Dan Da Dan (2024) s01e09 Episode Script

[gasps] An Acrobatic Silky?
[groans]
[Aira, as Acrobatic Silky] Ouch! [yelps]
[Aira gasps] Are you hurt?
-[Okarun, weakly] Yeah.
-[screams]
I can see your boy bits!
Exposing yourself to me
can only mean one thing!
You wanna take our relationship
to the next level!
Very well!
[Serpoian 1] Pardon me, female human.
The only way you can enter our void
is if you have powers like his.
We will take your banana organs too.
-[demon] Off to work!
-Wait! Time out!
-Let me put some clothes on!
-Defects… ♪
-I can handle him, Master Takakura.
-Fine, fine, fine… ♪
Covered in defects, covered in badness
Fine, fine, fine ♪
Yep, it's fine, all good
And now to get to work… ♪
Yikes.
[Serpoian 1] Serpogrammetry!
[demon shrieks]
[splashing]
Boss, please.
Wait till I clear before you attack.
[Serpoian 1] You are just cheap labor.
We can replace you anytime.
[Aira] What was that?
It felt like I slammed into a wall.
-[gasps]
-[demon] Kapow!
Chiquitita, you have a dream
Shine for you! ♪
Chiquitita, you wake from a dream
Shine for you ♪
-[Okarun yelps]
-This song's… ♪
-[yelps]
-This song's… ♪
-[wails]
-This song's… ♪
-[Okarun] I can't find anything to wear!
-[demon] Jet punch!
-Huh?
-[crashing]
[glass smashing]
[Aira] A respectable punch.
Thank you.
But if it does not connect,
it is quite worthless.
[demon] Kapow!
[grunts]
TAKAKURA
-[Aira gasps]
-[Serpoian 1] Serpogrammetry!
[demon] Please watch it!
[Aira] Out of my way.
What is this, good sir?
Are you trying to court me?
-[demon] What?
-[Aira] Apologies.
My heart is currently set on someone else.
However, I will give you as many chances
as you wish to conquer me.
That, good sir…
[demon sneers]
[groans]
[Aira] …is the privilege
of a refined lady.
[demon] Hey, my head's stuck!
[Aira] Now for that other pest.
[screams]
You've been caught, female human.
What the heck? It… it's crushing me!
You are surprised because I used my power
without saying
"Serpogrammetry" first, yes?
[Aira] What does that matter?
I caught you off guard
because you did not expect that.
-It was the point.
-I don't care! I just want you to stop!
To find multiple humans
with special powers in the same location
is most interesting.
It gives us hope that our evolution
will advance as much as yours.
-[splashing]
-[gasps]
-Your speed and agility are remarkable.
-Other than that, your power is lacking.
No more words. Since you are here,
we will take your banana organs too.
You're not taking anything from me.
I happen to be the chosen one!
Soon, heaven will shine its light on me--
-[gasps]
-[demon] Yaah!
-[high-pitched ringing]
-[explosion]
[yelps]
[coughing]
You are correct, female human.
You are the chosen one.
Chosen to aid our evolution.
[all] Commence harvesting.
[Okarun] Hold on a second!
[breathing shakily]
You were after me before.
Well, here I am. Come and get me.
[Aira] Oh my gosh!
Put some clothes on already.
As long as I go all out,
I don't need clothes!
Yo, could this suck any worse?
We still want to harvest
your banana organs, male human.
However…
[Serpoian 2] …with three of us
doing the harvesting…
[Serpoian 3] …we can do you both
simultaneously.
[Okarun grunts] Damn it.
I can't transform.
By combining our psychokinesis,
we can create…
[all] …the Awesome Zone!
[whirring]
-Being inside…
-…makes changing…
-…or even standing…
-…impossible.
-But…
-…it has…
-…one…
-…tiny…
…shortcoming.
[all] We are not able to enter it.
-Therefore…
-[clanking]
[demon grunts]
[Serpoian 1] Our gig worker here
will beat you until you are unconscious.
Stop it! You're gonna kill him doing that!
Stop it! Please!
[demon straining]
-[grunts]
-[zapping]
[demon shrieks] Please!
[Serpoians gasp]
[Serpoian 1] He broke right through
the Awesome Zone!
[Serpoian 2] No, he did not.
It seems our psychokinesis is
being repelled by another.
[Serpoian 2 gasps] The other female human!
Momo, your timin's off the hook.
You dumbass!
See what you get
for makin' out with that bitch?
Well, lookee here.
I remember your dead buddies.
[all whimpering]
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
[rap lyrics in Japanese]
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan, Dan Da Dan ♪
Uh… uh…
EPISODE 9
MERGE! SERPO DOVER DEMON NESSIE!
-[Okarun] Man, I'm so glad to see you.
-[Momo] Shut up! Don't look at me, jerk!
[Serpoian 1] We told it
to keep the female human busy.
[Serpoian 2] Until we harvested
the male human's banana organs.
[Serpoian 3] What is it doing? Sleeping?
[Aira] That you have rescued me
annoys me to no end,
but we need your devilish skills.
You got Acro-Silky's power?
[Aira] I'll cooperate, but I'll not let
you have Master Ken Takakura!
-[Momo whimpers]
-[Okarun] Miss Ayase!
[Aira] What the heck are you doing?
You gotta block their power with yours,
or we're toast!
I do not know how,
but we have the advantage again.
Let us use it to awaken the gig worker.
Hey! Get to work, you,
or we will cut your pay.
[demon] Sorry, boss.
I need to take a break.
-Honestly, you are such a bother.
-[clicking]
-[clanking]
-[demon] No! Not that! [whimpers]
-Stop, please…
-[powers down]
[in Japanese] Yellow and black
Are symbols of bravery ♪
Can you keep fighting for 24 hours? ♪
[demon] Regain, Regain, our Regain ♪
A symbol of bravery in my suitcase ♪
Can you fight in a world far away? ♪
Businessman, businessman! ♪
Japanese businessman! ♪
-[energy pulses]
-[Okarun grunts]
[both groan]
-[Serpoian 1] That's it.
-[Serpoian 2] Punch away.
-[Serpoian 1] Do not stop.
-[Serpoian 2] Until they are unconscious.
[all gasp]
[Momo] You are the dumbest skank.
[both gasp]
Say that name again,
and you're dead.
-Yikes!
-She is repelling our psychic powers.
Gig worker, beat
that female human senseless!
[Aira] Oh, no he will not.
He shall deal with me first.
[Okarun] This sucks.
[Aira] As long as she restrains
your powers, we have the upper hand.
[demon] Salary uppercut!
[Aira grunts]
I didn't see it hit her.
That thing's no joke.
[demon] Mantis!
[gasps in surprise]
-It missed!
-Huh?
Yo, shrimpy.
I can totally see your punches.
-Mantis!
-[Aira grunts]
[wails]
[Aira] Earlier, your employer said
my powers were… lacking.
However, a few taps on your weak spot
were all it took to beat you.
I am one with Master Takakura!
Hold up. Don't get that close.
You make an easier target
when you're like that.
Jealous much?
Bitch, please.
[Okarun] Great advice, Momo.
And I need it. I'm an awkward guy.
[Momo] Jerk!
-You tryin' to get killed here?
-Sorry, Miss Ayase.
Jeez, would you get a grip?
You're the one in charge
of keeping their weird power off of us.
You are a useless employee.
You will receive a 60% pay cut.
Huh? Oh, come on.
[Serpoians] Huh?
[yelps]
[gasps] What happened?
-[Aira shrieks] A flood!
-[Okarun] I can't touch the bottom.
Oh no! He'll drown!
[gasps]
Uh…
[gasps]
Guys, the whole school's
made of water now!
[all gasp]
Uh-oh.
[low growling]
[Momo] Crap.
It's here.
Crap, crap, crap!
Come on. We need to go.
[Aira] 'Scuse me.
You're not calling the shots here.
I'm the leader.
It's Nessie!
[Aira] Oh my gosh,
he looks so cute when he's excited.
Dumbasses!
Wait. This is Kamigoe,
so we should call it "Kamissie."
That does it. Have fun
goin' full-on nerd over it. Bye!
-Whoa!
-So, that's a Nessie?
Tell me more about it.
[Serpoian 2] Explain yourself.
You had one job.
You did not keep
the female human busy as instructed.
60% pay cut for--
[Seropians] Huh?
[both] Huh?
-[screaming]
-How dare you?
Nessie's not a good guy!
-[Seropian 2] Do not attack us!
-You figured that out?
-[Serpoian 3] Hurry after that female!
-[Aira] Wait for me, Takakura--
[both gasp]
Oh no!
[Momo] Uh…
He did that?
Business punch!
[both screaming]
[Momo] He punches harder
when he's underwater!
[Okarun] He's like an alien mantis shrimp!
He's a Mantisian!
-[panting]
-Mantis! Mantis!
In water's where
yours truly's got the edge.
My punches are
ten times stronger underwater…
[babbling]
[both] Huh?
[demon yelping]
[panting]
They are bad.
[Momo] Can't breathe underwater, though.
Time to die.
Torpedo him. You'll swim fast
with Turbo G's leg strength.
I hate this.
[gasps]
I almost drowned!
It's no good.
-I don't think Turbo Granny can swim!
-[Momo] Huh?
-[demon] I can.
-Huh?
[both screaming]
[Momo] What the hell are we gonna do now?
How are we supposed to fight this guy?
[Okarun] Don't ask me! I don't know!
[Momo] We better figure
something out fast,
or that stupid skank's gonna
drown for sure.
[Okarun] Why don't you use your power?
[Momo] If she was right above me,
I could grab her.
But I can't get close 'cause of that goon.
[Okarun] Then I'll get his attention
and draw him away.
As soon as I do, you save her.
[Momo] What, are you crazy?
If you get near him,
you'll end up stuck, same as that idiot!
Things are hard enough
without your lame ideas.
How can you say that to me?
I'm trying to think
of ways to help, that's all.
You ain't helpin' jack.
You're causin' more trouble.
Why didn't you run when I told you to?
We're screwed 'cause
you guys were making out!
-We weren't making out!
-Oh, you were so makin' out!
-I totally saw you on top of her.
-Gah, I knew that was bothering you!
-It's not!
I don't give a damn if your lyin' ass is
makin' out with that skank.
[Okarun] Okay! Hold on!
If you care and you're upset,
then just come out and say it.
I can explain everything,
but you need to give me a chance to.
I don't care if others get
the wrong idea about what happened.
But if it's you, I couldn't stand it.
All that matters to me is
that you understand.
[gentle music playing]
Get your hands off me, you perv.
Okay. Sorry.
Sayin' all that while naked.
-[clang]
-[both gasp]
Watch out!
[water bubbling]
[Okarun gasps]
Sorry! I had to touch you there.
I won't do it again.
-[gasps] That's it!
-What?
-Okarun, stay still.
-Uh…
-[demon] I'm pooped.
-[Okarun gulps]
-[gasps]
-[Momo] This might work.
Resistance is futile!
[gasps] What the hell are you doing?
[Momo] If I handle you
like a slippery fish,
grabbin' and squeezin'
with my ghost hands,
I can make you haul ass through the water.
And then I can ride you!
You're wasting time!
You can't escape my punches!
-Up we go!
-[Okarun straining]
[Momo yells]
[all panting]
Yeah. Uh…
Nice one.
-You are a genius.
-[Momo] I know.
Come on, dumbass. Wake up!
She swallowed a lot of water.
I'm gonna wring it outta her.
Don't hate me.
[coughs]
-You did it! You saved her!
-[Aira coughing]
Was I dreaming?
[Momo] No, ya dummy.
We're still in danger here.
Come on, strip.
It'll be easier to move us in the water.
What? I'm not getting naked in front
of a boy till my wedding night!
[Momo] Strip!
Escaping up ain't fair.
Uh… uh-oh. I, uh, have them cornered.
I almost got 'em. Ju… just need more time.
[shrieks] Boss! What happened?
[Serpoian 2] You are all
completely useless!
Your co-worker has amazing power,
but they are so stupid,
they attack indiscriminately.
Your attacks are more effective
when you are submerged.
But you must surface to breathe,
allowing your targets to escape.
-[demon] I'm sorry!
-[Serpoian 2] Enough is enough.
-We must consolidate.
-[demon panting]
[Serpoian 2] These party cables will
successfully facilitate our merger.
BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR PETS
UNTIL THE END!
Now you have
to accept responsibility and propose,
'cause you saw me in my lingerie.
[Okarun] Did not!
[Momo] The sight of you in lingerie is
worth less than a pack of gum.
Cut the crap!
Keep your mind on the mission.
If we can't work together
as a team, we're dead.
-[Okarun] Right.
You're not the leader. I am.
-But you're right.
-Ready!
-And… goin' down.
-[Okarun gasps]
[heavy electronic music playing]
[growling]
[squeals]
Uh…
[Okarun wailing]
[Serpoian 2 screeching]
[Okarun straining]
[Serpoian 2] What a shame.
We ran out of water.
[all gasping]
-Too close!
-The heck? What was that?
[whirring]
[Okarun] Look!
It's sucking water into its neck.
[Aira] It's reloading its laser.
[Momo] Then all we have to do is
break its neck.
That way, it can't shoot at us anymore.
-[Okarun] Let's do it.
-[Aira] Now's our chance.
Let's get closer and attack!
Mmm, mmm! Mmm!
Uh…
[muffled yell]
[grunts]
Did you think the high-compression
water blast was our only weapon?
We might not look it,
but we are a close-combat in-fighter!
-[crashing]
-[all wailing]
-[whirring]
-[gasps]
[energy surging]
[Aira whimpers]
Oh!
-[Okarun yelps]
-[Momo grunts]
Get a grip. I got you now.
-You okay?
-[Aira coughing]
Uh-uh! I hurt all over!
Oh, good. You're okay, then.
[Aira] That thing has
the punchy shrimp guy's arms.
How'd that happen?
How can we get close enough to attack it?
[Momo] Those damn Serpoians.
They brought the punching dude
to compensated
for how big and slow Nessie is.
What do we do?
Between the laser beams
and mantis punches,
on dry land, we'd have a chance,
but in the water, we're dead meat.
That's it! What you said just now.
The part about being dead meat?
[Momo] No, you dork.
The punches. The mantis punches!
[Serpoian 2] What a shame.
Our high-compression
water blast has depleted.
However, we have countless
other ways to kill you.
We have determined you are dangerous,
and will dissect you for study.
We could wait for you to drown,
but that would take too much time.
Would you mind
if we beat you to death instead?
[water surges]
[energetic music playing]
Wh… what is this? What happened?
You screwed up. You shouldn't
have fused with that Mantisian dude.
A mantis shrimp's punch
is strongest when it's underwater.
But out of the water,
it can't put all it's got behind a punch.
Same with him.
If he'd have punched full-force,
he woulda ended up like you,
broke all to hell
thanks to his natural ability.
Let me take you there… ♪
[power hums]
[Serpoian 2] I can survive
underwater like this for hours.
-But you cannot.
-[gasps]
[groans]
[Serpoian 2] You will either drown,
or be bisected
by our high-compression water blast.
[sucking]
[groans]
[Okarun] I can't swim when I'm like this.
But if I got a path to run on,
I can go all out.
[Serpoian 2] Uh, hold on, now.
[groans]
[whimpers]
Let me take you there ♪
Let me take you there ♪
[gulping]
[muffled yelling]
[Okarun grunting]
Aah!
[music fades]
[coughs]
[gasps]
-[Okarun coughing]
-[Momo panting]
[Momo] We're back!
[both sighing and laughing]
[Momo] We beat 'em!
[sighs]
Oh, I feel solid ground!
It's the hallway!
Hallway, I love you.
-[Okarun sighs]
-Thank you for being solid.
[both laugh]
-[sighs]
-What are you talking about?
[both laugh]
I don't know.
Whatevs.
[both chuckle]
-[boy 1] Whoa. You seein' this?
-[both gasp]
[boy 2] They're lying on each other,
both naked!
[boy 3] Yes, they're nude,
they're totally boning!
[screaming]
[both wailing]
[Aira shrieking]
[boy 1] Holy crap! Shiratori's naked too!
-[boy 2] What's goin' on?
-[boy 3] Why are they naked?
[lively music playing]
[song in Japanese playing]
Any resemblance to actual persons
or organizations in this work of fiction
(Ken Takakura included) is coincidental.
[Okarun] Seeing Nessie was awesome!
Wonder if it's a plesiosaur?
And fused with an alien?
That's a super awesome combo!
An alien merging with a UMA
is a dream come true for me!
[Aira] You're smart, Takakura!
[Okarun] Next time, "Have You Ever Seen
a Cattle Mutilation?"
[Momo] Things are getting weirder!
I hate it!