Happy Days (1974) s02e15 Episode Script

1
Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪
Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪
Ready to race to you ♪
These days are ours ♪
Happy and free ♪Oh, happy days ♪
These days are ours ♪
Share them with me ♪Oh, baby ♪
Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪
There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪
It feels so right, it can't be wrong ♪
Rocking and rolling all week long ♪
Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪
Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
Saturday, what a day ♪
Groovin' all week with you ♪
These days are ours ♪
Share them with me ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
These days are ours ♪
Happy and free ♪Oh, baby ♪
These happy days are yours and mine ♪
These happy days are yours and my happy days! ♪
Oh, hey, Rich, how you doing?
What are you guys doing?
You don't know anything about politics.
We might not know anything about politics,
but we know Stevenson chicks are tougher than Ike's.
Very patriotic.
What's your motto: "Make Out For America"?
Not bad.
Who are you for, Rich?
He's probably gonna be for
whoever his old man wants him to be for.
Well, I don't see you guys going
against your fathers.
Hey, if the situation called for it, we would.
Right, but we wouldn't tell them.
Since when is politics the key to sex?
Are you kidding?
I heard about a guy who was canvassing in '52.
He rang a lady's doorbell and didn't come out till '54.
Well, I don't think I could support somebody
without a sincere reason.
What are you being so serious about, Rich?
Don't you know sincerity and politics don't mix?
Hi, Debbie.
Hi, Richie.
Win with Adlai.
Yeah.
Oh, uh Hi, guys.
Oh, hey, Deb, you brought the stuff, great.
Debbie, listen,
I was wondering, if you're not gonna be busy
this Saturday night, I thought maybe
Oh, gee, I'm sorry, Richie,
but I really am very busy.
You see, I've been elected president
of the Junior Democrats for Stevenson.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Congratulations.
Are you for Stevenson?
Well, sort of.
I'm very interested in him.
Well, great.
See you then, Rich.
Remember, Adlai's the one.
Bye! Debbie! Debbie!
Sincere, Rich, very sincere.
Har-dee-har-har.
What do you think, Ralph?
Hey, come on.
Sha-la-la ♪
Sha-la-la-la. ♪
"Howard, don't pull down the garage door.
It's broken. Marion."
Thanks, Marion.
Hurry up, dear; We're starting without you.
Hi, Dad.
I got your note, Marion.
I'm so glad.
I was so afraid that you would miss it,
so I put it right on the garage door
so that when you pulled it down,
you'd see it, and you wouldn't pull it down.
Oh, I guess I made a mistake.
You guessed right.
By the way, Marion,
how come there was a Stevenson bumper sticker
on the back of my car, huh?
Kids are putting those on bumpers all over town.
Someone even put one on my shopping cart.
Well, we weren't allowed to do that when I was a boy.
Did they have bumpers when you were a kid?
No, sweetheart, we used to paste them
on the backs of dinosaurs.
Har-dee-har-har.
All the kids say that, dear.
Kids say it, Marion, not mothers.
Why is Dad so crabby?
Oh, your father's always like this on an election year.
As long as Eisenhower wins, he'll be all right.
Potsie and Ralph are campaigning for Stevenson.
Why Stevenson?
Cause everyone knows all the Eisenhower girls are flat.
Dear, it's not nice to generalize like that.
I suppose you let Ralph and Potsie talk you
into campaigning for Stevenson, huh?
Well, they asked me to, but I didn't.
Well, good for you, Richard.
I'm glad to see you respect your father's opinion.
I respected my father, and he
taught me plenty about politics.
I guess there's a lot to learn,
but politics never really knocked me out.
Well, it should.
You're gonna be old enough to vote pretty soon,
and it's important to pick the right man.
And take it from me, in this election, the right man is Ike.
Why do you want Eisenhower?
Anybody who takes the time to sit down
and have Thanksgiving dinner with a tired G.I.
gets my vote.
Dear, there were 80,000 other soldiers there.
That's right, Marion, and he saw to it
that each and every one of us got a slice of canned turkey.
That's why you're voting for him?
A man who can lead armies
can certainly lead a nation better than some intellectual.
I heard that Stevenson was for banning
unnecessary H-bomb tests.
They're not unnecessary.
The world wouldn't be safe without the bomb.
Pass the chicken, will you, Marion?
I hear Aaron and Matthews signed a '57 contract.
Debbie! Hey, Deb.
Hi.
Are you working for Stevenson now, Rich?
He'll go Ike, like his Dad.
He, he's just kidding.
You look very nice dressed in Stevenson.
Actually, I was kind of leaning his way.
It'll be fun working with you.
I'll see you later.
I can choose who I want.
It's a free country.
I pick Stevenson.
He's a good man.
Wait a minute.
I weighed the issues, and I made my own choice.
Very objective.
Based on his foreign policies and his, his
past achievements and
And Debbie Hauser's legs.
Right, it makes me dizzy every time I look at her.
And we have still another convert
to the Stevenson camp
A young man who made a cool, clear choice.
So examine your own conscience to see
You're giving me a headache.
I said cheeseburger.
Richie, will you cheer up?
If Debbie Hauser had showed up in a bikini,
she could have converted me to socialism.
Hey, it's your dad. Yeah.
Hey, Mr. C.
Hi, Dad.
If one of you guys did that, it's not funny.
It wasn't me, Rich. Me, neither.
It must have been Freddy Hackman.
He's a real fanatic.
Hi, Rich, boys.
Hi, Dad. Mr. C.
They did it again!
Those dirty little juvenile Democrats.
If I ever get my hands
on one of those kids, I'll
Dad, the door!
I know, I know, it's broken.
You're mother wrote me.
If Stevenson wasn't running for the presidency,
I would never have done such a dumb thing.
Those Democrats make people crazy!
Maybe you should run away and send him a postcard
telling him you're a Democrat.
I'm not a Democrat.
I'm a skirt-chaser, like you guys.
How am I gonna explain going against family tradition
just because I want to neck with Debbie Hauser?
I'd buy it.
Look, Rich, you're doing good with her.
It could pay off.
I'm not doing that good.
But you were with her
last night and all day today.
All we do is hand out buttons and stickers
and, and discuss Stevenson's economic policy.
What a waste of a good campaign.
She won't even go out with me until after the election.
Oh, she doesn't believe in pre-election sex.
Now, look, don't be discouraged.
It'll all work out in time.
Politics is better than going
to a drive-in movie with Louise Farkus.
Today, I was going door-to-door on Maple Street,
and I went up to Mrs. Reed's house.
The divorcée? Really?
That's right.
And you know what they say about divorced women.
They don't have husbands.
Right.
So I walked in Walk slowly.
What was she wearing?
A really short dress.
How short?
Her knees were showing.
And then she gives me one of those looks.
And the bedroom door was open.
You got the picture?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
She's got a double bed with pink satin sheets.
Pink satin.
And then what happened?
Nothing. She's for Ike.
You know, I really like Stevenson's European policy.
Yeah.
Yeah, and, uh, I like his stand on Berlin.
Absolutely.
And I think that Kefauver is definitely gonna be
a lot more help to him than his '52 running mate.
Yeah. I forget his name.
Oh, his, his '52 running mate's name was, uh
John J. Sparkman.
Wow!
You're really up on Stevenson.
Well, I feel if you're gonna support
a candidate you should learn
Hey, Richie, can we talk privately?
Yeah.
Sure, why not?
You'd like to talk privately?
Uh
Oh! Come on, Rich, get to work, huh?
Why don't we go in there?
Great.
Now, uh, what did you want to talk about?
You know more about Stevenson than anybody.
You should give the speech on Sunday.
What speech?
The youth rally at Arnold's.
You've got to convince the voters
that Stevenson is the man.
Sunday's our last chance.
Sunday?
I'll be in church.
All day?
I've got a lot to pray about.
Oh, Richie, you're just nervous, that's all.
You'll make a great spokesman for Stevenson.
And just think how excited your father'll be.
Yeah, sure.
He'll hardly be able to contain himself.
Ba-ba-ba-bay, ba, ba, ba, ba-ba, ba, ran ♪
Boo, boo-boo, boo-boo, boo. ♪
What I'd like to know is how you in your right mind
could even consider Stevenson?
Oh, pass me the screwdriver, will you?
I did research.
Research, huh?
Well, did your research tell you
that the Democrats solve problems with war
and that Republicans are the party of peace and prosperity?
Well, if the Republicans are so great,
how come Eisenhower waited until he was 60
to join the party?
He's got a point.
Maybe Ike was a late bloomer.
Marion!
This is not funny, Marion.
Our son is going over to the enemy.
Sorry, dear.
Wrench.
And another thing,
Eisenhower has raised the standard of living,
and it's gonna continue to go up.
It's not going up; That's just inflation.
And Stevenson has a plan to curb that inflation.
Did you hear that, Marion?
A 17-year-old kid is telling me about inflation.
What's Ike inflating?
Oh, everything.
Marion!
Nothing, dear.
Dad, I believe in him,
and I'm gonna give a speech for him at the youth rally.
A speech? You're gonna make a speech for Stevenson?
That's right. You know what I think?
I think you've been brain-washed
by some pretty little un-flat girl.
No, Dad, I've just decided that I think
Stevenson is the better man.
Better man? Stevenson's been divorced.
He can't even run his own family!
Now, how do you expect him to run the country? Pliers!
Listen, when a man is asking to run the whole country,
he better be able to lay his whole life open to criticism.
And I'll tell you why you should be for Ike
Because I'm for Ike.
Well, I don't think that's a good enough reason.
My family has been Republican
ever since there have been Republicans.
Now, how's that for a reason?
Well, if you want to know the truth,
I'd say it's pretty narrow-minded.
N-N-Narrow Did you hear that, Marion?
He said I was narrow-minded!
Yes, dear, I heard it.
Is this door finished? Yes,
it's finished Now, everybody inside.
Dad, it's only that I I don't want
to talk about it anymore, Richard.
When a kid stops listening,
maybe a parent should stop talking!
It's fixed.
Fixed by a Republican.
Richard, I think you should wait a few moments
before you apologize.
I'm right. I know I'm right.
Why should I have to apologize?
Well Look out, Joanie.
Because he's your father.
Right or wrong, I always apologize.
It keeps my allowance coming in.
Why is it Dad's allowed to stick up for his principles,
but I have to give up mine? Well, it's like I said
Because he's your father. Is that a good enough reason?
No, dear, it's not.
Howard, aren't you carrying this a little too far?
Marion,
if this chisel doesn't work, I'm considering dynamite.
I mean with Richie.
Too far?
My own son defies me, and he calls me narrow-minded.
Now, that doesn't exactly make us buddies, Marion.
He didn't defy you.
You were just discussing politics,
and he expressed his point of view.
Yeah, but we weren't talking about whether
he could stay up late and watch The Steve Allen Show,
we were talking about who's gonna run the country!
I know.
Well, Richard is growing up, and
he does have opinions of his own.
I'm not interested in his opinions.
I'm a Republican, my father was a Republican,
his father before him was a Republican,
this is a Republican house, and anybody who lives in it
is a Republican!
It's probably not the time to bring this up,
but I think it would be a good idea
if we went to hear Richard speak tomorrow.
I mean, even though we don't agree with him,
after all it's his first speech in public and
I was right.
It was the wrong time to bring it up.
Howard Richard isn't the only one
who thinks you're narrow-minded.
Thank you, Marsha.
I-It's an honor to be speaking here today.
Oh, look, we're just in time for the silver-tongued orator.
You want to hear him just as much as I do.
Marion, I only came to hear the Republican side.
But I guess we got to go through
the chaff to get to the wheat.
You don't give up easy, do you?
My fellow Americans,
I come before you today to speak for a man
who stands for America.
Yeah, but can America stand him?
Adlai Stevenson is a man of action,
a man who carries with him a great family tradition
of service to America.
His grandfather was vice president.
Hey, kid, I thought there was vice in his family.
Hey, mac, he's no kid, and he's entitled to his opinion.
But to triumph.
Yeah, that-a-boy, Rich!
I know many people think Stevenson
is just an intellectual,
but I say to you that a vote for Stevenson
is a vote for all men, big or small.
All right! Yeah! Yay!
His foreign policy is one of great insight.
His domestic policy will be one of action
rather than inaction.
We need a man who can think in the White House.
I hope you'll all join me in supporting Adlai Stevenson
for President of the United States.
Yeah! That-a-boy, Richie!
Hi, you fellow Americans.
I'm Wendy, and I'm just here to say,
it doesn't matter who you vote for
The important thing is to vote, vote, vote!
Thank you, Wendy.
And thank you, Richie, for a truly inspiring speech.
And now now in the interest of fairness,
we will hear a speech for the other candidate,
whose name escapes me.
Now you're gonna hear some intelligent politics.
Arthur Fonzarelli.
Well, there's your man, Howard.
How come Fonzie's speaking for Ike?
Why not? Fonzie's got more friends than Ike does.
Hey, he won the war for you, didn't he?
Hey, hey!
Hey! Now, listen.
If Ike loses, the Fonz is gonna be ma-ha-ha-ad!
I'll tell you, I like Ike.
My bike likes Ike!
So get out and work for the old guy.
And one more thing, huh, for all you volunteers
at the Eisenhower booth, there's free root beer
and, uh, hot dogs, huh? Hey!
Hey!
Let's get a hot dog, Marion.
Hey, where are you guys going?
Don't worry, we're still for Stevenson,
but our stomachs are for Ike. Yeah.
Tonight, we are not Republicans and Democrats,
but Americans.
And while we have lost the battle,
I am supremely confident
that our cause will ultimately prevail.
Now I bid you good night.
I really wanted him to win.
Hey, Fonzie. What are you doing here?
You belong with the winners.
Hey, there's a political saying
that says, "Go with the losers."
Down at the other place, the girls are all happy,
they're up, dancing They don't need me.
Here all the girls are down, depressed.
I'll give them a little spiritual uplifting, you know?
And besides my heart goes out to them.
Hey.
I know just how you feel.
Well
Come on, I'll I'll take you home.
No. I'd rather be alone.
Yeah, but, you see, we're losers.
We should at least console each other.
You know, spiritual uplifting.
No, Richie, I'm sorry.
I can't go out with you tonight or any night.
Why not?
It'd be too painful.
Every time we'd be together, I'd think of Stevenson.
Oh, that's ridiculous. No, it isn't.
Every time my mother kisses my father,
she thinks of Wendell Wilkie.
Bye, Richie.
Hi.
I kind of thought you'd be here.
Hi, Dad.
Oh, I wouldn't worry There'll be other Debbies.
I hope not.
What are you doing here?
I thought you'd be at the Eisenhower
celebration. Well, I-I was.
But Fonzie said he was coming over here, and
I figured, where Fonzie goes, uh you know.
It was a nice speech, Richard.
I didn't think you'd like it.
Well, I didn't agree with it, but I liked it.
Dad, I was right doing what I did.
Richard, when I was your age,
teenagers wouldn't even think of arguing politics
with their fathers.
My father was a Republican, his father was a Republican
That's how we voted, and that's the way it was.
So when you went against me, uh,
well, I guess I got a little miffed.
I began to see a boy growing into a man,
and I wasn't ready to give the boy up yet.
Well, anyway, our relationship
can't be the same anymore.
I'm sorry, Dad.
Oh, no, no, I think it's good.
I think I'm gonna enjoy having
another man around the family.
Now, what do you say you and I go over
to Stanley's Pizza Parlor
and get ourselves a nice, big, fat, juicy pepperoni, huh?
Oh, I'd rather get onion.
Richard, Stanley's famous for his pepperoni.
I mean, we always get pepperoni.
Oh, we'll get half and half, hmm?
I mean, if a Democrat and a Republican can live together
in the same family, I guess an onion and a pepperoni
can live together on the same pizza.
I'll go get my coat.
Hi, Ralph. Hi, Rich.
Who won? Wilkie.
Thanks, Rich.
President of the United States.
And so Dwight David Eisenhower goes back to Washington
with the largest popular vote victory
in American history.
Who won?
Eisenhower.
Was I for him?
You betcha.
Then yippee, and I'm going back to bed.
Mom, did you vote for Eisenhower?
Well, of course she did.
Well, who else?
"Who else," Marion?
Well, I think I'll go upstairs.
Marion Now, wait a minute, Marion,
did you vote for Eisenhower or not?
Well, let's put it this way, dear
You know that vote that you got up so early to cast?
I think mine canceled yours out.
But you weren't supposed to do that!
Why not? Adlai is a good man.
Oh, what do you know about Adlai Stevenson?
I read up on him.
Oh, happy days ♪
This day is ours ♪
Oh, please be mine ♪
Oh, happy ♪
This day is ours ♪
Happy days. ♪
Hello, sunshine, good-bye, rain ♪
She's wearing my school ring on her chain ♪
She's my steady, I'm her man ♪
I'm gonna love her all I can ♪
This day is ours ♪
Won't you be mine? ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
This day is ours ♪
Oh, please be mine ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
These happy days are yours and mine ♪
These happy days are yours and my happy days! ♪