Adventure Time: Side Quests (2026) s01e12 Episode Script

[crow caws]
[quacks]
[bats squeal]
[opening theme song playing]
Adventure Time
Come on, grab your friends ♪
We'll go to very
Distant lands ♪
With Jake the Dog
And Finn the Human ♪
The fun will never end ♪
Adventure Time ♪
[whispering] Side Quests.
[marauders chanting]
Crack the egg!
- [both groaning and grunting]
- Crack the egg!
Crack the egg!
Hey! In the distance!
An adventurer
approaches the gate.
[compelling music playing]
How do I look, Jake?
You look sick, dude.
Closer still, I see
Okay, there he goes.
He's through the gate. Okay.
Pinch me off, Jake.
- [groans]
- [grunts]
- [swords rings]
- I'm Finn, the human.
- Slayer of zombies.
- Ooh.
[Finn] Deemed righteous
- by the Enchiridion
- [gasps]
- [Finn] Pacifier of mountains.
- Hmm.
Witch crusher!
Drop ball grabber!
- Princess saver.
- [buzzing]
Hey, what's going on
over here?
- Who's that kid?
- Scram, Bee!
Don't tell me
what to do, man.
And that's just
a partial account
of my heroic appetite.
I'm 12, so my bones
haven't even gotten dense yet.
I deserve a spot
at the big dog table!
[grunts]
No more kid size plates
of butter on plain pasta.
[smacks lips] Mmm.
Butter noodles.
Only raw beef
with jalapenos!
What's going on here?
Huh? [screaming]
Finn?
[Bee and Finn screaming]
Finn! Where'd you go?
[mumbles]
- [gasps]
- [screaming]
[indistinct shouting]
You can't swim, guy!
[panting]
- [gagging]
- [splashes]
[coughing]
- [solemn music playing]
- Ugh. I'm ruined, Jake.
What's that?
What do you mean?
I just flushed my rep
down the deepest latrine
known to all warrior-kind.
There's no coming
back from that.
Bro, that's really dramatic.
I have to leave Ooo now.
Word will spread
of my self-humiliation.
Leave Ooo?
Come on, man.
Nobody cares
you got surprised by a bee.
Let's go home
and make brownies.
I have no home.
- [whooshing]
- A hero shamed is doomed
to float into the wastes.
Look at me, man.
I'm telling you, it's fine.
I can't open my eyes.
I'm afraid of the water.
This makes my shame
even worse.
Whoa. Who ordered soup?
- [both exclaiming]
- We caught a strong current.
I can't stop us!
Good. Take me away.
Take me far, far away.
[panting]
Yo, how long
have we been sailing?
Boy, I wish
you hadn't mentioned
butter noodles earlier.
I'm so stinking
hungry now. Ugh.
[smacks lips]
And why am I thirsty?
I've been chugging
the seawater nonstop.
Aw, shoot! Look.
- Land ho!
- [Finn] Really?
Whoo! We did it!
- We got away from Ooo.
- Did we?
I don't know
where we are.
Well, as long as
whoever lives here
doesn't talk
to the outside world,
- I'll be fine.
- Hmm.
Hey, guy! Who are you?
My name is Shameus.
Okay, Shameus,
do you talk to anyone
not on this island?
No.
Yes! This is our home now.
Okay. But just for a day
or two till you get over
- this shame stuff.
- No.
Have you shame, stranger?
- Yes!
- It's temporary!
No, it's not!
We shall see.
Advance hither
and prove the legitimacy
of your claim to shame.
- [intriguing music playing]
- [clapping]
Gather everyone. Yes,
come to the circle.
Come and hear
how the winds of shame
brought these weary sacks
to our doorstep.
[dust whooshes]
[fire crackling]
[Finn] So there I was,
holding court
with the greatest ruffians
in the land of Ooo,
when out of nowhere
I was surprised by a bee.
I panicked, squealed.
And I think I might
have blacked out,
because the next thing I knew,
I'd ran over the wall
and found myself plummeting
into the sea like a dumb baby.
[listeners gasp]
Thus, making a complete
mockery of my whole life.
I gotta say, man,
it's not that bad.
It's more of a cool story
than anything else.
Oh. I was talking one time,
and after ten minutes,
my friend said
he couldn't hear me.
What you did
was way worse.
- For real?
- [Pan] Oh, yeah.
One time I asked Rainy here
if she was cooking
baby carrots for dinner--
But it turned out
I had just farted.
- [sighs] Oh!
- But your story was way worse.
You're an obvious
fit here, Finn.
Would you like
to move in?
And bunk
with Softabitha
- [whimpering]
- who wee-wees profusely
from her armpits
when she gets nervous?
Wee! Wee-wee!
- Wee-wee!
- Did you say, "Wee-wee"?
- Yes!
- That's great.
Those who have taken up
residence on these shores
have one thing in common.
All have arrived by boat.
So as a symbol
of commitment, you must
[dramatically]
burn the boat.
Hey, hey, hey, come on!
I'm the boat.
You can't burn me.
- We're not burning the boat.
- But the tradition--
Shameus, I will full force
punch your kneecaps
if you try to burn Jake.
All right,
we'll skip it this time.
Welcome, Finn and Jake,
to the Island of Shame.
[islanders] Shame on you!
Okay, Softabitha,
show them to their
shared bunk situation.
Tomorrow, we wake
for our morning duties.
[Softabitha snoring]
[mumbling in sleep]
Oh, hey
Oh, hey.
Oh, what? Your hot cousin,
Softony? Oh.
Sure, I'll meet him.
[giggles]
Um, my name is is
Wee-wee!
- Oh, no!
- [Jake groans]
[Softabitha sobbing
and snoring]
Let it drip, Jake.
It's what I deserve.
Finn, I'm gonna be honest.
All this wallowing
in embarrassment and shame
is kind of freaking me out.
It feels bad.
[chuckles]
Now you're getting it.
- [groans]
- [snaps fingers] Wee-wee.
Well, whatever
sinks your boat, man.
[Softabitha sobbing
and snoring]
- [splattering]
- Mmm.
This feels right.
[cheerful music playing]
Finn, I'm sure
you have many questions,
and you're probably wondering
what your life is going
to look like from now on.
- Huh, yeah, I guess so.
- [groans] Ugh.
Oh. Hello, everyone.
Shame on you, David.
Shame on me.
Shame on you all.
[all] Shame on us.
Oh, Gary. Especially large
shame on you.
Shame on me.
But don't worry, Finn.
You'll have a purpose soon.
Oh, good.
'Cause I shoved my life purpose
in the garbage
the moment I screamed
at that bee.
Hey, what the heck
is this place?
This is the sculpture garden
of shame.
- [all hammering]
- [stone clattering]
Our unforgivable acts
become our identities.
I gave a speech
with a boogy danglin'.
[Shameus] And so that
we may never forget
the disgusting people we are
My pants fall downd.
we carve our deepest shames
into stone
I'm a terrible sculptor.
where they will
live forever!
Hey, looks like
that guy's shame
didn't lived forever.
Shame in peace, Steven.
Yikes. That's dark, man.
Whoa! Whose sculpture is that?
Finn, we saved that one
just for you.
The sooner you start carving,
the sooner you can begin
the eternal suffering
you deserve.
Oh, I deserve it.
Uh, Finn, you sure
you don't wanna
maybe go and do something
totally and completely
not this?
Jake, this is who I am now.
A little screechy, baby-bee,
scaredy-butt, squeal-boy
with a hammer and a chisel.
[Shameus] Oh. Don't forget
your shame hood.
[Finn] And I wear
a shame hood now.
This is who I am.
[Shameus] Shameful.
Truly shameful.
[sighs] Well, I said,
"I've got your back
till death do us part,"
so that's what
I'm gonna do.
- [Finn hammering]
- [stone clattering]
Hey, nice job on the eyes.
Very soulful.
[Finn] Ah, shoot.
Should I redo 'em?
You know, there's a lot of room
on this big old stone.
You might as well carve your
whole cornucopia of shames.
You must remember
a ton of 'em, right?
Like the time I walked
into a lamp post
and said sorry to it?
I don't remember that one.
You gotta remember
the one time
I called Princess Bubblegum
"Mom", right?
Nobody remembers
that stuff, dude.
It's not a big deal.
Remember that time
I accidentally
shot someone
with that harpoon?
That was me.
You shot me with that harpoon.
Yeah, and I already forgot.
Oh.
The only person who remembers
your embarrassing moments
is you.
- Hmm.
- [Softabitha sobbing nearby]
[yells] Softony!
Whoa, Jake.
You're totally right!
- Yeah, baby!
- [exhilarating music playing]
- [hammering]
- [stone cracking]
[islanders] Huh?
[groans angrily]
Everyone! Listen!
Your shame isn't good or bad.
Shame is doodoo,
and it's time
to start flushing!
[Softabitha] Uh, what?
If my faults
don't define me
Holy Crud!
I could've been making out
with Softony
instead of carving
this stupid rock?!
My name is Softabitha,
- and I am not my shame!
- [stone clattering]
[both] Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo!
- [laughing]
- Get over here, girl.
See, everyone?
- It's that easy to be free.
- [Gary gasps]
- [Finn] Join us.
- [Pan gasps]
[Finn] Jake will be our boat
- [all gasping]
- and we'll sail back
to our lives on the mainland!
[laughs] Yeah,
that's the spirit.
[crackling]
Oh. Oh, I really misread
the situation here.
I'm afraid there can be
no escape, Finn.
- [brooding music playing]
- We stayed our hand before,
but I think it's time
that we
[shouting] burn the boat!
[islanders yelling]
Oop! [laughs]
Time to get out of here.
[islanders yelling]
- [islander 1] Huh?
- [islander 2] Uh-oh.
- [islanders screaming]
- [islander 3] We deserve this!
- [playful music playing]
- [thudding]
[Jake] Whoo-hoo!
We're home free, baby!
[Jake, Finn,
Softabitha grunting]
- [Finn] Ah!
- Whoopsie doozle. [sighs]
[Shameus, in distance]
Shame, shame, shame.
Nowhere to run, Finn.
[islanders groaning angrily]
Even if everyone
forgets your mistakes,
the wind and the rocks
will remember.
For your shame
[dramatically] is eternal.
Your butt is eternal.
Pardon?
Wow, Finn.
Super proud of you
standing up
to that sad, bad dude.
My mistakes don't define me.
I do!
[laughs] Yeah,
that's what I'm saying.
You got a lot of smart-brain
in that developing boy-skull.
[chuckles] Yeah,
I'm pretty smart.
All right, Jake. Fly!
I can't fly, dude.
- Aw, nuts.
- [both gasp]
Wha [screaming]
[water whooshing]
- [all laughing and cheering]
- [triumphant music playing]
[islanders] Huh?
[islanders screaming]
[all screaming]
- [screams]
- [water splashing]
[laughing and cheering
continues]
[triumphant music ends]
[closing theme song playing]
Come along with me ♪
And the butterflies
And bees ♪
We can wander
Through the forest ♪
And do so as we please ♪