My Three Sons (1960) s01e36 Episode Script

1
(theme song plays)
(Robbie and Chip arguing)
Who took my wool socks?!
They're in the wash!
CHIP: Help, Mike! Pencil stealer, come here, will ya?
Aw, come on, you guys, get out of my room.
Hey, you're messing up my stuff. (Tramp barking)
Come on, Chip, Robbie, will you get out of
MIKE: All right, you guys, now cut out all the noise
and play your children's games in your own room!
Now, come on, cut the noise out!
You know, Mike might find out how quiet it is
around here if he dropped in some time when he's away.
MIKE: Boy, you're sure right, Bub.
The older I get, the less patience I have with children.
I can't take it anymore.
Don't they ever grow up? (Ooga horn blasts)
All right, you guys, quit playing with my ooga horn
or I'll lock my room while I'm gone.
See what I mean, Dad?
Well, Mike, old-timer,
when you're up in that fire lookout this summer,
you won't have to worry about the, uh, "children"
playing with your ooga horn.
I'm not going to take it with me.
No?
What are you going to do when things get dull up there?
Dull? Are you kidding? In a fire tower?
In the middle of all that excitement?
STEVE: What excitement, Mike?
Well, bears and mountain lions and wildcats.
And chipmunks.
Yeah, all kinds of wild animals.
I better take my snake bite kit.
You're not going to find it in there.
You know, Mike, it's not going
to be all excitement up there.
Oh, I know Dad, but when we're not busy
protecting government property or fighting forest fires
or climbing down some deep canyon to rescue hikers
What are they doing down there?
They're lost, what do you think?
Oh
Well, Joe and I'll probably be fishing
at the creek having a bull session.
Uh, what creek?
And, uh, what are you looking for in there, Mike?
Your sweat socks. Oh.
There's bound to be a creek.
Who's Joe?
Joe Mitchell Dad's old air force buddy.
You know him.
No, I don't know him. Do you?
Well, not yet, but I will after spending
a whole summer with him in a fire tower, huh, Dad?
Yeah. Oh, thanks.
Oh, you mean that guy you're
going to do all the fishing with
in one of those creeks you're
going to find up there, maybe.
Very funny.
BUB: How about laughing your way down to the clothes hamper
with those sheets you just stepped over?
Boy, will I be glad to get up in the wilderness.
At least there they treat you like a man.
Boy, life's funny.
That's just the way Joe Mitchell talked
when he joined our squadron over in England.
Treats you like a man
How does he think I'm treating him?
Everything was always going to be high adventure
and big excitement for Joe.
I've been treating him like a man
ever since he was a baby.
Then he found out that flying was just
hours and hours of boredom.
Punctuated by moments of sheer panic.
How am I going to get along
without that kid all summer long?
Talk about being wet behind the ears.
I know the Forest Service wants to keep the forest green,
but do they want their employees the same way?
Well, we were green once, too, Bub.
We haven't always been quite as ripe as we are now.
Oh, yeah?
I've been ripe for so long, I'm darn near rotten.
Boy, isn't this country the greatest?!
Nature in the raw, huh, Mr. Mitchell?
Yeah, I guess you could call it that.
I'm sure looking forward to seeing the tower.
How much farther is it?
About 500 feet.
That way?
That way.
You mean, that's it?
That's where we're going?
That's it.
Hey, that's even higher than I thought it was going to be.
Boy, what a spot!
And there we'll be.
Watchdogs of the wilderness.
Perched up there like eagles
over all of nature's mighty forces.
Ready to swoop down any minute
and challenge those who disobey.
Boy, talk about a subject for a book.
Ouch.
One of nature's mighty forces.
(panting)
Boy, that's quite a climb.
Boy
A guy ought to have a parachute going up there.
You want to go first?
After you, mighty eagle.
(laughs): Yeah.
Okay.
Well, here goes nothing.
(wind howling)
Well, we made it!
(keys clink) Oh, I'm sorry.
Boy, talk about reaching majestic heights!
Ten miles above the petty world of man!
5,240 feet.
Yeah.
Hello, birds!
(chuckles)
It's really blowing up here, isn't it?
About average.
Hat's it like in a really high wind?
You feel it.
I mean, it-it would never
Oh, we haven't lost a tower since, uh, the wooden one
over at Cedar Point went over 25 years ago.
No kidding?
Well, what happened to the guys inside?
Oh, boy, if the guys back home could only see this.
Those poor characters stuck all summer long
in a town where nothing happens.
I mean nothing.
That's yours.
This place is like an outpost.
An outpost in space!
(sighs)
Hey, I bet I'd feel like Scott Crossfield
in his X-15 as he zoomed through
(wood creaking)
Hey, wh-what's wrong?
The tower's moving.
Well, it sways a little in the wind.
MIKE: Yeah.
That's Mother Nature's warning, isn't it?
The pulsating reminder of ever present danger.
You can't see it, you can't hear it,
but you can feel it.
Here.
Yeah, it's here.
It's all around us.
It's a quiet kind of danger.
You site through this firefinder.
Get the smoke, set it in the crosshairs.
Then you take a reading off the outside circle.
That gives you the direction and degrees
of the fire from this point.
Then you pick up the phone, give the information
to the Ranger's station in Silver Springs.
By the way, don't answer the phone
unless you hear our ring Two longs, one short.
I'll fill you in on the details as we go along.
Well, we're in business.
I'll flip you for the first watch.
You can take it.
Hey, that's great.
Oh, and now that we know each other,
I want you to know, I know there are
a lot of things I don't know.
Of course, I know you'll have to help me out,
but I want to do my share.
I mean, I don't want you to make
things easy on me, Mr. Mitchell.
All right.
Oh, thanks Joe.
You're welcome Mike.
(wind blowing)
(water running)
(clears throat)
(coughs)
Hey, what's that over in the canyon?
Is that smoke?
A little haze.
MIKE: Wind stays pretty much the same.
It doesn't change much.
Nope.
The temperature's about the same, too.
Yup weather's still good.
I suppose it's like this for a couple of weeks and then
Fow! Everything happens at once.
I guess I'll write a letter.
BUB: Uh, talk about excitement,
this is it. Whoa! You did it!
Quiet, you guys, for Pete's sake! (Tramp barks)
Don't you want to hear Mike's letter?
Yeah, we're listening. (Tramp barks)
BUB: "We never know from one minute to the next"
"just what's going to happen. CHIP: Whoa!"
That's it!
Uh, "Being on, uh, fire lookout
emergencies, we never can tell"
"what's going to happen (Tramp barking)
"And there's really something doing all the time
and we've got to be on"
Quiet, will you, Tramp?
"We've really got to be on our toes."
It makes living down here seem pretty quiet.
Huh? (Tramp barking)
I said, it makes living down here seem pretty quiet!
CHIP: Come on, let's do it right this time. (Tramp barking)
Tramp, sit down here and keep quiet.
(wind blowing)
(clock ticking)
(slow, steady dripping)
(metallic squeaking)
(clock ticking)
Hey, no water!
Something's happened!
Belt slipped off the pump.
Here, take over.
Yeah.
I wonder how that happened.
Boy, I sure hope Joe can fix that.
I'd hate to be up here without water.
Well, we'll just have to carry it up by hand.
So, no problem.
Boy, wait'll I tell Dad that we had to carry
our drinking water up from the spring by hand.
BOY (shouting): Hello!
GIRL (shouting): Anybody up there?!
Hi!
Hi!
How's the weather up there?
Oh, it's great!
Stick around, I'm coming down!
Imagine living up there.
Yeah. Boy, what a great place to spend the summer.
He's cute!
Look, sis, so far today you've said that about two rangers,
three hikers, and a middle-aged fisherman.
Shh! What a terrible thing to say.
Hi. Hi. Hi.
Boy, am I glad to see some real live human beings.
Welcome to Needle Point.
We just hiked over the pass.
Oh, you going to Silver Springs?
No, no, we're headed for Thunder Rock.
Well, you're-you're going the wrong direction.
Your trail turns off at the spring you just passed.
Oh, no.
Do you spend the whole summer up there?
I sure do.
Say, you want to come up and see it?
Love to.
But we can't not if we're going to get
to Thunder Rock in time to meet Mom and Dad.
Oh, gee, it'll only take five minutes.
No, come on.
We'll practically have to run as it is.
Run?
But I'm tired.
You were tired when we left home.
Come on.
Well Here, I'll show you the way.
You can see it from right over here.
Boy, take it from me
Never go hiking with a woman, especially your sister.
GIRL: I'd love to go up and see what it's like up there.
MIKE: Oh, it's a terrific spot.
Gets pretty exciting sometimes.
Like today ran right out of water.
Mike!
Hey, Douglas!
Yeah!
That's Joe Mitchell, my partner.
Be right there, Joe!
Got a couple of lost hikers here.
Just showing them down to the Thunder Rock trail.
They can find it themselves!
Get up here!
Just a second, Joe!
JOE: Right now!
Well, I better get up there.
It sounds like another emergency.
Gee, I hope it isn't serious.
Well, you you never know.
Your, uh, your trail takes off right down there.
Oh, thanks.
Nice to have met you. Same to you.
Now, stay on the trail,
and be careful of your campfires.
So long.
Bye.
Sorry, Joe. I had a couple of lost hikers.
Let's go.
(wind blowing)
Now, look
I know it's been tough on you up here.
You're lonely, bored and disappointed.
But you took a man's job,
and you're going to do it like a man or get out.
Now the next time you leave this tower
when you're on watch, just keep going.
BOY: We found the trail!
Have a good summer, you lucky guy!
Who's Al? Who?
What?
Al. Al Who?
"Dear Dad, Bub and Al"
(playing weakly) Let me see that.
That's "Dear Dad, Bub and all."
Oh. A, double-L. All.
Hey, is that letter from Mike? Let me see it, Chip.
I'll read it to you. Are you kidding, that'll take all day.
"Dear Dad, Bub and all" Give it to me, will ya?
(Chip screaming) Hey, come on, you little squirt.
Come here, you two! Bring that back here.
Come here. Come here. Whoa!
Give me that letter, doggone it.
Maybe your Dad would like to read.
Mike's letter in one piece for a change.
Sit down. Listen to it. Yeah. Yeah.
"Dear Dad, Bub, and Al"
I mean, "All."
Uh "How's Robbie doing with his trumpet lessons?"
"Tell him to stick with it.
The kid's got a lot of talent."
Are you sure that letter's from Mike?
Maybe the altitude is getting him, huh?
Yeah, maybe.
"What's Chip doing? Still drawing pictures?
Ask him to draw one of Tramp and send it to me."
It sure doesn't sound like Mike.
Yeah. Maybe he's sick or something.
Well, the darned kid
doesn't say a word about what he's doing up there.
22 23 24
(grunting): Gotta stay in condition.
Not gonna get flabby.
That's the great thing about this darn job
you can't tell the difference
between being on duty and off duty.
Locked up in these same four walls
24 hours (grunting and panting)
Four hours on and four hours off
for four weeks and what for?
(thud) Ow!
Now that really hurt.
Well, that's what I get for trying to stay in condition.
(sighs)
Aw, the heck with it.
I'll just get fat and flabby.
Who cares?
(sighs)
Nobody sees me up here anyway.
Like a couple of monkeys in a cage.
We think we're so smart.
Well, we're not!
Monkeys in a cage.
(knuckles pop loudly)
Ever since I was a kid,
they told me if I did that, I'd get big knuckles.
Well, they're wrong.
They don't look so big to me.
See?
What do you think?
(animatedly): Well, I don't think much of anything.
Oh, hi. What are you doing up here?
Oh, I just thought I'd drop in
and see how things were going.
Oh, just fine.
Nice weather, isn't it?
Yes, it's nice and warm.
Mm-hmm. Yes!
Shh!
What's the matter?
We don't want to talk too loud.
We might disturb Joe.
(loudly): Well, I'm sorry,
but every once in a while
a guy wants to talk to somebody.
(sighs)
(cot creaking)
Well, there is one thing I've learned this summer.
I'm man enough to admit it, too.
You know what it is I learned this summer?
That I'm man enough to admit?
Okay, I'll tell you.
You don't like me.
You just plain don't like me.
What do you think of that?
Well, all right, if you if you don't like me,
why don't you get rid of me?
If I had some green kid
working for me, and hated his guts,
I-I'd get rid of him, I'd fire him, yes, sir.
That's what I'd do.
I'd tell him to pack up his bags
and get out the first thing in the morning.
Why aren't you man enough to fire me?
Here. Take over.
Go on. I'm giving you your chance. Fire me!
I'm gonna go down to the river,
check the level.
All right, if you don't fire me, I quit!
Did you hear me, Joe?
(door closes)
I quit!
Said, did you hear me, Joe? I quit.
I'm walking right out of here.
Yeah, I heard you.
Okay, but I suggest you do it
after the storm.
Storm?
What storm?
(loud, crackling thunder)
(upbeat, instrumental rock music plays)
(wind howling)
(sighs)
(loud, crackling and rumbling thunder)
(wind whistling)
(loud thunderclap)
(clinking)
(wind howling, thunder rumbling)
(creaking)
(phone cranking)
(loud, rolling thunder)
(loud thudding and clattering)
(squeaking)
(wood creaking)
(clattering)
(loud thudding and clattering)
(loud, rumbling thunder)
(wind howling)
Joe? Joe?! Joe!
(thunderclaps)
Joe?!
(wind howling)
(phone ringing)
(creaking)
(phone ringing)
(wind howling, creaking)
(wood creaking, phone ringing)
(phone continues ringing)
(thunderclaps)
(metallic creaking)
Needle Point Lookout.
Douglas here.
(loud clattering)
Douglas?
This is Parker down at Silver Springs.
How you doing up there?
(thudding)
It's-It's really blowing.
(loud crash)
(wind howling)
Our power's off but we're still here.
That's the stuff!
Stick with it, boy!
Check you later.
(loud thudding crash)
(creaking)
(wind howling)
(thunder crashing)
"And maybe you and Chip can spend a few days
"up here at the end of summer.
"Now that I've finally let Joe get a word in edgewise,
he's been telling me about"
Edgewise? What's that mean?
It means shut up and listen.
"He's been telling me
"about some caves around here we can explore.
We had a little"
Hey, neat! Let me see!
"We had a little storm last night.
Nothing much. Wind blew a little."
"But we had a storm last night, the worst in 25 years,"
"and Mike was alone in the tower."
(whistles)
"I was stuck down at the river
"and couldn't get back, but I knew what it was like
"in that tower with a 70-mile wind blowing.
Mike must've been scared green."
Boy, I'll bet he was, huh?
"And another thing.
"I'm finally beginning" to find the ex
ex"
Excitement, dumbo.
Now, give it here, will you?
Hey, what did you get in reading last time anyhow?
"A."
Boy. Grammar school sure is a snap nowadays.
Wasn't like that when I was a kid.
"To find the excitement
"that I was looking for.
"And they aren't the storms and fires,
"and big adventures I look forward to."
"The real excitements up here"
"are the sunrises and the sunsets, and"
"Animals and"
Wait. "Animals and"
"And trees, and the wildflowers and the"
"Just do me one favor, Steve.
"Never tell Mike that it was I who phoned the tower
"at the height of the storm.
"I called from the field phone at the river,
"and said I was Parker at Silver Springs.
"Remember the time in England during the blitz
when you called me in the airfield control tower?"
Well, now, don't stop there.
I'm sorry. I was just thinking, Bub.
"That was the night I was so scared,"
"I was ready to pack up and run."
(chuckles)
"I hope I have returned the favor.
Regards from your friend Joe."
Oh, quite a letter.
(coughing)