Peter Gunn (1958) s01e33 Episode Script
Lady Windbell's Fan
1
Thank you.
For watching.
Thank.
You for watching.
And so, when all seems lost, and the
dragon of great evil makes ready to devour.
Lady Windbell, suddenly the friendly
Willow tree offers her a fan, a magic fan,
with which she can render the dragon completely helpless.
Hello, Pete.
I'm glad you could make it.
Hi, Johnny.
Edie, this is Johnny Chang.
He's the owner of the Green Dragon.
Johnny, this is Edie Hart.
How do you do, Miss Hart?
I'm good.
I'm glad to meet you, Johnny.
I've heard so much about the Green Dragon.
They say it's the best club in Chinatown.
Well, thank you very much.
Pete, I called you over because I need a favor.
Yeah?
What kind of a favor, Johnny?
That fan, Pete.
Keep your eyes on that fan.
Everything started since its arrival.
We've had nothing but trouble with that fan.
Very attractive girl, too.
Her name is Lillian Kwan.
She's my fiancée.
This is Lady Windbell.
Actual name is Miss Lillian Kwan,
Miss Edie Hart, and Mr. Peter Gunn.
How do you do?
How do you do?
I enjoyed your dance, Miss Kwan.
Pete, I have to get back to Mother's.
I'm on in a few minutes.
Just stay where you are.
I'll find my way out.
Excuse us.
I enjoy your number more each time.
This shouldn't take long.
Why don't you take the car?
Well, Miss Kwan, I understand best wishes are in order.
Well, Mr. Gunn, that remains to be seen.
I guess Johnny hasn't told you.
His father's completely opposed to our marriage.
You know Mr. Chang, Sr. Only by reputation.
I understand he's the unofficial mayor of Chinatown.
Mr. Chang's the most powerful,
influential man in this district.
He believes strongly in tradition.
But your marriage to Johnny wouldn't fit
into that tradition, huh?
He thinks that I'm a wicked dancing girl.
I didn't see anything wicked.
About the fan, Pete.
It came last Monday night.
Lillian found it in her dressing room after
she came from her performance with a note.
It said only, you will receive a phone call.
Did you?
Yes.
And a voice I didn't know said, guard the fan.
It will pave the way to your happiness.
That was all.
Last night, a man broke in through the back window,
knocked Lillian down as she went to her dressing room.
Luckily, she had slipped the fan to me during curtain call.
Pete, I think that's the man who just came in.
Don't turn around now.
He's wearing a gray suit.
Yes, I think that's he.
Lillian, did you say you had the fan with you?
Look, you take it back to your dressing room.
Bring me back a package that looks as
though you'd wrapped a fan in it.
Do you have the note that came with it?
Yes.
You bring that, too, huh?
Johnny, I'll be right back.
I think I'll help Lillian with that package.
Give me Mr. Gunn's check, please.
Are you all right, Mr. Gunn?
What happened?
He came to my dressing room, grabbed the fan, I screamed.
You finish wrapping the package.
Let's get upstairs.
Lillian, there's no need to worry, Johnny,
so let's just not mention the fight, huh?
All right, Mr. Gunn.
Get what you wanted, Pete?
I think so, Johnny.
I'll try and take good care of it.
I'll walk you out.
Fine.
Good night, Lillian.
Good night, Mr. Gunn.
How do you feel, Cy?
Hi.
He can't hear you, also can't talk.
Death mute.
He's here all the time.
Devoted to love.
Lillian, he'll do anything for her.
She helped him out once.
Bunch of juvenile delinquents were making fun of him.
She chased him away.
Well, I better get back inside, Pete.
Good luck.
Be careful.
Thanks.
I'll be in touch.
Johnny's father.
All right, who sent you to follow me?
Who is it?
Chang.
Lai Chang.
What does he want with the fan?
I don't know.
He just sent me to get it.
Get out.
Okay, we'll pay you back.
We'll pay Mr. Chang a little visit.
Come on.
If the terror of evildoers will honor one
of my deplorable chairs by resting his
divine body in it, I can assure him the
chair shall afterward be burned.
So no lesser being may use it.
If this foul one has offended the prince
of thief-catchers, the greatest of guns,
if it is your excellency's wish that he be
cut to pieces inch by inch
I don't think I'm that much offended, Mr. Chang.
Ah, if it were not that the king of finders-out knows
everything, I should marvel that he has heard my lowly name.
I'm marveling a little you've heard mine.
May I, in my dull and straightforward way,
ask, why do you want the Taichung fan?
I wish to avoid further bloodshed over
object of inconsiderable worth,
having value solely by reason of sentiment
for House of Chang.
Has there been bloodshed?
That is my belief, Mr. Gunn.
On one night last week, I received message
from a dealer in France by the name of Wang.
Oh, you do not read Chinese?
One of my many failings.
I tell you in confidence what it says.
In my possession is instrument of your downfall.
What is price you will pay for silence
concerning year of the serpent?
Sounds like blackmail.
What does it mean, do you know?
Unfortunately, I do.
I will explain.
On following evening, last week, that
same Wang, dealer in France, was murdered.
Found stabbed on counter in his disreputable shop.
Body was discovered by my servant, Luffet.
Luffet, who had gone to scene to question
this Wang, fearing police discovery that
might lead to implication of Chang,
Luffet brought these clues.
Not ten dollars.
Hard job.
How much?
Ten thousand dollars?
That's pretty high bargaining.
You realize, of course, that this evidence
should be turned over to the police.
Do so then, Mr. Gunn, if you must.
If you would honor my hovel by partaking of Chang's
inferior tea, I will impart information about the fan.
Mmm, it's delicious.
Ah, now, the fan.
What has my disobedient son told you about it?
Well, this lowly person cannot give out
information without receiving information.
At the same time.
The feeble wits of the old are matched only by the
follies of young men infatuated with sing-song-dance-girl.
Tai Sung Fan, for many centuries treasure
in House of Chang, was removed from said
house and put to base purpose, namely to enhance charms of
sing-song-dance-girl in vulgar display
before a serious audience.
Well, have you met Lillian?
She's a very nice girl.
I'm sure you'd like her.
The same girl, to a certain knowledge,
is not only low in cost, but ruthless in
desire to achieve the power and wealth of this family.
Well, you, uh you're gonna tell me about the fan?
Ah, yes, history of Tai Sung Fan.
And having great love for Queen of Rival Monarch,
Emperor Dyson presented same with fan of Rival Monarch.
This exciting jealousy of said Margolian chieftain
had precipitated more than any year of division.
Again, we are outwitted.
Do not harm him.
Take him back safely.
I'm not going to wait any longer for that character.
If he shows up, Barney, you tell him I
took the car and he can just grab a taxi.
Okay, Edie.
I'll even lend him the cab fare.
Pete!
Pete!
Oh, great.
Come on, Pete.
Wake up.
Hey, you're sleeping on my time.
Come on.
Wake up.
You wake?
What time is it?
It's quarter after two.
Oh.
Is that all you can say?
No, we have plenty to say.
Not now.
Look at you.
Your hair's all messed up.
Where's your comb?
What's that?
Hmm?
Look, honey, while I shake these Chinese
cobwebs out of my head, would you go into.
Mother's and phone the Green Dragon and
tell Johnny and Lillian to wait for me and
tell Lillian to invite that deaf-mute
pencil vendor in for a cup of coffee, huh?
How about it?
I suppose I'm supposed to grab a cab.
Oh, would you do that, honey?
You know what?
What?
You're all right.
You're all right in my book, Charlie.
You're a nut.
Johnny, did you ever hear of a man by the
name of Wong, dealer in fans?
Only a little.
He's the man who got killed last week, right?
You, Lillian?
No.
You, Cy?
You forget.
He can't hear.
Oh, yeah.
That's right.
It's too bad.
He can't talk either.
I'm sure he could tell us plenty if he could.
You see, Cy was in Wong's shop the night he was murdered.
He had talked to him.
How can you tell that, Pete?
He, uh, left behind some of his conversation.
A little careless.
Guess he was in a hurry.
Yeah, it's a shame he can't talk because two
innocent people could be charged with that murder.
Your father, Johnny, and you, Lillian.
Lillian, don't!
Don't shoot!
Lillian, dog!
I can't believe it.
He's not the first phony beggar, Johnny.
All right, Cy.
What did Wong want $10,000 for?
It was the fan, wasn't it?
I can't.
I can't talk in front of them.
Okay.
Do you mind?
Just be a few minutes.
I only wanted to help her, that's all.
The old man, Johnny's father, he didn't
want them to get married.
Well, I found out something about him,
something he did a long time ago, in 1905.
Was that the year of the serpent?
How did you know?
Figures.
Go ahead.
He was an escaped convict, some kind of
political thing in Chicago.
I got hold of the old newspapers.
One in Chinese and one American paper with
pictures of him when he was in prison.
And he's so high and mighty.
He thinks Lillian is nothing but a sing-song dance girl.
It's not true.
To me, she is a queen, empress.
I got this idea.
I would have the papers made into a fan.
And then I would start threatening him.
And he would have to say, OK.
They can get married.
Si, don't you realize you've just made things worse?
You've killed a man.
Not only that, you've made Chang Lai Chang
think that it was Lillian who'd been blackmailing him.
Johnny, did you call police headquarters?
Tell them I want to talk to Lieutenant Jacoby.
OK, Pete.
Si, you'd better come with us.
This poor house is again honored by a
visit from the most farsighted of private eyes.
Mr. Chang, I've brought your son and the
girl he wants to marry.
I've also brought the fan.
I know the whole story.
But the most important thing for you to
believe is my word that the girl had
absolutely nothing to do with this whole affair.
She only wants to be happy with your son.
You've never met her, Mr. Chang.
I think you should.
Now.
My son, what is your name?
Lillian.
Both of you grasp the hands of this frail
old person and receive celestial blessings.
I'm sorry, Mr. Chang.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
♪♪♪♪.
Thank you.
For watching.
Thank.
You for watching.
And so, when all seems lost, and the
dragon of great evil makes ready to devour.
Lady Windbell, suddenly the friendly
Willow tree offers her a fan, a magic fan,
with which she can render the dragon completely helpless.
Hello, Pete.
I'm glad you could make it.
Hi, Johnny.
Edie, this is Johnny Chang.
He's the owner of the Green Dragon.
Johnny, this is Edie Hart.
How do you do, Miss Hart?
I'm good.
I'm glad to meet you, Johnny.
I've heard so much about the Green Dragon.
They say it's the best club in Chinatown.
Well, thank you very much.
Pete, I called you over because I need a favor.
Yeah?
What kind of a favor, Johnny?
That fan, Pete.
Keep your eyes on that fan.
Everything started since its arrival.
We've had nothing but trouble with that fan.
Very attractive girl, too.
Her name is Lillian Kwan.
She's my fiancée.
This is Lady Windbell.
Actual name is Miss Lillian Kwan,
Miss Edie Hart, and Mr. Peter Gunn.
How do you do?
How do you do?
I enjoyed your dance, Miss Kwan.
Pete, I have to get back to Mother's.
I'm on in a few minutes.
Just stay where you are.
I'll find my way out.
Excuse us.
I enjoy your number more each time.
This shouldn't take long.
Why don't you take the car?
Well, Miss Kwan, I understand best wishes are in order.
Well, Mr. Gunn, that remains to be seen.
I guess Johnny hasn't told you.
His father's completely opposed to our marriage.
You know Mr. Chang, Sr. Only by reputation.
I understand he's the unofficial mayor of Chinatown.
Mr. Chang's the most powerful,
influential man in this district.
He believes strongly in tradition.
But your marriage to Johnny wouldn't fit
into that tradition, huh?
He thinks that I'm a wicked dancing girl.
I didn't see anything wicked.
About the fan, Pete.
It came last Monday night.
Lillian found it in her dressing room after
she came from her performance with a note.
It said only, you will receive a phone call.
Did you?
Yes.
And a voice I didn't know said, guard the fan.
It will pave the way to your happiness.
That was all.
Last night, a man broke in through the back window,
knocked Lillian down as she went to her dressing room.
Luckily, she had slipped the fan to me during curtain call.
Pete, I think that's the man who just came in.
Don't turn around now.
He's wearing a gray suit.
Yes, I think that's he.
Lillian, did you say you had the fan with you?
Look, you take it back to your dressing room.
Bring me back a package that looks as
though you'd wrapped a fan in it.
Do you have the note that came with it?
Yes.
You bring that, too, huh?
Johnny, I'll be right back.
I think I'll help Lillian with that package.
Give me Mr. Gunn's check, please.
Are you all right, Mr. Gunn?
What happened?
He came to my dressing room, grabbed the fan, I screamed.
You finish wrapping the package.
Let's get upstairs.
Lillian, there's no need to worry, Johnny,
so let's just not mention the fight, huh?
All right, Mr. Gunn.
Get what you wanted, Pete?
I think so, Johnny.
I'll try and take good care of it.
I'll walk you out.
Fine.
Good night, Lillian.
Good night, Mr. Gunn.
How do you feel, Cy?
Hi.
He can't hear you, also can't talk.
Death mute.
He's here all the time.
Devoted to love.
Lillian, he'll do anything for her.
She helped him out once.
Bunch of juvenile delinquents were making fun of him.
She chased him away.
Well, I better get back inside, Pete.
Good luck.
Be careful.
Thanks.
I'll be in touch.
Johnny's father.
All right, who sent you to follow me?
Who is it?
Chang.
Lai Chang.
What does he want with the fan?
I don't know.
He just sent me to get it.
Get out.
Okay, we'll pay you back.
We'll pay Mr. Chang a little visit.
Come on.
If the terror of evildoers will honor one
of my deplorable chairs by resting his
divine body in it, I can assure him the
chair shall afterward be burned.
So no lesser being may use it.
If this foul one has offended the prince
of thief-catchers, the greatest of guns,
if it is your excellency's wish that he be
cut to pieces inch by inch
I don't think I'm that much offended, Mr. Chang.
Ah, if it were not that the king of finders-out knows
everything, I should marvel that he has heard my lowly name.
I'm marveling a little you've heard mine.
May I, in my dull and straightforward way,
ask, why do you want the Taichung fan?
I wish to avoid further bloodshed over
object of inconsiderable worth,
having value solely by reason of sentiment
for House of Chang.
Has there been bloodshed?
That is my belief, Mr. Gunn.
On one night last week, I received message
from a dealer in France by the name of Wang.
Oh, you do not read Chinese?
One of my many failings.
I tell you in confidence what it says.
In my possession is instrument of your downfall.
What is price you will pay for silence
concerning year of the serpent?
Sounds like blackmail.
What does it mean, do you know?
Unfortunately, I do.
I will explain.
On following evening, last week, that
same Wang, dealer in France, was murdered.
Found stabbed on counter in his disreputable shop.
Body was discovered by my servant, Luffet.
Luffet, who had gone to scene to question
this Wang, fearing police discovery that
might lead to implication of Chang,
Luffet brought these clues.
Not ten dollars.
Hard job.
How much?
Ten thousand dollars?
That's pretty high bargaining.
You realize, of course, that this evidence
should be turned over to the police.
Do so then, Mr. Gunn, if you must.
If you would honor my hovel by partaking of Chang's
inferior tea, I will impart information about the fan.
Mmm, it's delicious.
Ah, now, the fan.
What has my disobedient son told you about it?
Well, this lowly person cannot give out
information without receiving information.
At the same time.
The feeble wits of the old are matched only by the
follies of young men infatuated with sing-song-dance-girl.
Tai Sung Fan, for many centuries treasure
in House of Chang, was removed from said
house and put to base purpose, namely to enhance charms of
sing-song-dance-girl in vulgar display
before a serious audience.
Well, have you met Lillian?
She's a very nice girl.
I'm sure you'd like her.
The same girl, to a certain knowledge,
is not only low in cost, but ruthless in
desire to achieve the power and wealth of this family.
Well, you, uh you're gonna tell me about the fan?
Ah, yes, history of Tai Sung Fan.
And having great love for Queen of Rival Monarch,
Emperor Dyson presented same with fan of Rival Monarch.
This exciting jealousy of said Margolian chieftain
had precipitated more than any year of division.
Again, we are outwitted.
Do not harm him.
Take him back safely.
I'm not going to wait any longer for that character.
If he shows up, Barney, you tell him I
took the car and he can just grab a taxi.
Okay, Edie.
I'll even lend him the cab fare.
Pete!
Pete!
Oh, great.
Come on, Pete.
Wake up.
Hey, you're sleeping on my time.
Come on.
Wake up.
You wake?
What time is it?
It's quarter after two.
Oh.
Is that all you can say?
No, we have plenty to say.
Not now.
Look at you.
Your hair's all messed up.
Where's your comb?
What's that?
Hmm?
Look, honey, while I shake these Chinese
cobwebs out of my head, would you go into.
Mother's and phone the Green Dragon and
tell Johnny and Lillian to wait for me and
tell Lillian to invite that deaf-mute
pencil vendor in for a cup of coffee, huh?
How about it?
I suppose I'm supposed to grab a cab.
Oh, would you do that, honey?
You know what?
What?
You're all right.
You're all right in my book, Charlie.
You're a nut.
Johnny, did you ever hear of a man by the
name of Wong, dealer in fans?
Only a little.
He's the man who got killed last week, right?
You, Lillian?
No.
You, Cy?
You forget.
He can't hear.
Oh, yeah.
That's right.
It's too bad.
He can't talk either.
I'm sure he could tell us plenty if he could.
You see, Cy was in Wong's shop the night he was murdered.
He had talked to him.
How can you tell that, Pete?
He, uh, left behind some of his conversation.
A little careless.
Guess he was in a hurry.
Yeah, it's a shame he can't talk because two
innocent people could be charged with that murder.
Your father, Johnny, and you, Lillian.
Lillian, don't!
Don't shoot!
Lillian, dog!
I can't believe it.
He's not the first phony beggar, Johnny.
All right, Cy.
What did Wong want $10,000 for?
It was the fan, wasn't it?
I can't.
I can't talk in front of them.
Okay.
Do you mind?
Just be a few minutes.
I only wanted to help her, that's all.
The old man, Johnny's father, he didn't
want them to get married.
Well, I found out something about him,
something he did a long time ago, in 1905.
Was that the year of the serpent?
How did you know?
Figures.
Go ahead.
He was an escaped convict, some kind of
political thing in Chicago.
I got hold of the old newspapers.
One in Chinese and one American paper with
pictures of him when he was in prison.
And he's so high and mighty.
He thinks Lillian is nothing but a sing-song dance girl.
It's not true.
To me, she is a queen, empress.
I got this idea.
I would have the papers made into a fan.
And then I would start threatening him.
And he would have to say, OK.
They can get married.
Si, don't you realize you've just made things worse?
You've killed a man.
Not only that, you've made Chang Lai Chang
think that it was Lillian who'd been blackmailing him.
Johnny, did you call police headquarters?
Tell them I want to talk to Lieutenant Jacoby.
OK, Pete.
Si, you'd better come with us.
This poor house is again honored by a
visit from the most farsighted of private eyes.
Mr. Chang, I've brought your son and the
girl he wants to marry.
I've also brought the fan.
I know the whole story.
But the most important thing for you to
believe is my word that the girl had
absolutely nothing to do with this whole affair.
She only wants to be happy with your son.
You've never met her, Mr. Chang.
I think you should.
Now.
My son, what is your name?
Lillian.
Both of you grasp the hands of this frail
old person and receive celestial blessings.
I'm sorry, Mr. Chang.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
♪♪♪♪.