Leave It to Beaver (1957) s01e30 Episode Script
Music Lesson
1
(bright music)
How you comin' with baseball, Wally?
Well, we didn't have a regular practice today.
Coach gave us some lecture on how to lose with a smile.
How you doin' with Mr. Willet?
Fine.
He taught us how to spit on a reed today.
(bright music)
("Leave it to Beaver" theme music)
[Announcer] "Leave It to Beaver."
Starring Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow,
and Jerry Mathers as The Beaver.
(jaunty music)
Say, I got home after you fellas
had gone to bed last night.
How'd you make out with the baseball tryouts?
Oh great, Dad.
The coach says right now
I'm practically first string pitcher.
Well, that's swell, Wally.
Hey, did ya hear that, June?
First string pitcher.
How 'bout you, Beaver?
Did you go out for the C team?
Oh sure, Dad.
The coach threw each guy two flies.
I caught the first one, but the second one
hit me on the head.
On the head?
I knew something like this would happen.
It hit me real hard, but I didn't cry, though.
What did the coach say?
He said I wasn't good enough for the team.
If I'da knowed that I wouldn't have bothered not to cry.
(audience laughs)
Well, Beaver
Hey, Dad, it's gonna be real neat.
We get to wear uniforms and get to ride on buses
to games and everything.
Well, Wally, I'm really proud of you.
Hey, I tell ya what, after I get home from work tonight
if you want to we'll go over to the vacant lot
and play some catch.
Gee, that'd be great, Dad.
Me, too?
Well, we'll be using a hard ball, Beaver.
I expect you better just hit the homework.
Oh, Beaver, I wouldn't be upset
about not making the team.
There are lots of other things you can do at school.
Sure, there are.
And anyway, you're gonna be a ballplayer one of these days.
That's right.
And in the meantime, well, there must be something else
you like to do.
Something that especially appeals to you.
Well, I like to wade in big puddles.
(audience laughs)
But I don't think they have a team for that.
(playful plodding music)
Hi.
Have a good day at the office?
Miserable.
That's nice.
Oh, dear, there's something over here from the boys' school
on the desk for you to sign.
Well, if it's their report cards
I'd better way till I'm in a better humor.
It's permission for the Beaver to take music lessons.
Music?
Uh-huh.
He's never been interested in music before.
Well, I guess he was so disappointed
about not making the baseball team
he wanted to go out for something.
(Ward grunts)
Least there's nothing in the band to hit him on the head.
(audience laughs)
I wouldn't be too sure of that.
You really goin' out for the band, Beaver?
Yeah, I get to wear a uniform,
and for $5 you get free lessons.
(audience laughs)
(playful plodding music)
Boy, they got all kinds of instruments here.
Which one are you gonna play?
I don't know, it's kinda hard to tell
by lookin' which one's the easiest.
What's that?
Well, that's a tuba.
Tuba.
Well, you're just too small for that, Beaver.
And anyway, Tuey's been playin' the tuba
since the fifth grade.
Does he have to polish it all the time?
Nah, he gets his mom to do it for him.
(audience laughs)
Here's somethin' that looks good.
What's that?
Well, that's a clarinet.
I think I'll go out for that.
It looks easy to carry.
And it's made of wood so I won't have to polish it.
(audience laughs)
I sure hope it sounds good.
Oh, supper's ready, boys.
You'd better get washed up.
Okay, Dad.
I understand you're going to take some music lessons
at school, Beaver.
Yeah, I think I'm gonna go out for the clarinet.
I don't know how it sounds, but I like the way it looks.
Well, that's fine.
I do hope, though, that it's not gonna turn out
like the ice skating lessons you had last year.
Remember, you quit after one week.
Oh no, I don't think I'll fall down playin' the clarinet.
(audience laughs)
(chuckles) I don't think so either.
I just hope you stick with it, that's all.
Oh sure, Dad.
(bell rings) (upbeat music)
Hey, Beav, how you doin' with the clarinet?
Great, Wally.
They taught us how to take it apart today.
(bright music)
How you comin' with baseball, Wally?
Well, we didn't have a regular practice today.
Coach gave us some lecture on how to lose with a smile.
(audience laughs)
How you doin' with Mr. Willet?
Fine.
He taught us how to spit on a reed today.
(upbeat music)
- Hi.
- Hi, Mom.
Hi, Mom.
I've been worried about you two.
Oh, we ate dinner with the team
on the way home from Bellport.
Good.
I take it you won.
You bet we did.
The old pro here only allowed 12 runs.
That good?
Well, it is when your team's scoring 14.
(audience laughs)
Hey, where's the Beaver?
I wanna tell him all about the game.
He's been waiting for you to come home.
This is a big night for him.
He's gonna play something for us.
Oh, on the clarinet?
Uh-huh.
Oh boy, I gotta hear this.
You know, he looks like he's been doing this all his life.
And after only five lessons.
Six, Mom.
(audience laughs)
Come on, Beav, will you quit showin' off
and play somethin'?
Now, be quiet, Wally.
(lips smacking)
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Well, that was very nice, Beaver.
Wasn't it, Ward?
Oh yes, yes, it certainly was.
As a matter of fact, it sounded vaguely familiar.
Well, of course it did.
It's "America."
Duh duh duh ♪
Sure, of course it was "America."
(audience laughs)
Hey, Beav, play it again.
Sounds like there's somethin' missin'.
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Yep, that's "America" all right.
But, Beav, tell me, why do you always stop there?
'Cause that's how far I memorized.
Mr. Willet says as soon as I learn the last few notes
I can go on with the other guys.
Oh, oh, that's fine.
I'm sure glad you decided to stick with it, Beav.
You wanna come upstairs and watch me take it apart?
Well, why don't you fellas go on up now?
I'll be up a little later.
Okay, Dad.
Wally, you didn't say nothin'.
How'd you like it?
Well, for a guy that just learned
how to spit on the reed a couple days ago,
I thought it was pretty good.
(audience laughs)
(Ward and June laughing)
Oh, Ward, wasn't he cute with that clarinet?
You gotta give him credit, he certainly thinks
he can play it, doesn't he?
(bright music)
I practiced my piece four hours yesterday.
And my mother says if I don't make it,
she's gonna phone Mr. Willet.
Mr. Willet told me I got a pretty good chance.
Mr. Willet didn't tell me anything,
but I think I got a pretty good chance, too.
You, Beaver?
Mr. Willet's just givin' you lessons
because he had an extra clarinet.
You're awful, isn't he, Whitey?
He's not really awful.
He just sounds that way when he plays.
(audience laughs)
You just wait and see what happens this afternoon, Beaver.
You just wait and see.
(somber music)
(gentle piano music)
(disjointed piano music)
(audience laughs)
(gentle piano music)
Yes, I think with a little work that'll be fine, Judy.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
(audience laughs)
Bye, Mr. Willet.
Bye, Judy.
All right now, Herbert.
(plodding trumpet music)
(audience laughs)
Excuse me.
(plodding trumpet music)
(audience laughs)
Thank you, Thomas.
I don't believe we're quite ready
for the orchestra just yet.
Perhaps with a little more practice, hm?
(gentle clarinet music)
Well, that's gonna be very
(gentle clarinet music)
(audience laughs)
Oh, that's fine, Whitey, you're making real progress.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
I practiced a lot at home,
except when my big brother hits me.
(audience laughs)
Well, you keep it up, Whitey.
I think you'll be a credit to our woodwinds.
Bye, Mr. Willet.
All right, now, Theodore, let's hear what you can do.
Right now?
Right now.
We were working on "America" now weren't we?
Yes, Mr. Willet.
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Well, Beaver, can't you go any further?
I could, but it wouldn't be "America."
Well I,
I see.
I'll learn it, Mr. Willet, really I will.
I can't be in the band, huh?
Well, you see, Theodore,
(somber music)
You and Whitey are the youngest
that came out for the orchestra,
and Whitey's been taking lessons for six months
so naturally he's quite far ahead of you.
Maybe next year.
Oh, maybe I could just sit in the band
and pretend like I was playing?
Well now, that wouldn't be fair either to you
or the other children, now would it?
I guess not.
Do I have to give back the clarinet?
Well, Theodore, I'll be working with the others
every day after school, but I guess you can keep it
for a while and you can practice at home.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
(children chattering)
Oh, how'd ya do, Beav?
Who me?
Yeah, ya had tryouts today.
Great, Wally, just great.
Oh, good.
(somber music)
Hi, Beaver.
Hi, Mom.
Wally still at school?
Yeah, he had to practice baseball.
Oh, that's right, you're father's
gonna stop by and watch them play.
Yeah, I seen him there.
Oh?
How come you aren't at school practicing with the band?
I think they let us go early today.
Oh.
Honey, don't spoil your dinner.
Oh no, Mom.
Mom, I guess Dad's pretty glad about Wally
makin' the baseball team, huh?
He certainly is.
And I guess he's kinda glad
about me and the clarinet, too.
Oh, he certainly is, Beaver.
Well, you're only in the second grade
and to be in the school band,
that's quite an accomplishment.
Yeah.
And I guess Dad would feel pretty bad
if Wally was no good and got thrown off the team.
Yes, yes, he would, he'd be quite upset.
I thunk so.
Beaver, Wally hasn't gotten into any trouble
on the baseball team, has he?
Oh no, Mom.
With Billy Eahart havin' the measles,
Wally's just about the best player in the whole school.
Well then, why all this talk?
I don't know.
I guess I just like to suppose things
that aren't gonna happen.
(jaunty music)
Hurry up, boys, you're gonna be late.
So long, Mom.
Here's your lunch.
So long, Dad.
So long, Wally.
Say hey, you gonna pitch again today?
Yeah, Dad, my arm feels great.
(Ward chuckles)
So long, Mom, so long, Dad.
See ya later.
- Bye.
- Beaver!
Don't forget your clarinet.
I almost forgot it. (Chuckles)
Hey, Beav, how you comin' along with the band?
Oh fine.
My fingers feel great.
Swell.
Goodbye.
[Beaver] Bye!
Ward, I know you're happy about Wally
and the baseball team, but, well I think you should make
a little more fuss maybe over Beaver and his clarinet.
Well, June, I'm proud as can be about him
being in the band.
After all, he's only in the second grade.
Look, I'll tell you what.
Tonight we'll ask him to play for us again.
Oughta show a lot of improvement after two weeks, huh?
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
(Wally laughs)
Now, Wally, I wouldn't laugh at your brother.
I think he's shown remarkable progress.
Don't you, June?
Oh yes, yes, I do.
Thank you.
Could I go now?
Certainly.
[Wally] I'd better go, too. (Laughs)
Hey, June, I didn't wanna say anything to discourage him,
but isn't that the same tune he played two weeks ago?
Yes, it is.
Maybe that's Mr. Willet's system.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe when he gets the whole band together
it comes out all right.
(audience laughs)
You think I oughta call him up and just see
how the Beav's doing?
Oh no, Ward, I wouldn't do that.
I'd hate him to think we were like Judy's mother.
(audience laughs)
(gentle music)
Hey, Beav, that junk ya just played,
it was the same junk ya played before, wasn't it?
Maybe it was.
All right, Beav, when'd they kick you out of the band?
Two weeks,
two weeks ago.
And you've been carryin' that thing back and forth
just to make it look good.
What a goof.
You can't get away with it, pretending you're in the band.
They're gonna catch you
and then you're gonna get in trouble.
Well, if I do get in trouble, it's all your fault.
My fault?
Yeah, if I had to have a brother,
why did it have to be one that could play baseball so good?
(jaunty music)
(audience laughs)
I'll get my breakfast downtown this morning.
Now why would Wally wanna carry messy old shoelaces
like that in his pocket?
Those are not shoelaces.
I think they're very old worms.
(audience laughs)
Worms?
Hey, what's this?
Oh, I found that in another pocket.
Looks like some sort of a fang.
Eh, it's a horse tooth.
Now, why would anyone want a horse tooth?
Oh, I don't know.
I just know I wouldn't trust a kid who didn't want one.
(audience laughs)
Ward, look, here's a notice from the boys' school.
Grant Avenue School band concert,
seven p.m. Thursday night.
Hey, that's tonight.
Yes.
Why, I wonder why the Beaver didn't show it to us.
He's so proud of being in the band.
Ah, he probably just stuck it in his pocket
along with the horse tooth and forgot bout it.
Well, that's funny.
Here it is, the Beaver's big night
and he doesn't even mention it.
Isn't that just like a kid?
Goodbye, dear.
Have a nice breakfast.
(gentle music)
Hey, Beav, will ya tell me somethin'?
What are you doin'?
Puttin' on my blue suit.
What for, you can't go to the band concert.
You're not in it.
But Mom and Dad think I'm in it.
So, you're just gonna put on your blue suit
and walk outta here with Mom and Dad
with a clarinet under your arm?
What else can I do?
Anyway, somethin' good might happen on the way.
Like what?
Like I might get sick in the car.
Beaver, a guy just can't get sick when he wants to.
I guess not.
Can you think of anything, Wally?
Well, you couldn't play the clarinet
if you wrecked your fingers.
How could I wreck my fingers?
Well, you could slam 'em in the door or somethin'.
Wally, help me tie my tie.
(audience laughs)
How come, you're not gettin' dressed, aren't ya goin'?
No, I don't wanna be there and watch what happens
when they find out what you did.
Shoulda told 'em a long time ago.
But Dad was so proud of you for gettin'
on the baseball team.
I wanted him to have something to be proud of me for.
Yeah, well.
Wally, where ya goin'?
Well, I gotta get some stuff downstairs.
Darling, what are you so nervous about?
You aren't gonna play tonight.
Well, I certainly I am.
I'm gonna be right in there straining
for every note with him.
Ba ba ba bum ♪
Oh hi, where's the Beaver?
You're not dressed.
Well, he'll be right down in a couple minutes.
But I think there's something you oughta know.
Well, what?
Well
Well, the Beaver's not in the band.
What do you mean he's not in the band?
We're going to hear him play tonight.
Well, Mr. Willet flunked him outta the band
three weeks ago.
Well, he's been taking his clarinet
to school every morning.
I know, he's been hopin' somethin' good would happen
before you found out.
Now, why would he deliberately try
to deceive us like this?
Well, you got such a kick outta me makin'
the baseball team and everything,
he wanted you to like him for somethin', too.
(somber music)
Oh.
I'm all set to go.
Well, Beaver,
Beaver, something's come up and your mother and I
are not going to be able to go to the concert.
Oh?
Yeah, we're awfully sorry to disappoint you.
You mean I'm gonna have to go by myself?
Well, I don't think a fellow your age
should go out alone at night.
Yes, Beaver, why don't you go upstairs
and take your suit off and maybe
we can all go some other time.
Yeah, maybe we can go some other time.
I don't think Mr. Willet will really miss me.
Hey, wait up, Beav.
Sure, Wally.
(somber music)
Oh, Ward, can you imagine what he's gone through
for the last few weeks, just
so you'd still be proud of him?
Yep.
You know something, June?
We'd be a lot better parents if we didn't wait
till they did something good to let 'em know
we're proud of 'em.
Every once in a while, just for no reason at all,
we oughta tell 'em we love them.
I just wanted to remind you boys to brush your teeth
before you go to bed tonight.
Your mother'll be up in a few minutes
to say goodnight to you.
Okay, Dad, goodnight.
Goodnight, Wally.
Goodnight, Beav.
Dad?
Yeah, what is it, Beav?
(gentle music)
Thanks.
Well, thanks for what, Beaver?
For pretending you still thunk I was in the band.
Oh.
Well, don't you worry about it, Beaver.
You'll make it next year.
(bright music)
(upbeat music)
(bright music)
How you comin' with baseball, Wally?
Well, we didn't have a regular practice today.
Coach gave us some lecture on how to lose with a smile.
How you doin' with Mr. Willet?
Fine.
He taught us how to spit on a reed today.
(bright music)
("Leave it to Beaver" theme music)
[Announcer] "Leave It to Beaver."
Starring Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow,
and Jerry Mathers as The Beaver.
(jaunty music)
Say, I got home after you fellas
had gone to bed last night.
How'd you make out with the baseball tryouts?
Oh great, Dad.
The coach says right now
I'm practically first string pitcher.
Well, that's swell, Wally.
Hey, did ya hear that, June?
First string pitcher.
How 'bout you, Beaver?
Did you go out for the C team?
Oh sure, Dad.
The coach threw each guy two flies.
I caught the first one, but the second one
hit me on the head.
On the head?
I knew something like this would happen.
It hit me real hard, but I didn't cry, though.
What did the coach say?
He said I wasn't good enough for the team.
If I'da knowed that I wouldn't have bothered not to cry.
(audience laughs)
Well, Beaver
Hey, Dad, it's gonna be real neat.
We get to wear uniforms and get to ride on buses
to games and everything.
Well, Wally, I'm really proud of you.
Hey, I tell ya what, after I get home from work tonight
if you want to we'll go over to the vacant lot
and play some catch.
Gee, that'd be great, Dad.
Me, too?
Well, we'll be using a hard ball, Beaver.
I expect you better just hit the homework.
Oh, Beaver, I wouldn't be upset
about not making the team.
There are lots of other things you can do at school.
Sure, there are.
And anyway, you're gonna be a ballplayer one of these days.
That's right.
And in the meantime, well, there must be something else
you like to do.
Something that especially appeals to you.
Well, I like to wade in big puddles.
(audience laughs)
But I don't think they have a team for that.
(playful plodding music)
Hi.
Have a good day at the office?
Miserable.
That's nice.
Oh, dear, there's something over here from the boys' school
on the desk for you to sign.
Well, if it's their report cards
I'd better way till I'm in a better humor.
It's permission for the Beaver to take music lessons.
Music?
Uh-huh.
He's never been interested in music before.
Well, I guess he was so disappointed
about not making the baseball team
he wanted to go out for something.
(Ward grunts)
Least there's nothing in the band to hit him on the head.
(audience laughs)
I wouldn't be too sure of that.
You really goin' out for the band, Beaver?
Yeah, I get to wear a uniform,
and for $5 you get free lessons.
(audience laughs)
(playful plodding music)
Boy, they got all kinds of instruments here.
Which one are you gonna play?
I don't know, it's kinda hard to tell
by lookin' which one's the easiest.
What's that?
Well, that's a tuba.
Tuba.
Well, you're just too small for that, Beaver.
And anyway, Tuey's been playin' the tuba
since the fifth grade.
Does he have to polish it all the time?
Nah, he gets his mom to do it for him.
(audience laughs)
Here's somethin' that looks good.
What's that?
Well, that's a clarinet.
I think I'll go out for that.
It looks easy to carry.
And it's made of wood so I won't have to polish it.
(audience laughs)
I sure hope it sounds good.
Oh, supper's ready, boys.
You'd better get washed up.
Okay, Dad.
I understand you're going to take some music lessons
at school, Beaver.
Yeah, I think I'm gonna go out for the clarinet.
I don't know how it sounds, but I like the way it looks.
Well, that's fine.
I do hope, though, that it's not gonna turn out
like the ice skating lessons you had last year.
Remember, you quit after one week.
Oh no, I don't think I'll fall down playin' the clarinet.
(audience laughs)
(chuckles) I don't think so either.
I just hope you stick with it, that's all.
Oh sure, Dad.
(bell rings) (upbeat music)
Hey, Beav, how you doin' with the clarinet?
Great, Wally.
They taught us how to take it apart today.
(bright music)
How you comin' with baseball, Wally?
Well, we didn't have a regular practice today.
Coach gave us some lecture on how to lose with a smile.
(audience laughs)
How you doin' with Mr. Willet?
Fine.
He taught us how to spit on a reed today.
(upbeat music)
- Hi.
- Hi, Mom.
Hi, Mom.
I've been worried about you two.
Oh, we ate dinner with the team
on the way home from Bellport.
Good.
I take it you won.
You bet we did.
The old pro here only allowed 12 runs.
That good?
Well, it is when your team's scoring 14.
(audience laughs)
Hey, where's the Beaver?
I wanna tell him all about the game.
He's been waiting for you to come home.
This is a big night for him.
He's gonna play something for us.
Oh, on the clarinet?
Uh-huh.
Oh boy, I gotta hear this.
You know, he looks like he's been doing this all his life.
And after only five lessons.
Six, Mom.
(audience laughs)
Come on, Beav, will you quit showin' off
and play somethin'?
Now, be quiet, Wally.
(lips smacking)
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Well, that was very nice, Beaver.
Wasn't it, Ward?
Oh yes, yes, it certainly was.
As a matter of fact, it sounded vaguely familiar.
Well, of course it did.
It's "America."
Duh duh duh ♪
Sure, of course it was "America."
(audience laughs)
Hey, Beav, play it again.
Sounds like there's somethin' missin'.
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Yep, that's "America" all right.
But, Beav, tell me, why do you always stop there?
'Cause that's how far I memorized.
Mr. Willet says as soon as I learn the last few notes
I can go on with the other guys.
Oh, oh, that's fine.
I'm sure glad you decided to stick with it, Beav.
You wanna come upstairs and watch me take it apart?
Well, why don't you fellas go on up now?
I'll be up a little later.
Okay, Dad.
Wally, you didn't say nothin'.
How'd you like it?
Well, for a guy that just learned
how to spit on the reed a couple days ago,
I thought it was pretty good.
(audience laughs)
(Ward and June laughing)
Oh, Ward, wasn't he cute with that clarinet?
You gotta give him credit, he certainly thinks
he can play it, doesn't he?
(bright music)
I practiced my piece four hours yesterday.
And my mother says if I don't make it,
she's gonna phone Mr. Willet.
Mr. Willet told me I got a pretty good chance.
Mr. Willet didn't tell me anything,
but I think I got a pretty good chance, too.
You, Beaver?
Mr. Willet's just givin' you lessons
because he had an extra clarinet.
You're awful, isn't he, Whitey?
He's not really awful.
He just sounds that way when he plays.
(audience laughs)
You just wait and see what happens this afternoon, Beaver.
You just wait and see.
(somber music)
(gentle piano music)
(disjointed piano music)
(audience laughs)
(gentle piano music)
Yes, I think with a little work that'll be fine, Judy.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
(audience laughs)
Bye, Mr. Willet.
Bye, Judy.
All right now, Herbert.
(plodding trumpet music)
(audience laughs)
Excuse me.
(plodding trumpet music)
(audience laughs)
Thank you, Thomas.
I don't believe we're quite ready
for the orchestra just yet.
Perhaps with a little more practice, hm?
(gentle clarinet music)
Well, that's gonna be very
(gentle clarinet music)
(audience laughs)
Oh, that's fine, Whitey, you're making real progress.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
I practiced a lot at home,
except when my big brother hits me.
(audience laughs)
Well, you keep it up, Whitey.
I think you'll be a credit to our woodwinds.
Bye, Mr. Willet.
All right, now, Theodore, let's hear what you can do.
Right now?
Right now.
We were working on "America" now weren't we?
Yes, Mr. Willet.
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
Well, Beaver, can't you go any further?
I could, but it wouldn't be "America."
Well I,
I see.
I'll learn it, Mr. Willet, really I will.
I can't be in the band, huh?
Well, you see, Theodore,
(somber music)
You and Whitey are the youngest
that came out for the orchestra,
and Whitey's been taking lessons for six months
so naturally he's quite far ahead of you.
Maybe next year.
Oh, maybe I could just sit in the band
and pretend like I was playing?
Well now, that wouldn't be fair either to you
or the other children, now would it?
I guess not.
Do I have to give back the clarinet?
Well, Theodore, I'll be working with the others
every day after school, but I guess you can keep it
for a while and you can practice at home.
Thank you, Mr. Willet.
(children chattering)
Oh, how'd ya do, Beav?
Who me?
Yeah, ya had tryouts today.
Great, Wally, just great.
Oh, good.
(somber music)
Hi, Beaver.
Hi, Mom.
Wally still at school?
Yeah, he had to practice baseball.
Oh, that's right, you're father's
gonna stop by and watch them play.
Yeah, I seen him there.
Oh?
How come you aren't at school practicing with the band?
I think they let us go early today.
Oh.
Honey, don't spoil your dinner.
Oh no, Mom.
Mom, I guess Dad's pretty glad about Wally
makin' the baseball team, huh?
He certainly is.
And I guess he's kinda glad
about me and the clarinet, too.
Oh, he certainly is, Beaver.
Well, you're only in the second grade
and to be in the school band,
that's quite an accomplishment.
Yeah.
And I guess Dad would feel pretty bad
if Wally was no good and got thrown off the team.
Yes, yes, he would, he'd be quite upset.
I thunk so.
Beaver, Wally hasn't gotten into any trouble
on the baseball team, has he?
Oh no, Mom.
With Billy Eahart havin' the measles,
Wally's just about the best player in the whole school.
Well then, why all this talk?
I don't know.
I guess I just like to suppose things
that aren't gonna happen.
(jaunty music)
Hurry up, boys, you're gonna be late.
So long, Mom.
Here's your lunch.
So long, Dad.
So long, Wally.
Say hey, you gonna pitch again today?
Yeah, Dad, my arm feels great.
(Ward chuckles)
So long, Mom, so long, Dad.
See ya later.
- Bye.
- Beaver!
Don't forget your clarinet.
I almost forgot it. (Chuckles)
Hey, Beav, how you comin' along with the band?
Oh fine.
My fingers feel great.
Swell.
Goodbye.
[Beaver] Bye!
Ward, I know you're happy about Wally
and the baseball team, but, well I think you should make
a little more fuss maybe over Beaver and his clarinet.
Well, June, I'm proud as can be about him
being in the band.
After all, he's only in the second grade.
Look, I'll tell you what.
Tonight we'll ask him to play for us again.
Oughta show a lot of improvement after two weeks, huh?
(gentle out-of-tune clarinet music)
(Wally laughs)
Now, Wally, I wouldn't laugh at your brother.
I think he's shown remarkable progress.
Don't you, June?
Oh yes, yes, I do.
Thank you.
Could I go now?
Certainly.
[Wally] I'd better go, too. (Laughs)
Hey, June, I didn't wanna say anything to discourage him,
but isn't that the same tune he played two weeks ago?
Yes, it is.
Maybe that's Mr. Willet's system.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe when he gets the whole band together
it comes out all right.
(audience laughs)
You think I oughta call him up and just see
how the Beav's doing?
Oh no, Ward, I wouldn't do that.
I'd hate him to think we were like Judy's mother.
(audience laughs)
(gentle music)
Hey, Beav, that junk ya just played,
it was the same junk ya played before, wasn't it?
Maybe it was.
All right, Beav, when'd they kick you out of the band?
Two weeks,
two weeks ago.
And you've been carryin' that thing back and forth
just to make it look good.
What a goof.
You can't get away with it, pretending you're in the band.
They're gonna catch you
and then you're gonna get in trouble.
Well, if I do get in trouble, it's all your fault.
My fault?
Yeah, if I had to have a brother,
why did it have to be one that could play baseball so good?
(jaunty music)
(audience laughs)
I'll get my breakfast downtown this morning.
Now why would Wally wanna carry messy old shoelaces
like that in his pocket?
Those are not shoelaces.
I think they're very old worms.
(audience laughs)
Worms?
Hey, what's this?
Oh, I found that in another pocket.
Looks like some sort of a fang.
Eh, it's a horse tooth.
Now, why would anyone want a horse tooth?
Oh, I don't know.
I just know I wouldn't trust a kid who didn't want one.
(audience laughs)
Ward, look, here's a notice from the boys' school.
Grant Avenue School band concert,
seven p.m. Thursday night.
Hey, that's tonight.
Yes.
Why, I wonder why the Beaver didn't show it to us.
He's so proud of being in the band.
Ah, he probably just stuck it in his pocket
along with the horse tooth and forgot bout it.
Well, that's funny.
Here it is, the Beaver's big night
and he doesn't even mention it.
Isn't that just like a kid?
Goodbye, dear.
Have a nice breakfast.
(gentle music)
Hey, Beav, will ya tell me somethin'?
What are you doin'?
Puttin' on my blue suit.
What for, you can't go to the band concert.
You're not in it.
But Mom and Dad think I'm in it.
So, you're just gonna put on your blue suit
and walk outta here with Mom and Dad
with a clarinet under your arm?
What else can I do?
Anyway, somethin' good might happen on the way.
Like what?
Like I might get sick in the car.
Beaver, a guy just can't get sick when he wants to.
I guess not.
Can you think of anything, Wally?
Well, you couldn't play the clarinet
if you wrecked your fingers.
How could I wreck my fingers?
Well, you could slam 'em in the door or somethin'.
Wally, help me tie my tie.
(audience laughs)
How come, you're not gettin' dressed, aren't ya goin'?
No, I don't wanna be there and watch what happens
when they find out what you did.
Shoulda told 'em a long time ago.
But Dad was so proud of you for gettin'
on the baseball team.
I wanted him to have something to be proud of me for.
Yeah, well.
Wally, where ya goin'?
Well, I gotta get some stuff downstairs.
Darling, what are you so nervous about?
You aren't gonna play tonight.
Well, I certainly I am.
I'm gonna be right in there straining
for every note with him.
Ba ba ba bum ♪
Oh hi, where's the Beaver?
You're not dressed.
Well, he'll be right down in a couple minutes.
But I think there's something you oughta know.
Well, what?
Well
Well, the Beaver's not in the band.
What do you mean he's not in the band?
We're going to hear him play tonight.
Well, Mr. Willet flunked him outta the band
three weeks ago.
Well, he's been taking his clarinet
to school every morning.
I know, he's been hopin' somethin' good would happen
before you found out.
Now, why would he deliberately try
to deceive us like this?
Well, you got such a kick outta me makin'
the baseball team and everything,
he wanted you to like him for somethin', too.
(somber music)
Oh.
I'm all set to go.
Well, Beaver,
Beaver, something's come up and your mother and I
are not going to be able to go to the concert.
Oh?
Yeah, we're awfully sorry to disappoint you.
You mean I'm gonna have to go by myself?
Well, I don't think a fellow your age
should go out alone at night.
Yes, Beaver, why don't you go upstairs
and take your suit off and maybe
we can all go some other time.
Yeah, maybe we can go some other time.
I don't think Mr. Willet will really miss me.
Hey, wait up, Beav.
Sure, Wally.
(somber music)
Oh, Ward, can you imagine what he's gone through
for the last few weeks, just
so you'd still be proud of him?
Yep.
You know something, June?
We'd be a lot better parents if we didn't wait
till they did something good to let 'em know
we're proud of 'em.
Every once in a while, just for no reason at all,
we oughta tell 'em we love them.
I just wanted to remind you boys to brush your teeth
before you go to bed tonight.
Your mother'll be up in a few minutes
to say goodnight to you.
Okay, Dad, goodnight.
Goodnight, Wally.
Goodnight, Beav.
Dad?
Yeah, what is it, Beav?
(gentle music)
Thanks.
Well, thanks for what, Beaver?
For pretending you still thunk I was in the band.
Oh.
Well, don't you worry about it, Beaver.
You'll make it next year.
(bright music)
(upbeat music)