Grosse Pointe Garden Society (2025) s01e12 Episode Script

1
Previously on "Grosse
Pointe Garden Society"
Alice.
- She's just a friend.
- Nobody looks at their friend like that.
Just tell me how you feel.
What's our goal here?
Dig up dirt on Brett.
- What'd he do?
- Your wife.
Someone stole the quilt,
but I will get that thing back.
How did we get here, Birdie?
We were so freaked out.
Everything just got
out of control so fast.
We got to get gas.
With a dead person in the trunk?
I've never heard of
anyone getting killed
the way that you just described.
Show me.
Maybe I will take that light.
[SOFT MUSIC]
Every garden needs to be
left fallow for a season.
Silent night ♪
Holy night ♪
You let the soil rest
so it can come back
stronger in the spring.
All is calm ♪
It's the only way for the garden
to transition from death to new life.
All is bright ♪
Keith!
Oh, my God.
Check his pulse.
Uh, help me put pressure on the wounds.
Ugh!
Oh, there's so much blood.
Keith!
Keith, wake up!
I can't find a pulse.
Keith! Come on, move.
- There's no pulse.
- Oh, my God!
Just keep keep putting pressure!
I am, I am!
Keith, come on. Move
something, just anything!
- Guys.
- Oh, my God!
Oh, God. Oh, please, please
- Guys.
- Please, please, please.
Oh, please. Oh, God, please. Oh, no.
- Why don't you do CPR?
- It's too late.
Or what about those, um
the the paddle thingies?
That doesn't put the
blood back in people.
- No, no, no.
- He's gone.
- No!
- Oh, God.
Call 911.
- OK.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Let's think about this.
Think about what?
What we're gonna say.
What?
"Send an ambulance."
- I mean about what happened.
- It was an accident!
Yeah, well, it doesn't look like one.
But it was.
Our prints are all over his body.
Because we are trying to save him.
Or we pushed him.
[TENSE MUSIC]
What? That didn't happen!
Tell that to a jury.
We're on trial now?
We will be if we don't
think this through.
But it's the right thing to do.
OK, then what?
With the quilt and the wood chipper?
I mean, at best, it's manslaughter.
Like, we literally slaughtered a man.
On accident!
That still puts us behind bars!
Yeah, you want to never
see your kids again?
Oh.
- Alice.
- Fine.
Yeah, I'll call.
No.
Alice, wait.
Alice. Alice.
Wait, wait.
What did you tell Patty?
Huh?
To get her down here.
What did you text her?
First, I said,
"Get your ass down to
Mack Avenue Garden Center."
OK, that's not so bad.
I mean, it's a little aggro, but
And then I might have said,
"I'm gonna take away
what you love the most."
- [SIGHS]
- [GASPS]
Oh, no.
Jesus!
I meant the quilt.
But it sounds like her husband.
[GASPS]
There goes manslaughter.
Now what do we do?
[WHIMPERS] She hasn't read it yet.
She will when the cops wake her up
to say her husband's dead.
We can't call anyone else.
We can't. We can't.
But he's my father-in-law!
[SOBBING] I have to.
Either way, we're going to his funeral.
Oh! [SOBS]
You want to go to jail too?
Ugh.
I don't think I want to garden anymore.
Why me?
If we get pulled over,
you're the drunk friend
who needs a ride home.
Are you sure we
shouldn't just try the lake?
No, better to hide in plain sight.
Please.
Garden makes the most sense.
Yeah, we decide what gets planted.
And how deep.
[PHONE RINGING]
Oh, it's Addie.
Don't answer it.
What if it's an emergency?
Sweetie, it's too late for iPad.
Daddy didn't close my closet.
Addison.
The monster's gonna get me.
Monsters don't hide in the closet.
Where are they?
[BOTTLES CLINKING]
Nowhere I'll ever let you be.
When are you coming home?
Soon, baby.
Come home now.
Only if you go to sleep.
OK, Mommy. Love you.
I love you so much.
OK.
No more FaceTimes.
Purses, phones put them in here.
[LID CLATTERS]
[ALL SIGH]
Showtime, drunk friend.
I know this might sound weird,
but
try to take care of him.
We will.
[LINE RINGS]
Hey, it's Lexi. Leave a message.
[BEEP]
Hey, baby.
It's me.
I know you said you needed some space,
but I meant to congratulate
you on all your new followers.
People are really eating up
all your bartending content.
Also, couldn't help but notice you got
a lot of men following you.
But hey, you're a fierce woman.
If any of those creeps
slide into your DMs,
I know you'll be smart about it.
Anyway, it's looking like a slow night.
So if you get bored
or anything, hit me up.
Whatever.
Bye.
[TABLET CHIMES]
[ENGINE TURNING OVER]
Hey, man.
Help us out?
What do you need?
Beer.
Yeah, my buddy and I
forgot our IDs at home.
[SIGHS]
I don't know, I could get arrested.
Come on.
We'll give you some.
I don't drink.
OK.
What about weed?
Do I look like I do drugs?
Uh
Well, you don't look like
you'd turn them down.
That's funny.
Just get the hell
out of here, all right?
Y'all are spoiled pricks.
Go.
- [SIGHS]
- [SCOFFS]
- Let's go, dude.
- All right, dude.
Good God!
Dude, am I crazy,
or did that guy smell hella good?
[LAUGHS]
I thought the same thing, yo!
Like like cologne but super fancy.
Hey, let's try this asswipe.
Hey, lady!
[KNOCKS]
Bro, that's your fake mom.
[THUD]
[SIGHS]
[WHISPERING]
Stick it back under the brick.
This is bananas.
No matter what happens,
she can never read that text.
OK, so Keith came
downstairs to make a quesadilla.
It has to be here somewhere.
- Right there.
- Oh.
Um, try Doug's birthday.
[PHONE BEEPS]
- Oh, God damn it.
- Think.
Maybe maybe her street address.
That's not enough numbers.
Honey, what are you doing?
You better not be eating again.
[GASPS]
[GASPS]
Alice, wh
What are you doing?
I let myself in.
I didn't mean to scare you.
What time is it?
Late.
Is Doug here?
Uh, no, no.
We sent him to the cabin.
Uh, I was
I was worried.
Ah, well, don't be.
His dad is, uh is
joining him tomorrow.
Is Keith's car in the driveway?
I didn't see it.
That man is always
at some fast-food drive-through,
stuffing his face,
thinking I won't wake up.
[CHUCKLES]
Well, since no one's
sleeping, how about some tea?
I I feel terrible, uh
About what happened tonight.
Well, it was embarrassing for everyone.
Is Doug OK?
You really care?
[WATER RUNNING]
He's still my husband.
[STOVE CLICKS, BURNER WHOOSHES]
Then let's talk honestly for once.
OK.
You can't fake a marriage, Alice.
Doug means everything to me.
That doesn't mean
there isn't some tiny bit
of room for someone else.
I've never cheated, Patty.
But if you stay in this
game long enough,
then there's bound to be another man
who gets you better than your husband.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
[DOOR BELL CHIMES]
How'd it go?
Let's just get out of here.
What if we had to make
a slight detour first?
What?
OK, so remember when
you were in high school
and your parents were like,
"If you ever get drunk at a party,
"we'd rather you call us and drive home,
and we promise you won't get punished."
And then you fall for it
and you get grounded
for, like, a month.
And then that's, like,
the last time you ever
call them for anything ever again.
What?
[SIGHS]
[GASPS]
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
Are you kidding?
They're out here
wasted, trying to buy beer.
Why is that our problem?
Because he could get arrested.
I'm sorry, but how is that
more important than us going to prison?
Because I want him to
know that he can count on me.
Or you could just get
a new garden intern.
[SOFT MUSIC]
He might be more
than just a garden intern.
That's not what's going on.
Come on.
Wife to wife.
No.
So you mean to tell me
that you have no feelings
whatsoever for your friend?
- Not even a pang?
- [TEAKETTLE WHISTLING]
Patty!
Oh, come on.
I mean, let's just lay
the cards on the table.
OK, you're right.
Which part?
Maybe there is something else with Brett
that, um, I've just ignored.
- Mm-hmm.
- [WHISTLING STOPS]
All this real talk is making me hungry.
[CHUCKLES]
You want a burger?
Keith says that calories
don't really count
between midnight and 8:00 a.m., so
[TENSE MUSIC]
Oh, you know what? I
I can't read a damn
thing without my glasses.
Uh, OK.
Don't get old, Alice!
Uh, so what do you want?
I'm good.
Oh, you mean to tell me
you don't do fries with that metabolism?
I'm just exhausted.
Well, marriage will
do that to you, Alice.
Look, it's long and
hard and complicated.
But if you're faking
it, you're not in it.
I'm in it, Patty.
It took me a long time
to appreciate what I have in Keith.
Uh, you'll never know
how sorry I am about
what happened tonight.
[SOFT MUSIC]
Don't waste all that
time if it isn't right.
OK.
But I might leave him if
he doesn't text me back
about those fries.
[INDISTINCT POLICE RADIO CHATTER]
[SIGHS] Thank you.
Never let 'em see you yawn, brother.
Yeah, well, overnights
are kicking my ass.
You got to embrace it.
You got to be one with the darkness.
We're not killing vampires.
We're babysitting drunks.
If that's how you want to see it.
Well, it's not gonna
get me to division chief.
You got half the town at
that charity event tonight.
So what?
Well, think about it.
You got a bunch of rich
people all being rich together.
What is the worst that can happen?
- [LAUGHS]
- Oh, come on, man.
Listen, every case that
comes through that door
could be the one to get
your feet on the ladder.
Lady witnessed some
kind of fight at the gala.
Two guys trashed the place.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
See?
There you go.
Our crew is counting on us.
Not my problem.
We can't show up empty-handed.
Dude, your mom's fire.
I think your friend's
had enough to drink.
You're en fuegotoo.
Lovely.
[SCOFFS]
All I'm saying is,
I think there's a real opportunity here.
This is your moment to decide
what kind of mom you want to be:
lame mom or cool mom.
How about just mom?
- [SIGHS]
- Lame.
- [PHONE RINGING]
- [GASPS]
- Oh, my God!
- There's a phone.
Yeah. It's how calls work.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
Who's Wifey?
Uh, just a friend.
Who you call Wifey?
What do we do?
Send it to voicemail.
[SIGHS]
Whose car is this?
Guys, I don't feel too good.
Open the window!
[BUTTON CLICKING]
It's locked.
Uh
Stop, stop, stop, stop!
[TIRES SCREECHING]
[RETCHING]
Did you guys steal this car?
[TIRES SCREECHING]
One six-pack.
- [HORN HONKING]
- [GASPS]
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
I'm solid.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
All right.
They should be here by now.
Oh, God.
What do we do?
Just hold our breath.
[LINE RINGING]
Hey, it's Lexi. Leave a message.
[BEEP]
[LAUGHTER]
Hey, Lexi.
Stop stalking me.
All you have to do
is pick up your phone.
Did you put another tracker on my car?
Yeah, that's what I do for a living.
[SCOFFS] Go back to work.
Hey, everything OK here?
None of your business, tough guy.
He's my boss.
[SIGHS]
I'll be inside if you need me.
Why are you working
so late on a school night?
Because I can't pay tuition, Dad.
What about that
birthday check I sent you?
[SCOFFS] That covered, like, one book.
How much do you need?
Don't worry about it.
That's why I'm here,
because I worry about you.
Awesome.
I'll get you a World's
Greatest Dad T-shirt.
Just give me another shot.
Bourbon or tequila?
I'm not that person anymore.
Oh? You moved on to scotch.
OK.
OK.
Fair enough.
Truce, please?
[SCOFFS]
Fine.
How much is tuition?
You can't afford it.
That's my problem, not yours.
[MUFFLED ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Just don't break my heart again.
I'm sorry about your car.
Oh. That's OK. I don't
[GAGS]
OK.
Thank you.
Or whosever it is.
How you getting home?
Uh, I've been crashing
here for a little while, actually.
Why?
My mom's pissed at me.
What'd you do this time?
I told her that I want
to hang with you more.
Oh.
[SOFT MUSIC]
I'd like that.
Thanks for being so cool.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
OK. [CLEARS THROAT]
- Love you.
- What?
Oh, no. Not in a weird way.
- That was like a
- Oh, no, yeah.
Hey, man. Love you.
- Yeah. Yeah, I got it.
- You get it. OK, I'm gonna go.
- OK.
- [ENGINE TURNING OVER]
[SIGHS]
Nice.
Dude, she got us nonalcoholic.
Bro!
I'm sorry about all that.
It's OK.
I didn't know what to do.
You did what any good mom would do.
[SIGHS]
You really think we're
gonna get away with all this?
We don't have a choice.
[BOTH SIGH]
I mean, even if they did get
pulled over for something,
it doesn't mean they got arrested.
But if they didn't get arrested,
why wouldn't they be here?
Oh, man.
Let's say we get through this.
OK.
Then what?
What do you mean?
How how are we
supposed to wake up tomorrow
and make breakfast with
this seared in our brains?
I don't know.
Here's an omelet, Doug.
Would you like a fork,
like the pickax that was in your dad?
Or maybe a spoon to shovel
some sugar over your cereal,
like the the dirt that I
dumped on your dad?
You guys eat big breakfasts.
Patty was right about me.
The same woman who shot your dog.
God.
You're a good friend.
[ENGINE RUMBLING]
Oh, thank God.
Wait, that's not them.
[TENSE MUSIC]
What do you mean?
It's a cop.
[SIREN CHIRPS]
Oh!
Oh!
This is not good.
[SIGHS]
[TENSE MUSIC]
Here.
- Go with it.
- What?
[ROMANTIC MUSIC]
Attention, lovebirds.
This is private property.
So you don't have to go home,
but you should go home.
[ENGINE TURNING OVER]
[SIGHS]
[GEARSHIFT CLICKS]
[ENGINE STOPS]
[BOTH SIGH]
Did you mean what you said to Patty?
Does it matter?
Kinda.
Our lives are already a mess.
Just answer the question.
And then what?
I don't know.
What, we pretend like
like I'm not married
and that we're not about
to bury my father-in-law?
[ENGINE RUMBLING]
- [SIGHS] It's about time.
- Uh
[SIGHS]
[TENSE MUSIC]
[CREAK, THUD]
What are we gonna do about their car?
All right.
We take it to one of those
chop shops downtown.
Parts get sold off across the country.
What about DNA?
We'll strip the fabric from the trunk.
That, uh that only
takes care of the blood.
What about the back seat?
Who was in the back seat?
[GAGS, COUGHS]
Dude.
Oh, God! It's everywhere.
[PHONE RINGING]
Wifey.
Oh, God, it's Patty again.
You got to text her something.
No.
OK, her next call is
gonna be to the cops.
What do I say?
Whatever buys us the most time.
It's not the worst thing
we've done tonight.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[SIGHS]
We'll do it together, OK?
Yeah.
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]
[EERIE VOCALIZING]
[SOMBER MUSIC]
- [FIRE WHOOSHES]
- [GASPS]
Once ♪
Wait, where's the phone?
And where's Birdie?
- We made a deal.
- I know.
No more secrets.
Of disgust ♪
Have you been up all night?
Still can't sleep.
You're gonna pass out
during your soccer game today.
Not if the monsters eat me first.
OK.
Where are they?
I fell hard ♪
Hard ♪
I fell fast ♪
[GASPS]
Sorry.
Just your jacket.
Did you check under the bed?
No.
Oh, they love it down there.
[GASPS]
Puppy.
I've been looking for him.
Yeah.
[SIGHS]
Can I ask you something?
Mm-hmm.
Why would a monster want to eat you?
I did something bad.
Everyone does bad things.
I spilled my juice box
on Daddy's laptop.
Oh.
Well, that sounds like an accident.
But I blamed Julie.
Well, what did Daddy say?
We need a new babysitter.
He was just upset.
Should I tell him it was me?
Well
It won't fix his laptop.
Just because you do a bad thing
doesn't make you a bad person.
[VOCALIZING]
Can I help you, ma'am?
I'm here to see Joel.
Are you a friend?
I was.
Follow me.
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
[KNOCK AT DOOR]
[POUNDING ON DOOR]
Come on. Open up.
Zoe has to go to the bathroom.
Hey!
Come here.
[GROWLS PLAYFULLY, LAUGHS]
Daddy, I got to pee.
- I can't breathe.
- I know.
I just missed you guys.
You just saw them yesterday.
OK, OK.
Wow!
How late were you out?
Oh, uh, you know, lost track.
Oh.
Who were you with?
Uh, friends.
Who?
I don't even remember.
I had a lot to drink.
Is that why you pulled
me on the dance floor?
Huh?
Because you were so drunk?
[SIGHS]
I'm just, like
really freaked out.
Yeah.
Me too.
Melissa
That doesn't mean that we can't
like, try again.
Um
maybe we shouldn't just jump into this.
What's that mean?
Uh, it's complicated.
OK?
Well, you seemed to have
it all figured out last night.
Well, I'm not in the
best place right now.
Are you serious?
It wouldn't be fair to you.
You know, I just
I kind of can't understand
what changed literally overnight.
Nothing I could ever explain.
OK.
Thanks for the update.
No, wait.
No, you know, you don't
have to do the whole, like,
"it's not you, it's me" thing.
I I get it.
No, I highly doubt that.
[SIGHS] Come on.
It was a stupid idea anyways.
Why?
We were never gonna fix
something this broken, right?
[SOMBER MUSIC]
[SIGHS]
[CRYING]
[PHONE BUZZING]
Marilyn?
Whoa, just slow slow down.
Slow down, OK?
What?
No, I haven't listened
to your voicemail yet.
I oh, my God.
OK, OK, OK.
- [KEYS JINGLING]
- I'm coming.
[DOOR CREAKS OPEN]
[DOOR SLAMS]
[TENSE MUSIC]
My friends and I sort
of murdered someone.
Show me.
All right.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Let's do this.
Now?
Would you rather wait
till the store is open?
We cleaned everything.
Trust me
there's always evidence.
I really don't want to go back there.
Oh, I'm sorry, but, uh
[CLEARS THROAT]
I'm really gonna need
you to walk me through it.
Can't I just tell you how to get inside?
Homicide's still gonna
need your statement.
Why do we need to involve them?
Because that's what happens
when you're charged with murder.
I was sort of hoping that
we could keep this just
between the two of us.
Let me get this straight.
You rip out my heart,
and now you expect me to help you?
Can't I just owe you a favor?
You then spiked it on the ground
while it was still barely beating
and then you stomped
all over it for sport.
OK, I could have
handled that differently.
Yeah, I've got notes.
I needed to make sure
that you wouldn't come back.
Mission accomplished.
Because I would have wanted you to.
And then we would
have had tons of hot sex
because there is no other kind with us.
And then I would have felt terrible
and broken up with you again,
and then more hot sex,
except now it's even
hotter because you're mad.
And the cycle just repeats
itself over and over again,
like a snake eating its tail.
And what is wrong with that?
- It's not fair!
- To who?
Everyone!
You know you could
have just broken up with me
over a text like a normal person.
There's nothing normal about this, Joel.
Mm.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
It's good you came in first.
The DA will take it easy,
and you'll do less
time than your friends.
I can't sell them out.
It's the only way to
avoid a long sentence.
I can't do that either.
You might surprise yourself.
They've got toilet wine.
I can't have our baby behind bars.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
[THUDDING]
[BIRD SQUAWKING]
I probably would have covered
up a murder for you anyway.
That's not the only reason I told you.
How the hell are we gonna do this?
[SIGHS]
I don't know.
But I know I only
want to do it with you.
And you're 100% sure that It's
Oh, God!
Nothing happened with my ex.
But you're such a good liar.
Well, then why don't you
give me that polygraph?
[LIGHT MUSIC]
They only had decaf freshly brewed.
My fave.
Um, thank you so much for
meeting me on short notice.
I didn't know if you'd be hungry.
Oh, maybe later.
So this is gonna
sound a little bit strange.
The guy that you've been
following for my husband.
My boy Brett.
What exactly have you found on him?
[SIGHS]
Not a damn thing.
Oh.
- Oh, sorry.
- Oh, no, do your chair.
No, I don't have to.
- [LAUGHS]
- [SIGHS]
Did you get any sleep?
No.
Think we'll ever be the same?
Maybe someday.
I meant us.
[DOOR CLICKS OPEN]
Oh, hey.
Has anyone heard from Birdie?
Just goes straight to voicemail.
[SIGHS]
And why is Marilyn calling a
goddamn meeting so early?
Shouldn't she be at home
with her goddamn cat?
How are we ever
gonna get the quilt back?
We're not.
How are we ever gonna
get that phone back?
We're not.
[GROANS]
There's just no way this ends well.
Everything leads back to us.
[PENSIVE MUSIC]
When a garden goes fallow,
it may seem like there's nothing to do.
It's time to wake up ♪
Stop calling it love ♪
Even though it just looks
like a bunch of empty soil,
it's actually the most crucial time.
I wanted to be your star ♪
But you couldn't see ♪
The slightest misstep,
like adding too much fertilizer,
can create problems
for generations to come.
Looks like she bought it.
So we dump it in some
frozen lake by their cabin?
No, he's not going ice fishing.
Where is he going?
Shopping.
For what?
His new life.
That's why you have to be willing
to roll up your sleeves
and get your hands dirty.
[OMINOUS MUSIC]
Whatever it takes to
protect the garden you love.
Good news, baby.
I found a way to get you that tuition.