- Wait.
- I might be able to fix it.
- Pryce, no. No!
Wait. Let me add a few strategic lines,
and we can repurpose this.
- Ow.
- Hold it.
- Ow! Ow, ow, ow!
- [gasps]
- Hold it, hold it.
- Babe! Babe!
What are you gonna do? Ow!
- You're actually tattooing our child.
- Hold on.
Yeah, I'm trying to save it.
Voilà.
What the hell is it?
It's a Civil War cannon.
You know, like he's a history buff.
It looks like a dick on wheels.
- [Pryce] You're out of your mind.
- [gasps] Dad!
- It does! Look at that.
- Dad!
- It looks good!
- [Jett] Oh, my God!
[Amber-Linn] Jett!
[rock music playing on speakers]
Hey! Hey, turn the music down!
I know you hear me!
Hey, you're not the only one
who lives here.
Jett! Jett! Hey! Hey. [scoffs]
- Oh, hey, Dad.
- Did you not hear me?
- Uh, no.
- Yeah 'cause your music's too loud.
Come on, you gotta turn it down.
That's gonna screw up your hearing.
Okay, yeah, sorry.
[sighs] How's it going?
[sighs] Pretty good.
Um. Got almost everything.
I have to put some some of this stuff
in the garage though, I think.
[sighs] God,
it feels really empty in here.
Yeah. [chuckles]
What are you gonna do with this?
Uh, throw away.
No way.
- Yeah.
- Jett, you can't get rid of this.
Dad, come on. Not you too.
What?
Don't get all weepy and shit like Mom.
I never let myself imagine this.
[chuckles] It's just college.
[sighs deeply]
I
I didn't get enough time with you,
Mutant Boy.
- [imitates laser]
- [groans] You got me.
[chuckles] Okay, you're unfrozen.
Would you mind helping me
take this downstairs?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
What if I never see you again?
Dad, I'm gonna be, like,
three hours away, okay?
Well, let's do something together
before you go.
Yeah, I I have plans.
I'm meeting the guys tonight.
- You can't go.
- What?
It's Julian's last night
before he goes to Notre Dame.
Jett, you gotta stay with us.
But, Dad, come on. I have plans.
I know, but we've got plans with you.
Do you ever think about that?
Jett, your mom and I have plans.
And do you ever think about
what you leaving would do to her?
Mom's gonna be all right.
- What about me?
- Dad.
What if I'm not gonna be all right?
- [zips bag]
- You'll be fine. Okay?
I mean, what's that thing
you're always telling me?
- It-It's, uh, Grossweiner's law, right?
- Yeah.
You gotta let the past go.
Yeah, I'm scared to do that.
You gotta focus on the moment, Dad.
It's the only thing you can control.
[sighs]
[child] Where's your son?
My son?
The pickleball kid.
No, he's not my son.
Uh, he left.
Is that why you were crying?
[sighs]
Uh, maybe.
[grunts]
- [child] Hmm.
- [sighing]
You want an orange juice?
Sure.
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
[theme song playing]
- [Mitts] Hello?
- Hey. Did you know?
Did you know what Pryce
was doing with Zero?
I did not know about the money.
He broke his heart, Mitts.
I know.
Well, I've been on record several times,
the man's an asshole.
- Where is he?
- No idea.
But he's like a dog,
he'll show up the last place he was fed.
[Elena] Okay, where are you going?
- I'm taking Zero to the bus station.
- Mm-hmm.
I need you to do me a favor.
But with Ready Safe Insurance's
True Form Protection Plan,
you'll always be ready
to hit the next shot.
I'll see you at this year's
Ready Safe Invitational
on August 14th in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Apparently he's a real asshole.
That was a really nice driver.
Pryce punched him in his face.
[speaks Spanish]
Pryce needs to be punched in the face
[speaks Spanish]
[sighs] So we're going directly
to the airport.
Mitts said he'll drop off our stuff
in a few days.
Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry about what happened, mi amor.
I didn't know what Pryce was up to.
No, if I did [scoffs]
I would not have been okay with it.
It's all good, mami.
No, mijo. [sucks teeth]
I shouldn't have let us
get mixed up in this.
I didn't protect you and you got hurt.
And for that I'm sorry.
But I just want to say,
Zero really liked you.
That was not an act.
I know they were not being honest
about the money, but the connection?
That was real.
Whatever.
I'm used to it. [chuckles] So
Used to what?
Nothing. Can we go? Can we just go?
Yeah, okay.
[speaking Spanish]
[in English] Tell me.
What do you mean you're used to it?
People liking me just for golf and shit.
Same as Dad.
[inhales deeply] No.
[speaks Spanish]
Your dad [scoffs]
Your dad had issues.
Has issues. Multiple,
many kind of issues.
But he loves you.
That's bullshit, Mom.
I fucking tested it.
You tested it?
Nothing. Never mind.
Is that why you stopped playing golf?
Look, I quit and he went ghost.
Remember, I told him I didn't want
to play in the Westview Qualifier,
and two weeks later he left.
Two weeks.
I was just a fucking golfer to him.
He didn't give a shit about me.
No, mi amor,
your dad didn't know how to show it.
Mom, don't make this something it's not.
Okay?
He's had three years.
[in Spanish] He knows where I am. [in
English] All he had to do was show up.
That's it.
But he didn't. [cries]
I was just a fucking golfer to him,
and it's the same with Pryce,
and it's the same with Zero.
[cries]
[in Spanish] They are all the same.
- Mi amor. Mi vida. Mi vida.
- No, mami.
[sighs deeply]
[Mitts, in English] All right.
[sighs] Where you gonna go?
Uh, I got a friend in Charlotte,
lined up a hosting gig.
- At a restaurant?
- Funeral home.
[chuckles] Okay, well,
I guess that tracks.
You know, everyone
in Santi's whole life revolves around him
like he's the fucking sun.
God forbid one of us actually do
something for ourself,
- you know?
- Hey, hey. That's not why he's upset.
Pryce offered me money in a moment
where I really needed it. Okay?
That doesn't make me a fake person.
He said that because he was hurt.
He's hurt? I'm hurt.
He called me a clown.
He said I was cosplaying my gender.
I mean, I fucking had sex with him.
That's like giving pussy
to the state of Florida.
[stammers] Okay.
That That's enough, okay?
I'm sorry my feelings
are making you uncomfortable.
No, it's just, like, he said
some things he shouldn't have.
He said I'm not a real person, Mitts.
Do you understand that?
Like, do you get that?
Yes. But sometimes
people say things that they
No, I don't need a lecture
from you right now, okay?
I just I need you to hear me.
- I need you to, like, hold space for me.
- Just You know what? Jesus.
Just shut the fuck up for a second,
all right? I'm your friend.
You can't tell your friends what to do
or when to listen or when to hold space,
whatever the fuck that is.
I mean, your whole generation
just exhausts me.
We can't just have a simple conversation.
Santi said some cruel shit.
I get it.
But you broke his trust.
Do you get that?
I mean, that happened first.
And you can try to work the math
by harping about what he said
and how it was unforgivable
and unacceptable,
but, the fact is, the kid is in pain.
And I know Pryce put you up to it.
Believe me.
And that's a whole other
fucking ball of wax.
But the bottom line is, you hurt him.
You didn't mean to, but you did.
And sometimes people who love each other
hurt each other at the same time.
I mean [scoffs]
Francine and I certainly did.
But, look, that's just part of life.
Still doesn't make it okay
for him to say what he said.
[chuckles] Oh, my God.
You're a tough customer.
Look, I think you have a good heart.
And, you know, I-I don't know,
I hope somehow you can learn
from this experience, you know. And
Do you [sighs] Do you need money?
- No.
- Nah, here, just
Seriously.
No. It just doesn't feel right.
Yeah, neither does eating food
in a bus station.
Just-Just take it.
Thanks.
[clicks tongue, crying]
I really liked him. [sniffles]
I know you did.
[groans] All right.
[sighs]
Bye, boomer.
- All right.
- [sighing]
And don't eat in there.
I'm serious.
I speak from experience.
[sighs]
But it's only an hour flight.
Also, why is this a problem?
It's not about flight time, ma'am.
One animal per passenger,
and they have to fit under the seat
in front of you.
Excuse me.
Attention, all passengers.
Flight 238 to Indianapolis
will be boarding at Gate A in 40 minutes.
Okay, look. [speaks Spanish]
- Coolio can come here with Amorcita.
- [snarls, whines]
And it's perfect. [speaks Spanish]
One animal per passenger.
If you'd like, one of them can ride
in baggage for $215.
What kind of Sophie's choice is that?
[speaks Spanish]
Look, look. Which one
am I supposed to put in storage?
- [speaks Spanish]
- I guess the one you like the least.
- [dog whines]
- [speaks Spanish]
[speaking Spanish]
Uh, I-I don't speak Spanish.
Ah. [chuckles] Perdón.
Wanna make a hundred bucks?
- Please?
- I'd like to make 300 bucks.
I know you're sad. Okay?
But this is what we're gonna do.
We are going to go home.
We're gonna go home.
I'll get my old job back.
And your senior year's coming up.
Maybe you can work
part-time at the store.
- Jojo's Party Bazaar?
- Mm-hmm.
Well, I mean, you'll have to
interview with the manager,
but I'll put in a good word.
[Elena chuckles]
If you still want to play, mi amor,
after all this, we can talk about it.
- [sighs]
- Maybe you try out for the school team.
Or you can coach kids.
We'll figure something out together.
Okay? [speaks Spanish]
[speaks Spanish, through clenched teeth]
[high-pitched voice]
Together, together, together, together.
[babbling]
Attention, all passengers,
we will now begin boarding Flight 238
to Indianapolis at Gate A.
Yo. Santi. Hey.
- Hey.
- Wh-What are you doing here, Pryce?
- I just want to talk to you for a sec.
- No, absolutely not.
You've done enough damage.
Leave my son alone.
- Elena, please, just two minutes.
- No, Pryce.
I would kill you right now,
- but there are cameras everywhere.
- Mom, it's okay.
- No, Santi.
- Mami. [speaks Spanish]
[sighs]
Listen, I [sighs]
I'm sorry for all the stuff
behind your back.
It was a jerk thing to do,
and I understand
you never wanting to see me again.
But I just wanted to tell you the truth
before you left.
The truth about what?
The best part about the past eight weeks
wasn't the golf,
it was the pickleball.
- [chuckles] Pickleball?
- Yeah.
And not just the pickleball.
I mean, the Mitts cooking
and us all sitting around
laughing and telling stories
and throwing marshmallows at each other.
And playing slapjack.
And you trying to drive the RV.
I mean, that was scary.
You're not a good driver.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that,
you're wrong.
I don't just care about the golf.
I don't give a shit about the golf.
I give a shit about you more.
Santi, we're boarding.
And I just wanted you
to hear that from me.
Okay?
You are my friend.
And that's got nothing to do with
how well you swing a golf club.
That's just how we met.
[Elena] Santi.
- [speaks Spanish]
- Okay. You better go.
And tell your mom I'm sorry.
I'm kinda scared to go near her.
- What did he want?
- Just said he was sorry.
[agent] Next passenger please.
[inhales sharply] Yeah.
[sighing]
[flight attendant] Hi, welcome aboard.
Hi, welcome aboard.
Perfect.
[speaks Spanish]
What are you doing? Come on.
Uh
Uh, I can't.
No, ey, ey, ey, ey, ey. [speaks Spanish]
- We're leaving.
- I need to talk to him.
- No, mijito, we're going.
- Sorry, sorry.
- Sorry. Excuse me.
- [speaks Spanish]
- Uh, miss, you need to board now.
- Yeah? I'll be Yeah.
Hijo, we're going.
No, I need to talk to Pryce!
No, Santi.
Santi!
[exhales sharply] Sorry. [panting]
[gasps] Ay, the dog. I need my dog.
- [huffs]
- I'm keeping my $300.
[Elena] Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
But I only bought it 'cause they made me
to get through security.
[agent] Yeah,
it's a nonrefundable ticket, sir.
It was just ten minutes ago.
- Wasn't there a grace period?
- Th No.
When did grace periods
stop being a thing?
- [Santi] Pryce!
- I mean
- Santi.
- Pryce. Pry Pryce. Pryce.
What are you doing?
You're gonna miss your flight.
Shit. [panting] Okay.
Look, I wanna keep playing.
I think you should keep playing.
No, I mean now.
Look, I-I-I
I can't go back to Indiana, you know,
wondering what I could have done.
I want to stay on the road. With you.
I-I want another shot.
We-We took our shot, Santi.
You walked off the US Amateur.
No, no, no. I'm not [chuckles]
I'm not talking about the Amateur.
[inhales deeply]
I'm talking about the show.
- The show? Yeah?
- Yeah. I've been thinking about it, okay?
I shot a 66 at Applebrook,
68 at Moorefield,
67 at Sandy Valley,
and at Crooked Stick
You were three under.
- I've got a zero handicap.
- I know. So?
[imitating Clark]
"Whether it's at home, at work,
or out on the golf course,
look, things don't always go as planned.
But with Ready Safe Insurance
True Form Protection Plan,
you'll always be ready to hit the next
shot."
- Yeah.
- You got it. That's good.
What are you talking about?
"I'll see you at this year's
Ready Safe Invitational
on August 14th in Tulsa, Oklahoma."
No, you can't be serious.
- Come on.
- Why not?
Because it's totally insane.
That's why not.
Insane but doable.
Right? I mean, you know the guy.
- Yeah, but [clears throat]
- [Elena] Santi!
[speaks Spanish]
- We're gonna miss the plane.
- Mami, no, no
- [speaks Spanish]
- I I can't go back, okay?
I can't go back. I-I wanna keep playing.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You're not gonna have
anything to do [speaks Spanish]
No, Mom.
- [sighs]
- Stop.
- [sighs]
- Okay?
- He lied to you.
- They were white lies.
And some of them,
I wouldn't even classify as that.
It's that gray area
Shut your mouth, Pryce.
[sighs] My job is to protect you.
And I'm not gonna risk
you getting hurt again.
So if you wanna play after you graduate,
we can talk about it.
But until then, no.
I don't wanna wait. I wanna do this now.
- No, you have to trust me.
- Mami, I want
- No, you need to trust me, mami.
- No.
Te amo, but I I can't
go back to Indiana.
I mean, there's nothing there for me.
- Please, I wanna keep going.
- [sighs]
[sighs]
[sighs]
What if something happens to you?
Something's definitely
gonna happen to me.
That's life.
[sighs]
[sighs]
[in Spanish] Are you sure?
I'm sure.
[sighs]
[speaks Spanish]
[in English] You hurt my son again
and I will fucking end you.
- Understand?
- Comprende. I Yes, ma'am. I understand.
[sighs]
So [sighs] what does this mean?
The Ready Safe Invitational?
Are you stupid?
PGA rules says that
anyone with a zero handicap
is eligible to play in a PGA event,
and I have a zero handicap.
Right, so all Santi needs
is a sponsor exemption.
Is he making this up?
No. It's a moon shot,
but technically it's possible.
Exemptions are given out all the time.
Oh, yeah. All the time.
Well, Tiger, Phil
Mickelson, Michelle Wie,
they all got exemptions as amateurs.
Nick Dunlap got one last year,
and he won the AMEX.
Mitts, did I or did I not
see my son devastado
in the middle of the Amateur
by this fucking guy?
Yeah, that's the pendejo. Right there.
And now you want him to play
in a professional golf tournament?
No, no. Hold on.
This is [chuckles] This is his idea.
This is your idea?
Yeah. [chuckles] Yeah.
[sighs, speaks Spanish]
I don't know which of you
is the bigger idiot.
Oh, that would be Pryce,
but Santi's running a close second.
Okay. The Ready Safe is next week, guys.
So if we're gonna do this,
we have to move on it.
Okay. [speaks Spanish]
But why the Ready Safe?
[Mitts scoffs]
- He knows.
- [sighs] Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Because Clark Ross hosts the event
and he can hand out [chuckling]
the exemptions.
- There you go.
- But I thought you two hated each other,
- so why would he give you an exemption?
- [chuckles]
Oh, he won't give him anything.
He wouldn't give me the time of day.
But sometimes somebody can be convinced.
- [Mitts chuckling] Oh, yeah.
- You know.
- Yes, I do know. [chuckles]
- Oh, okeydoke.
Wink-wink. Nudge-nudge.
- I get it. I get it. Yeah.
- Know what I mean?
There's that old twinkle.
- That old Mitts twinkle.
- Yeah.
[chuckles] But why is it so funny?
Ah, well, this would be the
biggest hustle we've ever pulled off
- in our illustrious career, my friend.
- Oh, indeed.
Oh, you're gonna hustle him.
No, no, we're gonna hustle him.
Like, we? Meaning me?
Meaning all of us.
Of course, to pull this off,
we are gonna need a roper.
- [sighs]
- Yeah, we got one.
[sighs]
[Santi] Hey, nomad.
[sighs]