Palm Royale (2024) s02e02 Episode Script

1
[Linda] Just tell me if you're good.
[attorney] I'm fine. I'm so good…
- Okay.
- …at real estate.
- What?
- Uh, look, listen.
Just… the less you say, the better.
- I know that.
- [door opens]
[groans] You again?
[Tom] Me again.
[Linda] You would think
the US government would be smarter
than to entrust the interrogation
of a would-be assassin
to Palm Beach's head meter maid.
Special Agent trainee now.
I guess framing upstart heiresses
comes with certain career advantages.
Did you attempt to assassinate
President Richard Nixon?
I tried to do the opposite,
and it landed me here.
Because I looked the part.
Am I a woman? Guilty.
Am I a radical woman? Guilty.
If you wanna charge me for those things,
have at it.
I'm guilty of all of it.
You feel better?
She just went on and on.
Didn't get anything usable.
We'll be the judge of that.
God and country are in your debt.
[elevator bell dings]
[reporter] We interrupt your regularly
scheduled programming
with a bombshell report out of Florida,
where Linda Shaw, the prime suspect
in the assassination attempt
on President Nixon,
turned her interrogation into a manifesto.
When asked directly about her role
in the attempt on the president's life,
here's what she had to say.
- I'm guilty of all of it.
- ["Petticoat Junction theme" playing]
We'll bring you more
of this developing story,
but for now please enjoy
Petticoat Junction already in progress.
[Maxine] In Palm Beach, the real battles
are fought in the off-season.
[bell ringing]
Battle plans are hatched.
Alliances are forged.
Coups and counter-coups abound.
- It's modern, Perry. [chuckles]
- Hmm.
Axel was very forward-thinking.
Wow.
And now we're the forward ones.
[Maxine] Power is consolidated.
And it was high time to reclaim mine.
[music ends]
- [Evelyn] Put it down, John Henry.
- [groans]
[stammers] Well, then I just wanna plunge
this rusty pike straight into Douglas.
Now don't make me regret signing you
out of the booby hatch.
I'm not going to hurt you.
I'm your conservator. [chuckles]
And it's in your best interest
to hand the weapon to me.
- Just take it.
- [grunts]
[breathes heavily]
I'm having such awful thoughts, Evelyn.
Awful. Lots of them. [breathes heavily]
Maxine, have you learned nothing?
In Palm Beach, we swallow our rage.
I can't, Evelyn.
It's too big. I'll choke on it.
Darling, that's what quaaludes
and vodka are for.
Come with me.
It's time we start planning your exile.
That's how we do it here.
Women in your situation
disappear for a season.
Disappear, meaning?
Go abroad.
Take the waters in Baden-Baden.
As your conservator,
I give you permission to travel to Tuscany
and eat a tomato that changes your life.
Or if travel is beyond
your mental capacity,
you can always hole up
in the disgraced socialite apartment
- on the top floor of the Palm Royale.
- Hole up?
Either way, after nine months,
you reappear with a new face
or a new husband after next
season's scandals have eclipsed your own.
How about Douglas travels somewhere
and tries a tomato,
and I stay here with you?
Keep up the crazy talk, Maxine.
I'll march you right back to the bin.
Happens to be where I'm going now anyway.
Going to see Linda. Poor thing.
Charged with a crime she didn't commit.
Yes. [sighs] What a terrible tragedy.
[Maxine] It's a whole mess.
If we could just find Mary,
all this would go away.
That's what I'm afraid of. [sighs]
All of this would just go away.
["Dida" plays]
[protestors chanting] Free Linda now!
Free Linda now! Free Linda now!
[chanting continues]
A litany of Lindas.
Hello.
That's strange.
Free Linda now! Free Linda now!
Oh. Sorry.
Rita.
What in the heck is going on around here?
Isn't it obvious?
No, not to me.
All I see is a bunch of bad wigs
and corduroy and…
If they can do this to Linda,
they can do it to any of us.
We're all Linda now.
- [exhales deeply]
- [door opens]
- Hey, Kevin.
- [grunts]
[gasps] Maxine!
[gasps] Oh!
I can't believe it.
Oh, thank God one of us is free.
- Oh, honey. [sighs]
- [sighs]
- Thanks, Kevin.
- All right, then.
Sweet.
He's so nice.
He lingers. Yeah.
[chuckles]
[sighs] Oh, dear.
Oh, Linda. I cannot believe
that you have been framed.
It is awful.
It is palpably, inconceivably awful.
All the great martyrs of the world
have been framed.
Think of it. Joan of Arc, Galileo,
Jesus himself.
- Oh.
- I'm not comparing, obviously.
Just saying it's okay.
Do you need anything?
Clean clothes? Moisturizer?
The revolution
will not be moisturized, Maxine.
I would argue that a good skincare regime
can cross
all political divides. [chuckles]
You hear that?
[protestors chanting]
Hear that sound?
That sound
is the sound of centuries of oppression
rising up in a single voice to say,
"We know injustice when we see it."
- [chanting stops]
- Tha…
And… [stammers] Well, it's dying down.
- Oh.
- But… Well, I can't really hear them now.
Did they… Did they go on a lunch break?
Maybe they're just having a little snack.
[Linda] But… [sighs]
- Oh. There it is.
- [protestors continue chanting]
See? It's-It's all… it's all working out.
Oh, Linda.
Stop worrying, okay?
I-I'm gonna get you out of here
if it's the last thing I do.
But you know,
there's a lot of press out there.
- And that's good.
- Mm-hmm.
Oh, and Kevin told me
that Joan Baez is coming to sing later,
which is pretty groovy.
I'm not familiar, but that's wonderful.
- You'll see.
- Hmm.
And they'll see what one small voice
from a padded cell
next to a morgue in the basement
of an insane asylum can do.
[sighs] Wow.
Bravo, Linda.
- See? [chuckles]
- That was beautiful.
I just wanna make sure
that you fully fathom
the fact that you have pled guilty
to trying to kill
the president of these United States.
[sighs]
Maxine, they're gonna kill me, right?
[gasps] God. Oh, my God.
They're gonna use the electric chair.
And that just feels so not me.
- [inhales deeply]
- No. Don't you worry.
I'm gonna find that fugitive,
Mary Davidsoul, and exonerate you.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm gonna die.
[sighs] Just leave
every little tiny thing to me.
I'm listening.
The Rolodex.
[Linda] Not Norma's Rolodex.
- I burned that.
- No, no. I kn… I know you burned it.
But I also know you've got all that dirt
on all those high-level
government officials locked up here.
Write it down.
Look, if we don't produce Mary
in the next 24 hours,
we'll-we'll threaten to release this
little dossier to the press.
[sighs, stammers]
Yeah, all those government officials.
About to get you out of here.
So, they're trying to frame me,
and we'll frame them right back?
- Exactly. Oh!
- [gasps] Maxine, you're a genius.
- [gasps]
- [sighs] Get to writing.
Okay, okay.
You're right.
I can never forget some of this.
[protestors continue chanting]
- Him?
- Mm-hmm.
[gasps] Oh, my.
Shiny Sheet, please hold.
How can I help you?
I would like to take out
a full-page advertisement in the paper,
offering $75,000 to anyone
who has information
leading to the capture
of fugitive Mary Davidsoul.
No questions asked.
Don't waste your money, Maxine.
Mary's long gone.
Evelyn, what in blazes?
I am here to demand
an immediate retraction
of this scandalous so-called "blind item."
"Guess which long-in-the-tooth
recently widowed socialite
was seen out and about
with her boy-toy tennis pro"?
[gasps] That's her.
- That's you.
- Ding, ding, ding-a-ling.
I'm gonna need a full retraction
of this salacious claptrap.
You're welcome to wait for
Miss Holiday. She should be in shortly.
Absolutely not. I have to be
at City Hall at 3:00 on the dot.
- Let me see what I can do.
- Thank you.
What about my advertisement?
[stammers] That was $75,000.
That's an awful lot of cash, Maxine.
How are you planning to get your hands
on that kind of money?
Uh, well, as of 12:00 noon today,
uh, Linda has made me the official
conservator of the Rollins estate.
[chuckles]
You're the conservator of me?
Well… you're the conservator of me.
But, like, yes,
I'm in charge of the money.
But you're in charge of me.
So you're in charge of your money.
It's just through me.
Oh, no.
[screams] Fuck!
I will never do anything nice
for anyone ever again.
I-I don't think that's the lesson
you should take away from this.
As your conservator, Maxine,
I advise you to zip it.
Off to City Hall, huh?
What for? Jury duty?
Traffic court?
I must say, this silent treatment is
making my antenna go straight to Jupiter.
You should know.
But the thing is…
rich people don't pay
their traffic tickets.
And they certainly
don't do their civic duty.
In fact, they stay clear
of City Hall unless…
[gasps]
- You're getting married. [gasps]
- [scoffs] Don't be ridiculous.
You are wearing emeralds
before 5:00 p.m., ma'am.
I do not have bricks for brains.
Kudos, Sherlock. Yes, I'm getting married.
- [exclaims]
- Are you happy?
Evelyn, am I happy?
Oh, congratulations. Oh.
It's Eddie, right? Just confirming?
Simmer, poppet.
This is a marriage of convenience.
- It's purely transactional.
- [gasps]
He needs a green card,
and I'm feeling verdant.
Yeah? What do you say
I open the Rollins checkbook,
and you and I go to Ceil's?
Of all the sugar daddies in the world,
I get stuck with you.
Not too pink?
[Maxine] Oh.
You look like a piece of cake.
It's the shade that announces,
"Ladies and gentlemen,
curtain up on my second act."
- Wow, it's so romantic.
- Ooh.
[sighs] Even though I find myself
engulfed in a murderous rage,
I still believe in love.
Ladies, you must excuse me for a minute.
I have to assist with a delicate fitting.
A client who's mourning her fiancé
while still wishing to remain attractive
to her husband.
- I think I know who that is.
- Oh.
[Maxine] Hmm. Hmm.
Congratulations.
If it isn't the black widow herself.
I had nothing to do
with the death of my fiancé.
He was 91.
Well, people talk.
Not me, of course. But I do listen.
Grayman, may the widow have the perch?
[Grayman] Perch.
Oh, Grayman,
Maxine will also need the divorcée
trousseau for her upcoming exile.
Not a moment too soon.
Hmm. Fetch the black Givenchy hooded cape.
Ooh. Like Winky von Trapp wore
after her 5150.
Perch.
[scoffs]
Well, you can shut your von Trapp.
And there'll be no hood covering my hive.
In these bleak times, I… I lean on color.
[Grayman] Very well.
Granted, Douglas and I have
gone through a bit of a rough patch.
But I can assure you no matter what,
he… he still loves me.
[Evelyn] It's not about love.
It's business.
The fabled
Dellacorte Generation-Skipping Trust.
What?
Evelyn Rollins.
I'm here for my marriage license.
See, Norma thought Doug and Penelope
would pop a bun out of the oven
and all that money would start to flow.
But then Douglas ran off and married you,
and, of course,
you turned out to be more barren…
- [Maxine sighs]
- …than the Arctic Steppe.
[stammers] That's it.
That's why Norma hates me.
It's not because of the baby.
It's because of the money.
- [bell dings]
- Widow Rosenhips.
Here to pick up the death certificate.
- Did Douglas know about this trust?
- [gasps]
Do you think Norma would trust dum-dum
after he ran off
with Miss Pigeon Forge here?
She disowned him.
Thank God Maxine came back to Palm Beach
and introduced Doug to Mitzi.
Otherwise that money
might have stayed there forever.
Now it's back in play.
Oh. Most would see that as cold comfort.
Evelyn, how much money are we talking?
In round numbers?
Well, let's see.
It was hovering around the low 70s
when Doug and Penelope were together.
Compounded with interest over time…
I'd say, my best guess,
it sits around 80 now.
- Ooh.
- Wow, 80,000 smackers.
That's nothing to sneeze at.
[laughs] That would be 80 million.
Mill… Million?
As in million?
[sighs]
Uh… meet up with you ladies later.
[dramatic jazz music plays]
[bell dinging]
Do you have all kinds of paperwork here?
[bell dings]
[bird squawking]
[Maxine] Since when
do you have a seaplane?
Maxine.
You're out.
Oh, yes. Yes. I'm out. I'm very much out.
Do you care to explain?
Did-Did you get the days wrong?
Huh? The time?
Did your calendar catch on fire?
Maxine, I'm so sorry.
[stammers] I was…
I was planning on picking you up.
Of course I was.
In what? Five years? Ten years?
What were you gonna do, Douglas?
Just leave me rotting in there
like Dominique de Marché?
Look, I know that I make you crazy.
[Maxine] Well, Douglas, that is true.
So I am about to do the craziest thing
I've ever done.
Divorce papers.
I had a county clerk write them up.
Consider yourself served.
You're asking me for a divorce?
All this time you have
gotten your power from me.
And I didn't see it, but now I do.
And I'm gonna take that power,
and I'm gonna shove it
right back inside myself.
Oh, Maxine, this is very ill-timed.
Now that Norma's out of her stupor
and we can't use the house
for the club anymore,
Pinky's got me running back and forth,
taking cigars to Cuba.
I gotta do another run tonight.
Good news is I think
your business troubles are gonna work out.
You see, I have on good authority,
you're back in Norma's will.
That's everything.
The-The house contents, buckets of cash.
And I also have it
on even better authority that,
once your child is born,
there'll be even more buckets of cash.
So here's what's gonna happen.
I'm gonna divorce you.
And you're gonna marry Mitzi.
And she's gonna have that baby.
And you are gonna give me
half of every bucket that you have.
You don't really want me to marry Mitzi.
You know what's funny?
All day all I wanted to do was kill you.
And now all I wanna do is punish you.
For everything you've done.
For knocking up my friend.
[breathes shakily]
[officiant] Dearly beloved,
we are gathered here today,
not just to bear witness to the union
of two souls in a perfect alignment,
but to celebrate love
in all of its irregular forms.
Love is a commitment…
Ann, I'm so happy you're here.
[gasps] Look at her.
She's positively dewy.
- [Ann chuckles] Glowing.
- It's like she's lit from within.
[officiant] Do you, Evelyn Marie Rollins,
take this man, Eduardo Miguel Martinez,
to be your lawfully wedded husband?
To have and to hold, in sickness
and in health, till death do you part?
Yes, I do. Yes, yes, I do.
And do you, Eduardo Miguel Martinez,
take this woman, Evelyn Marie Rollins,
to be your lawfully wedded wife?
To have and to hold, in sickness
and in health, till death do you part?
Of course I do.
[officiant] As you embark
on this journey together…
[Maxine] They look so happy.
Reminds me of when
Douglas and I got married.
We were so in love.
That was before
I wanted to drive a railroad spike
through his still-beating heart.
- [sighs]
- [officiant] By the power vested in me,
- I pronounce you man and wife.
- [chuckles]
You may kiss the bride.
- [breathing heavily]
- [guests applauding]
[romantic music plays]
- That's a little X-rated. [chuckles]
- [laughs]
Oh, any word on Mary?
- Not a peep.
- [sighs]
She's probably halfway to Bolivia by now.
Well, if they haven't found her
in the next 24 hours, I got a plan B.
What's plan B?
Just a little thing that's gonna
blow the roof off the…
Dissolution of marriage?
- [attendees murmuring]
- [Maxine exhales]
Oh, sorry, no, not yours.
- Maxine.
- Oh, Ann. [stammers]
If I did what I think I just did,
I-I've given my soon-to be ex-husband
some information that will…
Well, it's gonna put Linda
in even more danger.
We can call law enforcement.
No. No, I don't wanna involve
those scoundrels.
We might know a non-scoundrel.
- No way, José.
- [Maxine huffs]
I've already been humiliated
down to desk duty.
And that FBI Ken doll
has everyone convinced
that Linda is the one who fired the gun.
They won't even put
any resources towards Mary.
Oh. But this is Linda
that we're talking about.
You have to help her.
Hey, it is your duty.
Don't tell me what my duty is.
And Linda don't want my help.
She won't even talk to me.
I have very deep pockets
courtesy of the Rollins estate,
and I'm happy to empty them
in your direction.
Are you trying to bribe me?
Don't be silly, of course I am.
So you wanna add dirty Palm Beach money
on top of everything
I'm already in trouble for?
Oh, it's not dirty. It's clean.
Made off the backs of hardworking
railway laborers working out there
- in the hot sun…
- Please stop talking.
Deputize me.
Deputize me.
Nobody knows the mean streets
of Palm Beach better than Ann Holiday.
It's true.
This ain't Mayberry, Ann.
This place is a lot darker
than you two could know.
[mouthing word] Please.
[sighs] Fine, I'll do one more sweep
of the crime scene,
but you need to get that paper back
from your no-count husband.
Yeah.
You know he's not the sharpest tack
in the drawer.
Well, Douglas may not be book smart,
but he's street smart. [chuckles]
What street?
Idiot Avenue?
Comedian.
[Douglas] Maxine served me divorce papers.
Oh, I didn't think the old gal
had it in her.
Neither did I.
[Perry] Hmm.
Now, I do know a real barracuda
who'll have Maxine living in a box
under an overpass
when all's said and done.
No, Perry, nothing like that.
I… I-I know what people say about me,
that I'm a terrible person.
Take the card.
Okay. Here.
You want me to take a look?
[Douglas] Yeah. Y-You mind if I?
[Perry] No. Have at.
[Perry hums]
[stammers]
Uh, wow, this is bad.
I couldn't even make myself look at it.
I just… [stammers] …I couldn't take it.
Let me pass this along
to the barracuda, huh?
Okay. Thanks, Perry.
Yeah.
[grunts]
- [Evelyn] Mary, every branch…
- [exhales sharply]
…of law enforcement is looking for you.
I'm a wanted woman in more ways than one.
- I have taken a lover.
- Oh, my God.
Oh, not a corporeal one, of course.
A ghost lover.
It's the ghost of a bootlegger.
For a dead man, he is very virile.
[car door closes]
Mary, get back in there
and lay off the sauce.
Evelyn.
Has Douglas called?
I've been leaving messages for him
all over town.
This is pathetic.
You served Douglas his papers, right?
There might have
been a weensy hink in the process.
So I gotta stay by the phone
in case he calls.
- [Evelyn] Uh…
- [Eduardo] You ready to go?
- [Maxine chuckles] Oh.
- Hey.
Uh, maybe we shouldn't go out tonight.
Are you ashamed to be seen with me?
Oh, n… Oh, no, it's not you, it's-it's…
Maxine.
If you would afford me and my new husband
some privacy on our wedding night.
Who am I to stand in the way of new love?
As of tonight,
I won't be a bother to anyone.
Promise.
Let's go to dinner, darling.
[chuckles] Where are you going?
- [Evelyn] The club.
- Oh…
[Eduardo sighs]
- Don't be here when I get back.
- All right.
[sighs]
Please call.
Please call.
[sighs]
[clattering]
[mysterious music plays]
[breathes shakily] Is someone there?
- [Mary] No.
- [gasps]
[exhales sharply] Mary!
- [Mary] Squawk.
- [grunts] Mary Davidsoul!
You un-portraitize yourself this instant!
[breathing heavily]
[gasps]
[exhales sharply]
[intriguing music plays]
[exhales sharply]
What the heck is this place?
Mary, Mary, listen, please.
This is not a game.
You have to come out,
and you have to save Linda.
- [sighs] No, Mary!
- You'll never catch me alive.
[grunts, pants]
[pants] Mary!
[panting]
Mary?
[grunts]
[exhales sharply] Mary.
Wait!
- Mary!
- [mechanical whirring]
Mary!
[whimpers]
[breathing heavily]
The Rollins connects to the Palm Royale?
[gasps]
[mysterious music plays]
The disgraced socialites' apartment.
[door opens]
[dumbwaiter door closes]
[sniffing]
Jungle Gardenia.
[Maxine] Mary!
Mary! [pants]
[grunts]
[gasps] What?
[grunts, breathes heavily]
It's like a poem.
All roads lead to the Dellacorte. [sighs]
Maxine, why are you in the floor?
Douglas.
Oh. Oh, just the man at just the time.
Listen, I…
I need those divorce papers back.
First you ask me for… [stammers]
…no, tell me that we're getting a divorce.
Two hours later,
you pop through the floor to take it back.
- Maxine, you're giving me whiplash here.
- No, no, no. No, no.
[stammers] It's not what it seems.
Uh, I still want a divorce.
Then I want my engagement ring back.
This is my ring.
You-You plighted your troth with it.
[Douglas] Before I plighted with you,
I used it to troth with P…
[stammers] …Linda.
[sighs]
[Maxine whispers] Jesus Christ.
Where are you going?
Well, as long as I'm here,
I'm gathering my things.
Maxine.
Maxine.
Why are my beloved belongings
in a heap on the floor?
Norma's moving back in here.
She just wanted to clear space
in the closet.
[sighs] Max, that was my mother's ring.
It's all I have left of her.
And I-I need it for Mitzi.
You're proposing.
You told me to.
Will you be kneeling?
'Cause, uh, don't want you to forget you
got that little catch in your left knee.
Wouldn't want you to embarrass yourself
on such an important moment
in your young lives.
You know,
when you're telling your children,
you don't wanna have to say,
"Daddy's bum knee got locked up
when he was proposing to Mommy
and he had to roll over on his side
to get up on his feet again."
My children?
Wow. I never even thought past this one.
Sure… [chuckles] …why stop at one?
You've always wanted a big family,
lots of kids.
Something I couldn't give you.
Mitzi can.
[melancholy music plays]
I'm not surprised
you have feelings for her.
Is it so terrible for me to have feelings
for the mother of my child?
That is allowed.
Yes.
Yes, that's allowed.
You said to marry her,
have the baby, and get the money.
That's what you said you wanted.
Well, is it what Mitzi wants?
Have you even asked her?
You just assume this young,
beautiful woman
with her whole life ahead of her wants
to just throw her future away for you?
That never even crossed your mind, did it?
[scoffs] Poor Douglas.
You still think you're the prize,
don't you?
Well, I guess that's my fault.
I just want things to be simple.
Don't say simple
like it's something to go back to.
Things were never simple.
I just made you feel like they were.
[Douglas]
You can leave out the front door.
[Maxine] The hole in the floor
will do me just fine.
Can I have my ring, please?
[exhales sharply]
You give me my divorce papers,
and I will give you back your godforsaken,
third-time-is-probably-not-a-charm ring.
I don't have the papers anymore.
I gave them to Perry.
Oh, God. They couldn't be in worse hands.
- The ring. Please.
- Oh, screw your mother's ring!
And screw the Dellacortes!
[sobbing]
[dramatic music plays]
[music ends]
["Sugar Town" plays]
Auntie Norma,
do you think Douglas likes me?
Hmm. Do you like him?
I don't know him, if I'm being honest.
With Douglas, you can write your ticket
without any of those pesky feelings.
You are that rare and lucky woman
whose marriage will never be a prison
but a ticket to freedom.
With Maxine, I can't shake the feeling
that I've betrayed something unspoken.
I want to be the kind of woman
who helps other women,
like you or Evelyn Rollins.
[laughs]
Evelyn Rollins helps only herself.
Maxine is free.
What?
She is?
She went to that terrible place
because I did something terrible,
but Evelyn Rollins saved her.
[ominous music plays]
[Mitzi, muffled] That's the kind of
heroism the world needs more of, isn't it?
- Norma.
- Doug.
- Mitzi.
- Doug.
Mitzi, I need to know,
do you want any of this?
This life? Our family? Me?
I guess it would be a real powerful
maybe.
Maybe even a yes.
[chuckles]
[Douglas] Mitzi…
[Dinah] I'm off
to retrieve Axel for cremation,
and after, meet for drinks at the club?
[screams] Perry! Put that down.
Don't you dare make me
a double black widow.
Dougie gave me
an envelope filled with intel
that could have screwed Nixon's pooch.
I did what any patriot would.
I-I passed it along
to that Secret Service guy, Clune. [sighs]
Why in heavens?
[ominous jazz music plays]
I wanted to be back in the mix, babe.
I wanted to be somebody worth something
to the someones who really matter.
Before I knew it, he gives me this.
Tells me to Jack Ruby Linda.
Jack Ruby? Of the Penobscot Rubys?
No, the guy who… who shot
Lee Harvey Oswald so he wouldn't talk.
- But why you?
- I'm the perfect patsy.
They want me to shoot Linda
when they're moving her
from the psych ward to the federal pen,
and then once I've offed her,
they're gonna disappear us.
Most likely to a tract home in Scranton.
[whimpers]
I'm not changing my name again
to live amidst the Mennonites
after pulling off the biggest
monetary coup in Palm Beach history.
- [sighs]
- Dinah.
Dinah.
Dinah. Who are you calling?
[phone ringing]
[grunting]
- [ringing continues]
- [breathing heavily]
Rollins-Martinez mansion. Maxine speaking.
Maxine. [breathes heavily]
We have a Linda problem.
[protestors chanting]
Free Linda now! Free Linda now!
Linda!
[Linda] Please tell me you've found Mary.
Well, while I was, uh, asserting myself
in a way that I think
would've made you proud,
I sort of accidentally gave
our insurance policy to Douglas,
who accidentally gave it to Perry,
who purposefully gave it to Nixon,
who told Perry to shoot you.
- [gasps]
- [sighs]
First, let me say
it's really nice that you were able
to take control of your own narrative
in your way…
- Oh.
- …and for that I am proud of you.
And now
I am going to die.
Maxine! [sobbing]
No, sirree, ma'am.
I'm getting you outta here.
You've become
quite the hero on the outside.
[chuckles]
Wouldn't be surprised if they put you
on the front of a cereal box.
Tom, I need you to tell me.
[sighs] How did Axel Rosenhips die?
At a cocktail party
honoring his engagement.
Ninety years old
and drinking to the future.
Was this at Norma's?
Yeah.
Have you checked his blood?
For insulin?
Why would I?
[breathes heavily]
I need to talk to Norma, please.
Then it's a good thing
you're heading home.
It might be a while
before we're alone again.
- [Maxine] Robert?
- [door opens]
[Tom gasps]
- [door closes]
- I need you.
You.
I hope you are not
telling this man a single thing.
He will twist it, and turn it,
and flip it on its side.
I feel terrible about
what's happening with Linda. I do.
They took my interrogation
and misrepresented what she actually said.
Cry me a river. You have done your worst.
Now if you please,
I would need a moment here with my friend.
Check in on you later.
[door opens]
- [door closes]
- That guy loves a slow exit.
- Hmm.
- Listen, the joke's on him because
- we're gonna bust Linda out.
- Maxine…
The only thing I need help with is
I need a wounded fake astronaut.
Shoot. Do you know any?
Well, let's say
Mary ducked out of the back of the tent
while the hoi polloi went back
to the Dellacorte mansion.
Well, they had cops here within minutes.
They would have seen her.
Maybe she swam to Cuba.
Unlikely with
her degenerative anaphylaxis.
You really know these ladies.
Oh, I know everything about them,
but I'm only invited to the parties
to write about them.
I'd never be able to
join the club.
You're Jewish.
Well done, Special Agent Lyons.
I hope you don't mind me asking,
but why would you join the FBI?
[Virginia]
I was recruited out of Florida A&M.
I thought if I could just
get on the inside,
maybe I could protect my community.
But then Dr. King got shot.
Fred Hampton.
[suspenseful music plays]
And I thought, "Fuck it."
You want me to keep an eye on subversives?
I'ma take out the real villains.
Well, for what it's worth,
you made a very believable mole.
Wait. [chuckles]
I know where Mary went.
Bootleggers smuggled rum from Cuba
during Prohibition.
They built tunnels all under Palm Beach
to the houses, to the clubs.
I thought they'd all been boarded up.
- I could kiss you.
- [chuckles]
Oh, how very FBI.
Oh, Axel.
May I have a moment alone?
Oh, thank you.
Hello.
- Sorry for your loss.
- Thank you so much.
- ["Pusherman" plays]
- [elevator bell dings]
I'm your mama
I'm your daddy ♪
I'm that mugger in the alley ♪
I'm your doctor
When in need ♪
Want some coke?
Have some weed ♪
You know me
I'm your friend ♪
Your main boy
Thick and thin ♪
I'm your pusherman ♪
All right, ladies, make it quick.
- [chuckles]
- Maxine says you're gonna be moved.
[elevator bell dings]
[music continues]
[Perry sighs]
This is crazy. I'm just gonna
stay here and take my chances.
Do you hear yourself? Come on.
Let the sisterhood envelop you.
Say goodbye.
[Linda sighs] Oh.
Ain't I clean? Bad machine ♪
Super cool, super mean ♪
Dealin' good, for The Man ♪
Uh, sorry, ladies, time's up.
Come on.
Bye, Linda.
We got you, babe.
- [Rita] Stay true.
- [Dinah] Hold the door.
I'm your pusherman ♪
I'm your pusherman ♪
[door locks]
[Agent Clune] It's go time.
Don't let your president down.
Time to go, Pinko Princess.
What the fuck?
It's a dead guy in a wig.
- Where the hell is she?
- Let's take the stairs.
[elevator bell dings]
Move, Lindas, move.
Get the lead out, sisters.
Come on.
[Agent Stevens] Stop them!
- [Linda, muffled] Are we there yet?
- Shut up! You're dead!
- Hey!
- [yelps]
[pants]
[Dinah] For God's sakes, man!
Can't a woman cremate
her fiancé's body in peace?
Sorry for your loss.
I didn't kill him!
[squeals] Make room for the dead.
[exclaims] Beautiful day.
Wanna give her
Somethin' better than me ♪
Been told I can't be nothin' else ♪
Hold that ambulance!
No, no, please, please. No, no, no. No.
[sighs, panting]
[Linda] Are we there yet?
[sighing]
- More deliveries for you.
- [Robert] Wow.
[grunting]
[Norma] Are there many in your family,
or should we look to the social register
to fill out the bridal party?
[Mitzi] My family might need
a little more training
before we introduce them to the gang.
[Linda] Gin Rickey?
[Robert chuckles] Hey.
[chuckles] Ouch.
What are you wearing? [chuckles]
It's a disguise
from the back of Dinah's closet.
[Norma] You are going to be
the richest woman in Palm Beach.
It's time you act like a queen,
not some lowly worm
crawling along the ground.
[Mitzi] I don't wanna be a worm.
I just wish a queen could have friends.
[Norma] Friendship is overrated.
We'll tap Dinah Donahue for help.
[scoffs] She'll be all too eager
to lick the heels of the ascendant.
[Linda] I have to go.
I hope you know how devastated I was
that you got shot.
[chuckles] I am sorry
my friend framed you.
[chuckles]
He's a friend of yours?
I don't know what he is yet.
Oh, maybe you guys will make a go of it.
He'll be back soon.
When the world calms down.
- I hope the world calms down.
- [footsteps approaching]
[door opens]
[sighs] There you are. Come on, let's go.
We gotta get in the hole.
And might I say, you look amazing.
Hey, come on, let's go.
If only you weren't one of a kind.
- [Maxine] Let's go.
- Go be free.
If I'm not mistaken,
the beach is this way.
[sighs] Just get us out of here, Maxine.
- These tunnels are crawling with rats.
- I know, I know. [sighs]
[both scream]
- Mary, stop right there!
- Mary…
Well, I think
we're looking at a rat right now,
and her name is Fugitive Davidsoul.
I am officially placing you
under citizen's arrest.
On what charge?
- [gasps]
- On letting Linda rot in jail
for a crime you alone committed!
- I had no idea.
- Don't give me that.
It was all over the TV.
How lovely to be known.
And though some have called fame a burden,
would the very same trade it?
I think not.
None of this is lovely.
Evelyn said I had to stay in my hole,
and so I did.
And you know how hard it is
to say no to her.
Evelyn helped hide you
and didn't come save me?
Oh, fine, I'll confess.
It's too late. I'm a dead woman.
No, no, no, not if we keep moving.
Let's go to the beach.
Mary, you're our prisoner.
Let's go. March!
[Mary] Uh, if I may…
- Oh. Beach is this way.
- Okay.
- Oh, oh, here's your purse.
- [Maxine] Oh, thank you.
How do you know so much
about these tunnels anyway?
[Mary chuckles] Well, once I was lost,
but then I was found
by the ghost of a sexy bootlegger.
Sexy bootlegger?
- Uh, I'm stuck on ghost.
- Oh, yeah.
He's dead, but he is still quite virile.
Oh, Linda, I feel awful…
Stop where you are!
Oh, Virginia.
- I really should be going.
- Wait…
Not another inch, Mary.
Linda, how the hell you get out?
And what are you wearing?
I broke her out, and I found Mary,
so you're welcome.
And it's Marabou.
Well, I'm arresting
every single one of you entitled dingbats!
- Up against the wall!
- What?
[Virginia] Spread 'em!
- [Maxine] But…
- Now!
Look, we know you're FBI,
but we also know that you're one of us.
Just… [sighs] Uh…
That woman who called me a vapid poon,
she was real,
and I think she truly loved
and believed in the sisterhood.
And even if Mary gets caught
and goes to jail,
Linda is still a marked woman.
You once asked if we were friends.
And I said we were
on the same side of history.
But we were.
We are friends, Linda.
Virginia, can I hug you?
- Yes. But don't get too close to my gun.
- Oh. Okay, understood.
Aw.
And if I go down for this, I'm taking
every single one of y'all with me.
You got that, Edward R. Murrow?
This entire escape is off the record.
Come on, ladies. Let's join this hug.
- [giggling]
- [Virginia] Watch the gun.
[Maxine] Aw.
- Get in here.
- [giggling]
[Mary] And who is Edward R. Murrow?
It's that white man that be on the news.
["Across 110th Street" plays]
I was the third brother of five ♪
Doing whatever I had to do to survive ♪
I'm not saying
What I did was all right ♪
Trying to break out of the ghetto
Was a day-to-day fight ♪
Across 110th Street ♪
- [Linda] Where are we going?
- [Maxine] To the docks.
Oh, oh, oh ♪
Whoo, ooh, oh ♪
What now?
Uh… Now, uh, we wait.
[music fades]
- [Linda] So what are we waiting for?
- [Maxine shushes]
Everyone just… [shushes, sighs]
Hold on.
We are not waiting on
- Douglas. [gasps]
- Douglas.
- Maxine.
- Oh, my God.
Yes, we are waiting on Douglas.
When has that man ever come through
or shown up for anybody in his life?
- [Virginia] What did you do?
- [Ann] This is serious shit.
- [Linda] What the fuck?
- Ladies.
[pants] What can one count on
if not the predictability of men?
[tense music plays]
[airplane engine whirring]
Oh. Oh, thank heavens.
Oh, it's him. It's Douglas. It's Douglas!
[chuckles] It's Douglas!
[laughs]
Douglas!
It's him. I knew it. I knew it!
Douglas!
[giggles]
[triumphant music plays]
[grunts]
[Douglas] What the hell is happening here?
[Maxine] Uh…
We broke Linda out of prison,
and we need you to fly her to safety.
To Cuba.
No. That is categorically not happening.
[sighs]
[Maxine] Yes, it is.
Douglas, I've done
so much for you, please.
You've gotta do something for me.
- Please.
- [groans]
I asked Mitzi to marry me,
and she said yes.
But you being here
is just too hard for me, Maxine.
So, if I fly Penelope out of the country,
you need to leave Palm Beach as well.
Exiled.
Evelyn was right. [chuckles]
The only way forward is
through Baden-Baden and a Tuscan tomato.
What? Do we have an understanding or not?
Yes, we do.
But I'm not doing this for you.
I'm doing it for Linda.
Okay. [inhales]
You ready?
- I'm gonna miss you, Maxine.
- [clicks tongue, sighs]
[Maxine] Oh, Linda.
You know what?
We're gonna find each other again.
As free women.
[chuckles]
Hey.
You see this woman here?
She's the best thing
that ever happened to you.
[sighs]
Or me.
Penelope, get in the goddamn cargo hold.
[clicks tongue, sighs]
Careful.
[airplane engine whirring]
[melancholy music plays]
I guess this is goodbye.
[Maxine grunting]
[panting, sighs]
Hello, ladies.
Fancy meeting you here.
Winky von Trapp?
I'd recognize that hood anywhere.
Suppose I should introduce myself.
I'm Maxine.
When I joined the club, I didn't realize
there was a much more exclusive club.
I'm honored.
Lots of bows and hats, I see. [chuckles]
"Stella…
Stella Rue Dellacorte Simmons"?
That's Douglas's mother.
What the heck are you doing here?
You shouldn't have gone to the trouble.
[Norma chuckles] Nonsense.
You took care of me.
Now, I'll take care of you.
[Robert grunts]
I know what happened to Axel.
It's all over, Agnes.
[ominous music plays]
[sighs] Yes, dear.
It is.
[suspenseful music plays]