Jackie Chan Adventures (2000) s02e25 Episode Script

1
Hurry, Jackie!
I know.
We mustn't
allow shendu
to release
the water demon.
No, hurry!
Uncle's legs are getting
a big cramp!
Join us, sister dearest.
(Screeches)
Whoa,
fish outta water.
At last, liberation!
And now,
- for some libation
Which will require
moister climes than this.
Uh-uh-uh
Now that
I have opened
the last portal,
sister bai tza,
it is time
to liberate me
from my prison
of flesh.
Gah!
You dare request
your freedom?
Have I not
earned it?
As promised,
I have released
all our brothers
and sisters.
How curious, then,
that 6 demon sorcerers
remain trapped in the void!
I should obliterate you
on their behalf.
(Gasps)
I held my part
of the bargain.
You cannot blame me
for the meddlings
of Jackie chan.
(Engine)
Speaking of whom
(Gasps) Quick, uncle!
The chi spell!
(Struggles)
Jackie, I am stuck.
I will not repeat
the mistakes of the others!
Finn: Chariot race
is over, chan.
It's gladiator time!
Strength
and honor.
Uhh.
Ech.
My suit!
Uncle, get in.
Ohhh.
(Growls)
Is it over?
Am I free of shendu?
Uh, the mermaid
said no deal, big v.
Uhh!
Quick, uncle.
The chi spell!
(Chants)
Your spells may have
quelled my siblings,
but I am the slippery one.
Aah!
(Slowed chanting)
Aah!
(Jittery chanting)
(Gasps)
(Honk honk)
Jade: Well,
guess we won't
be needing
that chi spell
after all.
Don't be so sure, Jade.
EhJade!
I thought I told you
to stay with
Tohru.
She is
- very persuasive.
Uhh, help me out.
I must cast
the chi spell.
Mamma Mia!
Aah!
(Quickly chanting)
Uhh!
Uncle:
The water demon
will return
to her undersea
empire.
Then, not even
my most powerful
chi spell
will stop her.
So forget the books.
Let's pack our
flippers and--uhh!
Research!
Bai tza's empire
is also known
as the lost continent
of Atlantis.
Atlantis?
I thought
it was merely
a myth.
No one has ever
been able to find it.
Heh. Hence
the "lost" part.
My empire lies in ruins!
Time has done its worst,
which means it is time
for me to claim
a new empire.
Wearing the skirt
is demeaning enough,
shendu
But this
is over the line!
Shendu:
Do you think
I am pleased
with our union,
valmont?
If I am to remain
in your pathetic body,
I must at least make
a few cosmetic improvements.
Now hold still
while I sprout our tail.
Valmont: You'll
do nothing of the--
shendu:
Do not try to--
valmont:
I'll fight you
with every last--
shendu:
And you will lose!
Shendu!
Good madam,
free me of shendu.
I beg you.
Look what he did
to my head!
Oh!
My answer to you
and my sniveling
brother remains
No.
Hoo-hoo.
Nasty piranha.
Bai tza: You!
Who, him?
Huh!
(Chuckles)
Hey, you're a fish.
I'm Finn.
We're simpatico--unh!
Direct me
to a suitable
new empire.
Uh, mi casa es su casa,
your amphibiousness.
A fish cannery?
See your point.
Well, there's lots
of nice places
here in San Fran,
and it's all
by the water.
Yeah,
great town.
MmExcept
for the quakes.
Earthquakes?
Uh, that's right.
The San Andreas fault
runs right through downtown.
Better idea
You should move
to the east coast.
Uhh!
So be it.
Your San Fran
shall be the cradle
of my new
undersea empire.
Uh, but isn't
your undersea
empire
supposed to be,
you know
Undersea?
And so it shall be
Once I sink this city.
She's gonna sink
the city?
Uh, can we be
excused, shendu?
Yeah, seein'
as how we opened
all the portals
for ya. Heh heh.
You don't need
us to carry
old pan ku
anymore.
Never seeing
any of you ever again
would make me
a very happy dragon.
Say bye-bye
to valmont.
Finn: I hear
Utah's nice
this time of year.
Chow: Anywhere but here.
Valmont: Weren't
you listening, shendu?
If we stay here,
we will drown.
Shendu:
Not if we have gills.
Valmont:
If you change so much
as another hair
on my head, I'll--
shendu:
You will what?
Do not be a fool.
The pan ku box is
forged of good magic.
You know
we cannot touch it.
Valmont:
No, you cannot
touch it.
Aaaaah!
Uhh.
(Gasps) My face
He's gone.
He's gone!
He's--
out cold.
I found Atlanta.
Does that count?
Uncle, this
is impossible.
Scientists
have been trying
to find Atlantis
for centuries.
(Bell jingles)
(Gasps)
Good evening.
What do you want?
Shh. You will
wake shendu.
He's napping?
I rendered him
unconscious.
Now please,
you must help me.
I want him exorcised!
Like we're gonna
help shendu
get in shape!
Ex-or-cised, Jane.
He wants
to remove
shendu's spirit
from his body.
But why should
we help you?
Because there
is nothing
that either of us
wants more
than to be rid
of that blasted
fire demon.
A dark hand trick.
N-no tricks. I will
tell you anything
you want to know.
Uh, our hideout
It's the helms
fish cannery.
That's nice,
but we have
bigger fish to fry.
Like finding the demon
you unleashed, remember?
UnhShe's
in San Francisco!
Bai tza?
Here?
Where?
(Clears throat)
You scratch my back,
I scratch yours.
Hmm. Hmmmm
(Gags)
Bai tza's planning
to sink San Francisco
by causing an earthquake?
But how?
Just because I am
possessed by a demon
doesn't mean I can
read their minds.
She would need
to jar the fault
with an explosion or--
a flood.
Tea, sensei?
Thank you.
Valmont:
Jolly good, tohru.
I would love a spot.
(Growls)
Uhh, right, then.
This han zi
àwill suppress
shendu's spirit
until I am able
to concoct
a true
exorcism spell.
Well, it's more becoming
than a horn, I suppose.
Tohru, you must go
with Jackie to cast
the water demon's
chi spell.
Yes, sensei.
Ta-ta.
Best of luck.
Come with us.
Awesome!
Not you,
Jade.
You.
Aww.
But
The exorcism
spell.
You have resources.
We need them.
It's a big city,
chan.
Jackie:
I am following
what we know
to be the path
of the fault line
for any sign of bai tza
That is, unless you have
any better ideas?
Just like old times,
eh, tohru?
(Growls)
I recommend you watch
your back, chan.
Tohru turned coat
on me, you remember?
You forced me
to fight a demon.
Oh, yes, that's
completely different
from what chan
has you doing.
Jackie: Shh!
Down!
1, 2
(Battle cries)
Hyah!
Heh. Thought you guys
looked fishy.
So this is why
your niece
is always
with you.
And here
I just thought
you were horribly
irresponsible.
Jade, how did--
had section 13
hook me up
with satellite
surveillance. Duh.
Bai!
And good-bye
to you, Jade.
No. Bai tza!
Why embarcadero
station?
Perhaps
she's hopping Bart
to the bay aquarium.
(Chanting)
I have seen
such symbols
in uncle's books
used for
summoning spells.
What's
she trying
to summon?
Enough water
for a flood?
The station's
lower levels
are underground,
closer to the fault.
And I can't imagine
the subway system was built
to withstand
the crushing pressure
of raging
floodwaters.
Quickly, tohru.
The chi spell!
I need
preparation time.
I will run interference.
(Chanting)
Safe!
(Screams)
Aaaaah!
How nice
to just stand back
and watch chan work.
I must be within range.
If Jade does not
remain safe,
I will turn you
inside out.
(Nervous)
Ah ha ha ha.
I wont let her
out of my sight,
old chap.
Aah!
Uhh!
Uh-uh-uh.
Stay right here
with uncle valmont.
(Growls)
(Chanting)
(Chanting)
(Both chanting
respective spells)
Aaaaaah!
Aaaaaah!
Uhh!
I hate fish.
Where is
The gourd!
Lose something?
Oof!
Hyah!
(Struggles)
I want to hold your hand.
Oof!
(Angry roar)
Uncle, we need
another gourd.
And while
you're at it,
we need to break
a water-summoning
spell.
Aiyaaa!
Too many spells!
Um, and how's
that exorcism
spell coming?
(Angry roar)
I'm going
for the gourd.
(Deep breath)
Welcome to my world, chan!
Whoa!
Jackie!
Funny, I'm not sure
who to root for.
Ow!
Go Jackie.
Go valmont.
And ruin
my Italian shoes?
And keep shendu
for a roommate?
Oh, all right.
(Battle cry)
You dare
to betray me, shendu?
Yes, he does.
I insist you remove him
from me at once
and give him a trouncing.
Ohh!
(Gasps) Valmont?
AhhChan?!
They've been
playing tricks
on you, brother.
Then they shall suffer
a dragon's fury!
Aaah!
(Choking coughs)
(Water draining)
Aah!
(Chanting)
Uncle broke
your spe-ell
(chants)
Aah!
Uncle! Exorcism!
(Snarls)
We scared him off!
Uncle,
you did not remove
shendu
from valmont--ow!
With what spell?
Too many
interruptions!
I had to concoct
anti-water-summoning
spell first!
So bai tza and shendu
remain at large.
Jackie, hello?
You just
saved the city
from the big one!
She will return.
And when she does,
we'll hook her
like a trout.
Now come on.
I say we treat you
to a pan ku breakfast.
Pan ku
I meant pancake. Duh!
Now that sounds
good, Jade.
I can sell these
hey, Jackie.
Are you a good swimmer?
No, I'm--
I'mVery bad.
I do swim
in the private pool.
First time I went
to the deep sea,
you know, on the boat,
I was like
When we stopped,
we had to go to the beach.
Everybody jumped.
One by one jumped.
I say, "they jump?
I jump." You know,
I jumped down,
but I come into--
(Gasps)
I'm scared about swimming.