Smiling Friends (2020) s03e02 Episode Script

Oh, hello.
Mr. President, sir,
we did everything you said
and we're happy to report
that the final pockets of resistance
were successfully terminated.
Every country at the United Nations
has officially surrendered
and declared you
the supreme emperor of Earth.
Hello, what does that mean?
You won.
There's literally nothing left
for you to do.
You completely and totally won.
Oh.
What's wrong, sir?
This sucks now. I quit. Fuck you.
Wait, since you ate your vice president,
who should take your place?
What about that peanut?
-President Peanut!
-President Peanut!
-President Peanut!
-President Peanut!
All hail the Peanut!
So what's got you down today, sir?
I can't see anything! I don't know why!
Help me, please! I'm freaking out!
Have you tried just moving
your hands away from your eyes?
Oh my God! I can see!
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
-No problem, man.
-Glad to help.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
La-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪
Man, that guy had
a pure heart of gold, Pim.
I don't say it that often,
but that guy had a pure,
pure heart of bullion gold, man.
Yeah, he was a lovely man. He really was.
Hey, by the way, do you want to get lunch?
Yeah, sure. There's a bar nearby
that does really good meatloaf, man.
Th-- The way they get the slime is just--
they get it perfect. Oh, it's so good.
Dust in the wind ♪
What you looking at, baby?
Dust in the wind ♪
Everything is dust in the wind ♪
All right, man. Nice job.
Wait, is that Mr. Frog?
Yeah, man. It looks
like he's just enjoying himself now
after walking away from being
the most powerful man on the planet.
Hmm. I don't know.
He looks pretty sad to me.
Should we go see if he's all right?
Nah, dude, he'll be all right.
He's Mr. Frog.
Hey, man, I'm sorry to interrupt you, bro.
I just wanted to tell you,
like, I'm a huge fan, bro.
The TV stuff, the presidency,
everything you ever did, man.
Like, you want to fuck my girlfriend?
Oh, I can't be bothered.
Hey, the offer still stands, amigo.
Look, that's us.
Room 302. Up to you, man.
Maybe you're right, Pim.
I think something's wrong with Mr. Frog.
Hi, Mr. Frog.
I don't know if you remember us,
but we helped you out a while back.
Oh, hello.
Mr. Frog, sir, if I could ask,
like, what's wrong with you, man?
You used to be at the top of the world.
Oh, I don't know.
I feel empty for some reason.
Well, maybe it's because you've achieved
everything possible in life,
and now it seems like
there's nothing left to do.
But that's okay,
because Charlie and I can help you.
-Did you want us to help you, or--
-No, yeah, I do.
-I was just--
-Okay.
Yeah, please, hello.
Cool. I have an idea
for something we could do.
All right, Mr. Frog, listen up.
All we got to do to make you feel better
is give you a new goal, okay?
A new challenge, a new thing to get into
and rise the ranks of
and master and dominate!
-All right?
-Okay.
That's the spirit! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah.
And in our left corner,
we have ex-television star,
richest man in the world,
and former emperor of Earth,
Mr. Frog!
In our other corner,
we have the most violent,
mentally ill,
psychopathic maniac on the planet,
The Insanely Crazy Lunatic!
What? No! Send in more fighters!
Release them!
Damn, dude. You literally
didn't throw a single punch,
and you became
the number one UFC champion
on your first and your only fight.
I mean, like, I get how you're depressed.
That's crazy. That's--
I mean, the medals are nice, though.
I like how shiny--
They're, you know, just--
They're kind of nice to look at.
I don't even want these.
Can I have them? Okay, that's fine.
Look, Mr. Frog, achieving goals is good
for getting you out of bed in the morning,
but it's not the only thing
that brings happiness.
There are other things, too.
What do you mean, hello?
Well, let me show you.
If you're feeling down
Maybe you need ♪
To check and see
If you've got all you need ♪
How about friends?
You've got me and Charlie ♪
And we'll be nice friends to you ♪
What about love?
Another thing that's good ♪
Love makes the world
Feel yummy and good ♪
And what about family?
Family is key ♪
Look at this little family of bees ♪
There are so many-- ♪
Oh my God, dude!
-Dude, Pim, are you okay, man?
-Family?
Pim! Pim! Can you hear me?
I don't know who you are,
but I think you've helped me.
-Thank you.
-Pim, listen to me.
I need you to stay with me, dude.
How many fingers am I holding up?
Can you see?
Oh. Hello, Son.
Hello, Dad.
I suppose you want to come in.
Yes, please.
You still take sugar?
No, thank you.
I'm trying to watch my figure.
Haven't heard from you in a while.
Yeah, I-- I've been busy.
You know, your mother passed away
three months ago.
Cancer.
She asked about you.
Everyone does.
Saw you on that TV show eating that bug
or whatever it was.
Then we all saw you become president.
Everyone said to me,
"Oh, how's your boy doing?"
"You must be so proud of him."
I would nod my head,
but I didn't have the heart to tell them
I was embarrassed.
Embarrassed to see you on that TV screen,
making a fool of yourself,
making a fool of the Frog name.
Do you have any idea, any idea
how hard it's been for me?
-I'm sorry.
-Sorry?
Be sorry for your poor mother,
whose last words were,
"Where is he?
Where's my boy? Where's my boy?"
No, no!
You walked out on this family,
and now you come back?
Now you have the nerve
to show your face around here?
You're a disgrace!
Get out of my house!
I have no son.
Hello.
The silence is nice.
Hello, Mr. Frog.
You did it.
You've achieved inner peace.
Hello. Who are you?
I am the Bug of Knowledge.
I have all the answers
to all of life's questions.
But before I reveal them,
there is something I must ask you.
Okay.
My computer's been acting
really slow lately,
and I'm just going around
asking anybody who can help.
I mean, anybody who can help
with my computer,
because it's a real prob--
I need-- I need it for work.
Maybe it's a virus?
No, no, I called Geek Squad
and they said it was--
They checked it out
and they said it wasn't a virus,
so I know it's not that.
I know it's not that.
-But--
-Is it-- But--
-Oh, sorry, you go.
-Sorry.
-You go. You go.
-I don't know, I--
I really have no idea.
Yeah, me neither. I don't know.
I honestly don't know.
I mean, when I say-- when I say brow--
like, slow browser,
does that scream software to you
or a hardware problem?
Oh, I don't know.
No, that's cool, man.
I fi-- I mean, I figured.
I appreciate the help anyways.
I mean, I'll probably just need
a whole new computer at this point.
Hello, what am I doing here?
Oh, yeah. You just need to eat me
and all will be clear.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Dude, I'm just letting you know right now
he looks a little bit different,
but don't-- don't react.
Don't react. Please try not to react.
Oh, wow. Thanks for the heads up.
Yeah, I-- I think--
I think the swelling is still there,
so just-- I mean, again,
just be ready for it.
-Hey, guys.
-Hey!
-Hey, man.
-Pim! Hey, how you doing, buddy?
Is it bad?
-No, dude, it's fine, it's fine.
-No, I didn't even notice.
Thanks, guys.
I'm the same old Pim on the inside.
Yo, you guys see Pim's new
fucking head on Facebook? Oh!