The Incredible Hulk (1996) s02e06 Episode Script

Hollywood Rocks

1
Radio Dj: Oh, Yeah.
They're Out There,
People.
Big Bad Asteroids
Crowdin' Our Space.
But Chill And Be Still,
'Cause These
Heavenly Bodies
Will Just Burn Up
In Our Atmosphere
If They Get
Too Darn Close.
And For Those Of Us
Burnin' Up In So Cal,
We Got Our Own Hot Rock
Blazin' Through
The Airwaves,
Comin' Right At You
From Khlk Radio,
Holly-Weird.
Hyah!
I--I Can't
Believe It!
3 Olympic
Gold Medalists
And We Got Aced
By One Woman.
Not Just
Any Woman,
Boys.
The Woman
Otherwise
Known As
She-Hulk.
Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Later, Guys.
I'm Off To Rip
A Curl Or Two.
Yee-Hah!
Dj:
But Just In Case,
Sky-Watchers,
Keep Your Peepers
Peepin' Tonight
For One Slash-And-Burn
Meteor Light Show.
Dr. Ferguson:
Bruce!
The Asteroid
Is Approaching.
The Descent
Is Stabilized.
We're Locked On.
Increasing Gamma Emissions
And Initiating
The Repelling Beam.
Yay!
Yay!
Ha Ha!
Very Good,
Gentlemen!
Fantastic!
Cheers, Dr. Ferguson.
Good Work.
Oh, Hardly.
The Thanks Goes To You,
Bruce, Old Man.
If Not For Your Expertise
In Gamma Energy,
We Never Could've
Solved The Problems
With This Repelling-Beam
Generator In Time.
Well, We'd Better
Get Moving On
The New Modifications.
Those Asteroids
Are Getting Closer.
You're Right.
If The Public Only Knew
What Kind Of Danger
We're Really In.
[Gasp]
What's That?
Ohh!
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Aah!
Lab Secured.
Very Good.
Now, Take Everything
That Isn't Nailed Down
For It Now Belongs
To Dr. Doom,
And By The End
Of This Day,
I Shall Have
My Long-Awaited
Retribution.
Latveria Will Be
Under My Rule Again,
And Those
Who Have Crossed Me
Will Suffer.
Including You,
Dr. Banner.
Blow This Place
Into Tiny Pieces.
Rrraaahhh!
Hulk ♪
Hulk ♪
Incredible Hulk ♪
Hulk ♪
Hulk ♪
Incredible Hulk ♪
Hulk ♪
Incredible Hulk ♪
Rrraaahhh!
[Gasp]
Grrr!
Where Ugly Gray Hulk?
Who You Calling Ugly?
Unh!
This Puny Head
Ain't Big Enough
For The Both Of Us!
You Head Out!
Oorghh!
Grraaahh!
Arrrh!
[Straining]
Hulk.
What A Surprise.
I Hadn't Expected
A Visit From You.
Well, Not Yet,
Anyway.
Dr. Dumb
Hulk Enemy.
Oh, You Don't Know
How Right You Are.
And It's "Doom,"
You Tiresome Savage!
The Hulk And I
Shall Meet Again
Sooner Than He May Think.
[Beeping]
Wha--Beep? Beep?
Rowrrrr!
Rowrrrr
Rr-Whew!
Oh, Come On,
Brucie, Where Are You?
Hmm
[Cell Phone Ringing]
BeepBeep
Beep Beep?
Go Boom Boom!
Rowrrr!
That Cousin Of Mine
Is Working Way Too Hard.
Well, This Gamma Girl
Is Having A Blast
Making Her Mark
In Tinseltown.
Madonna,
Eat Your Heart Out.
[Honk, Tires Squeal]
Now There's A Bad Noise.
Uh-Oh. Bad Scene, Too.
Oh!!
Man: Cut. Cut. Cut!
All Right,
What's With
The Green Babe
In My Shot?
Let's Go For
Take 2, People,
And Get Lady Liberty
Off My Set.
[Male Voice]
Hey, Radical Stunt,
But This Is
A Union Show,
So Back Off.
All Right, Let's Try
A Little More Blush
This Time, Ok?
Man: Hello,
Tall And Lean.
You Know,
Crashing A Movie Set
Really Isn't
The Way To Break
Into Showbiz, Babe.
Huh?
But You Definitely Got
Yourself Noticed,
Green Body Paint
And All. Ha Ha Ha!
Hi. Rance De Lancie
From Colossal
Studios.
Get Over Yourself!
The Famous Director?
I Love Your Old Movies.
Queen Kong,
Castablanket,
Oh, And That Shark Flick
Gone With The Fin.
Whatever
Happened To You?
Uh, Television.
But Enough About Me.
How Would You
Like To Star
In My Newest
Tv Pilot?
We're Shooting
Today.
Get Out Of Here!
Yowp!
Oh, Sorry.
Where Do I Sign?
All Right.
Places, Everyone.
Hey, Has Anyone
Seen She-Hulk?
Hyah!
Yaah!
Huh!
Unh!
I Am Greena,
Warrior Princess!
Ooh, Was I Made For
This Part, Or What?
Ok, Ok. She-Hulk,
Baby Doll,
What I'm Looking For
In This Scene
Is Honest Heroism,
Ok? Ok? Ok?
Powerful, Yet Vulnerable.
Strong, Yet Sensitive.
Tall, Yet--
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.
Got It.
Jeez. It Always Goes
Right To Their Heads.
And
Action!
Forsooth!
I'll Vanquish You
Yet, Hekubah!
Unh!
And I'll Do It
By Slicing The Heart
From Your Evil Machine
Of Destruction.
Rance: Ok,
Strike The Set.
We're Finished Here.
Very Moving Performance,
My Lovely She-Hulk.
Our Cameras
At The Studio Back Lot
Will Film
Your Heroic Descent.
And Then I Just
Hand This Thingie
Over To Herculip,
Right?
Bingo, Babe!
Love Ya. Mean It.
10-4. Rance Out. Ha Ha!
Ah, It's Too Bad
Brucie's Missing
My High-Flying
Star Trip.
She-Hulk: Yee-Hah!
Jennifer?
Flying?
Dj: Well, Hollyweirdos,
Seems That Asteroid Belt
Is Just Movin' On By
In The Old Sky,
So How About We Roll
Some Rock Of Our Own, Huh?
[Rock Music Plays]
Hellooo, Herky Baby,
Here's The
Hey
This Place
Is Abandoned.
Wha--?
Cut. Print.
And That's A Wrap.
Especially For You,
My Dear Leading Lady.
Doom.
Oh, Yes.
I Have Returned.
You See, Today
Is My Sequel,
And As For You
Well, Let's Just Say
You'll End Up On
The Cutting Room Floor.
[Gasp]
Doom.
Smile At The Camera.
Get That Laser
Out Of My Face,
Tin Brain.
Hyah!
Oh, Don't Fret.
This Is Simply A Stun Ray.
It'll Only Hurt
For A Moment.
UhWrong.
Didn'tFeel
A Thing
Ohh
Doom: Take Her
To The Sound Stage.
Rowrrr!
Tire Him Out.
Subdue Him.
Then Bring Him
To Me.
Hulk The Bomb!
Grr! Stinking
Metal Men! Grr!
Eat Tree!
Yeah! Smash At Last!
Harrhh!
[Grunting]
Dr. Ferguson: Dr. Doom,
The Radiation Conductor
Has Been Installed,
And We Now Have
Added Tractor Beam
Capabilities.
[Straining]
This WasAll A Setup?
Charmingly
Manipulative,
Wasn't It?
A Film Crew Was
The Perfect Ruse
To Gain Entry
Into The Gamma
Reactor
For The One
Component
I Needed.
The Fact That You Brought
Me The Radiation Conductor
Was Quite Simply
Worth Every Penny
Of This Production.
And What Did He Mean
By Tractor Beam?
Let's Just Say Your Cousin's
Repelling-Beam Generator
Now Has A Dual Purpose.
Instead Of Just Pushing
Meteors Away
It Can Also Pull Them Down
To Fall Where I
Command Them To.
How's That
For A Blockbuster Event?
Show Me The Satellite View
Of The Target Areas.
One Unpopulated Island,
One Deserted Ghost Town,
And One Closed Ski Resort.
Perfect Places For
Tapping The World
On Its Shoulder.
And Now
Showtime.
Members Of
The United League
Of Countries,
Thank You
For Waiting.
You'll Remember Me
As Victor Von Doom,
The Deposed Leader
Of Latveria.
Withdraw Occupying Forces
Immediately,
Or I Shall Take
My Pound Of Flesh
One Landmass At A Time.
For Example
Meet My Demands
Or The Next Targets
Will Necessitate
Major Changes
In The World Atlas.
Unh! Is Your Brain
Starting To Rust?
You Have Yourself To Thank
For Setting
This Disaster Film
Into Motion,
My Young Starlet.
No Way, Sprocket Face.
This Is Your Tour-De-Force.
After My Defeat
In Washington
By You And That
Half-Witted Hulk,
I Lost Everything!
Today, However,
I Take It All Back,
With Vengeance!
Dr. Ferguson,
Prepare
The Launch Capsule.
As Ordered,
Dr. Doom.
Dr. Ferguson,
Fight Doom's Mind Control!
Don't Do This!
Repelling Beam Has
Been Reactivated.
And Now,
I Hereby Exact
My Revenge
Upon The Incredible Hulk!
Where Hulk?
Doom On Radio:
Oh, Good.
You're Awake.
I Want You
Fully Aware Of
Your Impending Doom,
My Hopeless Brute,
Because, In Moments,
You'll
Be Nothing More
Than A Solar Flare.
So I've Supplied
Your Helmet
With Just Enough
Oxygen To Assure
That You See
Your Fate Coming.
Unh! You're
A Sick Puppy, Doom!
Your Future,
On The Other Hand,
Will Not Be
Quite As Bright
As The Hulk's.
Once I Get Word
Latveria Has Been
Returned To Me,
You'll Take Up
Permanent Residence
There
As A Mine Laborer.
OohSweet Talk
Will Get You Nowhere,
But A Great Pair
Of Legs--
Hyah!
Ungghh!
Will Set Me Free!
Hyah!
Uhh
Ohh
Oh?
Ohh!
What's Going On?
Where Are We?
Time To Rewrite
The Script, Doomsy.
Destroy Her!
Ee-Yah!
Shake Out
The Cobwebs, Fellas,
We're In
A Situation Green!
You'll Pay
For This, Woman!
Destroy Her!
Oh!
Engage! Now!
Hit The Stars!
[Hulk Growling]
Hulk Need Air.
Use The Tractor Beam
To Haul That Asteroid
Back Into Orbit
While I Settle
A Score With Dr. Gone.
He's Out Of Range.
Huh? No!
Bruce!
Grraaaah
GrrHulkToo Hot!
Grrowwrr!
There He Is!
He's Still Out Of Range.
One More Asteroid
And We've Got Him.
One More
Is All We Got.
Keep Jumping,
Hulkster,
You're Almost There.
We've Got Him!
Tractor Beam
Is Locked On!
We'll Drop It
In The Ocean
Off The Coast.
Stay Put, Big Green,
We're Towing You In.
[Hulk Gasping
On Radio]
Jennifer
[Gasps]
HulkNo Breath
Oh, No! He's
Running Out Of Air!
[Explosion]
This Movie Isn't Over
Until I Roll
The End Credits.
House Lights
Up!
Whoa
Whoa
Whoa
Unh!
Unh!
Unh!
Doom: To Be Continued,
She-Hulk!
Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Ha Ha Ha Ha!
WaitWait!
Trajectory
Remains Constant.
He's Still Coming Down!
Ok, Hulk,
It's Up To You.
Just Hold Your Breath
And Hang On!
OohUhUh
Aah!
UhrUhrArrgh!
Pilot: Meteor
In Visual Range.
It Appears To Be
Headed Out To Sea.
What The
Huh?
Bruce!
Oh, No,
You Don't, Brucie.
The Hulk Brought You
This Far.
You're Not Giving Up Now.
[Coughing]
Jenn?
Wh-What Happened?
Wh-Why Are We
[Coughs]
Out In The Ocean?
Because You Had Yourself
One Hulking, Old-Fashioned
Splashdown, Cousin.
Best Of Luck, Bruce.
You Can Count On Us
To Keep That
Hulk Matter
To Ourselves, Eh?
Thank You.
I'll Be In Touch.
Rance: Whoa!
There You Are, She-Baby!
Look At Me, I'm Frantic!
Hey, I Had No Idea
What Dr. Doom
Was Up To,
Plus He Went
And Stiffed Me On
My Director's Fee.
Gee, Bruce, Do
You Hear Something?
Oh, I Know.
It's The Sound
Of Me Not Giving
A Rat's Butt.
Ah, Ha Ha Ha!
Uh, Wait, Wait, Wait,
Please, Please,
Ok, Ok, Ok.
The Networks
Loved The Footage
Of Greena,
Warrior Princess.
I Could Just Avoid
Scandal And Bankruptcy
If You'll Sign
This Tv Contract.
This'll Save
Your Smarmy Hide,
Huh?
Oh, Ha Ha!
Would It Ever!
And Bruce Here Can
Even Play Herculip.
Ha Ha! What A Great
You'll Be, Huh?
Hey, We're Already
A Great Team.
So, Let Me Negotiate
Our Terms With You.
Aargg! Akk!
She-Hulk:
Ha Ha Ha Ha!
There.
Any Questions?
[Through Paper]
UhNo
Ptui!
[Coughs]
It Always Goes
Right To Their Heads.
SoYou Think
We Got Time
For Me To Go
To Rodeo?
Wow. Is There
A Rodeo In Town?
Hello, Brucie!
Rodeo,
Beverly Hills?
I Got To Shop
Till I Drop.
Chanel, GucciOh!
Let's Go!
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