Johnny Test (2005) s01e09 Episode Script

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
Johnny got a head
Of fiery hair ♪
And a turbo-charged backpack ♪
His genius sisters
Use him like a lab rat ♪
A neat-freak dad at home ♪
A super-busy mom ♪
The boy's best friend
Is a talking dog ♪
-Talking dog ♪
-That's right ♪
Three extreme teens
And an air-breathing shark ♪
Mega-action game controller
Skating in the park ♪
A Phero-Booster, Bling-Bling ♪
What do we make of this? ♪
Johnny Test ♪
Johnny Test ♪
This is the life of a boy
Named Johnny Test ♪
Johnny Test ♪
Johnny Test ♪
This is the life of a boy ♪
Named Johnny Test ♪
(FIREWORKS WHISTLE,
RAPID EXPLOSIONS)
LILIA:
Hurry up.
We don't want to be late
for the Mega Institute
Science Expo.
And I've saved space
on the trophy cabinet
in case you girls win
first prize
again.
LILIA: Are you looking
for your shoe, dear?
No-- Johnny.
I can't find him anywhere.
Oh, I think I saw him
heading towards the girls' lab.
BOTH:
He's in the lab?
And to make the fine salsa
which we put on the nachos
which we put in our bellies,
we must first
put the ingredients
in this big thing.
Check me if I'm wrong, Johnny,
but I don't think
a nuclear cell splitter
-is the right way to make salsa.
-Sure it is.
I just push this thing
that says cot-tee-on
and let there be salsa.
(BEEPS, SPLITTER WHIRRING)
SUSAN AND MARY:
Johnny, get out of the lab!
We're going to be late for the--
TWINS:
Science Expo.
MAN:
And now presenting
last year's winners,
the, oh-so-sweet
and gum-chewing
Susan and Mary Test.
(APPLAUSE)
Stop licking me.
Come on, you're covered
in spicy salsa goodness.
Presenting
the Electrochromatic Blanket.
(LAUGHS)
There is nothing there.
You lose.
You must have an experiment
to qualify, and you--
By bending light rays around
its ultra-reflective material,
it makes anyone
or anything invisible.
MAN:
You win again.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)
Not so fast, Professor,
for it is I, Bling-Bling Boy,
and I am the one
who will win this expo.
-Presenting
-(CRASHES)
Repto-slicer.
A major advancement
in genetic reptilian
pet evolution.
Big deal-- a lizard. Boo!
(GROWLS, WHIRRING)
Cool.
PROFESSOR:
Eugene, you are disqualified.
A-- for not being enrolled,
and B-- the fact that your
last genetic experiment
ate my hand.
Now get it out of here.
Oh, you shouldn't have
done that.
Back in your cage,
little freaky one.
(WHIRS)
Help!
It's going to eat us alive!
Stand back. We'll stop it.
(GROWLS, WHIRRING)
Later. We'll stop it later.
But first
I'm in trouble, aren't I?
(CELL DOOR SLAMS)
Repto-slicer is slicing
and dicing up
downtown Porkbelly.
I'm okay.
(WHIRS)
(BRAKES SCREECH)
Stand down, Repto-slicer.
We don't want to hurt--
(WHIRRING)
-Well, that's not nice.
-(WHIRRING)
-(BUZZING)
-And that's just rude.
Don't panic.
Now that we've thoroughly
evaluated the enemy
We now will take
the proper steps
to capture the beast
and return non-slicing peace
to Porkbelly.
You've got to help us.
We can't stop this thing.
There is no way
I'm getting mixed up
with anything to do with Eugene.
Bling-Bling Boy.
He prefers to be called
Bling-Bling Boy.
He made that very clear
at the detention center.
Besides, only the person
who created such a monster
would know how to defeat it.
I'll stop him.
Oh, please.
How are you going to stop him?
Easy. Because it's time
for the return of
Johnny X!
Oh, and X Pooch.
Please don't drag me into this.
Johnny, you no longer
have mutant powers, remember?
We did neutralize
his mutant powers, right?
We did. I know we did.
Oh, right.
We forgot about the Power Poots.
We'll stop that shredding
menace to society.
No way. I'm not going downtown
only to get shredded
by a cute
yet razor-sharp lizard.
I have a lot to live for,
Johnny, and--
Stop your blabbing
and just tell me how many
steaks it'll cost.
-Four, and I want a chew toy.
-MARY: Wait.
You now have
your old hurricane hands
and shapeshifting powers, too.
Oh, and here. It's our
Electrochromatic Blanket.
It will allow you to sneak up
on Repto-slicer.
Cool! Bye.
Why did you give him
all that stuff?
If something happens
to Johnny,
we would have
no little brother
Oh, that's sweet.
to test all our dangerous
experiments on.
Good point.
JOHNNY:
Your flying still stinks.
Now get me down
to Repto-slicer.
(SCREAMING)
That's enough, Repto-slicer.
You've done enough damage
to our fine city,
And it's time I stop you
with my Hurricane Hands!
(CAR ALARM BLARING)
I'm not sure Hurricane Hands
are your best feature.
Try the Power Poots
and melt that bad boy.
(FARTS)
(BUZZES)
(WHIRS)
Um
help!
Hey, Sharp Stuff,
you think you're so smart,
but you can't catch me.
(CHUCKLES)
(REPTO-SLICER BUZZING)
Hey, look, I'm part poodle.
And we're giving up.
-(MAN CHATTERING)
-Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
I have good news and bad news.
The good news is Bling-Bling Boy
has agreed to disclose
Repto-slicer's weakness
and how we can defeat him.
What's the bad news?
He'll only tell us
if he gets a smooch from Susan.
No way.
And nothing will change my mind.
(WHIRS)
-(REPTO-SLICER WHIRRING)
-(CLANGING)
Okay, I'll help. Run!
BLING-BLING BOY:
Yes, it's my third time
in the facility this year,
but on the up side,
I'm making friends.
Yo, Tiny. My man.
See?
Do we have a deal or not?
Yes.
And now, Susan,
do you have my smooch?
Let's just get it over with.
(GIGGLES)
I finally got a kiss
from Susan Test.
Now, how do we stop
Repto-slicer?
Oh, I have no idea. Surprise!
You see? I just said that
to get a kiss from Susan,
and it worked.
It worked!
And surprise back.
You kissed a Susan Bot.
Hmm. Clever.
I thought your smooch
was a little metallic.
But that's not all.
(WHIRRING)
Hey, I have the same bikini
at home.
BLING-BLING BOY:
I'm sorry I created
Repto-slicer.
I just thought I wanted a pet
like the younger,
flaming-headed Test.
You could've
just gone to the pound
and gotten a dog, you know.
Yes, but I really wanted
something e-vile
with sharp rotating blades,
and I did everything
that a good pet owner
should've done.
I put it in a cage,
kept it in a nice dark closet,
barely fed it,
never changed the paper.
What? Did you ever
take Repto-slicer out
for a walk or to the park
or give it a cup of coffee?
Pfft! Oh, of course not.
It's inconceivable
for one million rotating spikes.
Hello! (CHUCKLES)
There's no way I can stop it.
But Johnny X can. Come on!
(WHIRRING)
(SCREAMING)
Hey, it's the kid
with the silly costume,
but awesome powers that are
almost as destructive
as Repto-slicer.
How will he try to stop
Repto-slicer this time?
Does he have a new power,
or will he try
that flaming thing
with his backside?
JOHNNY:
No! I will use this!
MAN:
A ball? You got to be kidding.
Come here, boy.
Get the ball. Get it.
-(WHIRS)
-JOHNNY: Good boy.
-Now fetch the stick.
-Hey, that's my stick,
and I refuse to share it.
(REPTO-SLICER WHIRS)
Throw it to him. Now!
(WHIRS)
Look! Repto-slicer slices
for good sometimes,
not just for evil.
(CROWD CHEERS)
Repto-slicer!
My new well-trained pet.
I've come to take you home.
Come here, boy.
(SNARLS)
I'm outta here!
Take me back. Take me back!
He's crazy!
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Good Repto-slicer. Good boy.
Aw. Repto-slicer
is actually kind of sweet.
Yeah, but how are we
going to keep
a slicing, shredding pet
happy and active, huh?
Oh, there's nothing
I love more
than the family sitting down
for a nice dinner.
And nothing goes better
with dinner than nachos.
Oh, but, honey,
there's no salsa.
Don't worry, Mom.
I'm on it.
Repto-slicer, do your thing.
(WHIRRING)
It's crazy,
but that thing
does make great salsa.
Now if he could only
heat up our steak.
Oh, I can take care
of that, Dad.
He's gonna blow!
ALL:
Johnny!
(MOTOR WHIRRING)
-Hey, Johnny.
-Come on.
Give it a little juice,
muchacho.
We're gonna miss the movie.
(COUGHS)
JOHNNY:
Just gotta get up this hill.
(MOTOR ENGINE BACKFIRES)
BOTH:
Oh! So close.
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(BOWLING PINS CLATTER
ON TV)
I need a more powerful scooter,
or I will die!
Look. Oh (GROANS)
I'm dying of
Lame-o-Scooteritis.
Oh! Ooh
Johnny, your father and I
wanted you to have
the safest scooter
a clearance sale could buy.
And that's why
we got you the Super Lame-o
Slow-Mo Scooter.
But really,
great performance, son.
Your acting
is getting quite good.
Johnny, you wanna test drive
the new, uh, sonic superscooter
we're developing?
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Wait. What's the catch?
-There's no catch.
-Liar!
MARY:
It's just a normal scooter.
Fused with a hypersonic
scramjet engine.
Ooh! I'm gonna call you
"Scoots."
I love you, Scoots.
But it's a speed demon, Johnny.
Are you sure you can handle it?
Are you kidding?
Could I handle
the Turbo-Action Backpack?
TWINS:
Not really.
-What about
the Turbo-Time Rewinder?
-Mm-mmm.
-Just give me Scoots.
-SUSAN: Wait.
Johnny, whatever you do,
do not touch the Mach 9 setting.
It's not ready
for testing, okay?
Yep. Laters.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
How long before Johnny
tests out Mach 9?
Two, three minutes tops.
JOHNNY:
Ladies and gentlemen,
watch as Johnny Test
jumps over
13 massive dump trucks
on his supersonic scooter.
-Captain, do we have clearance?
-No.
And remember,
your sister said not
to test the Mach 9 setting.
Right.
(BEEPING)
-Why do I even bother?
-(POLICE SIREN BLARING)
Hey, you kids.
No dangerous jumping
on school property.
Here we go!
-(GLASS BREAKS)
-(SCREAMS)
Honey, cable's on the fritz.
(TIRE SCREECHES)
Whoa! Freaky. Yet cool.
It's like a deserty
post-apocalyptic Porkbelly.
ROBOT: Read all about it.
Read all about it.
Would you like to purchase
today's edition?
Ten years later,
remembering the global
electromagnetic ripple
and the Porkbelly-wide
havoc and grief--
Johnny Test and his ugly dog
still at large.
What?
You are not that ugly.
Johnny, don't you get it?
We've traveled into the future,
destroyed it,
and now we're wanted fugitives.
-Say what?
-(ENGINE REVVING)
It's them!
The ones who caused Porkbelly
to look like this!
You're smart.
What's going on?
Uh, from what I can gather,
we crossed the time-space
continuum
and sent Porkbelly
into an alternative future
that includes dusty landscapes
and causes people to dress
really, really badly.
-Don't move!
-(ENGINE REVVING)
And now I suggest
we hop on Scoots!
-Hang on.
-(TIRE SCREECHES)
Not again.
Honey,
the wall is on the fritz again.
(BUZZES)
Great. We've traveled
further into the future.
But, hey, at least
they fixed the whole
ugly deserty thing.
-You're right!
-(VEHICLES HONKING)
Hey, maybe we're not
ultra-wanted fugitives anymore.
ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Still wanted. Still wanted.
Still wanted.
BOTH:
That would be a no.
Johnny Test,
step off the scooter
and put your hands in the air.
All I wanted was a fast scooter.
It was my sisters' fault.
They made me--
Step away from the scooter.
If I could go backwards in time,
I would, and--
Johnny, that's it.
Throw this baby in reverse.
Right. If we go backwards,
we'll go back in time.
Let's go backwards!
Stop! Stop!
Hey, look! We're back!
-In the future.
-(BEEPING)
Oh, goody.
The cops got an upgrade.
Johnny Test and ugly dog,
stand down.
He's not that ugly, okay?
Scoots! He's gone!
Um run!
(CLAMORING)
Wait till I get a hold
of your sisters.
(BEEPING)
VOICE: Welcome
to the Futuristic Person Finder.
Find anyone. Find anyone.
-Find anyone.
-My sisters-- they can
help us get home.
And then, I'll seek revenge.
Susan and Mary Test.
Mad scientists
currently residing
at Porkbelly Maximum Security
Nursing Home.
Ooh, fun!
How are we
gonna get into a maximum
security nursing home?
(BEEPS)
Yes. I'm here to see
my good friend
Susan and Mary Test.
Oh, they don't have
any friends.
All they mumble about
is someone called "Gil."
"Gil, Gil, Gil."
Yes. Ahem. That's me.
I'm Gil. I'm handsome.
Three doors down on the left.
Be on the lookout for these
two fugitives from the past.
Johnny Test and his ugly dog.
DUKEY:
I'm not that ugly!
It's him! It's Johnny Test
and the ugly dog!
-(BEEPS)
-TWINS: GIL?
You! You did this!
You made us the most wanted kid
and ugly dog in the future!
Nice to see you, too, Johnny.
And you could've said no
to using the scooter.
We didn't make you!
This is all your fault.
All he wanted
was a faster scooter,
which you provided,
and then it destroyed Porkbelly.
It was a cruel trick.
We were young.
Johnny Test,
we know you are in there.
Come out with your hands up.
All I did was ride a scooter!
But you punctured
the time-space continuum.
And long story short,
it caused global blackouts.
They just want to stop you
and lock you away for good
before you cause
another ripple.
TWINS:
Uh-oh.
How do we get home
to the past,
when you were young
and not so gross and wrinkly?
We have to get back to the lab.
Your old lab?
But the Time Scooter
was destroyed, and we're
surrounded by robo-police.
And you have a plan?
MARY: We'll modify your
old Lame-o Slow-Mo Scooter
and send you back to the past.
But they're gaining on us!
-Not for long.
-Whoa!
JOHNNY:
Where did you get the
Hypersonic Turbo-Wheelchairs?
SUSAN: We built them
in arts and crafts.
It's our old house.
JOHNNY:
And our old wrinkly dad.
Hey, it's the old lab.
Wow. We sure had
some wild experiments in here.
Good times. Good times.
POLICE:
Give up. We have you
surrounded.
Johnny, this is no time
for a walk down memory lane.
Honey, the holographic image
is on the fritz again!
I just have to attach the engine
to the scooter backwards
to reverse the time effect.
(SNORES)
She gets tired real easy
these days.
Go, Johnny! G--
go!
(BOTH GRUNTING)
Johnny, your father and I
wanted you to have
the safest scooter
a clearance sale could buy.
And that's why we got you
the Super Lame-o
Slow-Mo Scooter.
But really,
great performance, son.
Your acting
is getting quite good.
Johnny, you wanna test drive
the new, uh, sonic superscooter
we're developing?
Uh no.
TWINS:
No?
But it's really cool, and
it's got this super-fast
Mach 9 speed
that will make all
the neighborhood kids jealous.
The boy said no.
Do you at least want some time
to think about it?
Oh, we had some time
to think about it.
A lot of time.
And I'll stick
with my Lame-o Slow-Mo Scooter,
and not yours.
(ENGINE CHUGS)
Sometimes, I can't figure out
that boy and the ugly dog.
DUKEY:
I'm not that ugly!
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)