Happy Days (1974) s02e21 Episode Script

1
Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪
Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪
Ready to race to you ♪
These days are ours ♪
Happy and free ♪Oh, happy days ♪
These days are ours ♪
Share them with me ♪Oh, baby ♪
Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪
There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪
It feels so right, it can't be wrong ♪
Rocking and rolling all week long ♪
Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪
Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪
Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪
Saturday, what a day ♪
Groovin' all week with you ♪
These days are ours ♪
Share them with me ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
These days are ours ♪
Happy and free ♪Oh, baby ♪
Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪
There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪
It feels so right, it can't be wrong ♪
Rocking and rolling all week long ♪
These happy days are yours and mine ♪
These happy days are yours and mine, Happy Days! ♪
Now for the Duane Eddy look alike contest winners.
Next week, yes, sir,
at the Lake Highland High School sock hop.
So, get on your socks and bop on down
for the fun and the excitement.
And now listen to this number!
Look, Norman, I'm tellin' you.
I'm a tough disc jockey
and top deserves top.
I want top compensation.
You want, huh? You know what I want?
What? I want you to shut up
and stop bothering me about more money.
Here's the basketball scores. I
happen to be a big personality.
No Elvis Presley is a big personality.
And if he walked into this room this very minute,
I'd say, "Elvis, baby, not another nickel."
Jefferson lost 89 to 45.
Thanks, kid. Keep that broom moving.
Did you listen to that intro?
Are you gonna stand there and tell me
that I don't deserve a raise?
Any idiot could sit in front of that mike
and throw that garbage out to those kids.
Garbage?
That garbage is style!
Style?
I'll tell you how much style you got.
Even he could do what you're doing.
I quit. Good-bye.
You quit? That's right.
You can't quit. You're fired.
Yeah? You can't fire me,
I quit! Really? Good riddance.
Yeah, I'll send you a postcard from the big time.
Good. It'll probably come "postage due."
You dirty
Get rid of the broom, kid, you're on.
On what? On the air.
Here, sit down here.
I'll go into the booth, I'll point my finger at you,
you flick the mike, read the intro to the next record.
There's nothing to it. Me?
Don't you think you should do this?
Are you kidding?
Microphones give me the shingles.
This is, uh Richard J. Cunningham
Hey, you weren't bad, Cunningham.
But how long you had that stuttering problem?
Oh, yeah, well, I guess I was a little nervous.
Yeah.
You know, I don't think kids identify with a
with an adult ranting and raving.
But with you it's different.
You're one of them
even with the stuttering.
It was kind of fun.
Hey.
I think I'm onto something here
A teenage deejay.
Teen deejay?
Yeah. You'll fill in for Charlie for a while.
You'll still get your
25 bucks a week, but starting tomorrow,
you won't have to sweep up anymore.
That's great!
I won't have to refill the paper towels in the men's room?
Not so fast, kid.
One step at a time.
Get some rest.
Good night, Mr. Bander. Good night, kid.
Don't forget to lock up. Thanks a lot.
Bean casserole?
I hate bean casserole.
It's good for you.
Monday we had liver, Tuesday: Cauliflower,
today: Bean casserole.
What could be worse?
Thursday?
Boy, this hasn't been a terrific week for my mouth.
Oh, hi, everybody.
Sorry I'm late.
Guess what happened today?
Let me try. Um
Richard was late for dinner.
It's your turn to say grace.
Thank you, Lord, for these gifts
we are about to receive.
And thank you for letting me be a disc jockey at W-O-W.
Amen.
Amen.
A disc jockey at W-O-W?
Charlie the Prince quit his job at the radio station today
and I filled in for him for half an hour.
Is that good?
It's great!
No, it's not.
Charlie the Prince was my favorite person in the world.
He's the only disc jockey who ever gave me his autograph.
Well, your brother's a disc jockey now,
so he can write in your book.
Boy, first bean casserole and now this.
I'm really proud of you, Rich.
Thanks, Pots. How was it?
Oh, it was lots of fun.
Were you nervous?
A little bit at first, then I got used to it.
Hey, that's neat.
You want me to teach it to you after work?
It's not that neat.
Do you think she walks that way on purpose?
I don't think she does anything on purpose.
You're a real celebrity, Rich.
Did you see the way everybody was looking at you in there?
Yeah, I can't figure out
how they recognize me from the radio.
You have a very distinctive stutter.
We heard you yesterday.
You're better than Charlie the Prince.
The prince is dead. Long live the king.
Hey Oh, hey, Fonzie. Hey, your majesty.
Heard you on the radio.
What did you think, Fonz? Well, not half bad.
Not half bad. Thanks.
Yeah, come here.
I want you to make, uh, this dedication for me.
Oh, sure.
"To the Drysdale sisters,
Beth and Jenny, from Fonzie and Sam."
Yeah.
Who's Sam?
Oh, that's me.
I I don't want the Drysdale sisters
to know they're competing.
Hi, out there, folks.
This is W-O-W, the wow radio station
and I'm I'm Richie the C.
We're gonna start off today's music with a record.
Come in here a minute, will you, Richie?
I understood every word.
I hope you didn't mind that "Richie the C."
It sounds a little more rock and rollish.
It's catchy.
Do you know what I mean?
And it's probably easy enough for your fans to spell.
Well, yeah.
You know something?
I like your style.
I didn't know I had a style.
That's what I like about it.
How would you like to be my top disc jockey permanently?
You mean have my own radio show every day?
Well, let's give it a spin and see if it comes up money.
Oh, well, thank you, Mr. Bander.
Besides, at $25 a week, you're a steal.
Well, for a chance like this, I'd do it for nothing.
I gave that some thought.
Richie, every girl in school was talking about you today.
You've got it made.
Yeah, Rich, just think how great you'd do
if you weren't so average.
Average?
Yeah, you got no pizzazz.
"Hi, ha, this is Richie the C.
"Our next record is 'Splish Splash
I Was Taking a Bath.'"
I mean, what is that?
He's right, Rich average.
Yeah, but that's my style.
That's my patter.
You need excitement.
Like this
"Hey, guys and gals and submarine race fans,
"here's a rocking rolling platter just for you.
Now, don't get your feet wet, it's 'Splish Splash!'"
What happened?
What happened?
It's all right. Oh.
That's pretty good, Ralph.
He's right.
And, Rich, the way you dress:
average, very average.
Yeah, I guess I could dress a little sharper.
If I were in your shoes, I'd wear neon.
We know all about image making.
Sally Hargrove wouldn't be head cheerleader
if we hadn't told her to wear padding.
She's not head cheerleader.
No, but she will be this year.
One more pair of rolled up socks
and she'll be a legend.
Hey, Rich, what are you gonna talk about on today's show?
Why not talk about girls?
Girls?
I forgot to call the girls.
Hey, we're still taking them
to the state fair Saturday, right?
I can't go.
What do mean, you can't go?
Your uncle's taking the tickets.
You're supposed to get us in for nothing, remember?
If you can't go, I can't go.
I'm flat broke. Me, too. Why can't you go?
The station booked me to do this supermarket opening.
Supermarket opening?
What's the big deal?
Could be good for my career.
What career?
You're just a high school kid playing announcer
on a two-bit station.
Come on.
Typical Hollywood story.
The star climbing to the top
over the crushed bodies of his friends.
Come on, Rich, go to the fair.
I can't go.
I have this supermarket commitment and that's it.
Boy, after we made you a big star.
That's some gratitude, Ralph.
We apologize, America, for creating a monster.
Come on, Ralph.
Give me a padded Sally Hargrove any day.
No kidding.
All righty, rooty, reedy, righty reed.
Now, it's time for Richie the C.
Making the rounds with the latest sounds!
You keep talking into that hairbrush
and your comb is gonna get jealous.
I was just practicing my hep radio patter.
Where'd you get this jacket?
How do you think I'd look in a duck tail?
Like a red-headed duck.
Did the station give you a raise?
Oh, you mean those threads?
No, I charged those.
You opened up a charge account?
It's all right, Dad.
The money in my savings account'll cover it.
Richie, I thought we agreed
that that money was for college.
Well, Dad
I've been thinking maybe I don't need college.
Oh, well, if you had been thinking,
you wouldn't have said that.
How you gonna get a good job if you don't go to college?
Well, I don't need a job.
I'll have a career.
Mr. Bander thinks I might be another Wolfman Jack.
I bet he went to college.
University of Transylvania.
That's pretty good, Dad.
I think you and I better have a little talk.
Dad, I want to be a jock.
All a jock needs is some hep patter and a real gone image.
Now, they just don't teach that jazz in college.
Richard, your mother and I have been planning
for you to go to college since the day you were born.
Dad, didn't you hear me?
I just went over that whole scene.
Well, how am I supposed to know that?
You stopped talking English.
Leave it, Rich.
It's you.
And this latest dizzy disc is a
Richie the C. Pick platter!
Cute, kid, cute.
But do me a favor, will you?
Scream a little quieter.
Well, that's my style, Mr. Bander.
Oh! That's what that is. Yeah.
Just announce the records.
They make enough noise.
Listen, Richie the C.,
we're going to have to do a remote.
Remote?
Yeah. That's a broadcast from a location.
WEE, our competition,
did one from the Bon Soir Lounge,
and they clobbered us in the Hooper ratings.
Now, is there a little Bon Soir Lounge in your life?
Someplace where we could go?
You know, where there's a lot of people?
Yeah. Sure.
We could broadcast it from Arnold's Drive-In.
Now, let's get down to business.
These are Arnold's terms.
One: With every record introduction,
it should be mentioned clearly
that the show is coming live from Arnold's Drive-In
Sounds fair.
The World's Best Hamburger Emporium.
Uh I don't know.
Number two: It should be mentioned at least five times
Five times during the evening Hey, Rich!
We're playing Central High
Friday, and we're planning on raiding the campus
and stealing their goat.
Yeah, come on over to the table.
We need your help.
Come on, guys. I can't right now.
I'm in conference.
Well, la de da. I'm sorry.
Sorry.
As I was saying, the cheeseburger, the nutburger
Hey, Richie the C., huh?
I got a favor to ask you.
My girl Felice wants me
to fix up her square but cute sister.
Can't it wait, Fonz?
We're negotiating here, you know?
Well, excuse me. Hey!
Huh? Next time I need to talk to you,
what I'll do is I'll call up your secretary,
make an appointment, huh? Hey!
Could we continue?
Well Hi, guys.
Hey, if it ain't the old businessman.
Yeah. Is your big conference over?
I know it seemed like
that I was brushing you guys off over there.
Hey, why should we think that?
I know what this looks like, but it's not that way.
Look, guys, I've hit a fork in the road.
It's something that happens to everybody.
It'll happen to you guys one day.
I've got a chance to make it big as a deejay,
but it means I'm not going
to have the time to do some of the things that I used to do.
It's the price you have to pay for success.
Now, you guys can understand that, right?
Sure. We understand.
Good. I feel a lot better.
Yeah, I understand all right.
He just said he hasn't got time for his friends
since he became a big shot.
What do you think we should do, Fonz?
Hey.
I think that we should rake him over the coals
till he cries "Wolf."
Isn't that a mixed metaphor?
Do you think he's going to know the difference?
All right, kid, now, listen.
I'll handle everything outside from the remote box.
You'll be able to hear me through this intercom.
Now, are you ready?
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
This isn't just an audience.
These are my buddies.
Good. Break a leg.
Mom, Dad, what are you doing here?
Your mother and I came over
to see what you're blowing college on.
We wanted to see you on radio, darling.
Yeah. Maybe you're better than when we just hear you.
Straighten your tie, dear.
Oh, let him be, Marion.
You're ruining my image.
This never happened to Wolfman Jack.
Any mother who names her son Wolfman
deserves what she gets.
Listen, listen.
Now, why don't you come right over here?
Come on. Um
Why don't Why don't you just stand right over here?
In a restroom?
Yeah. You'll be able to see everything.
Right there.
We'll be out of the way. We got you.
Hi, guys.
Hey, it's Richie the Wow, wow, wow "C"!
15 seconds.
Well, I got to get going.
I'm busy with my radio show.
Hey, hey, hey, guys and gals and submarine watchers,
it's me, it's me, it's Richie the "C"
coming at you live from Arnold's Drive-In
with a live audience, live dedications and live records
all coming at you on the power radio WOW!
Come, on guys! Let's hear it for WOW!
Ho Boy, we've got a terrific crowd here tonight.
We're going to rock with this jock and roll with
Well, whatever rhymes with roll
Right after this message from La Rosa's Barber Shop.
Hey, hey, hey!
Come on, guys, we're on the air.
Now, look, I know you're all a little nervous,
but let's show them the old Jefferson High spirit, okay?
Come on.
Okay, three seconds two one
You're on.
Hey, hey, hey! It's Richie the "C",
comin' at you, uh live from Arnold's Drive-In,
the World's Best Hamburger Emporium,
home of the Ricky Nelson burger,
Big Bopper shakes
and, starting tomorrow Ha, ha, ha!
Richie the "C" onion rings.
And now it's time for our first dedication.
Richie the "C" onion rings?
Here's a real gone cat
who is never at a loss for words Potsie Weber!
There's Ralph Malph.
How about you, Ralphy, baby?
Oh, ho, ho! A little nervous, huh?
Well, well Well, look who's here. Fonzie.
Fonzie, who would you like to dedicate the first record to?
Well, uh how about you?
Well, uh I'll make the first dedication.
And I'll make it to uh
Arnold, of Arnold's Hamburger Emporium,
in honor of his double onion burger.
Hey, what happened to your friends?
Are they studying for their finals?
Boy, is he bombing out.
Oh, that's not true, Joanie.
Your brother's doing just fine.
Oh, Howard, he's bombing out.
Don't worry, Marion.
They'll warm up to him.
It's their first time on radio.
Well, we're really humming along now.
It's time for another record dedication.
Anybody? Anybody at all.
You you just shout one out.
Oh, Howard, help him.
Okay, okay.
Uh Look, I have a request.
Oh, hi, sir. It's nice to see
that the older generation is represented here tonight.
What are you talking about, the older generation?
Who would you like to dedicate the next record to?
Uh uh uh I got one!
Oh, hello, little girl. What's your name?
Joanie the "C".
Oh, now, no relation, no relation.
Would you like to make a record dedication?
Sure. I'd like to dedicate the next record
to someone I really
admire, and have always looked up to.
Oh. And who's that, little girl?
Charlie the Prince, who used to have this show.
And and now, here's a word for all you kids out there.
Yeah, there goes the short but happy career
of Richie the "C".
Maybe we're taking this too far.
Yeah.
Do I detect a note of softness?
Oh, no. No, Fonz.
I just thought he's our buddy, you know?
He's your buddy, too, Fonz.
Yeah, he's my buddy.
So what what difference does that make?
Come on, Fonz.
Where you going?
I don't want to get any crybaby tears
on my leather jacket.
We're coming to you live
from Arnold's Drive-In,
home of the Ricky Nelson burger
Hey, give me that thing before you hurt yourself.
All right, I'd like to make a dedication.
You would? Yeah.
I'd like to dedicate this next record
to Ruthie, Lois, Yvette, uh Marcy,
Betty, and the Bradley twins Binky and Bunny.
Thanks for Saturday night.
Hey!
Ho! Dance!
That wraps it up from Arnold's Hamburger Emporium.
This is Richie the "C" Richie Cunningham
Signing off and leaving the scene with his record machine.
Okay, we're off.
Way to go, Rich! Congratulations!
That was terrific. I'm proud of you, buddy.
Let's break it up, shall we?
Pardon me, folks. I'd like to talk to the star a minute.
Thank you very much.
See you later, Rich.
Listen, uh uh Rich, you had a slow start,
but it was a nice finish.
I'd like to talk to you for a minute, Mr. Bander.
Call me Norman, will you? What is it?
I wanted to talk to you about resigning.
Resigning?
But now you're a hit. Why now?
Well, I'm not much of a hit with my family or my friends.
It's no good having all those listeners
if nobody will talk to you.
Kid, you could be walking away from a real biggie.
Maybe. I'll go to college,
and see what happens after that.
Well, okay. It's your decision.
Good luck.
Thanks a lot, Mr. Bander.
Well, I quit being a deejay.
Does that mean Charlie the Prince
will get his old job back?
Well, it's there if he wants it.
Are you going to give me a speech now
on how I did the right thing?
No, dear. We're not going to give you a speech.
Although it would have been nice to have a famous son.
Marion.
You did the right thing, dear.
How come it always feels
like I'm missing out on something neat
whenever I do the right thing?
It's the curse of a teenager.
Hey, kid, if you do change your mind,
be sure and call me, hear?
Okay. Thanks. I hope I'm not leaving you in a bind.
I hope you won't have any trouble getting a replacement.
Oh, yeah, a replacement.
It's going to be tough.
Hey, uh amigo.
Senor? Come here.
Can you read this copy?
Pardone me, senor.
Pero yo no comprendo Ingles.
Hey, you know, a thing like that could catch on.
Be at my radio station tomorrow.
You're going to be my numero uno Axel jocko.
Forstanzi?
Here we go.
This day is ours, these are such happy days! ♪
Hello, sunshine, good-bye, rain ♪
She's wearing my school ring on her chain ♪
She's my steady, I'm her man ♪
I'm gonna love her all I can ♪
This day is ours ♪
Won't you be mine? ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
This day is ours ♪
Oh, please be mine ♪
Oh, happy days ♪
These happy days are yours and mine ♪
These happy days are yours and mine, happy days! ♪