Peacemaker (2022) s02e02 Episode Script

1
(TELEPHONES RINGING)
- (KEYPAD BEEPING) - JOHN ECONOMOS:
So, obviously, that's the bathroom.
And the break room is down there
on the right, obviously.
- Um, what else? - REPORTER: (ON TV)
Amanda Waller will step aside
- as she faces upcoming congressional hearings.
- Oh, check it out. You're on TV.
REPORTER: The president
has appointed Rick Flag
as the new acting director
of ARGUS
- (SCOFFS)
- (REPORTER SPEAKING ON TV)
What?
That's not exciting to you?
I know Waller was all
about self-promotion,
but that's not really my bag.
Yeah, A-Dubs did have
her quirks.
- What?
- Dubs.
- W. Amanda Waller.
- Yeah.
You know,
this post wasn't my choice,
but I'm not sure the president
had any other options, so
My old pal Rick Flag.
- We're old pals now?
- Thought we were.
Are you sucking up to me
right now, Economos?
- Just a little.
- It's not gonna work.
Yeah, well, it was worth a shot.
And this is your office.
Uh, you need anything else?
- (DOOR CLOSING)
- Actually, yes.
I'd like to see a full report
of my son's death.
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Your son?
- Rick Flag Jr. was killed
in Corto Maltese.
I tried to get the files
immediately after it occurred,
but they said it was classified.
As acting director of ARGUS,
I'd like to take a look
at them now.
Is there a problem
with that, son?
No. I it's just
I didn't want, you know,
- it to be upsetting?
- Upsetting?
I think I can handle it,
Economos.
Of cour Of course, you can.
It's just that day
was complicated
and any actions taken
were under the order of Waller,
and most of us didn't even know.
Get me the fucking files, John.
Yes, sir.
(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(EXHALES SOFTLY)
I'm tired of coverin' up
their dirty little secrets.
This time, these sons of bitches
are gonna be held account
That information gets out,
it causes
an international incident!
Keeping the peace is worth
any price.
Including the life
of a hero like yours, sir.
- (GRUNTS)
- (GROANS)
- (METAL CLANGING)
- (GROANS)
(PEACEMAKER GROANS)
(HEARTBEAT POUNDING)
(MUSIC SWELLING) ♪
(HEARTBEAT FADING)
RICK FLAG JUNIOR:
Peacemaker. What a joke.
(TENSE MUSIC OVERLAPPING) ♪
- (YELLS)
- (MUSIC FADES) ♪
- Bordeaux.
- Sir?
I want a surveillance unit
on Christopher Smith,
24/7, immediately.
Sir, the Peacemaker is
in our agency's grace
because of his work
in Project Butterfly.
Fuck the Peacemaker.
("OH LORD"
BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING) ♪
Julian, it's a hungry world ♪
They're gonna eat you alive
Son, yeah ♪
Oh, Julian
When their fangs sink in ♪
I'll stitch you, but then ♪
I gotta throw you
Back in, oh ♪
You just try and sleep
Even though you're alone ♪
You just close your eyes boy
And dream of home ♪
And light is always on
You just keep that in mind ♪
When you wake in the morning
You'll be satisfied ♪
'Cause there is always
A wrong to your right ♪
And there will always be
A war somewhere to fight ♪
And God knows I've had
Some rough fucking years ♪
Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord ♪
Keep on keepin' on ♪
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
And God knows I've had
Some rough fuckin' years ♪
Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord ♪
Keep on keepin' on ♪
- (SQUAWKS)
- La, la, la, la, la, la ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la ♪
(SONG FADES OUT) ♪
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(OMINOUS MUSIC STING) ♪
- Oh, shit!
- (HELMET CLANGS)
(PEACEMAKER GASPS)
(MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
(GROANS) Fuck.
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
(PANTING)
(GROANS)
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS)
Fuck!
(YELLS)
(PANTING)
(DIAL TONE RINGING)
You still have those bone saws?
(TENSE MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(GRUNTING)
(SOBS)
(BARKING)
(GASPS) Hi, babies!
Yes! (LAUGHS) Aw!
Come here, come here.
Oh yes, I missed you.
Oh, Mommy's missed you guys.
Oh, ho, ho.
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(EXHALES HEAVILY)
(SNIFFLES, SIGHS)
(MUSIC FADES) ♪
- KEEYA ADEBAYO: Lee?
- Oh shit. Fuck.
What are you doing?
(SIGHS) I was on my way
over to Chris's,
so I thought I'd stop by
and get my hair shit
You can't just come
into this place unannounced.
- I thought you were at work.
- KEEYA: It doesn't matter.
You need to text me
before coming over.
LEOTA ADEBAYO: Why?
Because that's
what civilized people do
when they break up, Lee.
Thought it was just time off.
What's the difference?
A lot.
Okay. (EXHALES)
I'm sorry.
Why are you going
to see that lunkhead anyway?
He ain't a lunkhead.
He's, like, being really
vulnerable lately.
Sexy new uniform.
You doing okay otherwise?
Other than what?
Other than having to wear
that uniform, I guess.
That's funny?
Man, you just
you're salty for no reason.
- Oh, for no reason?
- I mean.
No reason?
Okay, other than you changing
every single aspect
of our relationship,
every single plan
that we had, overnight?
We were supposed
to be going back to Gotham, Lee.
And now what?
You're staying here
to start a a a spy business?
People gotta follow
their dreams, Key.
- Even you said that.
- Yeah, not when their dreams
are leeching off
of somebody else's reality.
- LEOTA: I'll go
- (KEEYA SCOFFS)
because this is
gonna end stupid.
KEEYA: It started stupid
when you broke
into my apartment.
All right.
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
(PACKAGING RUSTLING)
Love you.
KEEYA: (MUTTERS) Fuck.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS) ♪
- (DOORBELL CHIMES)
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
PHARMACIST: Connolly,
your prescription's ready.
Hi. I'm
I'm sorry
I couldn't help notice you
when I was standing over there.
I don't mean to intrude,
and I don't know your situation,
but if you're going
through something difficult,
if you're with someone
who's hurting you,
I have resources
that could help.
Okay. Thanks.
SHOPPER: Yeah.
Often, we get trapped in a cycle
and we think
what's happening to us is okay.
Mm-hmm.
And I just want to tell you,
it's not.
I appreciate it.
That's not what this is.
(SOFTLY) Okay.
So often,
women deny what's happening
I am not a fucking mirror!
- What?
- I have my own problems, okay?
- SHOPPER: Okay.
- All right?
Is that okay with you?
Sorry.
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
You got a good view there,
Beaker?
Beaker? Who's
He's a Muppet.
- Do I look like him?
- A little.
- And that's bad?
- It's not good.
(MELLOW GUITAR
MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(SIGHS)
(DOORBELL CHIMES)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(DOOR HANDLE CLANGS)
(VAN DOORS RATTLING)
Whoa. That's intense.
Who the fuck are you?
Fleury. Bordeaux sent me.
Let me see your badge.
And reach slowly.
(CHUCKLES) I don't have
to do shit slowly, Kemosabe.
You can't discharge that firearm
while it's still in the holster.
But I will do it slowly
because I'm polite.
I should get a call
if somebody's coming.
- (GUN THUDS)
- (SIGHS)
Well, Bordeaux thought
you might need some backup.
- (VAN DOORS CLOSING)
- So, what's your preferred form of greeting?
Handshake, fist bump, hug?
You a hugger, Economos?
No, I'm not a hugger.
- So, what'll it be?
- What'll what be?
What form of greeting?
I don't know.
Maybe just nod, like
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, that's cool.
That's real cool.
Hey, we got a cool guy
in the van, huh? (CHUCKLES)
Ginger Cool.
You mind if I call you that?
Ginger Cool?
Yeah, I really do fucking mind.
(CHUCKLES)
Mm.
(POT THUDS)
(SNIFFS)
(SIGHS)
- (GROANS) Oh, God.
- (DOOR CLOSING)
Mm. Can I get some of that?
The coffee.
Sure.
(GROANS)
(PEACEMAKER SIGHS)
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
(POT THUDS)
LANGSTON FLEURY: Who's the fox?
ECONOMOS: It's Leota Adebayo.
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm!
She's just a friend of ours.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Did I just accidentally
sexualize someone
that you respect as a friend,
Economos?
It's fine. Whatever.
Well, it's just
'cause I was thinking about
tapping that ass
(CHUCKLES) you know?
It's weird they got you
monitoring your own crew.
They do that, you know.
I know.
Make sure your loyalty is first
and foremost to the A.
- ARGUS.
- (SOFTLY) Fuck.
You having a crisis
of conscience here, Economos?
No.
Is that why Bordeaux sent me
to babysit you?
I don't know, man. Look.
I'm just doing my job
like I do every day, okay?
- I don't give a shit.
- 'Course, not.
You're Ginger Cool.
Are you fucking kidding me?
- You don't want me to come in?
- It's, uh (SIGHS)
It's kind of messy in there.
What's going on?
(SOFT TAPS ON DOOR)
(CHIRPS)
Hey, Eagly.
- (SQUAWKS)
- Hey! (SCOFFS)
- He likes you.
- I'm not so sure.
FLEURY: What's the deal
with the parrot?
- That's an eagle.
- Hmm?
It's a bald eagle.
It's the symbol of America.
Are you telling me
you don't recognize
what kind of bird that is?
Okay, you obviously
have not read my dossier.
I have bird blindness.
(SCOFFS)
Bird blindness?
I can't tell the difference
between one type of bird
and another.
Okay, but a duck and an eagle
are totally different sizes.
Yeah, well, they look
the same size to me, man.
(SIGHS) What about,
like, a hummingbird?
Tiny bird?
Incredibly fast wings? Hovers?
ECONOMOS: Yeah, see?
Yeah, I only know
about that because I read it.
- ECONOMOS: Yeah.
- To me, they look and move
just like any other bird.
- Wow.
- FLEURY: Bird blindness.
It's my sole weakness.
(MONITOR BEEPING)
FLEURY: What is she showing him?
Um Oh, that's
That could be anything, man.
- LEOTA: Quantum what?
- PEACEMAKER: Unfolding Chamber.
It's a dimensional portal
that leads
to 99 other universes.
- In your bedroom?
- It's my dad's bedroom.
Yours now?
Yeah, fucking mine now,
whatever. (SIGHS)
I don't use it much.
I let Eagly fly around
there sometimes
when it's too cold outside.
- It's my dad's.
- You never told me about it.
Never thought about it, Ads.
Jeez, it's not that big a deal.
Get the fuck out, it's not.
I grew up with it.
It's normal to me.
It's like you being a fucking
Christian Scientist or whatever.
- I'm not Christian Science.
- What are you then?
Well, I don't practice much,
but I'm Methodist.
- Oh yeah?
- LEOTA: Yeah.
I don't know
what the fuck that is!
Okay? Normal to you, but to me,
it's wacky Martian shit.
You cannot seriously be
comparing me being Methodist
to you having
a secret dimensional portal
- in your bedroom right now.
- I see your point!
Fine.
Fucking congratulations, Ads.
You're the winner
of the conversation.
We'll get you your gold medal
and your congratulatory watch,
and, you know,
your fucking many awards
to shower you with.
Let's all get together
and do a big
fucking dance routine.
Yeah, that's right. Great.
Just 40,000 people
fucking dancing,
just about how
fucking awesome you are
at doing conversations!
Shit!
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
Are you having a breakdown
right now?
I don't know. (BREATHES HEAVILY)
What's going on with you?
I had a rough night.
I don't want to make it worse,
but you're being monitored
right now.
- By who?
- Rick Flag. Senior.
He's the head of ARGUS now.
(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Does he know that I, uh
- Killed his son? Yeah.
Fuck me.
Fuck. How do you know all this?
A friend inside.
I'm just gonna pretend
like I don't know who that is.
(MONITOR BEEPING)
(MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
- You want my advice?
- I don't fucking know.
Number one, this portal?
Don't use it because, somehow,
they always know when you do.
- Number two, give it to them.
- It's mine!
They're gonna treat you
like you're hiding
a nuclear weapon
in your house, Chris.
Just tell them you don't
know exactly what it is.
It's your dad's, or whatever.
Because if you don't,
they're going to use this
as an excuse
to send you back to prison.
Hey, guys.
Who's the nerd?
That is Adrian Chase.
They're, uh
He's just a friend.
(SCOFFS)
That motherfucker look like
he caught all the Pokémen.
- You know what I'm saying?
- No, I don't.
Super nerd.
Pokémon is plural, not Pokémen.
Well, I'm sorry.
Pokémen's grammar
is not my bag, man.
When, uh,
you were learning that,
I had two hot bitches
sucking my dick.
Mm.
Okay, well,
I'll see y'all guys tonight.
- John's coming home party.
- Yeah, we'll be there.
Eagly! (WHISTLES) Come on!
VIGILANTE:
So, what are we doing?
PEACEMAKER:
I need a hand with something.
What's all this?
- I had some people over, is all.
- (SCOFFS)
What?
Nothing.
- (TOILET FLUSHING)
- Oh!
- Hey.
- PEACEMAKER: Hey.
Uh, Zora.
Would you do me a huge favor?
Would you mind getting
these people out of here for me?
Sure.
Thank you. (CHUCKLES)
- Well, that's gross.
- What?
There was no time at all
between her flushing that toilet
and coming out of the bathroom.
That means she didn't
wash her hands at all.
- Okay.
- "Okay"? (SCOFFS)
Personally, I don't think
gonorrhea hands are "okay."
- What are you pissed off about?
- I'm not pissed off.
Fine, 'cause I don't
need it today, Adrian, okay?
Fine. Why am I here?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Dude, I fucked up.
Oh, I see. You're in trouble
and you call me.
But you have a party
and you fuck a bunch
of major hotties
and then you don't even
invite your best friend?
Why do you always pretend
like you're not pissed off
- when it's obvious?
- I'm not pissed off.
I didn't say I was pissed off.
Is it surprising? Yes.
Is it outrageous?
Absolutely, it is!
Yeah, I was depressed.
Okay? It was
a spur-of-the-moment thing.
I was just
drowning my sorrows in flesh.
It had nothing to do
with friendship.
And to be quite honest, Adrian,
you don't even
seem that into sex.
Dude, I'm not into sex
because, like, it's sex.
I'm into sex because,
like a lot of people,
it's an opportunity
to bond with my best friend.
That's not like a lot of people.
Well, I'm not a pervert,
is what I'm saying.
I don't quote-unquote
"like" sex.
Shut the door.
- (HINGES CREAKING)
- (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Are you going in?
- I'm being monitored.
- What?
- They're gonna know.
Know what?
- Fuck it.
- (KEYPAD BEEPING)
(LOCK CHIMES)
(RADAR BEEPING)
- Oh, fuck.
- Whoa.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Fleury. Yeah, we see it.
Yeah, me and Ginger Cool
are on this shit.
- Jesus Christ.
- FLEURY: Yeah, sure.
Bordeaux wants to know are you
going to that thing tonight?
- The thing with Smith?
- Yeah, I know what she means.
Yes. Why?
He says he'll be there
with bells on.
He said he'll be there
"with bells on"?
Well, I added the bells part.
Sounded more poetic.
Okay, Agent, don't do that.
Don't embellish shit.
Sorry, Chief.
It won't happen again.
Flag thinks
we should keep Economos
in the cold on this.
Okay.
SASHA BORDEAUX:
So, after he and Smith leave,
I'm sending you
and a team of agents
to do a full scrub
of Smith's home.
- Got it?
- FLEURY: Right.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
She says to hold.
- So, do nothing?
- That's right.
Okay.
(MUSIC FADES) ♪
So, then you killed
your own doppelganger?
- Yeah.
- From another dimension?
Yes.
That's exactly the same as ours,
except everything's better?
- Yep.
- Dude, that's sick!
- Believe me, it's not.
- But why?
I'd love to meet a me
that's me except better.
(SCOFFS) Dude, believe me,
you don't want to meet yourself.
It's chilling as fuck.
Well, yeah, sure,
if you kill yourself.
I'm talking
about before that, man.
Looking into your own eyes,
it just fucks you up.
No way.
Here it is.
We gotta get rid of it. I don't want
my other-world dad and brother finding it.
Yeah, they'd probably kill you
if they did.
Cool helmet!
Back the way I came ♪
("EVIL THOUGHTS"
BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING) ♪
Nothin' looks the same ♪
And the breadcrumbs
I've left along the way ♪
- I have lost my way ♪
- Now have been eaten away ♪
By the birds I have left
In my past ♪
- The past I've run from ♪
- Should I proceed? ♪
Should I proceed my darling? ♪
Or turn back around? ♪
Lord, let me know
What I should do ♪
Evil thoughts
Evil powers seek my mind ♪
I feel lost every time, oh! ♪
Evil force
Evil ways close behind ♪
I need love
I need love, I need love! ♪
All I know ♪
Isn't always the truth, yeah ♪
All I know ♪
Everything ♪
Isn't always the case, oh ♪
All I know ♪
Isn't always the truth ♪
All I know ♪
Isn't always the case ♪
As the days grow long ♪
- Fuck off!
- (SONG STOPS) ♪
(GROWLS SOFTLY)
(CHUCKLES) Who's that guy?
That's just
some rude motherfucker
who I say hi to every time,
and never says hi back!
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
(PEACEMAKER SIGHS)
(PHONE CLICKS)
(GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(LAUGHS)
Oh, Chris, turn that off.
Oh my God.
Come on. Come on. Stop.
(GENTLE MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
("REAPERCUSSION" BY
THE CRUEL INTENTIONS PLAYING) ♪
When you drink
When you smoke ♪
When you scream,
When you cu-cu-curse ♪
Reapercussion ♪
Gotta lie, gettin' high
Gotta fight till it hurts ♪
Echo in my mind
Of chaos left behind ♪
The melodies within
They're kickin' in ♪
(THRASH METAL GUITAR RIFF) ♪
- Songs from the dead ♪
- Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
- Playing in my head ♪
- Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
Evil melodies
Keep pushing me ♪
For retaliation ♪
Reapercussion ♪
- (MONITOR BEEPING)
- (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(WHISTLES)
- Let's go.
- No, no, wait, wait.
Let's give him
a few more minutes,
make sure he doesn't
come back for something.
Come back for something?
Yeah, he's going to a party,
a get-together with friends.
Oftentimes,
people will buy a gift
like a bottle of champagne,
a a housewarming thing.
Isn't a housewarming gift
solely for people
- who just moved into a new home?
- FLEURY: No.
It's any gift that you give
to someone in their house.
- It warms the house.
- No, it's not.
It's just for people moving
into a new place.
- That guy
- Vega.
- Vega. He's right.
- None of this matters.
The point is, is that when I go
to someone's house,
I will often buy a gift,
then I forget the gift.
And then I don't remember
until I'm halfway
to the place I'm going.
Well, personally, though,
I just say fuck it.
I forgot it.
I just want to party.
- Get lit.
- Yeah, I love to get lit.
Bonus, you can drink
the champagne afterwards
by yourself.
Well, that's you.
And that's probably
50 percent of people.
But a lot of people are
more considerate,
and they will come back.
So in case this hick
is one of those people,
we won't get caught
with our pants down.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC
CONTINUES) ♪
(FOOT TAPPING ON FLOOR)
Stop bouncing.
(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(DOORBELL CHIMES)
- Hey.
- Hey.
Hold on.
Will you text the others
and tell them
to meet us on the roof?
Sure.
ECONOMOS: I gotta say,
you're not really the person
I expected to play host.
Well, Adebayo lives
in a snake pit.
Adrian lives with his mother,
who might be rotting
Norma Bates-style
for all I know.
And every time I go to Chris's,
Eagly literally tries
to kill me.
(CHUCKLES) Fucking Eagly.
Oh, this is surprisingly nice.
EMILIA HARCOURT: Yeah,
just look out for the dog shit.
Asshole neighbors
bring their dogs up.
- I like dogs.
- You like dog shit?
- No.
- Hey, guys.
- How did you get up here?
- VIGILANTE: Fire escape.
I got beer.
Don't be climbing up
my fire escape, dude.
(LAUGHS)
Where do you get
this stuff from?
It's funny, right?
- Give me one of those.
- Yeah.
(VIGILANTE SIGHS)
- Want one?
- Duh.
(SHATTERS)
VIGILANTE: Oh, okay.
- Here you go.
- Right, yeah.
Yeah. Oh, okay.
Just hand it to him.
Yeah, no, I'll just
I'll just hand it to him.
Probably the best thing.
Should've done that right away.
VIGILANTE: Yeah.
- Motherfuckers! (LAUGHS)
- (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- Econogoat!
- What up!
Back home where he belongs.
The missing piece
of the puzzle, man. There he is!
Hey.
- Did you guys come together?
- No, dude.
We met in the stairwell
on the way up.
Oh! (CHUCKLES) Okay, okay.
- Chips and dips and brewskis
- Leota.
we doin' it up in style!
Hey, Ads.
- Good sir.
- Oh. Mm.
- Miss you, girl. Yeah.
- You too.
Wait, what happened to your eye?
Oh, nothing. It's stupid.
- Hey.
- Ooh, yeah.
- To the 11th Street Kids.
- ECONOMOS: Yeah.
We came,
we motherfuckin' rocked it.
(CHUCKLES)
No matter how far away
we are from each other,
even our boy Economos,
no one will ever break us apart.
- Yes!
- Yeah!
- ECONOMOS: Yeah!
- Right on! Fuck yeah, bro!
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
All right, Mexicali,
you take your gadget,
scan for any anomalies
you find throughout that house.
Ponyboy, don't let them
out of your sight.
Titties, I want you
to take the front door.
Encino Man,
you take the back door.
- Got it?
- Yeah.
But not the fucking names, dude.
You can't just call us that.
Where do you think we are?
Fucking Berkeley?
How else
am I gonna remember you?
You know what?
You just got demoted.
Your new name is Barely Legal.
(SCOFFS) Fuck off, man.
Okay, now it's Kewpie Doll.
Keep it up.
- Fuck.
- Let's go.
(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(PINS CLICKING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(GADGET CHIMING)
(GADGET TRILLING)
What even is that thing?
Measures traces
of non-terrestrial energies.
(GADGET BEEPING)
I'm picking up something.
- (UNFOLDING CHAMBER PULSATING)
- (GADGET TRILLING)
(GADGET WHIRRING RAPIDLY)
- What the fuck?
- Jesus.
This is
a dimensional discrepancy.
This is major, man.
(MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
- (VEGA SCREAMS, GROANS)
- (THRILLING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
KLINE: (IN DISTANCE) Jesus!
(EAGLY SCREECHING)
VEGA: Shoot it! Shoot it!
KLINE: I'm fucking trying!
It's a bird, dude!
- (SCREECHES)
- (GUNSHOT)
- KLINE: Fuck!
- (VEGA SCREAMS)
VEGA: Fucking bird!
(SCREAMS)
(GUNSHOTS)
Kewpie!
(KLINE GRUNTS)
- (EAGLY SCREECHES)
- (VEGA SCREAMS)
(SQUAWKS)
Titties! Encino Man!
Get in here!
(VEGA SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
I can't tell
how big this thing is.
(VEGA SCREAMS)
Fucking bird blindness.
(FLEURY PANTING, SCREAMS)
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
(GASPS, GROANS)
(WHIMPERS, SCREAMS)
(THRILLING MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(FLEURY PANTING)
- (EAGLY SCREECHES)
- (FLEURY GRUNTS)
(EAGLY SCREECHES)
(GROANS)
(SCREAMS, WHIMPERS)
(SCREECHES)
(FLEURY GRUNTS, GROANS)
Hold on. Oh, fuck!
- (GROANS) Fuck!
- (EAGLY SCREECHING)
(SIGHS)
(EAGLY SQUAWKS)
- Thank God. Fuck.
- (WHEEZING)
Hang in there, Titties.
You're gonna be okay.
(GURGLES, GRUNTS)
- (IN STRAINED VOICE) Look out.
- Huh?
- (SCREECHES)
- (FLEURY SCREAMS)
- (SHARP THUD)
- (MUSIC STOPS) ♪
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
(CHIRPS)
- ("DIRTY MONEY" BY IDA MARIA PLAYING) ♪
- Pay me all your dirty money ♪
I'm your favorite monkey
Watch me go! ♪
- (VOCALIST CHUCKLES)
- Help, help, help ♪
Cocaine
Shoulda seen the coke get ♪
Lined up in the backstage
At my show ♪
Everybody wanna be full makeup
And on TV ♪
Talking 'bout your jealousy ♪
Mum, I know I look insane ♪
But they all promised me
Champagne ♪
Swear they want me
For my brain ♪
Pay me all your dirty money ♪
I'm your favorite monkey
Watch me go ♪
Cocaine
Shoulda seen the coke get ♪
Lined up in the backstage
At my show ♪
- Girls in line wanna be a star ♪
- (LAUGHS)
Honey
You're not getting far ♪
- Not with psychotherapy ♪
- (SONG QUIETENS) ♪
Please, don't put
Your parents through ♪
Naughty days in Malibu ♪
Coming off your ecstasy ♪
Pay me all your dirty money ♪
I'm your favorite monkey
Watch me go ♪
(HARCOURT CLEARS THROAT)
Hey.
Hey.
I pulled you over here
with my fishing line.
Yes, I saw that.
Maybe you think
that's disrespectful.
I don't know.
You could have torn a hole
in my shirt.
It's not cool.
(SLURRING) Oh, man.
It ain't been the same
since you left, man.
- Fuck you.
- (LAUGHS) I'm serious.
Look, I know sometimes
you think you don't matter,
but you do.
To all of us.
To everyone here.
Do you guys get together
like this a lot?
No, not all of us,
just individually.
So me and Chris, obviously.
- ECONOMOS: Yeah, obviously.
- Me and Harcourt.
- ECONOMOS: Harcourt.
- Mm.
And Chris and Adrian,
Chris and Harcourt.
- Chris and Harcourt?
- (SNAPS FINGERS)
(SQUEALS, LAUGHS)
What is up with that?
- Your guess is as good as mine.
- (BOTH LAUGH)
- Oof.
- You doing okay, though?
Uh, hello. Yes.
Mm, you seem a little stressed.
Okay, well, it's the job.
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
- Well, shit. Quit.
- (SONG FADES OUT) ♪
- Quit?
- Yeah.
Yeah, do what I'm doing.
I don't need anybody else.
I just go off
and forge my own path.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(CHUCKLES)
You making any money doing that?
- (SNORTS) No.
- (ECONOMOS LAUGHS)
Not yet,
but but but I will.
- Ah.
- And what you gonna do?
You just gonna I don't know,
just sit around
and be scared your whole life?
Yes.
I've had crippling anxiety
since I was a kid.
I don't think I'm gonna change
that much now.
Shit.
No, what are you doing?
What are you fucking doing?
- I love you, brother.
- You love alcohol. (CHUCKLES)
(FAINT RUMBLING)
KLINE: (MUFFLED) Fleury!
Fleury!
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Fleury!
- Mm.
- Fleury!
- (FLEURY GROANS)
(SIGHS)
A fucking duck attacked me.
We gotta get these people
to a hospital.
We gotta go.
("THIS TIME IT'S LOVE"
BY D'MOLLS PLAYING) ♪
PEACEMAKER: Even Evergreen's
pretty from above, huh?
HARCOURT: Hm.
PEACEMAKER: Hey.
What happened?
No big deal.
Some dude at a bar
fucking with me.
(CHUCKLES)
Like that time
a couple months ago?
- Sure.
- Yeah.
Or like
the first time we talked,
you know, in that bar?
Mm, the bar you fucking
followed me into.
That's the one. (CHUCKLES) Yes.
Yeah. Yes, I did.
I followed you in there
'cause I thought you were cool.
- Cool?
- Yeah.
- Sure.
- I still think you're cool.
Okay. (CHUCKLES)
Anyway
That bar,
filled with not great people.
It's not a great spot.
You know, I figured
if somebody was
looking for a fight,
that'd be a real good place
to find one.
- That's all.
- So that's your theory here?
PEACEMAKER: Not a theory.
Just a thought I had
I couldn't shake.
That I go around trying
to get into fights?
I don't know what you do.
You wear a costume and go out
and beat the shit out of people.
(SIGHS) Maybe it takes one
to know one, okay?
That's not happening.
That would be fucking stupid.
I'm just saying,
you've just been so upset
ever since Task Force X
disbanded.
I'm worried about you.
- Worried about me.
- What?
Yeah.
You know, we both know
that's what you'd like.
What?
Yeah, you'd like me
to be some sort of
damaged, broken bird
'cause, you know,
water seeks its own level
and all that.
Sorry.
I'm not as fucked up
as you, Chris.
I never said you were.
All right. Uh, fuck this. Mm.
- This time it's love ♪
- This time it's love ♪
- This time it's love ♪
- This time it's love ♪
This time it's love ♪
This time it's love ♪
Sometimes my heart feels
Like beating through my chest ♪
Sometimes we'll be apart ♪
- (SONG FADES OUT) ♪
- (BREATHES DEEPLY)
- (YELPS)
- (LOUD THUD)
(GROANS)
Eagly, were you fucking
shit up again?
(GRUNTS)
(PANTS)
(TALONS STEPPING)
(EAGLY CHIRPING)
Hey. Come on.
(COOS)
My guy, you're the best.
- (COOS)
- You're the best.
- (SCREECHES)
- (GRUNTS) Hey, hey!
Hey, hey.
- (EAGLY SQUAWKS)
- Sorry.
(SIGHS)
(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(KEYPAD BEEPING)
(LOCK CHIMES, BUZZES)
(UNFOLDING CHAMBER PULSATING)
- (KEYPAD BEEPING)
- (LOCK CHIMING)
(MUSIC FADES) ♪
AUGGIE SMITH:
Yeah, Keith, you find anything?
No, no, no.
No one knows where he is.
You call that Karen girl,
the one he's
Yeah. Okay.
I'm trying to think
anywhere else he could be. I
What's the blood
in the library from?
You don't think
it's those pills again, do you?
(CELL PHONE CHIMING)
("WE DON'T NEED A CURE"
BY HARDCORE SUPERSTAR PLAYING) ♪
Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
Won't be complicated
Won't be compromised ♪
No shame in who you are ♪
Trying to confuse us
We don't need a cure ♪
You know you're not alone ♪
If you say it, then mean it ♪
If you mean it, then do it ♪
This one's for the outcast
For those about to fall ♪
This is for the lowlife
This is for us all ♪
Lalalalalala, lalalalala ♪
This is for the outcast ♪
- We don't need a cure ♪
- (SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
Pokémon is plural, not Pokémen.
Well, I'm sorry.
Pokémen's grammar
is not my bag, man.
When you were learning that,
I had two hot bitches
sucking my dick.
What did they look like?
One was blonde and one was bald.
Why was she bald?
What were their names?
Gertrude, Francine.
The Peppermint twins.
- I'll never forget.
- Yeah? Where was this?
In Portland, Oregon.
- Real hot?
- Super hot.