The Suite Life of Zack & Cody s01e25 Episode Script
Commercial Breaks
[People chatting.]
Ladies and gentlemen, quiet, please.
Quiet, please.
Please, please, please.
Ladies and gentlemen, I need your attention.
All eyes on me.
I need quiet.
Now-- [Rattling.]
[Crashing and banging.]
Now, I've called you all here because-- [rattling.]
[Crash and rattling.]
[Contents rattling.]
[Contents rattling.]
I hope there will be no more disturbances.
Mom, Zack stole my allowance.
I did not steal.
I told you I was gonna take it.
Did not! Did too! Did not! Guys! Guys! [Contents rattling.]
Now, I have some disturbing news that concerns all of you.
If it's about the person who accidentally sat on a box of candy And then ate it, she's really, really sorry.
Um, if this isn't about me, could we make it about me? 'Cause otherwise, me is going.
No, what's it about is Mr.
tipton has chosen this hotel as the backdrop for his new commercial.
Woman: OOH! I know it's terribly inconvenient.
And to make matters worse, all employees will be asked to prepare an audition.
Now, I realize it's the last thing we all want to do, but we must make-- oh, my word! Oh! Oh! Oh! Ohhh! UhI think they took that rather well.
Here I am in your life here you are in mine yes, we have the suite life most of the time you and me, we got the world to see so come on down just me and you know what to do so come on down it's you and me, and me and you we got the whole place to ourselves you and me, we got it all for free so come on down this is the suite life we've got the suite life This is great! This is our chance to get on tv! Yeah.
I always thought you'd be on tv.
I just assumed you'd be in handcuffs.
You mean as a magician? Yeah.
That's it.
Oh, man! This line must stretch all the way to the ballroom.
With all these people, we're never gonna get picked.
WELL, YOU WON'T, BUT WHEN I BECOME A STAR, you can be one of my peeps.
Not the main peep.
Maybe a backup peep.
But-- not a peep out of you.
Zack, remember, rejection is a big part of show business.
You have to persevere, which includes standing in line with a million other people who share the same dream.
You're right, mom.
So hold our place in line and call us once you get to the front.
YEAH, NOW YOU'RE DREAMING! You're gonna wait right here.
Actually, you're gonna wait back there.
All: OH, MAN! [HUMMING Russian DANCE: TREPAK FROM NUTCRACKER SUITE.]
A cappella! [Humming.]
[Plates crash.]
Ta-da.
Congratulations.
I've seen a lot of lousy acts today, but yours is the first to make me actually fear for my life.
Well, that was nothin'.
You're right.
Wait until you see me Juggle! Ha ha! Dun, dunDun! All right.
Yippie kii-ay I'm a happy cowboy today Yaahh! It worked! BUT YOU NEVER WILL.
NOW, VAMOOSE.
Fine.
Then I'd like my rope back.
Yaaahhh! Take it away, dundee.
[Cluck cluck.]
[Snorting and puffing.]
[Cluck cluck cluck cluck.]
Isn't he amazing? That's youMaking that tippy-tappy sound.
Aren't I amazing? Next! I can't believe it! I know that director.
I once had a date with him! Remember to mention we're your kids.
He hates me.
And your name was? So the date didn't go well? Let's put it this way: I crawled out of the bathroom window before the salad arrived.
I can't go out there! I CAN.
HE DOESN'T HATE ME.
Wait until he sees your act.
Next! [Sighs.]
Who and what are you? I am the great kodinski.
And I'm goin' to perform my salute to spring.
It's an interpretive dance.
[Recording of birds chirping and brook babbling plays.]
[Birds chirping.]
[Water running; Thunder.]
[Thunder.]
[Dove coos; Splat.]
[Rain and wind.]
[Soft music with beat comes in.]
[Strong wind.]
[Birds twittering.]
[Music winds up to a finish.]
HERE'S MY SALUTE TO SPRING.
Next! You, sirAre no friend of the dance.
This is encouraging.
At least she's got some professional experience.
No plates or poultry.
Demina, cross my fingers for me.
I saw your face now I'm on the verge of romance and I've been lookin' for a while, let me tell you it's gone from my head to my feet now I'm startin' to dance I can feel it, can you feel it? You're the man-- Stop! I'd know those legs anywhere.
Last time I saw them, they were on their way to the ladies' room.
So you remember me.
Let's put it this way: Next! Hey! I kicked you out.
Don't think just 'cause you changed your clothes I won't recognize you.
No, you kicked my brother out.
And I don't blame you.
He's a speed bump on the road of entertainment.
Nice try! No, no! Really! We're twins.
Please.
Do you think I was born yesterday? NOT WITH THOSE WRINKLES.
Dun dun-dun-dun-dun dun dun Next! [Music starts.]
Next! I hate spotlights.
So do I.
Now, 1 and uh-2-- wait a minute.
I worked really hard on this.
And uh-3 and 4 You had your chance, sister.
Now make way for a real singer.
hold it! I am going to sing, you're going to like it, and you are going to get out of here! And now enjoy the song stylings of maddie Fitzpatrick.
In my dreams I can see you, shoo bop bop your eyes are like the stars and shine so bright when I wake in the mornin'-- shoo bop bop everything seems to feel so right shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop ow! [Sound system reverberates.]
Why don't you shoo bop bop outta my life?! Next! [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
Man: HEY, LOOK WHO'S HERE.
Hi! Hi.
I'm gonna sing and dance.
[Soto voce.]
At the same time.
And I'll try to watch and hold down my lunch at the same time.
I'm a girl kind of girl [Out of timing.]
I love bracelets and rings diamonds and rubies and all of those things [Screeching.]
because spring [Off-key.]
is my favorite thing we're not talkin' zirconium [Screeching.]
spring is my favorite thing Sto-opp! Stop! Bring back the chicken.
Why on earth should I put you in my commercial? Because my daddy owns this hotel and signs your check.
Brilliant! YouAre hired! Ok, people! I need all the dancers playing guests to line up, please! Very tall guest Further right.
That's us! Move! [Faking mature voice.]
Sorry.
I'm so tall, it takes a while for it to get from my brain down to my feet.
It's not fair! HOW COME YOUR FACE GETS TO BE IN THE COMMERCIAL? Your face is my face.
Besides, your feet are in the commercial, and you don't hear me complainin'.
[Gasping for air.]
Speakin' of feet Don't you ever change your socks?! Ok, people.
It is Step, step, kick, and turn.
ALL RIGHT? VERY SIMPLE.
YOUR TURN.
Step, step, kick.
And turn.
OhWhoa Whoa! Ohhh! [Mature voice.]
I told you-- [own voice.]
I told you we were twins.
Hmm.
Double the stink! IT WAS HIS SOCKS! Boys, isn't it bad enough that I have to put up with these commercial people disrupting my hotel? Now, behave, or I'll have your mother take you to your room.
Guys, you're embarrassing me! YOU'RE EMBARRASSING YOU.
You're dancing luggage.
Ok, people, let's take it from the top.
And make it good.
Mr.
tipton is watching.
He is? From where? From his private jet.
He's getting the feed from that camera right over there.
All: HELLO, Mr.
TIPTON! Ohhh All right, people, places! Playback! Action! [Song intro plays.]
Welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? come and stay at the tipton the tipton keeps you on top whoa! Whoa! Is it just me, or are your ears bleeding? What? OhWe're gonna dub the voice.
Because you're the--whooh! Aah! Who's going to dub her feet? London? Sweetie? You are doing great! Thanks! If this were a bowling alley.
But remember? I told you to go to your left? I did go to my left.
Then go to your other left.
[Both talking with mouths full.]
This food is only for the crew.
Have you guys been eating it? No No Ok, people! Try to impress me! Like that's possible.
Playback! Action! welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? when you stay at the-- the-- the-- IT'S YOUR NAME! Oh! When you stay at theLondon Your last name! Well, I'm sorry! It's just all so confusing! The words, the music, the dancing! No! It's easy! Well, if it's so easy, then you try it.
OkI will.
Playback.
welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on top when you stay at the tipton the good times, they never stop because you're the star when you travel far the food is always gourmet Chorus: GOURMET at the tipton at the tipton at the tipton it's your place to stay the tipton is the place to stay Check in! [Applause.]
Brilliant! That was brilliant! Please tell me there was film in the camera.
I could But I'd be lying.
We used up all the film on the airhead heiress.
[Gasps.]
You're fired! London, YOU'RE FIRED.
Wait.
Do you not remember who I am? No! And apparently, neither do you! My father will not stand for this.
Right, daddy? [Telephone rings.]
That's him.
Hi, daddy.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh! I'm fired.
You're hired.
Yeah, I was gonna quit anyway.
No one makes a fool of London Tipton! Tipton! Tipton! I knew that.
I was pausing for dramatic effect.
Traitor.
I can't believe you're gonna be the star.
Not that you weren't great.
It's just you didn't even want the commercial here in the first place.
I knowBut when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade Save it for the cameras.
Ha ha ha! Places! You heard the man.
Ha ha ha! Playback! Action! welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on [Cluck cluck.]
Top-- ohh! [Cluck cluck.]
Ohh! Uhh! Ooh! Oh! I was tripped By that stupid chicken! It's not his fault.
His hat was too tight.
He did it on purpose.
It was fowl play.
[Groans.]
Oh, please.
Can you dance? Oh, of course.
The show must go--ohh! Ohh! Ow! WHO AM I GOING TO GET TO REPLACE HIM? Me! Me! Me! You know what this commercial needs? Adorable twins.
Wherever will we find some on such short notice? CERTAINLY NOT IN THIS HOTEL! IF ANYONE WANTS ME, I'll BE IN THE GYM smashing weights into my head! Hello! Can I get a little help? Boy, someone got up on the wrong side of the luggage carousel.
I'm sorry, guys.
I'm just cranky because I should have the lead in that commercial! I can't believe Herman carried a grudge for this long.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU'RE ON CAMERA.
Just my legs! Which admittedly are pretty fantastic.
I've seen better.
But I'm sure they were airbrushed.
I should just quit.
No.
You can't give up, mom.
You're always telling us to persevere.
Yeah, you should persevere.
By the way, what does that mean? It means you never give up.
You keep trying.
RightNo matter how many hideous failures you might have to face.
No matter how many times they tell you you're not young enough or pretty enough or have stumpy ankles.
Yeah, well, your pep talks aren't so peppy, either.
You know what we mean, mom.
You're really talented.
And if we can't star in that commercial, you should.
Yeah! You should go down and tell the director guy that you're not taking "no" for an answer! You're absolutely right! All right, one more time.
And remember It's step, cluck, cluck, step, not cluck, step, step, cluck.
[Cluck cluck.]
He's doing the best he can! You're scaring him.
I'm just giving him direction! While eating a chicken fajita! It could be his brother! You, sir, are not nice.
Didn't bother me when my mother said it.
DOESN'T BOTHER ME WHEN YOU SAY IT.
We're takin' a five.
Herman, we have to talk.
We were having a very nice talk at dinner when you ditched me.
Herman, it's been 15 years.
In 6 days.
It's almost our anniversary.
And me without a card.
Herman, don't you think it's time to forgive and forget and hire somebody who doesn't have feathers? Unless you want me to wear a boa.
I'd rather work with a boa than hire you! She's going down.
Warm up your dancing feet.
I said no! We gotta help her! This is mom's big break.
And she's not getting any younger! Well, neither are we! We're pushing 13, and I don't have a lot of cute left in me.
NowPack yourself and get out! Hey! Don't talk to our mom like that! You'd be lucky to hire her for your commercial.
In fact, you should hire all three of us.
Sure.
This hotel is our home.
And no one knows what makes it great better than we do.
We love this hotel and everyone in it.
They're our family.
Wow.
I think I'm feeling something.
Wait.
It's just the fajita backing up on me.
Herman-- don't you "Herman" me! You three will never be in my commercial! There's not a force in the universe that can change my mind! [Cell phone rings.]
Hello! [Sweetly.]
HelloMr.
T.
Uh-huh Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
I've changed my mind! You're hired! Mr.
tipton loves my idea of a family angle for the commercial.
I WISH WE'D THOUGHT OF THAT.
You mean we're in? All three: THANKS, Mr.
TIPTON! Guys! Guys! Come on! It's starting! Tv: We'll be back after these messages.
welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on top when you stay at the tipton the good times, they never stop because you're the star when you travel far the food is always gourmet at the tipton it's your place to stay we belong at the tipton the tipton is our place to play room service, movies, and ice cream in Paris, New York, or Bombay hang your hat on our welcome mat we want you to have it your way your way at the tipton at the tipton at the tipton your place to stay And bring the family! The tipton is the place to stay Check in! Yeah! Yeah! [Applause.]
Ohh Ha ha ha! It was a smart choice, making me the star of the commercial.
You weren't the star.
Of course I was.
I couldn't take my eyes off of me.
Mom, you were right-- SHOW BUSINESS IS DOG EAT DOG.
Or chicken.
But we never quit.
We persevered and hoped And dreamed for the failure of others.
And they didn't let us down.
That's my boys.
[Telephone rings.]
Hi, daddy.
Uh-huh Uh-huh.
Daddy loved the commercial.
[Sighs of relief.]
Uh-huh.
Reservations are pouring in.
Most of them from families.
And that means a lot more kids at the hotel! Nnnnooooo! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! I think he took that rather well.
Yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen, quiet, please.
Quiet, please.
Please, please, please.
Ladies and gentlemen, I need your attention.
All eyes on me.
I need quiet.
Now-- [Rattling.]
[Crashing and banging.]
Now, I've called you all here because-- [rattling.]
[Crash and rattling.]
[Contents rattling.]
[Contents rattling.]
I hope there will be no more disturbances.
Mom, Zack stole my allowance.
I did not steal.
I told you I was gonna take it.
Did not! Did too! Did not! Guys! Guys! [Contents rattling.]
Now, I have some disturbing news that concerns all of you.
If it's about the person who accidentally sat on a box of candy And then ate it, she's really, really sorry.
Um, if this isn't about me, could we make it about me? 'Cause otherwise, me is going.
No, what's it about is Mr.
tipton has chosen this hotel as the backdrop for his new commercial.
Woman: OOH! I know it's terribly inconvenient.
And to make matters worse, all employees will be asked to prepare an audition.
Now, I realize it's the last thing we all want to do, but we must make-- oh, my word! Oh! Oh! Oh! Ohhh! UhI think they took that rather well.
Here I am in your life here you are in mine yes, we have the suite life most of the time you and me, we got the world to see so come on down just me and you know what to do so come on down it's you and me, and me and you we got the whole place to ourselves you and me, we got it all for free so come on down this is the suite life we've got the suite life This is great! This is our chance to get on tv! Yeah.
I always thought you'd be on tv.
I just assumed you'd be in handcuffs.
You mean as a magician? Yeah.
That's it.
Oh, man! This line must stretch all the way to the ballroom.
With all these people, we're never gonna get picked.
WELL, YOU WON'T, BUT WHEN I BECOME A STAR, you can be one of my peeps.
Not the main peep.
Maybe a backup peep.
But-- not a peep out of you.
Zack, remember, rejection is a big part of show business.
You have to persevere, which includes standing in line with a million other people who share the same dream.
You're right, mom.
So hold our place in line and call us once you get to the front.
YEAH, NOW YOU'RE DREAMING! You're gonna wait right here.
Actually, you're gonna wait back there.
All: OH, MAN! [HUMMING Russian DANCE: TREPAK FROM NUTCRACKER SUITE.]
A cappella! [Humming.]
[Plates crash.]
Ta-da.
Congratulations.
I've seen a lot of lousy acts today, but yours is the first to make me actually fear for my life.
Well, that was nothin'.
You're right.
Wait until you see me Juggle! Ha ha! Dun, dunDun! All right.
Yippie kii-ay I'm a happy cowboy today Yaahh! It worked! BUT YOU NEVER WILL.
NOW, VAMOOSE.
Fine.
Then I'd like my rope back.
Yaaahhh! Take it away, dundee.
[Cluck cluck.]
[Snorting and puffing.]
[Cluck cluck cluck cluck.]
Isn't he amazing? That's youMaking that tippy-tappy sound.
Aren't I amazing? Next! I can't believe it! I know that director.
I once had a date with him! Remember to mention we're your kids.
He hates me.
And your name was? So the date didn't go well? Let's put it this way: I crawled out of the bathroom window before the salad arrived.
I can't go out there! I CAN.
HE DOESN'T HATE ME.
Wait until he sees your act.
Next! [Sighs.]
Who and what are you? I am the great kodinski.
And I'm goin' to perform my salute to spring.
It's an interpretive dance.
[Recording of birds chirping and brook babbling plays.]
[Birds chirping.]
[Water running; Thunder.]
[Thunder.]
[Dove coos; Splat.]
[Rain and wind.]
[Soft music with beat comes in.]
[Strong wind.]
[Birds twittering.]
[Music winds up to a finish.]
HERE'S MY SALUTE TO SPRING.
Next! You, sirAre no friend of the dance.
This is encouraging.
At least she's got some professional experience.
No plates or poultry.
Demina, cross my fingers for me.
I saw your face now I'm on the verge of romance and I've been lookin' for a while, let me tell you it's gone from my head to my feet now I'm startin' to dance I can feel it, can you feel it? You're the man-- Stop! I'd know those legs anywhere.
Last time I saw them, they were on their way to the ladies' room.
So you remember me.
Let's put it this way: Next! Hey! I kicked you out.
Don't think just 'cause you changed your clothes I won't recognize you.
No, you kicked my brother out.
And I don't blame you.
He's a speed bump on the road of entertainment.
Nice try! No, no! Really! We're twins.
Please.
Do you think I was born yesterday? NOT WITH THOSE WRINKLES.
Dun dun-dun-dun-dun dun dun Next! [Music starts.]
Next! I hate spotlights.
So do I.
Now, 1 and uh-2-- wait a minute.
I worked really hard on this.
And uh-3 and 4 You had your chance, sister.
Now make way for a real singer.
hold it! I am going to sing, you're going to like it, and you are going to get out of here! And now enjoy the song stylings of maddie Fitzpatrick.
In my dreams I can see you, shoo bop bop your eyes are like the stars and shine so bright when I wake in the mornin'-- shoo bop bop everything seems to feel so right shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop shoo bop ow! [Sound system reverberates.]
Why don't you shoo bop bop outta my life?! Next! [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
Man: HEY, LOOK WHO'S HERE.
Hi! Hi.
I'm gonna sing and dance.
[Soto voce.]
At the same time.
And I'll try to watch and hold down my lunch at the same time.
I'm a girl kind of girl [Out of timing.]
I love bracelets and rings diamonds and rubies and all of those things [Screeching.]
because spring [Off-key.]
is my favorite thing we're not talkin' zirconium [Screeching.]
spring is my favorite thing Sto-opp! Stop! Bring back the chicken.
Why on earth should I put you in my commercial? Because my daddy owns this hotel and signs your check.
Brilliant! YouAre hired! Ok, people! I need all the dancers playing guests to line up, please! Very tall guest Further right.
That's us! Move! [Faking mature voice.]
Sorry.
I'm so tall, it takes a while for it to get from my brain down to my feet.
It's not fair! HOW COME YOUR FACE GETS TO BE IN THE COMMERCIAL? Your face is my face.
Besides, your feet are in the commercial, and you don't hear me complainin'.
[Gasping for air.]
Speakin' of feet Don't you ever change your socks?! Ok, people.
It is Step, step, kick, and turn.
ALL RIGHT? VERY SIMPLE.
YOUR TURN.
Step, step, kick.
And turn.
OhWhoa Whoa! Ohhh! [Mature voice.]
I told you-- [own voice.]
I told you we were twins.
Hmm.
Double the stink! IT WAS HIS SOCKS! Boys, isn't it bad enough that I have to put up with these commercial people disrupting my hotel? Now, behave, or I'll have your mother take you to your room.
Guys, you're embarrassing me! YOU'RE EMBARRASSING YOU.
You're dancing luggage.
Ok, people, let's take it from the top.
And make it good.
Mr.
tipton is watching.
He is? From where? From his private jet.
He's getting the feed from that camera right over there.
All: HELLO, Mr.
TIPTON! Ohhh All right, people, places! Playback! Action! [Song intro plays.]
Welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? come and stay at the tipton the tipton keeps you on top whoa! Whoa! Is it just me, or are your ears bleeding? What? OhWe're gonna dub the voice.
Because you're the--whooh! Aah! Who's going to dub her feet? London? Sweetie? You are doing great! Thanks! If this were a bowling alley.
But remember? I told you to go to your left? I did go to my left.
Then go to your other left.
[Both talking with mouths full.]
This food is only for the crew.
Have you guys been eating it? No No Ok, people! Try to impress me! Like that's possible.
Playback! Action! welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? when you stay at the-- the-- the-- IT'S YOUR NAME! Oh! When you stay at theLondon Your last name! Well, I'm sorry! It's just all so confusing! The words, the music, the dancing! No! It's easy! Well, if it's so easy, then you try it.
OkI will.
Playback.
welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on top when you stay at the tipton the good times, they never stop because you're the star when you travel far the food is always gourmet Chorus: GOURMET at the tipton at the tipton at the tipton it's your place to stay the tipton is the place to stay Check in! [Applause.]
Brilliant! That was brilliant! Please tell me there was film in the camera.
I could But I'd be lying.
We used up all the film on the airhead heiress.
[Gasps.]
You're fired! London, YOU'RE FIRED.
Wait.
Do you not remember who I am? No! And apparently, neither do you! My father will not stand for this.
Right, daddy? [Telephone rings.]
That's him.
Hi, daddy.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh! I'm fired.
You're hired.
Yeah, I was gonna quit anyway.
No one makes a fool of London Tipton! Tipton! Tipton! I knew that.
I was pausing for dramatic effect.
Traitor.
I can't believe you're gonna be the star.
Not that you weren't great.
It's just you didn't even want the commercial here in the first place.
I knowBut when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade Save it for the cameras.
Ha ha ha! Places! You heard the man.
Ha ha ha! Playback! Action! welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on [Cluck cluck.]
Top-- ohh! [Cluck cluck.]
Ohh! Uhh! Ooh! Oh! I was tripped By that stupid chicken! It's not his fault.
His hat was too tight.
He did it on purpose.
It was fowl play.
[Groans.]
Oh, please.
Can you dance? Oh, of course.
The show must go--ohh! Ohh! Ow! WHO AM I GOING TO GET TO REPLACE HIM? Me! Me! Me! You know what this commercial needs? Adorable twins.
Wherever will we find some on such short notice? CERTAINLY NOT IN THIS HOTEL! IF ANYONE WANTS ME, I'll BE IN THE GYM smashing weights into my head! Hello! Can I get a little help? Boy, someone got up on the wrong side of the luggage carousel.
I'm sorry, guys.
I'm just cranky because I should have the lead in that commercial! I can't believe Herman carried a grudge for this long.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU'RE ON CAMERA.
Just my legs! Which admittedly are pretty fantastic.
I've seen better.
But I'm sure they were airbrushed.
I should just quit.
No.
You can't give up, mom.
You're always telling us to persevere.
Yeah, you should persevere.
By the way, what does that mean? It means you never give up.
You keep trying.
RightNo matter how many hideous failures you might have to face.
No matter how many times they tell you you're not young enough or pretty enough or have stumpy ankles.
Yeah, well, your pep talks aren't so peppy, either.
You know what we mean, mom.
You're really talented.
And if we can't star in that commercial, you should.
Yeah! You should go down and tell the director guy that you're not taking "no" for an answer! You're absolutely right! All right, one more time.
And remember It's step, cluck, cluck, step, not cluck, step, step, cluck.
[Cluck cluck.]
He's doing the best he can! You're scaring him.
I'm just giving him direction! While eating a chicken fajita! It could be his brother! You, sir, are not nice.
Didn't bother me when my mother said it.
DOESN'T BOTHER ME WHEN YOU SAY IT.
We're takin' a five.
Herman, we have to talk.
We were having a very nice talk at dinner when you ditched me.
Herman, it's been 15 years.
In 6 days.
It's almost our anniversary.
And me without a card.
Herman, don't you think it's time to forgive and forget and hire somebody who doesn't have feathers? Unless you want me to wear a boa.
I'd rather work with a boa than hire you! She's going down.
Warm up your dancing feet.
I said no! We gotta help her! This is mom's big break.
And she's not getting any younger! Well, neither are we! We're pushing 13, and I don't have a lot of cute left in me.
NowPack yourself and get out! Hey! Don't talk to our mom like that! You'd be lucky to hire her for your commercial.
In fact, you should hire all three of us.
Sure.
This hotel is our home.
And no one knows what makes it great better than we do.
We love this hotel and everyone in it.
They're our family.
Wow.
I think I'm feeling something.
Wait.
It's just the fajita backing up on me.
Herman-- don't you "Herman" me! You three will never be in my commercial! There's not a force in the universe that can change my mind! [Cell phone rings.]
Hello! [Sweetly.]
HelloMr.
T.
Uh-huh Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
I've changed my mind! You're hired! Mr.
tipton loves my idea of a family angle for the commercial.
I WISH WE'D THOUGHT OF THAT.
You mean we're in? All three: THANKS, Mr.
TIPTON! Guys! Guys! Come on! It's starting! Tv: We'll be back after these messages.
welcome to the tipton where everything is sweet try joining us for dinner may we offer you a seat? next time, stay at the tipton the tipton puts you on top when you stay at the tipton the good times, they never stop because you're the star when you travel far the food is always gourmet at the tipton it's your place to stay we belong at the tipton the tipton is our place to play room service, movies, and ice cream in Paris, New York, or Bombay hang your hat on our welcome mat we want you to have it your way your way at the tipton at the tipton at the tipton your place to stay And bring the family! The tipton is the place to stay Check in! Yeah! Yeah! [Applause.]
Ohh Ha ha ha! It was a smart choice, making me the star of the commercial.
You weren't the star.
Of course I was.
I couldn't take my eyes off of me.
Mom, you were right-- SHOW BUSINESS IS DOG EAT DOG.
Or chicken.
But we never quit.
We persevered and hoped And dreamed for the failure of others.
And they didn't let us down.
That's my boys.
[Telephone rings.]
Hi, daddy.
Uh-huh Uh-huh.
Daddy loved the commercial.
[Sighs of relief.]
Uh-huh.
Reservations are pouring in.
Most of them from families.
And that means a lot more kids at the hotel! Nnnnooooo! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! I think he took that rather well.
Yeah.