Gilligan's Island (1964) s02e06 Episode Script

1
Just sit right back,
and you'll hear a tale ♪
a tale of a fateful trip ♪
that started from this tropic port ♪
aboard this tiny ship ♪
the mate was a mighty sailin' man ♪
the skipper brave and sure ♪
5 passengers set sail that day
for a 3-hour tour ♪
a 3-hour tour ♪
[thunder]
The weather started getting rough ♪
the tiny ship was tossed ♪
if not for the courage
of the fearless crew ♪
the minnow would be lost,
the minnow would be lost ♪
the ship set ground
on the shore of this ♪
uncharted desert isle ♪
with gilligan ♪
the skipper, too ♪
the millionaire and his wife ♪
the movie star ♪
the professor and Mary Ann ♪
here on gilligan's isle ♪
Well, there you are, gilligan. Ha ha!
How come you got up so early?
Oh, I wanted to get an early start,
catch something nice for
dinner, something you like.
Ah. The early bird catches the worm, eh?
You like worms?
Of course not.
I got a nice batch of lobsters,
but if you like worms
Gilligan, that's just an expression,
a way of saying something.
These are real beauties. Real fat, see?
Yes, aren't they, though? Well.
Aah! Aah! Gilligan, get
uhh! Uhh!
You can bite him back tonight.
Thanks a lot, gilligan.
I better get these over to the girls.
Yes, gilligan. Ooh
Hello, professor. Skipper.
Look at the nice lobster that
gilligan got for us for dinner.
The condemned will eat a hearty meal.
The condemned will eat a hearty
What do you mean? Look.
It's just a piece of wood.
It's a measuring stick.
I've been using it
to Mark the highest point
the water's reached on the island.
And I've been keeping
a very careful check.
The stick is almost underwater.
Exactly. And since there haven't
been any freak tides or storms,
there's only one possible conclusion.
Our island is sinking into the ocean.
Oh, no.
I've got to talk to you,
Mr. Howell. It's important.
Not as important as
this putt. It's for a birdie.
But, Mr. Howell
please, professor, you're
ruining my concentration.
This is the final hole of
the ho well $100,000 open.
Now, if I sink this putt, I'll win it.
That's what I want to
talk to you about sinking.
Just just watch the flag
when I putt and
[Mumbling]
There you go.
Aah! Ho ho! Drat it!
Drat it! I missed it!
Well, that means there'll
be a playoff with Mrs. Howell.
I believe in keeping the
money in the family, my boy.
Now, what did you say about sinking?
The island, Mr. Howell.
It's sinking into the ocean.
Oh, thank heavens!
For a minute I thought I
was losing my putting touch.
I thought everything
Sinking?!
Yes. Our island will soon
be covered with water.
Well, how am I going to
break the news to Mrs. Howell?
Well, it's bad news, indeed.
It certainly is. She'll
be furious. No playoff?
The island is sinking, Mr. Howell.
If the women know the
end is near, they'll panic.
Mr. Howell, we've got to be strong.
I'm sure gilligan
won't take this lying down.
Help! I'm drowning!
You're alright, little buddy. You're alright.
Now, you just fainted and I
revived you with a little water.
Oh, I'm sorry, skipper.
That's alright, little buddy.
What are we gonna do?
The first thing we must do
is remain calm and cool.
You won't get hysterical, will you?
Right. And you won't panic.
Right. And you won't be afraid.
Wrong.
2 out of 3's not bad, skipper.
Well, professor, have you
come up with anything yet?
I've been racking my brains,
but I don't see any way out.
I told gilligan to meet us here.
I don't know where he is.
Gilligan: Here I am, skipper.
Gilligan, what are you doing?
This is no time for games.
It's not a game, skipper.
When the water comes up,
we'll walk on stilts.
Gilligan, that's ridiculous.
And when the water gets
higher, we'll build higher stilts.
Professor, how high do you have to go
before you get a nosebleed?
Gilligan, you can get
a nosebleed right down here,
if you know what I mean.
What a stupid idea.
Wait a minute. Maybe it's not so stupid.
See?
Gilligan's idea is to stay
higher than the water.
And that's our best solution.
You mean we're gonna all be on stilts?
No, no, no, no. We find the
highest ground on the island
and build a new hut. That should
keep us safe as long as possible.
Good thinking, professor.
Well, gilligan should get the credit.
And by the way, you
better get down off there
before the women see
you and get suspicious.
I'll help you, gilligan.
Oh, there you are. I've been
looking for you everywh
oh, gilligan, what on earth
are you doing up on those stilts?
Stilts? What stilts?
Oh, these stilts.
Stilts? Uh w-well,
I tell you, Mrs. Howell,
gilligan has found a
new way to pick coconuts.
Haven't you, gilligan?
Oh, yeah. It's a great way.
Gets me real close to them.
Alright, gilligan.
Run along and start
picking some coconuts.
E-Easy, now.
Easy. Careful, gilligan.
The ground is soft over there.
Oh, yes.
Ohh
Whoa!
Whoa!
Ooh ooh aah
Hang on, gilligan!
Ohh
[Shouts]
Skipper: Gilligan!
I got one.
Uhh
Little buddy, did you hurt yourself?
Seems like quite a lot of work
to go to for one little coconut.
I'm okay, I guess.
Well, that's good, because
we need every available man.
Every available man?
Yes. We want you men to landscape
all the area outside the huts.
The uhh! Now?
Mrs. Howell: Immediately.
We girls are going to beautify the place,
because we may have to
stay here for a long, long time.
But we're not uhh
not what?
Uh uh not, uh
we're not against the idea, Mrs. Howell.
I mean, that's the very idea
we were thinking of,
wasn't it, professor?
Professor: Absolutely. Good.
Wasn't it, gilligan? That's right.
That's just what we
were thinking. Good boy.
You see, I didn't tell her about the
Boy, that's a big one, professor.
Well, thank you, ginger.
But believe me, the last thing
this island needs right now
is a rock garden.
But you will get me some more,
won't you, professor?
Well just how many more
do you think you're going to need?
Oh, I don't know.
About 20 or 30 or
I don't know.
[Grunts]
Can't you go any faster?
[Grunting]
I'm doing the best that I can.
Well, you'll have to do better, gilligan.
Remember, we've got to start
working that new hut
as soon as possible.
Well, when are we
gonna change positions?
I've been out in front for over an hour.
We're doing alright.
You made up the schedule.
For the first hour, you plow and I pull.
You're right. Okay, we'll switch.
Now, I'll plow and you pull.
That's better.
Thurston dear, wake up.
Thurston.
Oh, they're playing our song.
Shall we go back to work?
Oh, of course, my dear.
Uh uh uh, clippers.
Clippers.
Scissors.
Scissors.
Buffer.
Buffer.
[Sighs]
You almost through, professor?
Almost.
But we need more bamboo Poles.
Well, that's Mr. Howell's detail.
[Groans]
[Yawns]
[Thunk]
Mr. Howell, you just
dropped that bamboo pole
on your foot.
I know.
But you didn't yell.
I'm too tired. I'll yell tomorrow.
Mr. Howell, try to get some bigger Poles.
I don't know how we're gonna
build a hut at this rate.
Guess we haven't any choice.
That's true. We've got
to build the hut secretly,
and at night, or tell the
women about the island sinking.
[Yawning] And we can't do that.
Gilligan, you've accidentally
tied yourself to the pole.
It wasn't an accident, skipper.
It's the only way I can
keep from falling down.
I doubt that.
[Birds chirping]
Goodnight.
Come on, little buddy.
[Snoring]
Goodnight, gilligan.
Goodnight.
Good morning!
Everybody up. Time to go to work.
[Groaning]
Oh, I love decorating.
I'm a born decorator, you know.
When I saw the
ohh
Uhh.
How's that, Mrs. Howell?
I like it right here.
Um
No, I don't think that's right.
No, uh, we'll try it back there.
[Grunting]
There.
That's good.
But not quite good enough.
Uh, try it, uh,
try it in that spot.
See what I mean, gilligan?
Women don't know how
to make up their own minds.
I suppose you men could do better?
We certainly could, Mrs. Howell.
We could make up our minds.
Be my guest, gentlemen.
We think it looks fine right here.
Me, too.
On second thought, skipper,
maybe it'd look better up there.
Gilligan!
Ha ha.
See what you did, you
Skipper, can't we rest for a minute?
Okay.
We've been going like this for 48 hours
without any sleep.
Can't we just shut our
eyes and get 40 winks?
No, gilligan.
Can't we shut one eye and get 20 winks?
No, gilligan. We've gotta finish the job.
Now, come on. Let's go.
Ohh
I wonder where Mr. Howell is. He's late.
[Footsteps]
That sounds like him.
Is that you, Mr. Howell?
I'm sorry. I I dozed off.
I threw on the first thing I could find
and I came right over.
I don't know whether you
know it or not, Mr. Howell,
but I think you're wearing
your wife's bathrobe.
Oh, is that what it is?
I I thought my cashmere
jammies had unraveled.
It tickled my fancy.
Come on, Mr. Howell. We've
got to take these palm fronds
and make a wall.
Professor: Forget it, men.
Forget it?
I just checked the lagoon.
The water's twice as high as yesterday.
I wish I could teach my stocks to do that.
Well, but, this is the highest
ground on the island, professor.
We should be safe here.
The way the water's rising,
there's no ground
high enough to save us.
We'll be underwater in 5 days.
5 days?
Maybe 6.
Oh, thank goodness.
There's no use stalling any longer.
We've got to tell the women the truth.
They must know the island is sinking.
And the fact that there's
no hope for survival.
Sounds like a meeting
of the optimists club.
Who's gonna tell them?
Well, as your skipper,
I know that there's only one choice.
This unpleasant duty has
got to fall on only one man.
Mr. Howell.
Me?! You're the skipper.
It's your duty. But you're an executive.
You know how to handle these
matters in a businesslike way.
Well, that's different if you want
to handle it in a businesslike way.
Then you'll handle it?
Yes. I'll dictate a letter
and send it out in triplicate.
Oh, Mr. Howell, we
haven't got time for that.
Well, that lets me out.
I think I'll go down to the lagoon
and see if my money belt will float.
[Muttering]
Professor, you always
have a solution to everything.
What shall we do about this?
The direct approach.
A straight line is the shortest
distance between two points.
I guess it is.
I just saw ginger go into her hut.
The thing to do is to go
right in and tell her. Agreed?
Agreed.
Good. Then you tell her.
Me?! But
no buts, gilligan.
Go right in and talk to ginger.
The direct approach.
Okay, little buddy? Go ahead.
Yeah.
Ginger?
Oh. Hi, gilligan.
You're just in time.
What am I?
A girl.
No. I'm a tree.
I'm doing an acting exercise,
and I'm imagining that I'm a tree.
Oh, well, seeing as you're
busy, I'll come back later.
Maybe next summer
when the leaves are out.
Why aren't you out
working on the landscaping?
Oh, that's what I came to tell
you. We've stopped working.
But you promised.
Well, the reason we
stopped working is because
Well, because
We only have a few days
left on the island.
We have?!
Yeah.
W-Well, that's wonderful! It is?
Well, yeah. That means
you found a way off.
Well, yeah, we'll be kind
of off the island, alright.
Well, then we're saved! We're rescued!
Oh, gilligan, you made me so happy!
Mmm!
Hey, ginger. What?
Oh, nothing.
Oh, boy!
Oh, I'm getting off the
island. I can't believe it.
Oh, Hollywood, here I come. Ooh la la.
Professor.
I didn't think ginger would take it so hard.
Look at gilligan. It looks like
she punched him in the jaw.
What happened, little buddy?
Oh, she kissed me.
She kissed you?
For telling her that the island is sinking?
Gilligan, you were supposed
to take the direct approach.
I did. I tried to tell her
we're getting off the island,
and she got mixed up, and she
thinks we're being Rescued.
Rescued?
For goodness' sakes, can't
you ever be firm and strong?
Well
Eee!
Oh, skipper!
Isn't it wonderful?
Tell me, how do we get off the island?
Now's your chance,
skipper. Be firm and strong.
[Stammering]
Professor?
What about the professor?
W-Well, it's just that, um
The professor has got his
transmitter fixed, haven't you?
Ohh!
Why, yes, yes.
Now, uh
Now we can contact someone.
You mean we're in contact
with the outside world?
Oh, that's wonderful. Wait
till I tell the girls about it.
They'll be so happy. Ohh! Mmm!
Mmm!
Firm and strong.
Yes. Firm and strong.
Professor, this should
really pass for a transmitter.
We ought to be able to get by with it.
Hey, it looks real good, professor.
I bet the girls don't catch on.
As long as they don't
examine it too closely.
They'll be along here any minute now.
How does it work?
Well, first, gilligan,
you get under the table.
I what?
You get under the table,
and you sound like a radio announcer.
But I don't know how
to sound like an announcer.
Oh, certainly you can.
Mr. Howell: Ready or not, here we come!
There's Mr. Howell's signal.
But I don't know what to say.
Gilligan, just speak
when you're spoken to,
and try and use a different voice.
I can't. This is the only voice I have.
Get under there, will you?
Disguise your voice.
Oh, isn't this exciting?
We'll make headlines in every paper.
Thurston, it looks awfully primitive.
I do hope you haven't invested in it.
No. I have every confidence
here in the professor.
Where's gilligan?
Oh, he's around.
Give it a test, professor.
What kind of voice should I use?
Hello. Hello.
[Whistling like radio static]
It must be static.
'Ello.
Aha. We've made contact.
He sounds French. Oh!
He is. He's a French radio announcer.
Oh! I hope he can speak English.
Hello? Hello. This is Mary Ann.
'Ello.
This is Gill
[French pronunciation] Gilbert leblanche.
He comes in so clear,
as though he were close by.
Closer than you think.
We'll find out where he is.
Uh, tell me, what is your position?
My position?
I am sitting down,
my legs are crossed,
and it is very uncomfortable.
I I guess he's in one of
those cramped quarters,
you know, like a little ham radio shack?
Hello. I'm an actress.
Can you tell me what's
happening in Hollywood?
I mean, any gossip?
[French accent] Hollywood gossip?
Yeah. I haven't seen
a newspaper in ages.
Ah, oui.
The big gossip is, uh,
what well-known Hollywood star
was seen at a nightclub
with a well-known actress?
Oh, thank you.
I just love inside information.
There's something we must
find out before we're rescued.
This is Mrs. Thurston ho well III.
From Newport, New York, palm beach,
and, of course, Paris, mon chere.
Um, I want to ask you
about the new French fashions.
I don't know what to wear
when we're rescued.
Why don't you wear your blue dress?
My blue dress. Oh, that's perfect!
How does he know I have a blue dress?
Thurston, there's something
very peculiar going on here.
Ow! Ooh!
Gilligan.
Uh-oh. Heh heh.
It is sinking.
Well, I wish I'd learned to swim.
I know Survival. I never would have
professor: And that's why
we didn't tell you.
Yes. We thought you were gonna panic
if you knew that the island
was going underwater.
It's my duty to protect you.
After all, I'm the strong, stalwart male,
and you're the frail, helpless female.
[Baby talk] Yes, you
big, strong man, you.
Now, girls, time is getting short.
We must get organized. How
are we going to stay afloat?
Why don't we build an ark like Noah did?
Why, that's a wonderful idea.
We'll take the raft the men
started to build a couple months ago
and we'll put a new hut on it.
Excellent! Now, we must get going.
We have a million things to do.
Now, why didn't we think of that?
Lovey's so determined.
Now, when I pull on these vines,
it will cause the ark to rock up and down.
Oh.
We want to see if the ark's
gonna be safe in a rough sea.
What are you doing
with a life jacket on already?
Yes. The water won't be
up here for 3 days.
No sense in waiting till the last minute.
Skipper: All set, gilligan?
All set, skipper!
Ohhh!
Are you alright, little buddy?
[Groans]
Say something.
Skipper, I don't know
if I'm ready for this test.
I'm barely recovered from the other one.
Don't worry, gilligan.
All the furniture is secured to the floor.
It won't slide.
Alright, professor, we're
ready for the eating test!
Let her rock!
It's just a matter of timing, gilligan.
Skipper, maybe we should
nail the food to the table, huh?
I wish I could catch mine. I'm
working up quite an appetite.
When it goes by again,
I'll make a stab at it.
Uhh!
Ohh!
Aah
Sorry.
Gilligan
Maybe we'll do better at the drinking.
I'll get the coconut milk.
Do that.
Hang on to the table,
gilligan. That's right.
Alright. Say when. Ready?
When, gilligan.
And now, gilligan,
this will be the most
important of our tests,
being as we're
in our hammocks so much.
Yeah. We'll be too weak from
the lack of food to stand up.
Okay, professor!
How are you doing, gilligan?
Okay, skipper.
Hold on, little buddy.
I think the professor's
gonna rock us faster.
These hammocks work fine.
Ha ha ha ha!
Yes, gilligan.
I think we're going to make it.
Uh-huh, skipper.
From here on in, it
looks like smooth sailing.
Skipper! Gilligan! Are you alright?
[Sigh]
Smooth sailing.
Well, that does it.
Professor, it looks like the
captain's going down with his island.
Well, at least we have some
real nice fat lobsters for dinner.
Gilligan, where did you get that stick?
That old stick? I use it to keep
my lobster traps from floating away.
"That old stick"?
Well, it just happens to be the
measuring stick I've been using
to Mark how high the water's
been coming up on the island.
And I've been putting
it out in deeper water
to catch bigger lobsters.
Well, that explains everything.
The island isn't sinking at all.
Gilligan, look at that mess.
And it's all your fault.
Oh, well, skipper, it won't take very long
when all three of us
pitch in to clean it up.
All three of us?
All three of us?
Yeah.
Me, myself, and I.
Exactly.
They're here for a long, long time ♪
they'll have to make the best of things ♪
it's an uphill climb ♪
the first mate and his skipper, too ♪
will do their very best ♪
to make the others comfortable ♪
in their tropic island nest ♪
no phone ♪no light ♪
no motor cars, not a single luxury ♪
like Robinson crusoe ♪
it's primitive as can be ♪
so join us here each week, my friends ♪
you're sure to get a smile ♪
from 7 stranded castaways ♪
here on gilligan's isle ♪