Palm Royale (2024) s02e03 Episode Script

1
- [spiritual music plays]
- [bell tolling]
[nun] Holy Saint Augustine,
patron saint of excesses,
drunkenness, morphine, roulette, horse
racing, petty theft, blah, blah, blah.
It is me again, your devoted Lotte.
I've gotten myself into a bit of a pickle.
[child screams]
[Lotte] Norma?
[Maxine]
If you want to understand a tragic ending,
you have to go back to the beginning.
[Lotte] Norma!
[young Norma sobs]
Agnes, what have you done?
She was upset, so she started running
and slipped on the moss on the stairs.
Stupid Swiss clogs.
[Maxine]
The surprise ending was there all along.
But we were all too busy
looking in different directions.
"Your father has died. Stop.
Sudden heart attack. Stop.
Very sad. Stop.
Come home to Palm Beach. Stop."
Thank you, Saint Augustine.
I always knew you to be a fine fellow.
The hall of Dellacortes,
the oldest European inbred family.
These rich turds always screwing each
other and everybody else along the way.
And now,
you will take your place among them.
They'll know I'm not her.
[Lotte]
Norma has been gone from home for years.
Tragedy and time change children so.
I'm scared.
I brought this when I came here,
and now it's yours.
So, Norma Dellacorte,
hurry along.
Palm Beach is waiting to welcome you home.
[dramatic music playing]
[Maxine] We tell ourselves stories
so that we can live the lives
we've always dreamed of.
A poor diabetic girl
with a chance at life.
[chuckles] A fabulous life at that.
What was I to do?
You've lived a double life for so long.
Perhaps, in some ways,
that explains my affinity for you.
You realize I've taken
a tremendous risk telling you all of this.
Yes, I see.
My life has been sustained by secrets.
But you must understand
I expect complete discretion.
My life…
- Your life depends on it.
- [sighs]
[line rings]
[on phone] Palm Royale front desk.
It's me.
I need you to make someone disappear.
[Maxine] The happiness was all used up
in the middle, wasn't it?
The ending,
like the beginning, is never good.
[clicks pen]
[sighs] It's done.
I'm divorced.
Good, because if Norma finds out
you spent the night here,
she'll spatchcock me
like a fine French hen.
Hang on to your feathers, Henny Penny.
I'll be out of here soon. [sighs]
Wouldn't trouble you,
could you get some of your porters
to take my luggage to the QE2?
With pleasure.
And from all of us here at the Palm
Royale, we wish you a very bon voyage.
[door closes]
I wish I had known you, Stella Rue.
Maybe I would've understood
your son a little better.
Maybe I wouldn't have ended up here
with all you ladies.
[chuckles] No offense.
[Maxine] And as the old saw goes,
when one door closes, another one opens.
Gentlemen, is this a noise complaint?
We'll close the windows next time.
We have reason to believe
you're harboring a fugitive.
We have a warrant to search the premises.
Well, heaven's sake.
There's no fugitive hiding here.
What an absolutely intangible, impossible,
and flagrantly bizarre insinuation.
I am gravely beyond offended, gentlemen.
Well… [grunts]
[agent] Roger that.
Mary, Mary,
if you can hear me, don't move.
Half a dozen federal agents
are combing the house.
Do not move, do not talk,
do not dare to quiver.
[agents chattering]
Mary!
Hello, Evelyn. [chuckles]
I see someone has had
their coitus "interrupted-us."
Mary, quick, hide behind a statue,
climb inside a vase. Something.
Evelyn.
What the hell is going on?
Um… Uh…
[sighs] You know what?
Fuck it. Every woman for themselves.
Quick, she's in here. I've got her.
Quick before she kills me.
- Where?
- [Evelyn] There.
Terrible brute that she is.
Your fugitive stands in front of you.
Apprehend her
before she tries to kill me too.
That's not Linda Shaw.
Oh, you haven't heard.
Linda has flown the coop.
[stammers] Come again?
I am just here to deliver
a friendly message from Norma.
Norma is having a very large, very
festive event at the Dellacorte today.
It is sure to be a roaring good time
for everyone in attendance.
You may have noticed that you have not
received an invitation to said event.
You may be wondering,
did a lazy postman
slip it into the wrong slot?
No, your invitation
was not lost in the mail.
It was never sent
because you are not invited, Evelyn.
Well, thank you, Mary.
I think you've more than made your point.
Don't shoot the messenger.
[Douglas] Maxine.
Geez. "Hark, who goes there?" to you.
I thought you'd be in Baden-Baden by now.
I leave tonight.
My conservator, Evelyn Rollins,
has signed my permission slip to travel.
I got my tickets,
and I just came here to say goodbye.
We already said goodbye
when I promised to give you
half the baby's trust
and flew Inda-Lay to Uba-Cay.
I'm here to say oodbye-gay
to Obert-Ray, not you. What?
Hiya. Where do you want
the 128 yards of velvet?
Velvet?
Uh, yeah,
just put it in the parlor, please.
Are you having a party?
No. Please.
Mary, you're here?
In this realm, yes.
It must be nice
to just be out walking around,
fully accepted back into society.
No consequences
for everything you've done.
One of the perks of being invisible.
[Mitzi]
The first Saturday of the new season.
Norma says it'll be
the wedding of the century. [giggles]
What in the purple cabbage patch
is going on here?
Maxine. I thought you were in Baden.
It's Baden-Baden, Mitzi.
There's two of them.
Douglas.
Explain.
This is a party.
Well, it's not really a party.
It's a ceremonial betrothal portrait
to mark my…
- our…
- You… Your what?
Engagement.
Look, this ceremony takes place every time
one of the members
of the founding families of Palm Beach,
uh, the Dellacortes, the Donahues,
the Davidsouls, gets engaged.
Um, the portrait, uh,
was printed on all the front pages
of the society magazines worldwide,
all over the country.
I'm sorry to be the one
to have to tell you all that.
Seems I'm the only one
up to being honest with you.
It's just a bunch of ritual
and regalia, Max. It's nothing.
[Mary]
Nonsense. It's a 180-year-old tradition.
This is the Davidsoul orb.
It's essential to the ceremony.
And this is the famed Donahue scepter.
Long may he poke.
I have to douse the people with the oil,
and Norma made me Mitzi's maid of honor.
Sorry.
[scoffs]
Well, you all enjoy your, uh,
your picture party.
Ceremonial betrothal portrait.
Whatever. I will be hitting all the…
the glitzy-ritzy hot spots in Europe,
like Paris, and London, and England.
Uh, and, uh… and exotic places
with deceptive spellings
like Ljubljana and Bruges.
I lost my virginity in Ljubljana.
Congrats.
Where are you going?
I am going to say goodbye to the only
decent person in this town.
- [Douglas] Wait, Maxine…
- Don't Maxine me, Douglas.
I can't believe you. You're already
getting your engagement photos taken.
Norma insisted.
Uh, she wanted it to be in the papers
before Mitzi started showing more.
Norma, that homicidal maniac!
[Douglas] Maxine, I am worried about you.
My mother had all these wackadoo ideas
about Norma as well,
and she ended up destitute,
divorced, and dead of a broken heart.
I mean,
she practically drowned in her own tears.
[sighs] Well, you don't have to worry
about that with me
'cause I am a strong swimmer.
Why's this door locked?
Robert is resting. No visitors allowed.
He will wanna see me.
- He won't.
- He will.
He won't.
Please see that he gets navel oranges.
They're his favorite, full of vitamin C.
Let me look after his navel.
And tell him I'll write.
Get out of my house now!
[breathes shakily]
Max, Max, wait.
You… You can't leave.
[sighs]
- [sighs]
- I need my mother's engagement ring back.
Y-Y-You understand?
Of course.
[groans]
You can take this scratched up…
[inhales] …non-ceremonial, zero-carat,
bubblegum ring and…
[sighs] Wouldn't you know,
the one thing in my life that
doesn't wanna leave me. [breathes shakily]
- Really?
- [grunts]
[sighs]
- [groans]
- These theatrics are exhausting.
You know I bloat
when I'm anticipating travel. [sighs]
Come on.
[gulps, coughs]
[chuckles]
You did that on purpose.
It was an accident.
I need my mother's engagement ring back
before you leave.
Before I leave?
Uh, I'll work on it, but…
Douglas, if I'm late for that boat,
it's your fault!
[muttering]
- [car door closes]
- Well, well, well, look who it is.
Evelyn. Hey, e-everything hunky-dunky?
Everything
is most definitely not hunky-dunky.
Because apparently,
someone broke Linda Shaw,
AKA Penelope Rollins, AKA
the biggest ting in my taint, out of jail.
And at this very moment, federal agents,
having already seized the Rollins mansion,
are in the process of freezing
the estate's assets
and confiscating
all of my earthly possessions.
Oh, boy.
I have been racking my brain to figure
what kind of criminal mastermind
could orchestrate such a brazen
and complex symphony of "sinistry"?
[gulps]
And it doesn't take
a Sherlock Hemsley to deduce
there's only one person
with the cleverness, the intellect,
and the downright diabolical genius
to pull this off.
[inhales sharply]
Norma.
Well, I don't think Norma is the only
person clever enough to… pull it off.
- I'm just saying I…
- Oh! Good.
You are still here.
Apparently as maid of honor,
I'm in charge of making sure that ring
gets through your lower intestine,
and on to Mitzi's finger.
Prune time. Down the hatch.
I'm so sorry you had to see all that.
I was just on assignment.
Listen, ladies,
no time for prunes and apologies.
Uh, Evelyn has just told me
something quite shocking.
That Norma has, uh,
broken Linda out of jail,
uh, resulting in Evelyn
losing her house and all of her money.
- [gasps]
- And when I get my hands on that witch…
Oh, no, no, no, wait, wait,
wait, wait, Evelyn, wait.
Priorities. Let's focus on what's left
of the Rollins fortune, shall we?
Um, how many feds did you say were there?
I don't fucking know. Maybe seven.
Okay.
Uh, and how many birds
are in your collection?
422, not including the recent shipment
of eight rare sunset-hombre flamingos.
Seven agents, roughly 430 birds,
approximately 18 pieces
of furniture in each room.
Round up, multiplied by 60,
- divide by two… Mm-hmm.
- Prune.
Allow 20 minutes for traffic,
I'm gonna say that those agents
are going to need roughly six hours
to do full inventory
of that house and get to the bank.
Ladies, all hands on deck.
That bank cannot freeze assets
that aren't there.
To the bank! [laughs]
[Dinah] Wait up!
[Ann] That's a lot of checks to cash.
Jesus, how many trips is this?
Keep it moving. Keep it moving.
And that is the last of the untraceable,
unreportable $9,999.
[sighs]
- Any movement down south?
- [sighs]
I fear Stella Rue's ring made a left at
my gallbladder and is sitting for a spell.
- Open up.
- [groans]
Thank you.
Poor Stella Rue.
I've actually been doing a lot of research
on the Dellacortes.
A lot of tragedy in the family.
[Maxine] Oh. Pray tell?
Norma and Stella Rue
saw their nearest and dearest perish
in mysterious ways.
Norma's Uncle Beauregard.
There was Stella's father Clarence.
And their beloved second cousin
once removed Henrietta Bing.
The list goes on and on.
Yeah, part of the reason
Norma amassed such a fortune
is because there
was nobody left to inherit it.
Wasn't Stella Rue an heiress too?
What happened to all her money?
- Raoul Simmons.
- Who?
Hmm. That's Douglas's father.
He never talked about him.
What did you talk about for 20 years?
I don't know. Airports. Airport lounges.
Shampoo. [stammers]
Most marriages are built on less.
[Dinah] Prune time.
Raoul Simmons squandered
all of Stella Rue's fortune
before running off
with his much younger mistress.
- Well, like father like son.
- Ouch.
- [sighs] That was the last of the cash.
- [sighs]
To the safety deposit boxes.
- [Ann groans]
- [Evelyn] Lead on.
- Ladies.
- What?
If Evelyn finds out we are the reason
she's in this mess, she's gonna kill us.
- God.
- [Evelyn] Ladies, get a move on.
[Dinah clicks tongue]
Watch the money, Ralphie.
Gosh. Evelyn,
remember the last time we were here?
When we found
all of Norma's doohickeys and doodads.
And Douglas
and Linda's wedding invitation and…
- Oh, the Dellacorte crown and the gun.
- Mmm.
Gosh, that was a terrible time.
I inherited the majority of these
from Skeet's first wife, Linda's mother.
That's what happens
when you're the second wife.
You're always in the shadow
of the first wife, feasting on her crumbs.
Gosh, that's validating for me.
Oh, gee.
This ring.
It's supposed to symbolize
fidelity and commitment.
Don't these things
mean anything to anyone anymore?
- [Ann] Mmm.
- Depends on the carat.
Or was my marriage's demise
just destined from the start?
Maxine, enough.
Your marriage is over.
Don't ruin your life
trying to figure out what went wrong.
Doug's a dick. That's it.
Maxine, prune of solace. [sighs]
- To the vault.
- Ooh!
[grunts]
Ladies, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait. [pants]
Indulge me. [pants]
All those Dellacortes
that-that died mysterious deaths,
what if Norma offed them
so she could keep the fortune for herself?
That sounds very far-fetched, Maxine.
She tried to throw me overboard
a moving yacht.
And poisoned me with that grasshopper
that accidentally poisoned you.
That's not nothing.
[Evelyn] Can you blame her?
You took over her life.
And if that's true,
why not just bump off Douglas too?
[gasps]
The generation-skipping trust.
He's her only chance of unlocking it.
Well, that sounds like motive to me.
[Evelyn] I think… [grunts]
…you're onto something, Maxine.
Norma's trying to get rid of you
like she got rid of Stella Rue.
[Dinah] Riddle me this.
If Norma was a murderer,
I can't help but offer that she was
the last person that Axel spoke to,
leading me to believe that maybe she…
Norma did not kill Axel, Dinah.
Maxine is the one throwing around all
these accusations like so much confetti.
I am thinking, that is all.
Putting on my justice hat.
You're trying to get
the black widow stink off of you.
Well, of course I am, Evelyn.
I don't wanna be blamed
for something that I did not do.
And if Maxine is going to
accuse Norma of killing all these people,
why can't we just throw Axel
onto the heap?
Well, it doesn't align
with the working theory.
If Norma killed Dellacortes,
why would she kill Axel?
I don't know.
I'm still working out that detail.
Enough. Focus.
First things first, we have got to find
a bolt-hole to stash this stuff.
Hey.
What if we take the tunnels?
We can stash this
at the disgraced socialite apartment.
No one would ever think to look there.
- That's brilliant. To the tunnels!
- [chuckles]
Ladies, she just said to the tunnels.
Oh, they've got a party to go to
that we weren't invited to.
We will go to the tunnels.
Don't forget these.
One every hour.
- Pull. I'll come help you.
- Okay. [grunts]
Come back here. [panting]
God, Maxine, has it really come to this?
The two of us crawling through
the anus of Palm Beach,
dragging the dregs of my wealth,
unable to enter the club
through the front door,
reduced to being
unwanted mole women. [pants]
[screams] Oh. Jeezy creezy.
Don't ask about the gold.
What the hell are you doing here, Mary?
[sighs] Have you seen my bootlegger?
Oh, my God. Not the bootlegger again.
Oh, I appreciate your asking.
[inhales deeply]
Handsome is as handsome does.
My favorite thing to do is to just breathe
into his translucent chest hair.
I simply rest my nose upon it,
just rest it there
as if upon a bowl of glass noodles.
- Glass noodles. Nice.
- Yes. [chuckles]
I rest my nose there
and I nuzzle sweetly, to then fro.
To then fro. [inhales deeply] To…
Yes, okay.
We got it, Mary. Thank you. Goodbye.
Maxine, let's just get there.
- [Maxine] Bye, Mary.
- [Evelyn] Goodbye.
- [Maxine] You're strong.
- [Evelyn] Yeah, you too.
[panting]
And that is the last of the cash.
How long will I even be safe here?
And how will I tell Eddie that the
beautiful home he loves is no longer ours,
but the property of the US government?
[chuckling] God. Oh, my God.
I'm homeless
and Mary's rubbing one out with a ghost.
Just a typical day in Dogpatch.
- [stomach gurgling]
- I think there's
something coming around the mountain.
[grunts]
[grunts]
[sighs]
Jesus, Maxine.
That ring
is gonna rip through your intestines
- like a razor blade to wet newspaper.
- [toilet flushes]
[Maxine] I don't foresee said damage.
- It's just a measly little solitaire.
- [door opens]
[door closes]
False alarm. [sighs]
[Evelyn] Does that look like
a measly little solitaire to you?
[Maxine]
No, that looks like a gigantic emerald.
Well, if that's Stella Rue's
engagement ring,
then whose ring is rounding my equator?
[sighs]
Does Jesus have a middle name?
Some questions will never have an answer.
I think he does and it starts with an H.
[sighs]
Evelyn?
[sighs] Look at us.
[sighs]
Are we so desperate to find some reason
to why we ended up the way we ended up
that we spin conspiracy theories
about an old coot on a killing spree?
[scoffs] God. Have we learned nothing?
The real reason is much more simple.
We are where we are
because the world is a giant clusterfuck
designed to eat
ladies with gumption alive.
You think I'm like you? [chuckles]
In this moment? Yes.
I still believe in our theory.
Oh, come on, Maxine.
A little old lady like her?
Well, she hasn't always been old.
The complex crimes we are alleging
in our addled and compromised reasoning
couldn't possibly be committed
by one little woman.
- Maybe she had help.
- [door opens]
Ah, yes, the unmistakable smell
of Eau du Temps and Jungle Gardenia.
You've both been barred.
Norma would not be pleased.
Norma certainly has you
in her thrall, doesn't she?
As if you'd do anything for her.
The porters will be here
for your bags in two hours.
And as for your insinuations,
I'm sure I don't know what you mean.
Well, I do know that you know that
I know what you know, you know?
Criminy crackers. [breathes shakily]
Dr. Watson… [stammers]
…everything's coming together.
- To the law.
- To the law.
[sighs] Gosh,
we're doing a lot of running around.
[Evelyn] I'll say.
So you think
Norma Dellacorte is a murderer?
Yes. She's tried to kill me twice,
once from throwing me off a ship,
and once from garnishing
my grasshopper with insulin.
Believe me, I am not one
to throw in with this
psychedelic riverboat of a mind,
but it makes a lot of sense.
A lot of Dellacortes
have mysteriously died.
- Clarence. Irving.
- Uh… [stammers] Henrietta Bing.
Norma and Douglas
are the last two standing.
- So?
- We think she's offed them
in order to control Douglas
and the scrillions of dollars
he's meant to inherit. [inhales deeply]
Oh. You think this is crazy.
Or that I'm not ready
to emotionally disentangle myself
from my marriage or something like that.
Interestingly,
there are some guys in the basement
profiling a new species of criminal.
Serial killers.
Why would anyone wanna murder cereal?
Weetabix is disgusting.
Not… [stammers] A serial as in a series.
Repeat killers.
It's really fascinating work.
You know, one of the things
they've discovered is that
the perps like to keep little trophies,
you know, to remind them of their kill.
Little things that remind
them of a person that…
No. No, Virginia.
Do not get caught up in this mess.
- No, please get caught up!
- Catch up!
Forget it. I'm not sticking my neck out
on the line for you again.
Again?
Ever.
Wait.
You said they collect
little things.
What about all those doohickeys
and doodads in Norma's safety deposit box?
Those things weren't junk.
- [Evelyn stammers] They were trophies.
- [gasps] Norma's a serial killer.
- [breathes shakily]
- Oh, boy.
Look, you two gumshoes
find me some actual evidence,
and then maybe we can talk.
Unofficially.
But as for now,
I need y'all to leave.
Okay.
Thank you for that help
with the parking ticket, ma'am.
Paid in full. Good advice.
Didn't think about that. [chuckles]
I was gonna do installments.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
We cross-check the items in that box
with the Dellacorte deaths
- and Bob's your uncle?
- Jinx, buy me a Coke.
We gotta get that key
- to that safety deposit box.
- [gasps]
[Maxine] There's lots more
to talk about with shampoos.
There's Prell. Prell Plus. Prell Plus, um,
- Silky Lady. That's the one…
- Oh, hey. Can it, Maxine.
- Look who it is.
- [gasps]
What's he doing here?
Norma's little helper.
He does not have the look
of an innocent man.
[Evelyn] He does not.
Go get that key. I'm gonna follow him.
Oh, I love this. Look at us. [gasps]
We should open a detective agency.
Max and Ev's, detectives at large.
- Or something about us being ladies.
- Cool it, kumquat.
- Go get the key.
- Okay.
- Oh, my gosh.
- Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry.
[vehicle approaching]
- Brocade is having a moment.
- [Maxine imitating crowing]
- I don't like it.
- [imitating chirping]
- Well…
- I think it's heavy.
- [Maxine imitating hooting, crowing]
- It just adds pound…
One sec.
I just think it adds too much weight.
- Oh!
- [Dinah] Oh, what? Oh!
Excuse us. Hold on. Hold on.
[Maxine, Ann whispering indistinctly]
[Dinah] What?
[Douglas] Maxine?
[breathes deeply]
[ship horn blows]
[engine stops]
What is he doing?
You could fit a dead body in there.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Where's he going?
Do I follow him or the body?
Do I follow him or the body?
Damn it.
Pick a path, Evelyn. Pick a path.
- We gonna just…
- I don't know.
- There's gotta be a way around something…
- [Douglas] Maxine.
- Oh.
- Ladies,
would you excuse us?
- [Ann clears throat]
- [Dinah scoffs]
[scoffs]
Maxine, you can't be here.
You need to disconnect.
Unless you brought the ring?
I'm gonna hang on to it for now.
Um, I did bring some news,
uh, but it's far from wonderful.
[breathes deeply]
Your mother was murdered, Douglas.
By Norma.
No, no, no, I know it sounds crazy.
[inhales] Look, when we were at the bank,
it all just came together.
She got rid of your mother and then me
just so she could control you
and the baby trust.
I don't know.
There's something called serial killers,
- where they collect trophies.
- Trophies?
[groans] Dingle dangles
from the people they murder.
Maxine, this behavior of yours…
My mother was always coming up with
these conspiracy theories about Norma.
And now that we are divorced,
I am just worried
that you are gonna end up like her.
Destitute, alone, out of your mind,
and dead of a…
Of a broken heart, blah-blah.
Face it, Douglas,
you married your mother. [inhales deeply]
But unlike her, I'm not going anywhere.
She was a healthy 30-year-old woman,
Douglas.
It's physically impossible
to drown in one's tears.
[Douglas sighs]
[huffs]
[sobs] She was my mommy.
- Oh.
- [sniffles]
I know, sweetie.
Listen, I… I can prove everything.
I just need Norma's key
to her safety deposit box.
How in the world would we get that?
Your ding-dang portrait, that's how.
[regal music playing]
[Benny] Let the ceremonial
Dellacorte Portrait Ceremony begin.
First comes the chanting,
then comes the Latin.
Then comes the chanting in Latin.
Then the orb and scepter.
[Benny] Please proffer your plumes,
and make passage
for the Mighty Scepter of House Donahue.
[in Latin] Domino…
dominus…
[grunts]
…D'Agostino.
[in English] Next.
I never got to do
any of this s-sort of thing.
[Douglas]
You don't care about an orb and scepter.
Don't tell me whether or not
I care about an orb and scepter.
[in Latin]
E Pluribus unum. Veni, vidi, vici.
[in English] Boo.
[Benny] And now the glowing Orb
of House Davidsoul.
The orb rests to remind us
to ope our eyes
and waken.
- Ope and waken. Ope and waken.
- [sighs]
[all] Ope and waken. Ope and waken.
And then Mitzi enters
donning the Joan cloak.
Joan cloak?
Wherefore are you come this day to meet
the newest member of House Dellacorte?
Joan of Arc. Her cloak.
Supposedly it's what she was wearing
before the burning…
- situation.
- [Benny] She greets you.
- It's nice they took her coat off.
- Do you greet her?
[all] We greet her.
[Benny, in Latin] O tempora, o mores.
[all] O tempora, o mores.
O tempora, o mores.
[music continues]
[in English] And now the mammoth shield
to ward off attackers of the house.
That's my cue. Good luck.
- Oh. Oh.
- Douglas, get your ass in here.
[sword clinks]
[chandelier jingles]
[door closes]
The candles are aflamed.
Remember to smile.
Let's see those front-page
pearly whites. [chuckles]
Oh, great.
Dinah, you're gonna have to find
a way to hike up a smile, hon.
That's wrong. [clears throat]
Yes, you.
I th… I think what you're saying
is that you need me to move to my right.
[Ann] Yes.
Norma, would you mind move
a scooch to your right?
It really is your best angle.
You're a dear.
Oh, that's better. [chuckles] Lower.
A little lower.
Now forward.
Not you, Norma.
Everyone but Norma, forward.
Perfect.
Great.
Yep.
Got it.
[Douglas]
I can't wait to see what's in here.
I want Norma to pay.
You know,
I just can't help but thinking there's a…
a larger game afoot here,
something bigger than you and me.
What do you mean?
Well, perhaps we're here
because our-our families
made such bad decisions
that you and I had nothing to do with.
Uh…
[Maxine stammers]
Where is everything?
It's just a bunch of rocks and pebbles.
What's that say?
It says "Fuck you, Maxine."
Yes, I'm getting that same read.
Well, it was an interesting theory.
That's… [sucks teeth] That's all it was.
Norma's not a killer. [sighs]
You're just gonna have to let this go.
Maybe I don't want to let it go.
Maybe I just don't want to go.
[clicks tongue]
There's still time to make your boat.
Porters at the Palm Royale
should be getting my bags any minute.
I'll be sure to send your mother's ring
back after a good bleaching, of course.
Thank you.
Hey.
I'll give you a minute.
I'll pull the car around.
Maybe one last goodbye.
[club manager] Let's go.
Get her bags to the boat.
[Evelyn] Hello, Sidonius.
[mouthing words] Why…
You can stop pacing.
My legs are crossed,
and my lips are locked.
And you can stop running me
the hell around.
Here's something most people don't
understand about the human condition.
As soon as you do the terrible thing,
the thing you never thought you'd do,
a new question starts to haunt you
day and night.
Was it worth it?
And that question
will suck the very life out of you.
[Sidonius]
Spoken like someone who's been there.
You, however, have crossed a line,
a line that I would never cross.
Because you never had to.
Geez. [stammers]
You come into my office like you own it.
You people… Everything is yours, isn't it?
When I started working for Norma,
it felt good.
It felt good to be able to afford
to give my children what they wanted.
You get used to nice things.
You of all people should understand that.
Horse riding lessons, piano,
archery.
And when your children look up at you
and ask you to keep the promises you made,
you'll do anything.
Because it's your fault
you got in this deep.
You'll let yourself go
further and further.
- A rhinestone headboard.
- Excuse me?
Don't worry about that, Evelyn.
That's not the point. The point is…
- [door opens]
- …you'll do anything.
Even…
Even what?
Even…
Even…
[Sidonius] Even…
[Evelyn] Even…
Murder!
Mortgage.
Mortgage?
- Hey. So happy to see you. [chuckles]
- Oh. [sighs, chuckles]
Oh, Robert.
- Hi. How are you?
- [sighs]
- [grunts] Ouch! [chuckles]
- Oh, I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you?
- It's okay. [chuckles]
- Did I open some wound or something?
I'm good. I'm alive. [chuckles]
Listen, I'm… [sighs]
I'm off to Europe, and I-I couldn't leave
without saying goodbye. [chuckles]
[chuckles]
Is Norma taking good care of you?
[chuckles] As she always does.
She's keeping me well-fed and well-rested.
And my shots,
she's given them to me right on schedule.
Well…
She loves you.
In fact, you're probably
the only person in the world she loves.
[chuckles]
How are you, Maxine?
- How am I?
- Hmm.
I don't know.
My mind's been sort of fractured,
you know, all over the place
the past couple of weeks.
[sighs]
I had this crazy theory that… [sighs]
I thought Norma was a… was a murderer,
and she kept little trophies
from her kills, and I…
[sighs] I really thought I had her.
But it turns out,
I think it was just a… a distraction.
A way to not leave.
A way to hold on to something that's…
that's already gone. [chuckles]
It doesn't matter where you go,
I'll be waiting for you right here.
I am gonna miss you
so damn much. [chuckles]
I'm gonna miss you
so damn much. [chuckles]
[sighs] Gosh.
Speaking of trophies.
[sighs] The Dellacortes sure love
celebrating themselves,
- don't they? [chuckles]
- Mm-hmm.
Polo championship.
Golf, of course.
Oh, it's a little Douglas section.
[chuckles]
"Douglas Dellacorte. Best attitude."
[Robert chuckles]
Sweet. Douglas Dellacorte.
"Most interested in the subject."
[chuckles] Is that a thing?
"Best breaststroke in Florida."
- Wow. Stella Rue Della…
- [object clatters]
[Robert] What is that?
This is…
This is Stella Rue's emerald ring.
Oh.
Oh, my gosh, that's it.
Of course that's it!
Oh, my gosh, the trophy room! [gasps]
The trophy room, what?
- What are you doing, Maxine?
- [scoffs]
Look, look! There's all sorts
of doohickies in these things! [sighs]
- So?
- [exclaims] Look at this! [gasps]
[gasps] Look, look, look,
Robert, cuff links. Okay?
Uh, "AR."
Axel Rosenhips.
Oh, my gosh.
Dinah was right.
Norma killed him too.
- [gasps]
- Oh, my God, Maxine, you gotta stop.
She didn't kill him.
She told me he died of a broken heart.
- That's it. What? [chuckles]
- [stammers]
Where are you going?
I'm going to stop that killer
before she starts killing people
that she wants to kill
before they get killed!
A normal day, please.
[Evelyn] Maxine!
Evelyn. Evelyn.
[sighs] Where's Norma?
The place is deserted. Some party.
Okay, listen, listen, listen. [sighs]
I found the trophies, a-and they
weren't in the safety deposit box.
- What?
- They are in the, get this,
the trophy room.
Our cuckoo theory about her being
a killer isn't so cuckoo after all.
And I know why the club manager
was acting so strange.
He helped her?
He was helping himself to the Palm Royale.
He has mortgaged the place to the hilt.
Because of him,
it's up to his eyeballs in debt
and in desperate need of cash.
We have cash.
Wait a minute.
- You're already there, aren't you?
- Yes, I am.
We can buy the Palm Royale.
- And rule Palm Beach.
- [gasps] Evelyn.
Okay, first… first, we gotta put
that homicidal maniac in jail.
And I get to wring her neck
for releasing Linda.
You'll have your shot, but I think I have
to do this by myself, you understand?
Not really, no.
Huh.
Just the woman I was looking for.
Can I fix you anything?
What is it y-you drink again in Tennessee?
[stammers]
Liquid shit?
Everybody knows that
my favorite drink is a grasshopper.
Nasty little grasshopper
for a thieving locust.
How dare you insult the humble grasshopper
and its penchant
for storing up food for winter.
That's an ant, you idiot.
Since you're, uh, an expert in fables,
I've got one for you.
It's about a swan.
A beautiful, rich swan
that lives in a tall tower of riches.
And every now and then,
even though it's against swan law,
she would kill a duckling.
And then she would
squirrel away little mementos.
Until one day,
a common little mouse came to town
and found all those mementos,
proving to everyone that that swan
is a dirty little killer.
Sending her to jail for birds,
evil birds.
Bird jail.
Since you've connected all the dots,
why don't you call the police
and end all this?
That's a good idea.
I mean, I had that idea.
In fact, I'll do you one better.
I am gonna call
my personal contact at the FBI. [scoffs]
You just stay right there.
Don't move.
Don't you move.
Gotta get the phone.
It's over here around the corner.
I got it.
You know, every fable has a moral.
So tell me, Maxine,
what's the moral of this fable?
[dispatcher] FBI, Palm Beach. Hello?
- No, Maxine, no. Don't kill me. Don't.
- Hello?
- Maxine!
- What?
- [dispatcher] Ma'am, are you all right?
- [screams]
- Ma'am?
- [gunshot]
Oh.
- Ma'am, can you hear me?
- [grunts]
- Help is on the way.
- I'll get you!
She's getting away!
Meet me at the beach! [yelps]
She's getting away! [gasps]
Evelyn! [panting]
[panting continues]
[jingling]
[siren wailing in distance]
[Evelyn] Maxine, what happened?
Did you find her?
[Douglas] Maxine?
What did you do?
[Norma] No, Maxine, no.
Don't kill me. Don't. Maxine!
[ship horn blowing]
[grunts]
I think maybe your ring
is about to exit the building.
[siren wailing continues]
Keep it.
[sighs]