Palm Royale (2024) s02e10 Episode Script

1
[person whistling]
[grunting]
[Norma] Many people, if asked,
would tell you that
great fortunes are built from luck.
[screams]
[gasps] Uncle Beauregard.
[Norma] But I can personally attest
that great fortunes
come from misfortune.
Somebody! Help!
["The Entertainer" playing on piano]
[Norma]
After each untimely Dellacorte death,
my stake in the family fortune grew.
[discordant piano]
[Norma] And grew.
And grew.
[piano resumes]
[Norma] And contrary to current mythology,
which has me collecting trophies
from my victims,
what I was actually doing
was collecting keepsakes of those I loved.
- [footsteps approach]
- [Norma] Tokens of gratitude
to those whose misfortune
made my fortunate life possible.
"Why me?"
I would ask no one in particular.
Why are some chosen to live a lucky life
while others' lives are cut so short?
[baby crying]
I stopped asking these questions
once I learned
good fortune doesn't protect a woman
from the world's condemnation.
One pays with the currency
of one's very soul.
'Course, as one gathers life experience,
one also realizes once gained,
a fortune must be protected.
No matter the person.
No matter how meek, moral or magnanimous.
All eventually learn the art
of safeguarding our luck.
[Maxine screams]
[gunshot]
[music ends]
- [breathes shakily]
- [coughs]
[pants] Oh, my God. [exhales deeply]
Maxine.
[breathing shakily] What have I done?
He was an inch away from snapping my neck.
[pants] You… You saved my life.
[Maxine breathing shakily]
No.
- What are we gonna do?
- Okay.
Maybe we should be asking
the timeworn question.
"What would Norma do?"
- [breathes shakily]
- Maxine!
- [gasps] Yes. Okay.
- Snap out of it.
This is a moment for action.
What would Norma do?
[stammers] She would get rid of the body
before Douglas's wedding tonight.
Yes. Attagirl. That's good.
Okay, let me… let me lock the door.
Maxine, stay with me.
Two things are clear.
Mitzi can never know this happened,
and Douglas can never know
that baby wasn't his.
Because if either one of them
finds out either one of those things,
they will call the wedding off.
Maxine?
Yes.
Okay. [stutters] I'm here.
I'm here.
- Roger dodger.
- Okay, that's my girl.
- Okay.
- Okay. Let's get this pig in a blanket.
Okay. [breathes shakily]
- Okay. Over here.
- H-Here. I'll… I'll roll him to you.
- Okay.
- Right here.
- [grunts] That's it. Okay.
- Okay.
- So, I just…
- [grunts]
What do I do?
I just… I just plead self-defense?
- [breathes shakily] Oh, Evelyn.
- No. Maxine.
- Yes?
- You are absolutely not a murderer.
There is no stain on your soul.
But as witness to what happened to Linda,
we should all know better how the
legal system treats women in this town.
Or anywhere really.
- Right. Right. Okay.
- Okay? All right.
- Let's… Here, I'll cover his head…
- [groans]
- …and you get his feet. [grunting]
- Okay. [grunting]
- Okay. You got it?
- Okay. Just… Yeah.
[grunts]
- [groans] Whoa.
- Oh. Are you okay?
- Yes, I'm good. I'm okay. Let's get him.
- Okay.
- [Evelyn] All right. [grunts]
- Be careful. Okay.
- [grunts]
- Swing him around.
- [Maxine] Swing him? Okay. I'll lift him.
- [grunting]
[Maxine grunting]
[stammers] Wait, w-w-w-w-wait.
- Okay, breathe.
- [pants] Where're we gonna hide him?
I don't know.
Somewhere where no one can find him.
- Gee.
- Wait a second.
He was a, um…
an alligator sommelier, right?
- Fang and Tail. They've got a gator pond.
- Yes.
Oh, they'll gobble him down for good.
Oh, they'll love that revenge!
- [laughs] Okay.
- Great. Okay.
[both grunting]
Okay. [grunts]
- Oh! Okay.
- Oh.
[both grunting]
Let's stuff him in the dumbwaiter
and drag him to my car…
- Oh, great. Oh, perfect!
- …and then to the Fang.
Oh, but wait. [pants]
Evelyn, you drive a Corvette.
Oh, my God. That's right.
That's way too small. Um…
Through the tunnel.
Norma's Rolls-Royce at the Dellacorte.
It's got a trunk as big as a Frigidaire!
- Brilliant. Okay.
- Let's go. Okay.
[grunting] Oh, God.
- Help me pull on this side.
- Okay.
[both grunting, panting]
- One, two, three.
- [both grunting, panting]
[Evelyn] One, two, three.
- Okay, whoa! [exclaims]
- [yelps] Oh, be careful.
- Okay. [sighs]
- [sighs]
- Okay. Okay, let me get this side.
- Let's get this open.
- One…
- [both] Two, three… [grunts]
- And heave and ho.
- [grunting]
[both grunting]
[knocks on door]
[Eddie] Evelyn? Why is the door locked?
- It's Eddie.
- What are we gonna do?
- Oh, my God. Hide.
- Hmm. I gotta hide somewhere.
- Oh. Here, here. Get in here. Go!
- What? Ow, Evelyn.
- Get in. Get in, quickly.
- Ow. [grunts]
[gasps] Ew. [gasps]
[Evelyn] I'm coming.
[knocks on door]
Why was the door locked?
[panting] Uh, because I'm alone.
Evelyn.
I may have judged you too harshly.
- And, um…
- [Maxine grunts]
I'm willing to work things out with you
if you swear to me
that things are over with Jed.
[gasps]
Oh, i-it's over all right.
I can guarantee you
that nothing… [chuckles]
…will ever happen ever again.
[whispering] She's not wrong.
- He's here now, isn't he?
- Oh, don't be irrational.
Where are you? Huh?
[scoffs] He is not here,
and he never will be here again!
[whispering] That's not a lie. Sorry.
Evelyn, this relationship…
[sighs]
…it makes me feel insecure.
You know so much more about the world.
[stammers] You're so much
more sophisticated, you're…
- [whispering] It's 'cause she's older.
- You're…
Say it. Older.
[whispering] See?
It's clear you and I are due
a larger conversation,
but at the moment… [sighs]
…I have so much to do before the wedding.
Like get rid of a dead body.
- If you could just go now…
- Wait.
…and we will talk about this later.
- Evelyn.
- I've got so much to do.
Please, please, believe me.
We'll talk later.
- [door closes]
- [footsteps approaching]
[gasps]
[panting]
You had sex with a waiter
in the dumbwaiter?
- [stammers] We had a dalliance.
- A what?
- We fucked.
- Oh.
All right, let's get him down to the…
Let's get him down.
- Then we'll run down to the…
- Basement.
- …basement and meet him there.
- Hold him nice.
[Dinah] Well, here goes nothing.
This is probably the last time
I can show my face in public
- before that deranged egg maniac…
- [sighs]
…Madge Post brands me
as Nixon's whore forever.
What are you doing?
Well, I'm sharpening my antlers.
Happy to talk to her if you want.
[Dinah] No. Are you coming?
I have to get the groom's cake
to the caterers.
And then you have to drop me off at
the Dellacorte so I can help Mitzi dress.
No can do, babe.
You're on your own.
I got the golden ticket.
The International Order of the Stag
is giving me an award.
Yeah, I have to show up today
at 4 o'clock at the Shiny Sheet.
They're gonna take my picture.
You're missing your best friend's wedding
so you can have your photo taken?
[Perry] Doug-a-boo would want this for me.
Why can't I have anything for myself?
Dinah, d…
Do you even love me anymore?
I have to get the cake to the Palm.
[clicks teeth] Blind item:
which Palm Beach socialite is rumored
to be a mole for the Soviet government?
We've seen it too.
Rumor has it ole J. Edgar's
none too happy.
Someone could help him.
If he returns the favor.
Just, what are we talking about here?
Our boss.
Yes, the rumors are true.
We moonlight with the Russians
when our interests align.
The Mole wants a meeting.
- Where?
- [Raquel] Not so fast.
We only spill our Cuban beans
if we get immunity.
That could be arranged.
The Mole wants to meet star reporter
Ann Holiday at the Shiny Sheet today.
4:00 p.m. sharp.
He wants to tell his side of the story.
Instead, we are telling you.
[agent speaks Spanish]
Our blind item worked
beyond our wildest dreams.
And now I am going to get
the scoop of a lifetime.
No, you are not.
Look, I'm going
to meet this mole by myself.
I promise, you'll get your interview
from his jail cell.
But I'm sorry, Ann.
I can't let you nowhere
near the Shiny Sheet today.
[Evelyn] As I recall, I did in fact
mention there was a dalliance,
I just didn't specify who it was.
Well, I can't say that I'm happy
that one of my best gal pals
would withhold such a secret.
[Mary] Bootlegger?
- Ooh, hello?
- [Maxine] What is it?
- There's someone there.
- What? Oh!
Here, quick. Uh, uh.
[stammers] Put some of this stuff on him.
Cover up the body. Quick.
- Who's down there?
- This isn't really big enough.
Okay, good. It looks
like we're setting a table.
- [Mary] It wasn't me.
- [Maxine, Evelyn yelp]
- Mary.
- Mary.
[sighs] Wha-What wasn't you?
I heard kerfuffling and gunshots.
[scoffs] What're you talking about?
[stammers]
I didn't hear anyone get shot in the back.
Ow.
[scoffs]
[stammers]
I, uh…
I fear that I've lost my bootlegger.
- Oh.
- I broke the Davidsoul orb…
- Oh.
- …over his skull.
And so he abandoned me.
And if I find him,
I'm going to kill him.
I'm furious.
And furiously in love.
I have an idea.
Why don't you just hand this
over to me and…
maybe instead, you can just yell at him.
Your boyfriend.
[Mary] Maybe that's my fate.
To wander these hallowed hallways.
Forever in search of my lost love.
[gasps]
I've become a Brontë novel.
[chuckles] What a fate.
[Evelyn] Gosh, that may be, Mary.
But in a few days, when you decide
that's actually not the case,
God willing, the pool will soon be open
- at the Palm Royale.
- Yeah.
And you can take in some vitamin D.
Which you need.
[singsongy] Oh, bootlegger.
Bootlegger.
[Evelyn] It worked.
She didn't notice a thing. Perfect.
- [Maxine] It's a great cover-up.
- Oh, this way.
- Oh, this way? Feet first?
- Yep. Come on.
Feet first. [grunts]
[sighs] Okay.
Okay. I'll be right back.
Wait a second. [gasps]
What?
Did… Did Mary say she hit the bootlegger
over the head with the orb?
Yes, she said that. Why?
[gasps]
- Jed is the bootlegger.
- [gasps]
He's been behind all this.
Running around these tunnels,
fooling Mary,
working all the women in town,
sending messages to Mitzi.
Oh, my gosh, it all makes sense.
- Oh, no. No, no, no.
- What is it?
I think I just realized I shared a lover
with Mitzi and Ma…
Mary.
Oh.
- Well, you know what that means?
- What?
You three are Eskimo Sisters. For life.
I've never heard that expression before,
but I can intuit what it means,
and I feel like throwing up.
I believe the word is Inuit.
- [groans]
- [sighs]
I know Eddie is upset with you,
and that's gotta be hard.
But I really think he'll forgive you…
'cause I really believe he loves you.
And that is rare in this town, believe me.
So, no matter what happens,
consider yourself one of the lucky ones.
You know what's funny, Maxine,
and frankly very telling?
No one ever said Eddie was the lucky one.
Not once.
[sighs]
I was so caught up in all the things
I thought I needed to do to hold onto him.
As if I were unworthy.
And the more I think about it,
the more my, if I believed in psychology,
the more my subconscious motivations
for sleeping with Jed
are becoming very clear.
Clear how?
Just go upstairs and get the keys
to the Rolls so we can get this over with.
- Yes. Lot to process.
- Go.
[grunting] Okay, coast is clear.
[doorbell rings]
Never mind.
Can I come in?
[footsteps approaching]
The FBI is here.
[Evelyn] What?
How could he have found out already?
[shushes]
[Robert] You disappeared.
I'm sorry. I had to save my marriage.
But why are you here now?
Hoover had the offices bugged,
and got us both on tape.
- [gasping]
- Well… in the act.
I'm to do as they say, or I'll be exposed.
"As they say?" What do you mean?
[stammers] Do what?
I have orders to show up today
at the Shiny Sheet at 4:00.
[sighs]
They're…
They're shoot-to-kill orders.
- Okay, good news. It's not about us.
- [Tom] Do I look like the kind of person
- who could assassinate in cold blood?
- Bad news is Tom has to kill someone.
[Robert] There is another way.
Be free.
My kids.
They will love you as you are.
I guarantee that.
Kiss me. [sighing]
[Evelyn]
Who the hell is gonna get killed today?
[scoffs] The question is,
who else is gonna get killed?
- [Evelyn] Oh. Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, remember?
[breathing deeply] I have to go.
[sighs]
Rafael? Are you ready?
We're gonna be late.
[Evelyn] Who the hell's Rafael?
It's Robert's son.
- [chuckles] He reached out.
- [gasps]
- [Evelyn stammers] Robert has a son?
- Yes, I'll explain. Come on.
Rafi?
[Maxine] So, before Robert
embraced being a momo,
- he had a kid in Puerto Rico.
- [grunts] Gosh.
Yeah, he… he left there
and came here for… reasons.
And a big story came out,
and Robert's face is all over the papers.
Rafi tracked him down, and then,
well, they became reunited.
- [grunts] That's so touching.
- I know.
[Robert] Rafi, we gotta go. We're late.
- Uh… The bar, bar. The bar.
- The bar? Okay.
[both grunting]
- [thud]
- [Evelyn pants]
- Um…
- I have classic peanut, cashew,
and this, my friend, is a filbert.
That is so interesting. Thank you, Evelyn.
- Oh, hello, Robert.
- Hi, ladies. What are you up to?
Nothing. We just came by to…
- borrow the Rolls.
- Mm-hmm.
- To, um…
- Mm-hmm.
Decorate it for the, uh,
th-the happy couple. [chuckles]
No problem, I can take Rafi
to court in my Vespa.
He's here. [chuckling]
[Maxine gasps]
- [Robert] Ah, there you are. [laughs]
- [Maxine] Oh, my goodness.
Here he is. Oh, my goodness.
He looks just like you.
[chuckling]
Welcome. Oh, I-I'm Maxine. [chuckles]
- Hi.
- Oh. This is Evelyn.
- Charmed. [chuckles]
- Hello. [chuckles]
I-I'm so sorry,
you said you're going to court?
Yep. To ask that I get custody.
So he can move to Palm Beach,
finish high school here,
spend some time with me so we can
get to know each other a little better.
My mother will be upset,
but I hate the man she married.
He's always screaming at me.
"Be a man, Rafael. Toughen up, Rafael."
Well, I think it is wonderful that you are
here getting to know your dad. [chuckles]
You know, I never had the opportunity
to get to know my alcoholic…
Eskimo Sister.
- Do you happen to know what an Eskimo…
- Maxine, they have to get going.
And we have things to do too, don't we?
- Yes.
- Have you ever ridden a Vespa?
- [chuckles] No.
- It's so cool. We gotta go.
We're gonna have so much fun.
And the day is perfect. Come on, let's go.
- Bye, ladies.
- [both] Bye.
- Bye-bye. [chuckles]
- [Maxine] Bye.
[sighs] Cute.
So cute.
[Maxine] Okay, listen,
will you tell me wh-what's become clear,
or why you…
[clears throat] …with, uh, him.
I will tell you while we get this body
to the Rolls.
- Okay. Okay.
- But we gotta multitask.
- Okay. Okay.
- [grunts]
Even though my time
with Eddie was fulfilling
a-and affirming in many ways, I…
I may not need him.
Are you saying you can
conceive of existing
without having a husband
or being in pursuit of a husband?
I hate to admit it,
but apparently I have feelings
that just happen to align themselves
with the thing they call…
[stammers, scoffs]
- …feminism.
- Oh.
- And if you tell anyone I used that word…
- No! I…
- Your secret is safe with me. [grunts]
- All right.
Let's feed this fucker to the alligators.
- [door closes]
- [both gasp]
- [Mitzi crying]
- [sighs] Mitzi.
Oh, for God's sake.
- Over here.
- Yes.
[both grunting]
[Maxine sighs]
[Mitzi] Evelyn, you're okay.
Oh, thank God.
I was so sure Jed was gonna hurt you.
What? No… [chuckles] …I'm alive,
and… and we all are alive.
For now. But he could do anything.
He won't.
- You don't know that.
- Mmm.
- I do. [chuckles]
- [chuckles]
B-Because we… reached out to
our friend Virginia at the FBI
and told her we think that Jed was the…
is the killer of my twin sister.
And so, she put out an APB on him,
and apparently,
he found out and fled town forever.
Right. So you never have to worry
about seeing Jed ever again.
[doorbell rings]
Yoo-hoo. Hello!
Maid of honor calling! [sighs]
Oh, good! Tears!
It is not a real wedding
if you are not sobbing with regret
and loathing on the big day, my darling.
[sniffs]
Does it smell like dead body?
[both] No.
Uh, would you mind taking Mitzi
upstairs and helping her get ready?
Are you ready? Come on.
Come on.
Let's get you poured
into a wedding dress. Come on.
Turn that frown upside-down.
[Evelyn] Okay.
We've gotta hurry. The wedding's at 5:00.
- Okay.
- Nope, I'm driving. You're a wreck.
Oh, hi, ladies.
- Hi, Douglas. Goodbye, Douglas.
- Douglas.
Wow.
You're looking awfully well.
I'm feeling surprisingly great,
except for this… [inhales sharply]
…this annoying rash.
Oh, Max, remember
how I always used to tell you
that whenever
I took aspirin I'd get this rash?
Yeah, we don't have time for
a shaggy-dog story, we have to get going.
Well, apparently, I am allergic.
Here's the irony,
that I'm supposed
to take large quantities of aspirin
in order to counteract this, uh…
- this heart condition I have…
- Oh, you don't say.
…which is genetic.
It's killed all the Dellacorte men early.
- Isn't that amazing?
- Fascinating. Let's go.
Listen, um, we'll see you
at your wedding. Okay?
- I gotta…
- Oh, yeah, Max… [sighs]
Look, I've been meaning to talk
to you about that.
[sighs] Douglas, honey, can it wait?
Look, I've just survived a… [sighs]
…a near-death experience. [sighs]
Yes.
And I've made a life with Mitzi.
A life. And that life needs to be honored.
It can't just be tossed away
like some piece of…
- of garbage.
- No. Uh…
A child… My child deserves to have
both of its parents.
[chuckling] And I think that…
God, I think that you of…
As an orphan would understand that as…
as much as anybody.
So, listen. I've, uh… [sighs]
I've changed the plan.
Mitz and I will get married,
we'll have the baby,
then we'll get the money.
You'll get your share, of course.
Then, you and I can officially "reconcile"
when the kid is 18.
Doesn't that make a lot of sense?
God, I'm gonna be the first Dellacorte man
to see his child all the way to adulthood.
- Maxine?
- Eighteen?
- Yeah.
- Eighteen years from now? [chuckles]
- Just change the plan.
- [sighs]
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah.
Did you take your, uh… your aspirin today?
- Yeah. Every twelve hours like clockwork.
- Don't…
Don't do it, Maxine.
- [inhales sharply]
- Please.
The baby isn't even yours, you dum-dum.
Come again?
Mitzi's baby is not yours!
- [sighs]
- Now can we go?
[sighs] Yes, let's go.
I will see you at your wedding, and
you better be there or I will kill you.
[Dinah] Aw,
aren't you just the most glorious.
Glowing.
Mitzi, what is it?
[Mitzi sniffles, sighs]
I've always had a boyfriend.
And now,
I'm going to have a husband.
And promise to love and obey him forever.
And I'm tired of obeying, I think.
Husbands are as useful as you make them.
But what about me?
Like, actually me?
The way I looked at it
when I was your age…
was that it was much better
to feel safe and secure
and without any want,
while deciding on all
that hope and dream stuff.
It's not like I was cut out
to be a starving artist or something
'cause I'm definitely not an artist. So…
Why bother starving?
It's not easy to be a woman alone.
Just look at Maxine.
Sometimes someone else's desire
is a woman's best path to power.
[sighs]
Dinah?
What's wrong?
[Dinah, shakily] Oh, my God.
[stammers]
[breathing shakily]
"My dear Norma.
The less you give me,
the more I want to give you.
Here is my most prized possession:
The last uncollected Fabergé Imperial egg.
Yours always, Axel."
I will see you at the wedding. [chuckles]
[Evelyn] Here we are.
Thank God this is almost over.
[Maxine] So, what do you think?
They just eat him up? Clothes and all?
[Evelyn] I hope so. I have no desire
to see him undressed again.
Although he did have a dick like a…
an unsliced braciole.
Oh, my.
Oh, Lord. Here we are.
[Maxine] What? Where's the water?
[Evelyn] More importantly,
where are all the alligators?
[Maxine] "Maintenance… Okahumpa"?
[Evelyn] Oh, that's a three-hour drive.
We'll never make it back in time.
Oh, now we gotta think of another place
to stash the body until tonight.
[sighs]
[both] The freezer.
[screams]
Dinah!
How the devil did you get past
Fritz and Jorgen?
Someone is going to pay.
I don't care who pays.
So long as it's not me…
and it is not my husband.
Oh, my God. The twelfth Imperial egg.
Oh.
Never underestimate me again.
Repeat after me,
"You are a formidable person,
Mrs. Dinah Donahue."
"You are a formidable person,
Mrs. Dinah Donahue."
"You have standing, Mrs. Dinah Donahue."
Standing is practically your middle name.
- "You don't need to be scared anymore."
- Oh, honey, no one can promise you that.
Say it.
Uh, as God is my witness,
you will never be scared again.
Those words mean something
coming from you. [sighs]
Of course. Of course they do.
[Dinah] It's…
It's where you live. It's how you live.
[stammers] Someone…
Someone like you
living in a big, beautiful place like this
telling me it's all gonna be okay.
Hell, even if you're lying to me, it makes
me feel a little bit better about myself.
So thanks.
Don't mention it.
I'm not as rich as you.
But I am pretty fucking rich.
W-What is it you want for the egg?
I will give you anything.
If you really are as electorally powerful
as you say you are…
Perry Donahue will be
the next mayor of Palm Beach.
Every ballot box will be stuffed
with one name: Perry Donahue.
Cross my heart. What else?
Nothing else.
You must really love him.
[sighing]
[gasps]
Enjoy your egg.
I would've given you more.
[Dinah chuckles]
Yes, I'm getting that distinct impression.
Your winter White House dream,
I hope you get it.
No one should ever deny
a woman her most heartfelt desire.
Word of advice.
Never settle when you've got the goods.
[sighs]
Gosh. Do you think he's cold in there?
Yes, Maxine.
Do you… Do you think he can breathe?
No, Maxine.
[breathing shakily] Oh, God. Evelyn.
[whispering] I took a life.
Maxine, slap yourself.
[groans]
Oh. Thank you.
Now, focus on the many fruits
that Jed's dastardly actions
- and subsequent misfortune have labored.
- Okay.
Now, let's go get your ex-husband married.
Okay.
Maxine, how are you
holding up in all this?
[Maxine] Well, that depends.
Are you asking me strictly as a friend
or as a society reporter?
Strictly as your friend.
Strictly as a friend, it's probably
been the worst day of my life.
[Dinah] Okay. Where do you want these?
Oh, Dinah, I need a favor.
Can you please have Perry
go check on Douglas?
- Make sure he's all right?
- I would, but he's too busy
doing some stupid stag photo shoot
at the Shiny Sheet.
He's going to the Shiny Sheet?
That's what the telegram
he showed me said. Why?
That's where Tom said he was
going in order to shoot someone.
- Who's Tom?
- [stammers] Robert's secret lover, FBI.
Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
Well, the FBI was given a tip just today
that the Palm Beach mole
wanted to meet with me
at the Shiny Sheet today at 4:00
to give their side of the story.
But, Dinah, you say
Perry is heading there?
At 4:00.
W-Well, that's exactly when and where
Tom is going to shoot someone.
Perry is not some Soviet mole.
No. But he's being made to look like one.
Well, my blind item said that the mole
was some Palm Beach socialite.
Perry fits that bill perfectly.
Plus he's a former ambassador,
close to Nixon.
Wait. S-So you're saying
that the actual mole has arranged it so…
so Tom will shoot Perry
so it looks like Perry is the mole.
[Ann] And the Shiny Sheet
is the perfect place.
It's closed on Fridays in the offseason.
[sighs]
Perfect Patsy Perry,
yet again.
Sounds to me like who's ever
behind all of this just needs a body.
What would Norma do?
["Vehicle" playing]
N-No.
No.
No.
- Hi.
- This is not happening.
I fear it is indeed happening.
What the hell are you all doing here?
Your sting is a setup.
Your real mole is not gonna show.
Then who the hell is?
[music continues]
[Perry] Hello?
I'm ready for my picture.
[exclaims]
[sighs]
Chloroform.
From my gap year in Edinburgh. [chuckles]
[all grunting]
Hurry up.
God, forgive me. [breathes shakily]
- [gasps]
- [Maxine] Let go.
Hide.
[Dinah grunting]
[pants]
[Maxine] Oh, shit. Move out,
move out, move out. Shit.
Why is he frozen?
Congrats, agent.
Looks like you bagged
the Mole of Palm Beach.
- [gasps]
- Where the hell is everybody?
Mayor Barnhill?
Mitzi. [stammers]
What…
What happened? [stammers] Is it over?
Douglas called the whole thing off
because someone
told him it wasn't his baby.
[sighs] It's almost as if
I predicted the future.
[breathes deeply] Where is Douglas?
In the bar.
Also could've predicted that.
Benny, don't pack up yet.
You… You stay put.
- Wait. Where we going?
- [Benny] All right.
[Maxine] No, no, no, you stay here.
This is me.
[sighs]
I need you to get up off that chair
and go marry that girl.
[Douglas] No.
I need you to get in there
and marry Mitzi or so help me,
to sweet baby Jesus, and back,
I will shoot you myself.
[chuckling] Go ahead.
Probably shoot blanks. Just like me.
Oh. Jesus.
God, you… you used to get me with that.
I don't feel sorry for you.
[scoffs]
God, your ego.
[sighs]
Do you realize that I have given you…
I have given, and given, and given you
as-as much as a person can give
another person
since the day I laid eyes on you.
[breathes shakily]
And in return
I'm asking you to do this little thing!
And not just for me. But…
But for Mitzi too.
I owe her this.
I owe Evelyn this.
Please, Douglas, just…
[sighs] Do it for the girls!
Ma… [stammers, sighs]
I need to tell you something.
Marriage is not some little thing, Maxine.
Then why did you
throw ours away like it was?
- I… I… [scoffs]
- Why, Douglas?
You do not lecture me about marriage!
Are you happy?
Ever since we came to this town,
we've been so unhappy.
And I recall that before we came here,
we were happy.
Like… Like, truly happy, Maxine.
You may have been miserable.
But I'm having the greatest adventure
I've ever had in my entire life.
I made some calls.
[stammers] And I wanna go back to flying.
That is the place
that I was truly happiest.
Ferrying sleeping families
across the globe by starlight.
And… And then…
And then coming home
to find you waiting for me.
That's… That's what I want, Max.
I wanna go back to that.
You don't decide what we go back to.
You're not hearing me.
That's what I want.
I do hear you.
And I don't care what you want.
Wow.
Yeah, you are making
that very clear, aren't you?
Douglas, I need you to get up.
I need you to put on that tie,
put on that jacket,
stop drinking this booze.
I need you to marry Mitzi.
Or whatever love we have had between us,
it will be over.
Forever.
You and I
will never be over.
Ever.
You have a funny way of making
that sound like a threat. [chuckles]
Yeah. Well, maybe it is, Max.
Because you and I are forever.
And I think you know that.
That is the truth.
Come on! Come with me!
Come with me!
No.
You're gonna regret this.
[inhales sharply]
You're gonna regret this!
[Evelyn] Well?
[sighs]
There is a late arrival in there
you might want to attend to.
Late arrival?
[whispering] You know.
[Norma] Why do you keep throwing
parties that are a bust?
I came for a wedding
and to make one final move
to appeal to your better nature.
Well, I'm not sure
I have a better nature anymore.
But shoot.
Well, since none of us
has a claim on the money,
I thought maybe you
might be inclined to share it
with a wayward soul
and her wayward daughter.
Hmm. It's over.
We all lost.
[Norma] Mmm. Well… [chuckles]
- …I had quite a run in any event.
- [sighs]
[chuckles] I have to say,
it was kinda fun.
I'm sorry I thought
you killed a bunch of people.
[chuckles]
You know, we're exactly alike
in many ways, don't you think?
Willing to do almost anything
to continue to be someone we're not?
Do you think someone can do the
wrong thing, but for the right reason?
Oh, darling, you do your best.
And sometimes, your best falls short, and…
and when it does,
you find a way to do good.
How come we weren't
friends through all this?
[chuckles] When Douglas left my daughter
on her wedding day for you…
[sighs]
…my resentment
clouded my better judgment. I…
I hope you'll forgive me.
[Robert inhales sharply] Hmm.
I never thought I'd see this day.
The two of you getting along.
Well, how did it go?
Do we have a new member
on our Palm Beach social scene?
I need some good news.
Well, the judge wouldn't give custody
to a single man over a married couple,
so I have to send Rafi
back home tomorrow morning.
Oh, sweetie.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry too.
For the things
I said to you in Switzerland.
You didn't know,
because I didn't let you know.
I love you, son.
Rafi.
Come here.
I want you to meet your grandmother.
Norma, this is my son, Rafael.
- [chuckles] We're family?
- Mm-hmm.
How'd that happen?
Oh, it's a good story.
Something good came out of this
after all. [exhales sharply]
Something good.
Rafi, honey, will you go see
if Benny Barnhill's still here?
White hair, tuxedo, probably drunk.
[chuckles] Yeah.
[chuckles] Thanks, sweetie.
[Robert] Maxine?
If a judge needs you to be married
in order to get custody,
well, then, let's get you married.
[scoffs]
Listen, Maxine,
don't start with your things…
- Robert. Robert.
- …because you… It's crazy.
I will finally be able to do
the one thing I could never do.
Which would be to give the man I love…
a child.
[sighs] Maxine, we're talking about
marriage here.
- And that is a big decision…
- Stupid.
[chuckles]
It's a contract.
Have you looked at Palm Beach? [chuckles]
No one here marries for love anyway.
Which would make us special because,
well, I happen
to love you very, very much.
[chuckles]
I don't have a ring.
Wait.
Come here.
This bride should have
something more befitting.
I'll trade ya?
- Oh.
- [gasps]
Oh. [sighs] This ring…
the one thing in all of Palm Beach
that's truly mine,
should go to my daughter, Penelope.
Which is what I intended
on her wedding day,
which never came to pass…
20 years ago.
- Thank you.
- Oh.
[Benny] Here we are
gathered together today with this…
Perhaps I had a wicked childhood ♪
Perhaps I had a miserable youth ♪
But somewhere in my wicked
Miserable past ♪
There must have been a moment of truth ♪
For here you are standing there ♪
Loving me ♪
Whether or not you should ♪
So, somewhere in my youth or childhood ♪
I must have done something good ♪
Nothing comes from nothing ♪
And nothing ever could ♪
So, somewhere in my youth ♪
Or childhood ♪
I must have done ♪
Something good ♪
I can't be Maxine.
I can't spend the rest of my life
hung up on the ins and outs
of does he or doesn't he,
or do I or don't I.
I see the way you look at her.
I can't give you that.
What do you want, Evelyn?
[sighs]
I think at this point in my life,
the thing I want most
is something you can't give me.
My independence.
Are you sure?
I've never been more sure, honey.
I need you to understand
I am too good for you.
- [stammers] I do understand that.
- [sighs]
Sometimes, I wonder if you do.
[breathes deeply]
Are we going to make it, babe?
[sighs]
I hope so. I really do.
[Mitzi] Eddie, wait.
Are you getting outta here?
Yeah.
Can I hitch a ride?
For here you are
Standing there, loving me ♪
Whether or not you should ♪
So, somewhere in my youth
Or childhood ♪
I must have done ♪
Something good ♪
Nothing comes from nothing ♪
Nothing ever could ♪
So, somewhere in my youth ♪
Or childhood ♪
I must have done ♪
Something ♪
Good ♪
[music ends]
[chuckles]
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you,
- Mr. and Mrs. Dellacorte.
- [Maxine chuckles]
- [chuckles]
- [guests applauding]
[Maxine] Where'd she go?
"I played my part. Gotta run now."
[Robert clears throat]
Wow. Another glass salad bowl.
Huh.
It's funny.
[sighs] We took his house, his name,
his wedding, and now his wedding gifts.
I kinda feel bad for Douglas.
I don't.
You know, I've…
I've just had a thought.
Does it involve a scheme?
No, it does not involve a scheme.
It's just a rumination
that I can't help but having.
[sighs]
Go ahead.
Now that you're officially a Dellacorte,
technically, if you had Rafi
during a legitimate marriage,
that would've unlocked the baby trust.
[chuckles]
It's wild.
I was…
married to his mother when he was born.
[gasps]
Well, that sounds legitimate to me.
- [chuckles]
- [chuckles]
Do you see that cloud up there
With the number nine? ♪
It's mine, it's mine
It's mine, it's mine ♪
Okay, boys. Bring in the money!
Love was hiding around the corner ♪
This lonely mourner heard the call ♪
Then love found me
And put his arms around me ♪
Beat the drum
Sound the brass ♪
What a groove
What a gas ♪
Here I come
Let me pass ♪
Cottage small or wall-to-wall
Enchanted bliss-ville ♪
In old, new kiss-ville ♪
The greenest, grandest
Greatest state of 'em all ♪
If it lasts forever
I'll love it ♪
If it's one short lifetime
What of it ♪
One short lifetime
Is long enough for singing ♪
Listen, love
I had a ball ♪
…D. I. T.
Maxine did it.
Bootlegger, what do you mean?
"Maxine did it, yay."
Or, "Maxine did it."
[crowd cheering]
The only complication was that the mole
wasn't actually the body you said it'd be.
Does the FBI think they have their mole?
They most certainly do.
Or we wouldn't have immunity.
Then, who cares who the body is?
Even better, the way the cards lay now,
the Palm Beach mole
has got herself a well-placed patsy.
- [crowd cheering]
- [laughing] Thank you.
[cackles]
- Pose.
- Oh, right here.
They bought it. I'm in.
Call me lover and call me shameless ♪
Love, you aren't exactly blameless ♪
Love, my life is no longer aimless now ♪
I'm delirious, I'm ecstatic ♪
Music maestro and me, emphatic ♪
Beat the drum
Sound the brass ♪
What a groove
What a gas ♪
Here I come
Let me pass ♪
Cottage small or wall-to-wall ♪
Enchanted bliss-ville ♪
In old, new kiss-ville ♪
The greenest, grandest
Greatest state of 'em all ♪
If it's one long swinger ♪
I'll love it ♪
If it's one short stinger ♪
Oh, what of it ♪
[Maxine, choir] One short lifetime
Is long enough for singing ♪
What a gas ♪
What a smash ♪
What a blast ♪
What a bash ♪
I had a ♪
Ball ♪
[choir] Ball
- Wow!
- [song ends]
Senator, welcome to the grand re-opening.
- Oh, Countess.
- Hello, ladies.
- [Maxine gasps]
- [chuckles]
We started the season saying
we were gonna take this town.
And it looks like
we've pretty much taken it.
- [chuckles]
- [giggles]
[Evelyn]
Thanks for paying off the tax bill.
[Maxine] Don't mention it, partner.
[sighs]
Golly. [chuckles]
Being here with you.
Running the center
of the town that runs the world.
Heck, we might be the most powerful women
in the most powerful place on Earth.
Oh. Easy, tiger.
If we've taken over
Palm Beach, what's next?
[chuckles] The world?
What a gas ♪
What a smash ♪
What a blast ♪
What a bash ♪
I had a ♪
Ball ♪
Wow ♪
[Linda] Dear Maxine,
Greetings from the City of Light.
Paris is beautiful this time of year.
Thank you for wiring such a hefty chunk
of the baby money.
["Non, je ne regrette rien" playing]
I know how hard you worked for it.
It allows me to be free.
I can be anyone I wanna be,
anywhere I wanna be.
So, thank you.
Thank you for helping me
become truly lost.
So I could finally be found.
Maxine, I found love.