The Dry (2022) s02e05 Episode Script
Interview
SHE SIGHS
Don't fuck this up.
What's going on?
Oh, you're here.
Thought you were at Alex's. I
was working on my portfolio.
Right, we ready?
Family meeting. Now?!
I have my interview. He
got the idea from you.
Dad, I DOOR BELL RINGS.
Oh, that'll be
Mina. Mina's coming?
Yeah.
Right. Um
I just Thank you all
for coming, by the way.
Some things have arisen over
the past few weeks that affect,
well, all of us.
And I thought it might be an
idea for us to sit down
Sorry. Sorry to
I think it's great we're
having a family meeting
and talking about stuff.
I just have an interview later,
so I might not be able to stay
for the whole family meeting.
Can I ask a question
about the family meeting?
Er Sure.
Why is Mina here? Are
you two back together?
Uh No.
No. But, uh
Cos I thought only family
members were at a family meeting.
Oh, what about Finbar?
Finbar's my partner.
If Tom and Mina aren't partners
I'm here as Tom's friend.
For support. Jesus
Actually, Bernie, if I might
I think it's wonderful
that Mina is here.
For Tom and
and for all of us.
I've sat on many a committee
throughout my academic career,
and believe me, there is
no substitute for diversity
of opinion.
All voices welcome here.
OK, er, right.
I'm aware that we might
have thrown a curve ball
We? I.
In mentioning selling the house,
which is why I wanted to
give everyone a chance
to air their feelings in an
open and a reasonable manner.
Very sensible. So,
who wants to go first?
I'll go first.
I don't want to sell this house.
Oh. Bernie
This is the house where
I raised my family,
where Ant was born,
where my mother died,
not to mention my
first-born son.
You might as well cut out my heart
and stamp it into the ground!
Anyone else?
Do we have to sell the house?
Well, I wish we didn't
But, like, is it the best time?
Just feels very sudden and, like,
there's a lot of uncertainty
and, uh, choices
and Mum's recovery.
I'm not the problem here.
I know. I know that
Tom can't live in a shed forever.
No-one's making him live in a shed!
Yeah, but where else can
I go? What about renting?
Have you any idea what the
rental market's like these days?
He's plenty of money!
He's not working.
I mean Why's he not working?
You've been using my car.
Er, um, we can talk
about this later, OK?
What's going on, Tom? Nothing.
Well, you told Shiv.
Oh, he didn't tell me.
So how do you know?
It doesn't matter.
Oh, is this another of
your little secrets?
What? I thought we
were here to be honest.
I'm just respecting
Dad's privacy, OK?
Why, what's he done? Nothing!
Sounds a bit fishy, Tom.
Yeah, look, can
we just please?
So you're not working, and
you haven't told anyone
Except Shiv. Can
we just leave it?
He's going through a lot.
What's he going through?
Nothing! Oh, for God's sake!
Just tell us what's
happened! No! Why?
Because! Because what?
Because it's not
for me to say! Why?
Because! Because what?
Because he was
smearing shit on a van!
Whose shit? Uh
It was just some dog shit.
Whose van? My boss'.
Ah, Tom, no. They, uh
They let me go.
They fired me. Before
the dog shit thing.
Is this why you
came to see me, hm?
What, you went to see Mina?
Well She asked
me to visit you.
Oh, is
that why you?
Ah, I see. I see. Uh
Look, I admit, it hasn't
been the greatest few weeks.
And, uh, maybe I didn't
handle things as well as I
But I've had some time
to think now, and, er
We've moved on, Bernie.
We don't need this house.
We could, uh, sell up now,
and both of us come out
of it pretty all right.
Now, Ant's, er,
got some figures
Yep. So, er, in the current market,
you guys could sell this place,
split the cash, probably come
out with an apartment each.
An apartment?
Yeah, nice little
one-bed somewhere local.
So this is what my
life has come to?
A windowless one-bedroom
apartment? Huh!
Not Not windowless.
No, we-we can't stay
living like this, Bernie.
You know, we've worked
hard all our lives.
We're mortgage-free.
Well, almost, yeah. Almost?
Which is quite a privilege
when you think about it.
I've been meaning to tell you.
I re-mortgaged the house.
When? A few weeks ago.
For what?! This and that.
What?! "This and that"? What
are you saying, Bernie?!
Tom, if-if I might, erm
I found a little
pied-a-terre in the west, er,
between the mountains and the
sea. Very reasonably priced.
It would have been a
crime to let it go,
and I've, uh, taken
on a little mortgage.
Bernie has kindly
provided the deposit.
FINBAR CLEARS HIS THROA
It's where I'll
write my next book.
TOM YELLS
How could you do this?!
It's an investment! For who?!
If we could all
just calm down
You don't even know this man,
and you're buying him property.
I have a lot of experience
with conflict resolution.
First rule - stay in the room.
I'm not staying in
that fucking room!
Wha?
How did you re-mortgage
without my signature?
Did you forge it?
Look, Tom, the payments
aren't that much.
I can manage it. Jesus
Christ, Bernie! That's fraud!
Oh, don't be so hysterical.
Why did I bother calling
a family meeting?
Clearly, we only make unilateral
decisions around here.
Ant! Yeah?
Tell your boss to come
do that valuation.
Are you sure? Yes!
So, what? You're gonna
just go ahead with this?
Why not? You did.
Look
It's only 100 grand!
He'll pay it back now if
you're so upset. Won't you?
We're selling the house, Bernie.
You can do what you
want with your share.
I don't even know you any more.
I bought that.
DOOR SLAMS
Well, I hope you're
happy! Me?! What did I do?
You brought her back.
That woman! That witch!
She's the one putting
ideas into his head,
he was grand out there till now.
Mum, did you forge
Dad's signature?
What if I did? It's my house!
What the fuck?
FINBAR CLEARS HIS THROA
They made peace in Northern
Ireland. They'll make peace here.
MOBILE PHONE CHIMES
Shiv? Caroline, I
really have to go
I'll give you a lift. OK.
And it's not just the fact that she
blames me for literally everything,
it's the total self-absorption,
too, you know? Yeah.
Like, the lack of interest
in anyone else's life!
Shiv, there's something
that I And do you know,
not one person has asked me what
this interview is for? Shi
I, um
And I'm not saying that to
make you feel bad, by the way.
But, you know you haven't
asked me, either, so
How could she do that?
So you're definitely
up for this, yeah?
Cos if I go to my boss and
you change your mind, it's
I won't change my mind. Cos
I really need this, Dad.
I'm done.
I'm fucking done.
Thanks, Dad. You're amaze balls.
Eddie! Caught that fish.
I look at her, she looks at me
In her eyes, I see the sea
And I don't know
What she'd see in me. ♪
KNOCK ON DOOR
Cuppa? Sorry. I just
needed to think.
You don't need to explain.
I probably should have
said something to Tom.
Little white lie for
the greater good.
Totally understandable.
I'm going to the shops.
Do you need anything? No.
Have a soak in the
tub. Bit of me-time.
FINBAR: Text if you
think of anything!
DOOR SHUTS
OK, I accept not everybody
gives a shit about art.
Can you slow down?!
It's not like medicine is
so fucking riveting, either.
Shiv OK, it might
save a few more lives.
Oh. Will you shut the fuck up?!
I'm Shiv?
Oh, for God's sake!
Jack, wh? What
are you doing here?
I'm here for the interview.
What are you doing? Are
you here for the interview?
Erm, kinda, yeah. Right.
And what time is your? Can
you hold Stevie for a sec?
What? I'm just
bursting for a piss.
Oh, erm
What is he doing here? Wha?
He doesn't need this,
it's for emerging artists.
He's not emerging, he's emerged.
Unless he's on
the judging panel.
Oh, my God, he's on the
judging panel. Of course he is.
This is fucking typical!
He's on the fucking
CAROLINE SNIFFS
Why are you crying?
Oh, my God, you're
pregnant. Shh!
How far along?
Almost four months.
I only found out
the other week. I
I thought it was just
really bad indigestion.
Oh, Caroline
Is it Shane's?
Yes, it's Shane's! Of
course it's Shane's!
I'm like 84%
sure it's Shane's.
So you've told him?
Of course I haven't
told him! OK.
So, what are you gonna do?
Get rid of it, obviously.
Really? Yes.
You sure?
I've booked the flights, I'm
going Saturday, it's done.
I just needed to tell
someone in case
I don't know, something came up.
Do you think maybe you
need some more time?
This wasn't meant to happen,
Shiv. It's not on my timeline.
What the fuck am I supposed
to do with a fucking baby?!
There y'are!
Thought you'd kidnapped my kid.
Why's she crying?
Everywhere I go, women crying.
Hey, Max. Thanks for seeing me.
God, I'm I'm sorry,
Tom. That sounds awful.
So how How could
I? I need a lawyer.
Tom, I respect both
you and Bernie.
I don't think I should
I'm not trying to put you in
an awkward situation here, Max.
I'm not. It's just, you know,
I've always felt you and I have a
special connection, you know?
Anyway, I value your advice.
Yeah, well, divorce is
a nasty business, Tom.
My advice is, try
some mediation.
Ah, no, no! No mediation.
We're past that.
I need a shark.
Have you ever had an abortion?
Yeah.
When?
Five years ago. In London.
Do you ever regret it?
No.
Then I won't, either.
I'm a different person to you.
Look, I don't think anyone
should have to be a mother
if they don't want to be.
Life's hard enough without that.
Just make sure it is
what you want for you.
Not just cos it doesn't
fit into some timeline.
Siobhan Sheridan?
Good luck.
Dearbhla Shiv.
Didn't realise that was you.
Your leaflet
inspired me to apply.
Well it did
say YOUNG artists,
but never mind, the judges
liked you. Come on in.
Hello, Shiv.
Hi. This is Caroline Sheridan.
I've an appointment this weekend.
I'd like to push it back.
Just putting out the bins.
Hello.
So you call this A Cycle Of
Shame: Meditations On Addiction.
Can you talk about that? Sure.
I'm drawn to both the abstract
and figurative in my work,
so I've used harsh lines
and a repetition of
colour to evoke
Yes. But why shame as a theme?
Have you done something
to be ashamed of?
Well, the piece is
about addiction.
Yes, a brave choice
of subject matter,
given that it's such a cliche.
I'm an alcoholic.
I tried getting sober in my
early 30s and kept failing.
Last year, I was doing pretty
well, made it to six months
before I fell spectacularly
off the wagon.
I did some things
I'm not proud of.
We addicts drink to
get rid of our shame.
And then we do things
when we're drunk
that make us more ashamed,
so it kind of becomes
a vicious cycle.
And what about the things you
did when you were not drunk?
Are you ashamed of those, too?
Of course.
That's what I'm
exploring in this piece
how one can be sober
but still messy.
But aren't we sick of the
trope of the "messy" woman?
What about the women
who just get on with it?
Who have jobs and raise kids,
and aren't endlessly talking about
their problems or their pussies?
Well
would that make great art?
Is this great art?
I just don't think young
women relate to this any more.
They're bored by it.
I think it's easy to
be bored when you're 23
and you haven't
made any mistakes.
You know, come back
to me when you're 40
and your life's in the shitter.
If you ask me, women are owed
at least several more centuries
of "messy". I mean, Jesus,
we've had a millennia of just
being baby factories or whores.
So you consider
yourself a feminist?
Oh, yeah.
So would you consider it feminist
to, erm, accept a job from a woman
who is eight months pregnant,
and then fuck her
boyfriend behind her back?
Or would you simply put that
down to being "messy"?
Oh.
Apology Champagne. Oh?
Did you get my flowers
last week? I did.
I am really sorry about
what happened. Erm
Er, but I've got good news.
My folks are selling the house,
and I brought it to Eddie,
which means I'll be
getting commission,
which means I won't need
mates rates, which means
I'm ready. To move in.
Is it OK - I took your
washing out of the machine?
Yeah, yeah. Of course.
Er, Ant, you
remember Mikhail? Hi.
He's subletting Pete's room
for a couple of months.
Oh. OK.
It just seemed like, you
know, after everything, that
it might be better for us
to take it slow, you know?
Right, yeah. Yeah.
We're not in any rush.
God, no! No!
Sure. You were the one with
the foot on the accelerator.
Are these yours?
Oh, come on! Did they shrink?
Hey, give them! Give them to
me! Give them to me! Give
You're such a dick!
He's such a dick.
Yeah. Yeah, I can see that.
This feels firm to me. No,
this is not a proper melon.
Here, this one. OK.
Caroline! Hey, hi!
What are you doing here?
Fe-Feeling the-the melons
Hi, I'm Caroline Er,
this is Marie-Luisa.
We work together.
And I am his girlfriend.
Right. Wow.
And you're Spanish? Half
Spanish, half Portuguese.
Yes. Erm, I think Rory
might have mentioned you.
When did you mention me? Er,
are you having a party or?
Oh, no. Just sugar cravings.
Period?
Yep. Yeah.
Er, anyway Er, yeah.
It was nice seeing you,
Rory. Yeah, you too.
Why didn't you say I
was your girlfriend?!
Ow, Jesus! Argh!
Kristen? Yes?
I just wanted to say I'm
sorry for everything.
I know I've caused
you a lot of pain.
And I know you and Jack
aren't together any more.
And I feel terrible for the
part I played in Oh, please.
Don't make yourself more
important than you are.
It's not like you were the
only one. It was Christmas.
Apology not accepted.
Go fuck yourself.
Hey, Shiv. How'd it go?
Why didn't you tell me
she was on the panel?
I didn't wanna freak you out.
She tore me to pieces in there.
Fuck it! It's some shitty
little parochial bursary,
you don't need it.
Actually, Jack, yes, I do!
And by the way, that's
easy for you to say,
you weren't in there
being totally fucking
HE CHUCKLES What?!
You look great when
you're angry. HE CHUCKLES.
Oh, my God.
It doesn't matter
what they think!
WHISTLE
So how'd it go?
It was a total fucking
shit show. What?! No!
Is it something to do
with your ex being here?
No. God Were yis fighting?
He was just being himself.
It wasn't just my ex.
His ex was on the
panel, my boss.
So what's your news?
Your text this morning.
You said you had something
to Ah, it's not really
Oh, come on. It sounded important,
and I need a distraction.
Look, I I didn't
wanna do this here.
Erm
I've been offered
to go to Australia.
Australia? One of my
business partners,
his brother lives in Melbourne,
and he wants to open
a restaurant with us.
When? Soon.
And obviously, there's
some considerations
Yeah, like what?
Like you.
The fact that I'm
falling in love with you.
What do you think?
You wanna ride off into
the sunset with me?
Hey, baby, swing
for the fences
Whatever consequences
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again. ♪
accessibility@itv.com
Don't fuck this up.
What's going on?
Oh, you're here.
Thought you were at Alex's. I
was working on my portfolio.
Right, we ready?
Family meeting. Now?!
I have my interview. He
got the idea from you.
Dad, I DOOR BELL RINGS.
Oh, that'll be
Mina. Mina's coming?
Yeah.
Right. Um
I just Thank you all
for coming, by the way.
Some things have arisen over
the past few weeks that affect,
well, all of us.
And I thought it might be an
idea for us to sit down
Sorry. Sorry to
I think it's great we're
having a family meeting
and talking about stuff.
I just have an interview later,
so I might not be able to stay
for the whole family meeting.
Can I ask a question
about the family meeting?
Er Sure.
Why is Mina here? Are
you two back together?
Uh No.
No. But, uh
Cos I thought only family
members were at a family meeting.
Oh, what about Finbar?
Finbar's my partner.
If Tom and Mina aren't partners
I'm here as Tom's friend.
For support. Jesus
Actually, Bernie, if I might
I think it's wonderful
that Mina is here.
For Tom and
and for all of us.
I've sat on many a committee
throughout my academic career,
and believe me, there is
no substitute for diversity
of opinion.
All voices welcome here.
OK, er, right.
I'm aware that we might
have thrown a curve ball
We? I.
In mentioning selling the house,
which is why I wanted to
give everyone a chance
to air their feelings in an
open and a reasonable manner.
Very sensible. So,
who wants to go first?
I'll go first.
I don't want to sell this house.
Oh. Bernie
This is the house where
I raised my family,
where Ant was born,
where my mother died,
not to mention my
first-born son.
You might as well cut out my heart
and stamp it into the ground!
Anyone else?
Do we have to sell the house?
Well, I wish we didn't
But, like, is it the best time?
Just feels very sudden and, like,
there's a lot of uncertainty
and, uh, choices
and Mum's recovery.
I'm not the problem here.
I know. I know that
Tom can't live in a shed forever.
No-one's making him live in a shed!
Yeah, but where else can
I go? What about renting?
Have you any idea what the
rental market's like these days?
He's plenty of money!
He's not working.
I mean Why's he not working?
You've been using my car.
Er, um, we can talk
about this later, OK?
What's going on, Tom? Nothing.
Well, you told Shiv.
Oh, he didn't tell me.
So how do you know?
It doesn't matter.
Oh, is this another of
your little secrets?
What? I thought we
were here to be honest.
I'm just respecting
Dad's privacy, OK?
Why, what's he done? Nothing!
Sounds a bit fishy, Tom.
Yeah, look, can
we just please?
So you're not working, and
you haven't told anyone
Except Shiv. Can
we just leave it?
He's going through a lot.
What's he going through?
Nothing! Oh, for God's sake!
Just tell us what's
happened! No! Why?
Because! Because what?
Because it's not
for me to say! Why?
Because! Because what?
Because he was
smearing shit on a van!
Whose shit? Uh
It was just some dog shit.
Whose van? My boss'.
Ah, Tom, no. They, uh
They let me go.
They fired me. Before
the dog shit thing.
Is this why you
came to see me, hm?
What, you went to see Mina?
Well She asked
me to visit you.
Oh, is
that why you?
Ah, I see. I see. Uh
Look, I admit, it hasn't
been the greatest few weeks.
And, uh, maybe I didn't
handle things as well as I
But I've had some time
to think now, and, er
We've moved on, Bernie.
We don't need this house.
We could, uh, sell up now,
and both of us come out
of it pretty all right.
Now, Ant's, er,
got some figures
Yep. So, er, in the current market,
you guys could sell this place,
split the cash, probably come
out with an apartment each.
An apartment?
Yeah, nice little
one-bed somewhere local.
So this is what my
life has come to?
A windowless one-bedroom
apartment? Huh!
Not Not windowless.
No, we-we can't stay
living like this, Bernie.
You know, we've worked
hard all our lives.
We're mortgage-free.
Well, almost, yeah. Almost?
Which is quite a privilege
when you think about it.
I've been meaning to tell you.
I re-mortgaged the house.
When? A few weeks ago.
For what?! This and that.
What?! "This and that"? What
are you saying, Bernie?!
Tom, if-if I might, erm
I found a little
pied-a-terre in the west, er,
between the mountains and the
sea. Very reasonably priced.
It would have been a
crime to let it go,
and I've, uh, taken
on a little mortgage.
Bernie has kindly
provided the deposit.
FINBAR CLEARS HIS THROA
It's where I'll
write my next book.
TOM YELLS
How could you do this?!
It's an investment! For who?!
If we could all
just calm down
You don't even know this man,
and you're buying him property.
I have a lot of experience
with conflict resolution.
First rule - stay in the room.
I'm not staying in
that fucking room!
Wha?
How did you re-mortgage
without my signature?
Did you forge it?
Look, Tom, the payments
aren't that much.
I can manage it. Jesus
Christ, Bernie! That's fraud!
Oh, don't be so hysterical.
Why did I bother calling
a family meeting?
Clearly, we only make unilateral
decisions around here.
Ant! Yeah?
Tell your boss to come
do that valuation.
Are you sure? Yes!
So, what? You're gonna
just go ahead with this?
Why not? You did.
Look
It's only 100 grand!
He'll pay it back now if
you're so upset. Won't you?
We're selling the house, Bernie.
You can do what you
want with your share.
I don't even know you any more.
I bought that.
DOOR SLAMS
Well, I hope you're
happy! Me?! What did I do?
You brought her back.
That woman! That witch!
She's the one putting
ideas into his head,
he was grand out there till now.
Mum, did you forge
Dad's signature?
What if I did? It's my house!
What the fuck?
FINBAR CLEARS HIS THROA
They made peace in Northern
Ireland. They'll make peace here.
MOBILE PHONE CHIMES
Shiv? Caroline, I
really have to go
I'll give you a lift. OK.
And it's not just the fact that she
blames me for literally everything,
it's the total self-absorption,
too, you know? Yeah.
Like, the lack of interest
in anyone else's life!
Shiv, there's something
that I And do you know,
not one person has asked me what
this interview is for? Shi
I, um
And I'm not saying that to
make you feel bad, by the way.
But, you know you haven't
asked me, either, so
How could she do that?
So you're definitely
up for this, yeah?
Cos if I go to my boss and
you change your mind, it's
I won't change my mind. Cos
I really need this, Dad.
I'm done.
I'm fucking done.
Thanks, Dad. You're amaze balls.
Eddie! Caught that fish.
I look at her, she looks at me
In her eyes, I see the sea
And I don't know
What she'd see in me. ♪
KNOCK ON DOOR
Cuppa? Sorry. I just
needed to think.
You don't need to explain.
I probably should have
said something to Tom.
Little white lie for
the greater good.
Totally understandable.
I'm going to the shops.
Do you need anything? No.
Have a soak in the
tub. Bit of me-time.
FINBAR: Text if you
think of anything!
DOOR SHUTS
OK, I accept not everybody
gives a shit about art.
Can you slow down?!
It's not like medicine is
so fucking riveting, either.
Shiv OK, it might
save a few more lives.
Oh. Will you shut the fuck up?!
I'm Shiv?
Oh, for God's sake!
Jack, wh? What
are you doing here?
I'm here for the interview.
What are you doing? Are
you here for the interview?
Erm, kinda, yeah. Right.
And what time is your? Can
you hold Stevie for a sec?
What? I'm just
bursting for a piss.
Oh, erm
What is he doing here? Wha?
He doesn't need this,
it's for emerging artists.
He's not emerging, he's emerged.
Unless he's on
the judging panel.
Oh, my God, he's on the
judging panel. Of course he is.
This is fucking typical!
He's on the fucking
CAROLINE SNIFFS
Why are you crying?
Oh, my God, you're
pregnant. Shh!
How far along?
Almost four months.
I only found out
the other week. I
I thought it was just
really bad indigestion.
Oh, Caroline
Is it Shane's?
Yes, it's Shane's! Of
course it's Shane's!
I'm like 84%
sure it's Shane's.
So you've told him?
Of course I haven't
told him! OK.
So, what are you gonna do?
Get rid of it, obviously.
Really? Yes.
You sure?
I've booked the flights, I'm
going Saturday, it's done.
I just needed to tell
someone in case
I don't know, something came up.
Do you think maybe you
need some more time?
This wasn't meant to happen,
Shiv. It's not on my timeline.
What the fuck am I supposed
to do with a fucking baby?!
There y'are!
Thought you'd kidnapped my kid.
Why's she crying?
Everywhere I go, women crying.
Hey, Max. Thanks for seeing me.
God, I'm I'm sorry,
Tom. That sounds awful.
So how How could
I? I need a lawyer.
Tom, I respect both
you and Bernie.
I don't think I should
I'm not trying to put you in
an awkward situation here, Max.
I'm not. It's just, you know,
I've always felt you and I have a
special connection, you know?
Anyway, I value your advice.
Yeah, well, divorce is
a nasty business, Tom.
My advice is, try
some mediation.
Ah, no, no! No mediation.
We're past that.
I need a shark.
Have you ever had an abortion?
Yeah.
When?
Five years ago. In London.
Do you ever regret it?
No.
Then I won't, either.
I'm a different person to you.
Look, I don't think anyone
should have to be a mother
if they don't want to be.
Life's hard enough without that.
Just make sure it is
what you want for you.
Not just cos it doesn't
fit into some timeline.
Siobhan Sheridan?
Good luck.
Dearbhla Shiv.
Didn't realise that was you.
Your leaflet
inspired me to apply.
Well it did
say YOUNG artists,
but never mind, the judges
liked you. Come on in.
Hello, Shiv.
Hi. This is Caroline Sheridan.
I've an appointment this weekend.
I'd like to push it back.
Just putting out the bins.
Hello.
So you call this A Cycle Of
Shame: Meditations On Addiction.
Can you talk about that? Sure.
I'm drawn to both the abstract
and figurative in my work,
so I've used harsh lines
and a repetition of
colour to evoke
Yes. But why shame as a theme?
Have you done something
to be ashamed of?
Well, the piece is
about addiction.
Yes, a brave choice
of subject matter,
given that it's such a cliche.
I'm an alcoholic.
I tried getting sober in my
early 30s and kept failing.
Last year, I was doing pretty
well, made it to six months
before I fell spectacularly
off the wagon.
I did some things
I'm not proud of.
We addicts drink to
get rid of our shame.
And then we do things
when we're drunk
that make us more ashamed,
so it kind of becomes
a vicious cycle.
And what about the things you
did when you were not drunk?
Are you ashamed of those, too?
Of course.
That's what I'm
exploring in this piece
how one can be sober
but still messy.
But aren't we sick of the
trope of the "messy" woman?
What about the women
who just get on with it?
Who have jobs and raise kids,
and aren't endlessly talking about
their problems or their pussies?
Well
would that make great art?
Is this great art?
I just don't think young
women relate to this any more.
They're bored by it.
I think it's easy to
be bored when you're 23
and you haven't
made any mistakes.
You know, come back
to me when you're 40
and your life's in the shitter.
If you ask me, women are owed
at least several more centuries
of "messy". I mean, Jesus,
we've had a millennia of just
being baby factories or whores.
So you consider
yourself a feminist?
Oh, yeah.
So would you consider it feminist
to, erm, accept a job from a woman
who is eight months pregnant,
and then fuck her
boyfriend behind her back?
Or would you simply put that
down to being "messy"?
Oh.
Apology Champagne. Oh?
Did you get my flowers
last week? I did.
I am really sorry about
what happened. Erm
Er, but I've got good news.
My folks are selling the house,
and I brought it to Eddie,
which means I'll be
getting commission,
which means I won't need
mates rates, which means
I'm ready. To move in.
Is it OK - I took your
washing out of the machine?
Yeah, yeah. Of course.
Er, Ant, you
remember Mikhail? Hi.
He's subletting Pete's room
for a couple of months.
Oh. OK.
It just seemed like, you
know, after everything, that
it might be better for us
to take it slow, you know?
Right, yeah. Yeah.
We're not in any rush.
God, no! No!
Sure. You were the one with
the foot on the accelerator.
Are these yours?
Oh, come on! Did they shrink?
Hey, give them! Give them to
me! Give them to me! Give
You're such a dick!
He's such a dick.
Yeah. Yeah, I can see that.
This feels firm to me. No,
this is not a proper melon.
Here, this one. OK.
Caroline! Hey, hi!
What are you doing here?
Fe-Feeling the-the melons
Hi, I'm Caroline Er,
this is Marie-Luisa.
We work together.
And I am his girlfriend.
Right. Wow.
And you're Spanish? Half
Spanish, half Portuguese.
Yes. Erm, I think Rory
might have mentioned you.
When did you mention me? Er,
are you having a party or?
Oh, no. Just sugar cravings.
Period?
Yep. Yeah.
Er, anyway Er, yeah.
It was nice seeing you,
Rory. Yeah, you too.
Why didn't you say I
was your girlfriend?!
Ow, Jesus! Argh!
Kristen? Yes?
I just wanted to say I'm
sorry for everything.
I know I've caused
you a lot of pain.
And I know you and Jack
aren't together any more.
And I feel terrible for the
part I played in Oh, please.
Don't make yourself more
important than you are.
It's not like you were the
only one. It was Christmas.
Apology not accepted.
Go fuck yourself.
Hey, Shiv. How'd it go?
Why didn't you tell me
she was on the panel?
I didn't wanna freak you out.
She tore me to pieces in there.
Fuck it! It's some shitty
little parochial bursary,
you don't need it.
Actually, Jack, yes, I do!
And by the way, that's
easy for you to say,
you weren't in there
being totally fucking
HE CHUCKLES What?!
You look great when
you're angry. HE CHUCKLES.
Oh, my God.
It doesn't matter
what they think!
WHISTLE
So how'd it go?
It was a total fucking
shit show. What?! No!
Is it something to do
with your ex being here?
No. God Were yis fighting?
He was just being himself.
It wasn't just my ex.
His ex was on the
panel, my boss.
So what's your news?
Your text this morning.
You said you had something
to Ah, it's not really
Oh, come on. It sounded important,
and I need a distraction.
Look, I I didn't
wanna do this here.
Erm
I've been offered
to go to Australia.
Australia? One of my
business partners,
his brother lives in Melbourne,
and he wants to open
a restaurant with us.
When? Soon.
And obviously, there's
some considerations
Yeah, like what?
Like you.
The fact that I'm
falling in love with you.
What do you think?
You wanna ride off into
the sunset with me?
Hey, baby, swing
for the fences
Whatever consequences
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again
I'm smiling like
an idiot again. ♪
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